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I Am My Own Worst Enemy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 19,637 People

    I have depression. It's so,

    so hard. Every day is a battle for survival against myself. The worst part is nobody seems to believe me.
    MasqueradeMe MasqueradeMe 13-15, F 6 Responses Nov 4

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    I'm an extreme over thinker.

    (Call me pretty? I spend legit 2 hours over thinking if u just said that or u meant it) I have a low self confidence. (I really have no reason for it I just do dill with it) I tend to care for other more then myself leaving me at the point where I know nothing about myself (I...
    dambookworm14 dambookworm14 13-15, F 9 Responses Nov 13

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    Goodbye

    Most people, here on ep wont care about this. But I am typing this just to get it off my chest, anyway. People (my friends, now former coworkers, etc) always love the 'fun' Joey. No one likes the 'sad Joey'. Suffering from depression sucks. Mostly for me because I have to live...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    I post pretty pictures of my life

    but inside I have no idea what I'm doing with it.
    jadiss1 jadiss1 22-25, F 3 Responses Aug 18

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    I'm making a lot of bad decisions lately,

    consciously making them. What is my problem? Why do I feel the need to self destruct?
    lilHuman lilHuman 22-25, F 9 Responses Aug 20

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    After being in therapy

    for quite some time now, I see that other people think highly of me and I get told that I am cute and adorable. I spend so much time getting ready everyday to make myself look as good as possible and I spend so much time looking in the mirror (not in a conceited way) trying to...
    Missprincessgabby Missprincessgabby 16-17, F 10 Responses Aug 14

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    I deflect. I deflect

    so well that a lot of the time I don't know I'm doing it until the conversation is over. I can slide a discussion back over to someone and their issue with apparently pretty good ease. It's all part of not being comfortable with my own thoughts and feelings. But that's a trap...
    PinkBunnyBlackHeart PinkBunnyBlackHeart 36-40, F Nov 15

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    I am slowly killing myself.

    I am using crystal meth, I have a eating disorder BUT I don't think that it is from my meth use.. -I have struggled with myself (body image wise) for a long time now- And I don't care if it kills me, I'm ready to die. I have nothing left. Nothing worth living for. I've lost...
    Tesla08 Tesla08 22-25, F 6 Responses 3 days ago

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    RainSword RainSword 18-21, F 6 Responses Oct 16

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    littlesuicidle littlesuicidle 13-15, F Nov 8

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    I really hate myself.

    You know how I've coped? I helped my enemies. Made sure they are doing great, and I'm doing my job to hate me.
    nogoodnamesleft26 nogoodnamesleft26 16-17, T 1 Response a week ago

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    I convince myself to believe

    that I am not worthy of things I've felt fully worthy of before. At times I truly don't believe in myself.
    clamthatjams clamthatjams 22-25, F 5 Responses Oct 24

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    I have recently decided to stop being my own

    worst enemy. I have recently decided to try to change things for the better and care more about myself.
    saddeena saddeena 41-45, F 12 Responses May 3

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    "You" he said "are a terribly real thing in a

    terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why your in so much pain"
    everythingburns everythingburns 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 12

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    I can't hold this anymore.

    I've always been kinda a loner but now I really am alone. I'll graduate soon and life just isn't getting better. I have no friends and I'll never have a relationship. I don't know how I can live like this.
    luckynumber32 luckynumber32 18-21, M 5 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    " You are your own worst enemy.

    If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness that has always eluded you" - Lisa Kleypas , Love in the Afternoon I have to learn to remove all these negative thoughts in my head... And apply this quote more to my...
    Aubrey0914 Aubrey0914 22-25, F 5 Responses Oct 21

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    aessis aessis 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 10

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    I been trying to study

    but I just can't get focused and it's so frustrating asdsghfj I seriously read like half a page and my mind starts to randomly think about anything and everything at the same time 😠😠
    alek42 alek42 18-21, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    The only person I've ever fought in my whole

    life was myself. It will drive you mad!
    Salute2MyFlaws Salute2MyFlaws 18-21, F 8 Responses Nov 8

