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I Am My Own Worst Enemy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 20,270 People

    So my hub watches football on Saturdays.

    I wasn't home most of the day. We had dinner and the one game was over. He got up and left the room. My daughter and I changed the channel to look for something to watch, he came out and said "no..." Took the remote and put another game on. So I went upstairs to do some art. 10...
    sunnygrlamy sunnygrlamy 36-40, F 6 Responses Dec 6

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    I have depression. It's so,

    so hard. Every day is a battle for survival against myself. The worst part is nobody seems to believe me.
    MasqueradeMe MasqueradeMe 13-15, F 6 Responses Nov 4

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    I been crying the last hour

    because of a final exam I took today, and it was so long and I finished in the exact time, and I realized that the last item was wrong and I can't stop thinking about what I could have done to make it right I just don't know why I have to cry because of this, I don't know why I...
    alek42 alek42 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 28

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    I'm an extreme over thinker.

    (Call me pretty? I spend legit 2 hours over thinking if u just said that or u meant it) I have a low self confidence. (I really have no reason for it I just do dill with it) I tend to care for other more then myself leaving me at the point where I know nothing about myself (I...
    sixpackbookworm sixpackbookworm 13-15, F 9 Responses Nov 13

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    I deflect. I deflect

    so well that a lot of the time I don't know I'm doing it until the conversation is over. I can slide a discussion back over to someone and their issue with apparently pretty good ease. It's all part of not being comfortable with my own thoughts and feelings. But that's a trap...
    PinkBunnyBlackHeart PinkBunnyBlackHeart 36-40, F Nov 15

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    I keep putting up with my girlfriend texting

    her ex, even though she knows I don't like it. I even broke up with her over it but she begged for us to try to work it out. Yet again I saw his name on her phone while she was texting a friend of hers. I don't understand how she can say she loves me, yet stays in contact with...
    MrShinra MrShinra 31-35, M 3 Responses Nov 18

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    I talk to myself in my head.

    ..daily...it seems like all the time. Most of it is negative crap. How stupid, fat, unloveable, pathetic I am...how I'm not pretty enough, smart enough, thin enough, good enough, etc. It's tiring. I can't imagine letting another person talk to me like that & putting up with...
    RubyLane RubyLane 41-45, F 5 Responses Sep 19

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    I have got to stop letting people stress me out.

    But given a lifetime of shut up and take it it's easier said than done. I have keep how stressed and depressed I am a secret so long, that no one in my life really sees how past the breaking point I am
    Wantfreedom67 Wantfreedom67 46-50, F 2 Responses Dec 10

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    Goodbye

    Most people, here on ep wont care about this. But I am typing this just to get it off my chest, anyway. People (my friends, now former coworkers, etc) always love the 'fun' Joey. No one likes the 'sad Joey'. Suffering from depression sucks. Mostly for me because I have to live...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    I literally put myself into bad moods just by

    thinking. And usually it's extremely unexpected. I'll be having a decent day, but then something totally minor and not really a big deal at all happens and I get so down on myself. It's awful because I know I need to relax and brush it off but my mind won't stop. I viciously...
    brimc7 brimc7 16-17, F 12 Responses Nov 5

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    Danceofhours Danceofhours 41-45, M 5 Responses Oct 24

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    aprilrainstorm aprilrainstorm 13-15, F Nov 18

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    I saw myself today hanging from a pole with a

    rope tied around my neck. This is getting out of hand. Ropes were all around me.
    allie724 allie724 16-17, F 8 Responses Dec 10

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    I been trying to study

    but I just can't get focused and it's so frustrating asdsghfj I seriously read like half a page and my mind starts to randomly think about anything and everything at the same time 😠😠
    alek42 alek42 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 20

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    RainSword RainSword 18-21, F 6 Responses Oct 16

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    The only person I've ever fought in my whole

    life was myself. It will drive you mad!
    Salute2MyFlaws Salute2MyFlaws 18-21, F 8 Responses Nov 8

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    lanna620 lanna620 16-17, F 1 Response Sep 3

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    Without a doubt, I am.

