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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,143 People

    I was the other woman

    for a while. It was with a man at work. I am 19, he is 40. When I was hired at this place, I found out from the other girls there that he is married, but is a cheater and flirtatious. At first he and I were just friendly with each other, but then this summer when we were talking...
    pixieanddixie pixieanddixie 18-21, F 4 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Here I was thinking something was just

    so off and nothing is off. I'm just bumming and pretty sure it's some delayed reaction to a time of the month that was actually last week. I wonder why I feel super sensitive about him even though he is just as sweet as ever. It truly sucks to be a female sometimes. I don't ever...
    surfandturf surfandturf 36-40, F 3 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    I really need to think deeply about

    why I subject myself to all of this. Haven't heard from him since this morning. Realize he was working and getting ready for a work seminar this weekend. But not even a quick email. Yet had enough time to be liking stuff on fb
    blue963 blue963 51-55, F 7 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    We hold hands all the time.

    Seriously. ALL the TIME. It's to the point where we don't even realize it. Sitting on the couch watching tele, sitting on the porch having drinks, laying in bed going to sleep... You always hold my hand. The touch of your hand is something I have always known. Zero doubt...
    RedHotPepper RedHotPepper 26-30, F 1 Response 7 hrs ago

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    I love flirty Friday lunches

    that morph into unexpectedly urgent passionate afternoons... Mmmmm now that wasn't planned!
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 4 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    No I'm not one but I read the stories on this

    forum regularly for my own reasons and occasionally comment, never condescending but only to add my two cents. Hopefully my story can add to it. I was ending a 10 year marriage in the early 90's not because of "another woman" but one did become the deciding factor. After years...
    Mrperfectstranger Mrperfectstranger 51-55, M 4 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I just responded to a post on here

    which got me to thinking (yes, y'all are in trouble while I ramble). If you're not mature enough to handle being an OW, sugar don't go down that road. The statement was made that his OW called W and said they were getting married. Excuse me? She (the W) is not your...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 26 Responses Oct 8

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 78 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    I am a 57 year old woman

    who has finally met the man of her dreams. My story is extraordinary and unique. My husband took me to England to celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary. While there we met a distant cousin and her husband. My life has never been the same because the husband I'm referring to...
    chowitt chowitt 56-60, F 5 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    Ok i been with my mm

    for 7 years going on 8 on& off . We argue cuz he likes going to the bar on Fridays after work . Well we had came to an understanding he would only go when we met up or he would have to leave by a certain time. Well it's been a month that he came back well all this month it's...
    confused7years confused7years 36-40, F 5 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    Tomorrow is not looking good.

    He will let me know in a little while. This was an hour ago. I told him I was disappointed, but it is what it is. Yesterday, he asked me about my ex-boyfriend. He asked if he was still in a relationship. I told him no, he was now single. He asked if I still talked to...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 1 Response 15 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 51 Responses Feb 16

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    Saw MM today...ya know,

    to break things off so I could get clarity. Welp, that did happen, kind of. It also ended in mind blowing sex. I swear, the man has some sort of voodoo spell on me. One day at a time.
    kikimarie1978 kikimarie1978 36-40, F 6 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I just got home from being with my MM

    since 1:30. At first all we did was running around doing work stuff that needed done and then we went to have some drinks. It was there were i had the talk with him. He actually initiated it not because he wanted to but because he knew it was important to me. I asked him how...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 3 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 81 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 47 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    I am new here. I don't know any of the

    abbreviations. Any help would be appreciated. I have been in an affair with a married man for 3 years. I am also married, been not quite 12 years. I just miscarried a baby that was not my husbands. I'm a wreck. I guess I am hoping to find other women out there so I don't feel...
    BB262 BB262 41-45, F 9 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    I don't usually like to play games,

    but today I feel like making him work for it. He's been pretty busy lately and a bit distant. He asked me to come by his office for a visit, and ordinarily I would jump at the chance, but instead I just told him maybe later if I had time. Make him miss me instead of running...
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 5 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    So as this story starts

    for everyone I think, I had no plan to become the OW. I met my MM two years ago, and until a few months ago, what we had was a very deep growing friendship. Then the flirting crossed a line, and I moved the line, a couple of times. But finally there was nothing left for us...
    whynot13 whynot13 46-50, F 6 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 39 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    I guess I'm finally free.

