when some fool thinks you're being serious...
Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y ?
as demonstrated by me and Jake:
Me: uncovers shoulders
Jake: OH GOD SHOULDERS MY EYES BLEED MY EYES BLEED COVER THEM NOW AHHH I CANT UNSEE THAT!
We did that for a skit in English and everyone was dying😂
and let you think I'm dumb. Our I could open my mouth and prove it.
who understand when I'm being that way and give it to me right back. Quick wit is really sexy on anyone.
kill me with healthy food and less meat!!!
women can't live with them....O wait...I did that one already. *Braces self for the wrath*
so hard , I saw my brain.
the knife to my soup , the glitter to my sushi and the ketchup to my ice cream.
My point is you're worthless.
**** off " confused with " please continue ".
Girl: To see a movie?
Boy: No, to count the seats.
yours belong in the zoo
Don't be mad I will be there too
Not in the cage but laughing at you
heart disease and obesity runs in your family. It's that no one runs in your family.
instead of just getting offended...She's a keeper!
sarcasm is something everybody can enjoy.
But especially the ones who are smarter than you.
Person: No, i'm watering it so it'll grow in to a bus.
good shape at the gym. I'm like, "What are you doing here? You're done."
It's called the throne.
I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.
I'm still here. It's just that what you said was so ******* stupid that o think I slipped into a coma for a few minutes."
who keep having birthdays live a lot longer...
old son used scarcasm properly for the first time. The 4 year old isn't there yet, but give her time. She is my mini-me after all.
or do they get up early every morning and practice?
Well I don't like your stupid.
2) the wrong side
and I had to share it....some times even the heavens say **** you
because apparently, slapping the hell out of your co-workers is frowned upon by management.
. I've never been this old before ._.
well the background is I have been ******* trying from 5 months for this stupid internship, which would be useless because they are anyway not going to hire me, besides, this is the 8th time I am rejected because there are no spots open. Well, why would they be open, its not...
because it's illegal to kill them"
.. in a humorous way. I can usually tell who can take it and who can't. If they can't, that's when the fun begins. (Just kidding)
either me or those basketball season tickets" I told her it was easy...via a photo text of me at the game
that little whiny butt snot nosed kid blocked me for telling the truth!
that I don't put enough gas in my car when we go out to eat. So I went to a Gas Station and we ate snacks there. 2 birds with 1 stone. #GasStationDating
that's why you have 197 photos in an album called "ME".
than the speed of stupid!
and I won't give a **** next Wednesday either.
I'm serious, this facial expression does not mean I am stabbing you mentally. What? Me? Want to kill like everyone today? Nah, I'm just overjoyed to see you
I replied, "nope we **** in the corner"