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I Am Recovering From Self Mutilation

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 176 People

    I'm 6-ish weeks clean now,

    and it's pretty cool. I can wear shirts now! What a relief - it'll be Summer here soon. The fear of relapse is still always in the back of my head.
    Kneetar04 Kneetar04 18-21, F Nov 4, 2014

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    Just Me And My Story...

    It's been 2 and a half years since my last time cutting myself. Yes, I'm a recovering cutter. I tried other forms of self mutilation, like burning but it made me think too much of Hell to serve the purpose I wanted. My thing was a nice shiney new razor blade...slices like butter...
    kookoobananas52 kookoobananas52 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 18, 2011

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    My Scars...

    my scars are finally healing..for the past year or so i've covered most up with makeup trying not to have people notice but when they did find out that i had cut they wanted to see.... they want to see my scars but they are almost faded and i don't want to make more because i...
    zyx262524 zyx262524 18-21, F 1 Response May 14, 2013

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    The Road Half Travled

    recovery is hard for many people because the pain was addicting it leaves a constant ache or pull but for me it's a little different. I've heard so many people say i needed to punish myself or it provides release but for me pain has warped itself just enough that i know it's...
    scarsrundeep scarsrundeep 13-15, M Jul 22, 2012

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    Oh So Tempting

    Over time i've become severely depressed and anxious, as a result, i ended up pulling out my eyebrows and eyelashes (and yes, it is a form of self mutilation because of the pain and feeling of releasing pressure sensations that come with doing such a thing),  not with tweesers...
    Mishy17 Mishy17 16-17, F Jun 2, 2011

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    My Story

    I used to cut myself when i was angry, I dont have very many cuts, but i go to therapy because of this, one day, I went crazy, and I cut alot, on my wrists, all extremely shallow, like scrapes, and now, every times I look at my wrist i just hate it, heaps of people comment...
    shineaway12 shineaway12 13-15, F 2 Responses Mar 24, 2012

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    I was in a 4 year battle with myself.

    I self harmed as a way to release the pain and remind myself that I still have the ability to feel. Also because I hated myself and wanted to die constantly. I have struggled with severe anxiety since 7th grade and I'm now in 11th grade. I have nervous breakdowns pretty often...
    sydneyyumholtz sydneyyumholtz 18-21, F Apr 22, 2014

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    Bye Bye Blades..

    I've selfharmed for over 4 years .. I've bruised,scratched,burned,pulled hair, and the thing I've done the most and my "preference" is cutting.... Today my boyfriend told me how proud he was that i threw away my blades.. but thats not totally true.. i did throw them away but i...
    Megs11 Megs11 18-21 Aug 18, 2013

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    Struggling Not To Hurt Me

    I have been off and on cutting for 8 years. Wow that seems so long. Every time I try to stop eventually I just go back. The first time my mom found out, I was in 9th grade. The school counselor called home when she found a letter I wrote about downing a bottle of pills and just...
    forgottenxxmemories forgottenxxmemories 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 16, 2011

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    I guess I am the only male on here.

    I have scars on my wrists and arms, that are very visable, from cutting. I used to pick the scabs after cutting, thus the scars. I haven't done it in years, but I still carry a razor blade. I thought about cutting for the past couple of weeks, but haven't.
    marques30s marques30s 31-35, M Oct 30, 2014

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    I just threw away my blades last week.

    .. I felt really lost afterwards and only hope I can learn to live and cope with life without them. I have self-harmed for about 2 years on and off, and although I didn't do it for long, it became addicting so fast. The first time I tried to stay clean of cutting I began to burn...
    Neverthinenough Neverthinenough 16-17, F Mar 6, 2014

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    I have been battling depression

    for nine years now. Despite my efforts to hide my self injury, my parents eventually found out. It happened when I was at my friends house, figured changing into my hoodie for the night wouldnt show anything too bad. I was wrong. In that short few seconds of my left arm being...
    tayelizabeth tayelizabeth 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 22, 2014

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    Documentary: Self Harm

    Have you self-harmed and want to share your story? You will be paid for your time. Location: world wide Format: online video interview. If in Ontario Canada, an in-person interview can be arranged. All work is carried out in a compassionate and respectful manner. Inbox with...
    clajournalism clajournalism 22-25, F Oct 11, 2012

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    I Slipped

    Up the other day when I had gone almost a year w/out cutting or trying to. It's hard to do it these days when I know better and I have my son in my life. It was just a terrible rush of all the negatives in my life and I felt strongly like I had hit rock bottom and so I stood in...
    IMeWed IMeWed 26-30, F 2 Responses May 14, 2011

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    Hurts So Good..

