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I Am My Own Worst Enemy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,969 People

    But It's Actually Quite A Positive Thing

    I actually get along great with myself. There's still a little subconscious clutter in there waiting to be burned through, but on the whole my brain is pretty cooperative. No thing and no person out there has the power to eff with my like my own brain can. Natural or...
    slow4speed slow4speed 22-25, F 4 Responses May 24, 2012

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    I think everyone is their own worst critic

    but what hurts the most is picking yourself apart flaw by flaw noticing things you know no one would actually notice or care about but you do it anyway. If you don't you get more insecure and paranoid, your observations can become distorted and you believe every negative comment...
    HidingTheScars HidingTheScars 13-15, F 1 Response May 3

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    An Island Kingdom

    As I close my eyes I see myself sitting on a throne in the middle of a desolate Island. Along the shores expand bridges leading to the mainlands, each bridge representing a relationship, past and present; friends, family, lovers and aquaintances, and one large arched bridge, a...
    Lemartes Lemartes 31-35, M 1 Response Sep 21, 2012

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    Frustrating

    i do destructive things to myself all the time. not only do i abuse alcohol and drugs. i smoke, eat horrible foods, and tan. and these are just a few things. on top of all of this, i'm a self mutilator. i'm destroying myself. and right now. nothing of significance has happened...
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 17 Responses Jul 2, 2007

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    Im always losing my head,

    I comare to other people at my job and nit pick, ugh, my I can be happy and get along!! what is wrong with me!
    Starcraft119 Starcraft119 26-30, M Feb 14

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    Everything I Do Holds Me Down

    Everyone always tells me I am a nice person and everything, but I refuse to believe them, and instead choose to believe that they are just trying to be nice. All the things I tell myself keep me from really doing what I want to do, but I just don't see myself as good enough. Out...
    Distanced Distanced 16-18, M 13 Responses Jan 10, 2007

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    I decided to break up with my boyfriend

    and move out . I'm 26 weeks pregnant! I told him I hated him and it wasn't working... Well I didn't mean any of that! I love him so much. I thought that maybe if I left he would chase me and want me back. The reason I was mad is because all I wanted was attention. Now he won't...
    Juliaw08 Juliaw08 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 12

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    Denying myself the things

    that would benefit me; fearing uncertainty and "newness" along with failure. I do not physically harm myself, but it is purely emotional. I am seeking/wishing to leave this mentality being purely sick of it.
    asert12345678 asert12345678 31-35, M 1 Response Apr 2

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    converted converted 46-50, M Jun 8

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    Revelation Of The Daemon Seed

    This is an old poem, the one poem I have ever felt has come close to my own expectations and criticisims, though still falling short. The relevance however still stands true. Of late I have been feeling an overwhelming desire to return to my old ways, once again drowning my...
    Lemartes Lemartes 31-35, M Sep 19, 2012

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    Goodbye

    Most people, here on ep wont care about this. But I am typing this just to get it off my chest, anyway. People (my friends, now former coworkers, etc) always love the 'fun' Joey. No one likes the 'sad Joey'. Suffering from depression sucks. Mostly for me because I have to live...
    deleted deleted 26-30 15 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    My Character Flaws Are the ...

    My character flaws are the downfall of me.  My naivity lets people get the best of me.  I get hurt easily and let myself down.  I'm so afraid of failure that I sometimes don't even try.  That's why I set my standards and goals so low that I don't ever...
    theophania theophania 22-25, F 5 Responses May 13, 2007

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    I am my own worst enemy

    and I can't change that. I want to be able to show my real self but my body keeps me from doing so. I am a free and happy soul but being FAT makes it all hard.
    Fatimatam Fatimatam 16-17, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    I am totally my own worst enemy.

    You would think that after making mistakes you would Learn from them....me...well I carry on regardless. In doing so I have hurt others ....wish I would learn old enough...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Dec 31, 2013

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    "Don't let your fear determine your future" .

    .... Something I've learned over the past few weeks .
    ilovevintage ilovevintage 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 6

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    I have a monster that lives between my own two

    ears , I can hear him now unlike before, I understand where he comes from, for the longest time I just want him to disappear to go away, but now I've came to realize that my past experiences and environments and the way I've interpreted and responded to things put that voice...
    thislifeofours thislifeofours 22-25, M 1 Response Feb 18

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    Without intending to be.

