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I Am Suicidal

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 606 People

    Why Do So Many People Want to Kill Themselves?????????????????????????????????????????????

    I wrote this for a 16yr old on this sit but I thing I need to share it with every one! Why would you want to do that? There are some many people out there that love you and would be very hurt if you did. Suicide is one of the most selfish things anyone can do. Your young and...
    nb0898 nb0898 26-30, M 17 Responses Dec 24, 2007

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    Losing Myself

    I have been dead for years already. I've killed myself hundreds of times in my head. I'm not courageous enough to actually do it; I wish I really was. My family thinks I'm the worst daughter/sister. They say what about the one's you've left behind? They will hurt and this will...
    link1309 link1309 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 31, 2013

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    Trapped...

    My depression, my darkness is consuming all the positive things about me that anyone might have found appealing in the past. While I am definitely feeling suicidal, and I actually CRAVE the feel of blades on my wrists and warm blood running down my arms....I also know I...
    craZnaomi craZnaomi 36-40, F 4 Responses Apr 21, 2009

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    I Used To Be...

    I had a rough childhood, who hasn't. It was frustrating to understand others and deal with others who acted so foolishly and made me pay for their idiocy. I love myself so much and I felt that suicide was the only way to save myself from that pain. Sometimes, I still think it...
    Zealot362 Zealot362 18-21, M 1 Response Feb 28, 2012

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    Depression Is Killing Me

    Depression is a horrible thing. It's a killer. It can make you completely lose your mind. It can make you hate the world. Hate yourself. Hate others. Hate those who care and those who don't. It ruins all the good things. Makes them almost non egzistant. All you see when you look...
    thequeenofpain thequeenofpain 16-17, F 6 Responses May 30, 2012

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    im really finding it difficult,

    I dont know what to do, I was in hospital for 4 weeks and t didnt do anything to help me, my diagnoses is schizophrenia because of my PSYHICosis. I cut, I feel sick, I want to end it but cant, im forced to take medication, I hate it
    AliceeGeorgia AliceeGeorgia 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 28

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    Every minute of everyday,

    i think about killing myself, something always gets in the way and stops me. Sometimes i get urges to do it so bad, yet i keep failing. I dont see a point in carrying on in life, i'm worthless, meaningless and hopeless. I'm going to die anyway, why can't i just die now?
    deleted deleted 26-30 Feb 6

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    I contemplate it at every moment he makes me

    feel so dumb stupid pitiful and worthless most of the time it's like I don't exist unless he needs something I just can't bring myself to try it again because of my daughter I've tried overdosing and I slit my wrists I tried hanging myself but I always fail
    tor1medina tor1medina 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 18

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    I don't belong to a world full of life I don't

    belong in a world where people breathe I am not worthy of breathing If i'm not worthy of being here the place where people live Black and silence A place which is full with nothingness That's where i belong in a world full of nothing Only one way to get there That peaceful...
    Banabear Banabear 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 21

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    I can't take this anymore.

    I spent the day with my little brother. But i felt numb. I couldn't focus on his chattering, I couldn't place this feeling. It wasn't until I was alone in my room that i felt the true emotion behind the wall. I felt the pain. My lungs hurt as they struggled to let air in. My...
    c0nfus3ds0ul c0nfus3ds0ul 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 13

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    I came home today. I spent 2 days in a hospital

    because i tried to kill myself. It wasn't even my goal that night, i just cut a little too deep and a little too far up my arm. I didn't mean to
    3Words4You 3Words4You 18-21 1 Response Jan 18

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    Stop Invalidating Suicidal Thoughts As Selfish

    I've been noticing many comments about suicide being selfish, so I'll just re-paste my thoughts on that here.  I am not advocating suicide, I am just saying that you shouldn't invalidate why people have suicidal urges.  You're not helping anyone by invalidating...
    whengodlaughed whengodlaughed 18-21, F 5 Responses Apr 4, 2010

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    To BE Or Not To BE

    My life is shattered and suicidal thoughts are now a part of my daily routine, like taking a shower. I’m trapped in a life that has no meaning. I just took tequila shots (at 9am) bc waking up, now, isn’t pleasant – so I’m typing this under the influence. I’m used to...
    OvOBrien OvOBrien 26-30, M 4 Responses May 9, 2013

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    Dilemma

    I have wanted to go through with my plan for the past fews days, but then I have thought about how my family and the guy who I love (We're only friends at the moment even though we love each other. It's complicated.) would react. My suicide would crush them. What can I do with...
    SomewhereTomorrow SomewhereTomorrow 18-21, F 6 Responses Feb 25, 2011

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    The Suicide's Argument

    The Suicide's Argument     Ere the birth of my life, if I wished it or no No question was asked me--it could not be so ! If the life was the question, a thing sent to try And to live on be YES; what can NO be ? to die. NATURE'S ANSWER Is't returned, as 'twas...
    rosesencha rosesencha 70+ Jul 22, 2007

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    I struggle with depression daily.

