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I Am Married, Lonely And Crave Intimacy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,882 People

    Maybe I'm just having a pity party

    but slowly I'm learning that feelings are real and cannot just be swept under a rug. Maybe I just need to vent and afterwards I'll feel better so here goes. I'm usually a positive person and can always find the bright side of any situation but the past few days I guess this...
    SirLaughalots SirLaughalots 36-40, M 8 Responses Nov 10, 2014

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    Sleeping in bed by myself gets very very lonely.

    I just miss having some one next to me and holding each other. Some one to kiss good night, some one to cuddle with on cold mornings, some one who actually wants me laying beside them and likes these same things. I really miss simple things, like waking up first with his back...
    Luckymomof2boys Luckymomof2boys 31-35, F 28 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    My wife and I are caring friends,

    great roommates, and doting coparents, but have been at an impasse for years. She is a self-admitted "asexual" and I'm anything but. We don't want to rupture our family, so with her reluctant consent I came here looking for understanding from others in my predicament and, to be...
    MrFineGrind MrFineGrind 56-60, M 1 Response Mar 12

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    Taboomarried Taboomarried 31-35, M 2 Responses Mar 17

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    As individuals we are self aware beings.

    Marriage is supposed to bond us together yet so many never gain the awareness that it takes to secure that bond. We learn through companionship the "signs" of our partners. We are to read them as if they are a book. Dating is like a learning process and by marriage we should...
    incognito21 incognito21 26-30, M 8 Responses Mar 25

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    33 yr old and never thought it would come to

    this I just need that butterflies feeling again
    kikthegoodguy11 kikthegoodguy11 31-35, M 6 Responses Nov 30, 2014

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    I just need some attention.

    seems like everyone else is a priority in my husbands life above me. hes constantly socializing with others, new friends and meeting people. I don't do any of that. I feel like we should protect our marriage by not just recklessly inviting strangers into our lives as friends...
    mochalocalatte mochalocalatte 26-30, F 4 Responses Mar 4

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    Another frustrating night

    but I'm not gonna whine about it ... Time for a different approach
    gagal2014 gagal2014 41-45, F 7 Responses Jul 24, 2014

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    I am laying in my bed in my big rig

    and I would just love to have a woman here with me to snuggle and talk with and yes, make love to. I hate what I do to make a living. My wife has carved out her independent life using both our incomes to make herself comfortable. She loves me but loves her life more. The best of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Mar 11

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    Been with my wife 15 years(combined dating

    and married). We have 3 awesome kids all under 6. It has been roughly 4 months since we have been intimate. I feel very lost. Maybe we've grown apart. It seems anytime we drink it happens and one of us leaves the room pissed and unsatisfied(majority of the time it's me). I'm the...
    JackRabbit77 JackRabbit77 36-40, M 5 Responses Mar 23

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    Ugh! I hate Valentine's Day.

    Every year he justifies not doing anything for me by saying this holiday is bogus and made up by big companies to get consumers to spend money. Every year I do something special for him, or get him a gift, knowing I will get nothing in return. It's not all about spending money...
    Geekmom007 Geekmom007 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 14

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    Ugh! I dread tomorrow.

    Valentine's day. I will pretend to love my husband for my children. I have such a difficult time now pretending like I am happy and I care. I can do it in front of our kids but why do I have to do it for him? I've been in this marriage without any emotional intimacy and support...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 13 Responses Feb 13

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    I have been off EP for a few months.

    This story bears sharing. Wife and I haven't had sex in over a year. Once the year before that. We cooled to the point of meeting with attorneys and came within an inch of divorce. I ended up staying in it for my kids. I don't want to share time with them. We are very...
    CravingSomething CravingSomething 36-40, M 8 Responses Mar 20

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    I've been married 8 years

    and feel like I am wasting time every day that goes by. I guess I made the wrong decision in marrying my wife but two kids later I feel like I'm stuck in this relationship. My children depend on me for everything. I work almost everyday, even worked two jobs to put her...
    Stimulatingconvoplz Stimulatingconvoplz 31-35, M 1 Response Mar 7

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    I've tried so hard to make my relationship work

    over 6 years.. My husband makes my cry every other day. Don't think he means to we have just become horrible to each other. I can't even sleep next to him anymore. Lately I've been feeling so lonely, is that crazy? I've been having day dreams about other guys and the kind of...
    js82 js82 31-35, F 17 Responses Apr 27, 2014

