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I Am Outwardly Positive I Struggle With Saddness

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 119 People

    I Should Feel Happy

    I am moving. This really isn't a big deal but I'm just going to miss it here. This is the first place i have felt like i have belonged. Its what i have been asking the gods for but i have a job to do. its obviously time for me to move on all my efforts to stay didn't work out...
    protectthebalance protectthebalance 16-17, F Feb 19, 2013

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    Can No One See My Sadness?

    its sad 2 think..evry1 who i have known dosnt really kno meh...they think im happy...but on the inside? im not....i only wish dat once....sum1 cud see past my mask and try 2 see meh...the real meh...i am a human being....i do get emotional...y cant i b allowed 2 cry? wenevr i cry...
    iluvnerds12 iluvnerds12 13-15, F 6 Responses Mar 8, 2011

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    They Think I'm Fine.

    All of my close friends and family and even my boyfriend think Im fine. I'm really not. I always feel so sad on the inside. Im on anti-depressents but sometimes they arent enough. Im still really sad. Im in therapy for many other reasons, but there are days where I feel so sad...
    cidcat89 cidcat89 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    It Has Become Second Nature....

    To always have a big smile on my face and to pretend that I am ok when in actual fact I am crumbling inside. I work with under 5's and so it comes with the job title, you have to be happy and positive. The children come first, there is no time for sadness. I am not allowed to be...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 1 Response Jun 5, 2011

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    Just Keep Smiling

    Its hard when its slips , if you talk to anyone I know they will tell you the same thing , Your Bubbly , Happy and ready to help anyone. I havent met anyone I can talk to .I dont want to bother anyone with it . I should be able to deal with it .
    Siri101 Siri101 18-21, F 3 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    My Struggle With Dysthymia

    I have always been 'the happy' girl. All my friends tell me that I'm 'a natural high', that I always cheer them up. I sort of pride myself in that fact. Yet, I feel very alone. I can be surrounded by friends and feel like a complete stranger. I get angry, sometimes, that the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 29, 2012

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    Holy Cow!

    There really is an EP forum for every possible condition. I'm usually much chattier but the group name says it all. Ijusthad2join
    ijustneed2talk ijustneed2talk 46-50, F 1 Response Jul 30, 2012

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    Maybe This Will Help..

    I have always been a "happy" person. i smile a lot and i like talking to people i guess. but lately i haven't even feel the desire to get out of bed....or answer my phone....i just feel lonely all the time. everyone always says "i know how you feel" or things will get better...
    secretlysad secretlysad 26-30, F Feb 1, 2012

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    My Whole Life I Have Done This

    its never got me too far- I am not one to push myself onto people or beg or skite or demand and bully I struggle with inner sadness and I hope the world changes so that the decent people win over the animals who are pushy and vulgar and bully. I let go of the evil people in...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals 36-40, F Apr 17, 2011

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    Life Is a Charade.

    Everything i do is geared towards keeping people from finding out about my depression. I decieve everyone i know; my friends, family and classmates because there is nothing they can do, and their concern will only make me feel worse. Largely i am successful in keeping it to...
    wardy131 wardy131 18-21, M 5 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    Is There Another Way?

          You know, many would say that radiating artificial positiveness while almost dying from misery inside is hypocrytical, but is it really? Does the world really need to see our depressive face? Do you really think you are goingt o, say, get hired somewhere if you come to...
    Angelfire0310 Angelfire0310 22-25, F Apr 3, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I can't nesserically explain where I started realizing how distorted my mind was with how I viewed my body. I was in the 6th grade when I began nit - picking at my body, started...
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    I an suffering from a illness can't be cured and it makes my body moving difficulty articulations are painfull my face can have red points my hair are falling down I feel like I...
    lyllou30 lyllou30 36-40, F 2 days ago

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    i was once a beautiful child everyone had so much expectations from me, that i will grow up to be a beautiful woman.. And like every little girl in this world i too wished to grow...
    shiningstar1997 shiningstar1997 18-21, F 5 Responses 3 days ago

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    do you ever just stand in front of the mirror and have no idea who your looking at? I used to be pretty happy about myself, take photos wear whatever I wanted. now I walk around in...
    stargirl1998 stargirl1998 16-17, F 5 days ago

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    I've known I was over weight my whole life. I'm 13 and about 217 pounds I used to be about 230 then I started eating less and I knew that wasn't the right way to do it but it...
    prisci3 prisci3 13-15, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    My appearance, my personality, and overall everything. I'm overly sensitive and lack emotion at an inconvenient time. I'm loud sometimes. I'm too quiet sometimes. I can't...
    CyanideY CyanideY 13-15, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I'm an endomorph..*the struggle is real* that's basically the bodytype where you gain fat easily or muscle... so that's a lose-lose situation if you just want to be 'that-skinny...
    Barbee95 Barbee95 18-21, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    My best friend keeps making jokes about how disgusting girls are who don't shave. I don't shave everyday or even every week, I only shave when I'm going out or going to be with...
    rainbro rainbro 18-21, F 7 Responses a week ago

