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I Am Recovering From Self Mutilation

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 173 People

    Just Me And My Story...

    It's been 2 and a half years since my last time cutting myself. Yes, I'm a recovering cutter. I tried other forms of self mutilation, like burning but it made me think too much of Hell to serve the purpose I wanted. My thing was a nice shiney new razor blade...slices like butter...
    kookoobananas52 kookoobananas52 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 18, 2011

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    Hurts So Good..

    The only thing holding me back is the promise I made to myself. It's been 6 months, we've got to see how long I can go. Can I just make it to a year? At least... It's so hard. Especially in moments like these, where I reach out for a helping hand, only to see my hand is the only...
    WiltingBlossom WiltingBlossom 18-21, F 5 Responses May 25, 2011

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    Bye Bye Blades..

    I've selfharmed for over 4 years .. I've bruised,scratched,burned,pulled hair, and the thing I've done the most and my "preference" is cutting.... Today my boyfriend told me how proud he was that i threw away my blades.. but thats not totally true.. i did throw them away but i...
    Megs11 Megs11 16-17 Aug 18, 2013

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    I'm 6-ish weeks clean now,

    and it's pretty cool. I can wear shirts now! What a relief - it'll be Summer here soon. The fear of relapse is still always in the back of my head.
    Kneetar04 Kneetar04 18-21, F Nov 4, 2014

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    Documentary: Self Harm

    Have you self-harmed and want to share your story? You will be paid for your time. Location: world wide Format: online video interview. If in Ontario Canada, an in-person interview can be arranged. All work is carried out in a compassionate and respectful manner. Inbox with...
    clajournalism clajournalism 22-25, F Oct 11, 2012

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    Struggling Not To Hurt Me

    I have been off and on cutting for 8 years. Wow that seems so long. Every time I try to stop eventually I just go back. The first time my mom found out, I was in 9th grade. The school counselor called home when she found a letter I wrote about downing a bottle of pills and just...
    forgottenxxmemories forgottenxxmemories 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 16, 2011

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    Oh So Tempting

    Over time i've become severely depressed and anxious, as a result, i ended up pulling out my eyebrows and eyelashes (and yes, it is a form of self mutilation because of the pain and feeling of releasing pressure sensations that come with doing such a thing),  not with tweesers...
    Mishy17 Mishy17 16-17, F Jun 2, 2011

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    The Road Half Travled

    recovery is hard for many people because the pain was addicting it leaves a constant ache or pull but for me it's a little different. I've heard so many people say i needed to punish myself or it provides release but for me pain has warped itself just enough that i know it's...
    scarsrundeep scarsrundeep 13-15, M Jul 22, 2012

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    My Struggle

    Ive been struggling with self mutilation since elementary school. The first time i hurt myself is strangely easy to remember, there have been so many instances since then, they all blur together. What i do remember is being overwhelmingly upset, and alone. The first time i hurt...
    itallhitsthewall itallhitsthewall 22-25, F Mar 7, 2013

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    I was in a 4 year battle with myself.

    I self harmed as a way to release the pain and remind myself that I still have the ability to feel. Also because I hated myself and wanted to die constantly. I have struggled with severe anxiety since 7th grade and I'm now in 11th grade. I have nervous breakdowns pretty often...
    sydneyyumholtz sydneyyumholtz 16-17, F Apr 22, 2014

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    I just threw away my blades last week.

    .. I felt really lost afterwards and only hope I can learn to live and cope with life without them. I have self-harmed for about 2 years on and off, and although I didn't do it for long, it became addicting so fast. The first time I tried to stay clean of cutting I began to burn...
    Neverthinenough Neverthinenough 16-17, F Mar 6, 2014

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    I have been battling depression

    for nine years now. Despite my efforts to hide my self injury, my parents eventually found out. It happened when I was at my friends house, figured changing into my hoodie for the night wouldnt show anything too bad. I was wrong. In that short few seconds of my left arm being...
    tayelizabeth tayelizabeth 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 22, 2014

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    My Story

    I used to cut myself when i was angry, I dont have very many cuts, but i go to therapy because of this, one day, I went crazy, and I cut alot, on my wrists, all extremely shallow, like scrapes, and now, every times I look at my wrist i just hate it, heaps of people comment...
    shineaway12 shineaway12 13-15, F 2 Responses Mar 24, 2012

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    I Slipped

    Up the other day when I had gone almost a year w/out cutting or trying to. It's hard to do it these days when I know better and I have my son in my life. It was just a terrible rush of all the negatives in my life and I felt strongly like I had hit rock bottom and so I stood in...
    IMeWed IMeWed 26-30, F 2 Responses May 14, 2011

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    I guess I am the only male on here.

    I have scars on my wrists and arms, that are very visable, from cutting. I used to pick the scabs after cutting, thus the scars. I haven't done it in years, but I still carry a razor blade. I thought about cutting for the past couple of weeks, but haven't.
    marques30s marques30s 31-35, M Oct 30, 2014

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    My Scars...

    my scars are finally healing..for the past year or so i've covered most up with makeup trying not to have people notice but when they did find out that i had cut they wanted to see.... they want to see my scars but they are almost faded and i don't want to make more because i...
    zyx262524 zyx262524 18-21, F 1 Response May 14, 2013

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    Contemplating

    I have real abandonment issues. My father(my chief supporter most of the time)and my doctor are out of the country right now. I feel depressed and just want to sleep all the time. I have 2 and1//2 years without cutting. I just switched to overdosing which can still get me in...
    sparkles10 sparkles10 46-50 Oct 13, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    No one likes me. I have indeed let them down. The question is now, "Do I leave while they drown?" If I am already dead should I save the living? I am never not afraid. I am always...
    treegurl94 treegurl94 16-17, F Jan 1

