I Am Dating a Widower

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 235 People

    I've been dating my widower

    for over three years, and the late wife has been gone for nearly seven. We even moved in together because he said that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Now, though, he's not sure. He has said variations of the fact that he doesn't love me the way he loved her...
    nevereverenough nevereverenough
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Mar 26, 2015

    10yeargap.com focuses on younger women dating

    older men and it encourages age gap marriage. 10YearGap.com is not a sugar daddy site. Single women are attracted to older single men as they are polite, respectful, generous, kind, intelligent, sensitive, caring, affectionate, and understanding. Many younger women would like to...
    JessieFay JessieFay
    31-35, F
    Dec 2, 2014

    I really feel the need to share my story.

    It's such a long one, though, that I need to spend some time getting it all down and in the right order. I will start with introducing myself. I am a divorced 46 year old, mother of 2 boys, who has been in a romantic relationship with a widower going on 8 years. He lost his 40...
    BlueLotusOM BlueLotusOM
    46-50, F
    Jun 24, 2015

    it is such a relief to read the stories of

    other women dating widowers. It is so hard hearing how 'wonderful' the late wife and their life together was and I am the one who has to be sympathetic and understanding when he is sad, which he is happy to tell everyone about. I am made to feel so second rate and marginalised...
    Elberfeld Elberfeld
    61-65, F
    4 Responses May 31, 2015

    Social Media ...Us...This Life.

    My w still has his late wife's picture as his profile picture on Facebook. I know it shouldnt but it absolutely is driving me crazy.. is there a right way to ask him to change this? Another problem is that his late wife's family knows about me yet he still won't post a photo of...
    notautumn notautumn
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Nov 13, 2013

    I am new to this and have been dating a widower

    for about three months. We were acquaintances because our daughter are friends. When our daughters had met his LW had already been very ill and I met her very briefly. Aside from a passing hello he and I did not know each other and did not really meet until about 6 weeks after...
    falling444 falling444
    36-40, F
    1 Response Sep 18, 2015

    Hi everyone. I'm seeking some encouragement.

    I'm dating a man who lost his wife 4 months ago. I did not know him or his wife before she passed. I've never been in a situation like this before... though I'm open and willing to see where it takes me. I'm feeling a little scared and vulnerable about it at the moment. Though...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses May 2, 2015

    I have been dating a widower

    for the last year and a half. His late wife passed away 2yrs ago this month. He swears he loves me but admits he is still grieving. His 42 year old daughter still has a problem with him dating. His other kids are fine with us. During Christmas the shrine went back up and...
    alishas alishas
    51-55, F
    3 Responses Feb 18, 2014

    I met a man a few months ago

    and we are absolutely crazy about each other. We spend all of our time together. It has almost been a year since his wife has died and he has not got rid of her clothes and her presence is still very much in his home. He treats me like gold and doesn't spend his time talking...
    sbablitz sbablitz
    51-55, F
    2 Responses Mar 15, 2016

    Treading Lightly In Limbo

    I knew this widower and his wife socially through community events for many years. We knew she was sick with cancer,and working through her "bucket list", but her death three years ago, at age 49 was still a surprise. I have been alone without a relationship for 10 years...
    Pavanian Pavanian
    51-55, F
    Sep 23, 2013

    Hi hope someone can offer me some guidance.

    I am a single mum to 5 kids and met my widower bf online 3 months ago. His lw only passed away in jan this year, after a battle with cancer. He was with her for 12 years and they had no kids. We met online and charted for a while before meeting and we both hit it off instantly...
    Coconutvodka Coconutvodka
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Jul 19, 2015

    Thank you all for sharing you experiences.

    It truly has helped me, its nice to know that im not alone. Dating a widower is hard, its not for everyone, and not everyone can do this. I believe that you need to have an open mind and a open heart to be able to withstand the pressure. But im far from perfect, and I have been...
    EstStella EstStella
    22-25, F
    Jun 8, 2015

    Hello there. I'm 35 and am in a fairly new

    relationship with a widower. His wife died after a long battle with cancer a year and a half ago. He has two teenage sons. Things are going really well so far, and I can see myself spending my life with this man. But there are so many emotional issues I'm dealing with. No one in...
    ViolinKat ViolinKat
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Sep 13, 2015

