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I Am My Own Worst Enemy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 16,379 People

    I sabotage my life and sometimes it feels like

    I do it on purpose. I make bad decisions and blow off responsibility in an effort to push me to end it all. I'm not quite ready yet but I can feel the change in me. I live life where everything is temporary and so is everyone in my life. I live with addiction first cutting now...
    SuicideDreams SuicideDreams 31-35, F 3 Responses Sep 11

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    I recently began cutting again

    but to my horror a friend saw me and approached me about it. He made me promise to stop cutting and I gave him my blade but I don't know what to do now. It's not taking away these feelings. I've started starving myself instead. I'm a lost cause. The show I'm in is keeping me...
    deamonsinside deamonsinside 16-17, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    Frustrating

    i do destructive things to myself all the time. not only do i abuse alcohol and drugs. i smoke, eat horrible foods, and tan. and these are just a few things. on top of all of this, i'm a self mutilator. i'm destroying myself. and right now. nothing of significance has happened...
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 17 Responses Jul 2, 2007

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    Tired of crying and yelling.

    Tired of being sad, alone, different, and angry. Tired pretending. Tired of feeling crazy,worthless,empty and stuck. Tired of having to lie about my happiness just to keep someone in my life. Tired of needing help and remembering.tired of missing things and people. Tired of not...
    anonymouss2014 anonymouss2014 18-21, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    Constantly telling myself

    that I'm at a normal weight and that I should love myself just the way I am. On the other hand I see that I could loose a few pounds, tone up, etc. Everyday it a fight between whether I like myself or hate myself
    fallout07 fallout07 18-21, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Sometimes I wonder what I'm doing with myself.

    I wonder am I going in the right directions? Is there a right direction? Is it even a matter of right or is it just a matter of mind. Does that even make sense? I kno what I want to do but I feel I'm too cowardly to go forward with it. The easy way. Why must it hurt the most?
    gypsisoul gypsisoul 22-25, F Aug 26

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    Sometimes i do things just to hurt myself.

    Sometimes its like i push myself to my limits for whatever reason i can come up with. I am trying to chase a dream that i finally have. I finally have direction in my life but i feel awful. I constantly feel weak these days. I have difficulties being alone. And i left the best...
    needtogobutnot needtogobutnot 22-25, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Ok, so this is going to be a terrible

    confession. You may think I'm horrid, but I believe in honesty, so here goes. When I was younger, I used to be friends with EVERYONE. As I got older, I became more judgmental. I cast aside cousins and friends I'd known my whole life. Mostly, I did so because I felt they paid...
    SupernovaxGirl SupernovaxGirl 26-30 3 Responses Sep 12

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    Sometimes I just wish I was someone completely

    different.... Sometimes I just can't handle it.. :'(
    NessD98 NessD98 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 8

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    I feel I do not like me self.

    Every chance I have to success I destroyed it. May be due to fear or careless for any thing, I don't. But I am trying my best.
    peterrizk peterrizk 22-25, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    Overthinking, moodiness,

    laziness, procrastination, caring too much about what others may thing, difficulty to say no...these are my enemies in life.
    Danceofhours Danceofhours 36-40, M 1 Response Jul 30

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    Most say they are their own worst enemy,

    but never really take into consideration that your worst enemy is someone who does everything they can to tear you down and bring you to your knees every chance they get. All day long I beat myself up inside saying these awful things that really screw up my thinking during my...
    ihatemypclife ihatemypclife 16-17, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I have a tendency to make stupid decisions

    and really hurt people but I just don't really think before I do things, it continues to bite me in my butt a lot!!
    1sweetnurse 1sweetnurse 31-35, F 4 Responses Sep 12

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    biggunsatx biggunsatx 36-40, M 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    Am I happy some times,

    but it just goes away after a while. I drink to forget about it, but sometimes it just gets worst, I smoke to relax, and I get high to pretend in happy.
    simplyfuckit simplyfuckit 16-17, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I live a double life,

    I go to work in a good office act professional like I have my life together and when I leave I pop a few pills smoke some weed and stay out all night with the man I'm in love with.. We have rough passionate sex unlike anything I have ever experianced and I cover my bruises and...
    katharine8891 katharine8891 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 27

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    Wtf is wrong with me?

