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I Am Divorcing My Controlling, Emotionally Abusive Husband

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 124 People

    I am married to a man in the military.

    I am 31 and have a 10month old boy and a nine year old boy. I've been with my husband for three years and married to him for one year. He started with yelling at me and pushing me now that I have moved away from my home state and the little bit of family I did have to run to he...
    Sumkissed82 Sumkissed82 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 2

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    I’M In A Bad Place.

    And I don’t know what to do. I feel like a fool, to be honest. I’ve been with this man for 21 yrs. We have two children (b16 and g18). I don’t even know where or how to begin this story…I guess at the beginning… I met him when I was 21 yrs old. He was my first real...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses May 13, 2013

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    Walking On The Eggsells

    I am very tired of walking on the eggshells for the last 11 years of marriage. The sign was evident from the beginning, but I did not want to admit that I married to the wrong person.    So, for this long 11 years, I endured. Yesterday, again.  His fight departure...
    akowilson akowilson 51-55 4 Responses Nov 7, 2010

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    12/3/2012....no Mas

    Hey EP friends, I am so at peace to say.................It's official my divorce became final as of 12/3/2012. What a long ride, hard, bumpy, difficult, crazy rollercoaster of a whirl this has been. Just when I want to give up, I decided to move on, move forward and not let...
    chie5189 chie5189 36-40 3 Responses Dec 4, 2012

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    Reality Has Set In....

    I have now come to stark reality & conclusion that I too am now ready to divorce my controlling, emotionally abusive husband. I started the procedures back last August 2011, and was guilt ridden, mad to feel neurotic, uneasy, like I didnt know what i was doing when he convinced...
    chie5189 chie5189 36-40 6 Responses May 21, 2012

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    I'M So Proud Of All Of You

    You deserve someone who respects you and I'm glad you're getting out. Stay strong.
    mandythepoetryaddict mandythepoetryaddict 16-17, F Nov 17, 2013

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    Middle Of Divorcing My Abuser

    I am in the middle of divorcing my abusive husband of 16 years. This has been the hardest thing in the world for me. My life was flipped upside down, my kids are not the same, My normal life is all different. I lost 1/2 my family (his family) I lost my sister & brother as they...
    williamsa40 williamsa40 36-40, F 3 Responses Apr 1, 2013

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    Confused

    Am confused. Almost divorced- 12 years sexless marriage with a passive aggressive. I am 41/F with a 7 yo D. New Neighbor is cute single and 35. Smiles at me- good eye contact. Very very helpful helped change a tire texts with smiley faces etc. Last week he came for a beer so I...
    Lesmiz Lesmiz 41-45, F 2 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    9 Year Marriage Got Duped

    I'm taking a somewhat different look at my husband. I think there are always the "red" flags in place that many of us choose to ignore. However, almost 99% of the time, abusers are ALWAYS charming. Some are obvious, and others more subtle. However, there is a connection with the...
    cjn12 cjn12 36-40 4 Responses Oct 14, 2012

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    I Am 20 And Afraid To Divorce My Controlling, Emotionally Abusive Husband.

    We started dating when I was 16, and things were never that great. When I was 17 my mom kicked me out and I moved in with him. I ended up marrying him 1 year ago Feb. I've wanted to leave for a while but he always convinces me to stay and that he will change. Surprise, surprise...
    lydiabxo lydiabxo 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 29, 2013

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    Controlling Husband

    I have been married to a controlling, manipulative, and emotionally abusive husband for 20 years.  He is 10 years older than me and I was only 20 when I married him.  I never recognized his behavior as abusive until just this winter 2011.  We had relocated to a different...
    loop71 loop71 36-40 8 Responses Jun 19, 2011

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    Married And Confused

     I have been married for 10 yrs this the 2nd marriage for both of us. I have 2 children from a previous marriage. my current husband after being together for a yr shared one of his sexual fantasies with me which was participating in a ********* with another male he said he...
    liveoutloudoxox liveoutloudoxox 36-40 1 Response Oct 7, 2010

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    Can't Take It Anymore

    My now husband was my mysterious neighbor a few years ago...That was a mystery I should never have tried to unravel...He's been controlling since the beginning..I had so many friends and things that I loved to do and that came to a halt when I met him and I didn't even realize...
    melcat15 melcat15 31-35 Sep 28, 2010

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    Now This Feeling

    i've posted in another group about the process of leaving my emotionally-abusive husband, but this is my first post to this group. i've started the process for filing for divorce and am planning to leave this month. but today, i had a strange feeling. about an hour after i...
    AngelineWilliam AngelineWilliam 36-40 2 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    It'S Happening

    Well I divorced him...that monster that would abuse in any way. It was very hard because deep down in my heart I love him. Not only did he leave a whole in my heart, unable to have kids, he had left my wallet empty. He says that he doesn't have to pay me back because since we...
    2young4marriage 2young4marriage 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 28, 2013

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    Should I Tell Him Before I Leave

    I am planning my strategy to leave a 5 year relationship. He yells at me my children throws stuff, most of the time the yelling at me is because someone else did something to make him angry. I see him get excited if the kids do something they aren;t supposed to because he feels...
    6 Responses Feb 6, 2013

