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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 9,620 People

    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 22 Responses Jul 30

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 5 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    Being with him is amazing,

    being away from him is torture!!!!
    Changedforever9514 Changedforever9514 36-40, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    Mondays have lately not been the best.

    He comes in a bad mood and says it's from being around her all weekend and not being able to spend them with me. I want to believe him but struggle since he will never take the steps to move forward and be happy. A fight over something petty. Of course, he realizes it and...
    Risktakingflirtation Risktakingflirtation 22-25, F 4 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    Revelation. Saw MM today,

    he was working and I walked with him for a while because he works in town security I ventured with him for a short while and I have no idea why but I just walked away without saying goodbye to go buy a drink and I didnt even feel the urge to go back and find him like I used to...
    hankpalmer hankpalmer 18-21, F 1 Response 15 hrs ago

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    I was here a few months ago,

    but was spending too much time on EP. I made a few posts under another account about being the OW. Now I am free. I have been the OW twice in my life and it was more painful than good. I've really grown and now my relationship with my long term boyfriend is so much stronger...
    wanderlust0 wanderlust0 26-30, F 2 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Today we are going to look at houses

    because he wants to move out. I know I should feel really guilty but I'm excited.
    Heygirlheyy55 Heygirlheyy55 18-21, F 5 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    My mm sent me flowers,

    that was so sweet of him he probably knows how much I'm missing him right now. This week is going to be so long without him.
    honeybree20 honeybree20 18-21, F 1 Response 17 hrs ago

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    I am having a tough time here.

    He works the weekend. Sat was good contact. Yesterday not so good and he is just spending tim on FB during his breaks today. He used to spend them chatting with me. I guess I have been stupid for doing all of this no good for me to feel this way. I am tired of games and...
    blue963 blue963 46-50, F 5 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Tears upon tears. Bitterness crept in earlier.

    Did something slightly bad and emailed her. Sneaked a look at her details the other week and stores them. The silly girl is so unaware of me whereas he told me she knew we slept together 'just the once' and he had dumped her last weekend. She assumed it was me contacting her...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 3 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I need to get a proper job,

    where I'm working and keeping busy. I work odd things and get by right now only having to work one or two days every couple weeks and honestly.. That leaves me with way to much time to think!! I go over so many scenarios in my head about me and him too much. It's driving me...
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 1 Response 15 hrs ago

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    Was. I was the other woman.

    We had been talking off and on for years but he would always go back to her. And I was living my own life that resulted in my wonderful son. We eventually started working together, me, him and his wife. It was the most awkward and uncomfortable experience of my life. He...
    redandlovely redandlovely 18-21, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 74 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    So here's a twisted thought I wanted to throw

    out there. I wonder how many OW suffered long term sexual abuse as children/young women and kept it secret. Where you were essentially like the OW in that situation. I'm just trying to understand why I continue to subject myself to this roller coaster of emotions, and if it has...
    SleeplessNites SleeplessNites 41-45, F 11 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    Mm and I were both pretty busy this weekend he

    did at least touch base with me Saturday. Sunday I was struck down with the worst cold of my life (yes I'm a little dramatic), so I went to the walk in clinic this morning which turned into an all day event. I got to talk to mm on the phone while waiting on my prescriptions...
    ynoTme83 ynoTme83 31-35, F 12 hrs ago

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    Day 4 of no contact..

    ..I wish I had a magic potion to stop loving him-I will get there!!!
    Gossipgirl1408 Gossipgirl1408 41-45, F 4 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    For the first time since we started this we are

    not going to have a day together this week. We were able to spend some time together last night, but normally because we both work non-traditional hours and the F works a traditional 9-5, we can score one off day together. This week it didn't work out. I know our situation...
    belsu belsu 26-30, F 14 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 43 Responses Feb 24

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    I was so excited to see him today

    since we haven't been able to see each other for two weeks. He got a call from the W and I could tell that our time was going to be short. But he made sure to leave me with a smile. Can't wait to see him tomorrow night.
    Dreamingofhim0514 Dreamingofhim0514 26-30, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    No contact since Friday.

