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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,413 People

    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 44 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    Why do all the haters say you're always going

    to be second choice? Maybe we are second choice when he "has" to go home but in reality we aren't second choice in his heart or his mind. I can almost promise that he's thinking about me more than his wife. I can almost promise his heart is starting to lead him else where and...
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 90 Responses Aug 10

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    Anyone stayed friends with their FB

    or lover after it's ended?even if just friends years before that.
    Pommy8 Pommy8 51-55, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    I just saw him after a week long breakup (our

    first real attempt to stay away) That man makes me so happy. Just thinking about his smile make it so I can't stop smiling. I wish there was an easy answer. A way that the reasons we tried not to see each other would be happy to see us together.
    trigger03 trigger03 22-25, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 40 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    My birthday is in 2 days,

    and I have hit an all time low. All I wanted for my birthday was to spend time with my MM, go away for the weekend, make love under the moonlight but since I recently broke up with him, that wont happen. Today's mood: depressed, sad, lonely, angry. What is a woman to do, when...
    4everhislady 4everhislady 36-40, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    Had a brief but somewhat interesting convo with

    the single guy...granted it started off with his usual "muah" messages back and forth and was driving me nuts! Anyway...he asked how was my wifey life going...my response..."just waiting for you to sweep me off my feet". Him: So I can make you my wifey! So I just said "Well...
    nolasanchez30 nolasanchez30 31-35, F 5 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 37 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    A weird couple of days with limited contact.

    Purposeful by myself mostly I would say.easing myself in gently to the point where I can let us go and retain a normal friendship maybe. I doubt it would even be discussed. Since we don't so the lovey thing anyway-would be just another day but with no plans to meet. It's kinda...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 41 mins ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 22 Responses Jul 30

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    To all of you ladies in limbo - just remember

    this... Some of you will make it and be a couple, some of you won't. Only you really know what's going on. It's great to come here to get advice and opinions. There will be haters... Just think what it means to show those haters your achievements. This journey isn't for the weak...
    RedHotPepper RedHotPepper 26-30, F 3 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I need a bit of a distraction at the moment,

    so I thought I would share a little bit of my backstory. WARNING - THIS IS LONG. I thought I was fairly happily married. Been with my husband since I was 19, and we had two beautiful daughters. About 4 years ago, my husband started acting very oddly. Visibly troubled by...
    greeneyes2232 greeneyes2232 41-45, F 3 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    After a very in depth talk on Monday,

    I have seen a huge change in my MM. He is making more of an effort to do little things that shows he cares. It feels amazing!!! He texts good morning and good night. He calls me after he leaves a site and on his way to the office (his idea not mine). He sends me a pic of him...
    Dreamingofhim0514 Dreamingofhim0514 26-30, F 2 hrs ago

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    sunset4ever sunset4ever 46-50, F 6 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I got a surprised text very early morning

    coming from Angeline.. I named him Angeline xxxxx not to arouse suspicious. When i see that name my heart skips faster and inpatiently to read.. Disappointed it didnt come from him.. It was my ex colleague. It is day 7 today.. Leaving from US on sunday and touch down on monday...
    prettygoddess prettygoddess 26-30, F 8 hrs ago

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18

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    Had a breakdown & txt him "F*&$ you.

    .stay with your wifey"....I already feel bad about it. I'm not sure if he'll even respond tonight...I'm just so pissed at him for acting like it's not ok when I txt him
    Sidechic79 Sidechic79 31-35 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 29 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    My Secret Gold Coin

    You don’t know it, but I think of you as a beautiful, precious, shiny gold coin that I keep secretly hidden in my pocket. I feel happy knowing that you are in there, but unhappy knowing that you have to stay hidden. I wish I could show you off to friends, but they wouldn’t...
    jenn80 jenn80 51-55 18 Responses May 23, 2013

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 70 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 3 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    My dad passed away in April of lung cancer,

    he had been very sick for awhile so there was lots of work to do the last few months on their house. My mom doesn't have much money (cancer treatments wiped them out) a lot of family and friends helped get the place in shape and to thank them for their kindness she's invited...
    ynoTme83 ynoTme83 26-30, F 2 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    It was so nice to get my AP alone

    for a while today. It's so tough to sit through boring meetings all day, giving each other the look, but unable to touch each other. Half the thrill is the secret though.
    surfandturf surfandturf 36-40, F 15 hrs ago

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    So I let him have it today.

    .....I really did. He came over to my desk today to chat, asked me what's wrong and why I look "fed up" and I just shrugged. Then he spent 30 minutes talking and being friendly and breaking my heart..... So I messaged him and asked him if he really doesn't realize that the...
    PrincessLolita PrincessLolita 26-30, F 4 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 20 Responses May 6

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    I am so mad he lied to his w

    and I don't know why. I knew he wasn't going to leave...... But I am mad he lied. If hurts that he reduced what we had to a one time thing that meant nothing......and I can't seem to get passed it. Every time I think about it I cry...... I don't understand
    PrincessLolita PrincessLolita 26-30, F 8 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Please, do not stop posting.

