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I Am Shutting Down

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 275 People

    I'm so afraid of getting hurt.

    Of feeling love. Or feeling joy. Because the minute I'm happy... Standing on my feet.... The rug gets snatched from under me. I'm closing up. Shutting down. I can't take it anymore. I can't escape my own head.
    BrokenPhoenixx BrokenPhoenixx 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 15

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    Well, it won't be the first time.

    I don't what else to do :(
    MusicJunkie6794 MusicJunkie6794 18-21, M 1 Response Oct 8

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    Don't Make Me Feel Again ...

    Please don't smile at me in that way Please don't reach into my heart and make me feel something Please don't touch me in a way i can't handle please don't hold me because i may just break Please don't make my heart ache for you Please let me walk quietly away into the dark I can...
    deadinsideout deadinsideout 26-30, F Jul 23, 2013

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    Subhuman

    I feel like i'm just a quivering mass of nerves, not in human form or sometimes i don't feel normal human emotion. Something's wrong with me.
    NikkiBlack NikkiBlack 16-17, F 4 Responses Aug 19, 2009

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    Do You Know This Feeling?

    I can't be the only one who is constantly hitting delete. I never know where to begin...or even express at all for that matter. I've hid so much of myself all these years that it overwhelms me. I'm so suffocated in here, but nothing is saving me. I want to understand what...
    Kkl3v Kkl3v 18-21, F Mar 14, 2013

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    Hi all. Not really sure what this app is all

    about. But I lost my fiancée in a horrific truck accident on Friday night. Just reaching out to others who have also lost someone.
    skysie skysie 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 16

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    Necessary

    Everyone has issues, and problems that they are facing.  I do share bits and pieces of how I feel and what is going on with a select few...but, really, not all of it. I made that mistake once, I won't do that again. I take responsibility for this because, well...I did it to...
    SweetlyLingering SweetlyLingering 70+, F 1 Response Feb 26, 2012

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    Saving My Sanity?

    I don't really want to. I would like to still be "there" I'm shutting Down to damn near everything at this point except my friends? I don't even know at the moment what's going on. What I can feel right now is that my heart hurts and I really just want to curl up in a nice little...
    CowgirlMagic CowgirlMagic 18-21, F Jul 13, 2011

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    Saving My Sanity?

    I don't really want to. I would like to still be "there" I'm shutting Down to damn near everything at this point except my friends? I don't even know at the moment what's going on. What I can feel right now is that my heart hurts and I really just want to curl up in a nice little...
    CowgirlMagic CowgirlMagic 18-21, F Jul 13, 2011

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    I just don't know what I want anymore.

    Everything seems okay, but I'm getting tired of this jaded world. What's the point of trying to make sense of anything. It's never going to be what you think it is.
    LeviathanWhiteStag LeviathanWhiteStag 16-17, F Mar 31

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    Older And Need Help, I Am Shutting Down...

    I am a writer by profession, and I have published a few books and ebooks. Recently I have been having a hard time completing my latest manuscript because I feel like it's all completely hopeless. I belong to several social networks but I keep running into trolls, and with no...
    tm914 tm914 56-60 3 Responses Apr 23, 2011

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    I Changed Direction

    I used to be shut down but I opened up to my girlfriend as things were going smoothly.. Now I'm changing direction, I'm closing down to everyone and everything and I feel like I can't tell anyone anything and don't have the rights to be upset, sad or anything. I always cry to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 4, 2011

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    Loner Forever

    first of all, i would like to ask anyone who reads this that they could give some advice because i would like a third party perspective please! so here i am in high school, it was last year in this class with someone i used to be friends with in middle school and we start...
    catcraig catcraig 16-17, F Apr 30, 2010

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    I Feel So Alone

    I go to a counsellor for anxiety and depression, and I can't seem to tell her half the things that are going on. I've shut her out of half my life I need help with. But I just can't bring myself to tell her. I feel stupid and pathetic. Like everyone's just laughing at me because...
    MessedUpGirl MessedUpGirl 22-25, F 4 Responses May 10, 2012

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    damn... it´s just that.

    .. I was so up, so high on achievements (so ridiculous, so small)... now I have nothing... I feel worthless, like if I leave now no one will care... What am I doing with my life? why am I pushing away all those who love me? just... just want to sleep... and never wake...
    jsabina11 jsabina11 18-21, M Mar 21

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    Fading to black...

    I can't explain it but I feel it happening. I'm distancing myself from everyone and everything. Shutting down. Some people have an off switch, I don't. I just sort of fade to black.
    zillaron zillaron 51-55, M 15 Responses Aug 19, 2009

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    I Am Through Sharing Now

    I am. I have had it. I will no longer let anyone else in. I know what happens now when I do. they love me, they leave me. I am sure it's me now. Goodbye, connection with others. No, this is not a suicide thing. But it is a spiritual death.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Oct 29, 2013

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    A Shutter Is Coming Down....

