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I Am Married But Lonely

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 15,384 People

    My Wife Shows No Affection

    I am a 39 year old man in pretty good shape, 6'2" and fairly good looking.  I am a very affectionate and loving person, but my wife is not.  I am always the one to initiate sex, hugs, kisses, or any type of physical contact.  I don't understand why she's so...
    raptor660 raptor660 36-40, M 270 Responses Nov 18, 2009

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    Some days I feel desperate,

    desperate to have all that I'm missing with an actual human being.. or at least to develop a sincere friendship with someone that understands what I'm truly going through, not just some random guy that can't type to save his soul and demands a pic on message 3. Makes me...
    sweetdreamer3 sweetdreamer3 36-40, F 74 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    I don't know what to do.

    please, someone, anyone talk to me. I'm married to a woman who makes me feel lower than low. I'm a god man. I'm very observant of others needs and I aim to meet them. I am a great dad, my son is my best friend. I have 2 friends who tell me the same thing, " she doesn't...
    LoStOnArOcK LoStOnArOcK 31-35, M 17 Responses 1 day ago

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    I've been married for several years,

    and thought we had the fairy tale marriage. The marriage that beat the odds, where love conquers all, until last week, when my husband was finally honest and said that he wasn't happy. For years, on some level I felt like a failure, because it felt like I could never quite...
    Lanna40 Lanna40 36-40, F 4 Responses Feb 17

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    So excited...if anyone has read my story you

    know my husband and I are like strangers in our home. Wellllllllll yesterday he took me out on a date ...dinner and a movie still not much conversation but hey it was nice and I really felt like he was trying. Then this morning he offered to take me to the park where I typically...
    Hedoesnotloveme Hedoesnotloveme 36-40, F 19 Responses May 4, 2014

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    Last night I approached her gently (as always),

    hoping to make love to her... She rebuffed me, insisting that she was tired and so... I can understand that of course, it wasn't the first time after all... The thing that hurts though is, throughout the entire 12 years that we are together, I have never said no to her intimate...
    andy7rs andy7rs 31-35, M 32 Responses Dec 19, 2014

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    My hubby managed to ruin

    yet another holiday for me with his negativity and no tree or presents I bought the kids Christmas presents and all he does is complain and gripe about the money spent and that I'm a hoarder Kids need gifts I'm sorry his parents were too busy fighting each other to buy their...
    michellegh michellegh 36-40, F 34 Responses Dec 25, 2014

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    I have been married for 15 years

    and we have one child. My husband is an over the road truck driver, he is gone a lot. I work full time. I really miss having him home. I get really lonely without him at home.
    lostpedal lostpedal 31-35, F 4 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    So, my wife is a drunk.

    She is on a week long bender. She's been to rehab, we see how effectual that was. I've fought with her, hid her keys because she will drive drunk to get more, I park in the way so she cant leave, she runs into my truck, disabke her car, she walks to the store, called the cops on...
    Luchs Luchs 41-45, M 70 Responses Dec 7, 2014

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    Wisdom Of Oscar Wilde

    He sums up my marital situation perfectly. "A bore is someone who deprives you of solitude, without providing you with company."
    MissBehaviour MissBehaviour 36-40, F 9 Responses Oct 19, 2013

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    Once again I sit alone on Friday night.

    It really wouldn't matter if he were here, I would still be alone.
    lonelyone80 lonelyone80 31-35, F 28 Responses Jul 26, 2014

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    I've been married for 15 years.

    Five years ago my wife was hospitalized for bipolar manic depressive. She has since been hospitalized two more times and has subsequently been heavily medicated. She is now detached and the woman I married is just a shell. Resently, she started coming off some of the meds and...
    NewlyNude NewlyNude 36-40, M 11 Responses 1 day ago

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    Marriage vows seriously need to say "I will

    try" instead of "I promise to love you till death due us part" along with all the other promises that humans can't possibly keep!
    sweetdreamer3 sweetdreamer3 36-40, F 9 Responses Feb 15

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    Don't get me wrong I love my wife

    and my family, but when she's not around, when she goes out with friends I feel lonely. When I get lonely my mind worries bout what she's up to. How do I stop myself worrying.
    stonecold31625 stonecold31625 26-30, M 7 Responses Feb 13

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    Marriage = Loneliness = Divorce?

     He is a great man, kind, easy going, funny, intelligent but I do not respect him, I am not in love him nor do I want be intimate with him. We haven't been together intimately since Aug 19/2008. It was his birthday and well, I felt guilty. And prior to that, we had sex maybe...
    wickedties wickedties 41-45, F 76 Responses Jan 12, 2010

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    of course i'm lonely!

    I come second to video games!That's why i'm on ep:(
    1prettygirl 1prettygirl 36-40, F 48 Responses Nov 8, 2014

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    Had already posted: I want to wake up next to

    the woman i married. Look at her, smile, kiss, make love! I want to go to bed, look at the one i married. smile, Kiss, make love! I know life isn't all roses. But to water the seeds to help them grow...
    Leftyss Leftyss 46-50, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    I've been married 24 yrs this year.