    ... I may not be the best person to make this request because I have only participated on the forum for just a few months. But I am so glad I had a place to go. I can not begin to tell you how supportive you ladies have been during my time of heart aches, up swings, troubles...
    saiyagyrl saiyagyrl 36-40, F 4 Responses May 26

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 14 Responses Jun 2

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    Haven't heard from him today,

    and of course it has to happen on the day that I woke up with a sore throat, and could really use some cheering up. :( I want to be able to have him here to hold me when I'm sick, and take care of me. Sorry for being a suck. lol.
    Katsstory Katsstory 36-40, F 2 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Today was one of the best days of my life!

    I know I sound like a teenager, but SWOON. He took me to a little private beach, brought my favorite beer, and we spent the entire 8 hours *which flew by* enjoying the scenery, each other (sexy time the whole time pretty much), and a delicious IPA. He was mine for the whole day...
    lostanddistraught lostanddistraught 22-25, F 13 hrs ago

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    I was the other women

    for a year but now I am the wife. We will be celebrating our 3 year wedding anniversary soon. We were both married to other people when we met. We were both in bad marriages. We are both so much happier now. If anyone wants to hear my story I am happy to share.
    magic2929 magic2929 46-50, F 17 Responses Apr 29

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    Today i am angry. Driving-in to the office

    this morning i thought, "oh how i miss him. i love him so much, it hurts." and then i thought.... "i wonder if he's missing me. i wonder if he thinks of me when he hears a song." unfortunately for me, i know he does. i wish i knew he didn't. it would make it so much easier, to...
    Grace7277 Grace7277 31-35, F 7 mins ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 17 Responses May 4

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    I am going insane. I heard from him yesterday

    said he missed me but nothing since. So I sent him a quick note today telling him that I missed kissing him. No response.... But here is where it gets insane and where I am freaking out. Long story short. W's brother and I work for the same large co. Odds happen to be we were...
    geminigirlnextdoor geminigirlnextdoor 41-45, F 2 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I love someone I can't have.

    What he wants and what he can have are two different things. I don't know what to believe. I think my time with him was just an experiment or a way for him to escape his life. Maybe he loved me. just not enough. He made me feel whole. sexy. funny. smart. wanted. I adore him. I...
    geminigirlnextdoor geminigirlnextdoor 41-45, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 47 Responses Feb 16

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 142 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 162 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    Please let me go. Stop trying to keep me with

    tiny little subtle things like calling me my pet name. Because when I blatantly tell you I miss you and want you I get ignored. Why do you do this to me?? When we're together it's like the world doesn't exist and you look at me with love. Then when we're apart you contact me...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 1 Response 17 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 80 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    I'm having a really hard time.

    The more time I spend with him, the more I hate waiting. The nights are the worst, I haven't slept well in God knows how long. I've spent nights crying until 5 in the morning. It also hurts that I don't have anyone to go to. I can't go to a friend and cry or be held. This is not...
    StuckInEternity StuckInEternity 18-21, F 2 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    Since I see him at work everyday & we spend

    lunch together we don't usually txt when he goes home. But lately he's been texting & I'll txt back. We today I txt saying " miss you already" he responded almost 2 hours later saying " I was sleep..that's not good...I'll txt you later" Meaning she could of picked up his phone...
    Sidechic79 Sidechic79 31-35 6 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 68 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    So he told me that he can't go to this wedding

    either he backed out of the one in june and I had even bought his ticket home he was gna meet my family well idk why just he wasn't out of the house and he couldn't go 400+ down the drain Now he doesn't know until the wire about this wedding and I said forget it and he knew...
    ap05 ap05 26-30, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    Things I don't miss from my affair.

    .. 1. Waiting for my phone to ding 2. Lying to spouse about where I am going 3. Making sure I erase texts 4. Time 5. Mind control that the affair holds not mm 6. Questioning of myself and actions 7. Guilt not for the affair but for my husband and his wife 8. Time 9. The panic...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 12 Responses Apr 27

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 16 Responses Apr 19

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    To the OW who are waiting

    for their MM or are on a break or just bring friends with your MM. If you want to go on a date with someone do you tell your MM? Does he want to know? If you tell your MM that you are/want to see someone else casually is it just to keep things honest and open? I'm seriously...
    JulyBug JulyBug 36-40, F 7 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I saw him today. And last night.

    And all weekend and every day last week (except Tuesday) . And he asked to take me to lunch tomorrow. This is kinda weirding me out. It's very new. It's fun...I adore him and every passionate, interesting, funny, stimulatimg, titillating moment together. I just try not to...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 1 Response 11 hrs ago

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