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I Am Still Recovering

Recovery is a process. 258 People

    I See That Light At The End Of The Tunnel!

    And I'm not on any pink cloud, just working on the whole positive thing. I can do this, regardless what people think or do. I finally have hope, and that's something I'm proud of.
    Kidd12 Kidd12 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 14, 2012

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    Relapse

    I recently relapsed.ive been smoking meth for the past week and a half everyday.i want to stop-i think im getting sucked in again.Do i have to go back into treatment or can  i just go everyday next week to NA meetings. I dont even have a sponser yet and i think thats why...
    angelwingz angelwingz 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 4, 2009

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    Voices Are Still Here

    I know I said that this will be my positive account but it is so damn hard to think and be positive all the time, to shut up and not listen voices in my head saying: dont eat that, you dont need food, exercise more.. and I am really trying to be better but i just feel such a...
    WayToHappiness WayToHappiness 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 4, 2012

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    Living In The Present - February 21

    The present moment is all we have. Yes, we have plans and goals, a vision for tomorrow. But now is the only time we possess. And it is enough. We can clear our mind of the residue of yesterday. We can clear our mind of fears of tomorrow. We can be present, now. We can make...
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F Feb 21, 2013

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    Today's One Sentence Inspiration

    I may have escaped the blaming eyes of my mother, and the reproachful eyes of my brother, but I cannot escape myself. The only thing that I can do to save myself is to stop obsessing over my past and let go of my resentments. I need to only focus on today, and keep working...
    RLLauren RLLauren 31-35, F Aug 10, 2013

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    Hey guys. It's been..

    a month+ since everything happened? The depression.. I'm not sure about that but I've surely procrastinated. I was a top student. I'm so behind. Besides that I've been.. hiding myself. Flirting, distracting myself from him. But today he was brought up and now he's back in my...
    ThanhN ThanhN 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 27, 2013

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    Our Path - February 19

    I just spent several hours with someone from my group, and I feel like I'm losing my mind. This woman insisted that the only way I would make progress in my program was to go to her church and succumb to her religious rules. She pushed and insisted, and insisted and pushed. She's...
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F Feb 18, 2013

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    Fighting For Freedom

    When I think back to my dark times, I remember that they were only a few weeks ago. Sometimes I miss them as odd as it may seem. Not eating and throwing up everyday made me feel strong. I thought I was strong for hurting myself. Three days after I started recovery I descovered a...
    StarvedAndScarred StarvedAndScarred 18-21, F Sep 13, 2012

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    Not Working...

    It seems like i will never be happy about my look and my body... i think almost every day how i should starve myself again to become skinny again and i feel like i am getting fat, i suppose i am getting fat because i eat more, but my friends tell me that i look the same as before...
    WayToHappiness WayToHappiness 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 5, 2012

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    Time That Has Past But Still Hangs Over Head...

    So last March i had a major breakdown... I had been having a lot of problems with depression... I took my life into my own hands and swallowed enough anti depressants to put myself into respiratory arrest, damage my liver and kidneys, and give myself a sever case of pneumonia...
    Thatguywiththebluehair Thatguywiththebluehair 22-25, M Feb 20, 2011

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    Always Recovering,never Recovered

    First AA meeting in 1977.According to statistics will never get my "diploma"recovering is a lifetime thing.no longer attend meetings,81 and shut in cause of health.AA was (is) the best thing ever happened to me,Forever grateful,Pray others that need help find it or...
    foreverme foreverme 70+, F 6 Responses Mar 8, 2009

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    Grace Over Repression

    I still have days When my wounded self Overrides my hard-earned recovery A vague sub-consciousness Of some debilitating grip Common emotional neglect Useless insecurities and doubts Slithering fears They loom large at times And out of proportion Seems unfair To wage war with the...
    iNtuitiveFEeling iNtuitiveFEeling 51-55, M 1 Response Dec 25, 2012

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    Recovery Is A Journey...

    I truly believe this.I am recovering from a number of issues in my life, and I always will be until the day I die.The first step in my recovery was to recognise and also accept that I have a problem and things need to change. And I need to keep reminding myself of this. Then I...
    GreenMonsterGal GreenMonsterGal 22-25 May 8, 2011

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    I've had various eating disorders

    for the last six and a half years. (That number makes me so angry, and sad.) I've been actively trying to recover (on my own) for about a year/a year and a half now, with not much success. The hardest part (if I had to choose one) is probably the constant fight that goes on...
    letsmakeithappen letsmakeithappen 18-21, F Jan 18

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    Bipolar and Drug and Alcohol Problems

    I have been drinking for years and have always abused substances. After being told for at least 2 years I had a problem i finally seeked help. I went to a residential rehab for 3months and tried really hard and learned a lot. I managed to stay clean for 7 months. I was drinking...
    fergyshmerg fergyshmerg 31-35 1 Response Jul 15, 2009

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    Recovery-july 4, 2013 At 8:36 Am.

