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I Am In a Sexless, Loveless Marriage

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 161 People

    I am married to my wife (16 yrs.

    my junior} for 11 years. She has been having an emotional affair with an ex-boyfriend since 2010. Then I came down with GBS in 2011 leaving me useless from the waist down. We have slept in separate bedroom ever since. She said in the past that she could never cheat on me...
    chuck0219 chuck0219
    56-60, M
    Feb 7, 2015

    12 Years Of Rubbish

    I have been married for 12 years for no real reason it appears. Y and I got together and all was well, she fell pregnant after 6 months and it was fine, but I should have listened more closely as she said to me at the start " I can always leave you I am better off on my own". So...
    Greensideup Greensideup
    51-55, M
    Oct 8, 2012

    Painted Love

    I drag my feet along the gravel, watching the pebbles move and scatter beneath my feet. They are being affected, I am creating a reaction, I like this feeling. It makes me feel alive, effectual in a place I often feel nothing. My reflection has become muted so to speak, shades...
    Withering Withering
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jan 10, 2013

    Staying Alive For The Baby

    My husband has not wanted to have any contact (touching, kissing, even holding my hand) since before the baby was born. Made the mistake of leaving my friends and family in 1998 to move to his city when it seemed so exciting. Made the mistake of marrying him 2 years later--even...
    brendancer brendancer
    4 Responses Aug 7, 2010

    A Question ?

    hi everyone.. i have a question, if your husband told you he loves  you sometimes. would you stay? may i add this has been a sexless and loveless marriage. he has never really been that intrested, just throws me a crumb now and then.. as if to shut me up for a while...
    clarebear73 clarebear73
    36-40, F
    4 Responses May 18, 2010

    Lack Of Emotion Is Harder That Lack Of Sex

    My story is too complex for me to properly express, and in any event, it upsets me to think too deeply about it. I've been married for 44 years and have 4 gorgeous daughters whom I adore. My wife was abused as a child, but I never learnt fully of that until about 15 years ago...
    david245 david245
    66-70, M
    Dec 29, 2012

    Where Next For A Loveless,sexless Marriage

    I am married to my second wife now of 10 years, we have a good standrd of living and fantastic familly. over the last 2 years she has gone totally of sex to the point this year we ahve not had any intamacy at all to the point I now sleep in the guest suite. she clamis she still...
    lobster1234 lobster1234
    46-50, M
    Oct 22, 2009

    Loveless Marriage

    I don't know really what to say. I have been married several times and nothing has ever worked out. I find myself in a loveless marriage and trapped because he won't leave. He is arrogant and cocky and has been mean to the point that when my son became of age he left home. We...
    madmoma madmoma
    May 16, 2012

    I Should Have Known Better....

    I have been with my husband for 20 yrs and married for 14. I should have known that it would end up like this. The signs were all there. His family did not approve of me from the beginning because he was a jewish boy marrying a redhead catholic. They made awful comments to me...
    skysmum skysmum
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Mar 8, 2013

    Just Lost...

    I am so unhappy. My jusband has no CONCEPT of love, caring, compassion. After 30 years together I am dead inside, and have almost killed myself by not caring about myself for 20 years now. Time has come to seek help. He can't or won't ever change. I have talked, cried, screamed...
    NotLiving464 NotLiving464
    46-50, F
    5 Responses Feb 14, 2012

    Heading Downhill And Gaining Speed...

    My husband and I have been married for 7.5 years. On our one month wedding anniversary, I gave him an "anniversary" card and wrote him a note about how happy I was and that I loved him and was lookign forward to spending the rest of my life with him. He took one look at it...
    jcbeene jcbeene
    36-40, F
    Mar 7, 2013

    How do I do this? How can I live with myself

    for what I have done? After meeting with my daughters counselor yesterday, she told me that my daughter, who is only 15, has known about my affair since last summer and has been holding it inside, telling no one. This has caused her great anxiety. After consulting with the...
    GreyStreet98 GreyStreet98
    51-55, F
    22 Responses Apr 29, 2014

    I Thought Things Would Get Better When He Quit Drugs And Cut Out ****, But He Still Doesn'T Want Me.

