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I Am Outwardly Positive I Struggle With Saddness

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 119 People

    Life Is a Charade.

    Everything i do is geared towards keeping people from finding out about my depression. I decieve everyone i know; my friends, family and classmates because there is nothing they can do, and their concern will only make me feel worse. Largely i am successful in keeping it to...
    wardy131 wardy131 18-21, M 5 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    Is There Another Way?

          You know, many would say that radiating artificial positiveness while almost dying from misery inside is hypocrytical, but is it really? Does the world really need to see our depressive face? Do you really think you are goingt o, say, get hired somewhere if you come to...
    Angelfire0310 Angelfire0310 22-25, F Apr 3, 2011

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    I Should Feel Happy

    I am moving. This really isn't a big deal but I'm just going to miss it here. This is the first place i have felt like i have belonged. Its what i have been asking the gods for but i have a job to do. its obviously time for me to move on all my efforts to stay didn't work out...
    protectthebalance protectthebalance 16-17, F Feb 19, 2013

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    Holy Cow!

    There really is an EP forum for every possible condition. I'm usually much chattier but the group name says it all. Ijusthad2join
    ijustneed2talk ijustneed2talk 41-45, F 1 Response Jul 30, 2012

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    My Whole Life I Have Done This

    its never got me too far- I am not one to push myself onto people or beg or skite or demand and bully I struggle with inner sadness and I hope the world changes so that the decent people win over the animals who are pushy and vulgar and bully. I let go of the evil people in...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals 36-40, F Apr 17, 2011

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    Just Keep Smiling

    Its hard when its slips , if you talk to anyone I know they will tell you the same thing , Your Bubbly , Happy and ready to help anyone. I havent met anyone I can talk to .I dont want to bother anyone with it . I should be able to deal with it .
    Siri101 Siri101 18-21, F 3 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    Maybe This Will Help..

    I have always been a "happy" person. i smile a lot and i like talking to people i guess. but lately i haven't even feel the desire to get out of bed....or answer my phone....i just feel lonely all the time. everyone always says "i know how you feel" or things will get better...
    secretlysad secretlysad 26-30, F Feb 1, 2012

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    Can No One See My Sadness?

    its sad 2 think..evry1 who i have known dosnt really kno meh...they think im happy...but on the inside? im not....i only wish dat once....sum1 cud see past my mask and try 2 see meh...the real meh...i am a human being....i do get emotional...y cant i b allowed 2 cry? wenevr i cry...
    iluvnerds12 iluvnerds12 13-15, F 6 Responses Mar 8, 2011

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    They Think I'm Fine.

    All of my close friends and family and even my boyfriend think Im fine. I'm really not. I always feel so sad on the inside. Im on anti-depressents but sometimes they arent enough. Im still really sad. Im in therapy for many other reasons, but there are days where I feel so sad...
    cidcat89 cidcat89 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 5, 2009

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    My Struggle With Dysthymia

    I have always been 'the happy' girl. All my friends tell me that I'm 'a natural high', that I always cheer them up. I sort of pride myself in that fact. Yet, I feel very alone. I can be surrounded by friends and feel like a complete stranger. I get angry, sometimes, that the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 29, 2012

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    It Has Become Second Nature....

    To always have a big smile on my face and to pretend that I am ok when in actual fact I am crumbling inside. I work with under 5's and so it comes with the job title, you have to be happy and positive. The children come first, there is no time for sadness. I am not allowed to be...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 1 Response Jun 5, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I think today I finally realized I need to start being happy with myself and stop putting myself down so much, I've always suffered with confidence because of my appearance... it's...
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    I was doing ok on a weight loss programme I had maintained a 5lb loss over 3 months and was up and down over the summer holidays with day's out and drinking. I felt good and I felt...
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    I struggle with my image, honestly hate the way I look. I don't even know why I am like this. I hate every inch of my body. Its like an obsession to be thin or something.
    TheseBrokenSmiles TheseBrokenSmiles 16-17, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Whoever says that self-harm cannot be an addiction, I want to look them all in the eyes and tell them my story. 6 years on and off, after many times of trying and failing to quit...
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    I'm always in a struggle with my reflection. No matter how much weight I lose, I can't see any differences and my esteem is low.
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    I have a very addictive personality. I have had many struggles with drugs and alcohol and have always replaced addictions rather than recover. The first drug I took was ecstacy at...
    Facethedemons Facethedemons 22-25, F 4 days ago

