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I Am Building This Wall Around My Heart

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 217 People

    Yep! Snowy Is A Wall Builder ~

    I am a wall builder..ask anyone that knows me well. If you hurt me- up the wall goes, if you betray me- up the wall goes... higher and higher each time. And while I know this is a defense mechanism it is so hard not to do even to those who love me. In my lifetime I have been...
    snowbunny1002 snowbunny1002 46-50, F 43 Responses May 30, 2010

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    I Need To Protect My Heart

    No matter what i do in a relationship they always leave me for someone else and take a piece of my heart with them. I'm so sick of being hurt because everytime i let someone into my heart they turn around and hurt me. So this time i wont let down my walls ... I wont get hurt...
    Tayuya Tayuya 18-21, F 3 Responses Jun 1, 2010

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    This Wall Of Mine ... I'm Gonna Let It Shine

    You won't break into this heart again! I must keep you out because you are breaking it all over again into those tiny little shards that cut me deeply and i am trying to place them all back together when you have finished. To me you was once just a dream ... someone i was...
    deadinsideout deadinsideout 26-30, F Jul 10, 2013

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    Hard To Let Go

    If you ever read this, i want you to know that i love you with all my heart. You are my life. My reason for breathing. I want to have your children. I want to be with you for as long as i live. There is only 1 problem, you dont love me. You dont even consider me as a girlfriend...
    tracili tracili 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 3, 2010

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    Done

    Finished.  End.  No more love from me.  I just can't keep giving it out when i never seem to get it back.  In the end, it's just me here, always.  Shame I don't really like myself. 
    Anesthesia Anesthesia 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 2, 2010

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    I know I'm not the type to be loved.

    I know what men want and it has nothing to do with my heart. The walls are slowly being built. It is a long painful process but one that will be worth it in the end. I will not fall again.
    bzylady bzylady 36-40, F 1 Response Aug 21, 2014

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    </3

    I just recently broke up with my boyfriend that i love with all my heart. Being to attached to him i realize now was a very bad thing. I fell to hard for him and i feel lost in this world. There is this guy who seems interested in me in my school. I feel like no matter how nice...
    karleemcdonald1 karleemcdonald1 16-17, F May 31, 2010

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    Quote...

    Quote: sometimes we build up walls - not to keep people out but to see who cares enough to knock them down?
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Aug 28, 2010

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    Building Up My Wall, Permanently

    I don't want to have another broken heart ever. It's humiliating, dillusioning, wasteful, egotistical and pathetic. I don't tell people of the pain I feel, I have people at armslength but not even my closest friends know of my perpetual sadness. I prefer to grow old alone than to...
    roxyyn roxyyn 18-21 2 Responses Jan 10, 2011

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    Hurt By Those Whom Shouldn't

    Ever since I was a small girl I have always kept people at a distance. Useing masks or remaining emotionless, keeping others who stand in the light of life away from the dark shadows in which I seek sanctuary. Why? I'm not entirely sure... I think a part of it is because I was...
    buckisinfomedia buckisinfomedia 18-21, F 1 Response May 30, 2010

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    :-/

    Why do people have to be this lonely? What's the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? Was the earth put here just to nourish human loneliness?
    chellaa chellaa 22-25, F 3 Responses Oct 5, 2011

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    Safety ...

    This is just not me at all.  I've never been this way ... no wall building for me.   But recently I can feel myself getting ready to go out shopping for the bricks and mortar ... looking for the trowel ... getting the "How to Build a Wall" manual out ...  It's a...
    womaninbliss womaninbliss 51-55, F 4 Responses May 30, 2010

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    You Call It "hiding",i Call It "protection".

    Sometimes we build walls not to keep people out,but to see who cares enough to knock them down.You may say that Im hiding i say im protecting my heart,for it has been broke way too many times because i let all of the wrong people in. well i am tired of trying to hide the...
    SadEyedAngel126 SadEyedAngel126 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 16, 2010

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    The Reason Why I'm Guarded

    I have watched so many failed marriages growing up that it really tainted my views of love and relationships. My parents have been married several times each. My mom left two out of three of her husbands for another man and my dad always married the wrong women. I am also pretty...
    neverbroken21 neverbroken21 22-25, F 2 Responses Dec 14, 2010

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    Thursday Night 'Fun'

    So here it is...currently at a live night concert with a friend. Local bands playing throughout, you know, all fun and stuff. People enjoying themselves, conversation going on, supposedly a great time. Here's the truth though...really not as fun. Every Thursday our local brewery...
    DenKarp DenKarp 18-21, M 1 Response Aug 29, 2013

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    ...

    I realize that I am doing now but it isn't to keep one person out but all others. 
    fungirlmmm fungirlmmm 41-45, F 25 Responses May 29, 2010

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    A Valentines Poem... I Wish You Can See This...

