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I Am Lost and Cannot Find My Center

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 143 People

    MPD With No Host

    I feel I do not have a real me or center person.  I have DID of MPD, but I have come to the conclusion we are all alters and maybe the host is dormant or simply quite exsiting when I was very young.  We all share the same memories but have always made group descions on...
    allofus allofus 46-50, M Apr 28, 2009

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    Help! I Cant Find Myself

    The title says it all. Im lost and i try to find myself ive done yoga meditation and just tried to think of things i like and when i think i find myself i lose it and sometimes it was never me. Maybe me is jus messed up but i was me when i was young i lost her when i was about 5...
    desertedangel desertedangel 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    Out of Balance

    There is just something wrong.  I have no focus and it has taken me a lot of reflection to see that.  My moods are so far to the left or to the right.  Well, if the “left” is sadness and the “right” is hostility, then I must retract that...
    wikkedirish wikkedirish 31-35, M 4 Responses Aug 14, 2008

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    Perfectly put. That's me.

    Ever since I was 2 I had a very strong will. People called it stubbornness. Well I when I was 28 I had a rude awakening and realized I was never who o had always thought I was. When I lost that lifelong self I had nothing left to hold on to. I became empty and lost.
    QuestionMarks QuestionMarks 41-45, F 1 Response Sep 18, 2015

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    I wish I had all the answers to understand

    why I feel so depressed and lost. I tried denying to myself that I'm not depressed which only left me feeling worse, instead off accepting my feelings and dealing with them has had far worse repurcasions. People don't want to hear if you tell them you are depressed, this has...
    Jay04Sch Jay04Sch 41-45, F 1 Response Mar 8, 2014

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    Struggle Within

    The beast within me is asleep once again.  How long will it stay that way?  How much longer can I keep him at bay?    I try not to feed this beast with my hate. I will not sate its thirst with alcohol.  The beast fears no man, and at times like this, I...
    wikkedirish wikkedirish 31-35, M 5 Responses Aug 17, 2008

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    Since long I am travelling tired

    and weary through the paths of darkness I urge you show me the light. In my eyes are only visions of dreadful dark nights I plea to you blossom in them golden lights as vibrant flowers smiles bathing in morning dew. With your graceful uplifting words help me erase my fearful...
    winterfall winterfall 41-45 Mar 8, 2014

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    I Want To Be Alone

    I have a feeling that I hate most people, because I think they are cruel and mean and they want to hurt me. I am so nervous around people, but I hide behind a mask of a strong and condident person. But, inside me, there is a broken and scared child, who is looking for care, love...
    BigChild BigChild 46-50, F 1 Response Oct 17, 2011

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    Stumbling In The Dark

    I have never had a perfect marriage, but thought we would be together till the end. I foolishly engulfed myself in my husband, our sons and our business. Two years ago I noticed a huge change in my husband. Now he tells me he wants out. I am realing from this, as I have stood...
    katlady66 katlady66 46-50, F 2 Responses Nov 2, 2010

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    Related Experiences

    I wear strength and darkness equally well. I'm in a dark place but it's where I find the most strength. Light is coming and I will be ready for it.
    LavenderDarling LavenderDarling 26-30, F 3 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    why I cannot find that one who devote his life for me:(, I will do the same and never let him go
    Meowlady Meowlady 22-25, F 7 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    I sometimes think people are in love with the fantasy of being the 'one' person who could inspire/affect someone who appears untouchable to the world at large. I suppose for some...
    taliaroger taliaroger 18-21, F 8 hrs ago

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    I lost my best friend last night. Once upon a time we were lovers, then we became just friends. After 2 years, it all comes to an end. My friend had become very close to...
    DesolateSoul64 DesolateSoul64 51-55 8 hrs ago

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    Thursday I lost a friend a man I really respected and had taught me alot. He was the was a very interesting man. I had bought part of his bussiness and had started to rebuild it...
    livelife920 livelife920 36-40, M 8 hrs ago

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    It would be nice to find a really cool person that I have a good connection with and become good friends...
    LynnGurl12 LynnGurl12 22-25, F 9 hrs ago

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    it's impossible to find true love while you are ugly. ......all girls want someone who looks like David Beckham. ........ not a stupid ugly fat guy like me
    HISHAM9in8wonderland HISHAM9in8wonderland 16-17, M 5 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    I want to find love. A person who likes me for me and a person who I can talk to about anything
    Anthony2400 Anthony2400 22-25, M 17 hrs ago

