I Am In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 338 People

    "Does he ever hit you?

    " I have been asked that so often, and I always say "no..." but I am thinking: "well he doesn't hit me but...he pushes me, grabs hold of my arms so hard it leaves bruises... he has pushed me to the floor, sat on me so I can't get up...pushed my face to the floor, leaving...
    deleted deleted
    4 Responses May 17, 2014

    I'm Used To It

    If I don't do the laundry, I'll be screamed at. If I complain about anything, its obviously my fault. If I stand up for myself things start getting thrown. If she hits me, its ok. If I hit back I'm the man and get jail threats. If I cry about it for days, maybe I should have...
    senmetsu senmetsu
    22-25, M
    4 Responses Nov 13, 2009

    I don't know what to do.

    This is my first real relationship and it started when I was 17, I think it took a lot of time for me to figure out how deeply wrong this relationship really is because I never had a functional one before. We've been together three years now. I had just started college when we...
    mdmrmdmr mdmrmdmr
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jun 22, 2015


    I'm not positive about what would constitute for what is "abuse" and what is just being mean. But this is my story and I want to tell it. It Hasn't't been long at all, just shy of seven months. I wish I could say I did't see his attitude coming, that I had no idea what he was...
    Devinspade Devinspade
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 23, 2011

    It's not as easy as saying just leave.

    .. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and after 6-9 months of dating him he started to physically grab me and hurt me. He also calls me names all the time and puts me down. I don't know what to do anymore because we have a 2 month old son together and I'm currently a stay at...
    forrest1027 forrest1027
    18-21, F
    5 Responses Dec 23, 2015

    I have recently taken a break from my boyfriend.

    The fight we had days ago, still makes me feel numb; we haven't talked since. And here I am, looking at my phone, wondering if we will ever talk again. So what caused this? (It's two parts! Sorry for it being so long) I. About a month ago, my male friend invited me to...
    Realitymeetsbliss Realitymeetsbliss
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Apr 21, 2015

    For Those Who Think That They Can Change Their Lover If...

    They will not change if you behave better. They will not change if you yell back. They will not change if you love them more. They will not change if you become spiteful. They will not change if you talk less. They will not change if you do exactly what they say...
    NoWhereToGoButUp NoWhereToGoButUp
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Feb 12, 2010


    So many people use the word love without ever knowing what it means. Love doesn't mean hurt, anger and sadness. It means caring, thoughtful, kindness. I can tell you all that I am living proof that abuse is an endless cycle. I grew up with an abusive father. Every relationship...
    thecalm1 thecalm1
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Apr 5, 2009


    I met my boyfriend when I was 18 and he was 38 at our work 3 years ago. I remember the first time I saw him, I was new and he came up to me and said hi. First it was a crush, then I really liked him and after our first date we were a couple. The beginning was so magical and...
    DeniseS21 DeniseS21
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Oct 28, 2013

    hey threatens to kill me

    when I try to leave and I have no where to go. my throat is bruised and sore from my attempt yesterday.
    minglish83 minglish83
    41-45, F
    2 Responses May 29, 2015

    Today is the start of acceptance.

    It's really hard to feed yourself a poop sandwich. But I guess it's better than feeding yourself somebody else's poop sandwich and acting as if you like it. She is who she is and can't be different when she wont see what she is doing. And maybe it's just that I'm the one who has...
    Canadastamina Canadastamina
    Dec 17, 2015

    I want to leave but then again I don't.

    . He says he's sorry and that he loves me and it'll never happen again. But I just don't know. I'm confused by his actions.
    rileynicole rileynicole
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Dec 30, 2014

    I'm scared. I can't get out of it

    but I want to so badly. No one even listens to me anymore. They say it's my fault I'm in this situation. It's my fault I'm sad everyday. They don't understand. They don't understand that I can't leave. Then again, I don't even understand it. How can I expect them to if I don't...
    AmieBeth AmieBeth
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Dec 26, 2013

    Hi. I'm 20 years old girl.

