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I Am Newly Separated

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,683 People

    I am going through hell.

    My ex was taken away to the police for domestic abuse.I had 7 years of it.He was so controlling and manipulative. After time in jail and on bail he was found not guilty.I cannot blame police for not doing it the job properly, but thats what happend in my case. My ex partner had...
    sunshone sunshone 26-30, F 4 Responses May 18, 2014

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    So heres my story me

    and my wife seperated a month ago after being married 15 years. I love her but hey we cant get alone. I guess dont give her enough attention she says. I feel just the opposite that I dont get enough attention. Any advice
    Greatguy81 Greatguy81 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 16

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    So today was the first day in accepting the

    change in my life. It's not something I have control over but I have the control from here on out! I don't have much social life and that's gonna take some time to fix. But the friends I do have are there for me. New stage in life.
    seanv14 seanv14 26-30, M 2 Responses Aug 7, 2014

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    Update after last night assault.

    Police have been fab. Still not sure if there's a case but giving a detailed statement ( took 6hrs) made me see my life through others eyes. Also they were able to challenge a lot if what he's told me for year. I've realised several things today; I am a victim of domestic...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 36-40, F 1 Response Apr 9, 2014

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    I Am 34 Years Old And Single Again After Being Married For 8 Years...

    this sounds odd... I often feel lost because now I am on my own, as before I was used to do "couples stuff". I find myself alone and not sure sometimes, we never had kids and for that I am thankful... I have already a history posted in the affair section here in the E.P which...
    devilwife devilwife 31-35, F 10 Responses Nov 26, 2012

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    Quotes That Help Me To Move On...

    It's not what you go through that defines you; you can't always help that. It's what you do AFTER you've gone through it that really tests who you are. Kwame Floyd
    erfra7 erfra7 46-50, M Sep 7, 2013

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    Not Sure...

    I spoke to a clergy member who said if perhaps I journaled that it would be helpful to me... being a guy to start off with talking about feelings is difficult... this is somewhat an extension to the original idea - perhaps something I say will have meaning for another person...
    Liminalghost Liminalghost 36-40, M 11 Responses May 23, 2010

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    I Left My Wife For A Woman I Love

    What's so wrong with that? Honestly, I understand the meaning of marraige but when it comes down to it, do you go through life as a zombie, staying with someone because you're comfortable, or do you make a move that makes both you and potentially your wife a lot happier on the...
    youareasoulyouhaveabody youareasoulyouhaveabody 26-30, M 9 Responses Sep 28, 2013

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    Hi just separated from my partner been together

    for 14 years I met her at work she was married going threw a bad patch we got close was dating for about two years then her hubby found out so she said she s going to try for three months so I said I would wait she didn't speak to me at work would walk past if I didn't exist or...
    gjwood gjwood 36-40, M Aug 9

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    Ok so here it is, 2 weeks

    before Christmas my wife tells me she wants a divorce. Wow I am 25, 3 beautiful children and I'm getting divorced. I don't even know what to say or think. I tried to talk sense into her but she doesn't want to hear a word of it. Since then I have seen her maybe 2 or 3 times when...
    Kwreka89 Kwreka89 26-30, M 2 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    I am newly separated

    and have 2 children. My daughter is 14 and is doing fine with the separation. My son is 12 and is not fine. Right now I just left my place to take a walk after my son does his best to be so fresh and talk back. We have a 9 month old puppy who can be nippy he gets do angry when...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    Next week is what would be our 13th wedding

    anniversary, and 18 years of being together. Last week, I caught my husband in an affair for the third time, and he asked for separation. We have two kids (6yo and a baby) that he barely pays attention to, and is taking off for the weekend - again. He says he hasn't loved me in...
    nerdallthethings nerdallthethings 36-40, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Recently celebrated 15 years of marriage

    and followed up by a legal separation. We have 3 kids and have been together since I was 17 years old. I'm not sure where to go from here. Any advice on coming up with a separation agreement?
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jul 8

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    After weeks of talking

    and not getting to the main issue as to why our marriage failed. Yesterday, we finally spoke really spoke. It was painful hearing that your not loved and haven't been for a long time. That all that time you had spent making things right was a waste. That your only really thought...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 4 Responses Jun 8, 2014

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    Finally settled into my new place!

