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I Am Suffering With Borderline Personality Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 39 People

    I have borderline personality disorder.

    I was diagnosed in June 2013. I am totally blind. It's like an emotional roller coaster. I struggle with cutting... I have suicidal thoughts when the despair is to much to handle. This is a debilitating disorder.
    angel199221 angel199221 22-25, F 1 Response May 10, 2014

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    i dont know what to say im worn out

    and all i feel is pain im so depressed that i dont want o socialixw i cant even rember what i did a minute ago im so sick and fricken tired of this sick illness i think my sympmtons are getting worse i cant stop eating i just dont wan to go on anymore not fair its just not fair...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Jul 23, 2014

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    Who Am I?

    I am lost in my own mind, have been searching for me my whole life. I look in the mirror and see a person I don't know. She is a very beautiful ugly person is all I know. She has never been touched by a loving hand as she chose a man with no emotions. I have enough for the both...
    mywaves mywaves 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 10, 2013

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    i feel like i dont wan to go on anymore

    everuday im sick and fricken tired of fighting this im not healthy my stupid pshe nurse changed my meds a while back and has left me crying everyday stupid jerk my life is a mess im so fat yet i get up everday is a battle i feel like i dont know what i beliee iwhat is wright or...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Aug 30, 2014

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    Caged. Heavy; light; pounding; relaxing;

    broken; glued. This is what goes on inside her head, because this is who she is; a girl diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. She never knows what to expect; never knows when a trigger is going to come, but when it does, it comes in at full swing. Trigger.... Result...
    danielle18 danielle18 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 9, 2014

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    Ah!

    I get contradicted. Told off. Criticised. Belittled and shouted at. He tells me I can't dress my self properly and that he's embarrassed to be seen with me. He tells me I'm a 'dud' girlfriend, and that I'm not like other females. He says I act like a child and that I suck all the...
    Waitingfornow Waitingfornow 22-25, F Jan 7, 2013

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    needing to vent im feeling

    so fricken angry i wont open up im tired of the pain i cant cry desperate for love i keep looking for a home who knowmaybe i nned attention i feel illi dont know ifi want to go on anymoreim a fat ugly disgusting pig nothing helps whats the point im tired tired i feel nothing i...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Sep 4, 2014

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    I just recently found out I had this I knew

    something was wrong with me for quite awhile but I thought i was bipolar come to found out its my emotions i cant cotrol i go from sobbing in tears to pissed off there is no sad and mad it sucks i hate this i no longer have a family cause of this and almost lost my bf aswell...
    Alwaysandforever29 Alwaysandforever29 18-21, F 5 Responses Dec 10, 2013

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    Recent BPD Diagnosis

    I am currently living at home with my parents, struggling through each day of my life. I work at a gynecology office full-time, and I am no longer enrolled in school. I still struggle with eating disorder on a daily basis, but my self-destructive behaviors have morphed into other...
    lindseyymc lindseyymc 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 2, 2013

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    I would like to create an open chat with people

    with the same or similar problem. Anonymity will b highly respected. Ill commence by saying that i suffer from BPD n it is difficult to deal with on daily basis.
    barceloner barceloner 36-40, M Apr 17, 2014

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    Related Experiences

    I got out. Best decision of my life. Every situation is different, and ending a marriage (particularly when there are children involved, which there are for me) is a serious...
    ericseviltwin ericseviltwin 31-35, M 5 hrs ago

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    I'm actually not quite sure if I do or not, but when I was still 17, my psychiatrist said she wanted to diagnose me with Borderline Personality Disorder after I turned 18. I've...
    Boulier Boulier 18-21, F 4 Responses Apr 10

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    This is my first time posting on EP, so bear with me. Also, keep in mind that doctors and therapists are not 100% of my BPD diagnosis-- I also have dissociation, ADHD, and panics...
    DepressedDemigod DepressedDemigod 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 1

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    Hey guys, I'm new here, so I'm not exactly sure how this goes.. But I figured I'd give it a shot. Here's a little bit about me: My name is Sara, I'm 19 years old, I live with my...
    darling1925 darling1925 18-21, F 3 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Let's create a resource thread. So many times I feel isolated and don't know where to turn for help. Maybe we can all band together and share our resources for getting treatment or...
    IamLisaSimpson IamLisaSimpson 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 1