    I am in an abusive relationship. Just the thing is... I'm an aggressor. I know myself how bad it is. And I feel so disgusted with myself. So low on myself. We had our relationship blooming and everything was fine. I loved him. He loved me. And then I became jealous. It consumed...
    Eyeyem Eyeyem
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 21, 2015

    In An Abusive Relationship

    but i dont want to get out. I want this to work out and I believe in his change. He is not even my boyfriend but we have been lovers on and off for about 8 months. I saw the signs early so I began pulling away but the more I get away the more I miss him. I just dont want to be...
    fantasiamoon fantasiamoon
    26-30, F
    6 Responses Jul 24, 2010

    PART4: I knew deep down

    that this wasn't right and something was wrong. He began pinching my legs really hard when I made him angry. And from there he began spitting on me. And from that he began punching and kicking me. Did I leave though? Nope. One day when he was doing his daily accusations I got so...
    Sh318y Sh318y
    22-25, F
    1 Response Mar 14, 2016

    I Am Just Curious,why Do You Stay?

    I know this is one of those frequently asked questions,but I'm curious. Why do you stay with someone who hurts you? I mean,I love my husband,but if he ever did what some of you women say your husband does to you,I wouldn't hang around. I just don't get it. You say love him. Don't...
    berrybunny berrybunny
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Nov 8, 2012

    I Have No Mouth,and I Must Scream

    It once was good,then it was bad,then it was great,but only for a short time,then it was really bad,and now it's as bad as it's ever been. I usually know how to tone down his anger. I'm finely attuned to what makes him want to throw down. I can control the situation,at least...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Nov 7, 2012

    Someday She Will Get Away

    She lays alone and cries into her pillow feeling lost trapped stuck and afraid. She's afraid to leave and afraid to stay, and she wonders to herself if she will ever get away. He knows just how to make her feel useless he knows just how to cause her pain. He keeps her needing...
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Nov 29, 2013

    Shoulda Woulda Coulda

    I've been with Carl for almost 8 years.. Things have gone from bad to worse. Of course at first he was picture perfect. He was always so nice and polite, and would listen to every word I said. Everything slowly changed when his Mom asked us to take over his Uncle's home as his...
    ms204604650 ms204604650
    26-30, F
    1 Response Aug 27, 2012

    everyone please pray

    for me to find the strength to leave him before i end up dead. it's really bad:(
    mfox3579 mfox3579
    36-40, F
    10 Responses Nov 26, 2014

    I've Been Told It Is

    My bf and I have been dating for about a year and 9-10 months. We met each other at a lil party were we basically got drunk and had a one night stand. He called me a week later. We were going out for about 11 months and the by the 9th month he started to become more of a...
    Pagangirl Pagangirl
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Jul 8, 2009

    My wife. Controlling

    and emotionally abusive. She has no idea either. I'm strong on the outside. But inside I'm sick of it. She doesn't even know how horrible she is because I take it day after day. But I'm tired.
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses May 26, 2015

    It Can't Be All My Fault!

    I have been in an abusive on-off relationship for three years. We have been together exclusively the past year, before that it was a couple months here and there. We have a two year old son. This last time we got back together, I made that decision because he begged me and I...
    mad04h mad04h
    9 Responses Jul 3, 2008

    Isolated And Depressed, But Freedom Is In Sight!

    So I met my husband five years ago and I must have been on some serious drugs or something. I was 19, he was 31 and lived on his friends couch. He had no job, was on parole with an extensive criminal record and a 13 year old kid that he didn't take care of. I met him at a party...
    acanteloupe acanteloupe
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jul 11, 2013

    married 3 years.. first year was amazing,

    everything I hoped my life would be... the last 2 years has been horrible, I've been being physically and emotionally abused and beaten down into a worthless mess by him.. I recently started cheating just to save my sanity and met an amazing guy who knows I'm married and who...
    xLollipopChainsaw xLollipopChainsaw
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 6, 2016

    Why is it so hard to leave

    when it is you? I'm reading through everyone else's experiences, and while different, still very similar. I say to myself "if that were me I would call the cops" but why don't I? When I'm the one crying, why don't I? When I have the bruises, being pushed, bite, slapped...
    nyqc86 nyqc86
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Mar 6, 2016

    But Still, I Stay ....

