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I Am Newly Separated

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 4,481 People

    I've been separated for 10 months now.

    Been the longest time of my life! I feel lost and confused still. I know I wasn't happy, but at the same time I feel obligated to my family to work it out. My husband is someone who would always rather stay home and not get out and live. We treat each other terrible and argue a...
    Elle340 Elle340 31-35, F 4 Responses Aug 21, 2014

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    I recently separate from my husband.

    We've been married for four years and together for seven. I retired from the military and quit traveling to help him realize his dream. Two weeks ago his dream began to include another woman. I will not dwell on the amount of pain and heartache that comes with the infidelity...
    Selene73 Selene73 41-45, F 3 Responses Aug 23, 2015

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    My husband and I have recently separated.

    He just decided abruptly over day (last month). That is was over, he's tired of pretending. That he wasted 15 years and wanted me to leave. It crushed me... I could have faught. I didn't because I agreed. He is begging for me to come back. I won't, and to keep myself busy. I...
    theophaneia theophaneia 31-35, F 2 Responses May 8, 2015

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    My husband of 9 years confessed

    that he was "getting his needs met by someone else" 6 months ago. I had no idea and it completely turned my world upside down. He claimed that he wanted to work on the marriage so I (being a Christian woman) decided I wanted to make it work as well. About 4 months ago I found...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Sep 3, 2015

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    Newly Separated

    Im newly separated from my wife of 4 years and not by choice. I got into a car accident and she kept the insurance money. She left me to struggle to pay for school on my own without even a way to my job. All because I told her 6 months ago that i was sick of our life and wanted...
    LoneAlpha LoneAlpha 31-35, M 32 Responses Jul 1, 2012

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    After weeks of talking

    and not getting to the main issue as to why our marriage failed. Yesterday, we finally spoke really spoke. It was painful hearing that your not loved and haven't been for a long time. That all that time you had spent making things right was a waste. That your only really thought...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 4 Responses Jun 8, 2014

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    I have learned through the years,

    that life is too short to stay in a marriage that is unhealthy. First one, I was with a mental controller. Second one I have just left was with a person who has depression and anxiety. For four years, the meds were not being taken and the struggle of living with a person...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 27, 2015

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    I am going through hell.

    My ex was taken away to the police for domestic abuse.I had 7 years of it.He was so controlling and manipulative. After time in jail and on bail he was found not guilty.I cannot blame police for not doing it the job properly, but thats what happend in my case. My ex partner had...
    sunshone sunshone 26-30, F 4 Responses May 18, 2014

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    How do you do it? The conversation,

    I mean. I will probably be getting separated soon. Married for 13 years. Miserable for most of that time, but afraid I can't make it on my own. I probably can, but I've never had to (went from living at home to living with wife, who makes 3x as much as me). I'm also afraid that...
    Kareem840 Kareem840 36-40, M 2 Responses Jan 8

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    Much Better Now...

    It's been a while since my last post. My wife (er ex?) and I have been ignoring the whole divorce scenario, we both know it is going to happen. As of now, being separated is the BEST thing she and I have agreed on. So nice to come home (to my apartment) stress-free, no worries...
    xjoseph xjoseph 31-35, M 8 Responses May 23, 2012

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    She Destroyed My Soul

    It's been about 45 hours since I found out. Exactly 4 days since the fuse was lit to the end of my life, as I know it. And now, I am newly, involuntarily, separated. Homeless, family-less, just less. The best years of my life are gone. I can't get those back to spend with...
    phatdog phatdog 36-40, M 4 Responses Dec 14, 2011

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    I still find my ex sexy

    as hell. Do you end up sleeping with your ex again? I feel that it would only make things more messy, but it is hard to not want to when I find that person attractive and I had an emotional connection at some point.
    Nico2390 Nico2390 26-30, F 3 Responses Jan 8

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    Hi can any tell me is there any support groups

    out there for free as finances low been separated for 6 months now and still up set crying inside every day and feeling really really down and low can any one help me please .
    gjwood gjwood 36-40, M 2 Responses Jan 16

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    Heartbroken sad Let me start from the beginning

    I was in a abusive marriage for 9 years and I had enough and got out! I was a mum with 2 small kids and decided to try out a dating site and see what happens after awhile! I signed up and met a few males until I met the man of my dreams he was everything and more we got married...
    brokenhearted1976 brokenhearted1976 36-40, F 2 Responses Dec 16, 2015

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    I Am 34 Years Old And Single Again After Being Married For 8 Years...

    this sounds odd... I often feel lost because now I am on my own, as before I was used to do "couples stuff". I find myself alone and not sure sometimes, we never had kids and for that I am thankful... I have already a history posted in the affair section here in the E.P which...
    devilwife devilwife 31-35, F 10 Responses Nov 26, 2012

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    My Husband always had female friends to talk to.