    Recovery! I am in recovery! LOL. Sounds a bit like I am recovering some furniture. I am recovering myself! Listen! What does recovery mean? As defined, it means regaining or improving a former condition. And it also means the regaining of something lost. Many of us think of...
    PoetryNEmotion PoetryNEmotion 51-55, F 2 Responses Jul 4, 2013

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    A Day In The Life Of A Nobody.

    Major depression. Cyclothymia. Schizotypal. Anxiety. Anxiety. Anxiety. Self harm. Lie. Razors. Suicide. Therapy. Pills. Overdose. Suicide. Lie. Mental hospital. Lie. Suicide. Overdose. Cut. Cut. Cut. Lie. Therapy. Overdose. Suicide. Mental hospital. Molested. Lie. Overdose...
    somethingbecomingnothing somethingbecomingnothing 18-21, F Sep 3, 2012

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    I'm trying so hard to be happy,

    and live life in a positive way... But it's so difficult and I want to cut so bad I feel the need to but I don't know if I even care what anyone else will say if they see... Idk what to even do anymore):
    InsecureTiana InsecureTiana 13-15, F 3 Responses Jan 22

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    Disordered

    I've been eating disordered since i was 16 years old. I'm 24 now. It started out as anorexia, turned into bulimia, and then binge eating. I am so unhappy with my weight. I've been trying to recover for the past 8 years - a long time to struggle with something that is a daily...
    Mary1634 Mary1634 22-25, F 1 Response May 7, 2011

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    Trying To Recover

    Some of you may know me as NeverThinEnough... that is my old depressed, anorexic account here, on EP... but i decided to recover from anorexia. It is hard, you know, like - sometimes you feel like you can beat this and you eat,you feel happy, you feel full of motivation and...
    WayToHappiness WayToHappiness 16-17, F 2 Responses Mar 3, 2012

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    I Won't Lie

    Some nights, many nights, I pace outside the bathroom door. I have felt the weight of last night's meal, heavy, gluey, I have felt it itching to crawl back up my esophagus. Some nights, well. (I won't lie.) But this night, many nights, I turn away, Back to bed, back to sleep.
    mariacaterina mariacaterina 16-17, F Dec 30, 2012

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    It's been about what,

    a week since I experienced my "heartbreak"? Don't get me wrong; my heart still aches for him. But I'm getting better. I haven't cried every single minute to the hour. But I decided to catch up with family and friends. And it feels pretty good, very exciting. I don't know how...
    ThanhN ThanhN 16-17, F Dec 1, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    My ex and I have been together two different times. The first time lasted 3 months and then 6 months later we ended up together again for a year. It's been a little over two months...
    LameyC LameyC 18-21, F a week ago

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    I am a recovering alcoholic , I haven't drank in ten yrs , but I've watched my husband get blitzed everyday of his life for the last ten yrs , we have a 12 yr old daughter together...
    donewitit donewitit 41-45, F 1 Response Mar 20

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    I did it. I finally called a helpline about my self harm and depression problems and I'm so proud of myself. I then told my brother. I had cut that afternoon, but it was a bad one...
    writercookies writercookies 13-15, F 6 days ago

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    5 years ago today I picked up this white poker chip at an AA meeting. It signified 1 day sober. Through the grace of God and the help of a lot of family and friends I'm still...
    ChilliDog ChilliDog 41-45, M 7 Responses Apr 3

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    I am an adult who was molested by a priest. Can, or even, should I reconcile with the church that I loved and had utter faith in as a child, when that very faith and trust left...
    usedchild usedchild 56-60, M 2 Responses Apr 11

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    Ok so im a mother for 2 girls 19 and 22 and my babby kid is 13 . He is still walking around in the house after shower and some times he skinny dipping in our pool . Is that normal...
    emilly38 emilly38 31-35, F 5 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I'm still standing... Somehow...
    emilsson60 emilsson60 13-15, M 4 hrs ago

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    I am still a mother.I am still a mother, even though I don't get to hold my child, even though I don't get to kiss her boo-boos. I am still a mother, even though I don't get to see...
    NYSlilAngel NYSlilAngel 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 3

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    I still love my Ex boyfriend Dorian event though it seems that I have moved on but I still have the a special place in my heart for him. Maybe its because he was my first...
    lyricbutterfly2013 lyricbutterfly2013 18-21, F Mar 30

