I Am Married to a Woman With Borderline Personality Disorder

For men who struggle with and cherish their women with BPD 237 People

    About To Give Up

    I have finally plucked up the courage to open up about what has been happening in my marriage so here goes… From the beginning my wife seemed addicted to drama. Anyone who criticizes is “going off at her”. Any horn that beeps in the street or overheard comment of a...
    breakingeggshells breakingeggshells
    26-30, M
    12 Responses Oct 3, 2012

    It's critical to understand

    that both narcissistic and borderline personality disordered individuals incurred similar types of wounds to their developing sense of Self, and isn't it simply natural to be drawn to someone with whom you have things in common, or who echoes personality aspects in yourself...
    nikeboy488 nikeboy488
    26-30, M
    1 Response Jan 14, 2014

    I left my wife in August

    and immediatly went to speak to a lawyer to file for divorce. I'm still not divorced. She and I have signed papers twice all ready, and we will have to do it again. The first set of paperwork was because of bumbling and the second set was because of bureaucratic nonsense. I...
    VeloAficionado VeloAficionado
    26-30, M
    3 Responses Apr 10, 2014

    The Worst Has Passed, And I Am No Longer In Love.

    I don't know if my wife was full fledged BPD, but I do know that after eight years of being tortured it was the only answer that fit every criteria. Once I finally stood up for myself, it was a hellacious couple of years. The marriage almost fell apart several times. Honestly...
    ShellOfAMan ShellOfAMan
    13 Responses Jan 3, 2013

    I just love how some of you people

    who are BPD wives want to come here for sympathy and help with your issue. I'll get to my story sometime later, but first I want to talk about the abuse that you people put us through. You want us to care and be loving, etc. From the post I read from you people, I think you...
    Poloist71 Poloist71
    46-50, M
    5 Responses Jan 8, 2014

    Inside Their Mind

      A helpful video but it doesnt help in knowing what it feels like to live with a BPD patient constantly. My wife is going to thrapy finally after 6 years of our marriage. She is better than before already, and the medicine is helping. There have been times she drove me so...
    HelleblueStick HelleblueStick
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Oct 5, 2010

    The fragility of a BPD woman can also plug into

    a man’s hero complex. Her constant need for reassurance and support can exaggerate an insecure person’s sense of importance. In fact, it’s not uncommon for narcissistic men to gravitate to BPD women, because each disorder serves the other, says Freed.The borderline patient...
    nikeboy488 nikeboy488
    26-30, M
    3 Responses Jan 15, 2014

    I'm having a rough morning.

    My now exwife Has BPD and we are going back and forth on this topic about my son. My son is at a boarding type school he abused drugs and got into trouble so he was sent there. He shows signs of BPD as well. My exwife is not allowing me to contact him and she says that he...
    cutie7710 cutie7710
    36-40, F
    1 Response Oct 26, 2015

    My english isnt so good im from italy.

    i been with my wife for 10 years 8 dating two years married. i feel if i can never do any thing right or im walking on egg shell's. her mood swings are alot to handle and it stresses me out cuase im very mellow and laid back.one minute she is fine and 5 mins later shes losing...
    wedtoaborderline wedtoaborderline
    31-35, M
    1 Response Dec 10, 2014

    Got Hacked!!!

    So I got a text from my wife last night that she found out that I had sex with another person. It was a bit hurtful cause we are separated and I was very drunk which led a really bad mistake. My wife cheating on me before while we are married and so I felt for one she shouldn't...
    cutie7710 cutie7710
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Oct 27, 2013

    I got out. Best decision of my life.

    Every situation is different, and ending a marriage (particularly when there are children involved, which there are for me) is a serious endeavor that should be a last resort. However... There are some people in the world who are just not ever going to care, or ever going to...
    ericseviltwin ericseviltwin
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Apr 27, 2015

    Married To A BPD Wife! Any Success Stories?

    17 years of marriage, 4children and she attempted suicide. I put up with lots and realized that's not ok. I called 911 after. Are there any success stories? I love her but hate feeling she does not know what love is! The reason it took so long to stand my ground is a combination...
    RyanKM RyanKM
    41-45, M
    8 Responses May 20, 2013

    I haven't posted in a

    while however I wanted to get something out. I seem to attract women that are amazing and beautiful and smart. Also some how have borderline personality disorder. I decided to go out Saturday night and I saw my ex wife out as well. She was beautiful oh man I knew she was going...
    cutie7710 cutie7710
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Nov 20, 2014

    I was married for 15 years

    until I decided to separate from my wife. I ask myself why it took so long, but upon reflection, I did love her. So I have torn apart my family unit, (which includes my 2 beautiful daughters) and live a lonely existence where everyday I question whether or not I have done the...
    catsfan1972 catsfan1972
    41-45, M
    5 Responses Dec 29, 2013

    I Have Been Married To A Borderline For 24 Years.

