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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 12,287 People

    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 17 Responses Mar 25

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    Mm said "we are so good together--I'm crazy

    about you". My day is made:)
    ladylove0113 ladylove0113 36-40, F 1 Response 22 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    For the next 4 days I am a year older

    than MM. He has sent me the sweetest, most loving messages for my birthday - both at midnight last night and this morning. Third year in a row now... Even though we can't be physically together, I am feeling very blessed.
    daisyblue222 daisyblue222 41-45, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    I am not the OW, but I'm

    so proud of you ladies. You go through hell and back for these men. You love, comfort, support, and love these men. I do not know how you do it. I read your stories and I'm in awe....sheer breathtaking, gutwrenching, heartbreaking, overwhelming, love-infused awe of you all...
    soldiergirl2 soldiergirl2 41-45, F 11 Responses Apr 6

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 28 Responses May 6, 2014

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    Getting random sweet texts out of the blue.

    Songs of the heart and I love you's.. One thing that made us closer; the conversations smoother, is that we share and sing songs to each other. It's like 90% of our phone calls we've sang to each other. Honestly, it's mostly him singing, although, I love to sing too! It's just...
    isch71 isch71 26-30, F 12 mins ago

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    I'm not the other woman how ever I caught my ex

    girlfriend cheating. Anyways here Question have any of you that married or dating anyone accused anyone of cheating on you I mean your way of project guilt to throw the scent off of you like my ex.
    Raina79 Raina79 31-35, F 4 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 18 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 86 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    so today was an ok day.

    .since he stopped instant chatting I barely look at my phone or charge it and as it may last nyt he sent me an instant msg but my phone was off so then smsed me saying my data is off...all of which I read this morning. ...well today he massaged me and I kissed him...but it was...
    ANGELKZ ANGELKZ 26-30, F 23 hrs ago

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    hi ladies. This will be my last post

    and I have to leave. My husband (will be ex) has lost it. He's stalking me on any social media, he's threatening custody and. A number of crazy things Even if you don't think you will be caught. Prepare for being cAught. Store away money. Make copies of things. Just for safety...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 18 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 14 Responses Feb 6

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    Had the thought today (not

    for the first time) that I don't want to be the OW. That I should be in a real relationship with someone who can give me all of himself. But the heart wants what it wants and I wouldn't even begin to know how to walk away.
    BrandedScarlet BrandedScarlet 36-40, F 6 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 80 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    we broke up march 13.

    don't even know how many weeks its been guess that's a good sign. I've talked to him everyday since. just joking yesterday and I told him I was just using him for sex. he replied not anymore. I said well for now. we could just have sex once in awhile just to keep us both honest...
    libby59 libby59 46-50 1 Response 2 hrs ago

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    I'm back after 10 wonderful days away with my

    MM. MM had a work conference out of town and it worked out so I was able to go with him. Being together for 10 days only strengthened our feelings for each other and being able to wake up together every morning made it so special. So I just wanted to let all my friends know...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    So this happy mistress is off on a girls

    weekend to majorca , love my freedom, love my life!!! has he been rather more communicative the last few days of course he has!!! Off to have fun/laugh/sun bathe/ drink prosecco and be grateful that not only am I alive and breathing, I'm alive and totally living ! Don't make...
    MRGFF MRGFF 36-40, F 5 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    I ended things for good yesterday.

    I think he was surprised, but it was a very emotional ending. He is a very strong person by nature, but I could tell he was hurting. He asked me if there was someone else. I told him no. I cannot even date with him in my life. I simply said I wanted more. He said I deserve more...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 24 Responses Mar 22

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 204 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    I had the opportunity to chat with ex-MM's

    ex-girlfriend today. This was a live in gf before he met his W or me.... Very eye opening indeed. I am actually pretty thankful for this interaction because it strengthened my resolve to maintain NC.
    ArlingtonRose ArlingtonRose 36-40, F 3 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    So we won't be able to have the private time

    together we usually have on Fridays, so he is coming over to cook dinner for my daughter and I instead. And of course he is a great cook.
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    Today's been hard for some reason.

    I saw mm last night for a couple hours. We just sat and talked, I really like when we do that but I woke up feeling very insecure and uneasy. This is usually when I become irrational and do or say something stupid to him. I decided to write him an email. I'm not going to send it...
    moepeep moepeep 22-25, F 2 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Dear ladies, For those of you trying to

    maintain NC, I feel for you. My heart breaks for those of you who are hurting. Although I am not in this situation right now, I did go through a period of NC with my MM. I found this gem on the ol' interweb and thought it was fantastic! Stick to No Contact If NC is a struggle...
    MadameMirage MadameMirage 36-40, F 3 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    Today was actually okay.

    Cried a bit about the job but he was there for me. He met me this morning and he made me feel calm. He said today that he's using counseling to process what he's got going on. We had good conversation today. He says he means what he says to me. I'm okay.
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 12 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 26 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    Ladies, I think I am over thinking things.

    For the most part my posts are positive because my relationship is very positive. Today we had another one of our amazing days of wonderful conversations. Even finished our day with a little visit before heading home. Now, for those who aren't familiar with our story, we...
    Randomgirl1122 Randomgirl1122 31-35, F 3 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    NC. Day 5 Cant sleep last night.

    .. Woke up with a heavy head and heavy heart.. Can this be any easier? Does mm comeback? Mine did the first time.. Now i think its for good. Still hoping but i know i shouldnt.
    Rogue9926 Rogue9926 31-35, F 2 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    So to update you all,

    weekend hotel excursion has been cancelled. Not by me but by MM. He feels that it would be a waste of money considering that we won't be able to do all the things I enjoy. Plus he really wants to prove to me that our relationship is so much more than sex. So our new plans are...
    thelionsden13 thelionsden13 41-45, F 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 41 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    Here on EP I met another 'other woman'

    and we clicked. Almost a year ago now and we talk every single day. Well yesterday we travelled the country and met half way for the first time an had an amazing weekend away together! Lots of good food, drinks, dancing and laughs! Best friend for life!! Just thought I would...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 16 Responses 5 days ago

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    We met this morning. It was nice.

    I'm kinda bummed he flaked on our plans for later today. Next week he's starting his new department and I think it's going to be really hard to see each other now. I don't want to say good bye. I feel like it's going to fizzle out.
    OneStonedGirl OneStonedGirl 31-35, F 1 Response 12 mins ago

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    We met this morning. Excellent.

    He's supportive. So caring of me. Soon. I feel it soon that he and I will be able to be together again full time... It's just a feeling. But intuition for the job thing wasn't wrong and that's what I'm going on. My heart. My intuition. I'm not mad it's Friday.
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 15 Responses May 4, 2014

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    I'm still the other women

    and he's still the other man. The sex, the sex, the sex. How will I ever stop having this passionate of sex?
    spilledpurfume spilledpurfume 31-35, F 5 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 51 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    change. it seems to be what we all OW desire

    most. we all believe things will change, he'll leave her, "he'll settle down with me", he wont alwayd be hers and one day he'll be all to myself. we all know achieving this is almost impossible and the odds are so against us. but we stay. we love our MM. that seems crazy. doesnt...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    I have had a difficult morning.

    .. Though I failed to do the NC thing (miserably), he and I are not "back to normal" or anything. I am no longer in that usual cycle. Things are different. I have not seen him since Monday. We talk every day still, and exchange our "I love you's" and "I miss you's" but I know...
    DefinitelyDollie DefinitelyDollie 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 47 Responses Jan 10

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 153 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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