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I Am Newly Separated

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,233 People

    I see some posts on here in

    which the author says they're separated but they live in the same house. Help me understand that, please. How can two people be separated yet still live together? Sounds to me just like awkward family life and not separation. I'm not being judgmental. I want to understand in...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses May 26

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    He left and I dream of him every night.

    Nothing romantic but he's there. I'm just so mad that I can't seem to let him go. I don't want to dream of him. He has already stolen so much if my peace. I dont sleep well either because I'm worried about what's to come. Please tell me it gets better.
    sp7799 sp7799 36-40, F 2 Responses May 10

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    FEELING LIKE A FOOL My husband of five

    and a half years recently told me he want to separate, this caught me totally by surprise. iv given my all to this marriage. I've given my love, time, finances and heart to him and his family only to be left feeling like a fool. Maybe I could understand if we weren't getting...
    dmoralesbaez dmoralesbaez 51-55 Jun 21

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    Recently Seperated

    I have been with my husband since I was 18, together for 20years. He had an affair last year, but we worked through it, he promised never to hurt me like that again, so many promises made, recently found out he is still cheating with the same woman. He had stopped but started...
    Eeyore76 Eeyore76 36-40, F 5 Responses Nov 2, 2013

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    I newly single,coming out of 12yr realtionship

    (4yr Married)I Horny all time but not ready4realtionship so gonna read some real life sexy experiences other people have had&how people satisfy. their urges without starting relationships??
    AreUReady4This AreUReady4This 36-40, M 1 Response Jun 13

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    Still living in same house,

    but 1.5 months into separation and I am sleeping better and feel so much calmer and happier. Lots of changes ahead, but feeling optimistic! #batman!
    molly3493 molly3493 41-45, F May 23

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    I have learned through the years,

    that life is too short to stay in a marriage that is unhealthy. First one, I was with a mental controller. Second one I have just left was with a person who has depression and anxiety. For four years, the meds were not being taken and the struggle of living with a person...
    willowofthewoods willowofthewoods 41-45, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I Didn't Want Him to Leave, Just to Love Me

    I know this is going to come off as "needy" or emotionally troubled, and maybe I am, but when my husband of 10 years left 3 weeks ago after a minor disagreement (not even a fight!) and didn't call of take my calls for two days, I was devastated. I think that's what he...
    sagegirl sagegirl 36-40, F 31 Responses Sep 12, 2008

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    Everything is so hard now.

    I miss her. I need someone i feel so alone. I'm scared and I don't know what to do what if she was the one and I lost her forever?
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 16

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    Newly Separated

    Im newly separated from my wife of 4 years and not by choice. I got into a car accident and she kept the insurance money. She left me to struggle to pay for school on my own without even a way to my job. All because I told her 6 months ago that i was sick of our life and wanted...
    LoneAlpha LoneAlpha 26-30, M 32 Responses Jul 1, 2012

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    Not Sure...

    I spoke to a clergy member who said if perhaps I journaled that it would be helpful to me... being a guy to start off with talking about feelings is difficult... this is somewhat an extension to the original idea - perhaps something I say will have meaning for another person...
    Liminalghost Liminalghost 36-40, M 11 Responses May 23, 2010

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    I am newly separated with a daughter

    who is just turning a year old. The separation was not my choice, but I am trying hard to accept the space we need. I never thought I'd be in this position in my life, especially after all the obstacles we've overcome, including infertility. I miss my best friend, husband, and...
    dirami39 dirami39 31-35, F 5 Responses Aug 8, 2014

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    How does one get over the separation of the

    other partner keeps inserting themselves into the others life?
    Newnina Newnina 36-40, F 1 Response Jun 14

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    I've been married for 23 years

    and have known for 18 of those years that my husband and I are better as friends. It's so extremely lonely!! We want the same things for our family, but out of a relationship we don't. I've felt so trapped. I've tried counseling, hobbies, outside interests to find contentment...
    Brookief Brookief 41-45, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    She Destroyed My Soul

    It's been about 45 hours since I found out. Exactly 4 days since the fuse was lit to the end of my life, as I know it. And now, I am newly, involuntarily, separated. Homeless, family-less, just less. The best years of my life are gone. I can't get those back to spend with...
    phatdog phatdog 36-40, M 3 Responses Dec 14, 2011

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    After an 8 year relationship

    and marriage with an alcoholic I have finally decided to move on. The freedom I feel is indescribable! There will definitely be an adjustment period for our two children...but I can be happy knowing that this is ultimately the best decision for all of us. Feeling free and...
    deleted deleted 26-30 11 Responses Apr 13

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    I am newly separated

    because i filed for divorce earlier this year. My soon to be ex and I agreed to the separation and subsequent divorce because of several differences beyond repair in our lives and marriage.
    familybeachparty familybeachparty 41-45, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    I am so beside myself.