    I have been married to a woman with BPD for 24 years. I joke its the best five years of my life. Don't get me wrong, there have been many good times in our years together, but they haven't been easy. I had never even heard of BPD until she was diagnosed with it in 2007 after...
    Slartibart Slartibart
    51-55, M
    3 Responses Jul 22, 2013

    We Can Fix This

    That's what the text message read. It made me happy. I wanted so much for us to work together to fix the problems. Little did I know that the only problems were me. I came to discover that by saying "WE can fix this" she meant that we would both focus full-tilt on changing...
    BozoBuckets BozoBuckets
    51-55, M
    9 Responses Oct 27, 2012

    I was from 1991 to 2008.

    We have 2 kids together. This best sums up the life in hell; what's it like? -Depending on the person, the first few days or years will be intense but you will not be subjected to their negative qualities, you'll find yourself in complete bliss and amazing energy. -You will...
    Onewithone Onewithone
    46-50, M
    3 Responses Jan 25, 2016

    I Thought I Was Alone

    HelloI was blind to the illness that my wife had, hoping that she would get better, they were taking her off her meds and everything, she THOUGHT she was getting better, but that couldn't haven't been further from the truth. our arguments started to escalate and finally i had had...
    reacto reacto
    36-40, M
    1 Response Sep 26, 2013

    At my end but hard to leave.

    Married 2 years, together 6. I saw the BPD before the marriage but thought we could work through it. Thought I wasn't trying hard enough. It's hard knowing someone that seems to love you more than you've ever known love but in the same moment make me wish I were on a deserted...
    constantRevelation constantRevelation
    31-35, F
    7 Responses Mar 11, 2014

    I will start by saying

    that my wife does not have a BPD diagnosis... However, I have suspected for a long time that she has this disorder. I am told that it is just me, that it is "all in my head" and that I am crazy... That in mind, I would like to share some experiences and get honest feedback from...
    joeswink joeswink
    31-35, M
    9 Responses Dec 11, 2013

    I've started speaking out about my abusive wife.

    The experience project and many people have inspired me to start a blog to help men who face the same things I have with an abusive borderline wife and spiritual abuse from Christians. If you'd like to check it out: DVOWRD.com
    31-35, M
    1 Response Sep 29, 2014

    My english isnt so good im from italy.

    i been with my wife for 10 years 8 dating two years married. i feel if i can never do any thing right or im walking on egg shell's. her mood swings are alot to handle and it stresses me out cuase im very mellow and laid back.one minute she is fine and 5 mins later shes losing...
    wedtoaborderline wedtoaborderline
    31-35, M
    4 Responses Dec 10, 2014

    My Story Of BPD My Wife Has It...

    Well my story is I meet my now wife in 2003 and My friends told me I was instantly in love but I was stubborn and wanted to be friends. I had a bad breakup before and just wanted to be free. We started dating and we went through normal stages in life, we got married, we had a...
    cutie7710 cutie7710
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Aug 23, 2013

    Update: I Live In A Town Full Of Incompetents

    So as an update to my situation, two months I left my ubstable, borderline wife, filed for divorce, and moved into a new place. I find out yesterday that my petition for divorce never was filed properly. Considering her relationship to some people within the courts, I can't...
    VeloAficionado VeloAficionado
    26-30, M
    1 Response Sep 18, 2013

    Been separated from my wife

    for almost 16 months now. I sporadically hear from her, usually near the holidays, the last time a few weeks before Christmas. She texts and leaves voice mails asking if I have done "anything", meaning filing for divorce. Why doesn't she do this herself? And she can never use...
    cockfrot cockfrot
    61-65, M
    3 Responses Jan 1, 2014

    My brother married a narcissist bpd alcoholic

    that has actually set him on fire. These women can be dangerous too. I won't speak for him but can tell you I like commiserating with him because his devil voodoo queen is so much worse than mine. My wife is high functioning classic bpd from sexual trauma at a young age, death...
    sesesh sesesh
    4 Responses Jun 13, 2014

    Friends And Counselors Of No Help

    Counselors and BPD: How badly they mishandled it or missed it:   I've had to struggle with my wife's issues for years. A counselor recommended that she be tested for BPD- since she fits the profile. She refuses- because she says there is nothing wrong with her. But her extremely...
    airshow1 airshow1
    8 Responses Mar 2, 2012

    I married a borderline 2 years back.

