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I Am Jamaican

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 5,118 People

    Jamaicanology

    A jamaican boat man and a tourist were out crusing the river one day. The tourist being very educated turned to the boat man and asked"do u know Biology, Geology, Physcology or Criminalogy?" The poor boat man says"NO SIR", being rude the tourist replies"then what the hell you...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 28, 2013

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    10 Annoying Behaviors Of Jamaicans

    #10 IF YOU GIVE/HELP YOU ARE THE BOSS!..MI RATE YUH/ A GOOD YUTE MAN, ..IF YOU DONT..YUH MEAN RASS..GWEH!! ..D F*CKA MEAN!!..."YAH PU55YHOLE"..GWEH!! MEK SURE YOU NUH ASK MI FI NOTTEN!! #9."KISS DEM TEETH" @ ANYTHING DEM CANT BADDA WID..EVEN DEM BOSS! #8. QUICK FI TELL ANYBODY...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Aug 21, 2012

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    My First Kiss

    I look back on this day and regret it. But then again it's great to say "I already had my first kiss". So here it goes. I had a crush on this boy since the 2nd grade. Silly me asked him out in 7th grade, knowing he was a druggie, that we never talked and that he was my bestie's...
    GoTheDistance GoTheDistance 13-15, F Sep 27, 2012

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    Snake In The Pants

    A girl posted an advertisment in the newspaper sayin.I NID A HUSBAND WHO WIL NEVA BEAT ME,LEAVE ME AND WILL SATISFY ME IN BED...the next day,a drunk man with no legs and arms knocked her door. Girl:what do u want? Man:i want to be ua husband Girl:u dont fit for that. Man:i have...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F 3 Responses Oct 28, 2013

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    White Gal

    Jamaica is first on my list of places to visit! I need a recipe for jerk chicken too
    TreeHuggingHippie000 TreeHuggingHippie000 41-45, F 3 Responses Oct 28, 2013

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    I'M Half Jamaican

    I am a lot if stuff lol ok so my mothers family is Jamaican but my grandparents moved to England and had their kids there and my mom was born their but her heritage is Jamaican . My mother mother is maroon decent ( African tribe who were runaway slaves and moved to the islands...
    Loving1234 Loving1234 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 2, 2013

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    Getting To Know You

    I was told by my paternal grandmother that my greatgrandfather came from J'ca to Florida. No one knows if this is true, I do know, that the first time I landed in MoBay, I really felt as if I were home. Like I never felt it before or since. I am African-American, but I feel...
    JahDawta JahDawta 41-45 2 Responses May 15, 2010

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    Jamaican Lawyer Joke

    Jamaican lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they're not prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Falmouth small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grand motherly, elderly woman named Miss Ivy to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Miss Ivy do...
    ollifer ollifer 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 15, 2011

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    I am so Jamaican - I remember bully beef,

    hard dough bread in the morning for breakfast. I am so Jamaican - I remember roasting Jack Fruit seed. I am so Jamaican - I walked barefoot and climbed Tamarind trees.
    MAROONTRIBE MAROONTRIBE 41-45, M Jul 25

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    "Trelawny mi born and grow Nuff Sufferation No

    Boy Ago Choke, But Me Na Give Up Because I'm Multi-Talented" haha, I absolutely love where Im from.
    TheVisualist TheVisualist 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 14

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    Impossible

    A 90 year old man marries an 18yr old woman and goes to a doctor. MAN: My 18 year wife is pregnant, your opinion doctor? Dr Blaze: ok, Let me tell you a story..A hunter in a hurry, grabs an umbrella instead of a gun. He moves into the jungle, sees a lion, lifts the umbrella...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 28, 2013

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    The Jamaican On A Ship

    On a ship an American, an English man, and a Jamaican were sailing. Suddenly the Devil appeared and said, "Drop something in the sea; if I find it I will eat you ... If I can't, then I will be your slave!" The American dropped a diamond. The Devil quickly found it and ate him...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Apr 21, 2012

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    I'm half Jamaican both my parents were born in

    Jamaica, but I was born in America.
    woahfooddd woahfooddd 13-15, F May 4

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    The Truth

    I was born in manhattan new York. But as a baby and growing I would always travel back and fourth from Jamaica to here. Also when I was about 11 was sent back to Jamaica for good. I went to primary school and I went to frome technical high school. Going to the beach, hanging out...
    Rashawn48 Rashawn48 22-25, M Mar 5, 2012

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    Moved to ny when i was 12

    but i will never forget those simple days and that simple life back home. I always try to visit as much as i could and keep in touch with my family and friends love you JA.
    Blakeja Blakeja 22-25, M Jan 13

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    My parents are Jamaica

    and mover to the US about a year before I was born. Some of the stuff that they did seemed so backwards to me. It was like living in two different worlds, but I'm glad my parents are who they are and I'm proud that they are from Jamaica.
    cthunder06 cthunder06 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 2

