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I Am Not Who I Used to Be

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 5,563 People

    Pink and red hair. Piercings everywhere.

    Always getting into some sort of mischief and trying to strike someone's fancy ;) eventually, life forces you to grow up. All the tackle was removed from my face but I get to keep the select few piercings no one knows about. I think as I was forced to grow out of that...
    Luckylotus013 Luckylotus013 26-30, F Mar 13, 2014

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    acrehood acrehood 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 15, 2014

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    I like to think I'm not

    who I used to be, now I'm more tolerant, patient, bigger, stronger... I can go on and on. But I'll never stop changing, onwards and upwards, right?
    diegosauns diegosauns 18-21, M Nov 17, 2014

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    Today an old friend told me

    that I was a cheerful person, positive and enthusiast in friendship, around me the world were sunshine and happiness. I never thought someone could think of me that way, I don't even like myself back then.. :) and he wishes that he will see me like that again someday..
    defiantmisfit defiantmisfit 36-40, F 6 Responses Feb 24, 2014

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    I Feel Myselff Chanqinq.

    I Dontt Lauqh Thee Samee, Smilee Thee Samee, Orr Talkk Thee Samee Im Jstt Soo Triedd Of Everythinn ...
    conniee3 conniee3 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 4, 2014

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    I look back on who I was

    as a child. I loved the classic Disney princess movies. I grew up on The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Pocahontas, Cinderella. I loved making up my own adventures and dreaming of a handsome prince to save me. Going on adventures with my sister in our large back yard...
    xxdublifexx xxdublifexx 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 27

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    Who I Am Hates Who I've Been, Who I've Been Hates Who I Am

    I am not who I used to be. Is anyone though? Who here can still look at their life through the eyes of a child, where everything is interesting and everything is new. Where you can trust people, and being mean is your mom not letting you buy dunkaroos this time at a shopping trip...
    WeAllFallDown WeAllFallDown 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 13, 2012

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    So for the last year of my life I've crashed

    and burned and gone through hell and back again and back again and you get the point. Now I am slowly trying to get back up on my feet. All my problems were mental. It started with an eating disorder then went to anxiety then went to a phobia of going out in public then it went...
    GetYourFreakOn GetYourFreakOn 18-21, F Sep 25, 2014

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    I am rethinking everything I

    once thought about myself, it's devastating and riveting. Connections between my abuse, addictions, and assaults all seem so clear as I finally can see there intertwined aspect. It took 8 years but I feel like I'm stepping into a new stage and that I can finally see the past in...
    Peyton11 Peyton11 22-25, F Jan 1

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    Some nights, I feel as

    though I owe the world an apology. Whenever I think back on my past, I wish I could change who I was then. I have unintentionally hurt so many people. I get embarrassed thinking of how I acted, or reacted to certain situations. I'm not that exact person anymore, but I don't feel...
    LaDispute LaDispute 22-25 2 Responses Dec 14, 2014

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    All this time his colors were supposed to be

    transforming her All this time he was supposed to be guiding her And the tables began to turn around He sees the fire in her eyes Seeing that it is a new color she changed on her own He sees her wicked red wings stretching out Her eyes were forever to be fire Her dress was a...
    ghostbeautiy ghostbeautiy 13-15, F Nov 22, 2014

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    I don't even in the saying "people can change".

    ... Once you become a rapist your always going to be a rapist. Once you start beating on women, your always going to be beat up on women weather or not you get therapy or not. I look at people all the time when they say "my man or girl is not what he or she used to be"..... Once...
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 26

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    I am trying to figure out just

    who i am.. As a young girl i was shy.. But strong.. Took care of my family.. Lied to protect them.. But cried when bymyself.. Wishing for somebody to take care of me... I grew into a teenager.. Still shy but in my element spunky... Full of life.. Eager to be independant and go...
    sunpea sunpea 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 27, 2014

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    I'm really not. That innocent girl

    that I used to be was murdered the day I turned 9. I will never believe in the same stuff I use to, little did I know I would be changed forever that day. She was killed when I got home that day and I was never the same. I know what pain is despite my age and I know it effects...
    Frozensilence Frozensilence 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 15, 2013

