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I Am Rebuilding Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 244 People

    Today I attended two interviews to study

    History at the University of Cambridge. Three months or so ago I wouldn't have thought that I would have reached this day... but I have. I am trying to follow my dream, and am willing to fight for it. I want to prove all of the people who have hurt me that I AM worth something...
    magicmillie66 magicmillie66 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 11, 2013

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    Rebuilding

    I just got through the worst episode of mental illness I have ever had in my life (yes mental illness is real and, at least in my case, messed me up physically and emotionally). I'm rebuilding from here. I know it can be done. I dream of building a truly beautiful life out of...
    irah1234 irah1234 31-35, M 3 Responses Dec 14, 2012

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    The Puzzle

    I am actively rebuilding myself, it is something that I feel I need to do. I spend more time on it that I do on my coursework, which speaks volumes on my dedication to college. I find it much like building a puzzle without having all the pieces - you go in blind. But the more...
    Lullacus Lullacus 18-21, F May 29, 2013

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    Some new things. Before,

    I had mentioned in one of my earlier experiences about my lady friend possibly being pregnant. I'm a father to a beautiful little girl. Whom now is 4 months old. However, things between my lady friend and I aren't working out yet, I keep trying to stick it out hoping for the...
    SociallyAwkward1982 SociallyAwkward1982 31-35, M Mar 27

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    I Was Falling But I Never Began To Take Flight

    I've been destroyed by countless others over and over. My family is the second leading destructor of my life, I being the first. I've to become what they wanted but it never worked because in the end I could only be myself. The truth of it all was no one would except the true me...
    Mesroeman Mesroeman 18-21 May 26, 2013

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    Today was the last day of term

    before breaking up for the Christmas holidays. I have spent the past fifteen weeks of sixth form completely devoid of friends. My friends abandoned me when my boyfriend of two years left me in September and I became depressed. They said that I was 'being rude' by being withdrawn...
    magicmillie66 magicmillie66 18-21, F Dec 20, 2013

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    I will try to be the most depressed I can be

    so I can ignore ppl and get good marks so my dad would be happy
    Lonelyvamp2 Lonelyvamp2 13-15, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    Related Experiences

    I touch myself at least 4 times a day! I caress, kiss and suck my breast!
    expressingmyself expressingmyself 36-40, F 1 Response 4 hrs ago

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    I have to say I do it at least 4 times a day! At work I sometimes get so wet that I want to go into the bathroom or out to my car and pleasure myself!
    expressingmyself expressingmyself 36-40, F 6 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    I told you guys that I hated myself. Now I am in a messy circumstance and I felt everything was falling apart. I might not finish my degree on time when the financial stance is not...
    InFiDeL0020 InFiDeL0020 26-30, M Mar 24

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    It's been over half a year since I cut myself for the first time. I got home from school and had been stressed and as they say "when it rains, it's pouring". I got inside my...
    iSabishii iSabishii 18-21, F Mar 24

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    Here the past few days I've been dealing with a lot of insecurity and self esteem. I was talking with my best friend today and I think I have a really good idea of what I would...
    needinganescape needinganescape 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 1

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    ( Short story: Prologue) My last hope Everything stops. Times stands still. There he lies on the cold ground. Here I’m standing just staring down as death whispers on the end...
    TweDee TweDee 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 21

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    It took me a while to realize that somewhere along my path of life I actually managed to lose myself in reality. I lost old friends and gained new ones and realized I had changed...
    ariel2891 ariel2891 22-25, F 1 Response Mar 26

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    We're all here for the same reason right? We all hate ourselves. But I don't know if I actually hate myself or I just can't find anything about myself that I like. Or I think...
    caseylouise caseylouise 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 27

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    I do this as a way of figuring myself out. I love diving into the deepest depths of my innermost desires and thoughts, exploring myself and learning new things every day. I love to...
    JustAnotherHuman34 JustAnotherHuman34 18-21, M Mar 28

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    I started to really hate myself when I was about 9 or 10. I don't know why but as I was going through the day I realized all of the stupid things I do, how pathetic I am and I...
    skinnylittlewrists skinnylittlewrists 16-17, F 6 Responses Mar 31

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    I came to a realisation today that I have given up on myself. I have been putting on a brave front for the most part, but inside been struggling with inner turmoil. I was driving...
    NewDay NewDay 31-35, F 4 Responses Apr 2

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    I once read an interesting perspective about the people you will encounter in your life, it states: "25% of people you meet: will never like you; 25% of people you meet: won't...
    FussBox FussBox 26-30, F Apr 7

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    I wouldn't call it loving myself, but rather that I find myself to be one awesome, one of a kind person. I am intelligent, hard working, easy going, open, and honest, to name some...
    bkf2 bkf2 22-25, M Apr 12

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    I've only been on EP for three days, and it's already helping me with my ongoing battle with depression. Or rather, it's helping me to help myself. I'm the kind of person who...
    xeian xeian 26-30, F a week ago

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    My biggest problem right now is not knowing how to handle the most basic situations. I find myself stuck, unable to explain myself, or my feelings, throwing everything into a box...
    Mirabal19 Mirabal19 18-21, F a week ago

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    For the longest time I have invested my time thinking about my friends and family and whether I have upset them. Whether I said something wrong. Whether I offended them. Whether I...
    moorelove3168 moorelove3168 18-21 5 days ago

