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I Am Struggling With Being Gay

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,230 People

    Mom.

    I've tried to tell mom that I'M gay a couple of times before and (if you read my first story you know how that ended) it was so bad... So now I'M here... Three years after all that **** happened and we "Moved on"... My mom talks to me about girls... just to know if im dating...
    josean03 josean03 18-21, M 7 Responses Nov 14, 2013

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    I just had my first experience

    and it was with a man.
    Tom1429 Tom1429 31-35, M 5 Responses Apr 6, 2014

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    I come from a big Irish family

    and although everyone has been amazing about me coming out, sometimes, I wish I wasn't gay because it makes me think that maybe things would be easier. Idk. It could be to do with my mental illness too. I struggle with being gay because I'm scared about what people will say but...
    romanalanski romanalanski 18-21, F 4 Responses Oct 22, 2014

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    I Am a Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual But No One Can Know.

    For those who feel like they are uncool, no one knows them and they're just not one of the popular kids, I feel for you but then again I would rather put myself in your shoes than to live a life that I have right now where everyone surrounds me expect something of me or even look...
    confusion confusion 26-30, F 18 Responses Oct 3, 2007

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    Hi there. Actually I'm no longer struggling :-)

    I had a really really hard time but managed to get out of my depression with help of my best friend (and some professionals). I'm much stronger now, and want to use my experience to help others who are having a hard time at this age being gay. I'm a pretty good listener, got...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Oct 10, 2014

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    Im 19 . I Live in the middle east As you know

    middle east countries is strict with Gay rights . & Its 10 times harder to express your feelings . I have a Guy crush On A lot of Guys . I would like one Day in the Near future . Meet the soul of My life , & Move out to America . I want your Advices For me & Thank you
    lordeley952 lordeley952 18-21, M Dec 18, 2014

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    The stupidest girl in the world asked me "if

    being gay is so hard why don't you just be straight?" If only it was that easy!!!!
    Zaqhary Zaqhary 16-17, M 2 Responses Dec 1, 2013

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    So I'm not actually gay (I'm pan

    but whatever) but I'm scared to actually come out to my family. I mean, it's easier to tell friends or tell people online but when it comes to family it's really hard. Both my grandparents on my mother side are Cristina pastors and my grandfather on my dad's side is a Christian...
    Barakaflacka Barakaflacka 16-17, M 2 Responses Sep 6, 2014

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    Being gay is something

    that I just recently realized that I am. I wasn't one of those who thought I've been gay since I was four, it literally was something I just sort of realized. I never really thought about sexuality before. I never looked at either sex and teenagers are supposed to be horny...
    gamerboy2001 gamerboy2001 13-15, M 3 Responses Dec 2, 2014

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    Gay, Celibate, Christian Just Wanting To Find That Someone To Hold At Night

    I was raised in a Christian home, by two parents that were present in my life, and have been married for 20 years now and are very happy. I have never seen them fight once. I have a half-brother that is 5 years older than me, and we don't get along and never have. I have a step...
    jennings2012 jennings2012 18-21, M 23 Responses Aug 9, 2012

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    It's a process that everyone goes through

    if you lucky you accept it before you're 25, if your unlucky you'll go crazy at 45 when you have a wife and kids and wish you didn't waste all that time!! COME TO THE DARK SIDE - we have cookies! - message me if you want to talk guys. Zack 21 london.
    zacklengthorn zacklengthorn 22-25, M 2 Responses Jul 16, 2014

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    Never gonna find someone I love

    who will love me back. When they love me back, I don't love them. When I love them, they don't love me back.......what's the point?
    andrew24601 andrew24601 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 20, 2014

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    I am a bisexual female.

    I am also a Christian. I come from a Bible believing family and they are the most important people in my life. My freshman year of high school was when I realized that I was bi, but looking back on my childhood, I know that I always was. My junior year I met this girl who's...
    mn0528 mn0528 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 14, 2014

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    Small Town, Nothing In Common.