    I started dating a widower

    after his wife of 15yrs. pass 7months ago. He is 45 me 37. First time we met he was wearing his wedding ring. I told him he was mot ready. He knew i wanted to make a run for it. I kept my cool and decided to make the most if it. It's only been the first month but all the good...
    kimo125 kimo125
    41-45, F
    1 Response Mar 19, 2014

    I met my w two months

    after his wife died, my dad passed away around the same time..so we kind of had "something"in common...His wife passed after a long illness shortly after giving birth to thier 4th child. He had always said she was a "big B" and the relationship probably would have ended in...
    looloop looloop
    41-45, F
    1 Response Jul 2, 2015

    I'm so scared because we started dating

    and all this is new for me. He lost his wife 2 years ago. He has 3 kids. He drives 2 hours almost everyday to see me. Everything seems good. We slept together and it was good for both of us. I'm just scared of loosing him because I'm falling in love.
    yaya9801 yaya9801
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Feb 8, 2015

    PART II: The first year I dated my W

    “secretively”, as he wasn’t comfortable being seen with me in public. He also didn’t want his teenage boys to know that his father was moving on with his life. So instead, we would go out on dates in towns 30-50 miles away where we could be anonymous. We would...
    BlueLotusOM BlueLotusOM
    46-50, F
    Jun 24, 2015

    The Widower I Want To Woo Me...

    We met on Match.com and have been dating for two months. He lost his wife just six months ago after a 2 1/2 year battle with cancer. We are both in our 50's. He has been attentive, reliable, treats me with respect and kindess. We've shared many belly laughs together and we both...
    shesgotmoxie shesgotmoxie
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Nov 27, 2012

    New relationship. I am a divorcee - terrible

    marriage. Had one real relationship since. Love of my life he was, but it ended in tragic circumstances. Now I am met a widower recently. I don't date casually and this guy like me was looking for a long term relationship. We clicked and so far we are going well. From...
    waytoosad waytoosad
    3 Responses Jul 8, 2014

    I'm new and confused

    as to which way to go... I met my widower 19 months, he'd been a widower for a year. He said he was ready for a relationship but still to this day I don't think he is. We have lots fun together and it's as though we've know each other for years. The reason I don't think he's...
    lovesflowerstoo lovesflowerstoo
    56-60, F
    1 Response Dec 23, 2015

    I started dating a widower

    that I met on a relationship website. I didn't give much thought to what dating a widower could potentially mean when the relationship began. On our first date over coffee, I asked him how long his wife had been gone (I'm no stranger to grief and tragedy, so I felt very...
    deleted deleted
    May 25, 2014

    Hi there. Just need a litlle insight

    and advice. My widower and I are discussing moving together full time but his concern his son. His Son is 20 years old away at college and comes home summers and holidays. We have been together over 6 months and his son refuses to meet me. We cant move on in our relationship...
    tgayle tgayle
    46-50, F
    1 Response May 18, 2015

    Hey all I want to share my experiences of

    dating a widower........ When I found out the man I was talking to was a widower I have to admit I was scared I wasn't strong enough and when I found out how little time had passed since her passing I thought the only option was walking away, but I didn't and I'm so glad but I...
    Becky1711 Becky1711
    36-40, F
    1 Response Apr 15, 2015


    HurtfulPosted January 6th, 2012 at 8:36PM I have no idea on how to start this. I got caught up in the midlle of something and I have no idea how to deal with it. I do not know anyone who has ever been in a similar situation, so I have been wondering in internet foruns and...
    sofiampsgjorge sofiampsgjorge
    3 Responses Jan 6, 2012

    I dated a widower for about 3 years.

    When we met he'd finished a 4 year relationship after his LW, as well as internet dating with quite a few women and then that's how we met. As I understand he and LW they'd had a long happy marriage and been together for over 20 years since his mid 20s'. They had two children...
    Salmoncakes Salmoncakes
    1 Response Sep 15, 2014

    Dating A Widower And Confused.

