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I Am Childless By Choice

A board for folks who choose to not have children 352 People

    My Marriage Is Failing Because I Don't Want Children

    I have been married for almost 8 years to the most wonderful man in the world. I am American and he is English and we live in England. I knew from a very early age that I never wanted to have kids and I have always been up front about this. If you ask anyone in my world; family...
    NYCGal2010 NYCGal2010 31-35, F 6 Responses May 1, 2010

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    I Love My Child Free Life

    My earliest memory of not wanting children was a discussion with a friend in my high school science class... we were discussing the tv series party of five & how the main character had broken up with his girlfriend because she didn't want children. I was horrified...why would he...
    Chrisannb Chrisannb 31-35 4 Responses Mar 5, 2013

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    Final Decision

    After vacillating over this for years, I've finally decided that, due to my limited patience and need for more alone time than a child will allow me to have, I am never having children. My freedom means so much more to me than raising up a human being who may or may not be...
    DreamsOfNight DreamsOfNight 31-35, F 1 Response May 4, 2012

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    Misleading Commercials

    Many years ago, there was a television commercial for a flu medication with this premise: A married straight couple with an infant. The woman is in bed, sicker than sick with the flu, the man is healthy. The baby becomes his complete responsibility, and he is overwhelmed...
    Samantha535 Samantha535 13-15, F 10 Responses Nov 24, 2009

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    Childfree--no Kidding!

    I have been widowed for three years, am in my late 50s. My late wife and I had a very wonderful marriage with no children. In the year and a half I have been looking, I have found the number of childless single women in the 35-49 age group (the target group from which I would...
    Freekorps Freekorps 56-60, M 2 Responses May 24, 2013

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    I Knew When I Was 15 I Did Not Want To Be A Mom

    I was married when I was 20, he was a jerk and I knew he would not make a good father.  We divorced.  I got married again at 30, he spent all his time at work (he was an Engineer) so I knew no time for a baby.  My sister had her child at 30 right after she got...
    gigi1982 gigi1982 46-50 2 Responses Nov 17, 2010

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    Not Entirely By Choice, But Mostly.

    I am currently childless by choice. At one point, I was talked into trying to get pregnant, but thankfully my body didn't play along. It's not to say I don't like kids. I work as a nanny. I love kids. It's more like I don't trust a man enough to have children with him at the...
    amikety amikety 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 17, 2012

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    A Second Home

    When I got married, oh so many years ago, one thing I was worried about was building a family. With what I had been through as a child and where I was at the time, I didn't want to bring any more children into the world. I had spent my early teens helping my mother raise younger...
    silentwriter180 silentwriter180 41-45, F Mar 17, 2012

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    Jaw Dropper

    I actually had a family doctor (a man) who told me that until I have a child, I am not truly and fully a woman. I changed doctors. And this was only 12 years ago.  I wanted my tubes tied when I was 34 years old because I knew I didn't want children.  I had a...
    thinkingoutloud thinkingoutloud 46-50, F 14 Responses Mar 24, 2008

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    And I Intend to Keep It That Way...

    Don't get me wrong, I actually like kids...I just don't want any. Never have. But most importantly, I just don't see my life taking that particular road. Honestly, I've already helped to raise my siblings...they still call me mom by accident sometimes... and I don't feel like I...
    vinividivici21 vinividivici21 22-25, F 5 Responses Apr 19, 2008

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    I Have No Children

    In my family there wer 4 children two boys and two girls. We had a pretty good life growing up in the 50's and 60's. My father was the breadwinner and my mother was busy raising the children. Occassionally my mother had part time jobs. We were raised in the catholic church. At...
    steve824 steve824 56-60 2 Responses Feb 25, 2009

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    Childless By Choice

    Childless by choice,That's me,This world,I'm not a fan,My Question,Why bring a child,Into a place,You don't like yourself?
    lazycrazybasket lazycrazybasket 46-50, M Mar 17, 2012

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    Children? No Way!

