because apparently, slapping the hell out of your co-workers is frowned upon by management.
suffered from insanity. I replied No, we all seem to enjoy it.
but my fucket list is a mile long.
to have fun.
You don't need running shoes to run but it fucken helps.
tubes of hemorrhoid cream?
I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.
I'm just gonna sit down like it's warm.
probably shouldn't do this" to "**** it, let's see what happens."
encouragement. I feel like saying "Shut up I know I can do it, I just don't want to."
I'm all peace, love and go **** yourself.
that could have been wine.
or do they get up early every morning and practice?
because thou has ****** up before too.
...notice how all women's problems start with Men
who understand when I'm being that way and give it to me right back. Quick wit is really sexy on anyone.
after sex, you don't deserve a sandwich.
and I had to share it....some times even the heavens say **** you
Like break your ****** neck.
and it could be taken in a couple different ways, always go with sarcasm. Your chances of being wrong are incredibly low.
your man, just smile really big and ask "Notice anything different?"
I touch myself"... which translates to I rub my temples, because you give me a fukcing migraine.
that's why you have 197 photos in an album called "ME".
.. Books Before Boys Because Boys Bring Babies
because it's illegal to kill them"
It's called the throne.
and problems to feel better about mine.
I automatically think "So take off all your clothes."
Person: No, i'm watering it so it'll grow in to a bus.
So you don't like my attitude blame yourself!
I'm serious, this facial expression does not mean I am stabbing you mentally. What? Me? Want to kill like everyone today? Nah, I'm just overjoyed to see you
"I'm so ******* wet, give it to me now!"
She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella.
Especially frozen into cubes and completely surrounded by vodka.
*the demon possessing my body blushes*