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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,299 People

    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    He's coming over today with the baby.

    We had a good talk. I'm still feeling cautious about the "relationship" though... I'm slowly getting more comfortable but it's proving to be a hard balance. I mean, what does one do when they've had their heart ripped out and then pieced back together? Sigh...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I agreed to being "FWB" with my MM,

    meaning we agreed not to take this too seriously or expect too much. I've mostly been able to control my emotions since I went into this with that expectation. But lately he calls or texts me nearly every day, and he tells me he misses me when he's away. We no longer save...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    Looking back it is funny how easily I fell into

    the trap of becoming 'the other woman.' The first flash of distress - a wounded soul no less, and I dived into the murky water. He told me that I was his oxygen. I was a mermaid Saint Bernard with the reviving elixir strapped to my neck. Strangely, I found two unmarried men...
    Faerylight Faerylight 41-45, F 17 Responses Jun 21

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    I'm about to break down

    and contact him......I'm really about to break. I'm losing it right now. Oh god help me smh
    plusisamust plusisamust 26-30, F 8 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 14 Responses Feb 6

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 45 Responses Jan 10

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    My latest with my AP.

    . Once again, he's resorting to the story of he needs to put our relationship on "pause" so he can find himself bc he doesn't know who he is. He says that he's coming back to our relationship and knows he will because he already has.. its just he wasn't ready to that's why he's...
    Melnmoose Melnmoose 36-40, F 5 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    Please read... any advice?

    MM and I had some kind of a fight tonight... or I think that's how he saw it. Then smack in the middle of it, he just stopped replying. I hate it when he does that. Makes me feel like he doesn't care about me or my feelings at all. It started when I asked if he wanted to play...
    ladyquaintrelle ladyquaintrelle 22-25, F 7 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    Trapped. Something I never imagined myself

    feeling. I'm an adult. I have the freedom to do as I please but today it really hit me hard that I can't go anywhere. I am stuck. Not just stuck, I am sinking. My husband is a sinking ship and he's taking me down with him. I sat down and had a serious talk with my sister. She...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 9 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    Happy Friday! Slowly,

    I'm moving away from the OW category despite yesterday's hiccup... Slowly I am realizing that he's seriously into me... Last night we talked for over an hour as we were going to bed- this is new, night time phone calls have replaced the texts- and his goodnight text to me? "I...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Holy annoying MM is aggravating.

    .. We were talking this morning and the convo went down a serious road. So as some of you may recall MMs wife found out he cheated in the winter. Lots of crap went down, he wound up in a psych ward bla bla. During this time we stopped our affair but remained friends. He...
    AvaLennon AvaLennon 31-35, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 50 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    Started to type what I was thinking

    but didn't. Maybe later today I will just say it. It isn't going to be pretty. Just needed to vent. My mood sucks right now.
    independentandstubborn independentandstubborn 51-55, F 10 Responses 1 day ago

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    So I just saw my mm and we pushed something to

    a department and the lady over there said push it back she didn't have room. I said I'm just doing what I'm told. She said oh I forgot your his girl you will do anything for him and made kissing noises. I just walked away and told him. He said OMG ppl have no life. He said I am...
    devin456 devin456 41-45, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    Can some people read my last experience

    and give me their opinions
    devin456 devin456 41-45, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    For those of us who just ended things,

    or are hanging by a thread, the positive side of this freedom... No more watching them text back and forth like tweeners on our dates. No more lonely Sundays, feeling sad that it's an NC day. No more laying in bed every night wondering what they're doing in bed together. No...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 19 Responses Jul 12

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    Ok I want to start with,

    he still has not ever said that he is going to leave her. But he agreed this week that he wanted this to be long term. And this afternoon we laid in bed and talked about how this all started. And he said he didn't know what came over him back then. Or why he sent me the...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 78 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    I haven't posted here in a long,

    long time. Mostly it's because I had a hell of a D-day in early February. My H discovered the affair, confronted me & threatened to send his proof to MM's wife. I use the opportunity to end my marriage. And so did MM. But, we did not end it to be with each other. We took...
    crazycontrolled crazycontrolled 36-40, F 24 Responses Apr 30

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    I had to get away today

    so I drove to a different town. I was surprised when I saw mm there with one of his friends. I hadn't talked to him since yesterday and assumed he was still resting. I was a little irritated he didn't tell me he was feeling better but I guess I don't need to know everything...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 4 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    These last few weeks have been very tough

    mentally for me. I apologise to many of my friends . I'm getting back on my feet now. I don't know if it was a mental block . I just lost interest in everything around me, and shut out everyone in my personal life, including to a certain extent my immediate family . I won't say...
    JohnCrighton JohnCrighton 51-55, M 4 hrs ago

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 21

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 160 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    It's been 3 yrs since I met this married man.

