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I Am Scared of Being Happy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 55 People

    Does This Make Any Sense, Not to Me.

    As much as I hate being miserable, being happy scares the shat out of me.  If I'm miserable, I don't have further to fall.   But most of the time when I'm happy, it's taken away from me.  So, I struggle to be contented and put on the best happy facade I can...
    BlasphemousAngel BlasphemousAngel 31-35, M 1 Response May 17, 2009

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    I'm not scared of being happy- I just feel

    guilty being happy when the people I care about are so sad.
    TaliaRice TaliaRice 18-21, F Dec 14, 2014

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    I Don't Deserve It

    I'm not writing this for anyone's pity, I'm writing it because it's simply the truth. Even though I want to be happy, GENUINELY happy, every time I get close to feeling so, I get plagued with memories of how I've caused my loved ones so much pain with all of the stupid things I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Mar 25, 2012

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    what goes up must come down.

    the higher you get the harder the fall. and that terrifies me.
    bonedecay bonedecay 16-17, F Aug 11, 2014

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    I Used To Love Flying Kites.

    It seems the more i look forward to something, the more i have to worry about it not happening. Whenever i get excited for something, i feel guilty about being happy, i havent done anything to feel guilty about though. i noticed it when the other day, i thought about how i...
    Dandelion11 Dandelion11 16-17, F 1 Response Feb 22, 2010

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    I'm scared of dying. I'm scared that it'll be nothing, just a big black forever. I'm scared that I'll stop existing, that I'll be nothing, that I can't think, or feel, or love...
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    Left alone to figure out life at 13. Used and abused up until now. Lonely. Sad. Frustrated. Hopeless. I just want to be in a happy relationship. I have BPD and other social...
    Saphhy195 Saphhy195 18-21, F 3 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I want to be tied up my x wife said she will do it to me if that's what I want. I do want it but am scared that she will do it and not let me go
    dickyboy13 dickyboy13 46-50, M 10 hrs ago

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    earlier there was a spider (it was bigger than a quarter) in the shower, naturally I got out of the shower, put a towel on, and ran out of the bathroom. all my dad did was tell me...
    anonymus000 anonymus000 16-17, F 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I met someone very nice on EP but I couldn't hold it together because I was scared. He was patient with me great to me but he just got too close to quick. I hope maybe he will...
    oneredsock oneredsock 18-21, F 3 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    MY HEART, SOUL AND EYESBy Message GuyHappy birthday!Adored is the heart touched by you,Redeemed is the soul by your side,Blessed are the eyes that behold you,For my...
    saxappeal saxappeal 46-50, F 5 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    I am scared of being alone in the dark. There are times when I'm about to sleep in my room and I just can't shrug off that weird feeling, I turn on all the lights (not just the...
    irmacoll irmacoll 22-25, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Part 2: I know I call him my "hubby" but we were never really married just engaged so this was a tiny bit easier than it could have been... After that night he never came back no...
    SherbertGainer SherbertGainer 22-25, F 3 days ago

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    Okay everyone. Please don't sent hate my way. Please don't. But after a lot of struggle and self evaluating, i am finally coming out. The real me. I've always known I was different...
    gummball gummball 18-21, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    no one here is innocent anymore. I mish being a kid. I miss being carefree. I miss being happy.
    kellyadele kellyadele 13-15, F 3 days ago

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    The great thing about being rich is you never feel envy. Money is happiness and the only people who disagree are not making as much money as they want and feel like they're doing...
    lolilover2 lolilover2 18-21, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I find being happy is having gratitude and every word you speak put I love before.
    equusrider equusrider 56-60, M 4 days ago

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    "I'm Not Happy" it started, oddly enough, by stating a simple fact. "i'm not happy." some of lifes most beautiful things are also the most simple. the look on my former employers...
    mokele mokele 31-35, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    i honestly wish i was crazy. i probably am. it all started a few years ago. a fire had burned down my house and the only thing that had survived it was a doll i made. naturally i...
    selselsky selselsky 13-15, F 6 days ago

