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I Am In a Sexless, Loveless Marriage

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 141 People

    SEXLESS Marriage

    i am a 30yr old female in a 13yr old sexless relationship with a woman. although i love her vvery much and we have the best time together, i dont think i can take it anymore. she has made me feel so guilty over this. telling me how selfish i am for complaining over this. the last...
    GUS79 GUS79 26-30, F 4 Responses Aug 24, 2009

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    It really is amazing how hard you can focus

    and how much effort you can put forth, when working on something that's important to you, that you truly care about. It also makes it really clear how little you care about our nonexistent sex/love life, if you made even half the effort that you have been making for this test...
    princessmaryjane4200 princessmaryjane4200 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 12

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    Another Long Day Of Ignoring Each Other.

    I wish I could bury my head in the sand and not see the situation for what it is. I wish I could deflect all of my shortcomings onto her thus absolving myself of any responsibility for a failed relationship. I'm the bad guy for retreating into my man cave of withdraw. I'm the...
    Bobahmdis Bobahmdis 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 26, 2013

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    The Red Dress

    I walk over to him to say goodbye before leaving for work. The red dress I'm wearing is shorter than usual. With matching red heels, it showcases my long, shapely legs. He laughs. I ask him why he's laughing. He responds, "Your dress is short!" Confused, I ask...
    Harley53 Harley53 56-60, F 8 Responses Apr 25, 2010

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    Loveless Marriage

    When I married i remember my husband said that we would always be open and honest with each other and not be like our parents who fought endless and didn't show much emotion other than anger. Sixteen years of marriage later and we are where I dreaded ending up, in a loveless...
    WantedNot WantedNot 41-45, F 4 Responses Jan 26, 2013

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    Just Lost...

    I am so unhappy. My jusband has no CONCEPT of love, caring, compassion. After 30 years together I am dead inside, and have almost killed myself by not caring about myself for 20 years now. Time has come to seek help. He can't or won't ever change. I have talked, cried, screamed...
    NotLiving464 NotLiving464 46-50, F 5 Responses Feb 14, 2012

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    Why Does It Hurt So Much?

     I have been married for 16 years to a woman that I truly adore, but no longer has feelings for me. When we first dated and then married, I wasn't really gaga over her, but the sex was good and she really, really loved me. Our marriage has never been perfect and I have been...
    cclacy cclacy 41-45, M 4 Responses Sep 15, 2009

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    So I have a huge decision

    that needs to be made, that is giving me many sleepless nights. If you read my back story, you will understand the state of my marriage. My husband took a job in another state and my daughter, who is a Freshman in highschool does not want to leave her school or friends. I...
    GreyStreet98 GreyStreet98 46-50, F 9 Responses Apr 23

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    Loveless Marriage

    I don't know really what to say. I have been married several times and nothing has ever worked out. I find myself in a loveless marriage and trapped because he won't leave. He is arrogant and cocky and has been mean to the point that when my son became of age he left home. We...
    madmoma madmoma 41-45 May 16, 2012

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    A Question ?

    hi everyone.. i have a question, if your husband told you he loves  you sometimes. would you stay? may i add this has been a sexless and loveless marriage. he has never really been that intrested, just throws me a crumb now and then.. as if to shut me up for a while...
    clarebear73 clarebear73 36-40, F 3 Responses May 18, 2010

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    Staying Alive For The Baby

    My husband has not wanted to have any contact (touching, kissing, even holding my hand) since before the baby was born. Made the mistake of leaving my friends and family in 1998 to move to his city when it seemed so exciting. Made the mistake of marrying him 2 years later--even...
    brendancer brendancer 46-50 4 Responses Aug 7, 2010

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    Heading Downhill And Gaining Speed...

    My husband and I have been married for 7.5 years. On our one month wedding anniversary, I gave him an "anniversary" card and wrote him a note about how happy I was and that I loved him and was lookign forward to spending the rest of my life with him. He took one look at it...
    jcbeene jcbeene 31-35, F Mar 7, 2013

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    360 Passes - My Lesson

    All, I saw this site a year ago and have been thinking about the mission impossible. Soon, you will learn of the past year; perhaps a day at a time. 4/21/2010 I write this so that I can vent,  reflect and warn.  Most of all,  I know that after fighting...
    vandy11 vandy11 36-40, M 2 Responses Apr 21, 2010

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    I Should Have Known Better....

