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I Am Separated

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 151 People

    The pain I feel is like a million knifes

    stabbing at my heart...and its my own fault. How do you stop hating yourself for betraying your own morals? I had an affair on my husband of 10yrs. We are currently separated and will decide in February if we will continue with the separation, get divorced, or get back together...
    Faith2117 Faith2117 31-35, F 3 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    Separated and getting a divorce.

    It's better this way but still hurts. I'm looking for friends and to hopefully one day realize that it wasn't all my fault and feel better about myself. My soon to be ex slept with someone while we were separated, yet while we were supposedly working on our marriage, and he...
    tattoolvr81 tattoolvr81 31-35, F Apr 14

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    Happy And Finally Loving My Life!

    I left my ex awhile ago, filed for custody of our daughter, filed for permission to move out of territory and have found a fantastic job in my home town. I have a fantastic job, love my life right now and am superbly happy. I no longer thrive for more personal connection, I...
    Bancheemom Bancheemom 26-30, F Oct 30, 2013

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    Very Distraught, Emotional Agony

    My husband and I have been having problems, and I have been watching our marriage literally shrivel up and die, but not for lack of (me) trying. I have read so many books designed to save the marriage on your own, change MY attitudes and behaviours, and so on, but that had no...
    sagegirl sagegirl 36-40, F 7 Responses Sep 2, 2008

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    This Was My Choice

    I got separated and moved out from my husband about 4 months ago.  I’ve made the decision to leave him about 2 years ago but things just never worked out for me to move out.  We’ve been together for 10 years and in those 10 years we’ve been married for...
    KNell KNell 31-35, F 2 Responses Oct 11, 2010

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    And Torn

    and crushed...and every imaginable negative emotion one can think of.  I'm now a thousand miles away from my girl and don't know if we'll ever get back together again...and it ******* hurts.  I'm tired of my world shattering.  I'm tired of thinking...feeling...
    vampireheart vampireheart 31-35, T 1 Response Sep 30, 2008

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    Today Is My Anniversary

    I am seperated from my husband...we will file for divorce once we are legally allowed to...today is my wedding anniversary...we would be 7 years married. I am not sure how to feel about it...partly I think that I should feel sad because I am remembering all of the promises we...
    Flugelblues Flugelblues 31-35, F 8 Responses Sep 6, 2008

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    Separated & Not Dealing Well W/the Reality.

    I did post a few days ago.  My husband & I have been separated 3 months & tomorrow we & our respective lawyers meet.  We haven't spoken in three months.  We live in the hills of Vermont and have two homes on the property.  My husband is in one and my mother and myself in the...
    maxmoca1 maxmoca1 51-55, F 6 Responses Jan 18, 2011

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    I tried so hard not to contact my husband.

    When he left we established rules. Things like money, privacy respect such as phone records and showing up at the others persons living quarters, and communication. We are not allowed to text each other. The only communication we have is through email and its ONLY to talk about...
    Faith2117 Faith2117 31-35, F 1 Response Dec 19, 2013

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    I Was

    I left my husband about 3 months ago. He works 60# hours a week. Is a good father and provider. It just seems when he isn't ar work he is holed up in his office. Now don't get me wrong if our son has a sports activity or calls him my husband makes the time. He calls a few times a...
    Tatteredpages Tatteredpages 31-35, F Aug 10, 2013

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    I'm Not Sad

    I'm relieved! From the moment I said "I do" I knew that I had made a terrible mistake. He asked again and again if I was getting married just to get married, and time and time again I said no. When, prior to the marriage, he went on one of his tyraids and hit me, I made excuses...
    whatsmycalling whatsmycalling 36-40 1 Response Oct 9, 2012

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    My wife and I separated about six months ago

    but have stayed under the same roof for financial reasons. We are still best of friends but don't feel the same way we did when we met. We decided to open up our marriage completely and drew up an agreement which we both signed. We both feel suited to the polyamorus lifestyle...
    flailure flailure 41-45, M 2 Responses Apr 20

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    Wow I Am Feeling So Much Stronger Today!!

    Today I had my hair done. It feels good to get all that grey out. I am down a another pound and I feel great about my weight. The anxiety that has been a constant dreaded companion, left me alone today. I can breathe without a weight on my chest. I have some work to do and I am...
    GOATSDOROAM GOATSDOROAM 41-45, F Jul 26, 2013

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    My Current Sadness....