    I don't like kids. They're a snot nosed brats who don't listen to their parents. I chose not to have kids and people annoy the heck out of me when they apologize to me that I can't have kids. There is nothing to be sorry about. I don't want the responsibility of raising one. I...
    noaht43 noaht43 41-45, T 1 Response Oct 27, 2012

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    Just Not For Me

    I remember at a young age saying I wasnt going to get married and I didn't want kids. Well I got married to a stone cold man. We are now getting a divorce. I should have went with my gut feelings and never got married. Everyday I feel like I'm bombarded with the notion that I...
    Swayaway34 Swayaway34 22-25, F Aug 10, 2012

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    Childless Singles...

    Does anyone know any "Childless Singles Dating Website" ? If you do please please let me know....
    haveadrink haveadrink 41-45, F 3 Responses Sep 26, 2011

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    My Mom's Advice

    When I was about 10 years old, my mom sat me down and told me "don't ever have kids, they really mess up your life".  Mom always did have a way with words.  She continued...."I love you kids, I really do, but I want you to realize how much having kids...
    MaMegabyte MaMegabyte 51-55, F 2 Responses May 24, 2008

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    Kids Are Not For Me

    I am really not cut out to be a parent i believe. My two older sisters have 3 kids each and I have cousins that have 4 kids. Our family has so many kids that i know enough that i don't want to be around them at all. I see three of my nieces everyday (My Mom watches them...
    alwaysalone alwaysalone 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 19, 2008

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    Don’t get me wrong.

    I thought about having kids (But on a gut level, I just didn’t want to get pregnant) in particular in SE Asia developing nations. In the developing country like Thailand, where a future child/children may grow up 'SO COMPETITIVELY' in an unfair, inadequate welfares...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jan 6

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    Because I Know What It Feels Like...

    I haven't really been able to express the reason that I am (currently, & most likely will continue to be) choosing to be childless, to anybody in the "real world". I certainly haven't felt that I am able to explain it to my parents, who would feel exceptionally hurt...
    borntolove borntolove 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 23, 2008

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    Childless & Happy

    My decision to not have children came at an early age (25) partly as a result of a failed 1st marriage and circumstances that were not conducive to being a focused, dedicated parent. I did not want: to bring a child into an unstable marriage, to be a single parent, or to have a...
    RavenLee RavenLee 46-50, F 3 Responses Feb 9, 2008

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    Tired of Making Excuses Why Not

    I'm so tired of being looked at like a freak of nature because I don't want children.  I'm also tired of being the only one in my group that doesn't want children.  Talk about feeling so alone.  Does anyone feel left behind though?  I know I don't want...
    trustnoone77 trustnoone77 36-40, F 8 Responses Jun 25, 2009

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    Right now I choose to be childless.

    Maybe I will change my mind later. My parents did foster care and I had many bad experiences with children to ever want them. I just don't understand why everyone keeps telling me my life is incomplete or that I'm selfish. It's not my duty to give society children.
    Rebecca321 Rebecca321 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 18

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    Is It Wrong Not To Have Children?

    I’m a 45 year old childless man. My Chinese brother in law refers to me as: “An empty branch.” He means no offence and there’s none taken; that’s just how he sees me – it’s a cultural thing. I knew from a very young age that I would have no progeny – probably as...
    gerardfsmith gerardfsmith 41-45, M 11 Responses Dec 1, 2010

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    I Choose To Leave The Childbearing To Others.

    I, seriously,  want to say "God Bless You!" to those women/men (single or married) who want to bear/adopt/raise children.  I include single women who are financially able to bear and raise a child or two.  In response to the EP member who made a nasty comment about couples...
    fonna fonna 46-50, F Jul 9, 2011

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    I'll Teach Them, But Not Raise Them!