    I have been with my husband for 20 yrs and married for 14. I should have known that it would end up like this. The signs were all there. His family did not approve of me from the beginning because he was a jewish boy marrying a redhead catholic. They made awful comments to me...
    skysmum skysmum 41-45, F 2 Responses Mar 8, 2013

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    Sexless

    ive been married for 28 yrs and the last 10 have been no sex, its at the piont now where i dont even care i just pleasure myself when im horny,which seems to be every day, and that keeps me happy.my wife says i dont try, but somewhere along the way i guess i just gave up. im...
    plasticpants01 plasticpants01 56-60, M 4 Responses Aug 30, 2012

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    Feeling Like a Prisioner of Committment

    I have been married to my husband for 22 years. We dated 5 years prior to marriage. He cheated on me and I cheated on him, but we seemed to have worked through all of that and still got married. At first, things were great. We had sex frequently, partied and just had fun together...
    Deepcrap4now Deepcrap4now 46-50 5 Responses Jul 24, 2009

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    Painted Love

    I drag my feet along the gravel, watching the pebbles move and scatter beneath my feet. They are being affected, I am creating a reaction, I like this feeling. It makes me feel alive, effectual in a place I often feel nothing. My reflection has become muted so to speak, shades...
    Withering Withering 36-40, F 1 Response Jan 10, 2013

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    Feeling Guilty For Wanting Out

    20 yrs married and 2 children who I worry about all the time because we are setting such a bad example. Our relationship is robotic honestly . . . go through the motions of everyday life . . . only talk we have is about what's going on the next day with the kids schedule-wise...
    JJHelp JJHelp 41-45, F 1 Response Oct 22, 2012

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    How do I do this? How can I live with myself

    for what I have done? After meeting with my daughters counselor yesterday, she told me that my daughter, who is only 15, has known about my affair since last summer and has been holding it inside, telling no one. This has caused her great anxiety. After consulting with the...
    GreyStreet98 GreyStreet98 46-50, F 28 Responses Apr 29

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    LONG: In A Holding Pattern But Getting Very Depressed

    I've been married 5 times - that probably says something about me right there, but to me it says that I never stop hoping for a REAL marriage. I thought my third marriage was finally it. I married at 20 to a much older man and divorced after less than a year, he was a man/child...
    Ocean61 Ocean61 51-55, F Nov 18, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Just "celebrated" our 20th anniversary. That would mean it's been about 15 years since we have had sex. It has been so long. That it's embarrassing . I'm thankful for this forum as...
    hoss350 hoss350 41-45, M 1 Response Aug 10

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    My Story Part 2 About a year I could not face the reality... I thought it all was happening to somebody else and I was just watching... at the same time my country collapsed in...
    TheFullMoon TheFullMoon 51-55, F Aug 1

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    I am sadly coming to the realization that my spouse and I never really had a marriage. We weren't even good at dating. The first Valentine's day we had an argument...I don't even...
    AshInOakland AshInOakland 41-45, M 11 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I believe some people marry to stop from being alone not caring if the make another person lonely. I have been married going on 12 years and my wife slowly started losing all...
    distant7322 distant7322 46-50, M 8 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    Hi everybody. If you've been following me, you know that I recently ended my sexless, loveless, very lonely marriage. Somebody at work today asked me if I'm enjoying the single...
    pointbreakgirl pointbreakgirl 36-40, F 15 Responses Jul 30

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    "Im in a sexless marriage but I won't cheat on my spouse." The problem you hope to never face but are never prepared to face. Often people are at the end of their rope, having...
    Happablap Happablap 26-30, M 6 Responses Jul 20

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    Moving on: I am packing up my office and my home this week. I am moving out of state and starting a new job. ( I have posted part of this update a little earlier.) But a posting...
    katzlaw katzlaw 36-40, F 10 Responses Aug 7

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    Okay, so I was on here a few days ago and told a little about my situation and history. Most people were harsh and judgmental towards me when I admitted to being the one who...
    Nil0 Nil0 46-50, F 12 Responses Jul 30

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    I just came to EP, looking for solace as a OW. I found myself looking at "I live in a sexless marriage" stories. Made me think, 49k people have something to say. Maybe, just maybe...
    greeneyes41 greeneyes41 41-45, F 1 Response a week ago

