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I Am Bulimic

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,047 People

    For the past few months I have been wanting to

    stop binging/purging and every so often I manage to go a day without it and then I go right back to doing it once or twice a day. I just cant not do it. I really want to be able to eat only when i'm hungry but as soon as i eat when I'm not hungry I'm like, 'Okay, crap i'm...
    EmilyClaire6 EmilyClaire6 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 24

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    Here it goes, I am 29 year old female

    and I've been bulimic for nearly 12 years now. It's always been a shameful secret I've kept and I'm feeling as I'm getting older I'm finding it harder to accomplish my gaols because of this disease. I have never received professional treatment probably because I always try and...
    maria29 maria29 26-30, F 1 Response May 13

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    I have been struggling with bulimia

    and binge eating followed by fasting for a year now. its getting so frustrating. I had a rough/exciting/ strange year full of good and bad things, hospitalization and bipolar diagnosis, rape, intense and somewhat abusive friendship with a man, money stolen from me, binge...
    heathera94 heathera94 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 30

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    insertnicknamehere insertnicknamehere 36-40, F 1 Response Feb 23, 2014

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    diectoke diectoke 18-21, F Sep 7, 2014

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    Hi This is my first time on this site

    so I just thought I'd introduce myself haha :) I'm 18 and have been suffering with bulimia for 2 years now. I have always been a very happy positive person and still am! I eat healthily but am not able to keep any food down because I get a huge sense of guilt. I purge up to 6...
    MiaLacey MiaLacey 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 26, 2014

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    There Is Hope

    I could have swore to God and all living things that I was the most miserable sap on the surface of the earth about 12 years ago. I was thick in my eating disorders and trying to finish college and probably smoking too much pot at the time... Anyway.. now, later on in life.. i...
    anadas anadas 31-35 Jul 23, 2013

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    It all started last year.

    I was asked out by my friend, this is when I was a little heavier than what I am now. Currently, I am in my sophomore year. Freshman year was the 'push' to bring me into bulimia for me, really. I was astonished why he would ask me out, I had never been asked out before, no one...
    SlateCandy SlateCandy 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 10, 2013

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    Opus

    my daily ritual consists of food, a toilet and a tooth brush. this does not mean i gag myself with a toothbrush, i just have this ruetine where i vomit all of my food, clean the toilet then brush my teeth. this has been going on four years strong now; i am 19 years old. I am...
    elizabethdoe elizabethdoe 18-21, F 3 Responses Sep 24, 2012

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    Hi... Um i wanted to know

    if anyone wanted to help me start this bulimic thing.. . Am fat frr.. Not the 100 and something pounds type but way higher like between 250-350...i know i can stop myself after i get lighter.. But diets are just not working. Please help me start... Someone.
    Regretiam Regretiam 18-21, F 9 Responses Jan 28

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    TO EVERYONE STRUGGLING WITH BULIMIA I can't

    even begin to keep up with the new stories everyday but I can share a story of hope and desire to help you all through your battles. It's only been since February 2012 that I ended my battle with bulimia/anorexia and decided to eat and do what ever I wanted whether I gained...
    Faith4869 Faith4869 22-25, F 3 Responses Dec 28, 2013

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    So here i sit, trying to throw up what I ate,

    and ended throwing up blood.
    ThatGirlR ThatGirlR 13-15, F 3 Responses Feb 5

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    2Kawaii4u 2Kawaii4u 13-15, F 1 Response Mar 12

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    Omfg! I hate myself so much right now.

    I felt like literal **** because we went to a pizza buffet place and I ate 3 cinnamon sticks, 3 pizzas and a pie. I felt fine but like 30 minutes later I was in church and I got that anxious feeling I should purge. I tried really hard to be positive and not think but it was so...
    yonnie97 yonnie97 16-17, F Dec 4, 2014

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    janke07 janke07 18-21, F 4 Responses Feb 11

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    I Hate the Feeling

    I'm 14, 5'4 and 194 it's disgusting. I hate the way I look and I'm fixing that. I don't eat. Only when I have to and when I do I head straight for the bathroom to dispose of the things I ate. I hate the feeling of my stomach begging for food. I'd rather...
    Isabellesheart Isabellesheart 18-21, F Apr 22, 2009