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    Sometimes I just wish I was someone completely

    different.... Sometimes I just can't handle it.. :'(
    NessD98 NessD98 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 8

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    elliefuentes6 elliefuentes6 13-15, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I keep putting up with my girlfriend texting

    her ex, even though she knows I don't like it. I even broke up with her over it but she begged for us to try to work it out. Yet again I saw his name on her phone while she was texting a friend of hers. I don't understand how she can say she loves me, yet stays in contact with...
    MrShinra MrShinra 31-35, M 3 Responses Nov 18

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    Danceofhours Danceofhours 36-40, M 5 Responses Oct 24

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    I have like a handful of Me's ( myself )

    standing or in front of me, and their all blocking me to things I want in life. And because it's me, I should be able to move them out of the way right? But I can't. I don't know how to move stuff out of my life that I'v put here. It drives me crazy, cause it's nobody else...
    Salute2MyFlaws Salute2MyFlaws 18-21, F 9 Responses 4 days ago

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    I know only I can make myself happy,

    and believe me I've tried. Being caught up in the mess I'm in, I'm not sure I can keep up anymore. Why is it so ******* hard to just become happy? I'm killing a piece of myself everyday, soon I'll be completely dead..
    trinoctal trinoctal 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 11

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    i dont have no strength to cry i dont have any

    reason to die i cannot smile back again but i cannot find the real pain the pain that changed the air the pain that seemed not fair hard enough to break one or two but i cant find what broke or who what is life? asked the death its what that comes before you its the rule you...
    Dobev Dobev 18-21, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I really wish I knew how to handle my emotions

    and situations better. -feeling really down on myself.
    createmeover createmeover 18-21, F 8 Responses Oct 24

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    lanna620 lanna620 16-17, F 1 Response Sep 3

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    I've had my eating disorder

    for about 7 years now give or take and have developed such bad anxiety that I have been unable to go to school some days because I feel like a disgusting fat monster. I set myself back so much because of this and am now behind and have no clue where I want my life to go now...
    christina9058 christina9058 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 15

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    Without a doubt, I am.

    I know exactly how to stop letting myself get used, it's easy, just don't go out alone to parties where I don't know anyone. If i'm at a party with friends, nothing happens. It's not even that they have to stop anything from happening, I'm simply a different person, I'm always...
    hayliepartychick hayliepartychick 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 19

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    aprilrainstorm aprilrainstorm 13-15, F a week ago

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    I'm such a hazard to myself.

    I really am having a hard time trying to grasp my life that I've lost the past years attempting to be what I was just a little ago. I know now that I will never be the girl I was. I will. Continue to be the lonely anorexic heartbroken girl, who is lost with life
    cwisniski cwisniski 16-17, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Frustrating

    i do destructive things to myself all the time. not only do i abuse alcohol and drugs. i smoke, eat horrible foods, and tan. and these are just a few things. on top of all of this, i'm a self mutilator. i'm destroying myself. and right now. nothing of significance has happened...
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 17 Responses Jul 2, 2007

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    A sense of panic set in today.

    Pacing the floors, trying to settle the mind. My normal method was not working. I was close today. Still am I suppose. I had to get out of my house, be by people. It didn't even have to be anyone I knew. Just people. So I couldn't do what I wanted. I had a destination in mind...
    PinkBunnyBlackHeart PinkBunnyBlackHeart 36-40, F 5 Responses Nov 13

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    I literally put myself into bad moods just by

    thinking. And usually it's extremely unexpected. I'll be having a decent day, but then something totally minor and not really a big deal at all happens and I get so down on myself. It's awful because I know I need to relax and brush it off but my mind won't stop. I viciously...
    brimc7 brimc7 16-17, F 12 Responses Nov 5

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    My worst enemy is not those I can see

    but my head and heart that deceives me. I have learned much from the mistakes and heartache from those that I found out are shallow and fake.
    quito1969 quito1969 41-45, M 4 days ago

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    Pretty much sums it up.

