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I Am Struggling To Keep Myself Together

It's hard, considering the circumstances. 6,078 People

    artsydarling artsydarling 18-21, F Apr 25

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    I'm lying in bed... Thoughts running through my

    head... They don't stop... I can't find silence... I'm struggling. I need to find myself again. I feel like I'm suffocating. I'm in a miserable marriage. I know he resents me and pretty much hates me. At least that's how I feel or he makes me feel. We have two beautiful...
    MyLifeAsViolet MyLifeAsViolet 31-35, F 5 Responses Jan 23, 2014

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    Hang On.

    No matter how badly we feel, it is only for now. When in deep pain and confusion When in the depths of darkness and despair, it can be hard to remember there will be light again. There are so many lessons in the cycles of nature. Sometimes they may sound trite but truth is...
    BuddyBo BuddyBo 56-60, F 2 Responses Oct 9, 2012

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    Again and again I just stare.

    I look past the glare. I look pass the superficial beauty. deep into my heart, and my duty? I am just as ugly and rotten as my heart. I try to find peace in art. but my life is like being a cart at Wal-Mart. I choose what goes in it. useful items that benefit. or junk and trash...
    Poeticdeaths Poeticdeaths 18-21, M 2 Responses Mar 5

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    I'm ready to give up.

    .. ๐Ÿ˜”
    Soligem Soligem 18-21, F May 7

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    I wake up sad daily .

    .. I am in a sexless marriage I am now in my 40's I want to feel pretty again . I want a man to crave me I have so much to offer
    likemeforwhoiam likemeforwhoiam 41-45, F 6 Responses Mar 1, 2014

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    I am broken. Now I am having a difficult time

    trying to pick up all of my pieces and putting them back together.. ๐Ÿ˜”
    SweetRose22 SweetRose22 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    stress. stress. stress.

    and more stress. I can't live this way! I am losing myself and becoming miserable. I can't even appreciate the few good things that I have going on in my life because I am stressed. when I look in the morror, I can see how bad I look physically due to this stress.
    secretdestiny secretdestiny 18-21, F 1 Response May 11

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    Converted Converted 46-50, M Apr 16

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    Well. In 2 hours one of my closest friends is

    moving to another side of the country with his sister who is like my best friend & it's tearing me apart knowing I'm not gonna see them as often they're both such great kids and good friends I love them like my second family they're so amazing I hate to see them leave but it's...
    Caine135 Caine135 13-15, M 2 Responses Jun 12

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    I am totally down right now.

    I felt like a hopeless case. I felt like i have no one to talk with even though i have my family beside me.
    Pisces1991 Pisces1991 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 21

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    Hi. I am almost divorced.

    Have kids. I do have a bf. We have been together almost a year. Some days I feel so lonely. I just want that everyday family feeling back, I had before my ex cheated and left. I love my bf but there are days I wish we were living together ect, then other days I'm like no way...
    happymom2 happymom2 31-35, F May 19

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    Converted Converted 46-50, M Apr 21

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    What I want. I want to not go to school.

    I just want to chill watch movies and play my game. I want to get high everyday . I want to get crazy drunk. I want to poison my body. I want the poison to pollute my body and darken my spirit. I want to sit in that corner chair in a hazy room full of cigarette smoke and weed. I...
    Brandon15shawana Brandon15shawana 16-17, M Jun 7

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    Struggling, it makes you stronger

    than what you already are. Everyone has days, weeks and maybe even months of it. Where your heart thrashes against your rib age threatening to break free at any waking moment, your lungs not knowing how to expand anymore. Fragile bones, sleepless nights and lonely days. Pain is...
    fwxo fwxo 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 23

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    I am so very lonely. My husband had a total

    breakdown last year and tried to kill himself, horribly. Since then all of my friends have found excuses to cut me out. My husband had been my best friend but that person has gone now. Our good marriage is now in pieces. I can't talk to him and I have no one to talk to. His...
    rosadon rosadon 36-40, F 8 Responses Mar 1, 2014

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    I'm lost and uninspired,

    I feel like I am gone, my body is here but my mind is wondering about life, I meet a nice girl, why can't we just be friends, why do I have a tendency to ask her out,I'm a monster I'm dumb I'm stupid and I can't get help, every one was right about me, I got mad because when...
    psychopuppet23 psychopuppet23 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 1

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    You have no idea what I see in my mind.