    The only thing holding me back is the promise I made to myself. It's been 6 months, we've got to see how long I can go. Can I just make it to a year? At least... It's so hard. Especially in moments like these, where I reach out for a helping hand, only to see my hand is the only...
    WiltingBlossom WiltingBlossom 18-21, F 5 Responses May 25, 2011

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    Contemplating

    I have real abandonment issues. My father(my chief supporter most of the time)and my doctor are out of the country right now. I feel depressed and just want to sleep all the time. I have 2 and1//2 years without cutting. I just switched to overdosing which can still get me in...
    sparkles10 sparkles10 46-50 Oct 13, 2012

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    My Struggle

    Ive been struggling with self mutilation since elementary school. The first time i hurt myself is strangely easy to remember, there have been so many instances since then, they all blur together. What i do remember is being overwhelmingly upset, and alone. The first time i hurt...
    itallhitsthewall itallhitsthewall 22-25, F Mar 7, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    When I was institutionalized, that was my "wake-up call" that something had to change. I was tired of being tired. I was tired of trying to sleep all day to avoid the thoughts I...
    lonelyember lonelyember 18-21, F 6 hrs ago

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    I feel alone.Ive had loads of stress lately. Projects to turn in and stuff.Its weird. Last year was the worst time of my life. Bottom of the class and I had no friends.This year I...
    PYazmin PYazmin 13-15, F May 3

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    The pills help the anxiety, but the depression stays. i need something new and exiting.
    suddensouthmess suddensouthmess 18-21, M 2 Responses May 3

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    I'm.finally getting help for my mental illnesses and this week has been a crazy roller coaster I haven't went to school because I honestly can't handle it right now Im finally...
    neonpinkcupcakelover neonpinkcupcakelover 16-17, F May 13

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    I used to look at my double edged razor and see my best friend. I still would, I suppose, if I wasn't on a blood thinner for my heart. I have a wonderful supportive family and the...
    BionicCarole1985 BionicCarole1985 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    It's been several months since the last time I cut. But recently my depression has been getting worse and I don't know what to do. For the past week my urges to cut again have...
    MrMobos MrMobos 16-17, M 3 days ago

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    Just started counseling and I have to say that it's improving my mental state already. I'm not a monster and even though the things I've done haunt me I've learned that it...
    Niavati23 Niavati23 18-21, F May 6

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    Life has literally beaten me to a pulp
    00Broken00 00Broken00 18-21, F May 8

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    I haven't cut since September, 2014. I feel the urge rising again. The days and nights are getting longer and longer, lonelier and lonelier. I don't know how much longer I can deal...
    dontyouunderstand dontyouunderstand 18-21 May 17

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    I have clinical depression / anxiety was diagnosed April of 2015 I'm 5"3 and gained 37 pounds in now 230 .. I was admitted to the hospital in the beginning of April due to a...
    shirldb131 shirldb131 18-21, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

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    I must learn to say very little to my link worker or support worker at my supported housing ...as I 've learned that by telling her so much about myself and what I do I got myself...
    Powerlesss Powerlesss 31-35, F 54 mins ago

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    My drinking problem began when I was 16 years old, shortly after I placed my son up for adoption. .. I don't now if it was the guilt, or just apart of puberty, but I just became...
    KierstenJ671 KierstenJ671 22-25, F 7 Responses May 9

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    Self harming sucks. It's not fun, it's not beautiful, it's harmful and ugly. I almost relapsed today, it was really scary. I hate that I'm afraid to let myself go near sharp...
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell 16-17, T 2 Responses May 9

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    I was hospitalized twice this year, both times I was able to sneak in razor blades and other "sharps". It seems sometimes I really want to get better but other times I sabotage my...
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell 16-17, T 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    I went through my senior year strung out on heroin. I somehow managed to graduate high school. I hardly remember anything from that year other than I was constantly sick, and...
    DrumheadTrial DrumheadTrial 18-21, M May 5

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    I suffer from chronic pain and used that as an excuse to abuse painkillers. Before I knew it my life was filled with voids. Gaps that I don't remember. Gaps that scare me...
    CainMarko CainMarko 26-30, M May 8

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    Any recovering addicts here, opiates and heroin in general. I was real proud of myself cuz im about to be 2 years clean off heroin but then my insurance ended and im on...
    braster25 braster25 26-30, M 3 Responses May 9

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    20 months sober!My life is so insanely different that sometimes I have to stop and rest just to take it all in. 2015 so far has been about as spectacular as it could have been.I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 2 Responses May 11

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    I don't approve of women's self defense courses that are only 6, 8 or even 12 weeks because they don't give women what they need to be able to walk away from most situations where...
    grandpabear689 grandpabear689 56-60, M May 13

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    I recently turned 30, and I have self harming since 12 yrs of age, on and off. I've gone months to years without insistent. However, self harming s always there like a companion...
    Emmy508 Emmy508 26-30, F May 15

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    It doesn't matter how deep you cut, how much you cut or how long and often you burn! Self harm is self harm and it's not just people trying to attention seek. Whether you Cut...
    EricaAudrey22 EricaAudrey22 18-21, F 4 Responses May 19

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    My mother has borderline personality disorder. It's all or nothing, black or white to her. You have to give her attention and she is constantly taking and editing selfies. She is...
    angelique422 angelique422 22-25, F May 22

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    I struggle with self hate ....I do not like how I look ..I do not like how I talk ..I do not like anything about me and I feel very ashamed of myself ...I ve felt like this many...
    Powerlesss Powerlesss 31-35, F 23 hrs ago

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    Okay so listen up poptarts. There's kinda this thing where I'm sad a whole lot but don't want anyone to worry about me. In fact, I am only writing this because you need to know my...
    oopsoopspsosjxdsi oopsoopspsosjxdsi 13-15, F May 1

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    Even though it seems like I get lots of income each months but it is not really as I share some of my income with my mum ,orphans ,my lovebirds and other birds ..so lots of money...
    Powerlesss Powerlesss 31-35, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    My name is SexyBee1, my story is quite a tragedy, i got herpes from my boyfriend, i look for solution every were, but got none, i was depressed and devastated not knowing what to...
    sexybee1 sexybee1 31-35, F 5 hrs ago

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