    Usually it's from me running my mouth with too brainy and intellectual stuff trying to add to a conversation. It's very offputting and intimidating for most people. If I could just shut the **** up and talk less!
    Lovethebump Lovethebump 26-30, M 4 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    I Never Touched The Hot Stove

    I am twenty-one years old, and I feel like I missed out on those teenage years where I was supposed to do stupid things like sneak out of my house and make out with people and be a stupid teenager. I have always learned my lessons easily- like too easily. I learned not to touch...
    Nereida13 Nereida13 22-25, F 4 Responses Apr 15, 2011

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    Relief

    As the blade run through my skin, I felt the familiar relief. I could still feel then, I wasn't the hollow shell I thought I was. I watched the blood ooze and smile. One day this would all be over.
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 17, 2013

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    In Neglect, Thank You Robert Frost.

    They leave us to the way we took, as two in whom they were proved mistaken, that we sit sometimes in the wayside nook, with mischievous, vagrant, seraphic look, and try if we cannot feel forsaken.
    SilentBluemoon SilentBluemoon 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 6, 2013

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    My Mind Is My Prison.

    Sometimes I am afraid that I am the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I feel like every time I try and do something that might make my life better, my mind says no. It keeps me from going out and doing things, from being social. For example right now, all I can think...
    thequietguy thequietguy 18-21, M 9 Responses Mar 2, 2011

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    As a child,I often heard my mother say on

    countless occasions "Phillip your a glutton for punishment" meaning I willingly did things that were detrimental to my health and well being. Eating foods or drinking tea that was super sweet or super acidity that would later make me sick and go to the doctor or the emergency...
    TheBrooklynKid TheBrooklynKid 46-50, M 1 Response Feb 18

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    When I am down and depressed I become my own

    worst nightmare. I am not sure if I am unique or not but my way of dealing with it is a bit like Carrie in homeland, I want and need sex, not for my own pleasure but I want to give others pleasure, I want them to control me and own me for the time. Like now I can feel myself...
    pwis2648 pwis2648 31-35, M 1 Response Jun 17

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    I am my own worst enemy.

    I constantly make my self feel worthless. I blame myself for everything bad that happens in my life.
    Angela1989 Angela1989 22-25, F 5 Responses Apr 6

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    Mistakes

    I have to admit that most of the mistakes in my life came from my own actions. Stupid mistakes that I could have avoided because I knew better. The consequences of some of these actions were huge. I'm tired of learning from my mistakes.
    pentupfreedom pentupfreedom 46-50, M Dec 12, 2012

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    Without a doubt, I am.

    I know exactly how to stop letting myself get used, it's easy, just don't go out alone to parties where I don't know anyone. If i'm at a party with friends, nothing happens. It's not even that they have to stop anything from happening, I'm simply a different person, I'm always...
    hayliepartychick hayliepartychick 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 19

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    I'm an enigma. I can't think of one word to

    describe me. I'm patient, but impatient when someone has my heart in the palm of their hands. I'm strong, but I don't have a ton of muscle mass. I'm a sophisticated young man, but I make mistakes that just frustrate me. I am my worst enemy at times, but every experience is a...
    misterverde misterverde 22-25, M 1 Response Mar 15

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    I'm not suicidal but I think I beat myself down

    for all the mistakes I've done. For all the things I did and did not do. For what I am and what I am not. I am my own worst enemy and it's hindering my happiness.
    sugarprincess23 sugarprincess23 22-25, F 8 Responses May 30

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    I have recently decided to stop being my own

    worst enemy. I have recently decided to try to change things for the better and care more about myself.
    saddeena saddeena 41-45, F 13 Responses May 3

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    I can sabotage myself better

    than any fried or family member. I will think and doubt and overthink and blow up. It's dumb
    AlwaysPersevere71 AlwaysPersevere71 41-45, M Jun 19

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    Having been emotionally abused in the past,

    I feel like the whole world is against me. If someone doesn't respond to me, it's because they don't like me. If the wifi isn't working, someone disconnected it so that I won't be able to use it. If someone talks to me, it's because they want to use me one way or another. I've...
    tryingtobeashappyasiappear tryingtobeashappyasiappear 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 20

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    Beat Myself Down

    I have always been my own worst enemy.  I have been my toughest critic for years.  I'm not sure I have always deserved the way I beat up on myself but for some reason I felt/feel compelled to do it. I was asked, once, how I would feel if someone was beating up on...
    darlene darlene 41-45, F 8 Responses Nov 6, 2008

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    Of course I am. I want to be a writer.

