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I Am Married, Lonely And Crave Intimacy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,884 People

    I've been married 8 years

    and feel like I am wasting time every day that goes by. I guess I made the wrong decision in marrying my wife but two kids later I feel like I'm stuck in this relationship. My children depend on me for everything. I work almost everyday, even worked two jobs to put her...
    Stimulatingconvoplz Stimulatingconvoplz 31-35, M 1 Response Mar 7

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    My wife and I are caring friends,

    great roommates, and doting coparents, but have been at an impasse for years. She is a self-admitted "asexual" and I'm anything but. We don't want to rupture our family, so with her reluctant consent I came here looking for understanding from others in my predicament and, to be...
    MrFineGrind MrFineGrind 56-60, M 1 Response Mar 12

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    I wish there was somewhere i could go

    when i just need to be held and feel as if i was 100%of the focus of the person embracing me. They are there just for me. To comfort me or encourage me or make me feel like i matter. Just positive, safe, protective warm arms holding me. I realized last year that haven't felt an...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 10 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    I just need some attention.

    seems like everyone else is a priority in my husbands life above me. hes constantly socializing with others, new friends and meeting people. I don't do any of that. I feel like we should protect our marriage by not just recklessly inviting strangers into our lives as friends...
    mochalocalatte mochalocalatte 26-30, F 4 Responses Mar 4

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    I have seen so many people on here

    that are, as the topic suggests, they're married and having little to no physical contact with their spouse. I found EP when I started searching for answers because I too am in this situation. It amazes me that so many of us are so lonely but we all stay married, why? We get...
    handymann4u handymann4u 51-55, M 6 Responses Apr 9

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    As individuals we are self aware beings.

    Marriage is supposed to bond us together yet so many never gain the awareness that it takes to secure that bond. We learn through companionship the "signs" of our partners. We are to read them as if they are a book. Dating is like a learning process and by marriage we should...
    incognito21 incognito21 26-30, M 8 Responses Mar 25

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    My husbands been gone

    for four months now. My son keeps me occupied but I'm emotionally deprived. I hate being alone. I know no one in this military hell hole. My husband won't talk to me cause he has other things to do like drink and party. While I'm home with our son 24/7. I miss that touch, a man...
    vanessamoomoo vanessamoomoo 22-25, F 10 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    Wife and i actually had sex last night.

    You would think yay! But was not all that... i tried to make it intimate.... she was more focused on getting me off so she cud be done. And not havevto worry about it again. Needless to say reassuring me. We will never have the intimacy And affection that i want to give and...
    Leftyss Leftyss 46-50, M 5 Responses Mar 17

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    This beautiful poem is what i think of

    when i think about intimacy... The Invitation Oriah Mountain Dreamer It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 7 Responses Feb 7

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    Taboomarried Taboomarried 31-35, M 2 Responses Mar 17

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    So we celebrated Valentine's Day tonight

    instead of tomorrow. I guess you can't get dinner reservations when you wait until the Thursday before to call 😣. It was nice. We had a good conversation. Guess what DIDN'T happen when we got home? Not even three minutes into a movie we were going to watch and he's asleep in...
    MLH205 MLH205 41-45, F 10 Responses Feb 13

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    Happy Anniversary. Not!

    Twenty two years married, twenty six together. We had a nice dinner, flirted, talked, laughed. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife it was so thick. Then she said, in a very seductive voice, " take me home and ravish me". Those were her words, not mine. I couldn't...
    RoughRed RoughRed 46-50, M 20 Responses Mar 24

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    one day at a time. ?

    just take it one day at a time. ?
    mrsskayl mrsskayl 26-30, F 30 Responses Feb 18

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    It comes in waves. Sometimes I am ok.

    Sometimes I am so starved for contact that it's all I can think of. Those are the most dangerous times, because I know all it would is a spark with someone and who knows what would happen. Well, that's not being honest. We all know what would happen. It's what happens after...
    CravingSomething CravingSomething 36-40, M 5 Responses Mar 28

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    openmarried openmarried 36-40, M Feb 10

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    33 yr old and never thought it would come to

    this I just need that butterflies feeling again
    kikthegoodguy11 kikthegoodguy11 31-35, M 6 Responses Nov 30, 2014