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    why should I have to tell you what I like

    after ten years together? why do u not listen when I talk, but I know every aspect of your life? I know your thought process. I feel your feelings. I know your mood by your facial expression and body language instantly. I feel your emotions. I help you explore them. I'm...
    Stimulatingconvoplz Stimulatingconvoplz 31-35, M 3 Responses Mar 17

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    My husbands been gone

    for four months now. My son keeps me occupied but I'm emotionally deprived. I hate being alone. I know no one in this military hell hole. My husband won't talk to me cause he has other things to do like drink and party. While I'm home with our son 24/7. I miss that touch, a man...
    vanessamoomoo vanessamoomoo 22-25, F 10 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    I used to think that we would always be this

    close while I laid in his arms. Boy was I naive. I miss that more than anything.
    KCecil73 KCecil73 41-45, F 3 Responses Jan 22

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    hotpaguy hotpaguy 36-40, M Feb 19

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    It comes in waves. Sometimes I am ok.

    Sometimes I am so starved for contact that it's all I can think of. Those are the most dangerous times, because I know all it would is a spark with someone and who knows what would happen. Well, that's not being honest. We all know what would happen. It's what happens after...
    CravingSomething CravingSomething 36-40, M 5 Responses Mar 28

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    My husband doesn't talk to me.

    We don't go on dates. We don't have sex. He snores so loudly that we hardly even sleep together. And he literally sleeps so far away from me that I can't even touch him. We have 3 kids, ages 9, 13, and 16. I seriously fantasize about dating someone else and having romance again...
    Tejaschick Tejaschick 46-50, F 9 Responses Jun 18, 2014

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    To ME, A woman is NEVER sexier

    than when she is standing in the room, in her underwear, or part of it, with her wet hair, getting dressed for the day..... There is just something about the beauty of a woman who is NOT trying to look sensuous, and might just be feeling the exact opposite... but as i have...
    Drummer1013 Drummer1013 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 15, 2014

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    I am married but yet feel

    so alone, our sex life is very minimal and I have cravings that are so intense yet ignored.. I am a very sexual female and I live think and breathe it! I'm not really sure if my husband is just going through changes in his sexual appetite. Whatever the case maybe it is very...
    TandT0420 TandT0420 36-40, F 31 Responses Mar 21, 2014

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    Where did the man I married go?

    We fight almost constantly. He says he has no need for affection or attention from me and I'm being needy because my needs for those thing are still there. He had become so cold and distant.
    MLH205 MLH205 41-45, F 10 Responses Oct 13, 2014

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    Dinner Date

    We don't go out much any more, mostly due to finances, but sometimes its nice... Last night was totally worth it, too! It was the usual, crowded room, her going on about herself, loud music... But then I saw you across the room. I noticed you first, your face glowing in the...
    2feetApart 2feetApart 36-40, M 2 Responses Jun 28, 2013

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    Together Yet Alone

    Sitting in the silence, the years brought absence.Loves grown distant and cold. Two ships that pass in the night, one no longer aware of the other. As something misplaced, but no longer sought, who would had known, who would had thought. This love dies a lonely death, where lies...
    Waymor Waymor 51-55, M 7 Responses Sep 24, 2012

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    I have been married quite a long time.

    And, like other long-term relationships, the "fizz" has dissipated. I take responsibility for virtually all of what has happened to bring my marriage, my relationship, my friendship, with my wife to the point that it now is. I made mistakes, I trusted the wrong people, I didn...
    rcrumb69 rcrumb69 61-65, M 5 Responses Mar 27

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    Wife and i actually had sex last night.

    You would think yay! But was not all that... i tried to make it intimate.... she was more focused on getting me off so she cud be done. And not havevto worry about it again. Needless to say reassuring me. We will never have the intimacy And affection that i want to give and...
    Leftyss Leftyss 46-50, M 5 Responses Mar 17

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    Want to hear something pathetic?

    I'm sitting in the chair getting my hair cut and I realized how much I missed a woman touching me. Not sexual, but sensual. The way she brushed my hair with her fingertips, her arms brushing my face. Leaning over me smelling so nice.  Catching her look at me in the mirror with...
    Blueeyedboy70i Blueeyedboy70i 41-45, M 8 Responses Oct 11, 2014

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    Blueeyedboy70i Blueeyedboy70i 41-45, M 6 Responses Apr 14

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    My hurts feelings lead to resentment.