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    Leaving A Controlling, Abusive Husband

    I am planning on leaving my controlling abusive husband. I am scared to leave though. I know why. It is because he has made me feel I cannot do anything without him.  I want to leave, I just need the courage to take the first step, find a place of my own.
    blueeyes2010 blueeyes2010 36-40 42 Responses Nov 8, 2009

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    Love Does Not Possess. It Frees

    My story is like that of many here. I am married to a very successful accomplished man for the last 14 years. Can't believe it is 14 years. We have really stayed together for 9 of those years. I have realized 3-5 years ago that this relationship is toxic and is degrading me a...
    lovedoesnotpossess lovedoesnotpossess 36-40, F 4 Responses Mar 27, 2013

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    Shows Over

    My divorce is over and done but I will share my story here in time. Its good to be free single and living my life without the toxic ex hurting me every way he could.
    LadyGypsy LadyGypsy 36-40, F 8 Responses Apr 1, 2013

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    My husband moved out

    after yelling at me for not saying good night. He was jealous of my female best friend, my book club, my yoga class and my job. He frequently shared his negative perception of me. He wanted to move back after a week but it was so peaceful that I decided he needed to move the...
    suburbandivorcing suburbandivorcing 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    I Am Trying To Figure Out How To Leave My Husband

    i knew how he was before we even got married, i saw the problems he had. but he never treated me badly until we left my hometown and went to california. and then that is when his ugly side showed up. but still i stayed, and i married him years later. i know i thought i could...
    sadeyes7294 sadeyes7294 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 5, 2012

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    Am Leaving

    after being married for a 2 years.I have a 4 months baby and am planning on vacating our matrimonal home tonite. My husband is verbally and physically abusive. I used to read about abusive relationships cant believe it is happening to me. he attacks my esteem so bad that i feel...
    Mazwi Mazwi 26-30 2 Responses Dec 2, 2010

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    I Just Keep Giving And He Keeps Taking...and It's Still My Fault

    Married 22 years, 3 kids, 18, 15 and 8. For 16 of those 22 years, my husband has been trying to make it in some sort of business. I worked for him most of that time,usually never making any money because we were always trying to "make it", thus paying everything and everyone...
    shellykcropper shellykcropper 41-45 2 Responses Aug 11, 2011

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    Common Sense Finially Hit Me...

    My soon to be ex husband, have been married for almost 5 years, and boy oh boy it feels like 10. We have one child together, who was born before we got married. this was my first real relationship. Over the course of our relationship, my ex was verbally abusive. At times he used...
    IusedtobeMrs IusedtobeMrs 26-30 1 Response Feb 18, 2013

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    Ready To Leave Emotional Abusive Husband

    I am in a 'Emotional-Abusive' marriage. I always thought abuse had to be physical but after doing exstensive research, I have finally come to know and realize that for over 4-years now I am a abused woman. He takes all his anger out on me. Everyday he tells me over and over how...
    heartbroken2012 heartbroken2012 41-45, F 5 Responses Mar 20, 2012

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    I'm divorcing my husband of 8 years

    and ending a 12-years relationship. I met him back in university he's from Europe and I'm from Asia. This is going to be long... After uni I moved back to Asia but we kept a long distance relationship, I initially wanted to end the relationship but he was persistent and I was...
    lastfeather lastfeather 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    Am I Crazy?

    I have been married for a handful of years. We are a blended family. Before we got married, we had an incident concerning my ex and myself. I moved out on my own for a while to get my head together. I learned then that he was jealous and had quite a temper on him. I naively...
    princessofdenial princessofdenial 36-40, F 5 Responses Aug 13, 2013

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    Mission: Accomplished 2012

    As of 7/10/2012 @ 8:09 a.m. EST I FILED FOR DIVORCE! Not this is my 2nd time around filing, and I am determined to go all the way! It's been a long, drawn out few months of deciding, re-deciding, going back, and then say WTF.....NO MORE! I think I got my revelation when I had...
    chie5189 chie5189 36-40 1 Response Jul 10, 2012

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    I Am Trying To Walk Away From Physically, Verbally And Emotionally Abusive Husbanb

    I've been together with my husband for 7 years, he was married before and when we started having the relationship, he had 2 daughters now aged 16 and 17, now we have our own son aged 5, all this time he has been physically abusing me, he has been verbally abusing me infront of...
    Nduks Nduks 31-35 3 Responses Jun 2, 2012

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    Trying To Get Out!

    I have been married 23 years, I did not see how controlling he was then, and when I did realize it, it was to late. I was forced into marriage at 17 because of a teen pregnancy, and he then took me hundreds of miles away from  my family. I lost the baby 30 days to the day...
    nurseangel44 nurseangel44 41-45, F 11 Responses Oct 23, 2010

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    I Finally Left Him.

