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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,640 People

    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    b4realz b4realz 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 80 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    To make you feel loveable you traded legitimate

    needs for an idealised self-image, self-exonerated and demanded I buy the story. I pointed out your mixed motives. Your unacknowledged needs leaked into a shadow side, tired of putting others first. And each time the needy eruption came, there followed the self-loathing of...
    JosephinaBallerina JosephinaBallerina 31-35, F 7 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 41-45, F 75 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    I officially work at mktg firm!

    Passed my 2nd interview. My team loves me and my trainer! They took me out to lunch and just went over about everything that that company do and what they expect. My trainer is most definitely attracted me and wants to know more about, lol. He even called me after my interview...
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 2 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I'M Emotionally Tired of it.

    few weeks ago mm went trough my phone and found messages i exchanged with my friends, he got mad and humiliated me in front if his best friend. Anyway we talked about it, and everything was fine ,i decided to cut ties with the guy i was texting (nothing but a friend ).because i...
    myrtle67 myrtle67 26-30, F 8 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    Hey all. Things are still progressing legally

    for him. He won a big battle this week in court. She only gets one hour of SUPERVISED visitation a week for now. If she acts up or doesn't pursue it she could lose any chance at custody. The Guardian ad Lie tum met w for the first time and was not impressed. W's own attorney...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I am obsessed with these lyrics.

    ....after our night together we vowed that when the time inevitably comes for our journey together to end there will be only happy tears and no regrets..... Taylor Swift - Wildest Dreams Red Lips are my signature.....💋 http://youtu.be/IdneKLhsWOQ
    SunshineGrey78 SunshineGrey78 36-40, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 5 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Hidden Dday. That's what I'm calling it.

    He shared with me again that she's been snooping my FB and IG, and went back to my IG and it was private. She's throwing my name all over the place and while her intuition is strong, there is nothing connecting me and him in the physical world... They got into a huge fight on...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 9 Responses 1 day ago

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    Hey everyone it's been

    while it's official I am single. She staying Pittsburg while her mom's in the hospital she felt like it's bad karma. For what she doing. I haven't been on for a while.
    LadyScorpio95 LadyScorpio95 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    OH. MY. GOD. It's final,

    he's single, and as of 9:37am today I am no longer the OW!!!
    Shardsofsorrow Shardsofsorrow 31-35, F 75 Responses Jul 29

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    Ladies do you think your mm has told anyone

    about you?? If he has admitted to confiding in a friend do you think that he's told multiple friends?? My mm has admitted to telling a couple of people but he promises that he never disclosed who I am. I just wonder if he's told more than what he admits. I've wondered if he's...
    Janna78 Janna78 46-50, F 11 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    Looking back it is funny how easily I fell into

    the trap of becoming 'the other woman.' The first flash of distress - a wounded soul no less, and I dived into the murky water. He told me that I was his oxygen. I was a mermaid Saint Bernard with the reviving elixir strapped to my neck. Strangely, I found two unmarried men...
    Faerylight Faerylight 41-45, F 19 Responses Jun 21

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 21

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    Ugh!!!! So MM has been staying with me a lot

    lately, after a convo they had about separating abs divorce. He slept over last night, and ended up calling in this morning because he was going to be really late anyway. I went to work. He went on my iPad and read through all my emails with a friend I met in this forum that's...
    4myhappy 4myhappy 31-35, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    This has been an emotional week.

    MM's STBX moved out of the marital home on September 1. For almost a month, it's hit him what he's lost. He's grieving. I'm depressed for him, for his family, for myself. When I talked about, "giving him space," he was upset at the innuendo that yet another relationship failed...
    HotPinkDaisy HotPinkDaisy 41-45, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    Is anyone having trouble signing in on their

    computer or is it only me. I can read but not post anything
    blue963 blue963 51-55, F 9 hrs ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Well, everyone. I saw him.

    We met at my house for a talk. He came into the house and just held me. Wouldn't let me go. He is completely broken. She has trampled him. He is giving up everything. His life long dream is to do a triathlon. He did part of one last weekend. But he won't continue training to do...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 18 Responses 1 day ago

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 48 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    Things have gotten chaotic in his world now.

    This is his journey. Have to keep reminding myself of that.
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 4 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I haven't posted here in a long,

    long time. Mostly it's because I had a hell of a D-day in early February. My H discovered the affair, confronted me & threatened to send his proof to MM's wife. I use the opportunity to end my marriage. And so did MM. But, we did not end it to be with each other. We took...
    crazycontrolled crazycontrolled 36-40, F 25 Responses Apr 30

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 42 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 19 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    For those of us who just ended things,

    or are hanging by a thread, the positive side of this freedom... No more watching them text back and forth like tweeners on our dates. No more lonely Sundays, feeling sad that it's an NC day. No more laying in bed every night wondering what they're doing in bed together. No...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 21 Responses Jul 12

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    Hello ladies I need help.

    I am married and have been seeing a guy for almost 2 years that has a girlfriend. Now I just found out that they got engaged 4 months ago. He never told me. I haven't told him I know. I need some advice as to how to handle it. Part of me just wants to go no contact and not say...
    beckyls beckyls 46-50, F 7 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 49 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 53 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    Well ... if I ever needed a swift kick to the

    head, I just got it. He showed up late one evening at a friends pub that she just acquired. Ended up just me, him, my friend and her significant other. Was a great time and we had a lot of fun, dancing, chatting .. just enjoying the evening. He and I made out for a while...
    Scorpionchild Scorpionchild 46-50, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 25

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    Update He is still upset with her

    for not wanting him to train, and in his mind killing his dream. He does seem to be coming out of the dark funk that he went into. I am still working in him to keep his bike. Not there yet but I see a light. I want to say " if you really want to **** her off sell it and buy an...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 3 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Tgif I cannot wait for this weekend to be over

    this anxiety is gna kill me..... Anyone else gna be missing their man bc u don't get to see them. Over long holiday weekends
    ap05 ap05 26-30, F 4 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 45 Responses Jan 10

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    I broke. I contacted ex-MM this morning.

    I don't even know why I did it. I'm still every bit as adamant about not going back down that road; I guess I just wanted to know I still could. And it turns out, I can. I knew that...kind of. Without he's been going through the same emotional repair that I have, I didn't...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 5 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    When all the mad just turns to sad .

    ... Knowing its for the best doesn't help the right now... Doesn't stop my chest from tightening and tears from streaming down my face when constant thoughts pop up... Four years I hold so many happy memories, will remembering them ever not make me burn with a missing so intense...
    elizabethmariejazz elizabethmariejazz 36-40, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 170 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    He asked, why I didn't get into an affair

    while I was married, and in a terribly intimacy-less situation. I was already going through the stress of a bad marriage and din't want to add to it with an affair. Then he said something very interesting. He said - 'It's not stress, it's the solution.' No, it's not, an...
    coolvolatile coolvolatile 31-35, F 3 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    I know I shouldn't do this but.

    ... Are you proud? Are you happy cuz you are the other woman??
    Healinghate Healinghate 18-21, M 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 16 Responses Feb 6

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 161 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Anyone who knows my story .

    .. Can you believe we had ANOTHER dday?? We broke up (after four years) about a month ago but after a short NC just days, we still communicate almost daily as "friends" and have slept together about once a week. It's been rough and even though I don't want him "back" (he will...
    elizabethmariejazz elizabethmariejazz 36-40, F 6 Responses