    My resentment leads to a sense of entitlement. By the time I get there, I'm ready to do anything to find affection and physical intimacy, and I believe I'm "justified" in doing so. I may be, but Im not sure.
    rg3001 rg3001 56-60 3 Responses Feb 27

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    I was in the same situation.

    Married for too many years without sex and intimacy. One day I just decided that life was too short and I deserved to be happy. It was difficult and heartwretching---but the best decision I ever made. If you're unhappy and your partner is not willing to work with you to find...
    Sinfulkisses869 Sinfulkisses869 41-45, F 10 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    Past 3 weeks in a row.

    Wife and i had alone time for about an hour. On tuesday.First time i grabbed her hand. Started walking towards the bedroom. She pulled away. Said NaH! The 2nd time i went up to her hugged her. Said we have an hour, let's go! Lol she said you have to give me warning.... come on...
    Leftyss Leftyss 46-50, M 7 Responses Mar 4

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    Recently, we agreed to divorce

    after the holidays. In my mind, we have been separated for months. Separate lives. Separate bedrooms. Separate priorities. I am thinking about my life ahead as a single mom. How in the world does one start to date after a divorce? I feel that I "settled" for my husband. I even...
    Luckymomof2boys Luckymomof2boys 31-35, F 15 Responses Dec 4, 2014

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    I'm a good person in most aspects of my life,

    but I've not been a good wife, but my husband thankfully does not know this. I don't want to stop the affair I'm having but want to understand why I need to do it??? My husband works offshore, home a month then away a month, he's extremely tired when he comes home and all I want...
    goodgirldoingbad goodgirldoingbad 36-40, F 37 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    Happy Anniversary. Not!

    Twenty two years married, twenty six together. We had a nice dinner, flirted, talked, laughed. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife it was so thick. Then she said, in a very seductive voice, " take me home and ravish me". Those were her words, not mine. I couldn't...
    RoughRed RoughRed 46-50, M 20 Responses Mar 24

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    Woke up this morning to a quiche.

    .. Wish it was a quickie!! 😂😂
    slim156 slim156 41-45, M 2 Responses Feb 15

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    I've been married for 11 years

    and have a son and daughter I love very much. For the majority of the past 11 years I have lived with a serious lack of intimacy. I crave passion, desire and all the excitement that comes with it, I miss it terribly. I don't know what to do. I love my kids and I don't want to...
    Wyoming04 Wyoming04 41-45, M 4 Responses Jan 30

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    So we celebrated Valentine's Day tonight

    instead of tomorrow. I guess you can't get dinner reservations when you wait until the Thursday before to call 😣. It was nice. We had a good conversation. Guess what DIDN'T happen when we got home? Not even three minutes into a movie we were going to watch and he's asleep in...
    MLH205 MLH205 41-45, F 10 Responses Feb 13

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    openmarried openmarried 36-40, M Feb 10

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    I am married for the second time

    and feel so lonely. I lay in bed just wanting to be held and not be the strong one anymore, but to be loved and cherished. this has gone on years and sometimes feel like ******* anyone. haven't, and won't. with the social media connection with people, I made a mistake. my first...
    tiffsica tiffsica 41-45, F 6 Responses Apr 12

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    I wish there was somewhere i could go

    when i just need to be held and feel as if i was 100%of the focus of the person embracing me. They are there just for me. To comfort me or encourage me or make me feel like i matter. Just positive, safe, protective warm arms holding me. I realized last year that haven't felt an...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 10 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    This beautiful poem is what i think of

    when i think about intimacy... The Invitation Oriah Mountain Dreamer It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 7 Responses Feb 7

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    CravingSomething CravingSomething 36-40, M 1 Response Mar 31

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    I think in 2015 I'm simply going to embrace the

    fact that I will forever feel this way. I will abandon hope because it's only a false feeling. I'm tired of feeling like this. It was only fulfilled when I had an affair, which regretfully I wish hadn't happened because I know what it's like to be wanted and it haunts me...
    idleheart idleheart 31-35, M 8 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    I have seen so many people on here

    that are, as the topic suggests, they're married and having little to no physical contact with their spouse. I found EP when I started searching for answers because I too am in this situation. It amazes me that so many of us are so lonely but we all stay married, why? We get...
    handymann4u handymann4u 51-55, M 6 Responses Apr 9

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