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    Jamaican & Trini - Look In De Freezer

    A Jamaican and a Trinidadian, waiting at the pearly gate, strike up a conversation. How yu dead?" the Trinidadian man asked the Jamaican. "Me freeze to death man," says the Jamaican. "That's awful, how it feel fi freeze to death?" asked the Trinidadian. "Well bredda it very...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 21, 2012

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    Blackmail

    A Jamaican man became desperate after praying to god to help him, so he decided to write to god instead. He wrote "gad mi tiad fi pray an yuh nah ansa mi sometime mi wanda if you caan hear mi suh mi tink it betta if mi write yuh caa mi kno yuh wi read it. Gad mi bruk an only a...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Aug 21, 2012

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    You know your Jamaican

    when your child ask you to sharpen a pencil an you do it with a knife.
    Litiia Litiia 22-25, F 4 Responses Feb 14

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    "only In Jamaica "

    Only in Jamaica, citizens have to protect police from gunman. Only in Jamaica, you'll have police cars parked at rum bars. Only in Jamaica, can people strike everyday just not to go to work. Only in Jamaica, gal fat up demself wid foul pill and bleach out dem skin wid toothpaste...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 18, 2012

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    Love reggae! ( black uhru; Sponji Reggae.

    ..favorite song!) Red, green, yellow, and black are my favorite colors. I can speak creole as well!
    BrokenGirl973 BrokenGirl973 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 12

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    Dumb Blonde

    A man walks into a pub with his pet alligator. He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons. “I’ll make you a deal. I’ll open this alligator’s mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute. He’ll then...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 28, 2013

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    I'm From Negril Jamaica And I Had A Movie Making Dream...

    I grew up in Jamaica. In Negril, specifically.  And when I was a child as young as 5.  I used to walk along the beach and dream of one day making movies.  I grew up very poor and feared it would never happen.  I would day dream and turn people I met into...
    JamaicanMovies JamaicanMovies 26-30, F 1 Response Oct 28, 2010

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    Any Good Jamaican Cooking Tips For A Novice Cook?

    I   just  looove  to eat Jamaican foods !  I would love to learn just how to cook Jamaican foods from scratch. Can someone give me some advice, suggestions  and / or  homecooking tips?   What  about  any good  home health remedies?   (I  just joined this site a few...
    peddle peddle 41-45 3 Responses Apr 5, 2011

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    100%...i Guess Lol

    Most poeple don't think im jamaican but most jamaicans can realize that i am for some reason. Most pple think im llike hispanic or something, or im a mix. Anyways, i was born and raised in JA, and moved to the US like 6 years ago. I guess im unique, cuz most jamaicans don't look...
    unstablemind101 unstablemind101 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 8, 2008

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    Love Being Jamaican

    It fills me with so much pride and joy to know my little Country is so well loved because of Our Culture, People and Way of Life. We're gonna kick some serious *** in Track and Field/Athletics at London 2012 games. Goooo!!! Usain Bolt, Goooo!!! Veronica Campbell Brown, Goooo...
    sunnygurl sunnygurl 18-21 1 Response Aug 1, 2012

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    Run Fat Boy, Run!

    A fat man saw advertisement "lose 5kg in a week". He called & said I would like to join! The lady in charge said to him Lady: Ok! Be ready tomorrow at 6am. Next morning, the fat man gets to the office and he was taken to a room. He opens the door & finds a hot babe with...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 28, 2013

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    Jamaican Vs American English!

    USA: It's been a long time since I have seen you girl... .JAM: Gyal, you noh dead yet? USA: Oh Lord, we have lost electricity again. JAM: Lawd Gad... current lock awff again to rahtid! USA: This meal is not too bad JAM: Di food cyan eat USA: Where did you buy that awful...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses May 18, 2012

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    Love Being Jamaican To Bumboclaat :)

    Being a mixed has it benefits, but i consider myself 100% Jamaican ok (u zeet). Our way of life n culture is simple fascinating. Our accent, the way in which us females move our bodies,our beauty n self confidence. I wudnt have it any other way. Dont get started on our food, damn...
    ImAWomanScorned4ever ImAWomanScorned4ever 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 15, 2012

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    1/2 Jamaican And I Love It

    wah gwan! yep i'm half jamaican and i'm proud of it listening to my grandmother tell me stories and the history of such a rich culture makes me appreciate being apart of it even more from the patois to the dutty wine the mannish water and all i love it and wouldnt change it for...
    ayooxjaelyn ayooxjaelyn 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 4, 2013

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    Surprises

    A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. So he decides to try it out at dinner. DAD: Son, where were you today during school? SON: At school *robot slaps son* SON: Ok, I went to the movies. DAD: Which one? SON: Toy Story *robot slaps son again* SON: Ok, it was A...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 28, 2013

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    Why I Still Struggle....