    Around my heart. I believe that everyone has limits as to how much hurt they can humanly take before something takes over and you change. I am still sensitive, caring and kind but I have learnt to hold back now. I know I come across as very caring and kind and that isn't always a...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 16, 2011

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    I Dont Even Kniw Why

    So on monday i woke up feeling so horrible about myself hating myself for being me.i was so not up for school but it would have been worse if i didnt go. I got to school and i almost cried in front if my teacher when he asked what was wrong... I think he saw and said i disnt have...
    rageandhate rageandhate 18-21 2 Responses Feb 27, 2013

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    All the time people say "calm down, calm down" i hare it, it dosent make me calm down, maybe if you say it in a extremely silly way i will
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    He's trying again. Is that what it is? When he's nice one evening and the kids ask me why. When I get frustrated at my own lack of ability with something and he actually says it's...
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    Just by living, I let a few of my family down. I let myself down everyday.
    PokeCotard PokeCotard 13-15, M 1 Response Nov 28

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    When I get overwhelmed I tend to shut down. I also tend to overwhelm others and not know when to slow my pace down to an acceptable level. As Paul Simon said, "the nearer your...
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    Over 30 years ago we had a friend from Scandinavia who had moved to the States introduce us to sleeping with a Down Comforter. It was a glorious experience then as it is to day. As...
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    Hey! I'm feeling down for some reason. I'm a guy from Sweden, lived in Norway for 1 year and now I'm living in paradise, Thailand. or, atleast for now. I would say I got a really...
    znik znik 18-21, M 2 Responses Dec 4

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    I feel like life is one knock after another. 110% effort to just feel deflated and neglected. I should be happy, I'm on pills to stop me feeling down but I still feel down. It's...
    friendlygent friendlygent 26-30, M 1 Response Dec 9

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    We were at the supermarket . . . . my wife Lynda had a loose fitting top on, and when we got to the checkout I noticed that her bra strap had slipped off her shoulder, I'm guessing...
    lynmar86 lynmar86 26-30, M 2 Responses Dec 10

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    We were at the supermarket . . . . my wife Lynda had a loose fitting top on, and when we got to the checkout I noticed that her bra strap had slipped off her shoulder, I'm guessing...
    lynmar86 lynmar86 26-30, M 2 Responses Dec 10

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    I Have A Brain You Know - A lot of people OL talk down to me like they think i'm some sort of insane man-child or moron with the brain of a 5 year old. Dude, I HAVE a brain you...
    Monstermaster13 Monstermaster13 22-25, M Dec 12

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    I've met a really great guy. I love being with him. I'm worried my ex will ruin it. He won't leave me alone. I called the police and they stopped him coming round. He's still...
    paliglass paliglass 31-35, F 2 Responses Nov 29

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    if i was anymore down to earth I be six feet under.....
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    Well you want to hear about harsh rejections, try being rejected and trying to meet women for just the smallest intimacy from a woman. I've been trying to have this for 4 years...
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    I am breaking. Falling apart. A spectator in my own downfall. I simply don't know what to do. Why is it so hard?
    maiomeN maiomeN 16-17, F Dec 3

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    there's many different possibilities to this. people who are emotionally hurt would kick people when they're already down because it makes them feel better. people might do it...
    Bree9696 Bree9696 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 4

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    I write down my thoughts. Right now I am writing them on EP. I am having a variety of thoughts. I can't write them all. The ones I chose are the ones that I feel can lead me...
    tryingagainII tryingagainII 56-60, M 1 Response Dec 5

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    Dear Christians, yes I am one too. Yes I think it is ok to be human and have needs and have a faith. Yes I think God loves us and wants us primarily to be happy. The person who...
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    Idk... I've been feeling down these past few weeks. Maybe I'm just lonely, or tired of stuff. I have lots of problem and the worse is I can never seem to talk about it...
    DustAngel DustAngel 13-15, F Dec 9

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    My pet chinchilla has to be put down tomorrow. I never thought I would feel this way about an animal because I never have before. Animals really get in your heart. :(
    Milkshakedrinker Milkshakedrinker 26-30, F Dec 9

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    i am feeling down now. i thought i'm gonna be okay three hours ago. but to be honest i am feeling pretty bad right now. i don't feel like talking with anyone...i just wanna forget...
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    when people say "Money don't grow on trees." Don't people wait for trees to grow and then cut them down to make money?...so money does grow on trees then made....or?
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    I want a horny woman to pull my pants down and see what I have for her ...
    00000MG 00000MG 51-55, M