    I am obsessive to the point of insanity. I will spend hours rewriting the same sentence, rephrasing the same paragraph continuously until I either throw my hands into the air in disgust and leave it the way it was in a previous version, or just cut it out altogether. Or, when...
    BlueRosesFadingBlack BlueRosesFadingBlack 18-21, F Feb 7

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    I'm horny & on my period.

    The struggle..
    jaylax13 jaylax13 16-17, F Jun 22

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    Hidden to go unnoticed.

    .. Hurt when no one notices.
    MissWorld33 MissWorld33 36-40, F 4 Responses Mar 7

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    I can tells person to love themselves

    unconditionally, to not let others opinions contribute to their confidence and self esteem, to be confident and love their body, personality, sense of humor, everything... But I absolutely despise myself...
    WhatABeautifulMess97 WhatABeautifulMess97 16-17, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I should make more friends

    but don't know where to begin. My own company seems more appealing
    loobylo loobylo 41-45, F 4 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I've lived a life beyond my years.

    I've been hospitalized twice , have been inpatient once, I had to do partial care for 2 1/2 months which is a half a day inpatient program , have done outpatient therapy once , and now I have to do intensive outpatient where the therapist comes to my house. I have numerous scars...
    Kaylaana Kaylaana 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 1

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    I always wonder If I'm worth living at all

    because I do feel like a burden to society even a nuisance, I'll always try to stop these feelings from getting too much but I sometimes can't stop them.
    NinjaKitteh1999 NinjaKitteh1999 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 13

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    I keep choosing the things in life,

    that make me unhappy. I am confused all the time, sometimes I get clearity... but get so scared I run back to the confusion. I know what I want. I want to move, I want to be near nature. I want 4 seasons, mountains and forest. I feel so at peace when I'm in the woods. It's like...
    buscameenelcielo buscameenelcielo 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 12

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    I'm constantly critical of myself

    because I think I can do better, which I can. However, there comes a time when one has to accept themselves as they are. It's not easy to just get to that conclusion. There are always obstacles that keep us from being who we want to be, but that's life. We all hopefully learn...
    agathashelly agathashelly 26-30, F Feb 4

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    I hate the way I look,

    I've lost over 140lbs and the more I lose the more I hate myself. Really trying to embrace me and my accomplishments but all I see is the flaws. I've been single for years then dated someone three months before they told me that they were settling with me and that they didn't...
    jedimistressg jedimistressg 41-45, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    ******* HELP ME. For a while

    now I keep dreaming about a kid who looks exactly about me. The only major differences are the fact that he has a **** and he has green eyes -- like my dad's. My mom used to tell me that my doctor screwed up and said I was going to be a boy. I used to dream about him when I was...
    ReesesPeaces ReesesPeaces 16-17, F 2 Responses Jan 4

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    My reality is that I live with a tyrannical

    mother so I escape to my mind where Im in control
    koolkidkoko koolkidkoko 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 6

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    I hate myself Every single bit

    if me I hate I call my self fat, ugly, stupid every single day I'm not gonna tell myself what's not the truth I'm being honest to myself I want to change how I think But every time I try it gets worse .... Why can't I just be perfect?
    SofieAvina SofieAvina 16-17, F 2 Responses Jun 17

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    Put Your Dukes Up

    I don't need any help from anyone .... when it comes to kicking my *** .... Thank ya very much. I do a fine job without any help!
    MorningBreeze MorningBreeze 56-60, F 1 Response Jun 18, 2011

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    I have struggled with depression

    for years. I'm a bit better now though the more people know about my depression, the more they question me, the more I blame myself for having depression.
    l3lackmamba l3lackmamba 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 25

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    all the time I feel like

    if I were a nuisance, a burden, and I think "why am I alive if I'm only a nuisance?". and hurts me think about that but sometimes I think that no one need me and I only filling a space, I feel like no one cares anything about me and that makes me think "What's the point of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Mar 12

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    Tormented By My Sin And Failure

    Today I just want to find a refuge or a hole to crawl in. I wish I had known then what I know now. My sin haunts me. There isn't any relief to be found. How can u hide from god. He is always there always judging. I used to run to him with everything now I feel all my prayers...
    maranatha1985 maranatha1985 26-30, F 3 Responses Apr 29, 2013

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    I was the carer of my younger brother who had gotten very very sick, with why he was sick having nothing to do with the next part. After he was battling with drugs for many of...
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    Your actions can be your enemy.
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