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    I sit at a table with my girlfriends varying sizes ranging from 10-22 and it strikes me that the closest i have been to a size zero person was off the pages of a magazine . By...
    Strawberrygiggles Strawberrygiggles 41-45, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    I struggle with this every day. I hate looking at myself in the mirror, hate getting on the scale, I hate putting clothes on and feeling the tightness. I have struggled with my...
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses 5 days ago

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    I had surgery on my stomach last summer and I can't seem to lose the weight from being stuck in bed for months and I hate how I look in a bathing suit. I just wish for once I could...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response 5 days ago

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    during my school year id get comments on my body i know I'm not skinny and everything but they just make it worst. i don't tell my friends about how i feel cus i think they will...
    tati01 tati01 13-15, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    It's hard being a boy with a vagina
    loveyourself98 loveyourself98 16-17, T 5 Responses 6 days ago

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    I feel like a part of me knows that I am actually a good looking young lady, but there's an even bigger part of me that says "No, that's not true".I'm 5'5 and approximately 205lbs...
    SplendidChai SplendidChai 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    life is really tough for me right now. dont really want to be here any more. fed up with exsisting and dealing with ****, nothing goes right so there is no purpose to being here
    evolution2012 evolution2012 31-35, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    Not much of a struggle. I have it down pretty good. Nice to have a talent at something . Don't try this at home folks..I am a professional. Honestly tho I don't worry anymore...
    ArnoldJRimmer ArnoldJRimmer 46-50, M a week ago

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    Since I was a child, I've struggled with depression. I didn't know what it was until I was an adult and sought help from a psychiatrist. It took trial and error to find the right...
    suburbanmother suburbanmother 46-50 a week ago

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    i struggle with a K2/spice/legal high addiction. for around 2 years i use everyday. from waking up, to passing out, I would be totally out of it. I have no been clean for around 2...
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    I am a grey-homosexual guy (I am not sexually attracted to anyone but prefer to date my own gender as my biology reacts more to it) and I have always been body conscious. I have...
    senilej89 senilej89 26-30, M Aug 22

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    I try and I try so hard to get right with god and fix myself but no matter how hard I try and how motivated I may be to quite I just seem to fall into the same dark hole and...
    hinatahyuga809 hinatahyuga809 18-21, F 5 Responses Aug 21

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    I feel confident in my own body. I love the way I look, even if I'm not super skinny or model height. But as soon as I leave the bathroom all of this self confidence disappear and...
    Stanpines Stanpines 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 20

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    I'm on a business trip in another state and here I met my male colleague I haven't seen for 3 years. God he is so sexy in his confidence. Relaxed body moves, low deep voice and...
    AllyBad AllyBad 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 20

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    Everyone keeps telling me how 'gorgeous' and 'good looking' my boyfriend is and i know that i am butt ugly.. so now i am starting to question why he is with me at all? nobody ever...
    Friendship0nlyPlease Friendship0nlyPlease 22-25, F 9 Responses Aug 20

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    I feel ugly, unwanted and not good enough. I hate having to go through this because I judge myself way to much. I always compare myself to other girls that have a better butt than...
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    My name is John, I struggled with over 8 years and now I can proudly say that I am in recovery! Throughout the years I struggled I went to many different treatment centers and...
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    What's so ******* wrong with me that I WANT to cut myself AGAIN.
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    I hate it I feel so fat but when I go places the people that now me always say you've lost weight uhm no I've gained it.. Does anyone now how to get rid of it without exercising...
    ChevyGurl20 ChevyGurl20 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 18

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    only one part of my body I feel insecure about. just happens to be my most private of parts. I'm average sized (7") which I'm completely comfortable with, but I'm uncut and have a...
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