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I Am Outwardly Positive I Struggle With Saddness

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 123 People

    Life Is a Charade.

    Everything i do is geared towards keeping people from finding out about my depression. I decieve everyone i know; my friends, family and classmates because there is nothing they can do, and their concern will only make me feel worse. Largely i am successful in keeping it to...
    wardy131 wardy131 18-21, M 5 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    My Struggle With Dysthymia

    I have always been 'the happy' girl. All my friends tell me that I'm 'a natural high', that I always cheer them up. I sort of pride myself in that fact. Yet, I feel very alone. I can be surrounded by friends and feel like a complete stranger. I get angry, sometimes, that the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 29, 2012

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    Holy Cow!

    There really is an EP forum for every possible condition. I'm usually much chattier but the group name says it all. Ijusthad2join
    ijustneed2talk ijustneed2talk 41-45, F 1 Response Jul 30, 2012

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    Can No One See My Sadness?

    its sad 2 think..evry1 who i have known dosnt really kno meh...they think im happy...but on the inside? im not....i only wish dat once....sum1 cud see past my mask and try 2 see meh...the real meh...i am a human being....i do get emotional...y cant i b allowed 2 cry? wenevr i cry...
    iluvnerds12 iluvnerds12 13-15, F 6 Responses Mar 8, 2011

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    Maybe This Will Help..

    I have always been a "happy" person. i smile a lot and i like talking to people i guess. but lately i haven't even feel the desire to get out of bed....or answer my phone....i just feel lonely all the time. everyone always says "i know how you feel" or things will get better...
    secretlysad secretlysad 26-30, F Feb 1, 2012

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    Just Keep Smiling

    Its hard when its slips , if you talk to anyone I know they will tell you the same thing , Your Bubbly , Happy and ready to help anyone. I havent met anyone I can talk to .I dont want to bother anyone with it . I should be able to deal with it .
    Siri101 Siri101 18-21, F 3 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    It Has Become Second Nature....

    To always have a big smile on my face and to pretend that I am ok when in actual fact I am crumbling inside. I work with under 5's and so it comes with the job title, you have to be happy and positive. The children come first, there is no time for sadness. I am not allowed to be...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 1 Response Jun 5, 2011

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    Is There Another Way?

          You know, many would say that radiating artificial positiveness while almost dying from misery inside is hypocrytical, but is it really? Does the world really need to see our depressive face? Do you really think you are goingt o, say, get hired somewhere if you come to...
    Angelfire0310 Angelfire0310 22-25, F Apr 3, 2011

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    My Whole Life I Have Done This

    its never got me too far- I am not one to push myself onto people or beg or skite or demand and bully I struggle with inner sadness and I hope the world changes so that the decent people win over the animals who are pushy and vulgar and bully. I let go of the evil people in...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals 36-40, F Apr 17, 2011

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    I Should Feel Happy

    I am moving. This really isn't a big deal but I'm just going to miss it here. This is the first place i have felt like i have belonged. Its what i have been asking the gods for but i have a job to do. its obviously time for me to move on all my efforts to stay didn't work out...
    protectthebalance protectthebalance 16-17, F Feb 19, 2013

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    They Think I'm Fine.

    All of my close friends and family and even my boyfriend think Im fine. I'm really not. I always feel so sad on the inside. Im on anti-depressents but sometimes they arent enough. Im still really sad. Im in therapy for many other reasons, but there are days where I feel so sad...
    cidcat89 cidcat89 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    Actually I don't even know if I struggle with it anymore. I've come to accept it. I hate myself more than any human being I've ever known. I'm stupid, clumsy, awkward and ugly. I...
    4everlonelyalone 4everlonelyalone 31-35, F 3 Responses Apr 7

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    I'm not overweight or underweight, I'm just a little chubby. The thing with my school is all the guys are searching for that perfect fit and beautiful smart girl No body is...
    leftunloved leftunloved 13-15, F 9 Responses Apr 8

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    For many years I just do not know where to go ...everywhere I go I feel I'm rejected and persecuted and shunned by everyone .... I just do not know where to go ... At the moment I...
    restlessuk restlessuk 31-35, F 3 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I know it sounds pretty pathetic, but I do. Everything is a struggle, everything is hard for me. Because of where I live, the simplest things become problems, I think 7 times...
    ListenerTalker ListenerTalker 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 3

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    The hands of the clock echo a resonate roar...Tick Tock!My mind is always racing. My body in a sleepless state of shock.Physically it is that I am tossing and turning.Much empathy...
    Loverofpeace Loverofpeace 41-45, F 18 Responses Apr 3

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    Depression and anxiety has everything to do with realized or unrealized thoughts that attack the soul and paralyze a person into succumbing to fear and inaction. I struggle daily...
    liveurbestlifenow liveurbestlifenow 31-35, F Apr 5

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    I am 30 lbs overweight and I don't like the way my body looks. I am afraid of gaining weight and I look bloated in all my pictures. I want to get back to when I had my weight under...
    may4life may4life 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 22