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    Because Of You

    a heart alone a soul torn a dream gone hope turned to stone tears fall spirits droop energy sags thoughts stall courage arrives wisdom steers support comes ideas strive the heart beats the soul shines dreams form hope completes the day is new but I am not and yet I am because of...
    neuilly neuilly 61-65, F 2 Responses Sep 20, 2011

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    I sit and I listen to the words you speak to me

    out your mouth. The continue to break me down with every syllable. I look at you as though I don't know who you are anymore. You used to be my caring, loving husband who spoke nice things to me. Now it's all anger and yelling. You want me to want to spend time with you and...
    crafty36 crafty36 36-40, F 2 Responses Nov 23, 2014

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    My life was horrible I used to have a older

    profile onto here but I had to delete it because the more I had the same depressing thing the more darker and deeper I would go I used to think about blood guts and gore n **** like that but I don't I used to think that one day I would flip out onto everybody and kill or go...
    ghostbeautiy ghostbeautiy 13-15, F Nov 3, 2014

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    I'm stuck in this place.

    I don't know who I am anymore or what happen to the person I used to be. I think about who I used to be and I've realize I was only living a life pleasing others and my life was pretty much hidden away. I believe as we mature and get wiser there are stages in life and we learn...
    ADonya ADonya 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 23, 2014

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    Im Ntt Sadd Orr Depressedd Orr Anythinn,

    Btt Im Ntt Happyy Eitherr & Thtss Watss Reallyy Botherin Mee ...
    conniee3 conniee3 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 6, 2014

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    I remember days of the past

    where I was always thinking about how to have fun when off work or when I could enjoy beers or how I had to find a woman to take home and coulda cared less how I treated people . Now throughout my day conviction I areas where I fall short , how did I behave , how did I treat...
    pastormike pastormike 41-45, M 1 Response Mar 10, 2014

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    I'm Not The Same

    I'm not who I used to be. I'm different now. A better person actually. Use to... I would let people take advantage of me. I let people control me, and be mean to me and care about it. But not no more. I control myself, and I defend myself, and do as I wish. Use to... I was...
    magicianguy magicianguy 18-21, M Oct 9, 2013

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    allamericanloser allamericanloser 13-15, F 2 Responses May 30, 2014

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    Moved country when 14.

    Smoked a ton of weed (live in pnw, surrounded by stoners). Hate where I live, what I became and everyone I associate with daily. Don't want to talk to anyone, depressed, struggling with anxiety, in need of a new start and new understanding friends
    cjr54 cjr54 16-17, M 1 Response Dec 21, 2014

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    I am better. At what?

    EVERYTHING! j/k :)
    MyChemicalBreakup MyChemicalBreakup 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2014

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    I Feel Myselff Chanqinq.

    I Dontt Lauqh Thee Samee, Smilee Thee Samee, Orr Talkk Thee Samee Im Jstt Soo Triedd Of Everythinn .
    conniee3 conniee3 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 3, 2014

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    I Am Not Who I Used To Be.

    For years i lived in solitude, avoiding social contact because of my insecurities and miss-trust of people. I lived in my own little prison, afraid to let anyone get close to me because my childhood had left me feeling like i wasn't good enough and all the torment and anguish...
    DiesSomnium DiesSomnium 31-35 4 Responses Oct 11, 2011

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    Not By A Long Shot...

    ...I am better than I used to be!
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Mar 28, 2011

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    TheDemonsWithin TheDemonsWithin 13-15, M 2 Responses Mar 14

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    I Lied All the Time

    I used to lie all the time about the simplest things. Not because I was a liar but because I wanted to not only fit in but because I wanted to be better than anyone around me. I realize now that this came from a traumatic childhood school experience of being called names because...
    shaw8537 shaw8537 36-40, F 1 Response Sep 24, 2009

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    That moment when you're chopping food

    and you imagine how easy it world be to cut into yourself.
    MasqueradeMe MasqueradeMe 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 4, 2014

