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I Am Different Since My Mother Died

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 744 People

    I lost my mother 4 weeks ago.

    I still can't believe she's gone.
    pinnkmatter pinnkmatter 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 14

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    The Pain Never Fades

    My mom died 6 years ago at the age of 49. I woke up one morning to my dad repeatedly screaming her name in the most distressed voice i've ever heard from him. I ran into their room and saw her lying in bed, looking very.. still. My dad was panicking and shook her by the shoulders...
    littlemsscientist littlemsscientist 22-25, F 5 Responses Sep 4, 2010

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    My mum was sick when i was starting university.

    I couldn't concentrate on my studies and i didn't like how she sounded when we talked on the phone. I failed the first semester and went home to see her. She had completely changed from the last time i said goodbye to her at the airport for uni. She was all skin and bones and...
    gaeainchaos gaeainchaos 22-25, F May 29

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    21 MONTHS TODAY

    My mom passed away on March , 17, 2010.  It´s been 21 months. Her absence has definitely changed me. My life is, and never will be the same without her.  If she could hear me,  I´d love to tell her this :   ..And I like to imagine these would be her words of comfort, if she...
    underconstruction underconstruction 41-45, F 15 Responses Dec 17, 2011

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    I was 10 when my mom was killed in a car

    accident then raised by my dad (parents divorced when I was 6). After she died I would feel bad for experiencing pleasure. I felt bad that she was dead and I was still alive. I'm now 39 and still have been going through therapy for various things. Part of my emotional maturity...
    infp773 infp773 36-40, M 1 Response May 3

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    I don't know, tonight I just lost it,

    someone brought the subject of mothers up. its really ****** that all we have in life is time, the only thing we calculate someone's lifeline is how long their heart beats for a minute, Its all fun and games until the old ticker or your body gives out........ We live in...
    Arizv11 Arizv11 18-21, M Jul 10

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    My mother died November last year

    when she went to visit her mother in there native country I had just made it there but I was too late we had to bury her back her native country next to her father and my dad left my 2 sisters and I and went to go back to his native country to find out his already married and...
    anthonysahin anthonysahin 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 6

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    Never Gonna Be The Same

    I was 9 years old, I remember the night perfectly. It was a Friday night, mom was tucking me in at 8:13 Pm, she had kissed me goodnight and said "Goodnight Ry-Ry my little soldier, i'll see you in the morning sweetie". I got up in the middle of the night to go to bathroom, I went...
    AnathemaOfTheSick AnathemaOfTheSick 16-17, M 6 Responses Aug 6, 2012

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    My mum died a month ago today.

    She passed unexpectedly in her sleep and my youngest brother (25) found her. My mum and I weren't close at all, too alike I guess. I am finding things really tough and struggling to keep it together as I feel guilty we didn't have a better relationship and scared that she didn...
    Footprints79 Footprints79 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 31

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    March 17,2014- Her fourth anniversary.

    It´s been 4 years since mom passed away and there isn´t a day gone by that we, Missy and I, don´t think about her, talk about her and miss her terribly. I hope she is well and happy and enjoying the company of my dad,again. I trust they are protecting us . I...
    underconstruction underconstruction 41-45, F 6 Responses Mar 17

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    My mom passed away two years ago.

    We argued a lot but she was still my best friend. She was really sick growing up so my childhood was basically in and out of the hospital. As selfish as this sounds, I was mad at her for that. I was mad at her for not giving me a chance to live a normal life. Although, when she...
    thehumbleturtle thehumbleturtle 16-17, F 3 Responses May 29

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    I Wonder

    I wonder if you would like the woman I've become, I wonder if you would like the man I chose to marry, I wonder if you know the burden I carry, I wonder if you know of the trials I have overcome, I wonder if you truly loved me, or the dna was all that tied us together, I wonder...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Dec 15, 2012

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    Sad

    My mother died of cancer 2 years ago, and I think that I am more sad as time goes by. I have heard that grief gets better with time, but I am thinking that it gets worse. I do not cry everyday anymore, but sometimes something will strike me the wrong way and I will become very...
    Bhagyawati Bhagyawati 31-35, F 6 Responses Oct 24, 2011

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    So Glad To Have Found This Site...