    What I see makes me mad. What I see bothers me and what sucks the most is that I can't do anything about it. And it is like it is on constant replay. What happens when this happens to Someone. And what happens when he see's her or thinks about her. And so he gets mad and does...
    Brandon15shawana Brandon15shawana 16-17, M 1 Response Jun 7

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    I am trying my hardest not to fall apart

    and break. Music can help, but not always what I need. If anyone else is going through this or can help me. I'd really appreciate the support. Love is the main point :(..
    M1TCH94 M1TCH94 18-21, M 1 Response May 31

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    I Understand How You Are Feeling X

    Signed in tonight to see that almost all stories shared tonight are about people who are hurt, alone, sad, depressed and upset about something. I feel very upset at seeing this and remember how i used to feel 4 years ago when i was so alone i was also homeless and begging on the...
    Rocks08 Rocks08 22-25, F 3 Responses Dec 12, 2010

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    suicidal, regretting the abortion

    and hating what my life is. feeling hopeless, ive been in a ward 4 3days on suicide watch. My friends are guilting me about being here, little do they know I'm super serious about wanting to die, as per usual they are ignoring me. I've decided to kill myself with my allergies...
    Anubis111 Anubis111 22-25, T 1 Response May 17

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    So Sunday at work I blacked out,

    hit my nose on a shelf, and fell. My nose was bleeding and customers were horrified of course but when I blacked out I was still partially conscious. I was not aware what was happening though. I remember thinking when I hit my nose "Ouch! what was that?!" Then I hit the floor...
    artsydarling artsydarling 18-21, F Jun 16

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    Identity

    Recently, a very good and trusted friend reminded me of a truth that I had forgotten: We are not our possessions, our job, house, spouse, or family. We are separate from all of that. We have an intrinsic value that we often forget to appreciate within ourselves. We have a...
    BozoBuckets BozoBuckets 51-55, M 1 Response Nov 28, 2012

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    I have never been a normal kid,

    and high school is ripping the very fabric that holds my sad excuse for a life together to shreds. My awkwardness, inability to socialize, and confused sexuality are making me a prime target for bullying. My family isn't the most stable. I don't have many friends and I'm not...
    pizzafacedfag pizzafacedfag 13-15, M 1 Response Jul 9, 2014

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    Woke up this morning feeling

    so low. Feeling anxious and felt the rising panic inside. Wondering if I will ever know what it feels like to be loved and wanted by a Man. So tired of it always being one way. I give everything but it's never enough. Rejection always. So tired of it all.
    chrissie58 chrissie58 46-50, F 6 Responses Sep 23, 2014

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    Not only do I feel like a failure,

    I also feel so inferior :/ I feel so worthless and like I know nothing and that I'm never right about anything....just so inferior. I've never felt this way before. But a while back, I started developing a feeling that I suck and that I'm not wanted in life, even by my family...
    Soligem Soligem 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 17

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    Lesson From Pfophet Job's(peace Be Upon Him) Struggle

    Those afflicted with calamities and distress should remember the story of Prophet Job (Qurโ€™an calls him Aiyub). Ah! What a heart-melting story of pain and suffering, of patience and forbearance, of faith and gratitude, and ultimately of reward and success! ย  Prophet Job...
    sunshines333 sunshines333 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 20, 2012

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    hello darkness my old friend I'm back again.

    no sorry I'm not here to stay I'm just here to destroy my demons. I am my only enemy as there are people that are trying to make my life miserable they all have one thing in common, they all remind me of me. I glare at a mirror and I see my reflection ugly and corrupted...
    Poeticdeaths Poeticdeaths 18-21, M 2 Responses May 21

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    I Feel Like I'm Having A Constant Battle Against Myself...

