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I Am Dying A Slow Death From Lonliness And Despair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 16 People

    Self Imposed Exile

    39 year old male.adopted a frnds daughter who died when i was 18 due to circumstances.life revolved around her.never been in a relationship and stayed celibate for her sake.was diagnosed with bone degen n cml in 2005.my daughter kept me rolling but i lost her in june.dont kno how...
    orangemoon orangemoon 36-40, M 3 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    Rambling About Nothing

    I do not know how to fall in love. I have been single for too long, and I know it is me, something is "wrong" with me and I have yet to figure it out. Today I thought maybe part of the problem is because I honestly do not know how to let myself fal in love. I have met interesting...
    Rae1983 Rae1983 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 27, 2012

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    I'm so lonely, if loneliness was an illness it

    would have killed me by now. I am in love with a severely depressed man that won't even text me back no matter how many times I text him of go to see him. He's so sick and won't get help. He barely showers. I am a beautiful woman with a huge heart and just want to find someone...
    PhotographyQueen PhotographyQueen 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 11

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    Related Experiences

    I feel like dying slowly and watching everything Move in slow motion . Not a painful death though . But like Falling asleep.
    LunarDream LunarDream 13-15, M 2 Responses Apr 2

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    Have always been estranged from them, but for the last few years, I don't even share the same space as them, and once one starts that practice, its almost a "point of no return...
    0nest0 0nest0 31-35, M 2 Responses Apr 12

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    I get intense feelings that turn into anxiety/panic attacks every time I think about dying. And it's over the silliest of things, I could be looking down at my hands and just...
    boyda12 boyda12 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 3

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    Why should I? I have soul insurance from He who loved me before the foundation of the world. I do not fear dying, because if I die, I only know I'll be serving Him instead. However...
    ladypirate108 ladypirate108 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 4

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    HAD A FEW CLOSE CALLS AND ANYWAY EVERYONE'S GONNA DIE SOMEDAY! I really don’t see the big deal about death… everyone gonna die anyway so there's no way you can be alive...
    MilweePisces MilweePisces 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 10

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    I was depressed all the time a mother of toe and one on the way I felt lost I had a home And husband a car a boat a family.. No reason I know now to be depressed I lost my 7 month...
    laceykight laceykight 26-30, F Apr 13

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    My father had been dying of cancer for some time. His death was not unexpected or particularly traumatic. But at the moment of his death I reacted in a way that was out of my...
    darwinsconfusion darwinsconfusion 56-60, M 1 Response Apr 5

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    Friday. The dead have all the knowledge. That thought crossed my mind this morning as I was heading into work. Having recently lost a friend to cancer, I guess I've been thinking...
    samedeepwater samedeepwater 46-50, M 5 days ago

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    I do not fear death, the manifestation nor the action of dying. What I fear is the pain that comes with it. I force myself to believe it's the only way out, if I just took my own...
    GrimAndInUtterDismay GrimAndInUtterDismay 13-15, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    ‘Cut throat!’ shrieks death as it stands at the door It can’t travel far any more It is tied to the intricacies of life Fight or flight Light or night Heaven or hell Eyes...
    TheWiseTwo TheWiseTwo 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 26

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    Now that the people from India got busted for stealing and faking documents they are saying i want them working for me... i want them here.... they have not given me anything i...
    FreeThinker2 FreeThinker2 46-50 1 Response Apr 14

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    You're getting on with your life, While I'm getting over mine. Interesting... Life has a way of going crazy when you least expect it. I never thought it would be like this. You...
    odditblue odditblue 46-50, F 1 Response Apr 14

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    This is an email from one of my friends, sent yesterday. Because of its impact and deeply powerful message, I wish to share it with you, in the hopes this might give you the...
    TNTandCHOCOLATE TNTandCHOCOLATE 31-35 2 days ago

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    I could be saved. I could be healed. I could be picked up and held together in the embrace of someone who used to love me. But he doesn't love me anymore. I did something to fuckk...
    DancingWithFire DancingWithFire 16-17, F Apr 12

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    It's not like fearing it will change anything. It comes to everyone, curling both guilty and innocent souls into its out reached arms. To some it comes slow; to others, formidably...
    Audrina14 Audrina14 13-15, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Often in life people have problems, life is full of problems and everyone has their issues. Some people have a harder time than others in life and sometimes these people who really...
    T4RD15 T4RD15 26-30 2 Responses Apr 7

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    Life talks without saying a word.... If something isn't meant to be something will take place in order to prevent it from happening & thats exactly how it's been all of my life. I...
    TheWorldVsJ TheWorldVsJ 26-30, M 2 Responses Mar 27

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    Lost. That is what I constantly feel. Everybody tells me that I should just die or kill myself, but why is it that when I try they always stop me. I cut. I love the constant...
    bulimicbixtch49 bulimicbixtch49 13-15, F 1 Response Apr 9

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    And if I do die, there's a very high chance that it will be suicide. I honestly would've done it tonight, but my friend, Ryan, talked me out of it. Never the less, there is this...
    BeautifulMistake21 BeautifulMistake21 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 9

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    just 3 months have passed that my father died.. i was with him days n nights.. i have seen the whole process of death, pain suffering, restlessness, wanting to live more, n all...
    90colors 90colors 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 14

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    Little by little...brick by brick...I'm losing myself. I'm becoming nothing. I'm dying. I'm fading. I'm silently crying for help. In the end, I wish I could just have it done with...
    Litwick Litwick 18-21, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Pressure on my chest, hard to breathe these shallow breaths. The weight of death is upon me. It’s stillness encompassing and caressing me. What is to be expressed when one feels...
    mysoulachesforyou mysoulachesforyou 31-35, F Mar 24