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    1. I feel bad (Can I allow myself to really feel it? Can I accept that what I really feel is horrible pain? Can I allow myself to feel it without trying to assume it can/should...
    dispossessed dispossessed 46-50, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    When I make a mistake, I hate myself, I get angry with myself & I want to hurt myself & punish myself!!! I feel worthless. I suffer from depression & social anxiety. I mentally...
    l2thedoublej l2thedoublej 26-30, F 4 Responses Mar 24

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    I've been trying to concentrate on things about myself I like rather than my flaws. It's so much harder than I thought it would be. I always catch myself comparing myself to other...
    daniefaye32346 daniefaye32346 13-15, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    Ever since this girl first walked into our school for the first time, I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I know I probably wasn't the only one gazing at her beauty. Through my...
    elugo123456789 elugo123456789 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 3

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    Ever since this girl first walked into our school for the first time, I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I know I probably wasn't the only one gazing at her beauty. Through my...
    elugo123456789 elugo123456789 18-21, M Apr 3

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    My birthday came and went without fanfare on Valentine's Day. Yes, I am a year older 57. While part of me feels young, my body still feels sluggish. I bought myself a new...
    bemyvalentine bemyvalentine 51-55, F 3 Responses Apr 4

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    Ever since this girl first walked into our school for the first time, I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I know I probably wasn't the only one gazing at her beauty. Through my...
    elugo123456789 elugo123456789 18-21, M Apr 4

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    Yeah, I am myself, 100% I'm the original G. So many goddam people always ask me how and why I change how I act and behave and stuff depending on where I am and who I am with...
    bluemetalchick9 bluemetalchick9 18-21, F 6 Responses Apr 5

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    Ever since this girl first walked into our school for the first time, I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I know I probably wasn't the only one gazing at her beauty. Through my...
    elugo123456789 elugo123456789 18-21, M 2 Responses Apr 6

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    I was so cruel to myself. Before...i let them paint those heavy weights on my confidence. Worse, i painted the world on my worth, slowly crushing any hope i had left. They kept...
    AndrogynousBeauty AndrogynousBeauty 22-25 Mar 21

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    I could write a 30,000 word prose of why I am depressed and why life has led me to the way I feel right now. But none of that really matters. It doesn't matter what life...
    Isabel13 Isabel13 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 22

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    I hate that I prefer being by myself. Occasionally I force myself to go out with people but most of the time they reek of negative vibes and are Debbie downers. I get sad when I'm...
    mayvalentine mayvalentine 18-21, F 4 Responses Mar 23

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    I find it incredibly difficult to open up to people, especially lately because everyone I've ever been close to has left. Now I just keep the majority of my thoughts and feelings...
    hollylynn91 hollylynn91 22-25, F Mar 26

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    I hate myself more often than before.. I hate myself because i could never do anything right. I hate myself for not being that strong person before. I hate myself for everything...
    Amature14 Amature14 13-15, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    I have always felt disgusted with myself even from a young age. In middle school to now (Highschool) It has increased dramatically. I hate everything from my weight to my hair...
    patches36 patches36 13-15, F 3 Responses Mar 27

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    Well yes I do like touching myself I just can't help it, it's comes naturally to me. I've pleasured myself as long as I can remember. I one great releaser for stress,anger or what...
    TandT0420 TandT0420 36-40, F 12 Responses Mar 28

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    It's so hard for me to love myself. I hate everything about my body, hair, and teeth. I always wear makeup because I am extremely insecure. I'm not that person who complains about...
    sabgonza sabgonza 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 1

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    It will be a struggle~ Nobody's perfect, we each have out flaws and features or traits we don't like about ourselves. I've come to terms with the fact that there is always going...
    lifesize lifesize 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 2

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    Tonight I went a liit further than normal. I wanted to full on abuse myself. I tied my ankles together and then I put a belt snug around my neck, sat on the floor and tied it to...
    innerself000 innerself000 18-21 Apr 4

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    Yeah, ironic that today is Sunday and later on I'll be in church and I am thinking this right now. But I've done terrible thing. I slept with my cousin. Since we grew apart, we...
    hazelnuts143 hazelnuts143 22-25, F Apr 6

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    I am pathetic. My emotions are consuming me. I just wanted to end it. Yet, the unsteady hand of the blade could not cut. As hard as i tried to move it closer to my pale flesh, the...
    NotTheOnlyOne23 NotTheOnlyOne23 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 9

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    I am hoping to find some relief in venting about my personal war on fat. I feel a bit narcissistic posting about vanity, but it goes deeper than my exterior appearance. My self...
    peacockskeleton peacockskeleton 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 11

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    I felt like **** today. Headache, cramps, back pain. Gained weight and so I feel crappy and bloated an yucky. Phone calls to the church so annoying, the people overall annoying. I...
    searchingfar searchingfar 22-25, F 3 days ago

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    My whole life I've had a close, tight-knit relationship with my parents. Family is really important to me, including both of my sisters. A lot of the views and beliefs I have today...
    odm3 odm3 18-21 1 Response 1 day ago

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    A little while ago, I opened up a package of push pins and a thought came into my mind. Why not just scratch myself with it? I kept scratching and scratching, and on one of the...
    haileybean89 haileybean89 13-15, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I accept myself as i am? I wonder sometimes,i tried to find things for myself,for to know myself better astrology,phyhology helped me a lot, experiences helped me a lot not all of...
    blackweirdcat blackweirdcat 46-50, F Mar 22

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    I'm an 18 year old girl and don't think I'm all cut out for relationships... now if you are about to comment and say "you're too young" or something Along those lines, then please...
    Dimples411 Dimples411 18-21, F Mar 22

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