    I've never really acknowledged this before, but I kind of want to now. It's getting old. I'm calm and collect on the outside but on the inside I just feel crazy. Like with my mom, on the outside. I show that I'm happy, even at times that I'm like whatever she's gone. But when I...
    Greeneyedandcurious Greeneyedandcurious 22-25, F Jul 23, 2012

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    loveiseverything18 loveiseverything18 18-21, F 2 Responses May 8

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    You don't know pain until you are staring at

    yourself in the mirror with tears streaming down your face, and you're begging yourself to just hold on and be strong. That is pain.
    Ana104 Ana104 18-21, F 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    anasteel2 anasteel2 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 18, 2014

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    I made a mistake I told myself I would never

    make, I let someone else be my happiness. Now I feel like my world is being torn apart. I had never believed in love, and I had emotionally accepted that I would be alone for the rest of my life. He was so different though. He didn't judge me for my acting out, he didn't...
    Unbloomed Unbloomed 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 2

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    my bullet... he is my exit from this pain.

    He cures all type of cancer and is very effective. He silences all the voices in my head. He brings humanity toward my nature. He saves me from my biggest and only enemy my self. where are you bullet my head wants you and it is time to end a problem... My knife my friend...
    Poeticdeaths Poeticdeaths 18-21, M 2 Responses Apr 14

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    Having a hard day. Had an anxiety attack again

    today for the first time in awhile and I did was I just to do back then I cut myself. I was in the middle of one of my classes and I just walked out after taking a razor blade from my tool box and went to the nearest bathroom. It helped my calm down but not I have a pretty bad...
    WhoseMe WhoseMe 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 14

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    I'm bored, life is boring,

    I stopped feeling sad, angry, and scared, I try to find joy but it seems that I can't smile, happiness is becoming strange to me, I just don't care anymore.
    psychopuppet23 psychopuppet23 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 28

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    Why Can't It Be Seen Easy.......

    I was told by a few friends that I am in my element when I talk about work and that I need to put that into my personal life.....  Problem is that in my life things aren't cut and dry like they are the machines. I love to work on a machine it is clear and it is supposed...
    mtvlm mtvlm 41-45, M 18 Responses Dec 9, 2009

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    I just want to get better.

    It's really hard though and no one seems to understand that. I'm on the verge of breaking almost every damn day. I try to move past it and forget it all for a minute but then it all comes hitting me. I hate what I've done. I hate who I've become.
    EssSmith EssSmith 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 25

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    I got drunk finally told my friend I'm having a

    hard time told her I'm suicidal and were probably both too drunk to remember tmr. . . Drunk writing this. Probably be interesting tmr . Crap. . . This sucks
    WhoseMe WhoseMe 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 21

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    For as long as I can remember I've never been

    comfortable in my own skin. Most of the little confidence I did have was shattered a few years ago, when the girls at my school started to bully me about how I looked. I felt, alone and they often isolated me from everything. So o began to isolate myself to save myself from any...
    Awhiteorchid Awhiteorchid 18-21, F 7 Responses Nov 22, 2014

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    Day By Day, Sometimes Minute By Minute!

    I struggle everyday to keep myself together. It's not pleasant to have all that I have to deal with and the pain that I must cope with also, is enough for anyone to lose their mind. I struggle each day, some so painful that I have to take them minute my minute, or hour by hour to...
    TwilightDream TwilightDream 36-40, F 6 Responses Feb 17, 2012

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    I really am I am falling apart

    as the minutes pass. I am aching from head to toe I can't sleep or eat I'm not living any more just simply existing. I'm sick of feeling this way I would give anything just to be able to stop crying for for a day and just feel average or normal or just to feel happiness or to...
    milichja milichja 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 4, 2014

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    Never...

    This story was inspired by Elie Wiesel, a survivor of the Holocaust. Never shall I forget the pain in my parents eyes when my sister was dying. Never shall I forget the fear of becoming "fat" resulting in starvation in 1st grade. Never shall I forget my innocence and virginity...
    DanniDarling DanniDarling 16-17, F Mar 4, 2013

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    But jerks lose power.

    If me helps others. EP Link
    Converted Converted 46-50, M Apr 23

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    I just want to scream.

    Even if i did i don't think I would be heard even then.
    artsydarling artsydarling 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 16

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    My Husaband Acts Like A 2 Years Old

    I am just so tired of his logic,When I told him he should stop driving so fast, and look at the speed limits. he said that I should trust him, and I insulted him! and I should know that he doesn't mean to kill us! I said accidents happen and we have the most road kills...
    LordVoldemort LordVoldemort 36-40, F 48 Responses Jan 25, 2010

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