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    When I was 8 I suffered from anorexia,

    I recovered. But when I was in 9th grade I started with bulimia, I stopped 'cause I got scared when I saw blood, sometimes when I get nervous I do it again, but in reality I can't stop.
    justlivingitup justlivingitup 16-17, F Apr 1

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    2Kawaii4u 2Kawaii4u 13-15, F Mar 12

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    I just ate some cheese

    and feel really guilty. All I want to do is throw it back up but I can't because I had my sleeping pills with it , ugh!! >:-(
    Leteisha Leteisha 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 9, 2014

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    Have you ever experienced doing something you

    knew was bad but you cant stop doing it because it gives you comfort and reassurance? yeah, that's me and Mia (bulimia).
    jamiieeee jamiieeee 18-21, F Jan 17, 2014

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    i really want to be fit,

    but my mom just makes me eat so much. she's overweight and hates it when i seem to be controlling my food, so she makes me eat a lot of food. i don't want to become fat! i hate eating all of this food. she doesn't want me to be fit. so i've resorted to throwing up what i can. i...
    anonymousjuly anonymousjuly 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Just wondering how often you binge/purge

    and what shape your teeth are in?
    EmilyClaire6 EmilyClaire6 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 29

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    Well. It's been a tough few months.

    Stress filled months. I feel somewhat guilty in feeling so much stress, as truly my problems are not much compared to the stresses of so many others. I'm not sure what triggered it a few months back. It doesn't really matter. I just couldn't eat. If I tried, I would spit it out...
    Tico72 Tico72 41-45, F 3 Responses May 21, 2014

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    2Kawaii4u 2Kawaii4u 13-15, F 1 Response Mar 9

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    Threw Up Blood...What Do I Do?

    I'm a bit freaked out... I just threw up blood for the first time. I've been bulimic a bit over 2 years now (after being anorexic for 4 years) and I have been purging 2-3x a day for the past 3 months. As I was purging my dinner, thankfully at the end of my purge, my throat hurt...
    dancer4444 dancer4444 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 23, 2013

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    You Won't Do This Again

    That's what I tell myself every time I find myself there, huddled in the corner of the bathroom. I know I should probably get up and brush my teeth. I've heard all the horror stories of what throwing up can do to you. That scares me too. Not enough to make me quit. Instead I just...
    KnaveOfClubs KnaveOfClubs 18-21, M 2 Responses Jan 8, 2013

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    This is incredibly embarrassing to me; I will

    probably reconsider posting this many times while writing it. I have always been very weight conscious, sometimes I don't leave the house when I gain weight. I have called out of work because I didn't want people to see me that day. I've missed parties, weddings, funerals, and...
    AshleyJea AshleyJea 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 28

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    A Fraction Of Introduction

    04/22/10 I've restarted this story several times from several different angles. Maybe I should start out small and work my way up. I don't want to pressure myself to make this perfect right now, but one upcoming night the mood will be just right to tell my story the way I...
    LancyG LancyG 18-21, F Apr 22, 2010

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    I don't want to be bulimic anymore.

    But I do. But I don't. Uggg. It's messing up my health. I have a constant sore throat even though I haven't purged in two days and it only gets worse when I eat. My stomach is bloated if I eat anything even a cracker. My teeth are transparent and very sensitive. My skin is...
    yonnie97 yonnie97 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2014

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    Recovery. My Battle Against Bully-mia.

    I am a bulimic. I am also a type one diabetic. I went to treatment at UCLA for two months. It helped but bulimia isn't something that just goes away. Bulimia isn't glamorous at all, although some people make it out to be like that. Bulimia isn't what people do to just "lose...
    meowrissa meowrissa 16-17 1 Response Jan 11, 2013

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    Well, I was for years

    but I've really changed my life for the better to a healthy lifestyle. It wasn't easy. I got lucky. Sometimes I do have the urge to revert when I have degrading thoughts of how I could be so much smaller and how 3-4 days a week of exercise isn't enough, but then I remember I'm a...
    twisteduniverse twisteduniverse 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 3

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    I Am Bulimia

    It gives me a high, a sense of accomplishment. Food is evil. Throwing up is like throwing out all the evil, it's like all bad energy is leaving your body, you feel refreshed and new. people say bulimia is like a prison or like a hell, but bulimia is my heaven. Hell is eating...
    abbywhitaker abbywhitaker 18-21, F 8 Responses Apr 2, 2010

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    Had a sandwich really late.