     I just joined EP 2 days ago and posted this in an empty group, but this is probably a more appropriate forum. I've been falling deeper and deeper into despair and am hoping that having the opportunity to share my feelings and pain with others may help me face it and move...
    Beansmasher Beansmasher 31-35, M 3 Responses Oct 24, 2009

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    My Wife and a Relative

    For the last 6 months I noticed different things about my wife's behavior.  She started losing weight, started wearing very nice clothing and became very distant in our marriage.  Of course, I didn't think anything about these behaviors I just thought that my...
    paulstone paulstone 36-40 2 Responses Aug 5, 2008

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    On St Patrick's Day I will have been separated

    for 4 months. I left but am still dealing with the fallout. I was accused if cheating by my no ex. I was innocent but the trust in our relationship was gone. My grandmother died the day before my birthday and I received nothing from my ex. I'm not materialistic but a card and a...
    zacsmummy zacsmummy 36-40, F Mar 14

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    "Separated"??? ... It Is More Like "Limbo"...

    "Separated"???  It sounds like there's hope that the separation will end and two will become one again... "Separated"???  It sounds like there is hope for the relationship...yes, that is what "separated" sounds like to me... That is not...
    pixelita pixelita 36-40, F 19 Responses Aug 31, 2009

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    My wife has left me. I've not been violent

    or cheated on her. I've been moody, depressed and insensitive. I've made an honest commitment to change and I am trying everything that I can to improve myself. She is so hurt that she can't even contemplate reconciling. No matter how hard I work on myself, it's up to her how...
    uku383 uku383 41-45, M Jan 23

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    Married &Amp; Separated &Amp; Confused

    I have been with my husband for almost 8 years and married for almost 3. Since we had gotten married we didn't live together. We always fought because of that but I had refused to live with his mom (I had done that before). He always came to see me and would stay over. We would...
    Believe25 Believe25 26-30 3 Responses Jun 25, 2013

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    Wow I Am Feeling So Much Stronger Today!!

    Today I had my hair done. It feels good to get all that grey out. I am down a another pound and I feel great about my weight. The anxiety that has been a constant dreaded companion, left me alone today. I can breathe without a weight on my chest. I have some work to do and I am...
    GOATSDOROAM GOATSDOROAM 41-45, F Jul 26, 2013

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    When Does All This End?

    My wife and I have known for a long time that it hasn't been working out and after 18 years we called it a day 10 months ago. We have 3 gorgeous kids that I love to bits and when we broke it to them they seem to have taken it in their stride. With the economy being what it is...
    nickode nickode 41-45, M Jul 17, 2013

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    It's Hard

    i separated from my husband nearly 18 months ago. i still love him to bits but we just don't work together. i'm finding it very hard to think about moving on even after all this time, even knowing all the problems we had will never be worked out.
    babymaddux babymaddux 26-30, F Oct 28, 2007

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    And I Am So Happy

     My husband put me through mental hell ..  he was soo abusive two hospital  trips into the psych unit and i was done .. i knew if i stuck around i would be dead ...  ive been gone almost two yrs and ive never been better !!!  i dont have to see him , talk...
    starstruck2xtrme starstruck2xtrme 26-30, F Jun 4, 2007

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    Separated And Broken Hearted

    I am separated and have been for several months. At first I tried to have contact with my spouse just to keep the connection, but unfortunately it got heated over very little things. l also was told by my spouse that it was possibly a midlife crisis and space was needed...
    83LMC02 83LMC02 46-50 1 Response Sep 10, 2011

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    Lost

    Lets see... i have been married for 12 years. my husband and i have had a wonderful marriage all these years we were eachothers best friend, he would even agree. but this past July something started to change. He pulled away from me. He has been in night school and has had...
    LookingforUs LookingforUs 36-40, F 2 Responses Jan 17, 2011

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    Learning And Living

    I left my ex-husband 9 months ago, and it was definitely the best decision I ever made. We rushed into our marriage, little did I realize how different of a person he was once we said our "I do"s. He became distant, negative and pessimistic, paranoid, and he stopped taking care...
    hooponopono hooponopono 26-30, F Oct 1, 2013

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    S.o.s

     My Wife left me in June of this year. After being married for 23 years, i'm having trouble dealing with the loss. Have attempted suicide twice. She seemingly moved on and I'm stuck here alone. Struggling to make it without her. She refuses to talk to me at all, she says she is...
    Mencrytoo Mencrytoo 46-50, M 2 Responses Oct 11, 2012

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    Reflection

    Have you ever stood in front of a mirror and just looked at yourself, trying to see what other people see? What makes you, you? It's a harsh reality when you look in the mirror and see nothing. This is how it started ; An old graying man looks back at me, with anger in his eyes...
    Mencrytoo Mencrytoo 46-50, M 1 Response Oct 14, 2012

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    and it sucks! I left work early today,

    had a miserable attitude. She asked me to leave two and a half months ago and I finally did about a month ago. She couldn't give me any answers... couldn't tell me why. Just that she was unhappy and I was the big reason she was. I don't commit to people easily. I'm 39 now...
    RavensKeep RavensKeep 36-40, M 1 Response Feb 18

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    Now What

    It's been more than a year since my former significant other moved out. I ache. I hate him for what he did to me yet I mourn his loss. I'm angry and sad, want revenge and yet secretly wish him no harm. I told my lawyer I want him eviscerated, emasculated and brought...
    datigger datigger 46-50 2 Responses Feb 12, 2008

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    My Story

    Tears welled up in my eyes, even though my heart was feeling light and free.  The reality of our situation washed over me with each new moment that signalled the end. The real estate lists, the child care agreements, the dividing of things for each new home that was being...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Feb 3, 2010

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    Separated And Wondring What To Do..