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    I've tried so hard to make my relationship work

    over 6 years.. My husband makes my cry every other day. Don't think he means to we have just become horrible to each other. I can't even sleep next to him anymore. Lately I've been feeling so lonely, is that crazy? I've been having day dreams about other guys and the kind of...
    js82 js82 31-35, F 17 Responses Apr 27, 2014

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    I've been married for 11 years

    and have a son and daughter I love very much. For the majority of the past 11 years I have lived with a serious lack of intimacy. I crave passion, desire and all the excitement that comes with it, I miss it terribly. I don't know what to do. I love my kids and I don't want to...
    Wyoming04 Wyoming04 41-45, M 4 Responses Jan 30

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    I think in 2015 I'm simply going to embrace the

    fact that I will forever feel this way. I will abandon hope because it's only a false feeling. I'm tired of feeling like this. It was only fulfilled when I had an affair, which regretfully I wish hadn't happened because I know what it's like to be wanted and it haunts me...
    idleheart idleheart 31-35, M 8 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Want to hear something pathetic?

    I'm sitting in the chair getting my hair cut and I realized how much I missed a woman touching me. Not sexual, but sensual. The way she brushed my hair with her fingertips, her arms brushing my face. Leaning over me smelling so nice.  Catching her look at me in the mirror with...
    Blueeyedboy70i Blueeyedboy70i 41-45, M 8 Responses Oct 11, 2014

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    I'm a good person in most aspects of my life,

    but I've not been a good wife, but my husband thankfully does not know this. I don't want to stop the affair I'm having but want to understand why I need to do it??? My husband works offshore, home a month then away a month, he's extremely tired when he comes home and all I want...
    goodgirldoingbad goodgirldoingbad 36-40, F 37 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    Another frustrating night

    but I'm not gonna whine about it ... Time for a different approach
    gagal2014 gagal2014 41-45, F 7 Responses Jul 24, 2014

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    I was in the same situation.

    Married for too many years without sex and intimacy. One day I just decided that life was too short and I deserved to be happy. It was difficult and heartwretching---but the best decision I ever made. If you're unhappy and your partner is not willing to work with you to find...
    Sinfulkisses869 Sinfulkisses869 41-45, F 10 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    Woke up this morning to a quiche.

    .. Wish it was a quickie!! 😂😂
    slim156 slim156 41-45, M 2 Responses Feb 15

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    Blueeyedboy70i Blueeyedboy70i 41-45, M 6 Responses Apr 14

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    Ugh! I hate Valentine's Day.

    Every year he justifies not doing anything for me by saying this holiday is bogus and made up by big companies to get consumers to spend money. Every year I do something special for him, or get him a gift, knowing I will get nothing in return. It's not all about spending money...
    Geekmom007 Geekmom007 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 14

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    CravingSomething CravingSomething 36-40, M 1 Response Mar 31

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    Maybe I'm just having a pity party

    but slowly I'm learning that feelings are real and cannot just be swept under a rug. Maybe I just need to vent and afterwards I'll feel better so here goes. I'm usually a positive person and can always find the bright side of any situation but the past few days I guess this...
    SirLaughalots SirLaughalots 36-40, M 8 Responses Nov 10, 2014

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    Being lonely and wanting intimacy have got to

    be some of the worst feelings ever. It's not even about sex, I can get sex, I can initiate it, and I'll even enjoy it to a point, but I don't feel connected. There are so many things that I just don't share anymore. It's like I'm not important...me, the part on the inside. I...
    Xroads1017 Xroads1017 36-40, F 8 Responses Jun 1, 2014

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    Ugh! I dread tomorrow.

    Valentine's day. I will pretend to love my husband for my children. I have such a difficult time now pretending like I am happy and I care. I can do it in front of our kids but why do I have to do it for him? I've been in this marriage without any emotional intimacy and support...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 13 Responses Feb 13

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    why should I have to tell you what I like

    after ten years together? why do u not listen when I talk, but I know every aspect of your life? I know your thought process. I feel your feelings. I know your mood by your facial expression and body language instantly. I feel your emotions. I help you explore them. I'm...
    Stimulatingconvoplz Stimulatingconvoplz 31-35, M 3 Responses Mar 17

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    Been with my wife 15 years(combined dating

    and married). We have 3 awesome kids all under 6. It has been roughly 4 months since we have been intimate. I feel very lost. Maybe we've grown apart. It seems anytime we drink it happens and one of us leaves the room pissed and unsatisfied(majority of the time it's me). I'm the...
    JackRabbit77 JackRabbit77 36-40, M 5 Responses Mar 23

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    My hurts feelings lead to resentment.