    I've been dating a widower for 8 months now.  His wife died three years ago.  I knew him and his wife 23 years ago.  A mutual friend brought us to "re-meet"   We were both happy to reconnect.  He got in touch with me often, and we started dating.  About a month into it, I...
    nista nista
    2 Responses May 6, 2012

    Get out while you still have your integrity

    and before the widower crushes your hopes and dreams. I spent 10 months giving him companionship through the winter and being there on his down days. Today I was told he did not know if he could love someone again -- I've read many stories about the first woman a widower dates...
    hereathome hereathome
    51-55, F
    2 Responses Jun 8, 2014

    Hello, if you are dating a widower here are the

    signs to watch for that they are NOT ready to move on. I am speaking from a very recent experience dating a widower for 8 months (I broke it off 2 days ago - he is not ready to be in a true 100% relationship like what I want). His late wife passed 13 years ago, he had a brief...
    nowiunderstand nowiunderstand
    61-65, F
    6 Responses Jan 2, 2014

    I'm new to this site

    and I actually created this account because of a group I saw similar to this one. I don't know what to call my partner he wasn't married but he lost his long term partner in a car accident May 2014. and we began dating April 2015. Our relationship is complicated, we've been...
    Beyondie Beyondie
    22-25, F
    1 Response Oct 30, 2015

    Til Death Do You Part..and Then For All Eternity

    Ten years ago I met a widower who's wife of 18 years had died the previous year. He had two sons. One was in high school the other was away at college. I wasn't too interested in him at first, no love at first sight for me. But he was persistent and eventually we started dating...
    JustJanJ JustJanJ
    46-50, F
    3 Responses Mar 15, 2012

    A Win For The Home Team!

    Today my W is changing his profile picture on Facebook. All I had to do was ask! Thank goodness. I also had a great night with his kiddos I came home early from work and got lots of love from them! Today was a good day folks!! Well that's all for now. I will write more after the...
    notautumn notautumn
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Nov 27, 2013

    Hi, I have known my widower 3 years now.

    I met him 8 months after his wife passed from cancer. We met on a dating site a few months after dating he told me he was not ready and called things off. We did not talk for a few months but some may think this is weird his wife or a vision of his wife looking like one of...
    sassynsweet4 sassynsweet4
    41-45, F
    May 31, 2014

    I met my widower a little over five months ago

    on a dating site, and we have been dating ever since. I admit that I was surprised to learn, shortly after we began dating, that his late wife had passed away only a little less than 5 minutes earlier. He has been very sweet and attentive. He calls me EVERY night, without fail...
    Loveawidower Loveawidower
    56-60, F
    1 Response Jan 29, 2014

    Made It Through Yesterday, Fell Asleep In My Mans Arms

    Well we made it through the anniversary and today is a new day. things were complicated and messy and we had a break down Saturday. I know these things are hard for the widdower but I think people rarely consider the new gf or bf . It was hard on all of us! He cleaned out her...
    notautumn notautumn
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Oct 30, 2013

    I have been dating a widower

    for almost a year now. We met online, took things very slowly, it was almost a month of texting before we even talked on the phone. We were both married for over 15 years, so this is new to both of us even though our situations are different. His wife was killed in an...
    Hamilton358 Hamilton358
    Dec 8, 2015

    Getting Started....

    Well, I have been researching for days the ins and outs of dating a widower. I am a divorced mother of four girls who hasn't had much luck dating. Mainly because I am wounded and picky. And then I met him. And I thought "I'm in trouble". He is everything I have been looking...
    PawleysGirl PawleysGirl
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Apr 2, 2013

    I met a widower online 3 months ago.

    We hit it off immediately and we started spending lots of time together. I rarely let men I'm just dating on my FN page but i did him. I had looked at his FB page and he had written a tribute to his LW, which I thought was sweet. The second time we went out I noticed he was...
    rannel rannel
    51-55, F
    6 Responses Feb 1, 2014

    I am 48 years old, divorced,

    with two children (son, 18, and daughter, 16). Their father and I share joint physical and legal custody. A little over a year ago, I met widower, 56, whose wife died four years ago after an 18-month battle with cancer. Widower has four children (daughter, 25, lives at home...
    amyinindiana amyinindiana
    46-50, F
    Mar 28, 2016

    I'm engaged to a widower.

    His wife took her own life. As we get closer to our wedding day, we also get closer to the anniversary of her death and birthday. I've been hearing a lot more about her lately, which I know is normal as dates come up, but I also feel like it's taking away from our special day...
    1kindredspirit 1kindredspirit
    46-50, F
    1 Response Aug 25, 2015

    Good News! - I Am Happily Dating A Widower!

