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I Am Shutting Down

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 262 People

    I Feel So Alone

    I go to a counsellor for anxiety and depression, and I can't seem to tell her half the things that are going on. I've shut her out of half my life I need help with. But I just can't bring myself to tell her. I feel stupid and pathetic. Like everyone's just laughing at me because...
    MessedUpGirl MessedUpGirl 22-25, F 4 Responses May 10, 2012

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    I just don't know what I want anymore.

    Everything seems okay, but I'm getting tired of this jaded world. What's the point of trying to make sense of anything. It's never going to be what you think it is.
    LeviathanWhiteStag LeviathanWhiteStag 16-17, F Mar 31

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    I'm so afraid of getting hurt.

    Of feeling love. Or feeling joy. Because the minute I'm happy... Standing on my feet.... The rug gets snatched from under me. I'm closing up. Shutting down. I can't take it anymore. I can't escape my own head.
    BrokenPhoenixx BrokenPhoenixx 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 15

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    Do You Know This Feeling?

    I can't be the only one who is constantly hitting delete. I never know where to begin...or even express at all for that matter. I've hid so much of myself all these years that it overwhelms me. I'm so suffocated in here, but nothing is saving me. I want to understand what...
    Kkl3v Kkl3v 18-21, F Mar 14, 2013

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    Older And Need Help, I Am Shutting Down...

    I am a writer by profession, and I have published a few books and ebooks. Recently I have been having a hard time completing my latest manuscript because I feel like it's all completely hopeless. I belong to several social networks but I keep running into trolls, and with no...
    tm914 tm914 56-60 4 Responses Apr 23, 2011

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    I Dont Even Kniw Why

    So on monday i woke up feeling so horrible about myself hating myself for being me.i was so not up for school but it would have been worse if i didnt go. I got to school and i almost cried in front if my teacher when he asked what was wrong... I think he saw and said i disnt have...
    rageandhate rageandhate 18-21 2 Responses Feb 27, 2013

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    damn... it´s just that.

    .. I was so up, so high on achievements (so ridiculous, so small)... now I have nothing... I feel worthless, like if I leave now no one will care... What am I doing with my life? why am I pushing away all those who love me? just... just want to sleep... and never wake...
    jsabina11 jsabina11 18-21, M Mar 21

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    Don't Make Me Feel Again ...

    Please don't smile at me in that way Please don't reach into my heart and make me feel something Please don't touch me in a way i can't handle please don't hold me because i may just break Please don't make my heart ache for you Please let me walk quietly away into the dark I can...
    deadinsideout deadinsideout 26-30, F Jul 23, 2013

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    Fading to black...

    I can't explain it but I feel it happening. I'm distancing myself from everyone and everything. Shutting down. Some people have an off switch, I don't. I just sort of fade to black.
    zillaron zillaron 51-55, M 15 Responses Aug 19, 2009

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    Hi all. Not really sure what this app is all

    about. But I lost my fiancée in a horrific truck accident on Friday night. Just reaching out to others who have also lost someone.
    skysie skysie 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 16

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    Loner Forever

    first of all, i would like to ask anyone who reads this that they could give some advice because i would like a third party perspective please! so here i am in high school, it was last year in this class with someone i used to be friends with in middle school and we start...
    catcraig catcraig 16-17, F Apr 30, 2010

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    Necessary

    Everyone has issues, and problems that they are facing.  I do share bits and pieces of how I feel and what is going on with a select few...but, really, not all of it. I made that mistake once, I won't do that again. I take responsibility for this because, well...I did it to...
    SweetlyLingering SweetlyLingering 70+, F 1 Response Feb 26, 2012

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    I Am Through Sharing Now

    I am. I have had it. I will no longer let anyone else in. I know what happens now when I do. they love me, they leave me. I am sure it's me now. Goodbye, connection with others. No, this is not a suicide thing. But it is a spiritual death.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Oct 29, 2013

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    Saving My Sanity?

    I don't really want to. I would like to still be "there" I'm shutting Down to damn near everything at this point except my friends? I don't even know at the moment what's going on. What I can feel right now is that my heart hurts and I really just want to curl up in a nice little...
    CowgirlMagic CowgirlMagic 18-21, F Jul 13, 2011

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    Subhuman

    I feel like i'm just a quivering mass of nerves, not in human form or sometimes i don't feel normal human emotion. Something's wrong with me.
    NikkiBlack NikkiBlack 16-17, F 4 Responses Aug 19, 2009

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    Saving My Sanity?

    I don't really want to. I would like to still be "there" I'm shutting Down to damn near everything at this point except my friends? I don't even know at the moment what's going on. What I can feel right now is that my heart hurts and I really just want to curl up in a nice little...
    CowgirlMagic CowgirlMagic 18-21, F Jul 13, 2011

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    A Shutter Is Coming Down....

