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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,016 People

    It's been a long time

    since I posted here. Last time I did, my affair ended and I was struggling with feeling inadequate compared to his wife. Four months after things ended, I got a letter in the mail from him saying that he had an accident and it made him reevaluate everything. It led to us...
    inaraserra inaraserra 31-35, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    Here on EP I met another 'other woman'

    and we clicked. Almost a year ago now and we talk every single day. Well yesterday we travelled the country and met half way for the first time an had an amazing weekend away together! Lots of good food, drinks, dancing and laughs! Best friend for life!! Just thought I would...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 13 Responses Apr 19

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 55 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    It happened. The fight they had last night was

    her trying to suddenly re-engage. She said she made a counseling appointment for 8:45 am today. He said he wasn't going to go. Remember, she hasn't been in 5 weeks. The argument continued. She said that she thought everything was going great. (Old patterns for them). He told...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 50 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    I am the other woman

    and really I ask many of you OW....is it all worth it....my situation is different than many....I am the reverse....my MM wants to get married...buy a house...totally in love with me....leaving his wife....the list goes on...usually its us woman that are hanging by the string...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 12 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Day 3 of the break Even

    though I initiated the break, I'm surprised he let it happen. I've heard from him once, but he just sent me a song, nothing else. Even though I said I'd call him Sunday, part of me wonders if I even will. If I can go a week without talking to him, then I'm stronger than I...
    macwellgirl macwellgirl 26-30, F 3 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I haven't posted here in a long,

    long time. Mostly it's because I had a hell of a D-day in early February. My H discovered the affair, confronted me & threatened to send his proof to MM's wife. I use the opportunity to end my marriage. And so did MM. But, we did not end it to be with each other. We took...
    crazycontrolled crazycontrolled 36-40, F 24 Responses Apr 30

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    It's quiet. We've texted.

    Talked on the phone twice. I am stressed by his situation. It's not mine. It's his. I went through my separation alone. Completed divorce papers on my own. Now he's in the mix of it and I'm trying to be gentle and listen. He only wants me to listen... I wasn't ready for this...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 2 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    Well, I'm not shocked.

    More resolved. I broke NC in less than 24 hours. He got the message and stayed away to "respect my wishes" then when I crack and call him he says I dumped him. So for someone who's never had an affair, he knows what no contact means. Is this all a game for married men. No matter...
    2loveornot2love 2loveornot2love 46-50, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 27 Responses May 6, 2014

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    Trying to navigate a relationship with a man

    who is an emotional blackmailer, even for the sake of a future relationship for him with the kids, is killing me.. Yes I'm talking about the ex. Everything I try to do to be nice, to keep things friendly, he takes as a sign I want to be back with him, but then nothing I do is...
    ElsieJay ElsieJay 41-45, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 15 Responses Mar 21

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    I talked to him on the phone tonight,

    he got off work at 12:30 am and phoned me. I am currently at my parents for a few days, spending Canada Day with some family, so he calls. We were talking about all the stuff we normally talk about, and then we were talking about my music and he said "you know what I would like...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 23 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 77 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    It's awesome now being able marry now

    if I'd love it for there to be an option. Finally it's legal. But still enjoy my freedom.
    ForbiddenFruitLove95 ForbiddenFruitLove95 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    I know I complain about him a lot.

    .. Because I'm not really getting what I want and get so fed up.. But some days are totally different... Today he texted me and asked me to call his work... I haven't heard his voice in a few weeks and it just.. God I love it... It was nice to just reconnect a bit... Figures the...
    AvaLennon AvaLennon 31-35, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    So I did it, I got married!

    It's been a little over a week and I never knew I could love in such a way. I am so utterly in love with my husband. Everyday spent on our honeymoon was magic. Now we're home, back to real life. I saw MM at work today. I promised myself I wouldn't go back there; not now, not...
    Tiffanyportelli Tiffanyportelli 22-25, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 157 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    It's amazing to be on the other side of the

    fence. I called it off. He never responded. And it just solidifies my feeling that he never cared for me...my instincts were right. I feel a weight lifted...but I am sad in a way because I have lost something that I though I had...even though in reality, there was never...
    untenable untenable 41-45, F 1 Response 4 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Dear S., You don't know me,

    but I had an affair with your husband for two years. It started when you were living apart because you didn't like the city he was transferred to, and continued briefly after you all relocated to a third city and moved back in together. Before me, he cheated on you with lots of...
    inaraserra inaraserra 31-35, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 45 Responses Jan 10

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    What a ride ....I love it ,

    hate it, happy ,sad,clear,confused...I been feeling real happy about our relationship its taking a turn in the right direction.It makes me so sad when i look at other women post.About how it over and they feel great about it,It confuses me ,We should know what we are getting into...
    peachy115 peachy115 51-55, F 4 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Ladies.... It's time

    for me to say goodbye. Coming here has gotten too painful for me. I know I didn't post much but I was usually at a loss for words. In a way, this is hard too... Just like saying goodbye to MM, I'm moving on from here. I wish each and everyone of you the very best life has to...
    serendipity65 serendipity65 41-45, F 7 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    We all want our relationship to be the one

    that's different from all the others we read about. After reading something heartbreaking, I would think, "yes, but we are different, he's different. We will be the success." I'm here, heartbroken without a shred of evidence that we were different. I have chat logs, pics...
    serendipity65 serendipity65 41-45, F 15 Responses 1 day ago

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    I ended things with mm this morning.

    It was kind of a sudden decision but I think it was the right one for right now. I care for him deeply but I just can't do it right now. Between my family, school and now both of my vehicles have died, I just have too much going on. I don't have time to worry about or put work...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 4 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    At this point I think our wedding might be

    postponed !!!!!!!Reason ....seems my due date is 13 days after our wedding date !! lol...OH MY GOD ! We are over the flipping moon, just alittle bit worried about everyone thinking we are only getting married because 'he knocked me up' since no one knows we have been...
    gigglelicious gigglelicious 36-40, F 9 Responses 1 day ago

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    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 18 Responses Mar 25

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    It's been nice spending time with my grandma

    but I am so ready to go home. Mm texted me last night, his competition went well but he didn't make the cut for the big job he wanted. He is a little down about it but he's going to keep trying. He said he misses me and asked if my distance the past week is my way of keeping him...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    I am in a different space,

    remiss of last April when he officially separated from his W. His attitude is very similar to what it was then. The attention. The looks. The future planning. The conversations. His ability to sit with me in some really deep places of pain. I have told him several times now...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    An interesting perspective

    that helped me... http://thecurrentconscience.com/blog/2012/08/08/you-dont-miss-him/
    Scorpionchild Scorpionchild 46-50, F 37 mins ago

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    MM2 phoned me last night.

    We were able to talk for quite a long time about everything that's been going on. He said he did msg me on Thursday and can even show me. I guess it just didn't come thru to me. We spoke a lot about him. He's very overwhelmed with his life right now. As I've said before he...
    Lust2much Lust2much 31-35, F 4 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 17 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    I am letting myself graduate from 'I am the

    other woman' to 'I was the other woman'. Here is the speech/letter I have made in my head: I have to say goodbye. I have to let you go. I'm not sure if we came into each other's lives because we were supposed to be together and it was just bad timing or if it was just to teach...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    I pull away and he starts chasing.

    It never fails. Sigh.
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 51 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    MadameMirage MadameMirage 36-40, F 6 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 170 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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