    My resentment leads to a sense of entitlement. By the time I get there, I'm ready to do anything to find affection and physical intimacy, and I believe I'm "justified" in doing so. I may be, but Im not sure.
    rg3001 rg3001 56-60 3 Responses Feb 27

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    I have left food behind.

    .... Now I'm just hungry for what food was taking the place of. I want to have a man that wants to be with me. Wants to dance in the kitchen.... Kiss my neck while I'm doing the dishes. He will tell me a song made him think of me. He will pour a glass of wine and want to sit with...
    deleted deleted 26-30 48 Responses May 24, 2014

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    Where did the man I married go?

    We fight almost constantly. He says he has no need for affection or attention from me and I'm being needy because my needs for those thing are still there. He had become so cold and distant.
    MLH205 MLH205 41-45, F 10 Responses Oct 13, 2014

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    I am married for the second time

    and feel so lonely. I lay in bed just wanting to be held and not be the strong one anymore, but to be loved and cherished. this has gone on years and sometimes feel like ******* anyone. haven't, and won't. with the social media connection with people, I made a mistake. my first...
    tiffsica tiffsica 41-45, F 6 Responses Apr 12

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    To ME, A woman is NEVER sexier

    than when she is standing in the room, in her underwear, or part of it, with her wet hair, getting dressed for the day..... There is just something about the beauty of a woman who is NOT trying to look sensuous, and might just be feeling the exact opposite... but as i have...
    Drummer1013 Drummer1013 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 15, 2014

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    This is my 2nd marriage

    and she is a wonderful woman. She would do anything for anybody and you don't have to even ask her! Pretty good so far! When we got married, I had health issues and still do! My health is at the root of my being lonely! When we first started out we played around often, not a lot...
    cougar1967 cougar1967 66-70, M 1 Response Mar 25

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    I am married but yet feel

    so alone, our sex life is very minimal and I have cravings that are so intense yet ignored.. I am a very sexual female and I live think and breathe it! I'm not really sure if my husband is just going through changes in his sexual appetite. Whatever the case maybe it is very...
    TandT0420 TandT0420 36-40, F 31 Responses Mar 21, 2014

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    So last night after he gets off late

    for his shift. He texts me to tell me to be ready I wait and wait. He finally shows Im livid. Im tired and cranky. I get in the car and we head to the store. We needed a few things. As Im about to get out he hands me a card and a nice box of chocolates. He was late because he...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 8 Responses Feb 14

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    I am laying in my bed in my big rig

    and I would just love to have a woman here with me to snuggle and talk with and yes, make love to. I hate what I do to make a living. My wife has carved out her independent life using both our incomes to make herself comfortable. She loves me but loves her life more. The best of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Mar 11

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    I have been off EP for a few months.

    This story bears sharing. Wife and I haven't had sex in over a year. Once the year before that. We cooled to the point of meeting with attorneys and came within an inch of divorce. I ended up staying in it for my kids. I don't want to share time with them. We are very...
    CravingSomething CravingSomething 36-40, M 8 Responses Mar 20

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    I'm amazed that I can be surrounded by people

    all day and still be so lonely. I've been married less than 5 years and crave a true connection. We have sex less than once a year, and it's killing me! I'm a Scorpio. I need sex and intimacy. Our courtship was based on lies and fraud, but I can't get divorced. It goes against...
    Shelby2511 Shelby2511 41-45, F 16 Responses Sep 26, 2014

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    at the beginning of this month I wrote about my

    husband not putting me as a priority. he would go out all night drinking with his guy friends, coming home the next day sometimes not until afternoon. it was devastating to me, I felt disrespected and abandoned. finally, after much compromise, we came to an agreement and last...
    mochalocalatte mochalocalatte 26-30, F 2 Responses Mar 22

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    Tears. I just want to feel loved.

    Again. Anyone. Looking for that too. :( I need to be held.
    sassygirl42 sassygirl42 41-45, F 11 Responses Mar 7

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    My husband doesn't talk to me.

    We don't go on dates. We don't have sex. He snores so loudly that we hardly even sleep together. And he literally sleeps so far away from me that I can't even touch him. We have 3 kids, ages 9, 13, and 16. I seriously fantasize about dating someone else and having romance again...
    Tejaschick Tejaschick 46-50, F 9 Responses Jun 18, 2014

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