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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 12,631 People

    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 19 Responses Mar 25

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 155 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    Here on EP I met another 'other woman'

    and we clicked. Almost a year ago now and we talk every single day. Well yesterday we travelled the country and met half way for the first time an had an amazing weekend away together! Lots of good food, drinks, dancing and laughs! Best friend for life!! Just thought I would...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 13 Responses Apr 19

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    Another vent... Still haven't heard from him,

    he's gone to ground. In the past he's done this to help my marriage but now we are separating and I know I need to get out, it's been emotional abusive for months. I could just do with his support, but it's nearly a week now of nothing. It breaks my heart to the extent that I...
    NicoleMantel NicoleMantel 36-40, F 6 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 19 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    So except for a 'thanks' text

    after I texted him this morning, I have not heard from MM. I KNOW he's on a business trip. I KNOW he's in meetings. I KNOW he's going to have a client dinner. I KNOW on these trips the chances were are going to talk much are slim to none. I just wish I KNEW for a fact that these...
    thelionsden13 thelionsden13 41-45, F 4 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I haven't posted here in a long,

    long time. Mostly it's because I had a hell of a D-day in early February. My H discovered the affair, confronted me & threatened to send his proof to MM's wife. I use the opportunity to end my marriage. And so did MM. But, we did not end it to be with each other. We took...
    crazycontrolled crazycontrolled 36-40, F 23 Responses Apr 30

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    Read this if you wanna check out the mental ups

    and downs of this whole other woman experience! As you all know he ended thins with her two months back, got with me, I had trust issues and him and her kept contact which inevitably led to us ending and them getting back. I called him out on it and we argued-huge big row and...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 93 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    I ended things for good yesterday.

    I think he was surprised, but it was a very emotional ending. He is a very strong person by nature, but I could tell he was hurting. He asked me if there was someone else. I told him no. I cannot even date with him in my life. I simply said I wanted more. He said I deserve more...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 23 Responses Mar 22

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    If any of you women or

    whoever decides to get on this forum and happens to read my post and don't like what I have to say and wants to start being a bully, a nag, or has the urge to start drama because u don't like what I have to say on my page. make life easy for yourself....block me! simple as that...
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 71 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    the only time is if my ex,

    my first love, comes calling on me. and if he happens to be in a relationship at the time, it can't be helped. I know we will end up together anyway, it's just right now we can't be.
    kleeeohh kleeeohh 26-30, F 1 Response 12 hrs ago

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    Do any of you have suggestions on how to

    distract yourself when you just want to reach out and contact him? I know that if he's not contacting me, he's usually either busy or can't get away from W, so sometimes I want to try to give him space even if I feel like messaging him all the time just to chat about the my day...
    Julianne2222 Julianne2222 36-40, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 170 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    can someone update some with terms.

    like what is MM. lol please :)
    Aprilbaby4 Aprilbaby4 22-25 1 Response 11 hrs ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 54 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    So today I told mm I needed him.

    .. that I needed to see him that I was just at my breaking point... I told him I needed him to help me out of this hole I am in and that I needed his reassurance.... I got nothing I got a couple of texts and an idk we will see... well ur right we will see... I don't want him to...
    emeraldprincess1003 emeraldprincess1003 22-25, F 6 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    super long but worth reading!

    Alright guys ive decided to let you in on my experience. so 4years ago my brother becomes friends with some neighbors of our up the street. and I meet all of his homies. I see that his friend/AP has a gf and a baby and im very respectful. I didnt have any interest in him. I...
    Aprilbaby4 Aprilbaby4 22-25 2 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    UPDATE: MM and I had a looooong chat last night

    and this morning. It got off to a shaky start and we were both defensive. He said we needed to think about the "type of relationship" we have. I offered to walk away... But what I love about us is our deep connection and understanding. The ability to be completely open and...
    daisyblue222 daisyblue222 41-45, F 6 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    I am not cut out for this.

    I had an epiphany last night - I don't know where I've been for the past two years but it just suddenly hit me and I could feel again. I could feel horribly guilty and scared and angry and every other emotion under the sun. I don't know how I could be so careless and reckless. I...
    KarlaAndrews KarlaAndrews 26-30, F 7 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    It was never my intention to be one I just

    can't get myself to leave I love him too much. I know at the end it will never be an us that someday he'll need to go back to his rightful place. is it wrong to stay w/ a person you love even though that person wasn't yours to begin with?
    agreelx2 agreelx2 22-25, F 3 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    I'm entering the last week of my first

    trimester. Definitely have that bump going on. The baby is the size of a plum. A plum baby! I have another sonogram next week. I can't wait to see how much the nut has grown. I'm going to start making a financial plan in the next few days. I know I can't stay at my job too much...
    lostanddistraught lostanddistraught 26-30, F 9 Responses 1 day ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 17 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 51 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    Well , everything been going smooth .

    He will be going home next month hopefully to sort out everything . I told him we can't be sexually involved while he still married , so he is ready to sort out the mistake he says he did when he was young . Waiting patiently ...
    BluePearl64 BluePearl64 31-35, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 28 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 204 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Goodness, my pregnancy hormones are off the

    charts. I have zero patience with my MM. I got sooo mad at him that I send him to hell. I hate hurting him. I wish I could control these outbursts. The
    4bdnluv 4bdnluv 31-35, F 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    An update I don't want to write.

    .. My new reality is him being gone all through the week, brief times I see him at the office with a quick kiss if there is an opportunity, long-distance texts full of "I miss you" and "I love you", and weekends of NC because he is home doing home things... It's been this way for...
    ElsieJay ElsieJay 41-45, F 1 Response 11 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 18 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 86 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    whos needs someone to chat with

    and express some things I'm this subject. hmu! :)
    Aprilbaby4 Aprilbaby4 22-25 1 day ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 27 Responses May 6, 2014

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 78 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    I'm scared that MM is going to end things.

    He is so unavailable these days. Yesterday he sent me 2 lines all day. The day before the same. And he is not checking his WhatsApp regularly now so doesn't see when I text him wanting to talk. This morning he went online, read my messages from last night, but didn't even text...
    daisyblue222 daisyblue222 41-45, F 9 Responses 1 day ago

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    See her come down, through the clouds I feel

    like a fool I aint got nothing left to give Nothing to lose So come on Love, draw your swords Shoot me to the ground You are mine, I am yours Lets not **** around Cause you are, the only one Cause you are, the only one I see them snakes come through the ground They choke me...
    subgirl26 subgirl26 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I really miss him. ??

    I miss being there, seeing his mom, sharing laughs. I was good with his kids. like sometimes I envy his gf. but sometimes im glad im not her. as mean as that sounds. ugh idk.
    Aprilbaby4 Aprilbaby4 22-25 3 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    I wish he had of never said "when".

    I wish he had of never said "I ****** up and will continue to feel this way until we are back together". I wish he wasn't pretending at home. I wish I could shake the new nagging anxiety.
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 1 Response 23 hrs ago

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    Um... What does this mean?

    ! He called me and said "I've been thinking about something for a long time and wanted to share and ask, but have been hesitant. I know we both need vacations so I was thinking we could go to Vegas mid week at the end of June." Wait. What just happened here? He went on to say...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 6 Responses 11 hrs ago

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