    It doesn't feel so great right now. He told me that he was going to make things work with her for the sake of their son. That it's too hard for him to be without his son and that all of the back and forth with custody is starting to affect him. That it's breaking his heart to...
    Lavender25 Lavender25 26-30, F 11 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Well here goes. I've been lurking

    for a few months now and decided it's time for me to write my feelings out. Married to a good man and an amazing dad. We have not been intimate in 4-5 months. In the last year, we have not been out on a date and I think we're at the point where we love each other but not in...
    kikimarie1978 kikimarie1978 36-40, F 46 Responses 4 days ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 15 Responses Jun 2

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 68 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 35 Responses 1 day ago

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    I am completely trashed.

    Drunk. And all I want is to tell you all the horrible things that go in in my life. But that would kill our fun. Our vibe of safe and good and all things pleasant. Because that's what we have together. We are our happy place. We ***** a little but we come to enjoy each other. We...
    neverendingmadness neverendingmadness 36-40, F 3 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 146 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10

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    I had a bad night last night

    and couldn't sleep. (I shared that with him this morning and he knew i was going to the therapist today) It may sound silly, but I am disappointed that it is late afternoon and he didn't check in to see how I am. He knows I have so much going on in my life. I never complain...
    blue963 blue963 51-55, F 2 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 7 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 16 Responses May 4

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 76 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Ugh. Where do I even start?

    It's 4:47 a.m. and I'm awake. Just woke up with the dry heaves because I was unable to cope with what happened last night without abusing alcohol on my flight home. Context: Last Monday, he texted me that W was staying at a friend's house overnight on Friday. I asked him if...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 4 Responses 40 mins ago

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    Do they actually love their wives?

    ??? Why won't he leave already
    Truone16 Truone16 31-35, F 27 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 42 Responses Feb 24

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    NOT ANYMORE...It's done.

    Six years and one month...and it's over. My MM told me today that he thought it best that we break up. He's never broken up with me before except at D-Day and one time when he was suspended from work because he was caught with me during work hours. Each time, I waited for...
    insouciant1 insouciant1 41-45, F 26 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 45 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    Anyone else feel like you're just really good

    friends? Yeah, we see each other and I know he loves his family, and they get along really nice, but you also don't mind being there. You don't consider it dating or 'seeing each other' but more of good friends hanging out together.
    StringedAlong StringedAlong 18-21, F 3 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    For lavc, and the rest of us

    who spend entirely too much time here. You can get so confused that you’ll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place. The Waiting Place… for people just...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 4 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    Waiting. Always waiting.

    Are we seeing each other tomorrow? Will it be near you as usual? Will it be near me since you have to help your father-in-law with yard work? Will it not happen at all? Waiting to hear. Always waiting.
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 4 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 2

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    Sitting with family at dinner on Sunday,

    my brother, without knowing it, gave me a pretty good idea why men who are miserable in their marriages stay. After 13 years and one eight year old boy with his crazy wife, my brother finally is divorced. He is dating my best friend and is very happy for the first time in ages...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 36 Responses Sep 23

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 162 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Oh someone kill me now!

    So a while earlier I was moaning about him ignoring me. Well I left him a message basically saying what I had written here. He's messaged me and said his grandma has passed away and to leave him alone. I feel awful, I've said I'm sorry but he doesn't want to know.
    Prettybutterfly88 Prettybutterfly88 22-25, F 8 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Do you have defined parameters

    for your relationship with your MM? Do you and him both know what's acceptable and what makes the other uncomfortable? Example: We both have agreed that if 1 wants to take a side trip the other goes as well. We're a packaged deal. He knows that I'm open to it and I know he's...
    eapple eapple 31-35, F 5 Responses 11 hrs ago

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