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I Am Struggling To Keep Myself Together

It's hard, considering the circumstances. 6,147 People

    You don't know pain until you are staring at

    yourself in the mirror with tears streaming down your face, and you're begging yourself to just hold on and be strong. That is pain.
    Ana104 Ana104 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 24

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    Today was a very hard day.

    A very hard day of a very hard week. A very hard week that makes the very hard month just past seem continous, out of a very hard summer. In short, it's a very hard day in the very hard life I've been in since I was born. Why am I complaining?
    Itekimasu Itekimasu 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    i dont know...if its true

    because letting me fall in pieces is not a luxury right now even if its tempting....!!!! as long as i know myself i know her....my mother the centre of my life and the reason i kept surviving pain and suffering because i thought she needed me...........i first thought i should...
    snuffal snuffal 26-30, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    So Sunday at work I blacked out,

    hit my nose on a shelf, and fell. My nose was bleeding and customers were horrified of course but when I blacked out I was still partially conscious. I was not aware what was happening though. I remember thinking when I hit my nose "Ouch! what was that?!" Then I hit the floor...
    artsydarling artsydarling 18-21, F Jun 16

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    I Feel Like I'm Having A Constant Battle Against Myself...

    I've never really acknowledged this before, but I kind of want to now. It's getting old. I'm calm and collect on the outside but on the inside I just feel crazy. Like with my mom, on the outside. I show that I'm happy, even at times that I'm like whatever she's gone. But when I...
    Greeneyedandcurious Greeneyedandcurious 22-25, F Jul 23, 2012

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    Lesson From Pfophet Job's(peace Be Upon Him) Struggle

    Those afflicted with calamities and distress should remember the story of Prophet Job (Qurโ€™an calls him Aiyub). Ah! What a heart-melting story of pain and suffering, of patience and forbearance, of faith and gratitude, and ultimately of reward and success! ย  Prophet Job...
    sunshines333 sunshines333 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 20, 2012

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    hello depression my old friend.

    Do you want to know what the voices are telling me now. I can't explain but they are very helpfull. my heart wanted to shot a gun at his head. he was stolen and he was broken. I had to find him and pick the pieces up glue him together. he healed but the scars are still...
    Poeticdeaths Poeticdeaths 18-21, M 3 Responses Apr 14

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    Woke up this morning feeling

    so low. Feeling anxious and felt the rising panic inside. Wondering if I will ever know what it feels like to be loved and wanted by a Man. So tired of it always being one way. I give everything but it's never enough. Rejection always. So tired of it all.
    chrissie58 chrissie58 46-50, F 6 Responses Sep 23, 2014

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    I'm bored, life is boring,

    I stopped feeling sad, angry, and scared, I try to find joy but it seems that I can't smile, happiness is becoming strange to me, I just don't care anymore.
    psychopuppet23 psychopuppet23 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 28

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    The same boiling water

    that softens the potato hardens the egg. It's about what your made of, not the circumstances.
    asad005 asad005 22-25, M 3 days ago

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    My Husaband Acts Like A 2 Years Old

    I am just so tired of his logic,When I told him he should stop driving so fast, and look at the speed limits. he said that I should trust him, and I insulted him! and I should know that he doesn't mean to kill us! I said accidents happen and we have the most road kills...
    LordVoldemort LordVoldemort 36-40, F 48 Responses Jan 25, 2010

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    For as long as I can remember I've never been

    comfortable in my own skin. Most of the little confidence I did have was shattered a few years ago, when the girls at my school started to bully me about how I looked. I felt, alone and they often isolated me from everything. So o began to isolate myself to save myself from any...
    Awhiteorchid Awhiteorchid 18-21, F 7 Responses Nov 22, 2014

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    Day By Day, Sometimes Minute By Minute!

    I struggle everyday to keep myself together. It's not pleasant to have all that I have to deal with and the pain that I must cope with also, is enough for anyone to lose their mind. I struggle each day, some so painful that I have to take them minute my minute, or hour by hour to...
    TwilightDream TwilightDream 36-40, F 6 Responses Feb 17, 2012

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    Well. In 2 hours one of my closest friends is

    moving to another side of the country with his sister who is like my best friend & it's tearing me apart knowing I'm not gonna see them as often they're both such great kids and good friends I love them like my second family they're so amazing I hate to see them leave but it's...
    Caine135 Caine135 13-15, M 2 Responses Jun 12

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    anasteel2 anasteel2 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 18, 2014

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    I made a mistake I told myself I would never

    make, I let someone else be my happiness. Now I feel like my world is being torn apart. I had never believed in love, and I had emotionally accepted that I would be alone for the rest of my life. He was so different though. He didn't judge me for my acting out, he didn't...
    Unbloomed Unbloomed 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 2

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    You have no idea what I see in my mind.