    Right now. It took me an hour to get dressed this morning. I was crying so hard. I don't know how I am going to get through another day without the only person that I have ever loved. I just do not understand what I did so horrible to deserve to hurt so damn bad. I've been...
    a11wayson a11wayson 41-45, F 5 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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    'He Cheated, So Why Do I Feel Guilty?' Update

    Nearly six months now since separating after 24 years. After the initial feeling of devastation, I felt a sense of calm and happiness and wondered if that was just a phase, like some sort of mental coping mechanism. Well, I still feel genuinely happier! I think after so long...
    anewlifealone anewlifealone 46-50, F 4 Responses Aug 26, 2013

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    Life. It happens. And

    while we're fussing over the meaningless stuff, the real stuff is passing us by!!!
    justanotherbloke justanotherbloke 36-40, M 1 Response Nov 16, 2014

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    My wife moved out of the house yesterday

    after 19.5 years. I love her with all my heart but she said that there's a block in her mind when it comes to me (she knows she loves me but doesn't feel it) ever since the memories and details of her abuse came back. Started drinking regularly after the death of my father and...
    broalmight44 broalmight44 41-45, M 3 Responses May 24

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    Finally settled into my new place!

    It is cozy and comfy and especially with my dog at my side....I am excited and have pangs of loneliness but I am excited for this new start!
    MFeisty MFeisty 41-45, F 5 Responses Mar 1

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    Update after last night assault.

    Police have been fab. Still not sure if there's a case but giving a detailed statement ( took 6hrs) made me see my life through others eyes. Also they were able to challenge a lot if what he's told me for year. I've realised several things today; I am a victim of domestic...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 36-40, F 1 Response Apr 9, 2014

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    The most important thing I have learned from my

    long term relationship....This goes for anyone, relationship or not. ....if you're trying to make someone happy, set a limit and don't cheat yourself. We all want to hear our lovers say they'd do anything for us....it makes you feel safe, naturally as comfort overcomes us, we...
    BillyLovette BillyLovette 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 15

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    We have been through this before,

    my wife an I, a couple of years ago. We separated for 8 months. But soon my compassion for her feelings led me to reconcile with her. However, things haven't changed and here we are again. And although the situation is different, the reactions from her are still the same. I...
    drknght75 drknght75 36-40, M 2 Responses Jun 5

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    Tonight I filled out the financial declaration

    for our temporary hearing scheduled for next week. It amazes me how 28 years together can be broken down into mere figures on a page.
    BeachGypsy BeachGypsy 46-50, F 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    Sorry it is so around the place

    but I needed to vent a little SO about 3 weeks ago my fiance and I broke up. Reasons behind it she said that I was immature, financially unstable, and a brick wall to talk to I always tried to talk to her regardless of if I really wanted to or not. I gave her money when I had...
    dreamin20 dreamin20 22-25, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Much Better Now...

    It's been a while since my last post. My wife (er ex?) and I have been ignoring the whole divorce scenario, we both know it is going to happen. As of now, being separated is the BEST thing she and I have agreed on. So nice to come home (to my apartment) stress-free, no worries...
    xjoseph xjoseph 31-35, M 8 Responses May 23, 2012

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    It has been nearly 2 months.

    His temper became too much and I ended up trying to get a protection order when I had to step between him and my 14 year old son. This happened day after I had an epidural shot put on my back. I had a herniated disc and bad sciatica. But, he did not seem to care. He would not...
    newdays123 newdays123 41-45, F 1 Response May 31

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    After weeks of talking

    and not getting to the main issue as to why our marriage failed. Yesterday, we finally spoke really spoke. It was painful hearing that your not loved and haven't been for a long time. That all that time you had spent making things right was a waste. That your only really thought...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 4 Responses Jun 8, 2014

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    Quotes That Help Me To Move On...

