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I Am Sarcastic

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 72,107 People

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    Great u think I'm sarcastic!

    Quietly in my Head...." yes its working "
    AJSandy AJSandy 31-35, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    My mom use to be against me dating this Latina

    chick. It all changed when she found out that this woman could fry chicken and turkey. I got rid of her on purpose and got me a white girl. Those were the days.
    DC313 DC313 26-30, M 5 Responses Aug 16

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    TEENAGERS, tired of being harassed by your

    stupid parents?!?!? ACT NOW! move out, get a job, and pay your own bills.
    Serendipitydoda Serendipitydoda 46-50, M 5 Responses Aug 5

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    I am sarcastic and proud :P who doesn't loves

    to have a special ability to insult idiots without them realizing :D
    beckygg beckygg 18-21, F 7 Responses Jul 4, 2014

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    Person: *washes car* Neighbour: Are you washing

    your car? Person: No, i'm watering it so it'll grow in to a bus.
    DreamingSouls DreamingSouls 13-15, F 7 Responses Oct 17, 2014

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    I'm not as sarcastic in real life

    as I am online, but that's only because I'm shy.
    PinksTheNewBlack PinksTheNewBlack 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 11

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    Lividstone Lividstone 16-17, M 2 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    When you wish upon a star,

    chances are it's a couple million light years away and the star is dead. Just like your dreams.
    FinnyFunny FinnyFunny 22-25, F 3 Responses Aug 21

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    padfootlives padfootlives 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 11

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    So can any one tell a real funny story I am

    have a really bad day ... 😐
    Yukinaru Yukinaru 22-25, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    And totally dig people

    who understand when I'm being that way and give it to me right back. Quick wit is really sexy on anyone.
    MissCocoGr MissCocoGr 31-35, F 13 Responses Feb 12

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    The end all be all to the "1 upper ppl" look.

    ..... I don't know what I got, but I'm 100% sure I got it & if u don't believe me just ask me. The End Fool!
    AJSandy AJSandy 31-35, M 6 days ago

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    my parting words with the ex wife;

    congratulations *****! you have managed once again to make me feel like a low life, worthless piece of **** once again! do you want some money for that too?!?!
    Serendipitydoda Serendipitydoda 46-50, M 11 Responses Aug 15

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    AtropinialTendencies AtropinialTendencies 26-30, M 5 Responses Aug 19

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    Some people say the glass is half full,

    some say it's half empty. I say "Are you gonna drink that?" *walks away*
    FinnyFunny FinnyFunny 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I love dumb girls. No,

    really! no I'm serious.
    luciousDK luciousDK 31-35, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    This woman complained

    that I don't put enough gas in my car when we go out to eat. So I went to a Gas Station and we ate snacks there. 2 birds with 1 stone. #GasStationDating
    DC313 DC313 26-30, M 11 Responses Aug 18

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    I have to use sarcasm at work,

    because apparently, slapping the hell out of your co-workers is frowned upon by management.
    HeyyMrsCarter HeyyMrsCarter 22-25, F 15 Responses Jul 9

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    HEY... (AS I POINT UP TO THE SKY) LOOK AT THAT

    DEAD BIRD!!!! U KNOW UR *** LOOKED UP.....
    AJSandy AJSandy 31-35, M 4 Responses Aug 22

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    hawkxxus hawkxxus 46-50, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    if you are alone and in the quest of looking

    for the meaning of life this short 30 seconds video shows you how https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxLFBkSSQN0
    Kyle178 Kyle178 22-25, M 6 days ago

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    ImAlivingParadox ImAlivingParadox 22-25, F May 18

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    Seriously, I'm fine. No,

    I'm serious, this facial expression does not mean I am stabbing you mentally. What? Me? Want to kill like everyone today? Nah, I'm just overjoyed to see you
    chasetheweirdo8 chasetheweirdo8 13-15, M 3 Responses Feb 19

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    Are some people actually born stupid,

    or do they get up early every morning and practice?
    deleted deleted 26-30 27 Responses Apr 25

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    Being Funny Is Great.

    But like my Great Grand Pappy said "Looks don't last forever. Dumazz!"
    AJSandy AJSandy 31-35, M 6 days ago

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    Sarcasm is a lost art.

    everyone assumes I'm mean, yet that's besides the point. sarcasm isn't mean it's just a way of interaction. you assume too much and get hurt from your own conclusion you're jumping to.
    HumbleMe HumbleMe 18-21, M 6 Responses Aug 16

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    I was so proud when on Thanksgiving my six year

    old son used scarcasm properly for the first time. The 4 year old isn't there yet, but give her time. She is my mini-me after all.
    painterchick painterchick 36-40, F 3 Responses Jul 22

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    It's who I am and I'm not gonna change it.

    Simple as that. I love sarcasm and if you can't handle it or respect that aspect of my humor, and then you can't respect me nor deserve my time
    waywardgirl98 waywardgirl98 16-17, F Aug 21

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    @ Neighbor's BBQ. This guy says " Are you ever

    not sarcastic or do you talk about anything serious.... I think not! Because your hiding your true emotions, on the fact that you don't know how to express them." So I got real upset & sad with tears almost in my eyes. I ask the guy if he could help me, if he might have some...
    AJSandy AJSandy 31-35, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    But I get really honest

    when I get drunk
    lostcause0foad lostcause0foad 36-40, M 3 Responses Aug 17

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    I forget that my sarcasm flys over the head of

    my 4yr old. Aint gonna stop though.
    Tileesi Tileesi 26-30, F 8 Responses Aug 22

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    LOL

    happinesswinsxx happinesswinsxx 46-50, F 13 Responses Jul 10, 2014

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    If I ever say "Oh wow" to you,

    it doesn't mean I'm impressed. It means you're stupid.
    littlefroghere littlefroghere 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 3

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    YouCantEscapeMyDemons YouCantEscapeMyDemons 13-15, M 10 Responses May 14

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    I find it wildly irritating

    when I see an invention as revolutionary as sarcasm being abused by total amateurs.
    RememberTomorrow RememberTomorrow 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 20

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    This is literally my personality xD I'm just

    so sarcastic about everything. my friends generally say they don't know whether I'm being sarcastic or telling the truth. I guess they'll never know;) It's probably the only way I can properly deal with negativity.
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses May 28

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    My friend asked me if I had a bathroom,

    I replied, "nope we **** in the corner"
    suicideDepression suicideDepression 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 18, 2014

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    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Aug 13

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    sarcasm, I have to use it.

    because punching people in the face is still illegal...
    Serendipitydoda Serendipitydoda 46-50, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Don't you just hate it

    when some fool thinks you're being serious...
    Calsi704 Calsi704 22-25, F 7 Responses Jul 2

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    Yes, I know there's a special place in hell

    for me. It's called the throne.
    FinnyFunny FinnyFunny 22-25, F 6 Responses Jun 4

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    Only sarcastic people will have these feels.

    I'm sarcastic, 99.9% of the time, but in that 0.1% where I'm not being my normal sarcastic self, everyone assumes I'm being sarcastic and no one will take what I say seriously!! Like c'mon guys wake the **** up!
    TinkerbellTia TinkerbellTia 18-21, F 8 Responses Aug 13

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    "Some people are alive simply

    because it's illegal to kill them"
    moonblaze moonblaze 22-25, F 13 Responses Sep 15, 2014

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    Boy: Want to go to the cinema?

    Girl: To see a movie? Boy: No, to count the seats.
    DreamingSouls DreamingSouls 13-15, F 10 Responses Sep 1, 2014

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    NOTHING travels faster

    than the speed of stupid!
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Apr 27

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