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I Am More Of The Suffer In Silence Type

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,394 People

    I'm.trying to stop.crying I'm trying

    so hard but it all comes back and every day I face the same thing those people being so damn cruel in l feel invisible I just want to skip the bad and just go to when I feel happy and I feel like everything isn't gonna go against me I'm sorry for how I haven't tried hard enough...
    neonpinkcupcakelover neonpinkcupcakelover 16-17, F 4 Responses Mar 27, 2015

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    I am selectively social.

    I don't tell specific people that I don't like them, I just bear the pain of being with them. I have a terrible habit, though: even if I'm not very skilled with verbally expressing my dislike, I tend to show it through my actions and gestures. This would make me reek an...
    irispres irispres 18-21, F Nov 15, 2014

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    Its it quite a paradox to give light,

    to shine it into the world around and be in the shaded parts where the light doesn't quite reach... The last place anyone would expect to find shadows is the sun. The source is only a creator. It is not the creation itself. Therein lies the misconception of those like...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Sep 22, 2014

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    People that are around me most (coworkers)

    probably think I am pretty well-rounded and would be surprised to know just how wound up I am inside. My close family and husband get the brunt of my inner dissatisfaction with myself. I really have to fake it to get through the work day sometimes. I love who I am surrounded by...
    BeBeKitten BeBeKitten 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 23

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    Right before all my New Year’s Resolutions

    kicked in, I was at my local fast foodery. There was a new cashier. He was a young big Asian guy with a round doughy face. When I came to the front of the line, his mouth dropped as he stared at me. And by “me,” I mean my chest. He said, “you don’t mind if you ask me...
    CatalinaVanilla CatalinaVanilla 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 13

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    No one knows how I really feel.

    the pain, the sadness, the emptiness, it's all a secret. No one knows I self harm and no one knows how bad it gets. im affected by everything and take it so personally so much that sometimes I hate myself for it. this site is the only place where I share these thought and...
    tamzin100 tamzin100 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 5, 2015

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    My entire life I have been an emotional sponge

    for friends, parents, and others to dump their problems on, and I don't mind that role, I really don't- I like helping people. But I would never want it for anyone else and I would never want to put anyone in that position which is why I keep my problems to myself
    kxCobra kxCobra 18-21, F 3 Responses Oct 22, 2014

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    I'm the type of person

    that stays bottled up most of the time. I cannot stand bothering people with my issues. I like people worrying about me, because it shows they care. But on the other hand, I hate it. Because I want to help them with their issues. I don't want someone else to worry about me when...
    Lanigga15 Lanigga15 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 18, 2014

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    I will never tell anyone in person my pain,

    only online like this, with no face or way to know who I am.
    2b5h 2b5h 18-21, M 1 Response Feb 26, 2015

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    So I actually tried to open up to people

    because you guys know how "experts" say that suffering in silence is unhealthy. *eyeroll* it was the worst decision of my life. I have just been set back five years of emotional growth because I tried to share my feelings. I found that in my life my family and friends don't care...
    Karrotpulp Karrotpulp 18-21 4 Responses Sep 4, 2015

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    Unless I stub my too.

    Then you will hear the rage.
    Cwitmer19 Cwitmer19 16-17, M 2 Responses Oct 22, 2014

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    o, here Will i set up my everlasting rest And

    shake the yoke of inauspicious stars From this world-wearied flesh! Eyes, look yourlast.  Arms, take your last embrace. And, lips, O, you The doors of breath, seal with a righteous kiss  A dateless bargain to engrossing death.'
    anonymous7766554437 anonymous7766554437 22-25, M Dec 14, 2015

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    I've done something I should

    if done years ago. Last night (or early this morning) I finally brought myself to tell mother. For as long as I can remember, I have been sexually assaulted and molested by my cousin. I don't know exactly the amount, but it's happened for many times in the past, and has happened...
    redpanda1997 redpanda1997 18-21, F Dec 30, 2015

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    Today has been such a long day.

