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I Am Struggling With Being Gay

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,418 People

    2013

    It has been a long time since the last time a shared a “story”, Yet, so many things have happened in my life (mostly good), that I have decided to once more sit down and share. Truly 2012 was a blessed year for me. I had my social “coming-out” as a gay man…and to be...
    Ralphsnt69 Ralphsnt69 46-50, M 7 Responses Jan 19, 2013

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    The first time I knew I was gay was the age of

    11. The second I realised it I ran to my room and started crying until my eyes hurt, I remember this day so clearly because it was also the day I realised my father would never be able to accept it. As I was sobbing on my by bed my father came into my room and grabbed me by the...
    Takino Takino 18-21, M 5 Responses Apr 11, 2014

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    Hi, I'm a 19 year old lad,

    I have a girlfriend and well, a few weeks ago I slept with a friend of mine (A guy) And well, I loved it, but now I'm feeling guilty and would like to talk to some people who can give me advice. Message me :)
    LookingForAdvice90 LookingForAdvice90 18-21, M 1 Response Sep 8, 2015

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    I am a Gay Man from an Asian Archipelago.

    I am a Honor Student, A Licensed Teacher and an Heir to our Family Business. My Family is not really open-minded about Homosexuality. They have so much expectations from me. How will I come out? I do not like to hurt or disappoint my family. I love them so much.
    dbearbmax dbearbmax 22-25, M 4 Responses May 9, 2015

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    so I have a girlfriend

    and o love her for her bit I have no idea how to say that her parts make me feel sick because I'm gay. I love her tho she is the only girl I have loved and I've had s*x with a few guys but I didn't love any of them. I've been thinking of using viagra or similar for when we do...
    cjisbi cjisbi 16-17, T Dec 1, 2015

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    How U Know If Ur Really Gay?

    i'm 14, and don't really like girls in that way and been thinking i may be gay because i like hanging out with guys and wrestling and horsing around would like the mess around with another boy, but i am scared about being gay because i live in conservative area and parents are...
    DaytonW14 DaytonW14 16-17, M 10 Responses Aug 20, 2012

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    Small Town, Nothing In Common.

    All the gay guys at my high school well you can tell they are gay. I dont understand it. How come im gay but i dont even act it? I im glad i dont but I wish there were just more people like me where I live. If I said Im gay they wouldnt think that Im just a regular guy they would...
    tomtombear tomtombear 18-21, M 29 Responses Dec 2, 2008

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    I Am a Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual But No One Can Know.

    For those who feel like they are uncool, no one knows them and they're just not one of the popular kids, I feel for you but then again I would rather put myself in your shoes than to live a life that I have right now where everyone surrounds me expect something of me or even look...
    confusion confusion 26-30, F 18 Responses Oct 3, 2007

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    A lot of people call me gay.

    I haven't come out of the closet. I just blow it off. And my friends stick up for me and tell people I'm not gay. It kills me that my friends don't know I'm gay but I can't come out of the closet.
    Zaqhary Zaqhary 16-17, M 3 Responses Nov 29, 2013

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    I'm gay, friends and family know,

    I have a boyfriend, we live together, we're happy BUT I still find it hard when it comes to things like conversations in work. I always omit information that may give away I'm gay. I don't know why I do it, I'm ashamed I do it. Anyone else have similar struggles or use to...
    rb1987 rb1987 26-30, M 1 Response Sep 3, 2014

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    Is it ok to be gay? I'm mostly in the closet.

    I've grown up in a homophobic environment and although some would accept it, most would pity me & think it's disgusting. It's as if there's something wrong with being Gay. Not feeling very comfortable.
    AussieCharlie AussieCharlie 41-45, M 2 Responses Jan 6

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    I'm struggling about my sexuality.

    ... Is there anyone who can help me out from this plzzzzzzzzz
    jkmkjk jkmkjk 26-30 2 Responses Feb 23, 2014

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    Ok. So I'm 23 & just starting to come to terms

    with my sexuality. About 8 months ago, I finally started to acknowledge that I liked girls & allowed myself the space & time to come to terms with everything & engage with this identity. Once I got over the initial acknowledgement, I embraced it pretty fast. Everything finally...
    lostlamp lostlamp 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 20, 2015

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    I don't understand today how being gay is truly

    accepted. Today the most acceptance is "I'm okay with yo being gay" or "I'm happy for you." True acceptance would be "so?" Only then is it truly acceptance. Because then being gay isn't different or weird. It's nothing different. It's just normal. It's insignificant.
    LizzieWolf LizzieWolf 13-15, T 5 Responses Mar 21, 2014

