I Am Battling Alcoholism

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 113 People

    I want to work a 12 step program

    but I fear I am constitutionally incapable of being honest with myself.......I am blocked from prayer by some of my favorite defects.....all the while my soul craves to feel good and again I choose the bottle
    selfwillrunriot selfwillrunriot
    31-35, M
    Apr 1, 2014

    Cant Stop

    I guess you can call me a binge drinker. I'll go a awhile and have a drink then I have to have more, more with my friends. Don't want to stop until the effect has worn off and I am feeling miserable , a broken piece of a person. Why couldn't have just the glass of wine? Why the...
    athenagirl athenagirl
    13-15, F
    1 Response Sep 8, 2010

    I need help Struggling to stay away from the

    Booze It started in January this year when I went through a tough time Been turning to booze ever since Missed an important meeting this morning because I was too hungover I need a friend here Like a sponsor
    thedrunk1980 thedrunk1980
    31-35, F
    11 Responses Sep 25, 2014

    I Need Help

    i am battling alcoholism i really want to stop but i find it hard. when ever i feel low i think drink will help but it wont it just maked it harder for me.
    needhelp20 needhelp20
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jun 18, 2007

    In Memory Of ?

      My drinking began at thirteen,i remember some-one saying way back then i would become an alcholic.I always had a relationship with the bottle,but as my kids grew older and less dependant on me i drank more.I remarried five years ago and for the first time in my life,i had...
    kittywake kittywake
    51-55, F
    10 Responses Dec 22, 2009

    Its A Everyday Battle

    , a loosing battle. Every morning I wake up saying I will not have a drink today, and every evening I end up drinking.. And in the evening I say to myself I will not drink tomorrow.. But this has been the story of my life for years now. Quite a few of my family members have been...
    Eddiecrow Eddiecrow
    41-45, M
    3 Responses Nov 8, 2013

    Day two of no liquor.

    I'm doing okay but my excitability is through the roof. Any other time it would be awesome but I feel like it's leading to anxiety.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Jun 9, 2015

    Vicious Cycle

    My grandfather died from complications due to being an alcoholic. My mother said he would drink morning to night. He would abuse animals and my Mother and her brothers and sisters, including sexual rape. He would pass out with a bottle in his hand. I have been a heavy drinker for...
    GenieDanielle GenieDanielle
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Aug 22, 2013

    Really Want To Stop

    I am 26 yrs old and have been drinking since i was 18 but didnt really start getting out of controll till bout 4 years ago. I am not a daily drinker cuz of my workschedule. But on my days off i drink from the time i get up to i pass out. I have tore my family apart because i get...
    b687 b687
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Aug 22, 2013

    I am signing up for an outpatient program

    for alcohol tomorrow and I am really nervous. I am not good about talking about feelings or my personal life and I know they will ask me to do that. We'll see what happens I guess
    Elwood1981 Elwood1981
    31-35, M
    Oct 25, 2015

    "Being in detox is nothing to brag about,

    especially if your content challenges the tenets of AA (Alcoholics Anonymous). Regardless, I'd like to share a story about an experience I found comically cliche. This is the story of a room of four detoxing alcohol dependent subjects who were interviewed by four AA volunteers...
    errantdog errantdog
    31-35, M
    Sep 12, 2015

    I Go to Aa For Help

    I battle alcoholism, it nearly ruined my life, but I go to AA now, and it is changing my life!  I look forward to the meetings and i have 6 months sober!
    cowgirl67 cowgirl67
    36-40, F
    8 Responses Feb 20, 2008

    Binge Drinking

    I started drinking right before I turned 21. It has been a downhill ride from there and would like desperately to stop. It has caused a great deal of pain for me and my loved ones.  It is easy for me to convince myself that I have no problem, I am a binge drinker. I can go...
    ihatescrewtape ihatescrewtape
    26-30
    3 Responses Apr 14, 2010

    I Have Finally Admitted and Accepted My Disease.

