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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,325 People

    I used to feel guilty

    but she treats him badly and doesnt deserve him so its me he comes to for fun
    jazzyB48 jazzyB48 46-50, F 1 Response 20 hrs ago

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    Here on EP I met another 'other woman'

    and we clicked. Almost a year ago now and we talk every single day. Well yesterday we travelled the country and met half way for the first time an had an amazing weekend away together! Lots of good food, drinks, dancing and laughs! Best friend for life!! Just thought I would...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Apr 19

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    OH. MY. GOD. It's final,

    he's single, and as of 9:37am today I am no longer the OW!!!
    Shardsofsorrow Shardsofsorrow 31-35, F 91 Responses 5 days ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 29 Responses May 6, 2014

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    Well, small update here.

    My MM since broaching the subject of divorce with W is in a very very different place. I'm quite surprised at his constant texting, talking of our future and being unbelievably kind and loving. It's clear to me he is starting to get his power back. Which is all I ever wanted for...
    LotusLIL LotusLIL 46-50, F 2 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 51 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    What app do you use to contact your mm

    so you don't get caught?
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 16 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 18 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    Sometimes it truly is the simple things

    that matter the most...... MM headed out of town for business today. Whenever he goes to this one town, he stays at a hotel that is on the waterway and every time he is there, he sends me a pic of the sunset by the pier. Today he sent me another one with a sad face 'no sunset...
    thelionsden13 thelionsden13 41-45, F 2 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    My Relationship Fast(RF) Update Day 10.

    Day Ten is a BEAUTIFUL DAY. I have gotten my groove back... My dance card is getting full again. I wish i would be writing a different version of day ten .. That said i woke up with the irrefutable knowledge and confidence that my Gentle soul MM was my pre- destined soul...
    Strawberrygiggles Strawberrygiggles 41-45, F 5 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    The gift basket delivered yesterday afternoon.

    I saw him later at work, he just stared at me while he walked past my dept. So a little later I called him from our work number. He was calm. He asked me why did I send him "that"? At first I act as if I didn't know what he was talking about. So he said "don't play with me why...
    plusisamust plusisamust 26-30, F 2 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    The end is near. I've felt it in my gut

    for a while now. Other things that I've felt over the past 20 something years that I have forgave, not just him but others. I believe that it's time for some real, honest answers.
    independentandstubborn independentandstubborn 51-55, F 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    I'm great. First time in a really long time

    that I feel great. Today he told a mutual friend/co worker that he had come over to my place this last Saturday. He told our boss that he was getting a divorce. He called me his girlfriend today- just to me, but I squealed. Today in my counseling session I was able to finally...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 13 hrs ago

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    So it's been a little over a month

    that I haven't talked to mm. I seen him cause he's a close of the family but the last time I saw him was about two weeks & I honestly could say I'm doing better. I don't miss him as much.
    confused7years confused7years 36-40, F 14 hrs ago

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 50 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    Ever have days where you just feel like giving

    up? I mean he hasn't done anything wrong really. But I'm questioning everything. Like maybe it'd be easier to stop now because most likely one day it'll all end in a lot of pain anyway. So maybe I should just cut out the middle and skip to the end to save myself from more hurt...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 17 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    I see my mm 2-3 times a week.

    It's been going on for years. Three years ago my H went on second shift so I am available every night, much like a single woman would be. My mm has a wife at home waiting for him every night. Anyways for most of our affair it's been me sending messages asking to hook up, I'd...
    Janna78 Janna78 46-50, F 3 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 45 Responses Jan 10

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    Thanks ladies for everything

    but I'm deleting my account. I just didn't get the support I thought I would all bc my married men are my bosses. It's ok I do have a friend who understands and is helping me thru this. Good luck to you all.
    devin456 devin456 41-45, F 2 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 21

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 17 Responses Mar 25

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    Counting down the days - Is is Saturday yet?

    Date Night Dinner and an evening together. His messages the past 2 days have been frequent and fun. But there is not a day that we do not speak. Our intimate physical connection is undeniable. We are committed to never letting it get boring and are honest about each other's...
    SunshineGrey78 SunshineGrey78 36-40, F 52 mins ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    In a bad mood and grumpy today.

    Taking a lot of restraint to stop myself lashing out and saying something hurtful to him. Please send me some strength to get through today and not break nc
    Prettybutterfly88 Prettybutterfly88 26-30, F 3 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    I've been awake two hours

    and all I've done is cry ... Listened to old voicemails just to hear his voice ... Was it all a lie that he lets me hurt so much
    elizabethmariejazz elizabethmariejazz 36-40, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    myrtle67 myrtle67 26-30, F 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 42 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    Loving two people... this photo

    and words changed my life's course. I could deny it any longer. I had to choose.
    LotusLIL LotusLIL 46-50, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Had another absolutely amazing night with him.

    A year and a half and it still keeps getting better. Feeling happy!
    wordweapon wordweapon 41-45, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 15 Responses Feb 6

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    I haven't posted here in a long,

    long time. Mostly it's because I had a hell of a D-day in early February. My H discovered the affair, confronted me & threatened to send his proof to MM's wife. I use the opportunity to end my marriage. And so did MM. But, we did not end it to be with each other. We took...
    crazycontrolled crazycontrolled 36-40, F 24 Responses Apr 30

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    Men really nurture their ego with us?

    What is it? Having control over us as a side dish? "Don't write I am home", "Don't write I am out of town, will see you when I come back", "Don't write I am spending the weekend with my wife doing things"... When can we write or see each other? Is there an app for the other...
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 12 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    11 long, terrible, days.

    When I have moments of acceptance that it's over, all I do is cry. Crying is a norm now. Then I have these moments of maybe it's not over ?? If I just give it some time ...? In those moments I'm at least not crying. Then the moments where I realize he goes on life as usual with...
    elizabethmariejazz elizabethmariejazz 36-40, F 11 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 160 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Every once in a while I peek at my mm's wife's

    Facebook page, although all I can see is her profile picture. It's always a picture of herself. For the first time ever she has a picture of her and her husband on vacation. Kind of a strange feeling!!! I'm sure I will look at it 500 times!!
    Janna78 Janna78 46-50, F 32 mins ago

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    My husband and I are talking about trying to

    have a baby. MM knew this would come eventually, we have talked about it a few times, but I haven't told him yet that it's now a real possibility. Even though I've been slowly pulling away and I have been feeling like things between us are ending, it's still hard and I don't...
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 78 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 170 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Looking back it is funny how easily I fell into

    the trap of becoming 'the other woman.' The first flash of distress - a wounded soul no less, and I dived into the murky water. He told me that I was his oxygen. I was a mermaid Saint Bernard with the reviving elixir strapped to my neck. Strangely, I found two unmarried men...
    Faerylight Faerylight 41-45, F 17 Responses Jun 21

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 53 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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