    I know exactly how to stop letting myself get used, it's easy, just don't go out alone to parties where I don't know anyone. If i'm at a party with friends, nothing happens. It's not even that they have to stop anything from happening, I'm simply a different person, I'm always...
    hayliepartychick hayliepartychick 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 19

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    I will drink the poison

    if it means somebody else won't have to.. but I've downed so much of it expecting it to make me immune, but instead I'm completely destroyed. Now idk what to do. Where to go from here?
    NotFirstNotLast NotFirstNotLast 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 22

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    We dint need dem critiks.

    We critic first. Them hurt. But we is worse on us. Until we learn them is wrong. We are awesome. They categorize for profit. We love despite profit. We is better than them. And help more if we care to. Hope this helps. EP Link
    OddlyScintilating OddlyScintilating 46-50, M Nov 23

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    After being in therapy

    for quite some time now, I see that other people think highly of me and I get told that I am cute and adorable. I spend so much time getting ready everyday to make myself look as good as possible and I spend so much time looking in the mirror (not in a conceited way) trying to...
    Missprincessgabby Missprincessgabby 16-17, F 10 Responses Aug 14

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    My boyfriend (or ex now I suppose) left me a

    note leaving me during the week. We've had a really difficult weekend - both being petty but he was pretty cruel too. He has rang and apologised, even telling me my life is really good, he just wasn't happy. I've began moving back into my parents but my self esteem is shot. I...
    missdan missdan 22-25, F 4 Responses Aug 4

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    I have like a handful of Me's ( myself )

    standing or in front of me, and their all blocking me to things I want in life. And because it's me, I should be able to move them out of the way right? But I can't. I don't know how to move stuff out of my life that I'v put here. It drives me crazy, cause it's nobody else...
    Salute2MyFlaws Salute2MyFlaws 18-21, F 8 Responses Nov 21

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    I have recently decided to stop being my own

    worst enemy. I have recently decided to try to change things for the better and care more about myself.
    saddeena saddeena 41-45, F 12 Responses May 3

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    It seems so here anyway.

    I write things, and take care about how I write, what I write, which words I use, but the censors still don't accept it! I wasn't aware that they had amended the right to self determination in America, it's nod reason why this kind of site is so appealing. Perhaps I should...
    Skjeggstad Skjeggstad 22-25, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    I convince myself to believe

    that I am not worthy of things I've felt fully worthy of before. At times I truly don't believe in myself.
    clamthatjams clamthatjams 22-25, F 5 Responses Oct 24

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    Sometimes I wish my mom would have aborted me.

    She could have saved her and me the time.
    alicefloe alicefloe 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 11

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    I've had my eating disorder

    for about 7 years now give or take and have developed such bad anxiety that I have been unable to go to school some days because I feel like a disgusting fat monster. I set myself back so much because of this and am now behind and have no clue where I want my life to go now...
    christina9058 christina9058 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 15

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    I'm such a hazard to myself.

    I really am having a hard time trying to grasp my life that I've lost the past years attempting to be what I was just a little ago. I know now that I will never be the girl I was. I will. Continue to be the lonely anorexic heartbroken girl, who is lost with life
    cwisniski cwisniski 16-17, F 3 Responses Nov 24

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    Unwittingly ... I test people

    who love me, to take them to the limit. Many of them do not return.
    SugarKaneFarrow SugarKaneFarrow 22-25, F 5 Responses Dec 11

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    Overall, I'm a good person

    but I constantly worry and beat myself up over things. Maybe I don't need to, but I can't help it.
    Reallifeperson Reallifeperson 22-25, M 1 Response Nov 23

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    As I sit here with my thoughts in a ramble,

    I started to unfortunately realized how complex and emotionally damaged I am.. Why is it that at the peak of disappointments, I push people away? Letting my emotions get the best of me.. I just want to know myself again. I want to be strong for myself, knowing that every aspect...
    GettingByDayToDay GettingByDayToDay 22-25, F 9 Responses Dec 7

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    My worst enemy is not those I can see

    but my head and heart that deceives me. I have learned much from the mistakes and heartache from those that I found out are shallow and fake.
    quito1969 quito1969 41-45, M Nov 22

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    "You" he said "are a terribly real thing in a

    terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why your in so much pain"
    everythingburns everythingburns 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 12

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    I can't hold this anymore.