    I haven't told anyone about my feelings. I haven't shared about feelings with my support group or even written it down in my journal, because I was afraid to face it. I didn't want anyone else to know. My husband & I are struggling financially. We're nearly 50k in debt, not to...
    AdoreWyoming AdoreWyoming 31-35, F Aug 8

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    So tonight im drinking.

    People over here. Live my life try to pretend everythings fine. Thats what youre supposed to do right pretend? Thats what everybody else does. I just want to be a part of something in my life. The rest seems to have passed me by. I just realized theres no im suicidal...
    shinjorai shinjorai 36-40, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    Looking for a suicide partner

    or someone to shoot me in the heart with a gun. I really want to die. I'm 28, good looking, but I have been thinking of it for years. I'm dead serious. I was hoping for nembutal but I really dont have money for that
    exslut exslut 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 21, 2013

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    ...

    i been having suicidal problems since i was younger because i been through so much, and i was mostly alone and never share things about my problems with anyone, always moved around from places/schools so much never really had close friends. i didnt grow up with my mom for a while...
    ladyluck492 ladyluck492 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 16, 2010

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    The Mirror

    I'm supposed to be dead. Am I dead? But I'm still breathing now. What happened? I thought I had already slit my wrist that night. I'm sure that I've been gone for seconds. But why am I lying on this hospital bed right now? Do I want to live? There, my boyfriend came through...
    hellsdevil hellsdevil 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 15, 2009

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    Please Answer!!!

    What stops you from killing yourself?What has helped you hang onto life?Thanks x
    JustKeepFighting JustKeepFighting 18-21, M 7 Responses Jan 29, 2012

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    KimTin33 KimTin33 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 27

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    ask for help right..?

    how? how does one asks for help?
    Lenam013 Lenam013 18-21 2 Responses Mar 23

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    The Living Hell Of 'Suicidal'!

    Years back, I was a suicide case, determined to kill myself. For years, I lived in the depths of that terrible black abyss, so deep, so ghastly that no one can reach out and touch you. That place where your answer to all that happens is that my children, my wife (husband), my...
    Qagidi Qagidi 46-50, M 3 Responses Jan 6, 2012

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    Done

    No fancy words or deep explanations just I am suicidal I dont have the energy to explain.I cant go on like this....
    Blind Blind 36-40, F 7 Responses Aug 10, 2007

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    This should be my last entry on here

    if everything goes as planned. I truly managed to alienate myself, I got rid of my friends so they could no longer tie me down and I'm now ready to embrace death. Wish me luck fellow EP members, it has been a rocky road, discovering who I am, how normal I am...thank you :)
    zelllambert zelllambert 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 16

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    I have been feeling very hopeless,

    and miserable. I usually have a deep seeded pain, but nothing I haven't been able to manage. I am a very strong person, and have been through things that people couldn't even imagine. I have never struggled to keep it together as much as I have been recently. I just got married...
    Thinkofme Thinkofme 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 5

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    This is the ending of a story I wrote

    for one of my classes. The beginning was happy with no signs of this comming. Misty arrived home later from a wonderful night out with her friends. She loved to hang out with her friends, because she always felt so alive; they alway had so much fun together. Misty felt...
    KimTin33 KimTin33 22-25, F Jun 20

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    Hardyblue Hardyblue 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 28

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    Gimme Heroin

    I tried shooting up dope the other day. Maybe a week ago. IDK. Point is: I didn't shoot up to get high. I was checking to see if a heroin OD was a legit way to die. Every time I try to suicide my "fight or flight" reactions kick in and keep me alive. It's bullshit but it's human...
    Sneckz Sneckz 26-30, T Nov 30, 2013

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    Never Ending

    Im 26, and the first time I tried to kill myself I was 8. I hung myself but my mother found me too early. Ever since I could remember I preferred being in isolation than have a human around me. My family is awesome, I just never understood the point of living. The doctors say its...
    sawaj19 sawaj19 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 25, 2013

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    Past The Point Of No Return...

    Ever get to the point where there is no return. That no matter how bad you want things to be okay, and no matter how bad you don't want to hurt anyone, there is just no way of going back to that place before it got all dark and scary? Ever get to the point that, even if somewhere...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Jan 9, 2011

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    bla im just so tired of life no one in my

    family can relate to what i go through in my head my dad is just happy all the time or not happy i wouldnt know cause its the same mood all the time i dont think he knows what being depressed or lonely means hes like a robot my moms a social butterfly my brothers dont suffer...
    briinthezone86 briinthezone86 26-30, M 1 Response May 25

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    I have made multiple attempts to kill myself,

    no-one will care when i'm gone, i don't know whether i'm just bad at killing myself, or i'm secretely too scared to do it.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses May 4

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    Almost Time To Leave.

    My birthday is in January which means my time is almost up. Seems fitting to leave on the day you were born. Course only one person who actually knows me personally knows and that was because we had an argument and I snapped and said it. But I think they doubt it because they...
    NonExistX NonExistX 31-35, M 4 Responses Sep 27, 2012

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    Lets Help Each Other Die!