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    I have a major problem with my best friend he's

    heterosexual and I'm homosexual but I have really gotten to know him over the past few months during lunch at school and I like him I guess. I'm stuck and confused about what I should do or want to-do. I'm not going to ask him out or anything but should I tell him I like him and...
    nathan5081 nathan5081 16-17, M 5 Responses May 7, 2015

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    Don't Waste Your Life

    Being sexually attracted to men has been around longer than the bible and has been part of mankind since the being. Life is short. Live life to the fullest. Don't wait until you're older and regret wasting your youth. It is easier said than done, I realize that. But there is...
    soburied soburied 51-55, M 4 Responses Sep 21, 2013

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    actually I feel bad for people

    who are struggling with being gay or just coming out because everyone's family is mostly ****** up I mean honestly if the “family” I have didn't accept me except my mom or dad I wouldn't give a **** so being myself was easy because I simply did not give a fuckk.. if someone...
    shiasan shiasan 16-17, M Jul 15, 2015

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    People always ask me.

    . "Why did you choose to be gay?" I would always reply "I didn't choose to be gay, if I could, why would I choose all this taunting and teasing?"
    austintsnelson austintsnelson 16-17, M 4 Responses Aug 4, 2014

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    One of a kind closeted gay man looking

    for his soul mate, a closeted lesbian. 100% discreet and 100% masculine. I am handsome, physically fit, athletic, genuine, outgoing, career oriented. I am 5,11 tall, 170 lbs, dark brown hair with green eyes. I am Caucasian, Italian background and was born and raised in NY...
    joesmithnyc joesmithnyc 41-45, M 2 hrs ago

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    Hey! :) So yes as u probably had already seen

    im gay, well actualy im the only one who knows so i think it doesnt count... :p I fell deeply depressed some times because of this, im gay, i know it for sure, and im kind of...afraid to tell everyone because i dont know what can happen after that. The thing i love the most is...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Jan 5, 2015

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    Sometimes I wonder as a closet bisexual how my

    life would have been if I was more open and dated more women. I feel if something happens to the relationship I'm in now I might want to live as a lesbian.
    Dahlia86 Dahlia86 26-30, F 3 Responses Oct 25, 2015

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    Gay In Yemen

    This is a summary of my life till now, and almost every gay person who is living in one of the 7 countries which denies gay rights and perform death penalty on those who have sexual gay relations has the same life or maybe worse because of that: I am a gay Muslim, living and...
    yemengay yemengay 22-25, M 15 Responses May 16, 2013

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    Hi, hope you are all well

    and healthy. I am 30 years old Indian Gay men & well settled Software employee and currently living in Hyderabad,India. I am single, not in a relation with any gay. Due to family and society pressure. I am looking for a decent educated understanding lesbian for MOC, Please...
    pranaireddy pranaireddy 26-30, M Jan 21

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    I'm not sure if I am gay

    or not, I've always wondered what it would be like being with a man and doing sexual things with a guy.
    iheroone iheroone 22-25, M 4 Responses Sep 25, 2015

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    I wish I could just like women

    and be normal. Liking guys has taken me to the lowest point of my life
    lostsoul9011 lostsoul9011 22-25, M 4 Responses Mar 10, 2014

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    So, after some thinking,

    I'm going to take the next 2 1/2 months and be completely non sexually or romantically involved. Not that I would be involved with anyone and not tell them my situation first. I think that time will help me see a lot of things more clearly and just find myself again. I really...
    RobertE22 RobertE22 31-35 1 Response Apr 25, 2015

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    I'm Gay And I Hate It!

    I'm a 25 years old gay guy. My first fantasy about males that I could remember was when I was about 9 years old, and my first sexual experience with a boy when I was 15 years old. I don't really know WHY I'm gay! Why I like guys and don't like girls? I have every right to know...
    sadness707 sadness707 22-25, M 36 Responses Nov 13, 2011

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    I know i am gay but i am just

    so scared to come out. I am afraid people around me will treat me differently. I have been around straight guys and i know how they make fun and ridicule gay people. I don't want to be treated that way. But i feel so lonely being in the closet and i felt i am wasting my time...
    davidnathan davidnathan 31-35, M 4 Responses Dec 5, 2013

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    It's a process that everyone goes through

    if you lucky you accept it before you're 25, if your unlucky you'll go crazy at 45 when you have a wife and kids and wish you didn't waste all that time!! COME TO THE DARK SIDE - we have cookies! - message me if you want to talk guys. Zack 21 london.
    zacklengthorn zacklengthorn 22-25, M 2 Responses Jul 16, 2014