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    Just hearing a blast beat turns me on. It took some time to discover this awesome world. Earlier, I use to listen to oldschool rap, some rock AC/DC, Run DMC, Guns N' Roses. I had...
    samoralsophy samoralsophy 18-21, M Mar 26

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    Living is now dying 
Dying means your in hell 
Hell means you’re home .
    sillygirl008 sillygirl008 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    Another day to pretend..to keep my head held high..to smile..to cover the pain..to forget..i wish I could just stop from hurting..from dying...
    babslabs babslabs 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 2

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    I don't think of death as scary. I'm more upset at the fact that it might hurt. Although, whether pain is the case or not, I still think that death is a natural part of life that...
    Juls4 Juls4 16-17, F 18 hrs ago

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    I fear death, I really do. This whole year, I couldn't sleep, I'm tired.. it really hurts. My fear of death turned me to a suicidal person. Though I fear death, I still wanna die...
    GirlyGirlBil GirlyGirlBil 13-15, F 3 Responses Mar 24

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    After 12 years and several cancers, my mother passed away last week. What I perceived, felt and saw in that time is what brought me to discover what an empath is. I have accepted...
    mrbless mrbless 36-40, M 3 Responses Mar 25

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    Every second of every minute of every day all that i can focus on is death. Me & life are like hyenas & lions - never got along & never will. People say that its all about your...
    TheWorldVsJ TheWorldVsJ 26-30, M 3 Responses Apr 3

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    I am 38 and have wished for death as long as I can remember. I think back to my childhood, when things would go wrong or I would do something so stupid (as children do), I would...
    Modernii Modernii 41-45, M 1 Response Apr 4

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    I dont know if this post is still working, but I want/need to share my story. I was married to a guy who was a psycho when I was not even 18. Coming from India, thats like a death...
    kindredspirit75 kindredspirit75 36-40, F 1 Response Apr 5

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    I always think about my death, my friends death, and of course my families death, I'm not suicidal, I'm not crazy i just can't seem to stop i don't wish for no ones death but i...
    cycloneok cycloneok 16-17, M Apr 12

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    I wonder about death, because 15 years ago I had a really creepy conversation about death with my five year old daughter, who doesn't remember the conversation. She was drawing...
    betweenthe10andthequeen betweenthe10andthequeen 56-60, M 2 Responses Apr 13

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    I agree with the death penalty only if the perpetrator is caught redhanded, or confesses. Too many people on death row have been found to be innocent by DNA tests that were not...
    phillysteve phillysteve 36-40, M 5 days ago

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    I am pretty slow...slow at doing assignments, slow at walking, slow at getting up and getting ready for school, slow in video games, slow at driving (sometimes) slow at physical...
    ConquistadorXL ConquistadorXL 16-17, M Mar 24

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    I believe child molesters deserve the death penalty! Anyone who would commit a crime, that would take away a child's innocence , take away their life, their future, they don't...
    NYSlilAngel NYSlilAngel 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 27

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    Honestly, I wouldn't. I just feel as if everything that has been done in my life is pointless, and, yes, blahblahblah mope mope -- I'm just typing this as simple fact instead of...
    thelostbetween thelostbetween 16-17, F Mar 29

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    So.. My nan is dying of cancer. It really hurts wish i had more time with her shes still craking jokes but i jus wish she new how much iv always loved her. Will nva gt the tum back...
    sosadallthetime sosadallthetime 22-25, F Mar 30

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    Okay, I listen death metal. I love it. I love those growling and screams. I don't love it because I'm emo, gothic or etc. I love it because it's so interesting and hard to do it...
    Aidan6 Aidan6 16-17, F Apr 3

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    I feel like I'm dying in the inside, but I know I'm already dead. I just want to finish myself off. There is no point to go on.
    lshidonil lshidonil 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 6

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    It's been almost an hour since I received the news of my grandma about her health. My family and I have known few months ago her health has gotten worst and the doctor said she has...
    raldy raldy 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 7

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    You've probably all seen me. Or at least read my posts. I want to write this, it'll be like one of those sappy #day32 things. These are my thoughts, pulled out and strung together...
    shadowgem shadowgem 13-15, F Apr 12

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    In the past week, there have been two people in my life that have died suddenly from massive heart attacks! I constantly think of how quickly life can be taken from you. I think it...
    Samantha0000 Samantha0000 26-30, F Apr 13

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    I have been trying to fight to keep my darling Ellie alive since she started getting sick 3 weeks ago. She is 12 years old. Very old for a goat. I have three, twins (one of them is...
    LindaNKVermey LindaNKVermey 41-45, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I'm mentally ill and I hide it all from my family. I'm ashamed I guess, or scared of what might happen.
    jijipong jijipong 16-17, M 2 hrs ago

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    There are times that I want to be alone, just left alone. People don't understand that. They don't understand when they are trying to suffocate me and it annoys me. If I told you I...
    BeingAnAnglophile BeingAnAnglophile 16-17, F 1 hr ago

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    A lot of it has to do with not wanting to be a downer but also not having a lot of support. Honestly one of the things that most makes me depressed is the unreliability...
    Jaideiris Jaideiris 22-25, F 54 mins ago

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    I have worked in the medical field for a very long time in one capacity or another and whether it's a quiet bedroom for a hospice client or a busy street, I have been privy to...
    choctawgrrrl choctawgrrrl 41-45, F Mar 24