I Am Losing Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 763 People

    How come the thought of being unhealthy makes me

    so happy? Eating disorder. Self harm. Smoking? Why does it all make me "happy" God I'm so ****** up...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    1 Response Mar 11, 2015

    How can I be so ****** up

    that I fear happiness... I fear that one day I'll be happy... How the **** does that even make sense?!?!
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    1 Response Mar 4, 2015

    I feel like disappearing.

    Going to find a dive bar. A sad sad dive bar.
    AndreiTarkovsky AndreiTarkovsky
    26-30, M
    1 Response Apr 17, 2014

    I don't know how to feel at all I feel like

    it's my fault he's worse than before but I'm not sure What if he dies? Then what? I'll feel like it's all my fault and blame myself for everything but even more so I wish feeling were more straight forward
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Sep 26, 2015

    I feel as if I'm losing everything I know how

    to be. I've lost all my motivation and feel like I'm just clinging onto a memory of who I used to be. I'm all alone and feel as if I'm being looked at like I'm not even human, just some unwanted mutt that's only a burden. I really don't know what to do. I see myself failing...
    Zestyginge Zestyginge
    22-25, M
    3 Responses May 6, 2014

    Losing Hope

    I woke up this morning and for some reason all of my hope was gone. I realized that no matter how much I make plans and delude myself that things will change, they most likely never will. I'll continue to live in this shithole town, work some meaningless job, never further my...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Oct 27, 2009

    I don't even know who I am anymore.

    I feel like I'm drowning in a sea of what everyone wants me to be. I'm sick of it.
    DayDreamingDragon DayDreamingDragon
    22-25, F
    1 Response Feb 9, 2015

    It's been an week I'm going crazy,

    my gf is ready to leave me,as her family is about to reject the proposal for marriage which my parent sent........reason for it is love marriage with ruin the status in community and respect will go down,she say to be ready what the outcome may be.....she is ready to except what...
    vegeta420 vegeta420
    26-30, M
    1 Response Mar 9, 2015


    First of all I'm sorry if I make some grammar mistake but I'm Italian, so.. I've always been good at school, and I also graduate with honors, and even if my private life always sucked I really didn't care much. Then I choose to study mathematics and the first year was good, I...
    moonsoul7 moonsoul7
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Apr 30, 2012

    Gonna go home and get drunk by myself.

    These voices are getting to be too much for me today!!! :(
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    1 Response Feb 19, 2015

    I try so very hard, and I used to be good too.

    At literally everything, tennis, school, competitions, but now it seems like I'm losing every one of those talents, I try even harder, but then I drop even faster. People think I'm dumb, the fake appreciation isn't wanted, and my parents. That's the worst, I let them down over...
    Sappi1 Sappi1
    16-17, F
    Sep 26, 2015

    Slowly drifting away into pure darkness

    and no one can save me; not even myself.
    crystalrosie crystalrosie
    22-25, F
    Oct 14, 2015
    deleted deleted
    Aug 17, 2014

    When you say, "I can't"

    and expect the worst, you become weak and unhappy." "When you say "I can", and expect success, you fill yourself with confidence and happiness." "Reading a few positive thinking quotes before going to sleep at night, and first thing in the morning, will gradually change your...
    ApacheKuruk ApacheKuruk
    46-50, M
    1 Response Apr 20, 2015

    I don't think I'm depressed

    but I have a problem. My mom will be taking me to a counselor so I can get some help. Each time she finds me crying and asks what the problem is I never want to tell her. How could I tell her she's the problem? Thing is she's a good mom but one of the reasons why I'm not okay...
    AnonymousJSS AnonymousJSS
    16-17, F
    1 Response Jul 31, 2015

    I will always be the one

    that gave up. The one that ran away. The one who surrendered. No one will understand why I did it. No one will know the story. No one will know what went through my head. No one will even be at my side. It is comforting to know that it will be easier for them to be angry at me...
    deidei27 deidei27
    22-25, M
    Jun 9, 2015

    Today as I woke up, I started thinking.

    "Who am I" I thought it was something simple to think of. I realize now that it isn't. I really don't know who I am anymore. I know I don't have anyone and basically get anything I want, but I can't see myself. I can't see what I was and what I will become. Things are...
    Aoiberry Aoiberry
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Dec 3, 2013
    NogoodElizabeth NogoodElizabeth
    18-21, F
    Aug 16, 2015

    Before I cross my heart

    and hope to die at all Take off my mask and leave the lies to the liars Before I close my eyes I'm gonna give it up Take off my mask and leave the lies to the liars
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    Apr 26, 2015

    You actually had me reconsidering everything

    again I feel i need something like you But i know i must be wrong. How can he be a part of my life while still holding everything else i believe and need You tempt and tease me so Do you know what you do at all? Sometimes i just need a parent again because im a lost child...
    Saddiie Saddiie
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Oct 29, 2014

    I've just realized nothing makes me excited

    anymore.. Wish I was a child again. Life was simple and there weren't as many let downs..
    shefreckles shefreckles
    26-30, F
    Oct 28, 2015

    and my mind. I can see my old self just gripping

    for dear life, with her arms wrapped around my hips begging me to get better. the problem is, I don't really recognize her. i haven't been happy in sooo so long, I've nearly forgotten what it even feels like. I'm afraid if I lose myself completely I'll just be gone, a vegetable...
    mentallyhigh mentallyhigh
    22-25, F
    Feb 28, 2016