    He had old ones, and new ones. I had an issue with him always talking to the other women. I asked him to end the new "talking" relationships. Long story short and 2 years later, he couldn't stop. I broke up with him in marriage counseling, 2 weeks after our 4 year wedding...
    chocolateeri chocolateeri 31-35, F 1 Response Oct 25, 2015

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    I am new to this so not sure

    where to start..my husband of 20 years (been togetherfor 25) told me 5 weeksago that he was leaving, he says he still loves me with all his heart and soul but he cant live with me anymore. We have had a shocking year he was injured at work in march and has only just gone back...
    kylieheartbroken kylieheartbroken 41-45, F 3 Responses Oct 19, 2015

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    It sucks to let go. I know I have to,

    but I really don't want to. I'm still 100 percent in love with this girl and picturing her with somebody else kills me inside. Fuuuuck :/
    jmarr12 jmarr12 18-21, M Dec 16, 2015

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    I'm new to this group,

    matter a fact this is my first time ever posting anything like this. I find myself to this group because I will often use Google and ask questions in regards to what I may be feeling that day or what I am experiencing in life at that moment. Currently, as I write this, I have an...
    jslewis82 jslewis82 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 28, 2015

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    Finally settled into my new place!

    It is cozy and comfy and especially with my dog at my side....I am excited and have pangs of loneliness but I am excited for this new start!
    MFeisty MFeisty 41-45, F 4 Responses Mar 1, 2015

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    After an 8 year relationship

    and marriage with an alcoholic I have finally decided to move on. The freedom I feel is indescribable! There will definitely be an adjustment period for our two children...but I can be happy knowing that this is ultimately the best decision for all of us. Feeling free and...
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Apr 13, 2015

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    I feel lost and confused.

    My husband just up and left 2 wks ago. Together for 16 years and never did I think this would ever happen. I did not even know we were not doing well as a couple. Yes we had ups and dwns. Yes we argued but what couple doesnt? I am still in a state of shock while he is planning...
    Neverthesamegirl Neverthesamegirl 31-35, F 3 Responses Nov 2, 2015

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    I've been married for 10 years.

    I found pictures of my husband having sex with someone else. I forgave him and tried to move on. He then went missing for 4 days and comes back saying he loves me and he can explain. I haven't let him back home. I feel pathetic saying it but I miss him even though we never talk...
    reena786 reena786 36-40, F 4 Responses Oct 26, 2015

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    After 33 years of marriage,

    my husband and I have separated. Our marriage had been over for a very long time, and I finally found the courage to leave him. It’s been about 2-½ weeks since he moved out. I am glad he is gone, and don’t miss him at all. I just don’t know what to do with myself at...
    sheltielady4 sheltielady4 46-50, F 7 Responses Dec 3, 2015

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    So today was the first day in accepting the

    change in my life. It's not something I have control over but I have the control from here on out! I don't have much social life and that's gonna take some time to fix. But the friends I do have are there for me. New stage in life.
    seanv14 seanv14 26-30, M 2 Responses Aug 7, 2014

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    I am new here as well

    and looking for a place to belong. Where do I start? It's been 6 weeks now since I've separated from my (ex)wife & children. We were married for 17 years and have 3 boys together. We've separated 4 times in the past (a few days, a week, a month) and each time I've swallowed my...
    Shockwave00 Shockwave00 41-45, M 3 Responses Dec 12, 2015

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    I am recently separated

    although this is not the first time... This time is by far the worst. I am searching everything trying to find answers. His facebook being one and I am beginning to wonder if he has had an affair with any woman on there. It gives me a sick feeling when I think about it. I...
    WastedShadedDaylight WastedShadedDaylight 31-35, F 6 Responses Jan 7

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    I am newly separated with a daughter

    who is just turning a year old. The separation was not my choice, but I am trying hard to accept the space we need. I never thought I'd be in this position in my life, especially after all the obstacles we've overcome, including infertility. I miss my best friend, husband, and...
    dirami39 dirami39 31-35, F 5 Responses Aug 8, 2014

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    He was charged! I am

    so shocked. If you've read my posts you'll no my police officer husband assaulted me in February and my daughter saw. That was the last straw and I asked him to leave. Since I've done everything to beg him to give us another chance to the point where him going put on a date with...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 27, 2014

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    After 15 years of being together

    and 11 and half years of marriage.....it's over. He says he loves me and wants us to be family but our relationship as husband and wife is over and he never wants to get back. It has been 4 months since he declared he wants to separate and it hurts cause I tried so hard in so...
    beingme36 beingme36 36-40, F 3 Responses Dec 27, 2015

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    Quotes That Help Me To Move On...