    All the gay guys at my high school well you can tell they are gay. I dont understand it. How come im gay but i dont even act it? I im glad i dont but I wish there were just more people like me where I live. If I said Im gay they wouldnt think that Im just a regular guy they would...
    tomtombear tomtombear 18-21, M 29 Responses Dec 2, 2008

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    I've know I am gay since I was about 13.

    I denied it even as I fantasized about gay sex. I have come to embrace being gay, it is all I have ever known. Still there is that part of me that wants wanted a relationship with a woman. I think it is was what comes from a relationship with a woman; a child. And yes there is a...
    Scott1954 Scott1954 56-60, M 1 Response Jan 13

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    I don't have the courage to bring home my

    partner, It could go ugly. Not that I have a boyfriend, to begin with, but contemplating the future sometimes is hurtful considering I don't have much inspiration or support.
    kiddishguy kiddishguy 26-30, M 2 Responses Nov 10, 2014

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    People always ask me.

    . "Why did you choose to be gay?" I would always reply "I didn't choose to be gay, if I could, why would I choose all this taunting and teasing?"
    austintsnelson austintsnelson 16-17, M 4 Responses Aug 4, 2014

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    I worked our I was gay at a later age,

    how anyone could believe that this life is a choice is beyond me, I hate the fact I'm gay, that my dreams of being a dad and having a family were stolen from me. What's even worse is that the gay community is even more judgmental and superficial the the heterosexuals that hate...
    pyroguy80 pyroguy80 31-35, M 4 Responses Jul 29, 2014

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    Hey! :) So yes as u probably had already seen

    im gay, well actualy im the only one who knows so i think it doesnt count... :p I fell deeply depressed some times because of this, im gay, i know it for sure, and im kind of...afraid to tell everyone because i dont know what can happen after that. The thing i love the most is...
    Bral05 Bral05 18-21, M 2 Responses Jan 5

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    Sometimes I wish I wasn't gay.

    There's nothing wrong with being gay but it's just hard I've recently been coming out of the closet but I haven't to my parents kus they don't accept me for who I am now let alone being gay And I start community college soon and how do I get into the dating world when I'm...
    Vaughn37 Vaughn37 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 16, 2014

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    I am terrified of discrimination

    for being gay. All I want is to be able to live my life without my identity experiencing so much hate. I feel like I have to lie about who I am until I feel safe and comfortable around people.
    ajusu ajusu 22-25, M Dec 15, 2014

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    I Blame You !

    Well my story is going to be long but it's not going to be dull i can assure you ! It all started when i was little i had friend who was my neighbour and we were like 6-7 , and he always wanted to touch me and experiment with me. I didn't seem to mind cause i didn't had anything...
    stormy366 stormy366 18-21, M 5 Responses Oct 29, 2011

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    Gay In Yemen

    This is a summary of my life till now, and almost every gay person who is living in one of the 7 countries which denies gay rights and perform death penalty on those who have sexual gay relations has the same life or maybe worse because of that: I am a gay Muslim, living and...
    yemengay yemengay 22-25, M 11 Responses May 16, 2013

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    I'm Gay And I Hate It!

    I'm a 25 years old gay guy. My first fantasy about males that I could remember was when I was about 9 years old, and my first sexual experience with a boy when I was 15 years old. I don't really know WHY I'm gay! Why I like guys and don't like girls? I have every right to know...
    sadness707 sadness707 22-25, M 31 Responses Nov 13, 2011

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    I'm out to my friends

    and everyone I know. If anyone asks my sexuality, I'd say I'm gay. But I'm not sure about telling my dad. He's very homophobic, and I don't want to be kicked out of my own home. I don't know.
    PFowler PFowler 16-17, M 3 Responses Sep 24, 2014

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    Life Is Weird

    Ok so I'm 18 and have been out to only my bf who is a girl and she is pretty gay friendly but yet again she was shocked and couldn't believe that I was gay. I know we all got issues in life, but sometimes I seriously wonder why was I randomly chosen to live the life a gay person...
    GG1234 GG1234 18-21, M 10 Responses Jan 26, 2011

