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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,602 People

    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 25

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    I never thought I'd be the other woman,

    and so much in love, but I am. My heart is aching. I should be happy but I have so many insecurities. He said I am THE woman. His woman. I'm still the other woman. He's going through a divorce. Right now, I feel like an inconvenience. It makes me worried to the point of...
    HotPinkDaisy HotPinkDaisy 41-45, F 3 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 42 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    Ok this is part of my last post.

    . Mm is a big part of the family we are not related but he related to the family so he always there
    confused7years confused7years 36-40, F 15 hrs ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 170 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    He disclosed our dating to his sister.

    !! She inquired about the future of our relationship. He said he does not know. For now he is happy in what we have. Perfect. Touchwood.
    coolvolatile coolvolatile 31-35, F 1 Response 14 hrs ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    Funny how one song can shake your entire world.

    ...today I heard...Eric Church - Like a wrecking ball....OMG the words are sooo powerful....the words made me cry actually to know that a man can desire his wife soooo much that the entire house will shake when he gets home and make love to her....such beautiful words....my H...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 2 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    Question are any of you related to ur Mm.

    .. And so how do you keep the distance when no contact
    confused7years confused7years 36-40, F 3 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    The sound of the rain is

    such an hypnotic sound to me....How i wish i could have him next to me laying in this couch just listening to this wonderful sound as he plays with my hair to sleep... ...I miss him...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 3 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 41-45, F 75 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    why do I try, why do i?

    this should be old at this point. I was downtown earlier thought I'd drop a text ...so I did. he reads the message ...but no response. there's nothing I can do or say. my feelings are hurt
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 2 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    For those who have managed to,

    how did you get over your MM? We met through a word game online over two years ago and started chatting as friends. Although it never progressed beyond an online / over the phone 'affair', it seems impossible to move on. The situation was so painful for me that time and time...
    whitepoppy77 whitepoppy77 31-35, F 2 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 29 Responses May 6, 2014

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    So last week was a really tough one.

    I came home a week ago Sunday after an amazing week with MM, to a husband with severe allergies. Not unusual, but this time he decided to self medicate and we spent a couple of freaky nights, until I convinced him it was a bad idea (think screaming dreams and sleep walking). On...
    whynot13 whynot13 46-50, F 3 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I ended things for good yesterday.

    I think he was surprised, but it was a very emotional ending. He is a very strong person by nature, but I could tell he was hurting. He asked me if there was someone else. I told him no. I cannot even date with him in my life. I simply said I wanted more. He said I deserve more...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 22 Responses Mar 22

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    I'm frustrated and this is the only place I can

    think of to vent it. I have been with my MM for over 6 years. For the most part, its been a very good relationship. We've had our ups and downs like everyone does. Lately, we've become more open about our feelings for each other. I don't know if I actually love him, but I do...
    lynn414 lynn414 41-45, F 4 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    Day 11 of nothing from him.

    He still hasn't developed any balls to tell me he doesn't want me anymore! And I don't think he will, he doesn't know that I know he's back with w. He is probably just planning to keep me hanging around for whenever he needs me... Well no more! Tomorrow is the start of a new...
    Prettybutterfly88 Prettybutterfly88 26-30, F 4 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    OH. MY. GOD. It's final,

    he's single, and as of 9:37am today I am no longer the OW!!!
    Shardsofsorrow Shardsofsorrow 31-35, F 77 Responses Jul 29

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    Any good tips on handling the no contact deal.

    .... this past weekend my mm really hurt my feelings we talked a bit today only because I contacted him or at least that's how I feel. I mean he did wave as we passed this morning just like he always does. I have been reading some of the post about nc and I was hoping someone had...
    camobaby83 camobaby83 31-35, F 1 Response 7 hrs ago

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    what I sent him, probably won't mean a thing.