    I'm a teacher who will not be having children. I realized a little over a year ago that I'm just not called to motherhood. In my young adult group last year, we wrote mission statements for our lives.  The moderator of our group gave us a great deal of deep guiding...
    flamencocat flamencocat 26-30, F 2 Responses May 3, 2010

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    I am childless by choice

    and proud. I have thought about having children, my own as well as adoption, but I quickly realized that a child just would not fit into my lifestyle. I am current in a relationship where both of us are self-employed. I cannot imagine either one of us cutting back on work...
    tryx4us tryx4us 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 6

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    Zero Regrets

    For those of you who chose parenthood, you have my deepest respect.  It's got to be the hardest job in the world.  Even when I was a child, I knew I did not want to have children.  The only role model that I had--even though both sides of the family were large...
    IAmStillSomeone IAmStillSomeone 41-45, F 11 Responses Jun 23, 2009

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    No Desire For Children Whatsoever

    I'm sure other people who are like me have gotten this - a lot of times when you express disdain for having children of your own, the response is complete confusion or repulsion. They either just cannot figure out how in the world you could possibly not want a child of your own...
    SpilledSecrets SpilledSecrets 22-25, F 9 Responses Jan 27, 2011

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    Not Sorry

    I never really liked children.  As an only child, I have no experiance with them.  I never went babysitting as a teen.  I never felt the pressure to reproduce.  Especially when I see how many unwanted children there are in this world (I was one of them). ...
    AyeAye AyeAye 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 20, 2008

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    Thoughts

    Well here goes.   When I was in my 20's I had it all planned.  A career, marriage and children (2) by the time I was 35.  Well none of that happened.  My would-be career at the time went into the toilet and I'm not married (yet) although someday I want to be.   I often...
    starlett2010 starlett2010 36-40, F 1 Response Dec 19, 2010

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    My husband and I are childless by choice.

    I was hoping to find some couples to hang out with on the weekends with similar interests. I have not been able to find them yet. We have recently moved to a new state and I work from home so it is hard to meet new people at all. When I do go out every one I meet has kids...
    aly3636 aly3636 31-35, F 6 Responses Apr 2

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    Chosen At Many Points In the Past, and the Evolution of the Reason.

    Over time, many reasons for this choice have come and gone. I was accutely aware of the problems that can accompany having a child when one is not financially ready. Years later, when I began traveling more, the main reason was that I didn't want my children to have to transplant...
    FluidMind FluidMind 31-35, M 2 Responses Apr 25, 2008

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    Anxiety

    I have known since I can remember that I did not want children. I did not play house, I played school with my dolls. I'm the youngest, so I did not spend time with babies. I babysat because that's what girls did to earn money. I liked the older kids, but truly could not stand the...
    mosherkm mosherkm 31-35 3 Responses Jul 12, 2010

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    Circumstances Beyond My Control

    I'm not sure if this qualifies as childless by choice, but....My husband and will be married for 5 years this year. 3 years ago, he was hurt at work (construction) and has had lumbar back surgery, neck injections, nerve damage, etc.  Anyway, we are in our early 40s and...
    ParisDaisy ParisDaisy 41-45 1 Response Apr 4, 2010

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    Selfish

      A couple of weeks ago I had a meaningful conversation with my younger brother.  This is not unusual, as my younger brother and I have always been compatible personalities and throughout most of our lives have found comfort in the camaraderie we share.  Don't...
    sarahladybug28 sarahladybug28 36-40, F Sep 29, 2009

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    I keep my legs shut. It's not

    that hard. I'm not ready for kids I never will be.
    REALWORDS823 REALWORDS823 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 23

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    Selfish

      A couple of weeks ago I had a meaningful conversation with my younger brother.  This is not unusual, as my younger brother and I have always been compatible personalities and throughout most of our lives have found comfort in the camaraderie we share.  Don't...
    sarahladybug28 sarahladybug28 36-40, F 2 Responses Sep 29, 2009

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    Having Too Much Fun

    I always expected to have children.  After all, isnt that how life works?  You get married, have children.... Well, I would say the biggest thing that prevented me from having children was meeting the right woman.  I didn't meet my wife till we were in our 30s...
    jasonk jasonk 41-45 2 Responses Dec 14, 2008

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    Yessiree

    Some trees are meant to be chopped down. My family's is one of them. Both my sibling and I don't want kids; our parents are fine with it. Not that we need their permission to not reproduce.I think I have made the most unselfish choice to not bring a child into this miserable...
    notthis78 notthis78 31-35, F 3 Responses Oct 19, 2013