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    Old Bent And Queer

    There is a lot of talent up town for the festival. All these fit dudes  in their twenties.Its depressing. Young enough to be my offspring and the parents of my grandchildren. Handy trick if you're gay. Two generations deserves an award. Or disqualification. Life just has a laugh...
    Pa1nsMcmurdo Pa1nsMcmurdo 41-45, M 4 Responses Sep 14, 2012

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    I don't understand today how being gay is truly

    accepted. Today the most acceptance is "I'm okay with yo being gay" or "I'm happy for you." True acceptance would be "so?" Only then is it truly acceptance. Because then being gay isn't different or weird. It's nothing different. It's just normal. It's insignificant.
    WrongfulAngel WrongfulAngel 13-15, T 5 Responses Mar 21, 2014

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    I know i am gay but i am just

    so scared to come out. I am afraid people around me will treat me differently. I have been around straight guys and i know how they make fun and ridicule gay people. I don't want to be treated that way. But i feel so lonely being in the closet and i felt i am wasting my time...
    davidnathan davidnathan 31-35, M 4 Responses Dec 5, 2013

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    I found out that I was gay in the middle of my

    teen years and feel comfortable with it, but it's been hard being myself because I haven't come out to my dad yet or my family because I don't know if they'd accept me being in a Christian lifestyle. I've come out to my friends and they thankfully have accepted me. Dating-wise...
    jamie1292 jamie1292 22-25, M 1 Response Aug 18, 2014

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    I hate who I am, I hate not having a choice.

    I hate that it feels like my life dreams of a family and getting married have been stolen from me. My attempts at trying to change this just keep failing. Most of all I feel venerable to the world where people hate you for being gay, judge you and believe its a choice. Why...
    pyroguy80 pyroguy80 31-35, M 3 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    Hello reader, So it's time

    for me to get personal about a subject that is so near and dear to my heart. Since I was a freshman in high school (I'm now a sophomore in college) I've known I was gay. I've never necessarily struggled with being gay, it's something I've always accepted, but I never "came out...
    oscaxr oscaxr 18-21, M 1 Response Dec 19, 2014

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    Homosexuals are EVIL!

    no offense but think of all the evil things we do! God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve! Repent before it's too late! I NEVER liked the gay life style never will! It's not right to like the same gender it's weird and it's wrong! I regret being born gay it has caused me...
    Abdulaziz94 Abdulaziz94 18-21, M 5 Responses Aug 3, 2014

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    I AM HIV+…AND I HAVE FOUND LOVE…ON EP!

    ! The last story I had shared was one in which I had posed a question…at what point in a relationship does sex become secondary? That was back in October. I had been in a relationship since the previous May with a kind hearted man who was good to me. I had originally been...
    Ralphsnt69 Ralphsnt69 46-50, M 1 Response May 2, 2014

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    ADVICE FROM WOMEN ONLY!

    ! PLEASE!! Okay, so I'm a gay male, but I don't think guys would understand this, I think this is more on the feminine side of topics... so yeah, so I got this silver bullet, and well, Ever since I got this vibrator I've seen nothing but condoms pop out at me in grocery stores...
    deademotion11 deademotion11 22-25, M 2 Responses Dec 5, 2014

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    I'm in love with a boy named Isai.

    Now since I'm young i obviously ways to go but he told this girl she was his present and that tore my heart. I didn't know what to think or feel but I'm suicidal.
    WorthlessXlove WorthlessXlove 13-15, M 2 Responses Jan 9

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    Here I am again complaining about being gay.