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    I have a serious problem with cocaine, and I need to stop. Can any one share a story of recovery with me please..
    terriblefixations terriblefixations 22-25, F Mar 24

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    I am utterly disgusted with myself. I'm a teen that is 5'3 and weighs 140 lbs. I used to be much larger but managed to lose 15 lbs, getting to about 125. I gained a lot of it back...
    scoherron scoherron 16-17, F 8 Responses Mar 24

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    I have severe OCD, depression, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, and borderline personality disorder. I would rather have a deadly illness and be happy than...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 24

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    My belly is huge and my thighs are chubby. I feel so miserable about myself sometimes and my ex didnt help with that at all by even saying how unattractive i was.
    shazzarr shazzarr 18-21, F 11 Responses Mar 25

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    I think everyone on here can agree that we grew up in a generation where beauty is what people primarily hope for. It's almost like you've accomplished something if you're pretty...
    sullygirl611 sullygirl611 22-25, F 1 Response Mar 26

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    ugghhhh. I'm in Vegas. I really want to have a good time but I know I'm not skinny and can't pull off those cute little dresses. I'm nervous I'll look awful. and my friend whose...
    ktweav123 ktweav123 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 26

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    I'm back to wonder again what's the point of it all. We spend all our days working for money and our nights just finding ways to pass the time. Spend time with people who mean...
    alyssakayart alyssakayart 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 28

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    I have to go to the beach next week with two other extremely skinny girls and I know they are prettier. How can I feel more confident?
    scoherron scoherron 16-17, F 2 Responses Mar 29

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    I really worship my moms comments, because she is the only person I would ever change for if she says so. Since the Age of eleven I have been struggeling with Eating Disorders...
    k2611 k2611 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 31

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    When I landed in my mid twenties, which is currently now. I realized something was wrong after relationship after relationship failed due to what? I had no idea under I dated a...
    xNicholasX xNicholasX 26-30, M 2 Responses Mar 31

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    Mine are self harm, starving myself, and sex. Being a sex addict doesn't sound all that bad, and sometimes I can work with it, but I can be such a huge ***** and it's really...
    KittyCunt KittyCunt 18-21, F Mar 31

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    BMI says i'm on the verge of becoming unhealthy- 24.5 or what it was. Been unhealthy for a long time now, a year without much exercise and mostly sitting in class and stressing a...
    inbetwienerz inbetwienerz 16-17, F 5 Responses Apr 1

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    I am single after 3 years of being in a serious relationship. I am . . . Fat and ugly and I didn't think I would have guys wanna get with me. Till one day a guy I know from college...
    lilnekomeow lilnekomeow 18-21, F 7 Responses Apr 3

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    I've never been very religious. the only time I ever went to church was with friends. I've always believed in God but I'm starting to feel different. my life has always been chaos...
    ktbugg ktbugg 16-17, F Apr 5

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    I hate the body that I am stuck in. I am an emotional eater. I eat certain foods like peanut butter obessively. I want so much to lose weight so I don't let my thoughts everyday to...
    rm411 rm411 31-35, F 4 Responses Apr 6

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    I am anorexic and bulimic I have been sense I was 10 I am also clinically depressed have problems with drug and alcohol use and also have problems with self harm
    pinapls pinapls 13-15, F 6 Responses Apr 8

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    Just because I see myself as fat DOES NOT mean that all men see me that way. Honestly some men do, but because I'm always expecting the negative comments I rarely get offended. I'm...
    noodle425 noodle425 26-30, F 6 Responses Apr 9

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    I am fat. I cried when I got on the scale at a doctors appointment. I have never been this fat although I have been overweight for the majority of My life. I decided to restrict...
    icedrom779 icedrom779 31-35, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Black or White-"Some mother you are!" A stranger snapped at my mother years ago. "Bad enough you marry a White man. Then you teach your children to hate themselves!" The stranger...
    ShahirAnkara ShahirAnkara 22-25, M 3 days ago

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    i have been diaognised with bulime but now have tency owrds anxerixa not coping at all feell down
    earthquakegirl earthquakegirl 26-30, F 2 days ago

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    I have body and facial acne, stretch marks on my shoulders. Chest gets inflamed when i get stressed. I have every reason to hate myself.
    MyLifee99 MyLifee99 13-15 Mar 19

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    You still love him, there's nothing that can stop it. It never stops. It's killing you. Then you begin to kill you. The bad thoughts begin to arise and blood seeps from your wrists...
    mrswolverine mrswolverine 22-25, M Mar 21

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    I'm getting made fun of by some girls at my school because I used to self harm. They run away screaming, calling me a monster and what not. That makes me was to hurt even more, but...
    nlaJzy nlaJzy 13-15, F 4 Responses Mar 23

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    I'm 175cm weigh 55kilos trying to lose 5 to 10kg I hate I still look fucken big in barely normal weight I have to super skinny for me to look good.
    yesssicaaa yesssicaaa 18-21, F 6 Responses Mar 23

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