    During this time, I totally devoted my life to being a loyal wife and a good mother. Now that my baby is 17, we finally have time for us. But we have nothing in common. Being total opposites has helped us in the past. We kind of leveled each other out. Now, it's working against...
    wantingattentionbad wantingattentionbad 46-50, F 24 Responses Jun 25, 2014

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    I love my husband, I (mostly) love our life

    together. But I'm not happy. Our child and his job take up a lot of time. I pursue my own interests and hobbies, but he never has energy anymore. We are polyamorous, but it's been 4 years since I've dated anyone else. I'm over nsa - I want something meaningful and longterm...
    CowgirlQT CowgirlQT 31-35, F 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    I swear there are times these days

    when I can't even remember why I married my husband. I can barely recapture that feeling of being in love and having him as the center of my universe. I know it was there for a long, long time... I vaguely remember wanting no one but him and him feeling the same about me, and...
    pinkpussycat4u pinkpussycat4u 51-55, F 21 Responses Aug 3, 2014

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    Why Oh Why...

    Here I am lying in bed writing this and another night by myself. where's my husband? He's asleep in a single bed with our 9 year old daughter. It started a few months ago and our daughter asked my husband (h) and her father to sleep in her bed with her. That was on a friday...
    UnhappySmiles UnhappySmiles 36-40, F 47 Responses Aug 4, 2013

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    I feel like we are more roommates

    than husband and wife :(
    143ily 143ily 22-25, F 50 Responses Feb 12, 2014

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    Ok here goes. I am new here

    and this is my first post. I would just like to know how long is too long to wait for intimacy? My wife and I have been cold now for over 4 months. Before then we only did it once a month if that. She says she loves me and we have been married for 15 years. I dont even try...
    stronzo stronzo 46-50, M 4 Responses Feb 20

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    spoiledlittle spoiledlittle 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 14

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    My Husband is a wonderful person .

    The best big brother to his Sisters.My fathers favorite Son in Law.The most caring father to his children and he gives me a wonderful home.Every night we say a formal goodnight part ways and walk towards our seperate rooms ...Am i being reckless in asking the universe for more?
    warriormama warriormama 41-45, F 62 Responses Jan 16

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    Who ever thought that

    when they got married they would eventually find themselves feeling like the loneliest person on earth? I have too much life left in me and too much love to give to continue down this path.
    lonelysmile77 lonelysmile77 36-40 15 Responses Jan 20

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    My dear husband informed me

    that on Christmas Eve the bar is having a Christmas party and he is going and I can tag along if I like!!! merry freaking Christmas to me!! Fu-king A-- hole
    deleted deleted 26-30 31 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    Got Glue?

    Sex is the lubricant that eases the wear and tear of daily life.  It's the glue that binds a couple emotionally.  
    1OHD 1OHD 51-55, M 22 Responses Apr 30, 2012

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    I love my husband, but sometimes I feel like

    the small dog who is circling around, jumping at the big dog saying "HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY! LOOK AT ME! HEY!" I'm exhausted. I just want his attention. :( Why am I not good enough?
    isoanything isoanything 36-40, F 59 Responses Nov 17, 2014

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    My husband only spends time with friends

    and no time with my baby and me. The time he is home, he is working on the computer and does not like to be bothered at all. As soon as a friend calls to do something, he drops everything and runs to go out with them. You should see the excitement and desperation. I do not mind...
    runninggal runninggal 31-35, F 52 Responses Jun 24, 2014

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    Since being on here. It is amazing how many

    people. Be it women or men. Who are in the same situation as me. Married but lonely. No affection. No attention. A bit uncomfortable with eachother. No bonding between a husband and wife! In the bedroom. Out of the bedroom. But their are still those. Who have been married for...
    Leftyss Leftyss 46-50, M 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Time Wasted

    I married way too young, at the age of 19. I was an insecure, scared child at the time, and all I knew was that I loved this fun-loving guy and I was comfortable and safe with him. So when he proposed, I said yes, even though I knew I wasn't ready. I didn't want to hurt him, and...
    infinitedreamer infinitedreamer 26-30, F 89 Responses Sep 10, 2008

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    funny how you can feel this way

    even though you are not alone
    lifetolive39 lifetolive39 36-40, M 16 Responses Jan 17

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    We got married last April.

    Yea, it's early in the marriage, but ever since that day things have gone straight downhill. We don't have sex, ever. Last time was December I think. She always has an excuse for affection beyond hugging or cuddling. Usually she won't kiss me beyond a simple peck unless she has...
    firemedic12 firemedic12 26-30, M 5 Responses 6 days ago

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    Its so shameful to say,

    but it is just the truth. Sometimes we go out on dates, like we will go have dinner and literally sit there and not say anything to each other. He is usually on his his phone looking at FB or IG. I tell him all the time that he needs to put the phone down because he is not...
    aurismith aurismith 26-30, F 14 Responses a week ago

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    I wake up every morning crying.

