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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 7,189 People

    Hey all. Was out of town

    for the weekend trying to get my own thoughts together. A lot going on. Seriously thinking of how to proceed with my life. I am putting my relationship with my mm on hold. I need to take some time to recoup and figure out if this is what I really would like to pursue. As much...
    lilred101 lilred101 41-45, F 1 Response 19 mins ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 138 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    So this question is for the married men having

    affairs. What conditions would make you go distant with your other woman? Also would you end an affair with the other woman or would she have to end it?
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 3 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 17 Responses May 4

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    Things I don't miss from my affair.

    .. 1. Waiting for my phone to ding 2. Lying to spouse about where I am going 3. Making sure I erase texts 4. Time 5. Mind control that the affair holds not mm 6. Questioning of myself and actions 7. Guilt not for the affair but for my husband and his wife 8. Time 9. The panic...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 12 Responses Apr 27

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    Was up at 5:30 this morning thinking.

    (I don't have to get up until 7:45) This time I was planning my "exit" strategy.....that if he didn't make an effort to see me by the end of the week I was going to end it. I laid awake thinking about what I was going to say. That I would tell him how selfish he is, and how...
    PrincessLolita PrincessLolita 26-30, F 1 Response 14 hrs ago

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    Yup. No response text.

    He had officially hurt and pissed me off again. He can wallow in his miserable life. I'm going to do my best to salvage mine.
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 3 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 11 Responses Jun 2

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 22-25, F 19 Responses Apr 18

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    I am so disgusted with myself.

    Instead of just having no contact with my MM and leaving with my self-respect and head held high, I blew it. I did have a conversation with him on Friday which left me feeling better. Instead of just leaving it be, I called him today several times. He was not in his office...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 3 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 36 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 29 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Mwahhhh! I'm so upset with myself right now.

    I broke down last night and texted my OM. Was out with friends and asked him to come out. He started his reply with "Sweetie" which was the first time he's ever used a term of endearment. Needless to say, I was on cloud 9. But, I'm not gonna read anymore into it. Anyway, he...
    thatdresstho thatdresstho 41-45, F 1 Response 12 hrs ago

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    He literally changes from day to day

    or sometimes hour to hour or moment to moment. Very talkative and sweet and affectionate to no contact, cold and distant the next. We are almost like a couple to no we are just friends having fun. Gawd im so confused right now!!!!!
    pearl26ab pearl26ab 26-30, F 4 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 64 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 204 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 9 Responses Feb 11

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    Pause. Right here. Everything is perfect.

    Let nothing change. Unless change includes buckets of money and my HEA. In which case rock on. :)
    neverendingmadness neverendingmadness 36-40, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 2

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    Both Sides of the Fence!

    I lived in a sexless marriage for many years. My spouse did not. He like dripping his wick elsewhere, through our entire marriage. I didn't want to catch any thing so... glad he was getting taken care of ...cause he wasn't touching me again... that was for sure! I am divorce...
    MorningBreeze MorningBreeze 56-60, F 26 Responses Feb 15

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 14 Responses Apr 19

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    Meeting him today!! Can't describe the

    excitement although all of you know- please let this hour go SLOW!!
    Changedforever9514 Changedforever9514 36-40, F 4 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    I over analyze everything especially with my MM.

    I know he's backed off but I don't think he did it bc he wanted to. I have a feeling the wife got suspicious. It needed to happen anyway. Our relationship could never go anywhere. I remember that 6th sense when my ex husband found someone else. He ended up leaving me for her. I...
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 1 Response 20 hrs ago

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    "If you are unhappy, you should leave" -

    if it could be done as easy as it sounds like, then there won't be us here finding ourselves in love and in pain ...
    saigonrita saigonrita 26-30, F 2 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 21 Responses May 6

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    Please, do not stop posting.

    ... I may not be the best person to make this request because I have only participated on the forum for just a few months. But I am so glad I had a place to go. I can not begin to tell you how supportive you ladies have been during my time of heart aches, up swings, troubles...
    saiyagyrl saiyagyrl 36-40, F 4 Responses May 26

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    Is it possible to take several steps back

    emotionally? This relationship with my MM is going to kill me slowly. Up until recently he told me he was hoping to leave his W next month. Since then his home situation has changed - a daughter is moving back home after being away at college last year. He feels that he needs...
    JulyBug JulyBug 36-40, F 8 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Loving him is a pain .