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    Help? Im still recovering. I hate this. Its too difficult. Well he hasnt been talking to me for quite some time now. I have no choice but to leave him behind. He was so mean...
    amtired amtired 22-25 2 Responses Jan 6

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    I smile I laugh I enjoy the company of those around me They enjoy my mask For a while I live in a fools paradise Surrounded by those who love me My family One side heaven The other...
    srmc928 srmc928 16-17, F Dec 26, 2014

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    I used to hate feeling pain, I used to hate when i hurt myself by accident, but ive grown to love pain, i hurt myself almost everyday now... But my blades and all that **** just...
    TheFuckerFromHell TheFuckerFromHell 13-15 Jan 5

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    Why can't I cut any deeper. ****** little pocket knife. why can't I be a man and just do it??? :'(
    IDontEvenKnowAnymore1 IDontEvenKnowAnymore1 13-15, M 2 Responses Jan 11

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    I'm 15 and been fighting against depression and anxiety since I was 8 years old. I started hating myself when I stared going to school when I was 7 years old.
    buggalue00 buggalue00 13-15, F 2 Responses Jan 12

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    ...that just about sums it up.
    adianoeta adianoeta 26-30, F 7 Responses Jan 12

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    I try to stop, but every time I'm sad I want the only thing I know I shouldn't trust.
    losttay losttay 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 12

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    Sometimes I just run out of rooms and find a nice corner to have an anxiety or panic attack.
    Ritabird Ritabird 13-15, F Jan 13

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    I really need someone to talk to. I've been okay for a few weeks now but I'm having a really rough day today. Please, if you're a woman (it was a guy who did it and I just can't...
    dontknowmylife dontknowmylife 18-21, M 2 Responses Dec 26, 2014

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    I finally have ended a 3 year relationship that was slowly killing me. Being in love with a heroin addict was hard, and I want to stay away but I still have love there. It's...
    becks2378 becks2378 36-40, F Jan 8

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    I've had a depression 5 years ago while living in an european country... Life was rough on me on that time. I rebeled when I was 19 and left my father's home to find me some peace...
    Emdy Emdy 22-25, F Jan 15

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    I had been doing so well in recovery from self-harm for almost 5 years. And then a bomb was dropped. I found out that my little sister, who I went to inpatient treatment for (for...
    doggiemom90 doggiemom90 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 6

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    I have been three month clean from self harm feeling pretty good
    painfullyloving painfullyloving 16-17, F Dec 30, 2014

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    I just told by boyfriend I suffer from self hatred, he was so sad, I realised soneone actually cares. Yesterday I cut a J into my knee, my best friend cut an E into hers. Why the...
    Ashthewolf7601 Ashthewolf7601 13-15, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    A time before I was truly depressed, I was worried about depression. I thought I was happy, bubbly, I liked living. Those moments where I would stare in the bathroom mirror with an...
    BridieNM BridieNM 13-15, F Jan 1

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    I am a recovering self harm addict. It's been 7 months since I last self harmed, but even though it was only 4 cuts a relapse is still a relapse. It used to be really bad, but the...
    Ramellan Ramellan 22-25, M Dec 30, 2014

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    Bored can't sleep so why not post a selfie from the other day!!!
    megann08092012 megann08092012 22-25, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I am in recovery from addiction to drugs and alcohol. I started drinking and using as a teen, and it took many years before addiction caught up with me. It was a long and slow...
    bethanngirl bethanngirl 56-60, M 1 Response 44 mins ago

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    I've battled a lack of self confidence for most of my life. It goes up and down. Ever since I was a kid I've always felt not good enough. I would love to be up to have a whole lot...
    mattywheels25 mattywheels25 26-30, M 7 hrs ago

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    I love taking selfies and posting them, would you rather see me or my leather boots? I try to get my whole body in but they don't come out good!!
    Donna717 Donna717 36-40, F 7 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    depression is like a disease ,why'd it have to find me?I remember I used to be so happy, I used the love the way I looked but death of a person who was your everything kills...
    penguinproblems penguinproblems 18-21, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    I cut my self almost daily for about a year and half. I have finally been clean since late August, I have never felt so good in so long.
    jess965 jess965 13-15, F Jan 3

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    Modesty:From the Catholic catechism ...2521 Purity requires modesty, an integral part of temperance...From Dictionary.com ...mod-es-ty1. the quality of being modest; freedom from...
    MarkFree MarkFree 51-55, M 7 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Recently I've suffered depression from drinking two much Alcohol I've Been walking in the Streets Drunk almost getting hit by cars during the whole entire summer some from Lincoln...
    theinfo theinfo 22-25, M Dec 27, 2014

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    My environment created me. I wasn't always an alcoholic but when you grow up with an inconsiderate drunk for a father and a neurotic mother who always makes excuses for him, how...
    Alan132 Alan132 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 8

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    The Hammer Song "If I had a hammer, I'd hammer in the morning, I'd hammer in the evening all over this land, I'd hammer out danger, I'd hammer out a warning..., I'd hammer out love...
    Kate95350 Kate95350 61-65, F 1 Response Dec 30, 2014

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    *Trigger warnings are in the post* I started self-harming in early 2008. I stopped in late 2011. So four years. I was in highschool then, and finished highschool in 2012. I...
    Nomnomk Nomnomk 18-21, F Jan 4

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    16 Months Sober My life today is so so so different than day one of sobriety. At times it feels like I am living someone else’s life because there is just no way that this could...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    1:30am in the morning, here I am sat in a dark, silent house reflecting on my past, my regrets, my guilt and the ‘what I would have done differently’ scenarios. However...
    deathfromabove1066 deathfromabove1066 22-25, F 6 days ago

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