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    It started when I closed my eyes and saw the thing floating above me. Those gaping holes where the eyes should be. Lying as if mirroring me, facing me from above. And I tried to...
    PinkMellow PinkMellow 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I know how it works, and I feel like I could figure it out, but... I don't know... I'm just so happy that my boyfriend is respectful of my boundaries
    Bethy1234321 Bethy1234321 16-17, F 6 days ago

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    How everyday was a new adventure. How the sun streamed through the window, projecting shadows of giant spiders on the wall. The sun so bright so early and sepia colored at dusk. A...
    zax2 zax2 51-55, M a week ago

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    I have the biggest desire to feel loved and happy , but Ive been hurt , and don't want to go through that again. I don't want to be disappointed or let down.
    tdfwyl tdfwyl 18-21, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I will not be a passive, unhappy, person anymore. I refuse to lose anymore of my life to my eating disorder or any other experiences that have prevented me from being the best...
    TheWhimsicalHeart TheWhimsicalHeart 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 28

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    I do not even know how to start. I am so scared. I am 21and in college and have been feeling kind of depressed lately. I have really bad ocd related to being gay and it killing me...
    cooper4545 cooper4545 18-21, M 2 Responses Jun 28

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    I'm scared of letting people know I'm bi because I don't want to be treated differently. When I was in middle school my class thought I liked girls and so no one ever wanted to go...
    AngelOfGod1506 AngelOfGod1506 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 27

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    All the material things, believing I need this or that does matter to me. Life is about being happy and wanting happiness for others.
    equusrider equusrider 56-60, M 2 Responses Jun 27

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    It's not that I'm scared of the prospect of entering a relationship, it's that I'm scared of being in one and my partner leaving... It takes two people to begin a relationship, but...
    briannawolf briannawolf 18-21, F 4 Responses Jun 26

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    I feel so unexperienced, such a pathetic little person in this huge world. My parents have made me scared of a slight change or challenge, I am a home rat, sitting and waiting for...
    Lltenti Lltenti 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 26

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    Big out of town event this weekend. Typically I have excited nervous butterflies, but I am full of dread. I have a bad feeling about this one, I can't decide if it's paranoia or...
    HotMessExpress101 HotMessExpress101 31-35, F 24 Responses Jun 26

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    That moment you realize you've already lost that one special person but you still try to keep it and totally destroy yourself just to make the person you love happy. Even if you...
    nsameshit nsameshit 18-21, F Jun 26

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    Whenever I feel really upset about something and I feel tears starting to form in my eyes I start to panic. My breathing starts to become quicker, my chest contracts, my hand...
    Sarahglen Sarahglen 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 24

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    I don't Understand why. I have been since I was a little girl. If there is a bug in my house, any kind, I will scream and freak out. If its big I will totally freak. My friends...
    emmygribbia2002 emmygribbia2002 18-21, F Jun 24

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    I'm an introvert so it's rather normal for me to love being alone. But I'm going to be living on my own next year for uni and I'm scared to death of being alone there.
    notarikon notarikon 16-17 1 Response Jun 24

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    I've always had a problem with my dad. I never felt like I was living up to my sister or being the kid he wanted. He pushed me to join sports but I had no interest in them. He made...
    emaseraptor emaseraptor 18-21, F Jun 24

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    im so use to being but myself but im scared because i like it but i dont want to be alone anymore im scared ill never find someone who cares
    Bmohunter Bmohunter 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 24

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    I'm scared because I don't think it'll turn out alright because that means being willing to spend a lot of time with the other person and I've got things I want to do, I need my...
    chocolatecream1 chocolatecream1 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 23

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    At the end of the day, it left me hurt. It came in with nothing but when it gone, it left me hollow, hurt, stupid; more than I thought I am. That's love. I thought it was a...
    QuInieFox QuInieFox 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 23

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    I've been cheated on, lied to, and thrown to the side by so many men who promised me the world, and their love. I'm now in a relationship with an amazing guy who I have been with...
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