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    What's the last album you got lost in or you really enjoyed? Mine is Todd Rundgren's "Something/Anything?". Oldie but goodie.
    stjimmy765 stjimmy765 18-21, M 3 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I have no idea what to do with myself. I'm basically in a perpetual existential crisis. I just exist most of the time. I need to find my passion and someone to share this life with...
    OrganicMachina OrganicMachina 31-35, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Islam asks women to cover themselves in front of any males whom she can marry (or in other words, whom she can have a sexual relationship with) so it excludes most relatives from...
    MissGaga MissGaga 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Just rambling, getting this off my chest, I have no idea what I'm doing, so I'll just type and see where this goes. I MAY have anxiety, I know for sure I'm probably hurting in the...
    Kchp Kchp 22-25, M 1 day ago

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    April 2nd 2015 At 10:20 pm I got a call from my sister Katie, she told me mom committed suicide. She shot her self in the head and at the time I thought it was a sick april fools...
    bethaneyj bethaneyj 18-21, F 12 Responses 1 day ago

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    I don't know how to move on in life. Everyday, when I wake up, I feel depressed. I cannot think fast enough. I am currently 21, and I am studying Engineering at a university. I...
    dirtyuer dirtyuer 18-21, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I lost my soul-mate husband 4 years back after he joined M.A.UM Meditation. This is a cult. He became an emotionally and Narcissistic abusive stranger. This has caused me...
    dvirmani dvirmani 41-45, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I miss the light of the moon kissing your body as your voice fills the silence of the roomI miss the warmth of your lipsThe wet from every kissThe soft smacks that fill the silence...
    nocool nocool 41-45, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    It's been over a year now since he, my uncle, died and I find myself thinking about him a lot. We didn't see much of one another while he was alive, but in my last few years of...
    ProcessOfBecoming ProcessOfBecoming 18-21, T 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    I wish I can find a pretty girl who isn't like this girl. That's all they seem to want. Where is all the pretty girls who has a weird sense of humor and don't look like a shallow...
    YourSecretAdmire22 YourSecretAdmire22 22-25, M 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    Sometimes resigning yourself to the fact that your life is difficult, maybe more than others and being okay with this fact and maybe trying to make a difference to someones life...
    SunlightSeeker SunlightSeeker 26-30, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    I feel so lost. I am 21 years old, working a dead-end job, and investing thousands into a major that I have no interest in. I cannot seem to get over my ex and I have forsaken...
    bawstenbrewin bawstenbrewin 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 5

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    Its has been almost 5 years since separation. I am falling apart. I cannot take the losses and living in fear waiting for the next one. I've lost my oldest and youngest daughter...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Feb 4

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    I feel like I lost who I am, but I can't figure out where. I need to find myself, I'm tired of being emotionless and watching everyone around me succeed and live their life. I feel...
    DaisyKaine DaisyKaine 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 3

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    Grief is a funny thing. It sneaks up on you, quietly, stealthily, then mugs you of your belongings in a dark alleyway. Sometimes you can feel it coming, sometimes you don't. It...
    PaigeLawley PaigeLawley 16-17, F 7 Responses Feb 3

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    It happened when I was 12 years old. I was attending this party, and made on I was older - at least 16 - in order to impress the boys there. It was stupid, but at the time, I...
    Lipsinco Lipsinco 18-21, F 8 Responses Feb 2

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    Hello everyone! I have never been to this site before, but I think this is a really cool idea. I don't know if this is relevant to any one else out there, but lately I have been...
    JThomas18 JThomas18 26-30, M 1 Response Feb 1

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    Oh, how my heart goes out to you. If only I could take away your pain. My heartfelt love and prayers go out to all who are experiencing a loss. Hopefully, I might bring you a...
    Grace2U Grace2U 66-70, F 1 Response Feb 1

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    The desert will bring him back to me... We met on a dating website. months and months of talking, long messages back and forth discussing such beautiful things, a glorious wait...
    sweetsexxylexy sweetsexxylexy 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 31

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    My stranger for a Mother plucks my hair in the nighttime or her boyfriend's family members pluck my hair in the morning while the door is unbolted and I'm having seizures. Today...
    ONESTARRYSTARRYNIGHT ONESTARRYSTARRYNIGHT 26-30, F Jan 31

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    So many things have changed... I'm thankful and grateful for the people in my life now. But, the friends I once had are gone. They are now a thought in my mind. I thought we'd...
    Whirlwind5 Whirlwind5 41-45, M 1 Response Jan 31

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    Whatever and however you are today is a result of the rest of your past. What I find sad is actually not remembering what happened In those times, what makes you You! Lately I've...
    KeithTheDude KeithTheDude 18-21, M Jan 31

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    I am a book written entirely in invisible ink. My past is seriously conflicting with the present & I'm so lost I can't even find myself!.
    ToneOfFont ToneOfFont 36-40, F 1 Response Jan 30

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