    Obviously he's been hitting me but never my face .... had my first miscarriage because him and he made me have an abortion . but i stay because i don't know what else to do . he makes me feel so small and young ... he's older way older . i love him i know he loves me but it's...
    AubriannaMiShelle AubriannaMiShelle
    18-21, F
    7 Responses Oct 8, 2012

    Been there. Done that.

    Survived it. Never again!
    picklebobble picklebobble
    51-55, M
    Jan 21, 2015

    Never Again!

    It took years of my ex telling me how worthless I was for the pain and anger to erase my fear.  For years I heard how fat and ugly I was, how lucky I was to have him because no one else will ever want me. At night he reminded me about the 22mm that he kept under my bed. He...
    NoWhereToGoButUp NoWhereToGoButUp
    36-40, F
    29 Responses Jan 26, 2010

    Am I Being Abused????

    I am 21 and engaged. We been together for almost 3 years. Every time we get into an argument he calls me really bad names like the B word, a psycho and he even called me an ugly mfer, he also said how he can't take me anywhere and how he wished I was off the face of the earth...
    alexis122 alexis122
    18-21, F
    48 Responses Sep 22, 2013

    my boyfriend has spoken to over 100 others

    girls during our 1 year and 5 month relationship, he's verbally abusive, he tells me no one wants me, hopes i die, hopes i kill myself, tells me i'm worthless, calls me every name under the sun, every nasty thing you could possibly say to someone he has said to me. He's slapped...
    mxlly mxlly
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Aug 21, 2015

    I hate when people say "just leave",

    "you need to leave", "leaving is the only option." I've heard this a thousand times, maybe a million. I cannot "just leave". I love him. To death. He's the only person who's ever made me feel ANYTHING. I gave my all to him, absolutely everything. I promised him my love, my life...
    Bustedxx Bustedxx
    22-25, F
    1 Response Sep 29, 2015

    PART 4: The police came

    and deemed it as a domestic violence situation. He was charged with assault and so was I for throwing my cell phone..... 😑😑. From there I dealt with court dates and finally I was made a deal that if I went into intensive therapy for people who abuse their partners then my...
    Sh318y Sh318y
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Mar 14, 2016

    I really thought my boyfriend was different

    but i guess we all do at one point. He started pushing me when he was upset which after the first tike promised he would never do again and he slept upstairs for a few nights and bought me gifts to say sorry and i eventually forgave him and then it started to get worse and he...
    tengomiedo tengomiedo
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Jan 21, 2015

    I hit my girlfriend, she is 16,

    i hate it and i try hard to stop, but i cant do it. She so sweet and is trying her best to stay with me and help me. I just have a bad temper
    RealManMark RealManMark
    18-21, M
    3 Responses Mar 9, 2015

    I wrote this about my life,

    my child....my friend asked me to post it here, in hopes it would help someone going through the same thing...If you are i beg you, get out but do it in a safe manner, make a plan with someone you can trust, and get out safely...you or you're children need not hurt one more day...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses May 25, 2015

    After putting up with this stuff

    for 11 months, today I realized that it wasn't right..
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Apr 9, 2015

    I am so glad that my boyfriend

    and I have the great relationship that we have. I never have to worry about him straying to other girls especially sneaking around or lying. I never get the urge to check his phone or computer because there wouldn't be inappropriate conversations. When I go to my friends or...
    deleted deleted
    Jan 28, 2015

    we have been together

    for 2 yrs before getting pregnant he had punched the wall then a later arguemnt he head butt me, then kept escalating went to pining me down like a man, pushing me, then slapped me. I would forgive and believed that it wouldnt happen agaim. Things are great when hes not angry my...
    agl0218 agl0218
    22-25, F
    Jun 1, 2015

    PART 1: This is a long story

    so I will probably post multiple parts. I guess I will call this part 1. When I was 18 I had low self esteem and I didn't think much of myself. In my mind I believed I was ugly and I was never good enough. I went out with one of my friends one night to the movie theatre and one...
    Sh318y Sh318y
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Mar 14, 2016

    PART 2: Soon after that he began to compare me

    to girls who were much "better and prettier" than me. This made me feel so awful and even when I cried In front of him because I felt so horrid he didn't stop he continued to compare me to other girls as I cried. He shamed me for looking the way I did. I began to make drastic...
    Sh318y Sh318y
    22-25, F
    1 Response Mar 14, 2016

    If Only It Would Work, Right?