    It is cozy and comfy and especially with my dog at my side....I am excited and have pangs of loneliness but I am excited for this new start!
    MFeisty MFeisty 41-45, F 4 Responses Mar 1

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    'He Cheated, So Why Do I Feel Guilty?' Update

    Nearly six months now since separating after 24 years. After the initial feeling of devastation, I felt a sense of calm and happiness and wondered if that was just a phase, like some sort of mental coping mechanism. Well, I still feel genuinely happier! I think after so long...
    anewlifealone anewlifealone 46-50, F 4 Responses Aug 26, 2013

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    Learning how to handle living on my own being

    separated only since May 1st. I'm trying to remain optimistic, positive and remove all negativity in my life. I am still very much in love with my wife and we are trying to keep our distance and no contact except for gm/gn text messages until mid September. Taking one day at a...
    DanielUSMC1142 DanielUSMC1142 51-55, M 4 Responses Aug 2

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    I recently separate from my husband.

    We've been married for four years and together for seven. I retired from the military and quit traveling to help him realize his dream. Two weeks ago his dream began to include another woman. I will not dwell on the amount of pain and heartache that comes with the infidelity...
    Selene73 Selene73 41-45, F 3 Responses Aug 23

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    Flip flopping... After our long talk over the

    weekend. He's texting me from work and trying to get me to sleep in the bed with him again. I feel like I need to hurt him over and over to get him to see, what we both already agreed on. This is so, very hard. Roller coaster of a marriage for years and now a roller coaster of...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 4 Responses Jun 10, 2014

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    I got married 3 weeks ago only to discover my

    husband was cheating on me all throughout our engagement..I truly believed he loved me..turns out he's a professional actor and a compulsive liar..I wish I had found out before our marriage..I would have never married him..I don't know what to do..he's begging for another chance...
    doc229 doc229 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 23

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    I'm newly separated.

    after 10 years, my husband told me he doesn't love me anymore. We have no kids. And I feel alone sometimes, mentally fragile, mentally exhausted. I keep myself busy with full time work, taking my dog out. But I don't have many friends, our marriage was a sort of a bubble where...
    AussieOiOiOi AussieOiOiOi 36-40, F 7 Responses Aug 18

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    Recently Seperated

    I have been with my husband since I was 18, together for 20years. He had an affair last year, but we worked through it, he promised never to hurt me like that again, so many promises made, recently found out he is still cheating with the same woman. He had stopped but started...
    Eeyore76 Eeyore76 36-40, F 5 Responses Nov 2, 2013

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    last night she told me everything.

    cant say i blame her for falling in love with someone else. she had been talking to him about everything since April letting him take my place since April having sex with him since April. she didnt hide how she felt about him. she didnt hide he had her attention. she never hid...
    dreamin20 dreamin20 22-25, F Jul 16

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    I am newly separated with a daughter

    who is just turning a year old. The separation was not my choice, but I am trying hard to accept the space we need. I never thought I'd be in this position in my life, especially after all the obstacles we've overcome, including infertility. I miss my best friend, husband, and...
    dirami39 dirami39 31-35, F 5 Responses Aug 8, 2014

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    my wife of 16 years said she wanted a divorce.

    this was 8 months ago. we have three kids (7, 10, and 12). we are still in the same house but in separate bed rooms. no matter what I do she refuses to try to work on our relationship. my heart is broken. I was not the husband that I should have been. I was a good provider but...
    tkdmm tkdmm 36-40, M 1 Response Jul 6

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    I've been married for 23 yrs been together

    26yrs. My husband cheated on my with 31 yrs old at work, he is 56. I found it in his phone. Text messages nude photos of her & her vaginal area. Made me sick. He's my soul mate, best friend. He told me he was missing something. WTF.
    halfperson halfperson 41-45, F 5 Responses Aug 8

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    dunfermliner dunfermliner 36-40, M 1 Response Jul 25

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    I've been separated for 10 months now.

    Been the longest time of my life! I feel lost and confused still. I know I wasn't happy, but at the same time I feel obligated to my family to work it out. My husband is someone who would always rather stay home and not get out and live. We treat each other terrible and argue a...
    Elle340 Elle340 31-35, F 4 Responses Aug 21, 2014

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    My husband and I have been married almost 12

    years and have 3 amazing boys. We've had all the same problems our entire marriage. Mine include social anxiety, being a terrible housekeeper, avoiding confrontation, and being passive aggressive at times. His issues are having a bad temper, being negative, being completely...
    jennylynne jennylynne 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 6