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    Has anyone ever been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, but actually have Borderline Personality Disorder?
    StrangeDisaster StrangeDisaster 18-21, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    people around me don't understand how horrible this disorder is. Borderline personality disorder can be and is debilitating. I'm tired of being different. I'm tired of being...
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I am a 39 year old female,. I have boarderline personality disorder, major depressive disorder(diagnosed at 10) adhd (diagnosed at 38), ptsd, anxiety, a past history of anorexia...
    sofullofcyn sofullofcyn 36-40, F 1 Response Apr 17

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    Borderliners?Wanna try this? I am gonna make this the new script for my diary entries format.So I will start filling these,instead of the pain I normally do.Oh,and the flow thing...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F Apr 15

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    Argued with my mom today... She´s in another country with my brother... and she left me here... It´s hard comunicating with her, she doesn´t get me... My family should be close...
    DiamondArmada DiamondArmada 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 8

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    I have BPD. Usually I'm quite depressed or apathetic. Occasionally, for no reason, I will wake up feeling great. Energetic, joyful, smart, and insightful. Music has deeper meaning...
    caly94 caly94 31-35, F 4 Responses Apr 12

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    Someone should check my posts and their dramatic change of emotional stand for explanation of borderline pd.I am much better now.And while my emotional self is still cringing at...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 14

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    I'm at a weekend away with a club I'm part of, and someone when they were drunk said "No one likes you Amber, you should just leave." I know that if I think about this logically...
    Ambernonymous Ambernonymous 18-21, F Mar 30

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    most of the ppl who say the are bpd and not been diagnose by a professional. ive taken a lot of test , and it comes up that i have strong indicators of it , they confirmed i do...
    WhiteRice14 WhiteRice14 18-21, F 4 Responses Mar 31

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    It's just not getting easier. How can do many amazing things be going on in my life yet I am still consumed with depression, sadness, lonliness, and feeling like trash?
    aligain aligain 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 31

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    i woke up to early 300pm. now im tired i feel like im in lala land i must be shut off noytthing matters pain pain thats all i know abuse is all i know abusr to me with food over...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 4 Responses Apr 5

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    I need to try to stop having "episodes" when I'm with my friends... but also getting to the point where I don't give a crap what they think anymore... If I'm gonna be alone anyway...
    Yu12 Yu12 26-30, M 3 Responses Apr 8

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    hello im feeling dark miserabkevery lonely my mind im tired of fighting this i dont know how to cope with this i think i feel angry im not sure whant to be set free my angry...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 1 Response Apr 12

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    i feel liikei just dont want to goon anymor ei stayed up late just so i couldnt face the day i feel tired all the time in such a dark spot but im stubborn and wont open up i feel...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Apr 18

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    Does anyone else constantly feel like you're not good enough, not important enough, not loved enough when you're in a relationship, even if the person you're with does all they can...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 12 Responses 3 days ago

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    im feeling really funny i dont feel real like im just a body around walking around my apartment so tired as usual going to bed is this being disonnected it freaks me out my mond...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 10 hrs ago

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    Paxil, effexor, abilify, zoloft, lamictal... The list goes on. None of them worked. Then I started using recreationally, and realised it treated my symptoms better than any and all...
    dontyouunderstand dontyouunderstand 18-21 3 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    im not sure why im writing everydat i find is hell and struggling i do not feel connected i have therapy to day at mental heath i dtread going ouy there is in a badf s[pot im...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 2 Responses Mar 31

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    Or do i. EP Link
    convertihd convertihd 46-50, M Apr 1

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    Is there anyone here from Essex in the UK at all?
    TheIceQueen2012 TheIceQueen2012 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 12

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    I was having a great day at work and coming towards the end of the day I started feeling pathetic knowing that once I left work I'd have no to call or text me. Most people...
    aligain aligain 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 13

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    We fight every night for something. When the sun sets were both the same. Half draped in the shadows. Half burned in flames.
    JohnVBlackburn JohnVBlackburn 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 14

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    I'm in treatment but it's a struggle
    hollaem hollaem 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 16

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    i cant fet out of this my mood is so low i hate this im in a dark painful place i just dont wan tto do this anymorei dont really wan tto talk to anyone i feel so lonely i got up...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F a week ago

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    hello good morning im so struggling im so fricken depressed it isnt funny i just cant take it any more i dont wan to live like this my mood is so loww i feel likea kid that cant...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Or honesty. EP Link
    convertihd convertihd 46-50, M 6 days ago

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    i need to vent although doesnt seem to help i feel like i just go on one more day i had to do some errands im a stubborn person so i close myself off i have no strengh to do this i...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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