    What I see makes me mad. What I see bothers me and what sucks the most is that I can't do anything about it. And it is like it is on constant replay. What happens when this happens to Someone. And what happens when he see's her or thinks about her. And so he gets mad and does...
    Brandon15shawana Brandon15shawana 16-17, M 1 Response Jun 7

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    I have never been a normal kid,

    and high school is ripping the very fabric that holds my sad excuse for a life together to shreds. My awkwardness, inability to socialize, and confused sexuality are making me a prime target for bullying. My family isn't the most stable. I don't have many friends and I'm not...
    pizzafacedfag pizzafacedfag 16-17, M 1 Response Jul 9, 2014

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    I am broken. Now I am having a difficult time

    trying to pick up all of my pieces and putting them back together.. ๐Ÿ˜”
    SweetRose22 SweetRose22 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    they say, how can you hate yourself

    so much when they barely even know me and whisper , you are too young to be so sad when they read my writing and when i cannot bring myself to attend their parties, they laugh, why are you always tired but if they spent two minutes inside of my head, they would realize...
    ProfessorPsycho ProfessorPsycho 13-15, F 2 Responses Feb 4, 2014

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    suicidal, regretting the abortion

    and hating what my life is. feeling hopeless, ive been in a ward 4 3days on suicide watch. My friends are guilting me about being here, little do they know I'm super serious about wanting to die, as per usual they are ignoring me. I've decided to kill myself with my allergies...
    Anubis111 Anubis111 22-25, T 1 Response May 17

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    Again and again I just stare.

    I look past the glare. I look pass the superficial beauty. deep into my heart, and my duty? I am just as ugly and rotten as my heart. I try to find peace in art. but my life is like being a cart at Wal-Mart. I choose what goes in it. useful items that benefit. or junk and trash...
    Poeticdeaths Poeticdeaths 18-21, M 2 Responses Mar 5

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    trhsmh trhsmh 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 19

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    It Seems So

    I am struggling inside. I am fighting my negative thoughts and trying to find a good place, but Im having a really hard time. This is nothing new. Im always like this. Up and down, up and down. Just trying to maintain something that is okay. I am looking for a solution. A...
    soulrunher soulrunher 41-45, F 22 Responses Jul 12, 2013

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    I am totally down right now.

    I felt like a hopeless case. I felt like i have no one to talk with even though i have my family beside me.
    Pisces1991 Pisces1991 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 21

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    Struggling, it makes you stronger

    than what you already are. Everyone has days, weeks and maybe even months of it. Where your heart thrashes against your rib age threatening to break free at any waking moment, your lungs not knowing how to expand anymore. Fragile bones, sleepless nights and lonely days. Pain is...
    fwxo fwxo 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 23

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    For days I have been doing nothing

    but hiding my feelings and keeping everything bottled in. I'm so use to that because talking to people about my true emotions can be very hard. -- not being able to work, make money to help my home life and to help myself is my main issue. It's not as easy has getting up and...
    xMellowButterflyx xMellowButterflyx 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 11

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    Hang On.

    No matter how badly we feel, it is only for now. When in deep pain and confusion When in the depths of darkness and despair, it can be hard to remember there will be light again. There are so many lessons in the cycles of nature. Sometimes they may sound trite but truth is...
    BuddyBo BuddyBo 56-60, F 2 Responses Oct 9, 2012

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    I hate that i am bad at explaining how i feel

    and explaining my side of things because it always makes it seem like I am wrong or less intelligent.
    artsydarling artsydarling 18-21, F 2 Responses May 26

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    I'm lost and uninspired,

    I feel like I am gone, my body is here but my mind is wondering about life, I meet a nice girl, why can't we just be friends, why do I have a tendency to ask her out,I'm a monster I'm dumb I'm stupid and I can't get help, every one was right about me, I got mad because when...
    psychopuppet23 psychopuppet23 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 1

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    I'm ready to give up.