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    well getting ready to come into a another summer on critters back I rode him all winter and I'm still riding him as I type this I'm looking forward to a good summer on his back he...
    plushybackrider plushybackrider 41-45, M 5 days ago

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    Ya know it's funny, because I really thought I didn't anymore, I really didn't think I still loved you I didn't feel like I needed you thought I would be fine without you, and I...
    A7xinsane A7xinsane 18-21, M Mar 24

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    I still love my ex boyfriend Dorian because he meant the world to me because I am trying to move on but its so hard. He was my first everything I miss he him because he took my...
    lyricbutterfly2013 lyricbutterfly2013 18-21, F Apr 4

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    I am still close friends with my ex who I still love. We've not been together for longer than the length of the relationship pretty much, but I still can't shake off these feelings...
    AHelpfulLover AHelpfulLover 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 5

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    I am 23 years old and have spend the last two years of my life with the most amazing man ever. We started talking while I was in a short term relationship with another guy, it was...
    equisgirl1 equisgirl1 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 9

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    Well, my ex boyfriend and I broke up approximately three weeks ago. Were were together for a year and one month and it was a pretty serious relationship which you guys will...
    ambitousk ambitousk 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I'm still a fan. I could be 50 and still remember Pikachu. The franchise is still active, new things are added every generation, it makes me wanna continue playing the video games...
    HottRoddTX HottRoddTX 26-30, M 2 Responses Mar 23

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    I know I did wrong and I know she did Wrong too but I can see how my reactions influenced her actions and how we fed off each other to no good end.... She seems like she's happy in...
    guyhasname guyhasname 36-40, M Apr 5

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    I was depressed all the time a mother of toe and one on the way I felt lost I had a home And husband a car a boat a family.. No reason I know now to be depressed I lost my 7 month...
    laceykight laceykight 26-30, F 6 days ago

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    My mother suddenly died two years ago at age 57 and my father started dating again shortly after. It was understandably an incredibly horrific time for my father and it was...
    SisyphusGirl SisyphusGirl 36-40, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    God damnit, I ******* miss you Kim. I wish I wasn't so stupid. Maybe it's because something reminded me of you. Maybe it's because I still listen to the Autumn Effect. I swear to...
    airisfleeting airisfleeting 22-25, M Mar 20

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    My boyfriend broke up with me because we were "growing apart" So in other words, he doesn't love me anymore. It is so difficult to get over him now, because I still love him. I'd...
    ashley719 ashley719 16-17, F 3 Responses Mar 20

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    Where I'm going, I don't know. Still the same after 3 mths, of separation,some days are better than others. I am keeping busy with my kids, mom, dogs and work. I'm very fragile...
    bahalana75 bahalana75 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 21

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    I'm 27 going on 28 by end of this year. I'm still living with my parents and a younger sister whose life seems to go so much better than mine,... she has a stable job that keeps...
    DontreallyknowwhoIam DontreallyknowwhoIam 26-30, F Mar 21

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    I'm still in love with him. I don't know what to do. I want to be over him but it's so hard. He broke my heart but I still can't get over him.
    WeekndOVOXO WeekndOVOXO 16-17, F Mar 22

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    I was in a relationship for the first time and it was a secret. This relationship was the best. He was not the gentleman that I dreamed of and i still loved him. I was a bipolar...
    AnniaVanilla AnniaVanilla 16-17, F Mar 23

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    I still miss him after an year of our breakup. I get jealous seeing other couples. I miss that bond of affection. I mishis caring actions. I still want to be with him. I miss our...
    steee15 steee15 18-21, F Mar 27

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    Every day, I wonder how different things would have been if I never got into that car accident that night, and you were still here. I wonder if I would have been a good mother to...
    NYSlilAngel NYSlilAngel 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 29

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    Although we don't have sex we communicate. Even though I have two kids with another woman she willingly stays in my life and is always there for me. She avoids answering personal...
    coldchiln coldchiln 22-25, M Mar 30

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    It has dinosaurs on it but a pink background... Lol. I guess my parents knew I wouldn't exactly be a total girly-girl. My blanket didn't actually matter to me until I was...
    Boo37 Boo37 13-15, F Mar 31

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    You see, I fell in love with a girl.. We've been having on and off fights for 3 years since we've met. It's mostly because I'm selfish and all I ever cared for was myself. Now we...
    IzzyTheGreat IzzyTheGreat 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 31

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    please don't let my age fool you.. I was in a relationship with this boy for a whole year. me and him shared so many memories, had such a bond, and he was really honestly my first...
    brooklynitexo brooklynitexo 22-25, F Apr 3

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