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    I have learned through the years,

    that life is too short to stay in a marriage that is unhealthy. First one, I was with a mental controller. Second one I have just left was with a person who has depression and anxiety. For four years, the meds were not being taken and the struggle of living with a person...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 27

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    It's been on the cards

    for a long time, we married young, had lots of ups & downs over the years, but we stayed together, for us for our children because we didn't want to give up. Neither of us have been happy for a while but I put this down to his mid-life crisis' (he's had a few) Anyway I caught...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jul 15

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    Why Did I Get Married On My Birthday ! Lol

    I am hittin 37 today and today would have also been my 13 year anniversary. This is my first anniversary without her and its been tough. Honestly I am looking forward to the day ending and trying to get back to normal. I just pray for strength, courage, and hope. Best of luck to...
    Sodapopcur Sodapopcur 36-40, M 3 Responses Oct 6, 2013

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    I love being watched

    when I **********
    mattyn mattyn 26-30, M 2 Responses Jul 22

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    Sorry it is so around the place

    but I needed to vent a little SO about 3 weeks ago my fiance and I broke up. Reasons behind it she said that I was immature, financially unstable, and a brick wall to talk to I always tried to talk to her regardless of if I really wanted to or not. I gave her money when I had...
    dreamin20 dreamin20 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 1

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    My girlfriend of 9 months broke up.

    We are in a same sex relationship. I thought we where just having space apart until last night she said it was completely over. I'm so heartbroken and haven't been able to stop reaching her. I'm calling her and texting her and had no response. I don't know what else to do.
    scorpionattitude scorpionattitude 36-40, F 2 Responses Aug 16

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    Been separated for 4 months now.

    A month before our second daughter was to be born I discovered my husband had become an IV drug addict, was actively in a 2 year relationship with a girl who was a user, he titled loaned our cars, stole my savings, my paychecks, my credit cards and maxed out them out. I had been...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 11

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    She Destroyed My Soul

    It's been about 45 hours since I found out. Exactly 4 days since the fuse was lit to the end of my life, as I know it. And now, I am newly, involuntarily, separated. Homeless, family-less, just less. The best years of my life are gone. I can't get those back to spend with...
    phatdog phatdog 36-40, M 4 Responses Dec 14, 2011

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    I've been separated for almost 4 months now.

    I never saw it coming. It was the shock of a lifetime, a cruel surprise. I thought everything was fine. Just two days before he left, I remember thinking I'd never been happier. Blindsided. Devastated. Crushed. Betrayed. Humiliated. Broken. The range of emotions I've...
    Ticia Ticia 26-30, F 1 Response May 21

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    Hi there. I'm just separated 2 months.

    I was the one to end it after years of staying for the kids. The guilt is overwhelming. My ex is desperate to win me back and it makes the guilt worse. I'm afraid I will cave under his pressure & go back to my unfulfilling marriage. Rather torn at the moment. Eva
    eva19091 eva19091 51-55, F 1 Response Jul 25

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    My husband and I have recently separated.

    He just decided abruptly over day (last month). That is was over, he's tired of pretending. That he wasted 15 years and wanted me to leave. It crushed me... I could have faught. I didn't because I agreed. He is begging for me to come back. I won't, and to keep myself busy. I...
    theophaneia theophaneia 31-35, F 2 Responses May 8

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    Between the drinking

    and drug use on his part, the constant neglect and then finally the cheating, it was time I kicked him out of the house. It wasn't good for me or our son. I miss him a lot to be quite honest, but I know it was the right decision.
    HalesBells91 HalesBells91 22-25 1 Response Dec 9, 2014

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    After an 8 year relationship

    and marriage with an alcoholic I have finally decided to move on. The freedom I feel is indescribable! There will definitely be an adjustment period for our two children...but I can be happy knowing that this is ultimately the best decision for all of us. Feeling free and...
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Apr 13

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    Iam newly separated, she is in the same college

    and we have the same friends, we are in a vacation but i dont know what iam gonna feel when i see her again, i dun wanna see her
    wilson015 wilson015 22-25, M Jul 22

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    I'm single and I'm happy .

    .... I do not want my ex back... at all!!!
    Serenita Serenita 41-45, F 5 Responses Sep 19, 2014

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    how can she leave me

    and go be with a married man
    dreamin20 dreamin20 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 10

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    He was charged! I am

    so shocked. If you've read my posts you'll no my police officer husband assaulted me in February and my daughter saw. That was the last straw and I asked him to leave. Since I've done everything to beg him to give us another chance to the point where him going put on a date with...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 27, 2014