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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,976 People

    Upset and struggling tonight.

    Need some willpower but not sure where it comes from. Had brilliant night with the girls last night out dancing and drinking. Pretty much ignored my guy from 3pm as he said something I didn't like so I told him where to go. I wasn't that upset but used it as an excuse to be mad...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 4 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    He's working very hard to stay in touch.

    We never ever used to talk on the phone if we were off work. Now it seems that he is finding ways to call me on the weekends or days off in addition to texting all the time. It's always a nice surprise to hear from him.
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    I get that if he's married,

    then he's an mm... but what if he's now divorced? Mm doesn't seem like a fitting label for my former mm anymore...
    BeckstaOnSquidoo BeckstaOnSquidoo 26-30, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Seeing mine for almost a year.

    I know he loves me. Guilt finally catching up and he's pulled back. Can't see me or else he will want me. Talk when we can still. I hear his pain. What do I do? Do they usually pull back then realize they miss us and come back? My heart is broken. Thanks for any advice.
    greeneyes41 greeneyes41 41-45, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    he came over yesterday.

    we went and got a couple tattoo. we drank and he opened up to me even more. i ended up getting sick and slept 2 hrs while he was here. he then had to go home. after what he told me last night i woke up with a moral hangover. i just dont feel good doing this anymore. I've also...
    xalotlikex xalotlikex 22-25, F 3 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 9 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 16 Responses May 4

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    ok ladies I'm going personal here.

    I assume that some of the ow are married or have bf. are you also intimate with H or bf? if so is mm intimate with W? big question how is birth control and sexual health approached? this may go unanwered in public but I just wondered. pm me if you want. I'm a fertile mertile and...
    justinsneedow justinsneedow 41-45, F 1 Response 42 mins ago

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    Tonight will be our first full night together.

    No time constraints. No looking over our shoulders. We have a suite booked with a fireplace. Sushi & wine. I am so looking forward to 8 hours of normalcy. It is crazy we have never even eaten together. We spend our blips of time only focused on eachother. We get to talk for...
    tauriangirl tauriangirl 36-40, F 27 Responses Nov 15

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    It's sad that you can't really put what you

    want here cause others down you for it. Wishing I had someone to talk to about things....
    dsuzy dsuzy 36-40, F 8 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 29 Responses Oct 23

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 24 Responses May 6

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    Another week of very minimal to almost no

    contact with him. This is happening so much that i should start getting used to this...the end...but im still having a hard time. I told myself i wasnt gonna cry gor him anymore but i just can control it sometimes... Cried myself to sleep last night again. I woke up a couple of...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 84 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    So much for a slow rekindling.

    I get to spend the morning with him tomorrow and I absolutely cannot wait to see him. I will probably cry. It will be sixteen days since we saw each other. We talked for a long time yesterday. Talked about all the events that happened with his daughter. The suicide attempt. The...
    tauriangirl tauriangirl 36-40, F 5 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 51 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 41 Responses Feb 24

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    Sitting with family at dinner on Sunday,

    my brother, without knowing it, gave me a pretty good idea why men who are miserable in their marriages stay. After 13 years and one eight year old boy with his crazy wife, my brother finally is divorced. He is dating my best friend and is very happy for the first time in ages...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 31 Responses Sep 23

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 208 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    On vacation with my family

    and feeling disallusioned. I think its time to let go of my AP. He is also married and his wife was recently in the hospital. He pulled back and I feel like the truth is he will say anything to me so we can keep having sex... including love words and such. I am not sure...
    sweetplumeria sweetplumeria 36-40 2 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 46 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    Wow. I don't even know what to do right now.

    I'm in my bathroom crying, hiding from my husband. He just sent this to me: "How would you like me to act towards you? Because I seem to think I treat you pretty well. I don't want to come off as a **** but I'm getting sick of you saying I treat you bad or you taking advantage...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 4 Responses 57 mins ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 17 Responses Sep 10

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    I don't usually post stories.

    I get a lot out of reading experiences, and responding. But sometimes I feel sheepish for being a semi-lurker. So I will share my week without MM. It's a crazy time of year; everybody has more than enough on their plates, including me and MM. We had plans to see each other...
    TrulyMadlyDeeply38 TrulyMadlyDeeply38 41-45, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 2

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    We hit the 6 month mark.

    Never thought it would last this long. He's always on my mind, no matter what I'm doing. Is this normal???
    ladylove0113 ladylove0113 36-40, F 7 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    No trolls please (read previous stories he was

    NOT married when we were together) Dammit I miss you... Everything I do... Look at Think about Dream about Somehow relates to you How did you infect everything in my life so much? I feel like I can't function like a normal person without you.. I am not the kind of...
    jupsta jupsta 36-40, F 1 Response 12 hrs ago

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    Today i waited for his text all day

    and nothing....wasnt upset and actually kept myself busy at work...then out of nowhere he texts me asking how i am amd he says he thought about me all day...how ᤾??? Anyway, he told me i am a great person and he wishes he would have met me before he met his wife and be married...
    clamar44 clamar44 26-30, F 2 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    I gotta say, as much

    as I've been complaining about the holidays, I really can't wait to give my guy his present. Since the both of us are in a crappy financial place we agreed not to buy each other anything, but homemade gifts are okay. Its probably lame, but we're both huge music lovers (its one...
    SweetHeresy SweetHeresy 22-25, F 5 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 69 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    I really thought I'd be slightly distraught

    that we are both off for the next week but I'm actually quite content with everything. I really need the break from work and I know he does too. I think we've just gotten so close to each other recently that we can be okay with this. There's a confidence that we didn't have a...
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 81 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    Opinions please.... he had a work event today.

    Didnt tell me about it. So, I didnt go. He didn't chat this morning like he normally does. At lunch time, emails me missed me today. Does not chat but he stays on FB for 20 minutes Would you be irritated and confused?
    blue963 blue963 51-55, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    After his extremely rude behavior last night I

    decided to tell him everything I've been holding back. He hasn't responded and I have a feeling he won't. I think at this point, I'm pissed and hurt enough that I wouldn't care if this was the end. I really do love him but I know that I don't deserve to be treated this way. I've...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 4 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 148 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    What plans do you all have

    for Christmas? I will be home with family and doing the usual Christmas stuff. Minimal company for Christmas Eve and the same for Christmas Day.
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 8 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    How do you guys do it?

    How do you end it? How? I want to but I can't... It's like, impossible! Maybe I should just let it run its course... I don't know. I love him so much. But I know this can't go on forever. Which I'm ok with. But I just don't think he loves me like he says he does. I think he...
    asta20 asta20 31-35, F 3 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Today is a difficult day

    for me. One year ago today I was in an emergency room by myself all night losing an unplanned but not unwanted pregnancy that occurred two years into my relationship. I couldn't reach him until morning and had no one to help me... How to explain?? This was my lowest low, in pain...
    elizabethmariejazz elizabethmariejazz 36-40, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    My MM and I have been seeing each other

    for 7 months now, and who knows if this will last or not. But regardless, we are in a wonderful relationship where we both have the same expectations. Neither of us will leave our spouses but when we are together there is magic between us. My MM is the best lover I've ever...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 50 Responses Feb 16

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 162 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 40 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 16 Responses Jun 2

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