    I am separated from my wife and kids for 5 years.. Separation works better for all of us. My conservative Indian family in India would not let me divorce. I am a straight guy in forties, living alone in USA... Anyone with similar experience to share.. compare notes? Anyone...
    greatmassguy greatmassguy 41-45, M Apr 2, 2013

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    Heartbroken

    My wife of 27 years told me at first that she wasn't in love with and two days later admitted to an affair of almost two years.  She went through a similar crisis about 15 years ago and I never thought she could do it again.  I still want it to work but she says she doesn't...
    andyc61 andyc61 46-50 1 Response Jun 10, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    Final update to this group as I do not feel newly separated. I am separated wanting a divorce. I've posted my story in here so it's only fair I finish the tale of my escape from...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 11

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    August of 2014, will be 16 months since he walked out the door. Never leaving me with our boys to raise alone. Some ppl think I'm crazy for saying this, but I'm actually glad he...
    EyeDontGiveAHoot EyeDontGiveAHoot 36-40, F 6 Responses Jul 12

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    dropping my kids off at my separated wife's place....returning back to my rented lonely house...I am sad beyond words.I dont want to live here anymore.I am clickng my red ruby...
    wiseprotector wiseprotector 41-45, M 3 Responses Jul 7

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    When I was a kid, I got separated from my family in a busy street market and couldn't find my way back in all the chaos. I felt so numb that I didn't know what regret was. A...
    buggosorous buggosorous 26-30, M Jul 10

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    I have recently separated from my girlfriend, of 11 years, she said she loved me, and wanted to have a future with me, but she Lied to me and used me to solve all her problems. I...
    razerd razerd 36-40, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    My parents have been on and off since I was 3 my dad finally promised to stay home 1 year and a half ago he promised to stay with me forever but this Easter he left we found out...
    Angel2345 Angel2345 13-15, F 4 Responses Jun 29

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    I had an affair with a formet lover who is also married. I had unresolved issues with my former lover. I was never was going to leave my husband. I still love him. My husband found...
    roxy0504 roxy0504 51-55, F 1 Response Jun 29

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    I am going to do all I can to win her back by changing myself. Even if she decides she is done everyone benefits: i become the man only a fool would leave...I have learned to...
    wiseprotector wiseprotector 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 12

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    My husband is 17 years older than me. I feel guilty for leaving him, since I am 50 now and I know he needs someone to care for him. He is not ill, but has some health issues like...
    nnaymar nnaymar 46-50, F 2 Responses Jul 14

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    Do you know of anyone born July 28,1977 in lower Alabama? My mom has been looking for her baby for over thirty years.
    notannecessary notannecessary 36-40, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Let me start off by saying I'm married. For 7 years. Things were ok until about 6 months ago. Since then, I've done some terrible things. It started about 6 months ago when I...
    mylifesabook mylifesabook 31-35, F 1 Response 4 hrs ago

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    Hell is real. I made post , titled"I don't want to go to hell". I said in the post that hell is on earth now. And God will not have his creation burning for eternity. This is a...
    HeavenlyWarrior HeavenlyWarrior 26-30, M 2 Responses Jun 26

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    I got too close to my teacher. I got too emotionally involved. We were more like friends, not teacher/student. Flirty friends. About 8 or 9 months after I graduated, I told him I...
    atadbitinlove atadbitinlove 18-21, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    My heart broke over a year ago, when CBD and I separated. We got back together, but it didn't last long. Since then he has asked repeatedly for me to come back, but I have...
    sassyg1rl sassyg1rl 36-40, F Jun 25

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    Hey I've not posted for a while I've relief in support from those jn my circle. But times are changing and for lost if reasons I've had a period where a lot if my friends have...
    Sunrise13 Sunrise13 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 29

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    I met my husband whom I hav been separated from 2 years now. I hav no hard feelings towards him, we met recently. Spent the entire weekend.. It was like 2 friends hanging out...
    stuckinlife247 stuckinlife247 26-30, F 1 Response Jun 30

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    Nine months ago, while I was at a lakeside music festival, I ran into an old acquaintance. John and I had met in 2008 through a mutual friend. Over the years, our paths had crossed...
    wastedmonths wastedmonths 26-30 1 Response Jul 3

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    When I was younger my older sisters bullied me! When I was in my late teens and 20's they would criticize me, judge me unjustly and report me to my very unrealistically...
    lagatta lagatta 41-45, F 4 Responses Jul 4