    It's not what you go through that defines you; you can't always help that. It's what you do AFTER you've gone through it that really tests who you are. Kwame Floyd
    erfra7 erfra7 46-50, M Sep 7, 2013

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    My bf dumped me. We hv been on

    and off for 16 years, it's always I love him more. He always dumped me for new gals and even transmitted chlamydia to me. But I still love him, I still think he's a great person. I know that this time will be a real over between us. I'm devastated and hv insomnia. I can say that...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses May 8

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    I am newly separated

    and have 2 children. My daughter is 14 and is doing fine with the separation. My son is 12 and is not fine. Right now I just left my place to take a walk after my son does his best to be so fresh and talk back. We have a 9 month old puppy who can be nippy he gets do angry when...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    I tell everyone I'm fine,

    I'm doing great, I put on a smile and go about my day. But deep down inside I am falling apart. From time to time I even convince myself, but when I'm alone and have nothing to occupy my attention the pain becomes all to real. To point where I can feel myself sliding into a deep...
    starrman92 starrman92 41-45, M 5 Responses Jun 2

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    Why Did I Get Married On My Birthday ! Lol

    I am hittin 37 today and today would have also been my 13 year anniversary. This is my first anniversary without her and its been tough. Honestly I am looking forward to the day ending and trying to get back to normal. I just pray for strength, courage, and hope. Best of luck to...
    Sodapopcur Sodapopcur 36-40, M 3 Responses Oct 6, 2013

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    April 8th, 2015 - It's been 5 weeks

    and 2 days since we officially separated. He's still sleeping on the couch. How much time am I supposed to give him?? I just want it to be over already. I'm tired of looking at his sad, mopey face. I made every excuse for him. Oh but he's a good man, he's a nice person, he's...
    Germanovna Germanovna 31-35, F May 14

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    foresttrail foresttrail 41-45, M 1 Response Jun 16

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    My husband and I have recently separated.

    He just decided abruptly over day (last month). That is was over, he's tired of pretending. That he wasted 15 years and wanted me to leave. It crushed me... I could have faught. I didn't because I agreed. He is begging for me to come back. I won't, and to keep myself busy. I...
    theophaneia theophaneia 31-35, F 2 Responses May 8

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    He was charged! I am

    so shocked. If you've read my posts you'll no my police officer husband assaulted me in February and my daughter saw. That was the last straw and I asked him to leave. Since I've done everything to beg him to give us another chance to the point where him going put on a date with...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 27, 2014

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    I'm single and I'm happy .

    .... I do not want my ex back... at all!!!
    Serenita Serenita 41-45, F 6 Responses Sep 19, 2014

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    I Am 34 Years Old And Single Again After Being Married For 8 Years...

    this sounds odd... I often feel lost because now I am on my own, as before I was used to do "couples stuff". I find myself alone and not sure sometimes, we never had kids and for that I am thankful... I have already a history posted in the affair section here in the E.P which...
    devilwife devilwife 31-35, F 10 Responses Nov 26, 2012

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    I'm 17 years old . I have a one year old baby .

    My boyfriend of 4 years and I have just recently broke up. I feel so alone and unwanted . He has told me horrible things . But yet I still love him . I need help. Or motivation in life Bc I don't know where I'll end .
    jackiebustillo jackiebustillo 16-17, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    it's been 6 months and I'm devastated.

    together 8 years and just bought a house then I get kicked out and wasn't sure why. come to find out it was another guy. I put so much into our relationship and building our life together. now she has house, new guy lives there with my daughter, now I only get my daughter on...
    needbetter needbetter 31-35, M 5 Responses Jun 17

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    Flip flopping... After our long talk over the

    weekend. He's texting me from work and trying to get me to sleep in the bed with him again. I feel like I need to hurt him over and over to get him to see, what we both already agreed on. This is so, very hard. Roller coaster of a marriage for years and now a roller coaster of...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 4 Responses Jun 10, 2014

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    So today was the first day in accepting the

    change in my life. It's not something I have control over but I have the control from here on out! I don't have much social life and that's gonna take some time to fix. But the friends I do have are there for me. New stage in life.
    seanv14 seanv14 26-30, M 2 Responses Aug 7, 2014

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    I'm actually not separated yet.

    I'm about to initiate the process but I'm having so much difficulty dealing with the ramifications of this decision to leave my wife. It would be easier if we hated each other but we don't. In fact, she still loves me as she's always done. I've stopped loving her for a multitude...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses May 25

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