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I Am Sarcastic

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 68,832 People

    This is literally my personality xD I'm just

    so sarcastic about everything. my friends generally say they don't know whether I'm being sarcastic or telling the truth. I guess they'll never know;) It's probably the only way I can properly deal with negativity.
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses May 28

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    everyone faces the life in own way.

    I face my insecurity with sarcasm, it's a sort of barrier. Everyone has own
    Enjoyyourlife Enjoyyourlife 26-30, M 3 Responses May 26

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    Sarcasm is needed when: 1.

    People point at their wrist and ask what the time is. It's not as if I point at my crotch and ask where the toilet is. 2. People say, "oh, you just want to have your cake and eat it, too" - well, obviously! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 3. People say, "can I ask you a...
    ThatAwkwardPanda ThatAwkwardPanda 13-15 6 Responses Jun 15, 2014

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    Extremely Its like a second language to me,

    one that I am very fluent in I dont know why I just am *shrugs*
    ireallylovetacos ireallylovetacos 26-30, F 4 Responses May 28

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    And totally dig people

    who understand when I'm being that way and give it to me right back. Quick wit is really sexy on anyone.
    MissCocoGr MissCocoGr 31-35, F 13 Responses Feb 12

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    Why do people feel the need to show you how

    witty they can be? I think it's about timing, not just about content
    positivevibes23 positivevibes23 36-40, M 5 Responses Jun 12

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    Especially when people try to insult me by

    calling me fat. "Really? I'm fat? I had no idea! Is THAT why I can't see my feet when I look down? I'm SO glad you told me. I never would've know I was fat without your help."
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    megamd megamd 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 24, 2014

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    TheCunylinguist TheCunylinguist 41-45, F 4 Responses Oct 4, 2014

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    paulsmith345 paulsmith345 16-17, M 2 days ago

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    NOTHING travels faster

    than the speed of stupid!
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Apr 27

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    There's a time to be sarcastic ,

    you have to know when to use it and when to hold your fire .
    Godofblackclouds Godofblackclouds 18-21, M 2 Responses Jun 13

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    reeessa reeessa 16-17, F 5 Responses Mar 6

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    Boy: Want to go to the cinema?

    Girl: To see a movie? Boy: No, to count the seats.
    DreamingSouls DreamingSouls 13-15, F 10 Responses Sep 1, 2014

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    my sarcasm level is so freaking high.

    like I go 0-100 real quick with my sarcasm. if you don't understand sarcasm, we can't be friends because I am the most sarcastic person you will ever meet.
    allthelove allthelove 13-15, F 6 Responses Jun 19

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    sarcasm literally comes to me naturally

    and I could be talking to someone in a serious conversation and **** and say a sarcastic remark and they actually get hurt and I'm like sTAHP I WAS JOKING. but once I was with my friend and she was talking about how she failed a test and her parents were gonna be pissed and I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Jun 9

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    was as big a smart assas anyone could tolerate

    I'm sure. there was a one liner in every situation. you had to pay attention or it would sail right over or **** you off. and I got a lot of him in me and loving it. people can be too sensitive sometimes and if I see that I'm on it. Till you laugh or punch me. ..thanks dad
    Kentex Kentex 56-60, M Jun 5

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    yrnjojo yrnjojo 16-17, M 3 Responses Jun 5

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    I wrote a paper for English at 2am the other

    day. the next afternoon I read it and realized it sounds sarcastic as ****.... whoops
    messedupmemories messedupmemories 13-15, T 2 Responses Jun 2

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    No, I don't want to cut your toenails right now.

    I want your *** in bed. It's almost midnight
    Gwall1234 Gwall1234 36-40, F Jun 21

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    I use sarcasm because flat out telling you

    that you're a ******* moron is considered inappropriate and is frowned upon and i was raised better than that
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Aug 27, 2014

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    Person: *washes car* Neighbour: Are you washing

    your car? Person: No, i'm watering it so it'll grow in to a bus.
    DreamingSouls DreamingSouls 13-15, F 7 Responses Oct 17, 2014

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    I like joking with people.

