I Am Disgusted With Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 272 People

    I just did it, being disgusting to my self,

    i somehow realized and made my self showing that i writing about my anguish and hatred to my self on EP to be watched by someone else, that i know that he gonna badmouth in the back, things that you called as a human... friend is idiotic term. but i realized that and showed...
    blackravencat blackravencat
    22-25, M
    May 13, 2015

    Why Did I Do That?

    I went to the fair the other night and had a few beers, in fact it turned into a few too many.  I did not get stinking, falling down drunk but I did have a pretty good 'buzz' so to speak going.  It has been three years since I last had anything more than one beer a week...
    FranzJosef FranzJosef
    26-30, M
    3 Responses Jul 23, 2007

    Growing Up Fat

    When I was younger I was just like every other girl out there. I was a blonde ballerina who was eager to see the world. But then I quit dance and my mom wasn't there anymore. She was always with my sister who never quit dance. I was with my dad who would let me have anything I...
    DistortedReality96 DistortedReality96
    1 Response Jul 29, 2011


    I don't like the changes in my physical appearance. I guess part of it is just years gone past but then I can see the stuff stress has added and the lovely weight issue that I'm so fighting. I just don't like myself anymore... sad huh.
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality
    36-40, F
    18 Responses Sep 3, 2008

    Why Is My Life Like This........ Cuz Its My Fault

    i was never (and still are) a smart person. i mean i never got good grades i didn’t even graduate from 8 grade! i barely graduated from high school. i entered college thinking ok i will do the best i can but now im about to be dropped out and its all my fault. i blame my self...
    sagaxsega sagaxsega
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 6, 2011

    Cant Stop Eating

    I am so disgusted with myself. I have been eating food nonstop for 3 weeks to the point where i get nauseous and i cant stop. I was 100 pounds and now am 125. After i eat i feel disgusting then once the feeling wears off i go to eat again. all fattening food brownies ice cream...
    goldengirlxx goldengirlxx
    3 Responses Apr 17, 2009

    Especially when other people are in the picture.

    When others speak fondly of me, I get upset. I want them to just shut up, and that makes me feel like a bad person. Some days I look in the mirror and think "hey, I'm not that bad after all" and shortly after I'll remember everything I've been called over the years. "Fat" "Ugly...
    iKitKat iKitKat
    18-21, F
    1 Response Sep 10, 2014


    Inside and out I loathe how I look,I loathe how fat I let myself get, how I havent lost the weight I planned to, how Im still so so disgusting, every inch of me. I loathe my scars. That I was pathetic enough to do them. That they are in their hundreds, most deep enough to last...
    Tesse Tesse
    18-21, F
    19 Responses Apr 27, 2008

    I Feel Disgusting.

    I'm not fat. I'm not ugly. I may be short and look younger than I am, but it doesn't bother me too much. I feel disgusted by my brain, my thought processes, things I think about, things I do, my personality, who I am and how I live. I can't help but objectify woman sometimes...
    mcfarris1 mcfarris1
    18-21, M
    3 Responses Sep 21, 2013
    ACyanideSurprise ACyanideSurprise
    18-21, M
    1 Response Feb 17, 2015

    When Your Brain Screams Louder Than You Do.

    I have never shared any of this with anyone and I have to share with someone even if just here. I cannot veiw myself in a positive light. I feel constantly unnatractive, and everyday my brain battles itself, I cannot stop being afraid that I am, will be or get over the fact that...
    ALittleLostAtTimes ALittleLostAtTimes
    2 Responses Aug 2, 2012

    Lately I haven't been able to look at myself,

    touch myself, think. It all just feels wrong, looks wrong, I can't stand myself. I always thought I was a b*tch but pretty decent most of the time, and now I just realized how horribly awful I am :/
    WintersSoldier WintersSoldier
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jul 20, 2014

    I disgust myself everyday.