    I am so sorry we have suffered such profound loss. Ironically, I stumbled upon this site while researching ways to connect with those who've passed on. I loss my mother to Cancer a few years ago, and it still feels as though it happened just yesterday. I too have resorted to...
    PHL517 PHL517 26-30 1 Response Nov 19, 2013

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    She Was Truly My Only Friend.

    Everyone always tells kids and teenagers "When you grow up you'll realize your mom is your best friend."  No one ever really had to tell me that, because I had always known.    Since she died, I am alot less optimistic about life. I don't believe I can make...
    patchworkofmistakes patchworkofmistakes 26-30, F 13 Responses Mar 24, 2010

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    Since 16

    My mother died when I was 16. It was a pivotal point in my life. It was both a blessing and very much NOT blessing for me. My mother was an alcoholic, a drug addict among other things. When I was 3, my mom had leukemia. They put her on pain meds that they didn't know was...
    darktippedrose darktippedrose 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 24, 2012

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    My Mother Died When I Was 5 Years Old

    My mother died when I was five years old. She developed a headache and my father took her to the hospital... and she never came back. She died of meningitis. I felt like I was just waiting... and waiting. I didn't understand what death was and thought that if that was where my...
    DiggDigg DiggDigg 46-50, M 16 Responses Feb 17, 2011

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    My mom was my best friend

    and our lives were so intertwined . My mom had surgery and was doing well. We were to take her to rehab on Sunday May 4th and she passed away suddenly on May 3rd. We were talking one minute about how having coffee in the morning was going to her going in a Rehab, next moment...
    ac721 ac721 51-55, F 2 Responses May 31

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    Told For The First Time

    My mother went to the doctor for the first time in I don't know how long, she was tired and not eating. Thought it was blood sugar or something of that nature. She turned out to be anaemic and was sent immediately across the street to the hospital for a blood transfusion. Within...
    Dantescircle Dantescircle 36-40, M 8 Responses Oct 22, 2013

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    My mother died 2 months ago from cancer.

    I was able to be with her at home. She had inhome hospice care and was well cared for. When my mommy died I was crying out that I killed her. I dont know why I said that. I held her in my arms and kissed her. I feel like a little kid who has lost her mommy. People tell me that...
    krazyjohn krazyjohn 66-70, F 4 Responses Mar 20

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    I lost my mom 4/29/2012.

    She died suddenly at age 55. I miss her more each day. I am so lost without her. She was my best friend and my only parent. The only person I could really talk to and I knew for sure she would never judge me. Five months after losing my mom, I lost my youngest sister on 10/19...
    eightysixhim2 eightysixhim2 41-45, F 1 Response May 21

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    I was 16 when my mother got into a car accident.

    She was in a coma for 2 months before we decided to take her off life support. She was the coolest mom ever. Now I'm like desperate for motherly love, whether it be from friends parent's, or boyfriend's parents especially. I'm wondering if it's obvious that I have this void that...
    Jill0829 Jill0829 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 2

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    My Mom Just Died And My Dad Is Already Seeing Someone

    This wont be a long story. Its really just for some feedback. My Mom died Feb 2011 of breast cancer.  She and my dad had been married for 55 years. They lived in the house that I grew up in  since 1975. I understand that life has to go on, and I don't expect my dad to live...
    rockyjohnson43 rockyjohnson43 41-45, F 55 Responses Mar 25, 2011

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    Missing You...:( :( :( :(

    God looked around His garden, and found and empty place; He then looked down upon His earth, and saw your loving face. He put His arms around you, and lifted you to rest, His garden must be beautiful, He always takes His best. It's been 10 months. missing you terribly mommy. miss...
    Titan007 Titan007 22-25, M 5 Responses Jul 15, 2010

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    I Am A Different Person Since My Mom Died 2 Months Ago And Am Very Scared

    Hello and thanks for reading my story. I am a 35-year-old man who was always close with his mother. She was the light of my life since I was born. 3 years ago my father had a minor stroke and his personality changed. He and my mother became like oil and vinegar after 43 years of...
    nyc99lon09 nyc99lon09 31-35 127 Responses Nov 18, 2010

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    I miss my mother so much this time of the year.