    It's not what you go through that defines you; you can't always help that. It's what you do AFTER you've gone through it that really tests who you are. Kwame Floyd
    erfra7 erfra7 46-50, M 1 Response Sep 7, 2013

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    Recently Seperated

    I have been with my husband since I was 18, together for 20years. He had an affair last year, but we worked through it, he promised never to hurt me like that again, so many promises made, recently found out he is still cheating with the same woman. He had stopped but started...
    Eeyore76 Eeyore76 36-40, F 5 Responses Nov 2, 2013

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    Why Did I Get Married On My Birthday ! Lol

    I am hittin 37 today and today would have also been my 13 year anniversary. This is my first anniversary without her and its been tough. Honestly I am looking forward to the day ending and trying to get back to normal. I just pray for strength, courage, and hope. Best of luck to...
    Sodapopcur Sodapopcur 36-40, M 3 Responses Oct 6, 2013

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    Been 8 months now, as time passes I see things

    with more clarity. Tonight during counseling I hinted that my wife was abusive, counselor confirmed. Kind of blows my mind. Wasn't like physical, all emotional. Withholding love, affection, intimacy. Isolating me from friends and family. Abuse comes in many different ways...
    HarryOsbourne HarryOsbourne 56-60, M 4 Responses Dec 1, 2015

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    Mrs began moving out.

    Has her new place. The house is super quiet without her and the children. Meals for one. Nothing will be moved from where I leave it. This will take some getting used to after 24 years together!
    grower629 grower629 51-55, M 4 Responses Oct 27, 2015

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    I've been separated for almost 4 months now.

    I never saw it coming. It was the shock of a lifetime, a cruel surprise. I thought everything was fine. Just two days before he left, I remember thinking I'd never been happier. Blindsided. Devastated. Crushed. Betrayed. Humiliated. Broken. The range of emotions I've...
    Ticia Ticia 26-30, F 1 Response May 21, 2015

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    I'm single and I'm happy .

    .... I do not want my ex back... at all!!!
    Serenita Serenita 41-45, F 5 Responses Sep 19, 2014

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    Not officially separated yet,

    but it appears it's headed in that direction. I reached out to her to talk because we've been silent towards one another for a week. She told me she doesn't have any more energy to give to try. It appears that we've been in a cycle (we're ok for a few months, and then when...
    virtualangst virtualangst 51-55, M 2 Responses Nov 25, 2015

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    Devastated still, after three months of him

    being gone crying every frigging day like it just happened yesterday. Married 23 yrs, I'm 46; we started this journey when I was 13. We have two 20 something yr olds. It's been a long road for us, details not necessary, but we've had our fair share of ups and downs. This...
    MsKita MsKita 46-50, F 5 Responses Oct 29, 2015

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    tommy71683 tommy71683 31-35, M 1 Response Dec 20, 2015

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    I met my husband at 14,

    started going out together at 15 . He was my first love and I have never been with anyone else. We married when I was 22 and he was 23. Fast forward 27 years later and 4 children and years of fighting and silence so we have decided to separate. Unfortunately we have to live in...
    Cody66 Cody66 46-50, F 3 Responses Nov 15, 2015

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    It is going to be okay.

    I thought I would be miserable, but I am actually okay. I laugh and cry everyday and it is normal to even do both in the same day! I did not know. Overall I believe in me. I may find Mr.Right and in the other hand I may become Ms.Singleforever. I could careless about the...
    2006Tina 2006Tina 31-35, F Nov 22, 2015

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    I am newly separated

    and have 2 children. My daughter is 14 and is doing fine with the separation. My son is 12 and is not fine. Right now I just left my place to take a walk after my son does his best to be so fresh and talk back. We have a 9 month old puppy who can be nippy he gets do angry when...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    Because my late wife died Sep 1 2015,

    after an op to remove a cancer tumour went wrong!
    Heartheocean Heartheocean 61-65, M 1 Response Dec 3, 2015

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