    I'm not sure where to begin. I was married for 18 years to an emotionally abusive, controlling, raging, cruel man. I'm the only person in my entire family that is divorced. We have two sons, 14 and 11. The oldest one has Aspbergers Syndrome,ADHD, Oppositional Defiance...
    elindapierce elindapierce 41-45, F 5 Responses May 11, 2013

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    17 Yrs Of Abuse

    I was married for 17 yrs. and pysically, mentally, verbally and emotionally abused. My husband had a drinking problem and treated me like a sex object more than a wife. I've had things thrown at me, thrown across rooms, joked, pushed, he would treat me like a ***** around his...
    shell1021 shell1021 41-45, F 3 Responses Jan 19, 2010

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    My Controlling Husband.....

    Hi, I have been married for 20 years this feburary 7th and we have 3 sons ages 26,21,18 and 2 of my sons have seizures but are on medication and are doing good. Just for the past 10 years I have atempted to leave him we even had family meetings but they never seem to work because...
    afraidandconfused afraidandconfused 41-45 2 Responses Mar 4, 2012

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    Stuck In A Abusive Marriage For 8 Yrs

    Hey ladies I am married for8 yrs to a verbally physically financially abusive and controlling man. We live in his house bought after marriage and have 2 cars . My older child is 7 yrs old and younger s 2. Acc to my husband I am worthless useless human being. I am stay at home mom...
    Honeysaggar05 Honeysaggar05 31-35 2 Responses Jun 12, 2012

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    Enough Is Enough!

    My daughter was 2 when I met my husband. Her biological father turned out to be a deadbeat and in jail a few years later for raping and beating up his current girlfriend. I should have always trusted my gut. One of the first dates we had, I wasn't social enough for him in front...
    Soccermom77 Soccermom77 31-35, F 1 Response Oct 9, 2012

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    I'm Sorry I Waited Till My Youngest Was 18 To Leave

    I gave up almost half my life to a controlling, emotionally abusive husband, and children that learned to also treat me that way. Most of it I was unhappy. Sometimes very depressed. It took me a long time to figure out what was going on because it was familiar. My...
    Stephanii Stephanii 51-55 4 Responses Nov 17, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    He is making it very difficult for me as he refuses to give me my rights and he tries to increase his controlling behaviour over the children 20 and 12y/old.
    rita617 rita617 51-55, F Jul 5

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    Growing up I felt like a prisoner in my own home. The only time I really ever left the house was to go to school or to go shopping with my parents. Whenever I tried to do something...
    dokkyo dokkyo 22-25 2 Responses Jul 13

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    I was once married to a very abusive & controlling man who almost took my sanity & made me believe that without him I could do nothing. I never saw his evil nature until the latter...
    pebbles83 pebbles83 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 2

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    I am currently reading a book about controlling parents and how to deal with the past. It is helping, but I am emotionally stuck. Part of me feels that I am being over dramatic...
    CatLover311 CatLover311 22-25, F 1 day ago

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    I really don't want to talk too much about it but I married a controlling psychopath. He changed as soon as we were married and went on a spiral of abuse and menial torture. He was...
    TamaraTheWorld TamaraTheWorld 26-30, F 7 Responses Jul 10

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    I don't know if this is bitter sweet. I don't know how to feel. Tomorrow I will go and file the final motion for divorce. We have been together for almost 18 years. This is going...
    ShonieGETYOLIFE1 ShonieGETYOLIFE1 36-40, F Jul 14

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    I met this person a year ago in May. We met at a coffee shop and I took interest in him because he seemed so introverted but had a magnificent soul. We became friends quickly. I...
    AddyAddyAddy AddyAddyAddy 22-25, F 5 Responses Jul 16

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    I Was in a 7 year relationship (I was 17 he was 25 when we met),And in the beginning it was great (or so I Naively thought....) but slowly he became controlling,demanding and what...
    Naggi12 Naggi12 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    I woke up this morning feeling worse than I did yesterday. I haven't talked to my fiance about any of this and I really want too. I worry that he will dismiss my feelings and tell...
    CatLover311 CatLover311 22-25, F 1 day ago

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    Not really husband, but long-term boyfriend. Should have realized this years ago, but he was treated like crap by an ex, and now either expects everyone to put up with his poor...
    gottabebettertoo gottabebettertoo 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    Last night my mom kept calling me fat, and saying that if I didn't become nicer and more submissive that I'll never get married. Way to go, mom. I feel super great about myself...
    luna1912 luna1912 18-21, F Jul 15

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    My ex randomly messages me out of the blue. And we've been talking about our past relationship. I really was in love with him, but he was controlling and emotionally abusive. But...
    Cassandra13Park Cassandra13Park 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I am 19 years old and a sophomore in college majoring in nursing. I met the love of my life my first year at college and our relationship has blossomed into something beautiful...
    tphelps tphelps 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 1

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    It's like in the Lord of the Rings when Smeagol says to Gollum, "Go away, and never come back!" and then starts laughing and jumping up and down, shouting, "Smeagol is free!" That...
    selbeditor selbeditor 18-21, F Jul 18

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    I have always thought my mother is selfish. I am 23 years old and I am still being treated like an eighth grader who is still fighting for his independence. Most of the times, I...
    wirrywoo wirrywoo 22-25, M Jul 4

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