    For years I couldn't figure out what was wrong with my marriage, why I had to beg my husband to have sex with me. Things were getting worse and worse. I knew he was watching **** but I didn't know how much. I didn't really mind him watching ****, I thought it was a normal guy...
    JustHisWife JustHisWife
    Jun 13, 2013

    360 Passes - My Lesson

    All, I saw this site a year ago and have been thinking about the mission impossible. Soon, you will learn of the past year; perhaps a day at a time. 4/21/2010 I write this so that I can vent,  reflect and warn.  Most of all,  I know that after fighting...
    vandy11 vandy11
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Apr 21, 2010

    I'm tired of just existing,

    just muddling through. I met my husband when I was 21 and he was 33. We were together for 3 years before we got married. Everything was great between us during that time and for the first couple years of our marriage. He was a little controlling/overprotective but nothing out of...
    AmberDawn78 AmberDawn78
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Jun 4, 2014

    SEXLESS Marriage

    i am a 30yr old female in a 13yr old sexless relationship with a woman. although i love her vvery much and we have the best time together, i dont think i can take it anymore. she has made me feel so guilty over this. telling me how selfish i am for complaining over this. the last...
    GUS79 GUS79
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Aug 24, 2009

    Why Does It Hurt So Much?

     I have been married for 16 years to a woman that I truly adore, but no longer has feelings for me. When we first dated and then married, I wasn't really gaga over her, but the sex was good and she really, really loved me. Our marriage has never been perfect and I have been...
    cclacy cclacy
    41-45, M
    4 Responses Sep 15, 2009

    So I have a huge decision

    that needs to be made, that is giving me many sleepless nights. If you read my back story, you will understand the state of my marriage. My husband took a job in another state and my daughter, who is a Freshman in highschool does not want to leave her school or friends. I...
    GreyStreet98 GreyStreet98
    51-55, F
    6 Responses Apr 23, 2014


    ive been married for 28 yrs and the last 10 have been no sex, its at the piont now where i dont even care i just pleasure myself when im horny,which seems to be every day, and that keeps me wife says i dont try, but somewhere along the way i guess i just gave up. im...
    plasticpants01 plasticpants01
    56-60, M
    2 Responses Aug 30, 2012

    Loveless Marriage

    When I married i remember my husband said that we would always be open and honest with each other and not be like our parents who fought endless and didn't show much emotion other than anger. Sixteen years of marriage later and we are where I dreaded ending up, in a loveless...
    WantedNot WantedNot
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Jan 26, 2013

    LONG: In A Holding Pattern But Getting Very Depressed

    I've been married 5 times - that probably says something about me right there, but to me it says that I never stop hoping for a REAL marriage. I thought my third marriage was finally it. I married at 20 to a much older man and divorced after less than a year, he was a man/child...
    Ocean61 Ocean61
    56-60, F
    Nov 18, 2013

    It really is amazing how hard you can focus

    and how much effort you can put forth, when working on something that's important to you, that you truly care about. It also makes it really clear how little you care about our nonexistent sex/love life, if you made even half the effort that you have been making for this test...
    princessmaryjane4200 princessmaryjane4200
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Apr 12, 2014

    No Love, No Sex, No Nothing

    I hate my husband and cannot get away. I just hate him; he disgusts me because he doesn't bathe, yells at me all the time, calls me names, blames me for every single thing, drinks daily so he smells bad, he never has sex with me and he is a total MOOCH. No wonder we don't have...
    firewoman1969 firewoman1969
    Apr 1, 2013

    Frustration Is Slowly Killing Me.

     I have been married for nearly two years now ,  im 24 and my current condition is I am pregnant (shocker there) and my sex life has dwindled to the  equivalence of a lit lighter and has been as such pretty much since he and I have been together . I take responsibility for...
    Cookie87 Cookie87
    22-25, F
    May 3, 2012

    Another Long Day Of Ignoring Each Other.

    I wish I could bury my head in the sand and not see the situation for what it is. I wish I could deflect all of my shortcomings onto her thus absolving myself of any responsibility for a failed relationship. I'm the bad guy for retreating into my man cave of withdraw. I'm the...
    Bobahmdis Bobahmdis
    46-50, M
    2 Responses Jul 26, 2013

    Feeling Like a Prisioner of Committment

    I have been married to my husband for 22 years. We dated 5 years prior to marriage. He cheated on me and I cheated on him, but we seemed to have worked through all of that and still got married. At first, things were great. We had sex frequently, partied and just had fun together...
    Deepcrap4now Deepcrap4now
    5 Responses Jul 24, 2009

    The Red Dress

    I walk over to him to say goodbye before leaving for work. The red dress I'm wearing is shorter than usual. With matching red heels, it showcases my long, shapely legs. He laughs. I ask him why he's laughing. He responds, "Your dress is short!" Confused, I ask...
    Harley53 Harley53
    61-65, F
    18 Responses Apr 25, 2010

    Feeling Guilty For Wanting Out

    20 yrs married and 2 children who I worry about all the time because we are setting such a bad example. Our relationship is robotic honestly . . . go through the motions of everyday life . . . only talk we have is about what's going on the next day with the kids schedule-wise...
    JJHelp JJHelp
    41-45, F
    1 Response Oct 22, 2012
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