    Around my heart. I believe that everyone has limits as to how much hurt they can humanly take before something takes over and you change. I am still sensitive, caring and kind but I have learnt to hold back now. I know I come across as very caring and kind and that isn't always a...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 16, 2011

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    I Changed Direction

    I used to be shut down but I opened up to my girlfriend as things were going smoothly.. Now I'm changing direction, I'm closing down to everyone and everything and I feel like I can't tell anyone anything and don't have the rights to be upset, sad or anything. I always cry to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 4, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    My daughter is a little over one year old. ( I don't like talking in months)She has Down Syndrome. I don't treat her differently from my other kids. Her needs are a little...
    Kryzta Kryzta 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 8

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    I calm myself down cuz no one else does . But I calm myself down in abnormal ways sometimes I insult myself and then I calm down . And other ways to lazy to write them.
    DrowningInPain2 DrowningInPain2 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    I've been let down a lot. People always saying their their for me or saying their gonna help me or gonna do this but don't and exactly why I don't really depend on anyone now but...
    WoundedDreamer WoundedDreamer 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 14

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    Why does the people who say will stand by you are always the ones to let you down the most? I think is because you expect more from those people. But isnt that just sad that we...
    ThisChica ThisChica 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 26

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    I used to be friend with a girl who was barely two years older than I was. Anytime she would discuss a situation in her life to me, she would end up saying how I was too young to...
    Untamablespark Untamablespark 22-25, F Jun 30

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    So I was walking around a shopping mall today. I saw some sun glass the place was in front of a Hollister I went to grabbe a pare of sun glass when my pants fell down. That's not...
    sniper15rex sniper15rex 13-15, M Jul 5

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    Most times I feel that bad things happens to good people because personally I feel attacked I'm the person to blame I do nothing but wish everybody the best but then I lose myself...
    rique20 rique20 18-21, M 3 days ago

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    I download them in html text-only format so they are very light (no pictures included really cut the weight of a webpage down) for future reading.
    psycopower90 psycopower90 22-25, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    have been strapped down for dental work have you ever been strapped down
    goodnites32 goodnites32 22-25, M 12 hrs ago

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    I honestly hate showing my emotions sometimes this one day we was getting to know each other in class and i'm normally the quite one so me speaking was a amazement to others...
    lay1 lay1 13-15, F Jun 22

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    I need someone to talk too as I'm feeling down
    Holthemole Holthemole 22-25, F Jun 22

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    I just wanna settle down in a small town and make babies. City life sucks for raising a family!
    bluedreamsa33 bluedreamsa33 26-30, M Jun 22

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    I honestly dont understand it. Whenever i meet a guy it goes so well for the first week or two and then a guy will try and play the extreme alpha male :( You already got me just...
    AshhBashh92 AshhBashh92 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 25

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    my big sister always looks down on me, she calls me fat, says that I suck , and that dancing will never get me anywhere in life.. Basically makes me feel like I was a mistake, I...
    stephhunny1 stephhunny1 13-15, F 2 Responses Jun 25

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    There's this chick at work (don't usually use that term, chick) but this dingbat 'chick' is all of 20 and ive been waiting tables for 25+ years and she's always talking down to me...
    133jenn 133jenn 46-50, F 2 Responses Jun 26

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    I'm down to earth, very respectful and interesting. I just got these compliments from my mom.
    amberswits amberswits 22-25, F 9 Responses Jun 26

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    How do I get rid of this feeling? I've been feeling so down and negative I just want to feel okay again.
    emelon12 emelon12 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 29

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    Rolf Harris is guilty. I am really shocked. Really let down. He was a hero to me. :(
    Invisible75 Invisible75 36-40, M Jun 30

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    Not only am I down to earth, but I actually have an aversion to anything related to "outer space". I visited the Kennedy Space Center a few years ago and the only thing I found...
    RaverFan RaverFan 41-45 Jul 2

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    Young guys and even teens seem to really dress up for occasions like prom, weddings etc but they also go somewhat casual sometimes. I came across two brothers, casually dressed for...
    beachfoot12 beachfoot12 22-25, M 2 Responses Jul 2

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    Back in the first year of school everything was great and fun, and innocently happy. Now, in such a short time everything has changed and I feel, well, crap. All the time. In the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 3

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    I don't. It's that simple. I do t back down I don't give up and I never accept failure as an option
    Fittererboy Fittererboy 18-21, M Jul 3

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    I am on my way to a break down. I am at work and in a meeting and everyobe is laughing and having a good time and I am on the verge of just screaming and crying. :( nothing seems...
    LostAriel LostAriel 22-25, F Jul 3

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    I had dream last night that I went to a family party in Salinas. I invited my guy who likes me, even though I know he likes me I just invited him as a friend. In the party I was...
    Idreamtowaketofindthefate Idreamtowaketofindthefate 18-21, F Jul 5

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    Yeah. It was when we were still living in a subdivision. Me and my friends were playing outside a big house that's under renovation. I pulled out a candle and lit it. And I was 10...
    TheKDoomsday TheKDoomsday 13-15, F Jul 5

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    Who wants to pull these down??
    morninglory68 morninglory68 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 5

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    Last night for absolutely no reason (actually there might be a reason that I don't know about) anyway I broke down in my bed and cried it was terrible since I hate crying. Congrats...
    Nightfang109 Nightfang109 13-15, M Jul 5

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    "What are you doing down there? Come on get up!"If there's someone you know that is hurting or falling over in life and can't get up help them! You never know if you need that help...
    MilweePetite MilweePetite 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 6

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    Only been on here 2 days and due to an internet **** up , I feel like I've let people down............. and theres nothing I can do..... Waiting for the new phone and net...
    thataussie thataussie 36-40, M Jul 10

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    My life feels like a roller coaster. I'm constantly going up and down. I know everyone has their bad and good days, but with me, it changes multiple times in a day. One second I'm...
    Ashley1421 Ashley1421 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 10

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    I was washing the sand off my body under a beach shower, when one of my friends came from behind me and pulled my bikini panties down. On the other side, using the opposite shower...
    Paca24 Paca24 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 11

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