    I came from an alcoholic background and i always was terrified of the fact that i too would get this disease.  I guess i always knew that i had it, i just could never admit it. I started drinking at 11, was getting black outs and drinking myself into oblivion at 13. ...
    Angeleyes777 Angeleyes777
    31-35, F
    7 Responses Sep 15, 2009

    I Am An Alcoholic But Dont Want to Go to Aa

    I am battling alcoholism right now but can't get myself to go to the meetings.  I am here hoping to make friends online that share my problem so that we can help eachother
    addict1973 addict1973
    31-35, F
    14 Responses Oct 8, 2008

    Is Staying Sober Forever Impossible?

    After reading a novel about addiction it dawned on me why it’s so difficult to get free from any addiction, be it alcohol, pills (benzodiazepins), pain killers, or narcotics.Ironically addicts (including alcoholics) do not use a substance to get high. They use it to get normal...
    chloral chloral
    61-65, M
    5 Responses Jan 5, 2012

    Help Me God If There Is A God

    there are days i am fine. all is dandy and nothing can put me down. but other days i wish i was dead so i could be done with this world. nothing in my life is so terrible of course we all havve demons myself included by why oh why cant i stop drinking? one beer is never enough...
    lunaluv lunaluv
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 3, 2010

    6 years ago I admitted I was alcoholic.

    I do believe that I am, I have the allergy coupled with the obsession. Ever since I started to try and recover through the 12 steps it has been recovery or drink. It is really frustrating I sober up for periods of time by working with other alcoholics to help solve our common...
    selfwillrunriot selfwillrunriot
    31-35, M
    Mar 30, 2014

    Medical Treatment, The Only Way Out

    I am 35 and have been drinking heavily for 8 years. I have tried hard to quit only to drink more and more. I admit that alcoholism is a desease and need to be treated medically. I recently came across a treatment method which was discovered by Dr. Wilfred Packard Bonin in US. I...
    pilottz pilottz
    31-35
    Apr 7, 2011

    Hey there! Check out my drunkablog.

    Stay safe and sober! Best wishes, Spin.Sorry. Can't seem to make this link work. But, here it is. Thanks.http://spindabottle.blogs.experienceproject.com/742499.html
    spindabottle spindabottle
    36-40
    1 Response Jan 20, 2014

    I Am Scared

    I really am scared. I grew up with alcoholism all around me.  I started drinking at the ripe old age of 14 thinking that was the norm.  My alcoholic uncle actually encouraged it and would buy the beer.  One day, at 23, I woke up outdoors behind a rental cabin soaked in urine...
    bobrido bobrido
    46-50, M
    1 Response Sep 22, 2013

    Battle With Alcoholism

    What a jouney this has been.  I stayed drunk on a daily basis for about 20 years. I felt so alone all the time y'no never a part of anything. I became suicidal but never wanted to look at the drinking because it was a way of life, the only way I knew.  In my...
    chelled chelled
    36-40
    4 Responses Nov 25, 2008

    My Ambivalence Towards Aa

    You know, I go back and forth about AA. I remember a quote from Ghandi: "I love your Christ, I don't like your Christians." Ditto, AA. I love the program, but I'm not really crazy about some of the old timers. I think the program is practically unassailable in so many ways. There...
    mariaweeks mariaweeks
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Mar 16, 2012

    Why Can't I Just Stop

    Hi all i am 23 years old and can't stop drinking it started when I was 18 and haven't stopped since i have recently managed to stop using drugs but can't escape my drinking habits. I drink everyday usually spirits followed by pints when my cash is low. I drink before i leave my...
    Nomoreblank Nomoreblank
    22-25
    3 Responses Mar 14, 2011

    I've been sober for fourteen months now

    and the last three months have been terrible. I've slowly started coss addicting to sex( read my sugar daddy chronicles) and the urge to have a drink when I'm with one of these one night stands is getting stronger. Worse, one of my sugar babies is addicted to weed, and when I'm...
    Sugarman245 Sugarman245
    46-50, M
    2 Responses Jan 13, 2014

    I am signing up for an outpatient program

    tomorrow and I'm nervous. I'm not good at sharing my feelings or talking about personal stuff and I know that's what they're going to expect of me. I guess we'll see what happens
    Elwood1981 Elwood1981
    31-35, M
    1 Response Oct 25, 2015

    One Step Away

    I'm 24 years old and I'm nearly an alcoholic. I can feel it grabbing hold of me and not letting go. One sip and I get carried away until I pass out. When I take that first drop my body craves more and more, but up until 8pm I can go the entire day without a drop, but around 8...
    SadRanger SadRanger
    22-25, M
    1 Response Apr 25, 2010

    Addicted to alcohol for the last 7 years.