    .. But living my life without him is also a pain... I need to decide which pain I can endure ...
    saigonrita saigonrita 26-30, F 5 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    So begins a 24 hour shift with my MM :-) it's

    gonna be a great day!!!! Hope everyone else has a great day as well!!!
    Newlife48 Newlife48 46-50, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 162 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    I have such an urge to email right now

    and I know I need to have my head on right. No am so devastated right now. I won't email but it is so hard
    blue963 blue963 46-50, F 2 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 40 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    I was the other women

    for a year but now I am the wife. We will be celebrating our 3 year wedding anniversary soon. We were both married to other people when we met. We were both in bad marriages. We are both so much happier now. If anyone wants to hear my story I am happy to share.
    magic2929 magic2929 46-50, F 17 Responses Apr 29

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 48 Responses Feb 16

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    kc5316 kc5316 22-25, F 21 hrs ago

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 82 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    I got too close to my teacher.

    I got too emotionally involved. We were more like friends, not teacher/student. Flirty friends. About 8 or 9 months after I graduated, I told him I was in love with him. He actually kept talking to me. He told me to keep emailing him and sending him funny pictures. He acted like...
    atadbitinlove atadbitinlove 18-21, F 4 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I told him today that I thought he should leave

    his other, especially since she's threatening to take his kid, then I apologized for being out of line. I really have no business telling him that when I knew he wouldn't from the start. Surprisingly he wasn't mad and he's talked to me more today than in the past few months. I...
    SeraphineL SeraphineL 22-25, F 12 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 43 Responses Feb 24

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 69 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Just want to put this out there to all you

    other "other women" you keep me positive... You nail my feet to the ground... You make me smile ... You put my heart back in my chest ... Thank you and when I see you pouring your heart out I feel it... I hope all the best for everyone of you misunderstood beautiful women ... I...
    jupsta jupsta 36-40, F 8 Responses Jun 9

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    I do believe that's 3 'dates' set up!

    ! Ok so I'm probably heading for heartache. As you know, it's been 3 weeks since he broke it off, he's single and I'm still married. Guess he's had enough space. Asked me to go to beach for drinks and sunset watching this weekend! He asked me! That's rare. I also asked him about...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 2 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    So happy for the contact he's maintained

    while he's on vacation. We texted everyday last week so I had decided to just leave him alone as much as possible this week and I told him that. First thing this morning he texted me and periodically throughout the day. :-) I still plan to lay back this week but if he texts I...
    GenieH22 GenieH22 36-40, F 5 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    I am really not having a good day at all.

    I am anxious for it to be over in many ways. I feel like im ready to jump off of a ledge. I have Never been this bad before.
    blue963 blue963 46-50, F 4 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Moving On.....I Didn'T Think I Would Ever Be Able To Say That

    I must admit that I have been pretty much obsessed over the man I cheated with. I haven't talked to him in over a year since the truth about us came out. But everyday I think about him and wonder how he is, what he is doing, how his son is, if he thinks about me at all...
    SS81 SS81 31-35, F 64 Responses May 8, 2013

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    It freaking amazes me how he can be

    so open on the phone telling me he's in love with me and has been for awhile then in person he's completely different. Ugh and then wonders why I'm so insecure and confused in our relationship.
    ynoTme83 ynoTme83 26-30, F 5 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I had such a wonderful day!

    !!😍😍😍 The hugging and holding each other this morning was amazing and then an unexpected afternoon hug. He was in such a good mood today. The talk on the way home was so awesome!!! I can't wait until tomorrow morning!!!!!
    lollipopgirl2 lollipopgirl2 41-45, F 5 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    So the time has finally come,

    here goes nothing! My MM and I have been talking and spending time together for a month and this week we will be meeting up to be intimate for the first time. I am both nervous and excited. I still can't believe that I am in this situation; I don't chase married men or have a...
    addicted2him1966 addicted2him1966 31-35, F 5 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    Something I have been hesitant to share here,

    but feel like I need to....and it is absolute troll bait...*sigh* but here goes: I have mentioned my MMs family has massive legal issues. His son is facing prison time. W has a massive rap sheet and, until recently, open bench warrants for her arrest. as you may guess, legal...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 7 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    hey all ! ... this is important

    and big. can i have a small time of yours, just little.. few minutes.. i sign up here around a year back to share my story with people and i did. i expected people will help me out from my heart broken stage and yes to maximum extend people helped, thanks a lot... then i began...
    heartless2 heartless2 22-25, M 5 Responses 6 hrs ago

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