    I bet people think I'm a loon. I can't help it, all the things I've seen and been through. F*** everything that made me like this oh my gosh I waisted so many years fkin up. I have to use this app to get my **** out cause when italk to my friends they go "oh you got it HELLA...
    heartzs heartzs 16-17, F 2 Responses Sep 12

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    Every time I look in the mirror,

    I see my worst and greatest enemy.
    jemdl21 jemdl21 16-17, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Don't you hate when you try to have a

    conversation with yourself and you are told to shut up. :/
    NoOneImportantNow NoOneImportantNow 46-50, M 3 Responses Aug 14

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    "You" he said "are a terribly real thing in a

    terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why your in so much pain"
    everythingburns everythingburns 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 12

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    I'm making a lot of bad decisions lately,

    consciously making them. What is my problem? Why do I feel the need to self destruct?
    lilHuman lilHuman 22-25, F 8 Responses Aug 20

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    Nothing's gonna change anytime soon.

    I'm kinda just stuck in this spot, and can't move from it. I feel like it's getting worse, but strangely feel like it might get better. It's just nothing's different. The people are, but the way I feel tords myself, and the way everything at school is. It's just boring and I...
    zoee01 zoee01 16-17, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I spend more time worrying about my life

    than doing anything to fix it.
    oceanwalker oceanwalker 18-21, F 4 Responses Aug 19

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    After being in therapy

    for quite some time now, I see that other people think highly of me and I get told that I am cute and adorable. I spend so much time getting ready everyday to make myself look as good as possible and I spend so much time looking in the mirror (not in a conceited way) trying to...
    Missprincessgabby Missprincessgabby 16-17, F 9 Responses Aug 14

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    Everything I Do Holds Me Down

    Everyone always tells me I am a nice person and everything, but I refuse to believe them, and instead choose to believe that they are just trying to be nice. All the things I tell myself keep me from really doing what I want to do, but I just don't see myself as good enough. Out...
    Distanced Distanced 16-18, M 13 Responses Jan 10, 2007

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    I'm battling anorexia

    and low self esteem..
    NeedForBones NeedForBones 13-15, F 3 Responses Sep 9

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    So I have never really had sex with someone

    that I wasn't intending on being in a relationship with but I don't want to be in a relationship at all. I do want to have sex but I am either uncomfortable or self conscious or maybe both. I really don't know what's stopping me. I want to just be like **** it and do it but I...
    ynobe ynobe 22-25, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    I'm horny & on my period.

    The struggle..
    jaylax13 jaylax13 16-17, F Jun 22

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    I really don't know who I am anymore.

    I know changes in my life need to be made and so desperately want them but always end up finding an excuse or reason not to make them. I convince myself that things are ok for so long and then end up having a really bad night like tonight. I hate me for pitying myself and end up...
    lu3elle79 lu3elle79 31-35, F 17 Responses Aug 2

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    Goodbye

    Most people, here on ep wont care about this. But I am typing this just to get it off my chest, anyway. People (my friends, now former coworkers, etc) always love the 'fun' Joey. No one likes the 'sad Joey'. Suffering from depression sucks. Mostly for me because I have to live...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    Sometimes I look at myself

    and think...no wonder no one wants you around...
    suicideDepression suicideDepression 13-15, M 4 Responses Aug 24

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    picses2222 picses2222 13-15, F 4 Responses Sep 10

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    I hate when I put myself down.

    ..I really do. But I just do. I feel so worthless and alone sometimes I want to just run away from it all. I've been depressed for 3 years..since my dad died when I was 14, and I just can't get happy anymore, no matter how hard I try nothing helps.
    500years 500years 16-17, F 10 Responses Aug 24

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    In Neglect, Thank You Robert Frost.