    Binge drinker. Finish a pint of vodka in 10 to 20 minutes. Used it as sleep med. Can't have alcohol in the house. Burned too many bridges. Been out of work for the past 2 years because of my own choice to isolate myself. Been unable to function socially. Bi-polar. Mood swings...
    bent2 bent2
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Dec 17, 2013

    I slipped into a rut last week,

    and on through the weekend. I am hoping to get back on solid ground this week. I refuse to give up!
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Jun 22, 2015

    Dogma And The Newcomer

    AA Dogma and the NewcomerI will always have an affectionate affinity towards AA. AA feels homey; tolerant . . . It reminds me of my own big, happy dysfunctional family.   In meetings, low-bottom drunks or angry people are perennially spouting off and the offenders are usually...
    mariaweeks mariaweeks
    46-50, F
    1 Response May 16, 2013

    The Maddness Stops Now

    This is going to be a new and much better for me. I'm 28 and have been an alcoholic for a little over 5 years. 5 destructive and very painful years. I've humiliated myself countless time. I've injured my self too many times to count...its recently gotten worse. I've lied and...
    apachetears apachetears
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jan 1, 2011

    Hi

    I had about 13 months sobriety and relapsed a few months ago.  Since then I have been unable to get more then like 8 or 9 days sober.  I'm ruining my life(again) and nothing seems to be working.  I was going to AA meetings everyday and drinking at night, then...
    Justin9976 Justin9976
    31-35, M
    3 Responses Nov 2, 2009

    I Did Lose Everything

    I'm not sure when it happened but at some point, guided by what seems like a supernatural power, alcohol and cocaine became more important than my marriage, children and dignity.  My actions while under the influence can never be taken back.  I am in early recovery and...
    cautioussalvage cautioussalvage
    31-35
    2 Responses Jul 20, 2009

    My wife and I have been arguing a lot lately.

    It's making it so hard to not drink. I don't play the blame game, I just want to get to the root of the problem.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Jun 24, 2015

    Acceptance Is The Answer....

    My mom got sober when I was 16- oddly enough that was when my drinking got worse. By the time I was 19 I was a full blown alcoholic. My mom convinced me to go to an open meeting with her, she said "for support" and "to see where she came from"... Riiiiight! I came home from that...
    corra72910 corra72910
    26-30, F
    3 Responses May 17, 2011