    I miss her every day but so much right now. I know she's Okay where she is but the problem is I want to be with her more than living. it seems like there is always something pulling me down. For me It's the depression and anxiety. some days I think I'm doing Okay then...
    fragmentsoflife fragmentsoflife 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Im here because I love her,

    and im not sure what to say or do because she is so volnerable. My sister in law lost her mother when she was 6 years old my husband was 10 there father was an alcoholic for many years. She is now 30 and has a 5 yr old daughter. For the past 3 ye she has been making some...
    HopeandHeartache HopeandHeartache 31-35, F Aug 21

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    It's been 20 years since my mother died

    and I am very different from that 28 year old girl who lost her mom. I became an adult that day, found out I was much stronger than I thought I could be. Along the years, I realized that she had prepared me to face any challenge, including that of overcoming her death, she had...
    diablesse34 diablesse34 46-50, F 13 Responses Jan 24

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    I'm glad encounter this place

    because almost everybody has passing what I'm. My mother die one month ago and I cried every single day, can't take her out of my mind. She was 93 years old and I'm 70 (soon) but she was everything I have in my live, my last 20 years, since I brought her from Cuba, I dedicated...
    marqmir marqmir 66-70, M 1 Response Feb 17

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    I don't understand after I lost my mother Oct 3

    2013 I have not been the same I snap at people I don't won't to go anywhere I don't won't anyone around just not the same as I once was and I do not understand I no this is not my mom would have wanted she was a great mother she rasid me in church she had so many health problems...
    keibb37 keibb37 36-40, M 2 Responses Mar 29

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    I'm hurt that my father is rejecting me

    because I'm df'd. I'm gay but have been trying to turn away from it so my family will talk with me again. I'm so upset.
    1stborn1976 1stborn1976 36-40, F Sep 14

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    My mother was my father's caregiver from 1989

    until his death in 2010. She refused to ever accept that his increasing disabilities would cause his death, and refused to use his DNR several times. She was angry that my sister-in-law and I flew in from different parts of the country about 5 days before my father's death...
    South1977 South1977 51-55, F 1 Response Jun 25

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    Life Will Never Be The Same Without Her

    My mother passed away in 2010. March 17th to be exact. I miss her terribly. Not a day goes by without me missing my mom. I sometimes see her when I visit a place she loved or wish she´d be with me when I go to a place I know she would have liked to know. The grief is endless...
    underconstruction underconstruction 41-45, F 10 Responses Apr 17, 2011

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    Life Is Definately Different...

    My mother died early 2010. It was the WORST day of my life, and i've had some super bad days. I was chatting on the phone with her when she slipped in her jacuzzi and hit her head and drown. I went to check on her and of course found her. I was screaming and crying and just...
    zipper42 zipper42 26-30 133 Responses Jul 7, 2010

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    Unexpected Loss

    My mother died on December 15, 2009. So it has been about 6 months. I recieved a call in the afternoon, as i was on my way to work. It was my mum's husband, who in a choked voice informed me that she had suffered a heart attack whilst playing tennis and died instantly. She was 56...
    mackerelsun mackerelsun 22-25, F 7 Responses Jul 17, 2010

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    My mom passed away when i was 7,

    actually she died on my birthday, i was so young and i so her dead body. She had breast cancer, she faught for almost 4 years, she even travekked abroad to see doctors but it was too late. Of course i didn't know that, i tought she was just sick and she was going to be ok, so i...
    salmahidayat salmahidayat 18-21, F Mar 17

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    My mum was always there

    for me and now she isn't . People say that after a while it gets easier , it doesn't . My mum was an amazing woman and it has been four years since she has died . Since her death I have found a man but I'm still scared I'm afraid that if I love someone as much as what I did her...
    sezza96 sezza96 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 25

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    I have the date of my mothers death written,

    because if not I would forget. Over two years, yet I rarely think about her. I visited her grave once, and never since. Do you think I didn't love my mother? That may very well be, but this is how I feel; When I think of my mom, I feel so much pain, I push the thoughts away, and...
    Schmort Schmort 18-21, M 1 Response Sep 7

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    My grandmother was my mother.