    ..but hey what the hell ..why not. "Well, excuse me for trying to see you, excuse me for even thinking about you. I intern at firm in the area now, so i thought i'd drop a text, since it was convienient. I apologize. Really, I do. Kinda upsetting that you just read my message...
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    In honor of an OW member ,

    our very own writer extraordinaire, ( you know who you are) I changed my picture to a butterfly today. One of her stories changed my destiny. Honestly and truly it has. I have a suggestion. Why don't we choose an International Other Woman's Day. LOL that would seriously make a...
    LotusLIL LotusLIL 46-50, F 10 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    Three words I never thought I would hear from

    my MM....'I envy you'. He said this to me Friday night and I about dropped my phone. How in the world could he envy me? My marriage fell apart, I am constantly stressed due to the financial burden and debt my ex left me, I'm alone - this list is endless. I finally asked him...
    thelionsden13 thelionsden13 41-45, F 8 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    b4realz b4realz 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 80 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    For those of us who just ended things,

    or are hanging by a thread, the positive side of this freedom... No more watching them text back and forth like tweeners on our dates. No more lonely Sundays, feeling sad that it's an NC day. No more laying in bed every night wondering what they're doing in bed together. No...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 12

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 16 Responses Feb 6

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 21

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    I'm starting to become really mad at myself.

    .. It's totally my fault this relationship has become "best friends with benefits" while it started out differently. It's my fault because I let him lead, I let him have all the control, I never open my mouth when I'm upset or mad... However at least he senses this. I'm mad...
    AvaLennon AvaLennon 31-35, F 11 hrs ago

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    If I start working downtown,

    I know things will change between MM and I. Good or bad, things will change once he finds out that I will be in the same vicinity as him. I don't know how he would feel or say once I tell him. But I am very nervous, scared, excited. it's a lot of emotions I'm feeling right now...
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 10 hrs ago

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    He got D day 6 months ago.

    It was a complete surprise and a death that day. Have had very little contact since that day. He told w I was a two week affair. Six months later he is still on the couch. They tried counseling unsuccessfully and have very limited interaction with each other. Input please from...
    rainday66 rainday66 46-50, F 3 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    So I am kind of surprised

    that this milestone is here already....but today marks 2 months since the last time I saw ex-MM. Getting stronger by the day, never looking back!!!
    ArlingtonRose ArlingtonRose 36-40, F 5 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    I'm not the ow right now.

    But I was. When I was 19-20 I had an affair with a 40-41 year old military officer. He was amazing and strong and powerful and I just loved his attention. Well, during the summer when I was away in my own military training, he moved to Germany with his family. We maintained...
    monicawinter monicawinter 36-40, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    . I didn't expect to be back this soon.

    I just needed someone to hear me out since the outside world doesn't understand situations like these. I was in the "letting go" phase when i was last logged in. I was a walking zombie for nearly 3 weeks. I go to work depressed, not talking to anyone and doing what I possibly...
    plusisamust plusisamust 26-30, F 9 hrs ago

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    Well, I'm not the other woman,

    yet. But I want to be. I've been in a relationship for 4 years. I thought I was happy until I met my boss's boyfriend. Now I have the hots for him. While she's at work I go to her house and hang out with him, he buys me gifts and takes me out, and we text all the time. I want to...
    PlanetT PlanetT 18-21, F 3 hrs ago

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    I deleted most of my stories

    for personal reasons & probably won't post nearly as much. But today I am posting. (Ex)MM: I remember days when I couldn't even eat on my lunch break because of how upset I was over something you did. I would go home instead and sob into my pillow wondering what I did wrong...
    subgirl26 subgirl26 22-25, F 1 Response 11 hrs ago

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    Ugh. He and I knew that

    when my daughter came back, our time would change for a little while. Just slightly, but another change bone the less. She starts school tomorrow. Her dad remains in town and has plans to take her to dinner tomorrow after school. So, I tell my guy that I've figured out a way...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    I went on strike this weekend,

    intentionally forbidding myself from doing anything that would lead to any lingering thoughts of MM. I'm so glad I did. Sometimes clearing your mind is as simple and obvious as telling all the voices in your head to shut up. (Don't get me wrong - you may have to do it a few...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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