    I kno wht I am!!! But according to ppl ever since I was little: I'm too light skin to be Jamaican!??!.... Here's the deal- my dad was born in Jamaica some bijillion years ago, while my mom was born in America. My dads parents migrated to the states where my dad met my mom. Then...
    NoSleepPeep12 NoSleepPeep12 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 1, 2013

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    The Part Of Me That'S Jamaican

    I am Part Jamaican my grandfather is from Jamaica my mothers father .... My mom is from New Orleans . My dad is partially Italian . I love having Jamaican in my family it's so unique and not that many people are part Jamaican. :)
    mstv1112 mstv1112 13-15, F 1 Response May 13, 2013

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    Actually I am Jamerican.

    I'm sure many are familiar with the term.Im the only American born in my home but Identify more with Jamaican culture.All of my friends are Jamaican or Jamerican.It may sound strange but I just don't feel I can really connect with black American culture.Its kind of strange...
    Jamericangal Jamericangal 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 27

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    Looking For A Black Girl

    i m honey young man. looking for a girl where i can say dirty talks easyly.
    madjaguar madjaguar 26-30, M May 12, 2013

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    I Am Jamrish

    I'm half Jamaican and half Irish , aint that a fiery mix and I'm proud of it . People who have a problem with it I dont know about that . All I know is that if it caused me problems then I'm bigger and better fo it. Back in the day in England ( the 50's) there were'nt many black...
    martianess martianess 51-55, F 5 Responses Sep 2, 2008

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    Black and Proud

    This poem was inspired by Genesis 1:26 and 27     Lord, Lord, Why did you make me black? Why did you make me someone the world wants to hold back?   Black is the colour of dirty clothes; the colour of grimy hands and feet.   Black is the colour of darkness...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Jan 2, 2009

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    Wow

    lots of jamaicans on here :O
    unstablemind101 unstablemind101 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 29, 2010

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    Is there any Jamaican woman here

    that lives on the east coast, or in the NYC area?
    MAROONTRIBE MAROONTRIBE 41-45, M Jul 8

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    I Was Held Back A Grade

    I am 14, I am still not in highschool! When people hear that, that inply that I'm stupid. That I wasn't smart enough so I had to repeat a year of school. Nope! I was born in New York. When I got older I moved to Jamaica to live with my mother and I completed 1st grade there. Then...
    GoTheDistance GoTheDistance 13-15, F 1 Response Sep 28, 2012

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    Right Mon,

    Dis place a mi born. Dis mi second home tah where mi live now truth! Okay let me stop, so I'm Jamaican, my whole family is. I was the last person born in Jamaica out of my family :]. But we all moved, and we all still visit Jamaica every now and then... but we're all Jamaican...
    WiltingBlossom WiltingBlossom 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 4, 2010

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    Zavia93 Zavia93 18-21, M Aug 15

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    Related Experiences

    It has a very light rear-taste that lasts into the gut and esophagous
    psycopower90 psycopower90 22-25, M Aug 23

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    Very light (0 calories), tasty and peppery, healthy and furthermore only 1 pound for 1.3 liters!
    psycopower90 psycopower90 22-25, M Aug 29

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    We don't get to choose our families unfortunately. If we did it would be nice though. I come from a very unaccepting, judgmental, conditional love sort of family and recently it...
    crystalc1973 crystalc1973 36-40, F 1 hr ago

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    Irrespective of whether lounging inside of a hammock beneath swaying palm trees, teeing off for the personal eighteen-hole golf training course, or walking together pristine beach...
    Lillafyq Lillafyq 31-35, M Aug 22

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    Im a white guy, but would you believe me if I said that I know exactly what African americans feel when they are discriminated. That's right, I didn't think it odd but apparently...
    Emprosium Emprosium 18-21 Aug 19

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    Can a spot named right after a casual pair of shoes be described as a bastion of luxury? You far better think it. These beachfront all-inclusive resorts hug azure waters, and boast...
    Benitakey Benitakey 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 22

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    El Dorado Maroma is tiny in dimension, large on facilities and service. This all-inclusive boutique-type luxurious vacation resort offers a impressive placing on Maroma Seaside for...
    Denisstu Denisstu 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 23

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    I am half Jamaican, a quarter German and a quarter Armenian. People day I look Hispanic or Arab.
    PandaGirl17 PandaGirl17 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 23

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    Can an area named right after an informal set of footwear become a bastion of luxurious? You greater feel it. These beachfront all-inclusive resorts hug azure waters, and boast...
    Paul18nj Paul18nj 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 26

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    He told her it was the Milky Way. Then, from nowhere, a star shot through the dark as if it had been hurled, and then snapped out of sight. ‘Did you see that?’ He grabbed her...
    xxRoom101xx xxRoom101xx 41-45, M 2 Responses Aug 31