    I miss her so much! Last night I had a dream about seeing her. When she saw me she said my name and told me that she missed and loved me. This was a sweet dream, I can't wait until I see her and my Son again in Heaven.
    Faith2008 Faith2008 46-50, F 1 Response Mar 29

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    Always There

    Your Mother is always with you. She's the whisper of the leaves as you walk down the street; she's the smell of bleach in your freshly laundered socks; she's the cool hand on your brow when you're not well. Your Mother lives inside your laughter. And she's crystallized in every...
    diablesse34 diablesse34 46-50, F 7 Responses Aug 31, 2013

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    How My Mother's Death Changed Me

    I used to be the happy-go-lucky type.  You know, the one who always saw the proverbial silver lining.  This all changed in a few hours. My mother and I never had a perfect relationship, but who does?  We were friends, as well as family and definitely had our share...
    callmejingles callmejingles 41-45, F 57 Responses Aug 20, 2008

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    Mom died in Tijuana, Mexico May 22nd 2014

    approximately 1900, alone. Guilt overwhelms me. She should have been with me, despite our small and insignificant differences. There should have been more awareness on my part of her ways and I should have given way to them while submersing my own habits in my home. When I...
    Morandob Morandob 41-45, M May 28

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    My Mother Died After Childbirth At 28

    My mom died at the young age of 28.  She died from complications from childbirth.  (blood clot). She never made it home from the hospital with my new born baby brother.  I remember the night before my father went to get her suitcase. It was around 8 p.m. and I was...
    rosey122 rosey122 56-60, F 5 Responses Jul 22, 2010

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    Loss Of My Beloved Mother

    I lost my mom on Nov 14.  She had parkinsons for years but was doing ok, till we returned to NJ and she went into a nursing home.  I feel like if she was at home she would not have gotten pneumonia and died.Mom and I were close,  i always asked her advice and we were best...
    debbie8800 debbie8800 51-55, F 25 Responses Dec 21, 2011

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    My mom passed away when I was 12,

    and I do think it has changed me in many ways. I'm more scared now of getting attached to people, but I know I'm a stronger person now. To anyone who has lost there mother young or old, don't lose hope. You're not going through this alone. :)
    divaMary3 divaMary3 18-21, F Apr 21

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    It's been almost 6 years

    and I'm still grieving since my mom passed away. She was the only One who supported me in everything I do, encourages me to do more good to other people even when really hate me. Supported me in all sorts of ways. Never dragged me down like others. Always understands me. But sad...
    lanhancupto lanhancupto 26-30, M 3 Responses Apr 6

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    She was my rock. I was

    such a ***** growing up. I have her hell every minute. I miss her so much. After she died my whole personality changed, my whole demeanor on life changed.
    Booksaremypassion Booksaremypassion 41-45, F 1 Response May 3

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    December 5 2013 my mother passed away

    and I am only 13. She was only 33 and she choked in her sleep. I haven't been the same I question how ill move on and how I can live with life but I live on because I know my mom wouldn't want me to end my life and that she would want me to be strong so that is why I am here...
    MartineVilla MartineVilla 13-15, M 4 Responses Jan 3

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    My New Life

    My New Life! I hate my new life. It is another chapter in my life that I don't want to turn. It has been a month since my beloved mother left me and my family all alone. With her death a part of me has died. I am not happy ............I am not the same. I want to close my book...
    beingafriend beingafriend 31-35 1 Response Feb 7, 2013

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    For Everyone Who's Lost Their Mother

    “You can shed tears that she is gone, or you can smile because she has lived. You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back, or you can open your eyes and see all she's left. Your heart can be empty because you can't see her, or you can be full of the love you shared...
    diablesse34 diablesse34 46-50, F 7 Responses Aug 27, 2013

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    A Tribute To My Mother

    HER JOURNEY'S JUST BEGUNby E. BrennemanDon't think of her as gone away -her journey's just begun,life holds so many facets -this earth is only one.Just think of her as restingfrom the sorrows and the tearsin a place of warmth and comfortwhere there are no days and years.Think how...
    underconstruction underconstruction 41-45, F 22 Responses Apr 24, 2011

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