    They leave us to the way we took, as two in whom they were proved mistaken, that we sit sometimes in the wayside nook, with mischievous, vagrant, seraphic look, and try if we cannot feel forsaken.
    SilentBluemoon SilentBluemoon 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 6, 2013

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    I am my own worst enemy

    but the monsters in my head they may just e my best friends....
    danyk12 danyk12 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 12

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    I was betrayed by my best friend,

    the trouble it caused had caused everyone to lose their trust in me.
    sneadle sneadle 16-17, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    "Choose your battles wisely,

    for no battle is worth sacrificing your soul" The greatest battles fought are fought from within. When or why I decided to go to war with myself I have often thought about it. I have become my own worse enemy, the path of self destruction in this endless war with myself has...
    Jay04Sch Jay04Sch 36-40, F 1 Response Aug 8

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    I'm not suicidal but I think I beat myself down

    for all the mistakes I've done. For all the things I did and did not do. For what I am and what I am not. I am my own worst enemy and it's hindering my happiness.
    sugarprincess23 sugarprincess23 22-25, F 8 Responses May 30

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    1 week.... The only thing I have to live

    for is the show I'm in, but that show ends in one week. One the show closes I fear I'll carry through my suicide plans. Unless I find another reason to live
    deamonsinside deamonsinside 16-17, F 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    XxBadXVibesxX XxBadXVibesxX 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 28

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    It is difficult for me to have meaningful

    friendships... I kinda like a lot to be alone but then I find that my relationships with others decay easily. I have my two circle of friends but in none of them I feel completely part of. In college I know a lot of people and do all kinds of works with them...but when the...
    Hoenncreek Hoenncreek 22-25, M 2 Responses Aug 16

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    Hi guys I'm that hatersinc girl I made a new

    account to Chang my age I really want to get rape someone tell me want should I do I don't know why I wish that apon myself I just want to experience it
    hatersbehating hatersbehating 70+, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    Hidden to go unnoticed.

    .. Hurt when no one notices.
    MissWorld33 MissWorld33 36-40, F 3 Responses Mar 7

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    I can never seem to make

    and keep friends. I've never had anybody that I would consider my best friend and that makes me sad. The thing is, I'm not that shy. I talk to people and make sort-of friends that way but whenever they suggest doing something I shut down. I've never really had much free time...
    PinKrossbow PinKrossbow 22-25, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I need some advice about

    whether I should ask my husband of 6 years that if he wants we can get a divorce. Things are great between us. Really, he is a great guy. I am crazy about him. I feel like I love him more than ever. He also says he loves me but I just don't believe it anymore. We met online...
    vallaria vallaria 26-30, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Without a doubt, I am.

    I know exactly how to stop letting myself get used, it's easy, just don't go out alone to parties where I don't know anyone. If i'm at a party with friends, nothing happens. It's not even that they have to stop anything from happening, I'm simply a different person, I'm always...
    hayliepartychick hayliepartychick 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 19

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    At first blush, this seems quite depressing.

    I sometimes make poor choices and then have to deal with the consequences. I can beat myself up pretty bad. When I allow myself to make mistakes, just like I would a good friend. It becomes easier to make better choices, which in turn usually makes my life more enjoyable. I also...
    Luvhugeuptop Luvhugeuptop 46-50, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I feel used Disgusting all over my body I'm

    hurting my self trying to feel something I'm hurt I fell like I'm being told lies I guess I deserve it What am I doing In the end I'm the one who will feel crushed I can't feel this way anymore I need to stop I can't let you see what I hide It's the only thing that's...
    zoee01 zoee01 16-17, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    If tomorrow woman woke up,

    and decided they liked their bodies. Just think of how many industries would go out of business. We are all put on this earth to feel like absolute ****. Too bad it works.
    imabouttoloosemymind imabouttoloosemymind 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 31

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    My boyfriend (or ex now I suppose) left me a

    note leaving me during the week. We've had a really difficult weekend - both being petty but he was pretty cruel too. He has rang and apologised, even telling me my life is really good, he just wasn't happy. I've began moving back into my parents but my self esteem is shot. I...
    missdan missdan 22-25, F 4 Responses Aug 4

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    I talk to myself in my head.

    ..daily...it seems like all the time. Most of it is negative crap. How stupid, fat, unloveable, pathetic I am...how I'm not pretty enough, smart enough, thin enough, good enough, etc. It's tiring. I can't imagine letting another person talk to me like that & putting up with...
    RubyLane RubyLane 41-45, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    austintsnelson austintsnelson 13-15, M 2 Responses Aug 4

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    I have recently decided to stop being my own

    worst enemy. I have recently decided to try to change things for the better and care more about myself.
    saddeena saddeena 41-45, F 12 Responses May 3

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    Sometimes you have to stop

    and think before you judge someone. You need to look at your corruption, before you try to expose someone elses. You need to see if your on the right path, before you guide someone in the wrong direction.