    I love valentines with hate so dear Loathing with eyes wide as hearts appear On this day i begin to see Valentines does not begin with C Everytime I feel its presence Yelling and screaming while they smile with presents Ordinarily I would partake Understand now that there is no...
    poying55 poying55 13-15, M 1 Response Feb 15, 2011

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    Hmm More Like A Cage

    Has anyone see the sponge bob episode where he has the old krappy pati in the cage and it braked and growled everytime someone came near. That's like my heart. Has a cage around it..
    eyeslikestars eyeslikestars 26-30, F Jan 15, 2011

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    As I pick up the pieces to my heart I'm also

    building a wall around it one brick at time. I should have listened to my gut in the beginning but I decided to follow my heart.
    Hanna36 Hanna36 36-40, F Aug 4

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    I Need To Feel Safe

    Outgoing and sarcastic, fun loving, loyal.... Always up for a new adventure, this is the illusion that I portray to everyone..... In reality I'm the complete opposite. I will always assume that you have a hidden motive in getting to know me. I think I'm better off just being...
    Jan 29, 2013

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    I Won't Disturb The Slumber Of Feelings That Have Died

      This pretty much says it all.....
    underconstruction underconstruction 41-45, F 6 Responses Dec 14, 2010

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    I Don't Mean To But I'm Afraid Of What I'll Do Otherwise.

    Like many other people (because what's wrong with being a truthful cliché?,) I just want to be held and loved for being who I am. But I don't want to push people away by even attempting to express that wanting. I doubt it would do any good, anyway. Whatever -_-
    p1nkmatter p1nkmatter 22-25 Oct 24, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    I'm so sad right now. My mind is ok but my heart is torn apart. I have no urge to talk because I barely feel alright. I'm just waiting it out till it goes away. I could use some...
    christasocal1 christasocal1 22-25 3 hrs ago

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    I've always loved the sound and feel of my own heart beating, whether it's slowly, softly beating at rest as it sustains my life or rapidly and powerfully slamming against my chest...
    alphaomega95 alphaomega95 18-21, F 10 hrs ago

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    Why don't you care about me? What is so wrong with me? What do I have to change about myself to get you to stay? Why did you do this to me? Why did you act like you liked me, if...
    iSpyce iSpyce 26-30, F 3 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    There are numerous older men in the world who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to...
    kimcc11 kimcc11 26-30, F 1 day ago

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    It's funny how you care for someone so much and then all the sudden they stop talking to you. Your heart finally healed and you're able to move on but of the blue they message you...
    regina27 regina27 26-30, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I have been to Luxor and Karnac (Egypt), Candi Borobudur (Java), Angkor Wat (Cambodia), ancient buildings in Asian and European countries and they all are special places. Stone...
    marmitemicky marmitemicky 66-70, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    There are numerous older men in the world who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to...
    earthlingcc11 earthlingcc11 26-30, F 3 days ago

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    A heart that seemed once filled Now empty within Silently searching Only to find dead ends The longing The wanting The aching So magnified, during certain moments Reaching...
    HeartOfPoetry HeartOfPoetry 36-40, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    im so depressed and hurt i allowed my daughter to stay at her fathers for a month this summer and he refused to give her back i miss her so much im in so much pain i haven't seen...
    kimhassell kimhassell 16-17, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I am not a fan of kids or anything relates to babies. Now it's just got harder because the colleague, who sits next to me, is pregnant. Somehow every word comes out of her mouth is...
    backofpostcard backofpostcard 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    if I told people that I am bipolar and have PTSD from childhood traumas, and military traumas would they want to know me... Or would they politely exit stage left once they found...
    harleyblu73 harleyblu73 41-45, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I trapped my heart didn't listen didn't care what it said. shut the **** up I don't want to hurt. anger and depression settled in. for years I traded connection, peace and love for...
    bigheartsmallworld bigheartsmallworld 36-40, M 6 days ago

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    I am torn between 2 amazing women...My wife and the love of my life. I am 35 years old. I have been married now for 10 years and I have been with my wife for a total of 12 years...
    cl0udedth0ughts cl0udedth0ughts 31-35, M Aug 25

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    I don't know where Uwais has gone but I do know he took me with it. I feel as though I've dissappeared even though I can be seen. You've taken my soul with you. My breath feels...
    passingby123 passingby123 22-25, F 3 Responses Aug 24

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    I have a side of me that I don't fully embrace. I get out of control and the feelings or are so familiar. rage, trapped, hate, and nothing is working. when all come up at the same...
    bigheartsmallworld bigheartsmallworld 36-40, M Aug 23

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    Tonight I experienced the most heart break ever. The guy that I have always had a crush is now taken. I met him when I was 6 years old in kindergarten. When I first saw him he blew...
    charlottemay charlottemay 18-21, F Aug 23

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    My heart is growing a huge wall around it..
    Jayduh97 Jayduh97 18-21, F Aug 23

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    He's back so many times I have wished for him to come back so many times I prayed for the second chance to love him so many times I cried for it will never gonna happen so many...
    soyyoprincesa soyyoprincesa 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 22

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    I was looking for wallpapers, having had the same white wolf in a snowy background on my desktop for, like, two years--really, only as a placement until I found something else...
    ColdPenguin25 ColdPenguin25 22-25, M 2 Responses Aug 21

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    I divorced in Feb 2014 and although I started dating very quickly, I had already checked out of my marriage approximately 1-2 years prior, so I felt I was ok to date. I met an...
    14nolookingback 14nolookingback 36-40, F Aug 21

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    Wants to speak from the heart. Asking Heart to say what keeps burden it. But it says 'nothing' Nothing always means something. And that something is always indescribable...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Aug 21

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