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I Am Suffering With Borderline Personality Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 39 People

    Caged. Heavy; light; pounding; relaxing;

    broken; glued. This is what goes on inside her head, because this is who she is; a girl diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. She never knows what to expect; never knows when a trigger is going to come, but when it does, it comes in at full swing. Trigger.... Result...
    danielle18 danielle18 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 9, 2014

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    I have borderline personality disorder.

    I was diagnosed in June 2013. I am totally blind. It's like an emotional roller coaster. I struggle with cutting... I have suicidal thoughts when the despair is to much to handle. This is a debilitating disorder.
    angel199221 angel199221 22-25, F 1 Response May 10, 2014

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    Recent BPD Diagnosis

    I am currently living at home with my parents, struggling through each day of my life. I work at a gynecology office full-time, and I am no longer enrolled in school. I still struggle with eating disorder on a daily basis, but my self-destructive behaviors have morphed into other...
    lindseyymc lindseyymc 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 2, 2013

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    Ah!

    I get contradicted. Told off. Criticised. Belittled and shouted at. He tells me I can't dress my self properly and that he's embarrassed to be seen with me. He tells me I'm a 'dud' girlfriend, and that I'm not like other females. He says I act like a child and that I suck all the...
    Waitingfornow Waitingfornow 22-25, F Jan 7, 2013

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    i dont know what to say im worn out

    and all i feel is pain im so depressed that i dont want o socialixw i cant even rember what i did a minute ago im so sick and fricken tired of this sick illness i think my sympmtons are getting worse i cant stop eating i just dont wan to go on anymore not fair its just not fair...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Jul 23, 2014

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    I would like to create an open chat with people

    with the same or similar problem. Anonymity will b highly respected. Ill commence by saying that i suffer from BPD n it is difficult to deal with on daily basis.
    barceloner barceloner 36-40, M Apr 17, 2014

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    needing to vent im feeling

    so fricken angry i wont open up im tired of the pain i cant cry desperate for love i keep looking for a home who knowmaybe i nned attention i feel illi dont know ifi want to go on anymoreim a fat ugly disgusting pig nothing helps whats the point im tired tired i feel nothing i...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Sep 4, 2014

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    i feel like i dont wan to go on anymore

    everuday im sick and fricken tired of fighting this im not healthy my stupid pshe nurse changed my meds a while back and has left me crying everyday stupid jerk my life is a mess im so fat yet i get up everday is a battle i feel like i dont know what i beliee iwhat is wright or...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Aug 30, 2014

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    I just recently found out I had this I knew

    something was wrong with me for quite awhile but I thought i was bipolar come to found out its my emotions i cant cotrol i go from sobbing in tears to pissed off there is no sad and mad it sucks i hate this i no longer have a family cause of this and almost lost my bf aswell...
    Alwaysandforever29 Alwaysandforever29 18-21, F 5 Responses Dec 10, 2013

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    Who Am I?

    I am lost in my own mind, have been searching for me my whole life. I look in the mirror and see a person I don't know. She is a very beautiful ugly person is all I know. She has never been touched by a loving hand as she chose a man with no emotions. I have enough for the both...
    mywaves mywaves 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 10, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Just have a break up with a sincere good guy, but I have a borderline and trust issues. I know I must not have pity to myself, instead, I need to cure my behaviour better. maybe I...
    candraayu candraayu 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I love a man with this disorder. He is on medication but I still find him exhausting and impossible to get a long with... I'm loosing an uphill battle.. May be time to cut ties...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 9

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    One of the things that bothers me the most is that now that I know I have BPD, I blame almost everything on this disorder. But it shouldn't be like that. I'm just tired of walking...
    nuttyduck nuttyduck 18-21, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    In high school I had friends who took Sociology, and they would tell me that they thought of me when learning of BPD. It never phased me, until meeting my Borderline neighbor, and...
    grindhound grindhound 22-25, T May 12

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    My husband and his oldest son both use marijuana to self-medication their Borderline Personality. But honestly, it does nothing for the anger, rage, and other negative behaviors...
    SaraIsBroken SaraIsBroken 31-35, F 2 Responses May 22

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    I realize now how much having borderline personality puts a damper on your relationships. It makes everything feel so unstable. And it's like I am scared to lose anybody in my...
    KairiKipling KairiKipling 18-21, F 1 Response May 18

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    I lash out for hours at a time, then I might get depressed for hours at a time. others I'm really happy. sometimes super excited over nothing. I started looking at symptoms of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 2

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    Do you ever just read a book about whatever you have and feel that much more upset thinking "That's really great. I am literally everything this thing is talking about from what's...
    EngulfingBreeze EngulfingBreeze 22-25, F 49 mins ago