    .. I understand you want to play your games, but I really want to talk...
    redpanda1997 redpanda1997 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 30, 2015

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    I Can't Handle It Much Longer

    My entire life I have been struggling with depression and self-esteem issues. I was bullied for part of middle school and even though years have passed since, the things that people said about me have stuck with me. It ruined my whole persona. Their words made me hate myself and...
    taylorietot taylorietot 16-17, F 8 Responses Feb 2, 2013

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    Definitely This....

    I work in childcare and there is one parent which comes in and talks nonstop about her problems. She is often on the verge of tears. She is the opposite to me. When something is wrong, I keep silent especially on big topics. Like my depressed younger sister, the rejection of my...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 2 Responses Sep 14, 2013

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    Why bother others with feelings they care

    nothing for. I don't need your pitty.
    jaymoe79 jaymoe79 36-40, M Nov 12, 2015

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    The Mask.

    Sometimes I feel like a go through my days on autopilot, sucked into my own mind and begin to spiral. Somehow though I seem to go through the motions and fake my way through the day to family member and colleagues, almost like I have a mask on. My mask is lovely, always...
    thisoldroutine thisoldroutine 31-35, F 5 Responses Oct 21, 2013

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    I don't have a bad life I just don't like to

    bother other people with my problems
    creativelyinsane1999 creativelyinsane1999 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 16

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    This Song I am singing

    for my Family and Friends of Boston and Hawaii Honolulu and Tempe... Apni to jayse tayse ! Thori ayshe oh ayshe apka keya hoga jonabe ali? ap ka keya hoga ? jonabe ali? apkeya age na pise? na koi upar niche?.
    shamimjain shamimjain 41-45, F Dec 31, 2015

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    The Outside

    To everyone who sees me, I laugh, I joke around, I smile. I look happy. You believe that I am, you think I have friends and everything is okay. But what I wish you would know is that when I go home, when I'm alone, I have only myself to talk to, and I cry almost every night. It...
    SolarBird SolarBird 18-21, F Sep 19, 2013

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    Is it wrong too not always share things

    that make you feel depressed most? I just feel like no one will ever know 100% how you're feeling. I feel like in order to make it out stronger we have to fight our battles alone sometimes, or am I wrong? I'm hoping brighter days start coming for me soon, been followed by this...
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Apr 17, 2015

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    When you have pretty much been on the outside

    looking in your entire life, it becomes completely normal. You think no one will ever care or try to understand.
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic 36-40, F 1 Response Oct 8, 2015

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    But i do know that in the end

    that builds up and you will explode.. I am dealing with that and I tend to be very unstable when it comes to my emotions. I don't know how to express myself and I hate that.. I have so much in me that I kept to myself over the years that now it is driving me crazy and I can't...
    EternityF EternityF 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 14

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    My life isn't shìtty

    or anything. I just think it's easier to keep it to myself. It's...
    AliasSapien AliasSapien 18-21, M Jan 14

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    I never tell anybody anything

    because people always try to throw stuff in my face when they get mad. Relationships, finances, and heartbreaks are all kept to myself
    Blair12 Blair12 16-17, F 3 Responses Sep 2, 2015

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    Looking At Me

    When you look at me, you might see a bit of weariness in my eyes, a bit of exhaustion in my face, yet you'll almost never know why. I can put on a brave face, grin and bare the pain, but there are times where I will just express my emotions. I won't tell you my problems, I won't...
    Sleaxor Sleaxor 18-21, M Oct 2, 2013

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    I am only because people told me I was

    so depressing and brought them down. I was called an attention seeker and had no friends or anyone to talk to. never included in any plans that were discussed in front of me either. now it forever ruined me. I don't tell anybody anything. it's safer that way. you won't lose...
    Viciouspistols Viciouspistols 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 27, 2015

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    MY SILENCE.... means i am tierd of fighting

    and now theres nothing to fight for. My silence means i am tierd of explaining my feelings but now i have no energy to explain them anymore. My silence means i have adapted to the changes in my life and i dont want to complain. My silence means i am on a self healing process and...
    known23 known23 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 11, 2015