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    I am the only living child of a woman

    who should have NEVER been allowed to raise children. She was the "cool aunt"(read as too busy chasing ****&spending money&living like there was no tomorrow to actually raise the nephew she took in),but a God AWFUL mother!My paternal grandparents raised me instead when my father...
    Mykelle Mykelle 22-25 1 Response May 9

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    Not A Satistic

    I refuse to have any kind of romantic relationship or children until I have graduated from dental school. I have goals and while children could be in my future someday at this point I'm not really fussed. Besides I have 10 siblings and 14 nieces and nephews. I can always borrow a...
    wolfcon wolfcon 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 22, 2011

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    Effed Up Genetics

    Nature-nurture be damned; I know full well that insanity runs in my family.  So even if I wasn't worried about the kidney disease, heart trouble, lung issues, diabetes, and cancer that runs rampant in my gene pool I'd be cautious.I know of two full-blown sociopaths in my parents...
    Plaid Plaid 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 2, 2011

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    Parasite Free

    I've never wanted children, and I really doubt that I ever will. It's a totally irrational choice people make not for themselves, but to fulfill a biological imperative which serves the purpose of the species (which, like all life, is to replicate indefinitely) at the expense of...
    Phage Phage 26-30, F 23 Responses Sep 28, 2009

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    The Same, Only Different

    I see some people have mentioned that they get asked when they will start having children, which is a tactless question to begin with. When you're married to a same-sex partner, you get the question even more, I think. I have no problem telling people that we don't want children...
    SunnieDelite SunnieDelite 31-35, T 4 Responses Apr 12, 2009

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    Not For Me !

    I grew up in asingle parent home , with 2 other siblings we were always broke never had anyfun and always hated each other because are house was so small !My mom was always stuck at home and she didnt go out because she could never find a babysitter ! I like kids and all but i...
    HappilyTheOtherWoman HappilyTheOtherWoman 18-21 2 Responses Mar 17, 2009

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    I Don't Feel I Am Missing Anything ...

    I don't understand the reason for having children, truly I don't.  I imagine that alot of people who hear me say this think I am cold and unfeeling.  It's not that I don't enjoy my nieces and nephews when I am around them - I do, but God, am I ready to go home after a...
    legalsexy legalsexy 36-40, F 5 Responses Feb 21, 2008

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    Married 14+ Years Now and Absolutely No Regrets

    My wife and I married nearly 15 years ago. Every since I can remember I did not want/need children. Most people would tell me (years ago) that i would change my mind--not so. We love the lifestyle that the freedom allows. We get to be as selfish as we want without harming a...
    qff35 qff35 41-45, M 5 Responses Feb 6, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    Wow, I'm a 52 yr old woman soon to be 53 and no children. Just like so many of us on here I am bitter and wish so badly for a child even at this age. Not going to happen I suppose...
    Texxy Texxy 51-55, F 1 Response Jul 8

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    My heart aches.....I am 36 years old, doing well professionally and miserable because I don't have the family that I always assumed I would have. I have always loved children and...
    jenna778 jenna778 36-40, F 2 days ago

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    Childless stepmom to a 9, almost 10, year old boy. My boyfriend and I started dating at 14. We were on/off for 17 years. At 22, he had a fling, and ended up with a child. His mom...
    CBradio0903 CBradio0903 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 12

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    I get so sick and tired of anti choice people saying that pro choice means pro death or pro abortion. No it does not. Choice is what it is... You support a woman's decision. That's...
    Inherownwords Inherownwords 31-35, F 8 Responses Jul 1

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    I am pro choice. I am also a Christian/Catholic. Some would say that I am not a real Christian because I am pro choice. Where exactly in the bible, does it say that its a sin to be...
    Inherownwords Inherownwords 31-35, F 5 Responses Jul 4

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    She is responsible for that fetus she's carrying. Whatever choice she makes, she will have to live with it for the rest of her life. Only she knows her body better than anybody...
    Inherownwords Inherownwords 31-35, F 1 Response