    .. ๐Ÿ˜”
    Soligem Soligem 22-25, F May 7

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    There is so much to do

    but I am weak and fragile. Lost to the winds of old, my strength is. Seeking tirelessly to find an anchor to call home. An anchor I cannot reach or even see. With time caring not for me but its own, I desperately grapple with the forces of my will to be in equilibrium. I'm...
    Aamulus Aamulus 18-21, M 7 Responses Jan 23

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    I really am I am falling apart

    as the minutes pass. I am aching from head to toe I can't sleep or eat I'm not living any more just simply existing. I'm sick of feeling this way I would give anything just to be able to stop crying for for a day and just feel average or normal or just to feel happiness or to...
    milichja milichja 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 4, 2014

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    hello darkness my old friend I'm back again.

    no sorry I'm not here to stay I'm just here to destroy my demons. I am my only enemy as there are people that are trying to make my life miserable they all have one thing in common, they all remind me of me. I glare at a mirror and I see my reflection ugly and corrupted...
    Poeticdeaths Poeticdeaths 18-21, M 2 Responses May 21

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    I am trying my hardest not to fall apart

    and break. Music can help, but not always what I need. If anyone else is going through this or can help me. I'd really appreciate the support. Love is the main point :(..
    M1TCH94 M1TCH94 18-21, M 1 Response May 31

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    Every day is another fake laugh

    or another fake smile. I'm so tired of it. All i want to do is cry and say how i'm feeling. But i know i cant, because nobody will care. Because they'll just think im a freak. I dont know how much longer i can keep faking hapiness...
    ItsPriscila ItsPriscila 16-17, F 5 Responses Jan 21, 2014

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    When you sit there in

    that classroom or the grocery store or just anywhere, just look. Take a moment to look at the people. Everyone in that room has something going on. Whether it's family problems or drug abuse or verbal abuse, they all have something. Maybe they have a song stuck in their head. Or...
    ImAlivingParadox ImAlivingParadox 22-25, F 1 Response May 12

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    I just got in a fight with my gf it didn't

    progress as far as it would have she keeps throwing the same thing at me the fact that I called her an over controlling ***** once the one time I actually stood up after taking the same crap from her so when she brought up the ***** thing I said everything that could be held...
    Corneredblades Corneredblades 13-15, M 1 Response Aug 10

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    Why Can't It Be Seen Easy.......

    I was told by a few friends that I am in my element when I talk about work and that I need to put that into my personal life.....  Problem is that in my life things aren't cut and dry like they are the machines. I love to work on a machine it is clear and it is supposed...
    mtvlm mtvlm 41-45, M 18 Responses Dec 9, 2009

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    Not only do I feel like a failure,

    I also feel so inferior :/ I feel so worthless and like I know nothing and that I'm never right about anything....just so inferior. I've never felt this way before. But a while back, I started developing a feeling that I suck and that I'm not wanted in life, even by my family...
    Soligem Soligem 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 17

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    loveiseverything18 loveiseverything18 18-21, F 2 Responses May 8

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    I just want to get better.

    It's really hard though and no one seems to understand that. I'm on the verge of breaking almost every damn day. I try to move past it and forget it all for a minute but then it all comes hitting me. I hate what I've done. I hate who I've become.
    EssSmith EssSmith 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 25

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    my sailor has been gone

    for almost a month at boot camp. I can't to go to his graduation because they're only allowing three attendants, which will be good mother, his father and his special needs sister. I was going to go anyways, but my parents told me no because they don't want me alone in a hotel...
    katielynn195 katielynn195 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 9

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    Identity

    Recently, a very good and trusted friend reminded me of a truth that I had forgotten: We are not our possessions, our job, house, spouse, or family. We are separate from all of that. We have an intrinsic value that we often forget to appreciate within ourselves. We have a...
    BozoBuckets BozoBuckets 51-55, M 1 Response Nov 28, 2012

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    I have a scary face. I wished I didn't

    but I do. Everywhere I go people sneer or rush to get far away from me. I always keep myself well groomed, spray men's perfume and comb my hair. But its all for nothing. Sometimes o cry myself to sleep thinking why is God punishing me so much. I dnt yarned to be loved, just if I...
    gibril0411 gibril0411 22-25, M 2 Responses Aug 2

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    Hi. I am almost divorced.

    Have kids. I do have a bf. We have been together almost a year. Some days I feel so lonely. I just want that everyday family feeling back, I had before my ex cheated and left. I love my bf but there are days I wish we were living together ect, then other days I'm like no way...
    happymom2