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    You never know how strong you are

    until being strong is the only thing you can do. I'll be dying on the inside but still look you dead in the eyes and say I'm fine. (:
    ReminiscentMistake ReminiscentMistake 16-17, M 1 Response Jan 14

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    I won't show you my pain I won't give you the

    satisfaction of seeing how much you hurt me I'll smile through gritted teeth The tears fall only when I'm in a safe place My payback to you will be indifference
    sophiebelle27 sophiebelle27 26-30, F 2 Responses Dec 19, 2015

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    I tried to put myself out there again.

    .. Just to get stomped on again...
    Flyyer73 Flyyer73 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 10, 2015

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    Because Id rather suffer

    than be in the illusion of fake and pointless happiness.
    Wheresmywayout Wheresmywayout 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 26, 2015

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    This is the way society has conditioned us to

    be, I'd rather be open and honest with people about it, if I was, I wouldn't be using this site, at least not seriously anyway. But it's draining opening up to people who don't understand or empathise. I don't want sympathy or pity, I just want people to understand.
    theotherusernamesweretaken theotherusernamesweretaken 26-30, M 1 Response Nov 12, 2015

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    Yep. I say nothing until one point

    where it's just too much and.... BAM!!!! And I just go off like a bomb.
    YouCantEscapeMyDemons YouCantEscapeMyDemons 13-15, M 2 Responses Oct 18, 2014

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    it's easier this way.

    no one asking you what's wrong. it's amazing what a smile can do. I never felt so depressed then right now. I thought I was becoming fine but nope, what I fool I was to think I could possibly be fine. I feel so restricted and hurt. nothing ever feels the same
    awayfromlife awayfromlife 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 27, 2015

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    I am too considerate,

    I hate burdening people emotionally, financially etc so I just keep things bottled up, I keep things from my parents, from everyone, sometimes I wish I could share my pain but I hate being a burden so I think this is the root of it all
    nicky411 nicky411 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 1, 2015

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    At one point I was a Psychology major.

    I thought to myself, I'll hear people's problems and help them out because it's what I like to do. Then, one day, a man said to me, "You'll be hearing others' problems, but who will be willing to hear yours?" I said, "No one, because I suffer in silence. Until I've had enough...
    justanothersteph justanothersteph 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 14, 2014

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    I act tuff cause I want no one to know I'm

    suffering yet I get mad when no one notices my suffering.
    mewkitty911 mewkitty911 16-17 4 Responses Dec 31, 2015

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    It's not the thought

    that no one would understand, or no one cares that keeps me silent. It's the thought that it's my problem, it isn't theirs. I should deal with it, I should cope with this, I should exhaust myself trying to figure out a solution. I don't want them to feel my pain, no one needs to...
    RandomExistence RandomExistence 16-17, M 2 Responses Nov 11, 2015

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    This actually goes with my last post :P I

    didn't know I had this :P but yea if I'm in pain i'm not going to bring it up. I prefer to just let people go about their business :) Like in my last post. If someone forgets they said they'd do something with me then it just won't happen because I don't want to seem like a...
    Raptax231 Raptax231 22-25, M Dec 7, 2014

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    I'll paste that smile on my face like humanity

    depended on it. I think maybe it's because I don't feel anyone will care enough about whatever it is that bothers me or affects me. So I suffer through it alone, until I feel better.
    SugarPlumDreams SugarPlumDreams 31-35, F Nov 27, 2015

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    why can't I just tell people how I feel

    and get over it? why do I think internalizing will always be better? It never is. Eventually everything comes crashing down. And I'm too tired for another round.
    mirrorimage99 mirrorimage99 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 30, 2015

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    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest

    souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars. -Khalil Gibran
    FullCircleO FullCircleO 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 10, 2014

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    adianoeta adianoeta 26-30, F 2 Responses Sep 12, 2014

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