    . We have been in a distance relationship. He is an army guy and would promise me every year to come and visit me but he never keep his promise. Tonight I got a call ' He said I can't handle it anymore and it's over. Is this the respect I got as being the other women. Can someone...
    Mawip Mawip 22-25, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 50 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    Up down. Up down. Despite ALL the good,

    we are back in some funk. My heartaches, and I'm annoyed all at the same time. I don't know where the energy is different or even if it is but my instincts tell me he's "off" today. It's whatever I guess. I've prepared for these feelings for many moons now... Why should now...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I have a confession to make.

    I let my curiosity get the best of me just now. I usually have more self control than this and even though I knew it was a horrible idea, I couldn't stop myself. The internet can be a horrible thing! Yesterday he told me to look online for the new video of his drumline. Well I...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    Hey ladies had a wonderful evening last night

    ignored dr orders get back in game with my lady much happier mood and started back up with yoga.
    ForbiddenFruitLove95 ForbiddenFruitLove95 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    When will this end or progress?

    That stagnant unprogressive state.
    Sarahneeds Sarahneeds 26-30, F 2 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 41-45, F 75 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    I ended things for good yesterday.

    I think he was surprised, but it was a very emotional ending. He is a very strong person by nature, but I could tell he was hurting. He asked me if there was someone else. I told him no. I cannot even date with him in my life. I simply said I wanted more. He said I deserve more...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 22 Responses Mar 22

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    Been wondering about something.

    What are the signs when OM wants to stop the affair, I'm not sure about mine. He is constantly blowing hot and cold for the past few months, I haven't seen him since early April. He is going through a lot of stuff , job and city change. He is consistent about texting, but...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 7 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    On a "high" right now.

    MM and I hooked up, then spent hours talking and spooning. When I walked him out to his car, he turned around and kissed me right on the busy city street in broad daylight! Don't know if he's just getting careless, or if he's really ready to make this something more, but I'm...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 29 Responses May 6, 2014

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    Question for you all.

    ....if you suspected that your MM's wife may also be having an affair, would you say something to him or would you just sit back, mind your own business and let it unfold one way or the other?
    thelionsden13 thelionsden13 41-45, F 9 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    People say actions speak louder

    than words. What are some of the little things your mm does to let you know he cares? Also, I often hear, if there's a will there's a way. Do you think this is true? I mean if a man really wanted to see the woman he cared for, he'd find a way right? Just some random...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 9 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    Head's Up: This is a Rant.

    Things I can't tell him I am writing here. Judgement givers stay away. I'll start from the beginning. You said you understood. Did you? You must be fooling yourself. If you understood, there would be no fight for an overnight trip. You'd understand that when I have to put a...
    coolvolatile coolvolatile 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 42 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    My AP is still going through with the divorce.

    His W found someone else and has been that relationship for a couple of months. We picked it back up and for the past couple of weeks and he's been really considerate towards my feelings up until last night. We planned to go on a date this weekend however he wouldn't answer my...
    Melnmoose Melnmoose 36-40, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Here on EP I met another 'other woman'

    and we clicked. Almost a year ago now and we talk every single day. Well yesterday we travelled the country and met half way for the first time an had an amazing weekend away together! Lots of good food, drinks, dancing and laughs! Best friend for life!! Just thought I would...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Apr 19

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    Is it true men are real simple?

    If they stop texting and calling it is because they are not interested period? Just saw "He's not that into you". I am such a mess I just left the roller coster relationship I had and keep overthinking everything I am going crazy. Trolls I am in hell already don't rub it in...
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 2 Responses 4 hrs ago

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