    Related Experiences

    I'm wishing everyone the best on their journey when I first joined here I was very depressed and heartbroken feeling lost. I'm glad to say I'm feeling a lot better still have...
    Devinefaith Devinefaith
    26-30, F
    Apr 21
    Where to begin? Ep is such a bitter sweet friend. Perhaps this is a sign from the heavens above that time brings everything to an end. This journey we call Life is a strange but...
    BeardedJustice BeardedJustice
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 20
    I am not sure how to say what I am feeling right now, but I have felt this way for a very___ long time. I don't like swearing, but fill in these blanks with whatever the heck your...
    stewartgreen stewartgreen
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 18
    BATTLING SLEEPINESS ... I left home last monday and for work I travelled hundreds and hundreds of miles, took 4 high speed trains, changed 4 hotels in 4 different cities, ate in...
    LozzyFromRome LozzyFromRome
    46-50, M
    3 Responses Apr 18
    It's almost been a year since I lost my father. He died in May 2015 after battling bladder cancer. I feel so bad that I couldn't be there with him during his final days at the...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Apr 16
    My depression is finally going away. I sometimes feel myself clicking in and out of feeling normal. I can finally get out of bed and feel like I have a purpose again. I can...
    pianokat pianokat
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Apr 16
    EVER REMEMBER THIS - - > JESUS LOVES YOU.
    Lincoln98 Lincoln98
    16-17, M
    Apr 14
    you know i just wanna write something how i feeltoo bad i am not that rich otherwise i wanna createan organization that would make the dreams come trueof the people battling HIV...
    bimvim bimvim
    18-21, M
    Apr 14
    i simply salute the people battling HIV/AIDS not giving up trying to live the life enjoy every moment i wish i could help you in some way make your life easier better if i...
    bimvim bimvim
    18-21, M
    Apr 14
    Recently, I've been thinking back to my childhood quite a bit and considering how alcoholism affected it. Being a college student, I've had some distance that's helped me to...
    BrianBill BrianBill
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 14
    I think I might be lonely forever. I have been battling with myself for so long that I no longer know why I am fighting half the time. Picking a fight with anyone who shows remote...
    UnicornsOfHope UnicornsOfHope
    26-30
    Apr 14
    I joined the Experience Project two and a half years ago, and it's been with me through the hardest two and a half years of my life. Eating disorder, alcoholism, cutting, addiction...
    punicorn1 punicorn1
    16-17, F
    Apr 11
    I lost my Dad when I was 9 yrs old & have had a lot of issues with that which include the lack of male intimacy not in a sexual way of course, but in a way of wanting to be able to...
    TheAMan1988 TheAMan1988
    26-30, M
    Apr 11
    So my brother just told me he was depressed because of work and stress. I wish I could open up to him and tell him that I have been battling anxiety since I was 2 and since I was 4...
    writingforlife6 writingforlife6
    18-21, F
    1 Response Apr 11
    (I refer this to Christians going through TRIALS or/and TEMPTATIONS, lest a fellow wishes to wrongly counter the write-up) Dear Christians and whomever this may concern, God...
    Lincoln98 Lincoln98
    16-17, M
    Apr 10
    I have been battling for in excess of three years for child support. I am tired, I am getting suicidal and even though I am on anti depressants I am depressed, But I will never...
    sinaan sinaan
    41-45, F
    1 Response Apr 10
    Good evening, I am a college student with a fraternal twin brother. Consider this a venting session and please advice is welcome. My mother is a full blown narcissist. We have to...
    Labradorowner22 Labradorowner22
    18-21, F
    Apr 9
    I have been self harming since I was 13 years old. As of today, I'm 24. That's over 10 years I've struggled with this dependency. I'm currently 14 days clean; two weeks. Before...
    Eissacle Eissacle
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Apr 9
    MY VERY LAST PUBLIC DEDICATION TO THE LAST FRIEND IN MY CIRCLE OF FRIENDS AND I AM READY FOR CLOSURE IN EP.... ...we made our acquintance when you commented one of my frequent...
    LozzyFromRome LozzyFromRome
    46-50, M
    3 Responses Apr 9
    So bring on giant falcons and Miami dolphins! Show me what you got!
    A7madh A7madh
    13-15, M
    Apr 7
    I want a better life than this ... I m constantly battling to live a better life but nothing seem working right now... I just wanna disappear for a while .... No one cares tbh...
    Dezeena Dezeena
    26-30, F
    Apr 4
    With the years continuing on within my life, where I have been battling my constant impulses in having to live two lives inside me one as a male within the public life and a the...
    Nightimegal Nightimegal
    46-50, T
    Apr 4
    i was just thinking back on my life and my present life. how I've been battling depression and anxiety for years. and i read something on face book that brought me to thinking...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Apr 3
    Thinking💭about my life when I was still a working class dude, it was never difficult helping people who needed my help both at my place of work and also at charity homes and...
    Mcqueenandre Mcqueenandre
    41-45, M
    Apr 3
    For with God nothing will be impossible (Luke 1:37). There yet is hope for you in Christ. Whatever your problem may be, and however seemingly grave the situation miay be, it is...
    Lincoln98 Lincoln98
    16-17, M
    Apr 3
More Stories