    . I deleted the messenger app we use. He just text.. Of course I want to respond, but I'm torn.
    4kari 4kari 31-35, F 4 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    Long story short: got a text from mm today

    saying that he's heard his wife hired an investigator. And that she's trying to get his work phone records. I'm not sure what to make of this. I told him months ago that I had heard abt her supposedly hiring one. So this is not news to me, and shouldn't be for him. And I'm not...
    emotionalwreck27 emotionalwreck27 36-40, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 44 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 16 Responses May 4

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    So I have decided to give a very nice single

    guy a real shot. He is not like the guys I normally pick, he's not insanely attractive, but then again neither was mm. He does however treat me way better than I deserve, he brings me flowers, apple snapple, he's a real sweetheart. I have even told him about mm, and the w drama...
    leigh8133 leigh8133 31-35, F 5 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    PrincessLolita PrincessLolita 26-30, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    I was the other women

    for a year but now I am the wife. We will be celebrating our 3 year wedding anniversary soon. We were both married to other people when we met. We were both in bad marriages. We are both so much happier now. If anyone wants to hear my story I am happy to share.
    magic2929 magic2929 46-50, F 19 Responses Apr 29

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 143 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 2

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    What do you do when you feel like everythings

    falling apart? When you can't carry on any more? I can't take this. I just want to disappear, self destruct. Anything to stop it hurting.
    mayarose3 mayarose3 26-30, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    Why do all the haters say you're always going

    to be second choice? Maybe we are second choice when he "has" to go home but in reality we aren't second choice in his heart or his mind. I can almost promise that he's thinking about me more than his wife. I can almost promise his heart is starting to lead him else where and...
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 88 Responses Aug 10

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 48 Responses Feb 16

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    A little levity for a Monday.

    My MM sent this to me today ...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 4 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I just sent him a quick text to have a safe

    trip. Nothing else. He hates when I text him without the okay from him that all is clear. Ooops.
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 4 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    Been waiting months to see him.

    .. canellations keep happening because of his job.anyways... sux because i have a flu or cold or something. Idk how i can drive hours to go spend time with him when my head feels like a drippy pile of bricks. It was like fate when we met but now its likr fate keeping us apart. I...
    sweetplumeria sweetplumeria 36-40 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    Long day of texting after no contact

    since Friday, and very limited all last week. He wants to continue seeing me.. I told him he didn't have that option if he wasn't leaving. But I miss him so much.. I want him to come see me right now. :(
    4kari 4kari 31-35, F 1 Response 7 hrs ago

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    Day 5 of NC. I have been doing ok

    for the most part but feeling down tonight. I really just miss him. I know that I shouldn't and that he doesn't miss me or even care about me at all but that doesn't change my feelings for him. Boy, can I sure pick em?! :-
    ArlingtonRose ArlingtonRose 31-35, F 5 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 20 Responses Sep 10

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    We found two houses today

    that we both love. And at the end of the week he is filing for divorce. Things are looking up. And I can't help but be happy. I still feel guilty but at the end of the day I know that we both deserve to be happy. And that's what were gonna be.
    Heygirlheyy55 Heygirlheyy55 18-21, F 4 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    Feeling crazy tonight,

    can't get my mind around it. Long story short. My MM just moved with W and kid back to Tennessee. I just moved here a year ago to be near him. Been together for two years now. We're still very much together but I can't help to feel like he left me. I understand he had to go and...
    dsuzy dsuzy 36-40, F 8 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 15 Responses Jun 2

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    My Secret Gold Coin

    You don’t know it, but I think of you as a beautiful, precious, shiny gold coin that I keep secretly hidden in my pocket. I feel happy knowing that you are in there, but unhappy knowing that you have to stay hidden. I wish I could show you off to friends, but they wouldn’t...
    jenn80 jenn80 51-55 18 Responses May 23, 2013

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 23 Responses May 6

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 37 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 161 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 46 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    Thank you everyone for your support

    and opinions earlier. Due to how recognizable my story is (paranoia in play!) I have removed them.
    nonameplease74 nonameplease74 36-40, F 2 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Things I don't miss from my affair.

    .. 1. Waiting for my phone to ding 2. Lying to spouse about where I am going 3. Making sure I erase texts 4. Time 5. Mind control that the affair holds not mm 6. Questioning of myself and actions 7. Guilt not for the affair but for my husband and his wife 8. Time 9. The panic...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 15 Responses Apr 27

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