I Am Gay - Forum & Chat Board | CAN I STAY IN THE CLOSET FOREVER

Hi everyone ok first all Im a 22yr male im new to this site hence the name,

Ok I live in a small rural village in Irealnd and I know Im gay at first I was in denial for a long time and thought booze would help but it doesn't so I am at the next stage of accepting it . Ok coming out not so succesful well my familly dont agree with ''gay'' I havent told them as yet but if they see it on tv or anything there is always a negative attitude towards it and I dont want to upset them by coming out , I am also from a small commmunity in the country you know  the one where everyone know's your business anyway I feel it would completly turn my life upside down well not mine personally but my familly's.

I dont want them to be judged or my brothers to be hurt in this but I am so depressed at the min I just cant hide this anymore . I told 2 of my friends they are girls so they are cool with it but that is just 2 people.

I  sometimes think to myself ok I dont need to come out but inside its hitting me with depression just the way  I cant be myself in my own home I have to bottle it up and I know that cant be good,At times I feel scared lonely and helpless. I just need to know your thoughts and comments would be a great help

Thank you for taking your time out to read this

You CAN stay in the closet but things are just going to get harder for you.  If it comes down to it and you have to move to a different city then that's an option also.   But you have to at some point live to be yourself, If your family cannot love the person you are, then they lose out. 

You CAN stay in the closet but things are just going to get harder for you.  If it comes down to it and you have to move to a different city then that's an option also.   But you have to at some point live to be yourself, If your family cannot love the person you are, then they lose out. 

It would not be good to stay in the closet forever,as trying to hide your own feeling will in the end get to you.

I know that is is difficult to 'come out' and more so for you as you live in a small rural village.There is never any time limit on when you decide to come out,but you really need to think that one day you will need to tell your family and friends that you are gay.

If you never come out,then what you are doing is not living your life as you,and you will never be happy and content,sadly a lot of people hide their true self,it will change some lives when you finally decide to come out,and when you do your family should still love you as their son,even though they may not accept that your gay!

I wish you well now and in the future

If ever you need to chat mail me

I am 29!It;s been only 2 years i realized that am gay and am still in the closet and actually I think about ur question a lot!

It's just hard to be "different" than others, especially when ur family doesn't accept it. I live in the same situation as urs. My family has also negative attitudes about being gay!

If you Don't Come out, and you feel strong about being gay it's only going to get worse.   You should just come out and say it. It's Not a bad thing to be gay, It's Just A little weird for your peers. embrace it!

I can relate to you.

I'm gay.

I used to myself over and over I'm not gay,I'm not gay,I'm not gay!" When I couldn't fight my feelings I got upset. I met this guy and he was hot. He was new to school and he told everyone just so everyone knows I'm gay. I got know him and we became close. People called me a *** just for hanging out with him. Well one day I told Jake I was gay and we talked for a few days then we started goin out. First time I ever kissed a guy was him and I was nervous. A little over 6 months we were goin out my dad was like lets go hunting. I hate hunting because I want to be vegan. I told him I hate hunting. He's like whats wrong with you? are you gay? I didn't respond. He asked again are you gay? I tried not to bust out crying but all I could say is I don't know. He got over it though. Yeah he was mad. He was upset that the only son he had liked guys but he got over so will your family.

Can you stay in the closet forever?  You can if you want, but I would not advise it.  I am an Old gay and I knew from when I was in elementary school that I was different.  I stayed in the closet for many years.  I was a Police Officer and later a Firefighter.  No one suspected anything, but...I was always sad because I could not be myself and felt I was living a lie.

I finally came out to my parents, my then wife (soon to be my exwife), and my children.  The only ones to act negatively towards me was my mother ("God will not forgive you")and my wife.  My father and my children were great and love me for who I really am.

I say, take the leap young man.

Take care and thanks for sharing.

I am 44 and still in the closet.  I have never been kissed and have never had sex.