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    Ok so it's hard for me to expect myself

    as being gay because I don't know what I am there are days I really like girls and there are days I really like boys most of the time I like guys though and it's hard for me to find a relationship to be in because I'm not out as being bisexual if that is what I quote on quote am...
    fiftyshadesoforange fiftyshadesoforange 18-21, M 1 Response Oct 23, 2015

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    I don't even know where to start

    and that's exactly how I feel. I've been saying for the past two months that I don't want a relationship, only to realize that I do, it's exactly what I want. I meet these guys and I want it to be just me and them, but no relationship. News flash, to me, I can call it...
    RobertE22 RobertE22 31-35 2 Responses Apr 2, 2015

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    Hi there. Actually I'm no longer struggling :-)

    I had a really really hard time but managed to get out of my depression with help of my best friend (and some professionals). I'm much stronger now, and want to use my experience to help others who are having a hard time at this age being gay. I'm a pretty good listener, got...
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Oct 10, 2014

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    Life Is Weird

    Ok so I'm 18 and have been out to only my bf who is a girl and she is pretty gay friendly but yet again she was shocked and couldn't believe that I was gay. I know we all got issues in life, but sometimes I seriously wonder why was I randomly chosen to live the life a gay person...
    GG1234 GG1234 18-21, M 8 Responses Jan 26, 2011

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    So I'm sleeping in my new apartment

    for the first time tonight. I miss my family, I see them almost everyday but it's not the same as living there. I miss the comfort of my wife. I miss being with my children and not having to leave to go "home". This isn't home, I want to go home. I brought my sons teddy...
    RobertE22 RobertE22 31-35 3 Responses Apr 19, 2015

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    I'm 31 years old, and

    for as long as I can remember I've been dodging the fact that I'm at least bisexual or gay. It's taken up so much of my strength and, looking back, has shaped so many of my decisions, whether they big or just everyday interactions with people. I've come to a critical crossroads...
    thanks4listening thanks4listening 31-35, M 5 Responses May 9, 2015

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    The Tough Guy.

    I was that guy. The one trying to be tough, trying to be anything but gay. I knew 100 slandering gay jokes, called every "weak" person a *** or a c0ck sucker. It was so intentional that I must have been hiding from my self. I was hiding. These days I am still hiding but at least...
    adamrising adamrising 41-45, M 5 Responses Mar 11, 2013

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    I've been out for a little under 3 months

    and have had sex with one man. I used a condom, but did give him oral. He called me on Friday and told me he had both a positive and negative test for HIV. I got tested on Friday and found out today that the test was negative! I thank god for a second chance. I know I'll...
    RobertE22 RobertE22 31-35 1 Response Apr 20, 2015

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    How to come out? when you really love your

    family and friend and be afraid about what could they said. but you don´t want to lose them sorry for my english, I speak spanish.
    ThEonlyBoY ThEonlyBoY 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 17, 2015

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    I'm 26 years old and just came out to my best

    friend well only friend about 4 months ago. Before that I did not really think much of it, I always thought to myself that I'll take it to the grave and no one will ever know. but ever since I told him (he was very accepting which surprised me) I thought I would feel good, like...
    uddon uddon 26-30, M 5 Responses May 3, 2015

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    I hate that I'm gay. :(

    and I hate that I'm alone because I can't come out. If anyone needs anyone to talk to, I'm here.
    willnevertell07 willnevertell07 26-30, M 2 Responses May 8, 2015

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    Ugh I can't live like this anymore.

    I can't take it. I'm a closeted gay/bisexual guy and most of my family is conservative and homophobic (due to their so called christian values and beliefs). I need someone to talk to because I have no close friends that I hang out with at my college. I love the school I'm at but...
    GCassr22 GCassr22 18-21, M 2 Responses Jan 26

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    I live in a homophobic household/am bullied at

    school. and I want reassurance that there is nothing wrong with me, I know there isn't but after years their words seep in and make me feel ashamed of liking girls. I just want to feel normal and not like a freak anymore.
    whyaretherenousernamesleft whyaretherenousernamesleft 18-21, T 2 Responses Sep 29, 2015

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    I still dont feel comfortable in my skin.

    I feel so different still..even though my sexuality isnt usually an issue with people.
    jtymez4 jtymez4 26-30, M 1 Response May 19, 2015

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    First of all, can someone else start posting

    here too, I'm starting to look whiney, lol. So it seems like my life is an exercise in Murphy's Law as of late... So the guy I slept with a few weeks ago (I used a condom) told me, for sure now, that he found out he was positive for HIV. So I've already been tested and it was...
    RobertE22 RobertE22 31-35 3 Responses Apr 24, 2015

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    I just had my first experience

    and it was with a man.
    Tom1429 Tom1429 31-35, M 6 Responses Apr 6, 2014

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