    Its not all his fault, I taught him how to smoke meth, taught him how I liked to be choked during sex, introduced him to the overall unstable majority of mankind. But now, although I can see the beautiful strong, capable man he once was and has potential for he sees nothing other...
    deiselshake deiselshake
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jan 11, 2011

    She tells me how much she loves me & she can't

    be without me. I'm so amazing & perfect to her...blah blah blah. Oh but I'm fat, I don't treat people well, I'm conceited, I'm unattractive and no one cares about me. I don't love her enough I'm just like a man, emotionally unattached & uncaring. Nothing I do is right or good...
    Fiftypercent Fiftypercent
    1 Response Jul 1, 2015

    I am writing this having read a post from a man

    who is in an abusive relationship....I have read so many stories from women but it is not just women that are victims of domestic violence. Many men are in this situation, and as hard as it is for women to get help it is often much harder for men. Many men feel that if they...
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Nov 11, 2014

    Welp i've been in a abusive relationship

    for about a year now, but the hitting started about 7 months ago, it wasn't as bad at first- but now its gotten to the point where every inch of my body has a bruise bigger than my fist, i am walking around with black eyes, I CANT HAVE A PHONE because they are all broken by him...
    itsjustlifex itsjustlifex
    22-25, F
    9 Responses Mar 31, 2015

    I don't get it. It try

    so hard to just have a good day. Even when we have a good day at the end of the night it's like he doesn't even know me. I'm just dropped. I feel used. I never get a goodnight text like we used to. Nothing he just tells me to leave him alone. I'm so upset. So hurt so lonely. I...
    somegirl117 somegirl117
    3 Responses Jun 27, 2014

    when my women gets mad she beats the **** out

    of me. I'm running out of excuses whenever I'm asked how'd I get the scars
    mundinger1992 mundinger1992
    22-25, M
    5 Responses Feb 11, 2015

    My husband berates me in front of my daughter,

    he also says filthy things so she can hear them The language he uses is worse than any sailor He has thrown objects and hit me leaving huge black and purple bruising, he says he fantasizes about killing me I've put thousands of dollars into his home and am disabled
    applepielady applepielady
    1 Response Apr 9, 2015

    PART 5: I didn't actually leave

    until today actually. I was so tired and emotionally drained from all of his bs. I'm 21 now and I've been with him since I was 18. I spent way too many years wasting my time with someone like him. I have no one to talk to about this because there is a stigma surrounding domestic...
    Sh318y Sh318y
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Mar 14, 2016

    Are You Ready?

    Are you ready to leave? Maybe you know you're in deep trouble, maybe you suspect the relationship can not be saved, but you're just not quite ready to make the break? That's OK, don't be hard on yourself. Even if you have friends and family urging you to get the hell outta there...
    Vivagalore Vivagalore
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Mar 24, 2012

    PART 3: Things only got worse from there.

    He became controlling. He controlled everything I did such as where I went and who I was aloud to talk to. I wasn't a person anymore I was property if that makes sense. He would go through my phone and my social media accounts and accuse me of cheating daily even though I never...
    Sh318y Sh318y
    22-25, F
    1 Response Mar 14, 2016

    I want to divorce but am worried about my

    child's emotional feelings after divorce and don't know if I'll be able to cope up with my child feeling torn between two parents. I take the abuse and bruises to keep a smile on my child's face but I don't think I can let this continue for long... I feel crippled and please it...
    batteredlife batteredlife
    36-40, F
    1 Response Feb 19, 2016
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