    Saying, "NO THAT FOOD WAS AWFUL" or "THAT WAS THE LAMEST SLEEPOVER EVER" and my most famous quote: "If I'm ever mean to my friends, I'm most likely joking." The MOST LIKELY part seems to stick out like a black cat in snow or something! And once this girl thought I actually...
    neonsweaters neonsweaters 13-15, F 2 Responses Jun 11

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    I make a joke and then make this really serious

    face afterwards, and my friends find it so strange and funny. I don't even do the face on purpose :P
    xcrownlessx xcrownlessx 16-17, F 2 Responses Jun 11

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    No matter how smart you think you are,

    sarcasm is something everybody can enjoy. But especially the ones who are smarter than you.
    Angelcum Angelcum 18-21, F 23 Responses Feb 20

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    If I ever say "Oh wow" to you,

    it doesn't mean I'm impressed. It means you're stupid.
    littlefroghere littlefroghere 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 3

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    I can be so sarcastic sometimes

    that people don't know how to take me , like if I'm being serious or not . I'm never usually serious
    dezi1124 dezi1124 16-17, F 4 Responses Jun 11

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    That moment when I'm being sarcastic

    and my friends take it seriously and ignore me for the rest of the week :/
    HermioneRiddle HermioneRiddle 13-15, F 3 Responses May 29

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    I'm sorry, but unless you are using magical

    powers an get it on camera you should not have a 5 minutes snapchat story...your life is not that interesting btw this isnt all sarcasm, but I had nothing to put this under
    NightWriter216 NightWriter216 16-17, M 2 Responses Jun 18

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    People say: "oh you're my everything.

    " "You're all I need." "I couldn't live without you." In school they taught me that i couldn't live without: Shelter. Water. Food. Oxygen. Ect. My text book never mentioned that guy I liked in 6th period. I'm pretty sure you can still survive without having someone "love" you...
    BrokenInnocence BrokenInnocence 13-15, F 10 Responses Jan 10

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    I have a problem... At the movement my husband

    and I sleep in seperate beds (medical reasons) and I went in his room he is staying to make his bed (just general housework).. It really smelled bad-like a person who doesn't bath enough! He has a job, goes out to work each day, I'm trying to fit the housework in my busy day...
    thatangie thatangie 31-35, F 4 Responses Jun 2

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    I am sarcastic and proud :P who doesn't loves

    to have a special ability to insult idiots without them realizing :D
    beckygg beckygg 18-21, F 7 Responses Jul 4, 2014

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    Once I asked dat s'lut like " I love your

    outfit, did it come with a pole? "
    FinnyFunny FinnyFunny 22-25, F 4 Responses Jun 3

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    I was looking at face book

    and could not help notice that one of the more advertised and apparent journeys to being a successful black mother and career women starts with being a white chick-
    Cr8N Cr8N 31-35, M 1 Response Jun 20

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    Thankfully women don't make up things in their

    heads that don't exist and get mad over it. That would be awkward.
    IDCFUKK IDCFUKK 18-21, M 8 Responses Feb 26

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    Yes, I know there's a special place in hell

    for me. It's called the throne.
    FinnyFunny FinnyFunny 22-25, F 7 Responses Jun 4

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    My friend asked me if I had a bathroom,

    I replied, "nope we **** in the corner"
    suicideDepression suicideDepression 13-15, M 1 Response Aug 18, 2014

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    "Some people are alive simply

    because it's illegal to kill them"
    moonblaze moonblaze 22-25, F 13 Responses Sep 15, 2014

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    Lividstone Lividstone 16-17, M 2 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    Seriously, I'm fine. No,

    I'm serious, this facial expression does not mean I am stabbing you mentally. What? Me? Want to kill like everyone today? Nah, I'm just overjoyed to see you
    chasetheweirdo8 chasetheweirdo8 13-15, M 3 Responses Feb 19

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    About an hour until my dentist appointment.

    I love that hell hole. I mean, it scares the **** out of me, drains my self confidence (the spoonful that I have) and makes me utterly vulnerable to whatever my mum wants the demons to do to me, but, hey... this is going to be ******* amazing!!! #FuckingTerrified. 😆😖
    Jaybird17 Jaybird17 16-17, F 5 days ago

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    Often when we are out my best friend has to

    inform people I've just met not to believe half of what I say.
    Kaisa22 Kaisa22 26-30, F 7 Responses Jun 21

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    LOL

    happinesswinsxx happinesswinsxx 46-50, F 13 Responses Jul 10, 2014

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    RedHwaiting RedHwaiting 18-21, F May 18

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    Oh, I'm sorry I washed your TITANIUM scissors

    in the dish washer. Maybe next time it'll be your Mac book. Then we can argue. Stfu.
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Aug 21, 2014

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    Are some people actually born stupid,

    or do they get up early every morning and practice?
    deleted deleted 26-30 27 Responses Apr 25

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    I love sarcasm! My friends often can't tell

    if I'm serious or not. It's probably because I make sarcastic comments and jokes with a straight (and sometimes bored) face.
    nitroxy nitroxy 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 21