    Here I am again feeling like absolute ****. Here I am again wanting to die and end it all. Why do I like my own gender? Why do I find them attractive? Why do I think of them? Who on Mother Earth would even think about having sex with the same gender or even marrying one? WTF! I...
    Abdulaziz94 Abdulaziz94 18-21, M 5 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    Here's my story... Read it

    or not. I don't care. I'm gay but I'm also Christian and well that mixes as well as water mixes with oil. Especially when you have hard core Christian that you also love and grew up in the church. I know what's right from wrong and I try to suppress my urges and sometimes I...
    kp4w kp4w 18-21, M 7 Responses Aug 9, 2014

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    I was married and miserable

    as a closeted bisexual male. Got divorced, married a very understanding woman and now we have sex with each other and occasionally share a guy
    Metoo50 Metoo50 56-60, M 2 Responses Oct 21, 2014

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    How U Know If Ur Really Gay?

    i'm 14, and don't really like girls in that way and been thinking i may be gay because i like hanging out with guys and wrestling and horsing around would like the mess around with another boy, but i am scared about being gay because i live in conservative area and parents are...
    DaytonW14 DaytonW14 13-15, M 9 Responses Aug 20, 2012

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    Sometimes I just feel like it would be easier

    if I was straight. But then I realise how much I'd miss about guys if I was.
    Disqualify Disqualify 16-17, M 3 Responses Oct 10, 2014

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    I find it hard to deal with

    but i know i am well...gay I've already accepted this what im worried is that if come out my parents will have a fit cause of religious reasons when I consider myself and atheist but if im to come out about that it'd make things even worse.
    Joshuadd07 Joshuadd07 13-15, M 2 Responses Oct 7, 2014

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    The first time I knew I was gay was the age of

    11. The second I realised it I ran to my room and started crying until my eyes hurt, I remember this day so clearly because it was also the day I realised my father would never be able to accept it. As I was sobbing on my by bed my father came into my room and grabbed me by the...
    Takino Takino 18-21, M 5 Responses Apr 11, 2014

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    So I just turned 18 and am not to sure about

    anything. I need help and don't know who to talk to. You see ever since I can remember I have always been a little more on the feminine side. As a little kid I would dress up, more emotional, things like that. As I got older I realized that those weren't the typical things guys...
    umflic umflic 18-21, M 5 Responses Jan 9

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    What's a Guy to Do?

    Okay, Im sitting here writing this at 2:00AM. Im Pretty much loosing sleep over the fact that im Gay. Just seeing those three little letters on my computer screen is causing me discomfort. Im hoping that I can at least get some support or ideas on this site. Im still "...
    gallagher22 gallagher22 22-25, M 26 Responses Jan 6, 2009

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    A lot of people call me gay.

    I haven't come out of the closet. I just blow it off. And my friends stick up for me and tell people I'm not gay. It kills me that my friends don't know I'm gay but I can't come out of the closet.
    Zaqhary Zaqhary 16-17, M 3 Responses Nov 29, 2013

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    2013

    It has been a long time since the last time a shared a “story”, Yet, so many things have happened in my life (mostly good), that I have decided to once more sit down and share. Truly 2012 was a blessed year for me. I had my social “coming-out” as a gay man…and to be...
    Ralphsnt69 Ralphsnt69 46-50, M 8 Responses Jan 19, 2013

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    I wish I could just like women

    and be normal. Liking guys has taken me to the lowest point of my life
    lostsoul9011 lostsoul9011 22-25, M 4 Responses Mar 10, 2014

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    Don't Waste Your Life

    Being sexually attracted to men has been around longer than the bible and has been part of mankind since the being. Life is short. Live life to the fullest. Don't wait until you're older and regret wasting your youth. It is easier said than done, I realize that. But there is...
    soburied soburied 51-55, M 3 Responses Sep 21, 2013

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    I'm gay, friends and family know,

    I have a boyfriend, we live together, we're happy BUT I still find it hard when it comes to things like conversations in work. I always omit information that may give away I'm gay. I don't know why I do it, I'm ashamed I do it. Anyone else have similar struggles or use to...
    rb1987 rb1987 26-30, M Sep 3, 2014

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    I'm struggling about my sexuality.

    ... Is there anyone who can help me out from this plzzzzzzzzz
    jkmkjk jkmkjk 22-25 2 Responses Feb 23, 2014

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