    ..I'm obese and can't lose weight because I struggle with depression, anxiety and binge eating disorder. I hate myself more than words can describe and I can't stand looking at myself. I'm worthless
    kaidosoo kaidosoo
    18-21, F
    Jul 20, 2014

    I Don't Know Who I Am

    From a horrid childhood I've never recognised myself, I don't know who I am and I could go as fare as to say to look or think about myself makes me sick! Iv had counselling from normal to high end but nothing works, every day I fill my day with other people or there problems so I...
    Justmeoneday Justmeoneday
    1 Response Jul 31, 2012
    pumkin106 pumkin106
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jul 27, 2014

    It seems like I FAIL at EVERYTHING I do.

    I never achieve my goals, which I set pretty often. For the last 4 days, I have binge eaten nothing but junk food or fast food. I've never felt so disgusted and sick in my life. I also have bipolar disorder (that's another story...) and I've dealt with substance abuse for a long...
    mnm92 mnm92
    22-25, F
    Jul 24, 2014

    I Cant Stop!

    Ive never been one to post my feelings anywhere where people can find them. but maybe if someone reads how messed up I am, I will feel better. I am a legal anorexic, and cant stand the sight of myself. my hips are too wide, my thighs should have their own zipcode, and my stomach...
    angelfaced12 angelfaced12
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jul 6, 2010

    I hate everything about me.

    I've done things that i regret so much. There is this constant war in my head and they're telling me to do very bad things
    marollie marollie
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 7, 2015
    emmacla emmacla
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jul 27, 2014

    I truly am. I hate the way I look,

    I hate the way I act and treat people. I hate that I can say one thing, than won't even end up doing it. I hate that I tell all my friends that I will be there for them, and than as soon as they are okay, I break apart. I hate that every morning, I wake up, wishing that I hadn...
    NYSlilAngel NYSlilAngel
    26-30, F
    Mar 28, 2014

    I'm a nightmare dressed

    as a daydream.
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Nov 9, 2014

    A Hard Life

    I am young, only 15. I have struggled with my body weight from the time I was eight years old. It has held me back so much and made me believe I was so much less of a person for simply being more of a person. My sister is one of the smallest people I have ever met, she is...
    DistortedReality96 DistortedReality96
    Jul 22, 2011


    I feel absolutely disgusted with myself. The way I look, the way I speak, the way my face is, the way I think, the way my life is, everything. I feel like an utter blob of human goo on the bottom of almost any measurable scale. I'm not fat. That's what many people seem to be...
    lareth lareth
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Feb 1, 2011

    The Imperfection Of Perfection

    Do you ever have the feeling that you are completely inadequate? I go to a private school in which every opportunity is a competition to excel, in front of every open door are a thousand guards waiting for you to pass, just so they can rip you apart. I have always wanted to be...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Mar 4, 2013

    Define Myself Threw Lies

    All threw our teen age years we are told to be unique and be ourselves, don't let anyone else define who we are. But what if I define myself threw lies. How am i supose to know who to be. I am getting to the point where i am not sure if I can live with myself and my lies...
    pro36 pro36
    8 Responses Feb 24, 2009


    It hurts to look at mirrors. I'm not hideous, at least I don't think so, but all the glorified beauty and grace that lies in the faces of others is lacking. My nose is odd, too close to my face and strangely hooked. This is did not even know about myself until a few months prior...
    gwehnyfar gwehnyfar
    16-17, F
    May 6, 2011

    I can't stand myself

    and I am a waste of a human being. I'm not strong mentally or physically. I am not driven in any way, shape or form. I am disgusted with myself for not trying to change this. I can't stand my unwillingness to improve myself. It is disgusting.
    persononinternet persononinternet
    18-21, M
    6 Responses Jan 16, 2014

    I look in the mirror

    and see a fake. I look at my skin and see scars. If I looked below a bridge would I see my reflection.....or a way out. In the end I guess it's all the same. And these are thoughts I have to live with, until the final moment when I'm free, and that haunts me.
    Chocolate29 Chocolate29
    16-17, F
    1 Response Sep 27, 2014

    Forgiving Myself Is The First Step

    As I was driving to meet up w my friends I told myself I wasn't going to drink. I repeated the phrase "don't drink...ur not going to drink". When I got to the place my friend already had a shot ready for me to take. I told her that I was driving so I didn't want to drink ...she...
    LadyFemme LadyFemme
    1 Response Jun 21, 2012
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