    When I first joined this group, I was confused and had some questions about my situation. I was eager to meet others who had some incite on dating widowers. I didn't expect to see so many horror stories, so much baaaaad news. Things are really looking up in my relationship now...
    toni72 toni72
    36-40, F
    12 Responses Apr 9, 2012

    Over the last two years,

    I wrote a few posts (less than five) about my experience dating my friend's widower. My dear friend and I grew up together. She quite suddenly and tragically died while giving birth to her second child. I wrote earlier about how her husband and I began a relationship just a few...
    FireFlare FireFlare
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jul 31, 2015

    Recently met a wonderful man.

    He approached me. His wife passed almost 2 months ago and we have been talking and seeing each other. I am concerned he is going too fast but who am I to say. I have never been through the death of a loved one. I have been divorced for 12 years and have become very...
    Mary5062 Mary5062
    51-55, F
    2 Responses Mar 19, 2016

    Hello everyone! I have been dating a widower

    for almost 8 months now. Overall we have a great relationship and our children are crazy about each other, even his family likes me and mine likes him. I would truly call him marring material except for the fact that he is a widower and I seem to have episodes about his late...
    charity82 charity82
    31-35, M
    1 Response Apr 28, 2015

    I'm struggling a bit with my relationship.

    I have been seriously dating a wonderful man who is a widower for about a year and a half. He has a daughter from his wife (now 5yo), and the wife passed away from cancer when their daughter was about 18 months old. I couldn't have hoped for a better partner and beautiful...
    jenvk jenvk
    36-40, F
    1 Response Feb 15, 2016

    I've found all your comments really helpful

    thank you! Dating a widower who regularly tells me about his wife am I wrong in also wanting to be a wife rather than just his partner? Somehow I feel I'm not as important to him because I'm only his partner. Inreally want to marry him. I would value your view and also how u get...
    Elberfeld Elberfeld
    61-65, F
    1 Response Jun 9, 2015

    There are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    kimcc11aa kimcc11aa
    26-30, F
    Jan 19, 2016

    Well im just gonna start out saying

    as im sitting here writing this I feel like my heart is already broken. I have fallen in love with a widower. She has been gone a yr nd 7months now, me and him first got together about 5 months after she passed. At first I had alot of sympathy for what had happened to him but as...
    iamn2 iamn2
    31-35, F
    6 Responses Jan 5, 2014

    I wrote previously about dating my friend's

    widower after she traumatically died giving birth to her second child. When I wrote my first post, it was just a month or so after T and I started to fall in love, and I was trying to make sense of how things could work out. It's been a year since, and so many impossible things...
    FireFlare FireFlare
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Nov 30, 2014

    I've posted a few times over the last 18 months

    about my relationship with my deceased friend's widower. One of my closest friends--with whom I grew up and went to college, lived in the same city with, had speak at my wedding, etc--died traumatically while having her second child. You can read more about the details in my...
    FireFlare FireFlare
    36-40, F
    1 Response Mar 8, 2015

    I'm Dating A Widower.....plus More!!!!

    My situation is a little different. This wonderful man in my life is a war vet and a retired police officer. He's White; I'm Black. Both American. The first few weeks of our dating experience was incredible!! He swept me off my feet, treated me like his queen, the whole nine...
    toni72 toni72
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Apr 4, 2012

    PART III: After 2 years of still being a

    secret to his boys, I realized that I wanted so much more in a relationship. I explained to him that it was obvious he isn’t ready for the commitment that I am looking for and I suggested we part ways. He begged me to give him another chance. He said he would show me that he...
    BlueLotusOM BlueLotusOM
    46-50, F
    1 Response Jun 24, 2015

    I have been in a relationship with a widower

    for the past 7 months now - he unexpectedly lost his wife to cancer in February 2014. He's 32 and I'm 26. We became close friends 6 months after she died, and we became a couple in June 2015. He's done nothing but treat me like a queen and my parents adore him - he's even...
    oursusanellen oursusanellen
    26-30, F
    Feb 15, 2016

    I have been seeing a widower

    for the last 3 months. I've described before how we got involved, but it was shortly after his wife passed away suddenly in childbirth, leaving him with a 2 year old and an infant. We were both quite overwhelmed with the intensity of our sudden feelings for each other when...
    FireFlare FireFlare
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jan 3, 2014
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