    Finding yourself bound by expectations,

    relationships, responsibility - all these can stretch yourself in different directions that one day you'll find that you have no idea who you are, no idea what your purpose is and no idea why you're trying so hard. I had this moment today. It was such a struggle to get through...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Dec 14, 2015

    everyday im losing confidence,

    happiness, friends and being social. its just feels like i lost light in my life. im not who i used to be anymore. so what do i do in my daily life? nothing. just nothing. hopeless. nothing. im so tired. so many questions.. should i commit suicide or just hold on? im tired of...
    skymeatsix skymeatsix
    16-17, F
    May 31, 2015

    Everyday I wake up, I can sense

    that I am drifting farther away. The world slowly devolves from the bright happy place it used to be, to a grey mass of nothingness. I've wandered too far from the path and into the woods surrounding. The trees now block my way and the fog engulfs me so that I cannot see. My...
    LoneDragon99 LoneDragon99
    13-15, F
    1 Response Jun 28, 2014

    yesterday my band teacher,

    fagner, was trying to get us to pit more emotion into our music. ive gotten to where i don't show anything anymore. he then went on to say that bad things will happen to us in our lives, and we should find a release for it, otherwise we'll be self destructive, or worse. well...
    zydeko zydeko
    Mar 5, 2015

    I am showing signs of schizophrenia.

    .. I never wanted to believe it... I see things that aren't there... There's voices in my head... I feel sensations on my skin as if there were bugs crawling on me. But there's not. Sometimes it feels like someone is putting their hand on me... I feel like I'm losing myself...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Mar 22, 2015

    Its not a bad thing really.

    As long as you focus in improving yourself. A few positive changes go along way !
    Mi5h Mi5h
    18-21, F
    Jul 17, 2014

    Is it possible to be

    so happy, then suddenly fall out of love with your partner for no reason???
    sharz16 sharz16
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jul 21, 2014

    I'm in a relationship

    and want out but afraid the other guy will be better of than me cause he's younger, and more of a hustler type , should I stay and pay the way or let go and find someone else , I have a lot to offer someone , but scared to be alone feel like I lost the person I was and became...
    builtstud builtstud
    51-55, M
    2 Responses May 1, 2014

    I have been a lot good from

    before in terms of depression, but when it cones to the point of having no one to talk and share and laugh and enjoy. I get really weak. I am losing myself right now. I can't even talk to anyone.
    thedivich1 thedivich1
    22-25, M
    Mar 16, 2016

    Smoking. Drinking. I've been asked by some

    friends if I wanted to do Acid and Shrooms with them... Sad part is I said that I might... This is not at all who I wanted to be... But here we go... You only live once. It's too short to not experiment. Let's hope it takes my life early.
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    3 Responses May 13, 2015

    Can Anyone Help Me?

    Generally, I'm a happy person. There's not a day I can't smile. But lately I've been feeling so fake--like the smile on my face is there from pure habit. I don't like making people worry about me. My friends look up to me and depend on me for a lot of things. I...
    elizabethhhhh elizabethhhhh
    4 Responses Sep 30, 2008
    grommit3 grommit3
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Apr 20, 2015

    College Is Making Me Lose Myself

    I thought going to college would be a great experience for me, a fresh start. I'd get to know people from all over the world, learn about different perspectives on things, live alongside others who were going through the same thing as me, and make close lifelong friends. My first...
    ghayebgirl ghayebgirl
    2 Responses Jan 3, 2012

    I am not okay. I don't know

    where to go or how to see all of my flaws. I see them and then lose sight and in return continue to repeatedly make the same mistakes over and over. I need to find the control.
    deleted deleted
    Feb 14, 2015

    I've been getting high

    for 3 straight days. Just so I can forget about everything for a while... Sit there, still in agony, yet I can't feel it. But at the same time I feel everything. The memories. The heartbreak. The pain. All of it. I feel it... But for once I don't need to cry about it. I don't...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Feb 8, 2015

    Forgetting Who I Really Am

    I was always knew exactly who i was.I always thought of my self of being very strong and independent. About 6 months ago i would of sworn i found the love of my life. As me and him grew closer i started changing things about myself because he didnt like certain things about me...
    wonderwall12 wonderwall12
    18-21, F
    107 Responses Aug 27, 2013

    What's lost can be found.

    You just have to force yourself sometimes to keep looking. Even though it seems everything is crumble before you doesn't mean it's the end. I was in the same position. Once you hit rock bottom, the way is to climb up. GOD heals the broken and honestly he healed me. I was super...
    sashakimi4 sashakimi4
    18-21, F
    Jun 11, 2014

    I'm slowly fading away into the dark thoughts

    of my mind. I have not been myself recently.
    ACyanideSurprise ACyanideSurprise
    22-25, M
    Sep 24, 2014

    There's ghosts in my bedroom,

    watching me as I fall asleep. They're standing over me as I dream, I can't move, can barely scream...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile
    22-25, M
    Mar 17, 2015

    I've never known who I really am

    and lately I've been questioning myself about that, the deal is that I am the only one who can answers to those questions but I don't know how... I'm feeling not good enough but people around me say that I am "amazing" but I don't know why I can't trust in what they are saying.
    Fernweh0215 Fernweh0215
    22-25, F
    Apr 30, 2014

    ...people came into your life

    for a reason , a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do....
    gracey23 gracey23
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jun 13, 2014

    Oh man, I just can't anymore.

    I have a nice home, friends/family, good grades, I have enough money, I have everything I just hate everything at the same time. I have everything planned out for the future and I never consider suicide. I want to live. I'm just really depressed in a sort of way. Some days I'm...
    AnonymousJSS AnonymousJSS
    16-17, F
    1 Response Aug 27, 2015
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