    Felt immense anger at myself. Couldn't purge. Physically wouldn't work. Strange. But stranger still found myself cursing at myself that "you won". But really in the battle I DID WIN. Maybe by default. But in the scheme of life I won. But in my head I didn't win. I wanted it to...
    Tico72 Tico72 41-45, F 2 Responses Jun 24, 2014

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    today I purged twice.

    I hope its helping
    2Kawaii4u 2Kawaii4u 13-15, F Mar 26

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    I'm fine.

    It's been a week since I was last sick..... I'm feeling okay, so all's looking good. I think it's going to stop because of what I did to myself last weekend. I realized how bad it made my depression when I was doing it.  It lasted for probably about...
    Achilles1989 Achilles1989 22-25, M 2 Responses Apr 19, 2009

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    There...I admitted it.

    It really just started. I need out, but I have so little willpower. I feel so alone 24/7 and DESPISE myself half the time. Anyone who wants to talk, I'd appreciate it. Either leave a comment or pm me, please. Thanks in advance.
    kitt7 kitt7 18-21 2 Responses Mar 16

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    2Kawaii4u 2Kawaii4u 13-15, F 1 Response Mar 9

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    My Secret

    I was introduced to the world of modeling and pagents at the age of 10. It was at the age of eleven that I began forcing myself to throw up. Being told that your arms are "too chubby" for the runway show that you have been trying so hard to book is devistating. Growing up...
    jrctahoe jrctahoe 18-21 6 Responses May 18, 2011

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    Me And My Mia

    Mia took over my life at 12, an early developer, I had curves that I just did not want. Mia was easy for me. I didn't eat at school, and since my mum worked a lot, I could easily eat dinner and throw it up. No one noticed a thing. I beat Mia at 14 after passing out once too many...
    LJ160491 LJ160491 18-21 Oct 22, 2011

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    Over the past 12 hours I have eaten 3/4 of an

    ice cream cake my roommate got me for my birthday, then threw it up while drunk in the shower and she walked in and thank god didn't notice because she was just going to the bathroom. Then I woke up and went for a 25 mile bike ride, and went to an all-you-can eat buffet that was...
    Ma1821 Ma1821 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 26, 2014

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    I don't eat. When I do I always throw it up.

    I'm so upset because of what everyone was saying, about something I worked really hard on. Everyone thinks I'm just a loser well because I am. But it's my sisters birthday so lots of people are going out to dinner. I have to go. Idk how I'm going to throw up what I eat unless I...
    torijoy torijoy 13-15, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    deleted deleted 26-30 May 15

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    I need help. I purge every time I feel gross.

    Even if I didn't binge. If I weigh too much one day I will restrict food until I break down and binge then I purge it all. If someone says something mean to me I purge. I know it's gonna start being really bad for my health but I can't stop
    novayeah novayeah 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 27

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    I think I am bulimic.

    I'm 14 years old and a female. I'm 5'2 and 126 lbs. I have the tendency to check my weight every 3 hours or so, i dont really keep track but I can tell you this much, I usually go to the scale 5 or 6 times a day, I practically live there. Also I have tried once to induce...
    Yasminemorales Yasminemorales 13-15, F 2 Responses Feb 21

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    I am an Addict. I love the feeling in my throat

    when food comes out. I love the feeling of my heart pounding; the tears that roll down my cheeks. I love how cold my body gets after an hour of throwing up, I love the cold. I am Addicted and I can't stop. No, I won't stop. and that's the problem. I just love it too much.
    jamiieeee jamiieeee 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 18, 2014

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    Three weeks ago i started to purge again.

    I was 123.4 pounds and my boyfriend wanted me to start taking birth control pills. I've read online that birth control can make women gain weight so i started to purge. I am currently 111.6lbs and i want to lose more! my boyfriend is coming down in 16 days and his birthday is on...
    jamiieeee jamiieeee 18-21, F Dec 3, 2014

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