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    It has been so hard to look at myself in the mirror and see gods mistake. So I try to ignore it, pretend that I have the female body that I feel I should have had. Every part of me...
    Kailey76 Kailey76 36-40, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    I can't stand myself sometimes, I feel like I dig myself into holes. What the hell is wrong with me? Am I not interesting enough? Is there something more interesting on your phone...
    DesiredUserNameandStuff DesiredUserNameandStuff 31-35, F 4 Responses Feb 5

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    I'm so very lucky. I'm blessed. I fell in love with someone who doesn't love me back. And that hurts. But he is also the most loving, protective person I know. He saw that I self...
    Thelostsoulslasthope Thelostsoulslasthope 13-15, F Feb 4

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    I have naturally big and slightly muscular thighs and I hate it... nowadays girls go to the gym to achieve that look...if my midriff was at least smaller , I could perhaps learn to...
    Barbee95 Barbee95 18-21, F 14 Responses Feb 4

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    Sometimes I wonder, "how can someone love me with all my stretch marks, scars, and freckles all over my body?"
    LaurenSenpai LaurenSenpai 16-17, F 11 Responses Feb 3

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    Fate whispers to the warrior, "you cannot withstand the storm". The warrior whispers back, "I am the storm".
    theflipside theflipside 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 2

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    i feel like people with anxiety/depression are left without a rope in terms of working society. It debilitates me in a way that i never knew the full scope of until now. Every job...
    Outoforbits Outoforbits 22-25, M Feb 2

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    It's been worse recently...but it has also gotten better (or less frequent anyway) but man when it hits...it nearly breaks me and I hate it. It's so difficult to try to struggle...
    PrincessAlora97 PrincessAlora97 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 2

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    I am currently dieting with my family, we are cutting certain carbs, breads and sweet. . . My two addictions are sugar and caffeine. The artificial sweeteners, just do not do...
    RebekahWriter13 RebekahWriter13 31-35, F 5 Responses Feb 1

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    I have a hump bigger than your house. The doctor said I need to go to swimming lessons and I'm terrified of water, and also, ill make exercise and become super strong and a...
    chaobredinthevil chaobredinthevil 31-35, T 3 Responses Jan 31

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    Where to begin...I don't believe I know exactly why I self loathe or self hate, I COULD hazard a guess but I don't like letting myself off the hook. I face up to things. Is it...
    followthewhiterabbit followthewhiterabbit 22-25, F Jan 30

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    guess it wasn't meant to be...from all the cards I could have lost...I lost my gym membership card, but that subway card which I've had for ages that shared the same slot with...
    Barbee95 Barbee95 18-21, F Jan 30

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    it doesn't bother me to see girls with skinnier legs than me...but guys with skinnier legs.. makes me go ballistic. .why must nature be so unkind to women...
    Barbee95 Barbee95 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 30

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    My Girlfriend had BPD. Over the past few months, her disorder has become increasingly more difficult. I have been fed up for at least a few weeks. I think being "stuck" together...
    hopefullyRD hopefullyRD 36-40, M 3 Responses Jan 30

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    I am addicted to PMO. It is a nasty habit and it is affecting my life. I am currently in bed, laying next to my beautiful wife and instead of sleeping or just snuggling her, I'm...
    RichieRoo5 RichieRoo5 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 30

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    I hate everything about my body. My eyes are too small and close together. My nose is too big and has a bump in the middle. My teeth are straight, but I have bad calcium deposits...
    xcherrypoopx xcherrypoopx 26-30, F Jan 28

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    Who has ever felt like they belong with no one except themselves for the rest of their life…I feel like Tht a lot
    SoccerKid9799 SoccerKid9799 16-17, M 1 Response Jan 28

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    i've been a member here for a while, but haven't got around to participate in posting. i am an aspiring filmmaker and after having internship-level experience shooting for other...
    kmcaulley kmcaulley 26-30, F Jan 28

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    There was recently a social experiment done by Tinder showing people's reactions to an overweight date. Apparently women are more accepting than men on this score but have a look...
    ctstranger ctstranger 41-45, F 1 Response Jan 26

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    I HATE that I am different when it comes to alcohol. Why can't I enjoy a glass or two of wine at dinner? Why can't I enjoy some beers watching football when EVERYONE else is...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 24

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    I have been home from college for about a month now and all I want is to go back. I was hoping coming home would make my sadness better. i thought being back with my family would...
    LittleMsGreenEyes LittleMsGreenEyes 18-21, F Jan 24

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    Hey...don't ignore this,just give me a chance to explain Don't grab your "tools" whenever you feel bad.Remind yourself what will happen if you give up.How are you going to deal...
    ghostdolly ghostdolly 13-15, F Jan 24

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