    Initially before marriage, I saw her getting angry like crazy ..wanted to break off but the usual 'sorry..will never do again" stuff had me in. Immediately after marriage, I came to experience her true nature. She used to start blabbering middle of the night..curse everybody in...
    crazy76 crazy76
    41-45, M
    3 Responses Mar 12, 2015

    Please Help Yourself First

    I wrote a story on hear nearly a year ago. It is so similar to everyone else's. lying, debt, rages, manipulation, the list goes on and on. I had just decided to get a divorce. I simply could not and would not participate in that world any longer. It was truly a nightmare. I was...
    pantherfan9625 pantherfan9625
    31-35, M
    6 Responses Jul 27, 2013

    The Other Side

    I am not a guy in love with a BPD women. I AM that women.  I am so very sorry all of you guys suffer because of us. I also commend and acknowledge your love and commitment to your wives/gf. I am so very much aware of what it takes to live AND be with us. We will eat you alive...
    alwaystwisted alwaystwisted
    12 Responses Apr 23, 2012

    Two years ago, I wrote this story: EP Link The

    responses I got helped me a lot in that time. That's why I'm here again. With pretty much the same problem. In that time, I've listened from advices from various fonts. And the great majority of them told me: GO AWAY, as soon as possible. I couldn't. And I'm not sure I can now...
    RodW RodW
    41-45, M
    3 Responses Feb 16, 2016

    I left my wife in August

    and immediatly went to speak to a lawyer to file for divorce. I'm still not divorced. She and I have signed papers twice all ready, and we will have to do it again. The first set of paperwork was because of bumbling and the second set was because of bureaucratic nonsense. I...
    VeloAficionado VeloAficionado
    26-30, M
    Apr 10, 2014
    nelson222 nelson222
    26-30, M
    1 Response Nov 30, 2013

    I found this online and wanted to post it To

    see if it helps anyone "THE DISCOURAGED BORDERLINE – This subcatetory has personality traits similar to the dependent personality disorder – depressive – prone to self-harming behaviours (click here to read my article on this) – angry (although this can often be...
    cutie7710 cutie7710
    36-40, F
    1 Response Feb 9, 2015

    I am not married to a woman with bpd

    but my long term boyfriend suffers from it, with episodes of depression. I am very young and looking at these experiences seem all negative, almost like a horror story. does it always end bad?
    thisistina thisistina
    1 Response Dec 26, 2014

    Hi everyone, That's my first post here.

    I'm writing because I'm really desperate, and need some help. I've come a long way till I discovered what is BPD. I'm 41 years old. My wife and I are together for 20 years now. We have a beautiful 12 year boy, my greatest pride in life. When I first met my wife, she was a sweet...
    RodW RodW
    41-45, M
    11 Responses Jan 9, 2014

    Folks, there are quite number of people

    who have been suffering through this. I too feel like sharing what I have been going through .. We have been married for more than 7 years and have a daughter of age 5. Just after our marriage our trouble started. My wife was critical about almost everything. My job, the city...
    blueocean3 blueocean3
    36-40, M
    5 Responses Jul 10, 2015

    And yet I stay because she's young

    and I love her. I'm older than she is, and while she says things to me like "Kill yourself/do it in front of me so I can see it!" and my eardrums have almost burst from the sheer pitch and intensity of the screeching when she's angry, I know where it all comes from. While she...
    DrFlamecane DrFlamecane
    41-45, M
    5 Responses Jan 19, 2014

    Things I Have Had To Deal With

    For those who do not know what it is like to live with someone with a borderline personality. Here is a small list of the things I could never do in front of my soon to be ex. Touch her on the arm or shoulder to get her attention because that is considered tapping and she hates...
    OmyTVC15 OmyTVC15
    51-55, M
    15 Responses Sep 24, 2012

    My Mother Was Narcissistic, My Now-separated Wife Is A Borderline

    I've been separated from my wife for two months. We were married for 10 years, during which I put up with some of the worst forms of verbal and emotional abuse any person could possibly endure. Seeing a counsellor during my separation has revealed that my mother was a narcissist...
    JasKay JasKay
    41-45, M
    8 Responses Aug 6, 2013

    I Was Feeling Like Forced Into A Plastic Pedophiliac Relationship

    Hello, I had a BPD girl friend for about one year, she was a "high functioning" adult women and when having sex (*1) with her, I felt like being drawn against my will in some sort of ped0philia sexuality on the top of the dummy thing (*1) so it seems that having sex with a...
    plasticRelationship plasticRelationship
    41-45, M
    3 Responses Sep 29, 2013

    Wifes/Significant Others With BPD On This Site.

    My wife is Borderline and I came here to check for new coping skills. Reading through the stories and/or replies, I see wifes/significant others posting here. GO AWAY!!!! Borderlines cannot stand it if something else threatens their domain. I feel they are on here trying to...
    fireman6 fireman6
    46-50, M
    6 Responses Jul 20, 2013

    An Open Letter To Stbx

    One of my favorite movies is the big sleep with humphrey bogart. There is a great scene at the end of the movie where bogart is being held captive by Eddie Mars and Eddie's wife comes in and Bogie tells her "you think you husband is just a gambler don;t you" and she says yes...
    OmyTVC15 OmyTVC15
    51-55, M
    3 Responses Oct 5, 2013
More Stories