    I've always been kinda a loner but now I really am alone. I'll graduate soon and life just isn't getting better. I have no friends and I'll never have a relationship. I don't know how I can live like this.
    luckynumber32 luckynumber32 18-21, M 6 Responses Nov 25

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    I'm not suicidal but I think I beat myself down

    for all the mistakes I've done. For all the things I did and did not do. For what I am and what I am not. I am my own worst enemy and it's hindering my happiness.
    sugarprincess23 sugarprincess23 22-25, F 8 Responses May 30

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    Don't you hate when you try to have a

    conversation with yourself and you are told to shut up. :/
    NoOneImportantNow NoOneImportantNow 46-50, M 4 Responses Aug 14

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    Frustrating

    i do destructive things to myself all the time. not only do i abuse alcohol and drugs. i smoke, eat horrible foods, and tan. and these are just a few things. on top of all of this, i'm a self mutilator. i'm destroying myself. and right now. nothing of significance has happened...
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 17 Responses Jul 2, 2007

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    I really don't know who I am anymore.

    I know changes in my life need to be made and so desperately want them but always end up finding an excuse or reason not to make them. I convince myself that things are ok for so long and then end up having a really bad night like tonight. I hate me for pitying myself and end up...
    lu3elle79 lu3elle79 31-35, F 16 Responses Aug 2

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    I love being alone, but I get

    so lonely, does anyone else feel this?
    melodyfey melodyfey 18-21, F 9 Responses Dec 9

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    i dont have no strength to cry i dont have any

    reason to die i cannot smile back again but i cannot find the real pain the pain that changed the air the pain that seemed not fair hard enough to break one or two but i cant find what broke or who what is life? asked the death its what that comes before you its the rule you...
    Dobev Dobev 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 25

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    I really hate myself.

    You know how I've coped? I helped my enemies. Made sure they are doing great, and I'm doing my job to hate me.
    nogoodnamesleft26 nogoodnamesleft26 16-17, T 1 Response Nov 19

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    " You are your own worst enemy.

    If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness that has always eluded you" - Lisa Kleypas , Love in the Afternoon I have to learn to remove all these negative thoughts in my head... And apply this quote more to my...
    Aubrey0914 Aubrey0914 22-25, F 5 Responses Oct 21

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    Ive cutt my arms up for 7 months without

    stopping besides when being in the hospital i scratched
    NoLoveInMe NoLoveInMe 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 16

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    I make all of my ex run off with my insecurities

    and negativity i try to stop acting on impulse but I just can't help it sometime I wonder do I have a mental illness
    allofme26 allofme26 26-30, F 4 Responses Nov 17

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    I am slowly killing myself.

    I am using crystal meth, I have a eating disorder BUT I don't think that it is from my meth use.. -I have struggled with myself (body image wise) for a long time now- And I don't care if it kills me, I'm ready to die. I have nothing left. Nothing worth living for. I've lost...
    Tesla08 Tesla08 22-25, F 6 Responses Nov 23

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    I really wish I knew how to handle my emotions

    and situations better. -feeling really down on myself.
    createmeover createmeover 18-21, F 8 Responses Oct 24

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    I post pretty pictures of my life

    but inside I have no idea what I'm doing with it.
    jadiss1 jadiss1 22-25, F 3 Responses Aug 18

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    My verbally abusive partner just left me to

    move to Spain with his parents, because I loved him so much, we agreed to stay in contact, we have spoken every day since he left a month ago, but about a week ago, the verbal abuse started again over texts, emails etc. I know the simple answer is to block him, I do, but then I...
    strawberryblonde89 strawberryblonde89 22-25, F 12 Responses 6 days ago

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    I spend more time worrying about my life

    than doing anything to fix it.
    oceanwalker oceanwalker 18-21, F 4 Responses Aug 19

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    In Neglect, Thank You Robert Frost.

    They leave us to the way we took, as two in whom they were proved mistaken, that we sit sometimes in the wayside nook, with mischievous, vagrant, seraphic look, and try if we cannot feel forsaken.
    SilentBluemoon SilentBluemoon 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 6, 2013

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    People like the things i do,

    it makes them laugh and have fun. But at the end of the day, i just hate how i have to be someone im not.