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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 11,399 People

    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 25 Responses May 6, 2014

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 17 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    Well ladies - I am happy to announce.

    I am no longer a statistic. My MM has left completely, has filed, has moved out, has moved into a new place, has a new number, has placed the W in a mental facility/rehab for her drug usage, has informed both his family and hers, and has asked me to be his real deal girlfriend...
    AdelW AdelW 22-25, F 7 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    Be careful the trolls are out today.

    Just ignore and block. Hope everyone has a great day 😃
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 1 day ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 54 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Ok. I just have to tell everyone how great this

    guy is. Yesterday, as I told you he stopped on his way home to give me a heart shaped cookie he had just bought for me. Saw him this morning for hugs and he gave me some pizza that he made last night. He came over for "lunch" with a bouquet of flowers and we made love for...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 18 Responses 1 day ago

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 28 Responses Oct 23, 2014

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    How can two people fit

    so perfectly together and not have the chance to actually BE together? ...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 7 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 49 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    This is for everyone hurting.

    This stopped me cold today.
    pinkismysignaturecolor pinkismysignaturecolor 36-40, F 2 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    does it happen to anyone else

    that they catch themselves saying APs name out loud with a sigh randomly throughout the day, not quite loud enough for anyone else to hear?
    findingpeace6 findingpeace6 26-30, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    Today's my mother's Birthday,

    not only did he remember, he called her. I love him!!!
    Doloboo85 Doloboo85 26-30, F 26 mins ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    I've been quiet because I have not had too much

    to add. Everything with my MM is wonderful. He's been so supportive, loving, attentive and wonderful. Annnnnndddd....we have our second overnight planned tonight! Champagne, dinner, hot tub......bliss. xo
    tauriangirl tauriangirl 36-40, F 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 154 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    One thing I love about my relationship with MM

    is that we are so supportive of one another. We've both had problems recently and have turned to one another for love and support. He is always the first person I tell when anything good or bad happens. And vice versa. And I realise it's such a long time since H and I were...
    daisyblue222 daisyblue222 36-40, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 16 Responses May 4, 2014

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 41 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    So as part of the d day revelations - W tells mm

    that over the last few months ( while he's been seeing me) she has fallen in love with him again. Although she is highly religions (JW) she said that she was thinking of getting a tattoo of his name and their anniversary date as an affirmation of her love for him. I really don't...
    NNIP888 NNIP888 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 81 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    It's been a week today

    since MM ended it. This is so hard, the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, trying to let go of the one you love. If it wasn't for a certain few ladies on here, I think I'd be in alot worse shape, you guys are my rock, and I love you for it. Thank you for listening to me...
    Blueeyes65 Blueeyes65 46-50, F 9 Responses 1 day ago

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    It's been 8 days since MM ended our 2 1/2 year

    relationship in an email. In the email he said he would no longer respond to any communication from me. He already sent me a letter in the mail. I received it on Tuesday. It was a short, insincere paragraph about how he hopes someday my hatred turns to forgiveness so I can truly...
    onmyowntwofeet onmyowntwofeet 36-40, F 2 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 67 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 2, 2014

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Its been a while since I've posted on here.

    I like to reread my old post to see the progression of my relationship with him and my state of mind while writing them. I'm very happy and comfortable with my relationship with him right now. I'm with him everyday minus Saturday and though I'm not necessarily proud of what I...
    SweetAsSugar10 SweetAsSugar10 22-25 2 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    That feeling you get

    when he is laying next to you and you can hear him fall asleep and can feel his body relax..... bliss.....
    NNIP888 NNIP888 22-25, F 3 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    It's only been 2 days

    since I ended things with MM, but it feels like 2 weeks. I am on autopilot around the kids, keeping it together. I'm just so tired but can't sleep.
    typist123 typist123 36-40, F 2 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Ok, my life has changed - to better -

    and here are the three things I have done that could have contributed! So I will post them just in case they help anyone else: 1) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33r8WZ_qm0Y This song is representing exactly my feelings towards MM - of course he's not the lord, but the rhytm...
    monty1212 monty1212 26-30, F 1 Response 17 hrs ago

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    I have been reading and rereading posts here.

    Those of you who are in a good place I am truly happy and envious of the place you are in. I wish I could pull something out of this experience, turn back time, not say what I said 10 days ago. Shoulda , coulda, woulda. Second guessing every word in the last two weeks. Hoping...
    kringle6691 kringle6691 46-50, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    Things have really evolved.

    What does it mean when he says things like I wish I were cuddling with you. I love when you just lay your head on my chest. I really did get into this with intentions that are nothing like how it turned out.
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 2 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11, 2014

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    Hmmmm.... So this is pretty amazing stuff.

    . Who would have known that's how I would feel today. We must have moved a universe, make all the black holes disappear and perhaps cause a global warming by couple of degrees. (sorry penguins, totally unplanned, I promise) the stars have aligned tonight, at some even much deeper...
    monty1212 monty1212 26-30, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

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    Have been Talking to A guy from last year so

    for over 6 months Now , He does have a Girlfriend and Me a boyfriend , we Gym together everyday , and see each other everyday , but he does get mad when i dont go to the gym and dont reply , why?
    flower242 flower242 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    In a sense... I am. I continually sleep with my

    ex while he's with his on and off girlfriend. He always says the sex with me is better but he's still doing both of us. And he's always looking for more girls... I know I should leave him alone. All I really want is to understand him. He wants love and I feel like I could help...
    IvyRed15 IvyRed15 16-17, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 88 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    I made plans to hang out with my ex-AP next

    week. :-/ He was emailing me about work today and added that he hoped I was doing well and that he hadn't seen much of me recently so we should catch up. I'm worried that we can't be "just friends" and that going out for dinner and drinks might trigger something more. On the...
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 78 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 46 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 50 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    Loving my man and accepting he is with another

    woman is one thing. But to be put down by him when all I want us to hear from him through text and to see him is a big NO NO. I don't mind and care what people say about me. I don't even want to think how negatively people will think about me knowing he has a gf and yet here I...
    VicMarie VicMarie 36-40, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    Mm initiated a lot more contact

    than usual this week. I'm enjoying it but spending the evening over analyzing why.
    ladylove0113 ladylove0113 36-40, F 17 hrs ago

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    Sitting with family at dinner on Sunday,

    my brother, without knowing it, gave me a pretty good idea why men who are miserable in their marriages stay. After 13 years and one eight year old boy with his crazy wife, my brother finally is divorced. He is dating my best friend and is very happy for the first time in ages...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 31 Responses Sep 23, 2014

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 17 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    Good Morning Ladies, Wishing you all have a

    blessed day today, I have read many of your post yesterday and seen so many women in pain for 1 reason or another while dealing with the MM. Listen despite the position we play in the MM lives try to remember there are so many other options out here for us. If one fish don...
    Imbrokenhearted Imbrokenhearted 36-40, F 1 day ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 101 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    Just had a nice little snuggle with my love bug.

    He stopped over before going on his trip. It's so crazy, but I love falling asleep to the sound of his snoring! I missed him so much- I'm glad we are both being supportive of one another's choices to go visit family on our break and not pouting (too much). I jumped right into...
    lostanddistraught lostanddistraught 22-25, F 1 day ago

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