    I am having trouble accepting that my marriage is sexless. I don't believe in divorce or infidelity. So I know I have to find acceptance. It's just so hard. We never touch, cuddle, there's 2 feet between us every night in bed. I can not even talk about this with him unless I...
    lmd333 lmd333 31-35, F 25 Responses Jan 22

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    Happy Valentines Day to me.

    .. I might as well say it to myself because he won't. We haven't even got as much as a card for each other this year - I was going to get him a card last week... but he wouldn't let me go out, so I couldn't do it. All I can think about is getting out and being free to do as I...
    LoneSouls LoneSouls 26-30, F 2 Responses Feb 13

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    As a wife of an alcoholic I feel

    so disconnected from my husband. I no longer want to be intimate bc I don't feel love in that way anymore. Can I get that back?? I still care for him! I just feel so lonely.
    TomasAva TomasAva 26-30, F 32 Responses 4 days ago

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    You Ruin Me: By The Veronicas Job well

    done Standing ovation Yeah you got what you wanted I guess you won And I don't want to hear, they don't know you like I do Even I could've told you But now we're done 'Cause you play me like a symphony Play me till your fingers bleed I'm your greatest masterpiece You ruin me...
    classynsassy34 classynsassy34 31-35, F Feb 19

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    Men-- need your help.

    Besides the obvious... give me some ideas for 10 yr anniversary gift. Things are not wonderful or great, but I still would like to step out of the box a little & for what it's worth, just show him that I do appreciate the man he is to our family!
    sweetdreamer3 sweetdreamer3 36-40, F 23 Responses Feb 19

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    Well... I guess I don't have to worry about

    this anymore. Wife just packed her stuff and drove away after 13 years. :(
    slim156 slim156 41-45, M 14 Responses a week ago

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    I Asked For A Hug

    This morning, the need to be held was so overwhelming, I didn't think I could bear it. I kept looking at my husband, wondering if I should ask for a hug. There is no physical contact between us for years, and it does my self esteem no good, when I have to ask my own husband to...
    Carissimi Carissimi 56-60, F 106 Responses Oct 18, 2011

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    Ever try to just have a friend to flirt with?

    Someone who won't judge and you can actually tell anything to? Oh yeah that person was my husband until we got married:(
    gypsie420 gypsie420 31-35, F 25 Responses Feb 17

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    My husband left me 7 months ago

    and my son (15) went with him. He said he was done. He said he had to have peace and that he could no longer trust me. If you read my stories you'll see that I had two affairs. I haven't been with anyone else since he left. He and my son live alone and he has not dated...
    reddhot reddhot 51-55, F 3 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I consider myself a strong independent woman,

    but tonight is hard. Not for any reason out of the ordinary. Maybe it's because he is away tonight. Maybe it's because I just made myself a drink. Maybe it's because it the holidays. Maybe it's because I know my life is about to get very difficult once the divorce process starts...
    Luckymomof2boys Luckymomof2boys 31-35, F 18 Responses Dec 6, 2014

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    So our marriage therapist said we needed to set

    some time at least once a week to talk about our relationship and how things are going. I had tried that a few years ago and my H always seemed to forget that we had put time aside to talk. So I told the therapist I was tired of always being the one who made the effort to do...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 7 Responses Feb 16

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    Should There Be Something Special ?

    I don't ask for too much from what can be offered. My marriage is purely a facade of few simple beautiful things. But inside, there is always the hunger for true companioship between married couples. I long for a good conversation. Something that would add up to spice an endowing...
    ladyryan ladyryan 41-45, F 55 Responses Jul 20, 2012

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    I miss the sexual intimacy we had

    before kids. I don't regret having kids and I think most parents can relate to the challenges of work, household responsibilities, kids' homework our work, etc... We have talked about it, made plans and agreed on comprimises. But still over time those agreements faded and...
    westhills248 westhills248 41-45, M 4 Responses Feb 19

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    Can someone please tell me what it's like to

    have a spouse who makes you feel loved and wanted on Valentine's Day? I need to at least live vicariously through someone else's romantic day.
    Mike405 Mike405 46-50, M 5 Responses Feb 14

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    I just wish I had emotional support.

    he ignores me so much....and all I need is to know I'm wanted and loved. I've done everything I can to make him notice me....I'm at a loss
    TheGypsyGirl2015 TheGypsyGirl2015 22-25, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    Looks like another valentines day alone.

    We have been together 7 years and never have been able to have a Valentine's day together because of his job. Same with birthdays, thanksgiving, Christmas, new years etc. All of the days that a family should be together he has to work.
    kayroxyoursox kayroxyoursox 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 13

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