    Im super annoyed with my life and feel like people are selfish for wanting me to stay alive. No one wants to watch my kids because I dont work. I am applying for social security. I feel laughed at for my life being such a failure. I am applying for ssi so I think I have given up...
    SoDangCute SoDangCute 26-30, F 6 Responses Oct 16, 2011

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    I Want to Die.

    No one understands..I just want so badly to be dead.
    ticktickboom ticktickboom 16-18, F 4 Responses Dec 13, 2007

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    i fantasize about how i am going to kill myself.

    i go into every detail. i crave the feeling of excitement when i think about it. of course, i can't go through with it. i think of my younger siblings when i feel as if i will act on it. i don't want to put them through the pain of having lost someone close to them. but i want...
    emmers95 emmers95 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 28

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    Battling To Live

    I should be happy and want to live. I have 3 grown children and 3 precious grandchildre. My husband is so very loving, I could'nt ask for a better man to share my life with..But the deep pain inside keeps me wanting to die...clouds my life and makes me want to hide away from...
    toomuchtobare toomuchtobare 61-65, F 5 Responses Oct 6, 2012

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    I've always been suicidal,

    since i was 12, something always happens to make me worse. I suffer from mental disorders which ruin my life, i can never hold on to a relationship. I feel everybody hates me 24/7. I got so much abuse in my childhood, i struggle with trusting anyone.
    Imbroken21 Imbroken21 18-21, M 2 Responses Feb 9

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    I Remember When I First Contemplated Suicide.

    It was when I was 12. My mother had gone out to chat with neighbors and I had wondered what will happen if I hang myself from the wardrobe? What would my mother do when she discovers my body? It was the later thought that day that stopped me from going through with it. The...
    wastedtears wastedtears 26-30, F 2 Responses Sep 25, 2013

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    I Want A Partner.

    I would like to die. I am in Michigan. Anyone else ready to go?
    droplikehot droplikehot 22-25 1 Response Dec 2, 2013

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    I'm finding a less painful way to go,

    and all I can do is hope it works. My reason for wanting to die is because my life is up. There is no more reason for me to live. No one needs me here and I'm tired of looking like a fool in front of those I love, and in front of strangers. I'm getting more and more crazy and...
    mystory37 mystory37 36-40, F Mar 13

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    Why I'm Not Dead

    The only reason i'm not  dead yet.there are still people who love me.i could die , but that would just take all my pain and put in on my loved ones.i can't do that.they already have there own pain!how can i knowingly give them mine  just so i can be free?so i'm alive.and will...
    jillianlarson2011 jillianlarson2011 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 25, 2012

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    When I was seven I began to cut.

    then one day when I was eleven I cut so deep that I severed all my veins. I am lucky to be alive. My best friends saved my life don't ask how. Not that I fear for myself...but I hate other people's bashings and shots fired. I feel unworthy and hated. I hate peace and love. they...
    Moonywolf Moonywolf 13-15, F 1 Response Apr 30

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    Reset Button?

    You know, I always thought that if I ever contemplated suicide that I would be in a state where I would be paralyzed with depression. But now that I am thinking about it that just isn't the case. I guess I'm kind of down, I've definitely felt better before. But I'm not drowning...
    sensesfail sensesfail 22-25, M 5 Responses Apr 24, 2011

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    Anastas17 Anastas17 18-21, T 2 Responses Jul 27

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    No matter how much counseling

    or support I get, the feelings never go away. They just come back stronger every time. I lost all my friends and family besides my boyfriend and every day he is driven further away by my loneliness and fear. I've moved between 3 countries in 1 year and every week and month I...
    asphodelwild asphodelwild 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 18

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    ...

    It's not that I want to die... I just don't see a point in living anymore. I'm sure that such a statement sounds at least somewhat unappreciative, seeing as how I am a single white female living in the suburbs of the US. From an outside perspective, my situation probably seems...
    OblitusAuri OblitusAuri 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    For Too Long.

    On March 31, 2004, I went to sleep feeling perfectly fine. On April 1, I woke up wanting to die. I was thirteen. Four years later, the feeling hasn't gone away. I'm afraid that one of these days, I'll forget what I have to live for. One can only take such intense sadness for...
    SheistheLorax SheistheLorax 18-21, F 13 Responses Jan 4, 2008

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    And I don't know how to stop the thoughts.

    They're taking over my life. I'm beginning to think that people may opt for suicide as a logical means of escaping these horrible thoughts and dreams. I sure want to...
    niceusername niceusername 22-25, F 1 Response May 27

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    Suicide

    I have attempted suicide several times, sadly I am still here. People dont understand how much I hate this life. I cant see the point why any human being is on this earth . Its a nightmare. my motto is YOU are born   YOU die and inbetween is MISERY. I wont be happy...
    angel7 angel7 41-45 2 Responses Mar 2, 2008

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    Coming Alive After 25 Years Of Darkness

    I suffered from severe depression for more than 25 years. I first threatened suicide when I was, maybe, 7 or 8. I made my first, really serious suicide attempt at 13. For many years, the only thing I really wanted in the world was to be dead. People who don't suffer from...
    mistercrayon mistercrayon 36-40 1 Response Aug 2, 2013

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