He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.
A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly...
People say I'm crazy
Doing what I'm doing
Well, they give me all kinds of warnings
To save me from ruin
When I say that I'm okay
Well, they look at me kinda strange
Thank you Mother Earth!Dressed in a pair of good, solid muck boots, sturdy old jeans and a light slicker I slipped and slid through the little wood's spring bramble and last fall's...
I know my real home is Heaven because my creator lives in Heaven and I am his child. God loves me so much, and unconditionally. I know that deep inside me there is a spirit and...
When I lived in CA we used to have tremors almost everyday, but it never scared me, because I was used to it. Now I live in near another huge fault line and the scientists that...
"Long ago before the first human
Before the first tree
Her life began
She breathes and grows
blood rushes through her veins
She can feel pain
She can feed us when we are hungry...
There's nothing nicer than a girls big round butt. and it's never a bad thing if she knows how to shake it
Paul Bunyan may be able to knock down a whole forrest with one swing of his ax but Chuck Norris can take out a whole forrest with one roundhouse kick.
I have a small potbelly. If I wear my tight shirts, you can definitely see my chubby belly.
There is this girl in my physical science class who has a good size of a potbelly. It...
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.
Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked her into a glacier.
The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick. They didn't even come close.
Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy.
The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.
Yes there is no better feeling than being loved. Just hearing the words I love you makes you feel like you are special and warm inside.Whether it's an I love you from your mum...
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first...
There's just something about a girl who's a bit round that makes her more beautiful xD
Chuck Norris has never been in a fight, ever. Do you call one roundhouse kick to the face a fight?
The most dangerous form of transportation is Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick, it is also the fastest.
Yes, I have a huge thing for small boobs. Small boobs have always been a turn on for me. Small boobs on small girls = incredibly hot. I've never had boobs myself, there's just...
Archeologists in India recently uncovered a new dinosaur. It’s actually many dinosaurs but one is in the middle of all the others. The one in the middle is believed to have...
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don’t really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
I'm a very down to earth person. Follow me on twitter : kkelseeey_
Snapchat : heeykelseey
Instagram : ohhikels
After Fridays 5.1 earthquake. . There has been over 100 aftershocks. Saturday's 4.3 aftershock has the neighborhood freaked out.. Is the end near?
Then lets" ROCK IT "
On Friday, March 28, 2014 was the 1st time I felt an earthquake. I'm not originally from here (L.A.). I'm from the South. It was a scary, but fun experience. Not 1 of my belongings...
Why the hell dose earth even exists
I try to be a down to earth person and tell it like it is. I like to keep my life simple as I can and be good to myself.
I don't believe in a religion, but instead see similarities between them all. They all have an underlying meaning just interpreted differently throughout the many different races...
I really believe that wickedness is evil. It sickens me and disgusts me to see people rain cruelty on others. The weak and meek get it always. The bullies trample on these just...
Any ladies that like to show off there booty kick me at bigheaddi
Curiosity killed the cat. Chuck Norris killed Curiosity.
Sex with you is amazing. Gets so wet. Love how you squirt on me. Never had a squirter, it's amazing and makes me want to go harder. Love it..
When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
My belly is soo ticklish anyone can tickle it I don't mind message me
The beauty of a big belly. The way it hangs down. The way it jiggles and wiggles when she walks. The smooth softness of its feel and the play of it in my hands. These things light...
I have a nice fat belly but it's still to small i haven't told my mum as I'm worried but if I do I'll gain lots more so i don't know. If you like being fat message me (I'd prefer...
AM I NOT PRETTY ENOUGHHHH hahahahahahahah
I just ate 3 hotdogs XD :) 220 pounds here I come, hopefully :)
How do y'all like this? :-)
My amazing belly :-) Its so jiggly and fluffy :-) I'd love a girl who likes it to message and talk about our interests and experiences :-)
I grew up in an environment where showing emotions is considered a joke, or something embarrassing that people will have to comment on.. Or at least this is how I have always felt...
Lol he was wanting to tlk and i was like sure and hes the coolest but he said he had no friends .....HOW???
I Work At A Burger King And We Meet And See All Kinds Of Diff. People Well... Every Since I Have Started Working There I Have Gotten The Chance To Speak To Lots Of People That Don...
Sometimes I wish I am not! All those people who takes advantage of me thinking I am so innocent and naive. argh, that sickens me. I can be raw at times. Only few people knows about...
I would love to be a pioneer simply for 'simplicities sake'.
I just don't want all the hardships.