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    My borderline is getting worse these few days.I have sort of over dosing on anxiety pills.Between the trade off of being in extreme pain,and being somewhat okay I chose whatever...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 2 Responses May 17

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    Alright, where to begin? I hope only those with BPD read this. It's incredibly incredibly insensitive and very damaging to a Borderline person when someone who doesn't understand...
    Vaecia Vaecia 22-25, F 6 Responses May 5

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    my borderline seems to differ in alot of ways from the experiences I'm reading. i have other issues that help to form this mess in my head but i dont identify with the normal...
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F 2 Responses May 11

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    Saw the movie shame.That is exactly how it is being borderline.I think I am somewhere in between.Being Demisexual,empath and borderline is a strange **** up of emotions.You have...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 2 Responses May 8

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    Ah,so shared vision turns out my founder is delusional.He wants this grand idea of a vision to be executed and cant even put a ******* business plan. Meanwhile he is derailing all...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 1 Response May 13

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    Is anyone else a "quiet borderline?" I'm an introvert, which makes it kind of hard to relate to other bpd sufferers sometimes. Many people (especially family members) underestimate...
    SlothSweater SlothSweater 16-17, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    I think this disorder will cause me to be alone forever.
    SoulSearcherLover SoulSearcherLover 18-21, F 2 Responses May 11

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    my bpd has been diagnosed as dissociative disorder now. i have been through the winner the last two weeks. everything seemed fine with smoking weed even the va doctors said it is...
    LITVET LITVET 41-45, F 1 Response May 14

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    I smoke copious amount of marijuana to help my anxiety, BPD, and eating disorder every day. I wish there was another option that was just as effective.
    forshewasacoffin forshewasacoffin 18-21, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    i feel like i cant go on i have apart in me well the depressed kid has rejected everything doesnt have the will to go on life is passing me bad i look for a home i never had i dont...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F May 2

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    I was recently diagnosed with bpd, I'm 29, and I feel like I've been lost for a better part of my life. I'm hoping that things will start to get better as I continue with treatment...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses May 3

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    im feeling ereally funny and sick inside i feel like im not here im in my head i feel likei want to go off the riken deep end i cant feel my emotions ive beena cting fun all day no...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 2 Responses May 3

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    About a year and a half ago I went through psychosis for about four months after using drugs. I'm embarrassed about a lot of the stuff I thought/ said/ did during this time...
    gabbii22 gabbii22 31-35, F 2 Responses May 6

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    In the past month, a lot has happened. I'll warn you in advance that this is a long post, but I think it might help some of you to feel less alone. I hope it does. So. I dated a...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 6 Responses May 10

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    i am afraid of people...being around them, talkng to them... is anyone else this way? if so...how do you deal with it?
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F 2 Responses May 15

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    I recently started therapy up again and that seems to be helping tremendously. Socially and mood wise I have been a lot more outgoing and grounded This is such a change from the...
    poodahpop poodahpop 18-21, T 1 Response May 17

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    Okay,so saw fatal attraction,and let me put out some stuff,as a bpd sufferer myself,I will never do,and it is very unlikely most average bpd people might. 1.I love animals...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 3 Responses May 22

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    If you're in Northern New Jersey and have a high degree of empathy, join my meetup group. Http://meetup.com/NNJ-Empathy-Meetup/ We already have over 40 members. Our next Meetup...
    Roxvox Roxvox 31-35, F May 23

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    If you're in Northern New Jersey and have a high degree of empathy, join my meetup group. Http://meetup.com/NNJ-Empathy-Meetup/ We already have over 40 members. Our next Meetup...
    Roxvox Roxvox 31-35, F May 23

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    for those who have read my other experiences, let me share this with you. i had to give up the weed. first off, i am a recovering alcoholic with two years sobriety and used weed...
    LITVET LITVET 41-45, F 1 Response May 23

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    Does anyone think that the songs don't leave me by pink and blank space by Taylor swift have the characteristics of someone with bpd?
    Lostinabigscaryworld Lostinabigscaryworld 18-21, F 1 Response May 24

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    THIS IS MY STORY OF SELF CURED BPD Firstly, not long ago, I wouldn't believe that statement either! And honestly, i may be wrong, or I may never have been BPD. I may be right, but...
    Iamacontradiction Iamacontradiction 36-40, M May 24

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    I get into so many fights with my good friends - like yelling at the top of my lungs fighting. My temper/desperation for love and approval are a horrible mix.
    SoulSearcherLover SoulSearcherLover 18-21, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    I'm in the hospital again after another suicidal freak out last night. My bf restrained me from overdosing. He knocked on my sisters bedroom door and said he needs help because I'm...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 6 Responses May 2

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