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    There's a really neat life changing experience

    in the living word of GOD . It states that has given us the things of life and godliness by knowledge of him that had called to glory and virtue . Virtue is the outward showings of the inward workings of God in us that bring about change . It also states that by this...
    pastormike pastormike 41-45, M 1 Response Feb 15, 2014

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    Doing things for myself,

    then my family is the biggest lesson ever. Learning delayed gratification is the real measure of character. Learning to sacrifice has been the source of my change with the enabling presence and power of God
    MrHeartaFire MrHeartaFire 41-45, M Mar 19

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    I used to be so happy with

    who I was, funny, confident, didn't have a care in the world. After my first love used me I was soo heartbroken I completely lost who I was. It was like I lost my soul, this was like when I was 14. I'm now 20 and I've built myself up, but I'm not the person who I used to be. I'm...
    littlefox6 littlefox6 18-21, F 4 Responses Feb 7, 2014

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    conniee3 conniee3 18-21, F Oct 5, 2014

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    I'm not who I used to be at all.

    Even recently. I was very wounded. Very hurt. Very shy. Very quiet. Very not myself. Very hurting. Very sad. Very lonely. Very alone. I've changed a lot. Went inside. Found myself. I don't even know who I am anymore, or what I can do, or what I will do. But I know this, I like...
    chimbie88 chimbie88 31-35, M Mar 16, 2014

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    I once was very kind hearted

    and open to a relationship........ When I turned.....I think i was 14 or 15....anyways, 9th grade, i discovered that I was attracted to men and not women. I was raised to be Christian and I truly did call it my faith at the time. I despised what I liked and tried to change...
    andrew24601 andrew24601 18-21, M 5 Responses Oct 16, 2014

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    I'm not sure if I actually like being alone

    or if I have just convinced myself that I am okay being alone.
    sunshine1221 sunshine1221 22-25, F May 18, 2014

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    Always Changeing

    i am not who i use to be, i changed, we all change. some change for better, some for worse, we're always changing, no matter what anyone else says, I just hope my changes are for better and not worse...
    wannaelectrodance wannaelectrodance 18-21, F 8 Responses Jan 16, 2013

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    conniee3 conniee3 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 1

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    Stronger?

    The past 6 years haven't been the greatest. I was dependant on other people, timid, quiet as a mouse, walked over and had no self-respect. I felt I didn't deserve happiness due to things I'd done or that I just simply couldn't be happy because I'd only end up ruining things for...
    LeaveAndTakeMeWithYou LeaveAndTakeMeWithYou 18-21, F 11 Responses Apr 26, 2009

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    From this day on, I will fix myself.

    Someone on here has shown me that there is good in the world. :) I will repay her back from becoming a better person and helping others like she helped me. All my negative posts in the past mean nothing to me now. (Deleted them)
    MysteryAbove MysteryAbove 70+ 1 Response Feb 25

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    I'm not the sweet little girl I used to be.

    I'm no longer the person that tried to earn love points pleasing others and changing in every situation to be what people wanted me to be. After years of dedication to knowing myself on a deeper level I have become more centered. I have self-respect and self-love. I don't do...
    Emilyleahywho Emilyleahywho 26-30, F Dec 30, 2014

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    Nobody ever is, as we experience different

    things, we grow and evolve into someone new.
    KinkyIntellectual KinkyIntellectual 31-35, M 1 Response Dec 11, 2014

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    2011 Changed Me

    I fell deeper into my addictions of choice last year: men, alcohol. My life completely spun out of control. I tried to deny the feelings and fear that I had towards the man I was dating. We tried going on vacation together and this is when I realized that stuffing my feelings...
    NeopolitanSkye NeopolitanSkye 36-40, F 5 Responses Feb 19, 2012

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    I Been Throuqh Alott So Iff Youu Thinkk I

    Changedd Yourr Probarlyy Riqhtt .
    conniee3 conniee3 18-21, F Mar 15

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    Seems Like I'm Not

    Deep down inside I know that I will always have certain traits and act a certain way, when faced with different situations, but I am stronger and happier than I was before and that is a huge change in its self. I grew tired of feeling like I did, who wants to feel like they don't...
    invisiblyreal invisiblyreal 18-21, F 1 Response May 10, 2012

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