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    Hello everyone. I've not been here in over a year. If you read my other two post then I can tell you that nothing has changed. Same S different day as they say. It is now my...
    IrisROE IrisROE 56-60, F 14 Responses Aug 6

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    I am in a sexless marriage that leaves that part of me completely unsatisfied, yet i cannot leave my husband because i love and respect him in every other way... I have a very high...
    AphroditeComplex AphroditeComplex 22-25, F 9 Responses Aug 9

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    I'm a woman age 40 in a sexless marriage. Married almost four years and I bet we haven't even had sex two dozen times; sleep in separate beds, but I love him still. Well, I've...
    blondi73 blondi73 36-40, F 10 Responses 5 days ago

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    I think the problem with my sexless marriage is not the fact that it's sexless, but the fact that it's a marriage. The wedding of a non-union. What is not united should not be...
    Aeonian Aeonian 51-55, M 23 Responses Jul 24

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    I haven't had sex with my wife in almost a year. In the meantime I've cheated on her with other men about 6 times. After being not just sexless but affection less for over 6 months...
    Jasonpresten2 Jasonpresten2 31-35, M 8 Responses Aug 3

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    I live in a sexless marriage because I don't even have a husband and I'm not even married ._. ...... I live in a sexless marriage -crys
    ponycupcake ponycupcake 18-21, F 10 Responses Aug 4

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    I have an idea that will solve all of our sexless marriage problems. Let's start a sexless marriage group meeting next door to the sexaholics anonymous meeting. If were lucky it...
    hoss350 hoss350 41-45, M 9 Responses 3 days ago

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    Short comings, short sex drive, short of expressing love are all part of Sexless Marriage. Denial and refusal are very familiar. Pay attention to your spouse's messages. My s/m...
    musicinme musicinme 56-60, F 6 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Failure to Recognise RealityWhen I first came to EP, like most others, I claimed my marriage was great bar the sex. I even said that before my ex and I were married we couldn&rsquo...
    Unjusted Unjusted 36-40, F 7 Responses Jul 27

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    Seeking Therapy I’ve made my first step. I am seeing a therapist. This is not to try and repair my sexless marriage. I have realized that my sex life, the passion, the lust...
    Adam4Eve Adam4Eve 46-50, M 8 Responses Jul 24

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    Summoning Reinforcements - Those of you who have been following my story as I extract myself from the clutches of a sexless marriage know the shame my STBX has been inflicting on...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 27 Responses Jul 28

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    Hello...I just joined and I'm in a sexless marriage...UGH...I'm not really happy being in this marriage..this is not what I want in a marriage..there is no closeness with my...
    kimmmmmy kimmmmmy 41-45, F 30 Responses Aug 5

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    Here goes...I found EP doing a search about sexless marriages so here I am, my first story. I've been married 15 years to a man who in the beginning had me believing he could not...
    thescarletibis thescarletibis 41-45, F 13 Responses 5 days ago

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    Life after ILIASM I used to be a regular here. I found this group was very supportive and it really helped me regain some perspective and find the courage to leave my relationship...
    NeedingToVent NeedingToVent 36-40, F 12 Responses 1 day ago

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    Sexless Marriage is a Biblical Reason for Divorce This is a re-post of a comment I wrote to someone that TheWendigo suggested I post as a story, in case it helps anyone. I am...
    UndefinedValue UndefinedValue 31-35, F 13 Responses Jul 21

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    I am so glad I left my BS marriage! 😃 It feels great to say that I am no longer in a sexless marriage!
    pointbreakgirl pointbreakgirl 36-40, F 19 Responses Jul 24

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    Baby Steps - Once we acknowledge our sexless marriages will never improve and we need to end our dysfunctional relationships, many of us feel overwhelmed by the seemingly...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 10 Responses Jul 26

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    Does a sexless marriage makes an unhappy marriage ?
    June4U June4U 22-25, F 26 Responses Jul 27

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    I don't live in a completely sexless marriage. But I live in a marriage where I am rejected if I make the first move and we only have sex if he wants to, which is rare. This means...
    lisanalfie lisanalfie 36-40, F 27 Responses Jul 29

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    My Story Part 1 I joined the group shortly after I decided what I do about my sexless marriage. I did not need to vent but just wanted some communication and the only one...
    TheFullMoon TheFullMoon 51-55, F 1 Response Aug 1