    Most days I'm my own best friend. But lately.. my thoughts consume me and I am completely numb. I can't drown my demons.. they know how to swim. :/ hopefully though things will change and whatever's meant to be will work out the way it should.
    SaraBear87 SaraBear87 26-30, F 6 Responses Nov 10

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    My boyfriend (or ex now I suppose) left me a

    note leaving me during the week. We've had a really difficult weekend - both being petty but he was pretty cruel too. He has rang and apologised, even telling me my life is really good, he just wasn't happy. I've began moving back into my parents but my self esteem is shot. I...
    missdan missdan 22-25, F 4 Responses Aug 4

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    I live a double life,

    I go to work in a good office act professional like I have my life together and when I leave I pop a few pills smoke some weed and stay out all night with the man I'm in love with.. We have rough passionate sex unlike anything I have ever experianced and I cover my bruises and...
    katharine8891 katharine8891 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 27

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    I will drink the poison

    if it means somebody else won't have to.. but I've downed so much of it expecting it to make me immune, but instead I'm completely destroyed. Now idk what to do. Where to go from here?
    NotFirstNotLast NotFirstNotLast 18-21, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I'm not suicidal but I think I beat myself down

    for all the mistakes I've done. For all the things I did and did not do. For what I am and what I am not. I am my own worst enemy and it's hindering my happiness.
    sugarprincess23 sugarprincess23 22-25, F 8 Responses May 30

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    In Neglect, Thank You Robert Frost.

    They leave us to the way we took, as two in whom they were proved mistaken, that we sit sometimes in the wayside nook, with mischievous, vagrant, seraphic look, and try if we cannot feel forsaken.
    SilentBluemoon SilentBluemoon 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 6, 2013

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    I talk to myself in my head.

    ..daily...it seems like all the time. Most of it is negative crap. How stupid, fat, unloveable, pathetic I am...how I'm not pretty enough, smart enough, thin enough, good enough, etc. It's tiring. I can't imagine letting another person talk to me like that & putting up with...
    RubyLane RubyLane 41-45, F 5 Responses Sep 19

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    Whenever I feel depressed I just end up beating

    myself over it, and sometimes it really feels like I'm making a big deal out of something that shouldn't be bothering me so much; still I can't help but feel horribly sad.
    sleepsoundsnice sleepsoundsnice 16-17, F 5 Responses Nov 13

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    I make all of my ex run off with my insecurities

    and negativity i try to stop acting on impulse but I just can't help it sometime I wonder do I have a mental illness
    allofme26 allofme26 26-30, F 4 Responses Nov 17

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    I think I met a women

    who makes me feel good but I am married with kids and I can only have a discreet affair I feel bad for her but I have been honest with her from the first moment I talked to her and she is willing to come see me do I go through with it I really need to get ****** or do I stay...
    Toobusy44 Toobusy44 36-40, M 5 Responses Nov 13

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    So lately I've been accusing my boyfriend of

    cheating because I'm seeing these 2 girls snapchatting him and being on his best friends list so this week I've been constantly asking him about it and he is saying no and that he would never. And today while on the phone I told him that I do have test issues and that I only...
    lilbum97 lilbum97 16-17, F 3 Responses Nov 14

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    Don't you hate when you try to have a

    conversation with yourself and you are told to shut up. :/
    NoOneImportantNow NoOneImportantNow 46-50, M 4 Responses Aug 14

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    I know that my friends does not care

    who I really am and that I can tell them anything but I can't I'm to scared and or I don't want them to say something mean
    beautyrose13 beautyrose13 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 11

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    Tripping saved me. Creatively

    and lovingly πŸ’•
    createmeover createmeover 18-21, F 4 Responses Nov 12

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    Ive cutt my arms up for 7 months without

    stopping besides when being in the hospital i scratched
    NoLoveInMe NoLoveInMe 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 16

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    I really don't know who I am anymore.

    I know changes in my life need to be made and so desperately want them but always end up finding an excuse or reason not to make them. I convince myself that things are ok for so long and then end up having a really bad night like tonight. I hate me for pitying myself and end up...