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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,683 People

    This holiday season is f***ing depressing.

    I don't even know why I feel that way...it's not cause of the whole "my boyfriend's married" thing (I've felt that way even before him)...it just sucks. Hasn't been the same since I moved out at 18 and most of my family moved away. But I will try to enjoy the day. I'm hoping...
    SweetHeresy SweetHeresy 22-25, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 78 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Had to see him today.

    Didn't see him yesterday, won't see him the rest of the week. Needed my fix. He didn't have time until the end of the day, on account of he had ro drive his adult sons all over town. We only had an hour between his son duties and mine. We had a beer and a chat. He seemed weird...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 1 Response 10 hrs ago

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    The snow is falling and it made

    for a lighthearted day on the job when combined with it being the day before a holiday. This gave us that unexpected time to hang out with each other. The day started good with him calling me first thing. We got to see each other more than usual. We definitely needed this I...
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 2 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 41 Responses Feb 24

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    So today my MM and I went to lunch.

    He kept saying how beautiful I was and so on. He then initiated our first kiss. However, he freaked out a little. I found it interesting that I felt no guilt whatsoever and I am married too. Don't know where all of this is headed. Just taking it one day at a time. I do know i...
    Oceanoftears Oceanoftears 41-45, F 1 Response 12 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 46 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 8 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    I'm pretty sure it's over,

    and it was my choice. It's funny.....when it's my choice I'm content. I'm not checking my phone wanting him to miss me or change his mind, it just is what it is. I always wondered if I'd get to the point that I knew it wasn't serving me anymore and if I'd be strong enough to...
    PrincessLolita PrincessLolita 26-30, F 3 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    We broke up At least I think we have I really

    have no clue The police called at 6:45am said they had spoken with him.. And he was with her... That it's his job to call me and tell me what's up... The officer said she informed him to call me and settle up I can't wrap my head around any of this... I unblocked his wife and...
    jupsta jupsta 36-40, F 10 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 40 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    And from paradise To nightmare How can this

    be? Night 2 I'm up all night worried about him again!! How is this fair? He called me and said he had to report to he police station ... And that he would call me back Then nothing all night again I have called the police stations... He hasn't been arrested His room...
    jupsta jupsta 36-40, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    Happy Thanksgiving ladies.

    I hope you all have a great holiday. For my Canadian friends and others. Happy Thursday. Almost Friday. Enjoy your day. We have a lot to be thankful for. I am thankful for you all. You means lot to me.
    Gingersmiles Gingersmiles 41-45, F 4 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    Annnnd he emailed and it hurts

    and I didn't respond back and I'm wondering now again why I'm doing NC. I hate this: All perky happy thanksgiving quick sentences have to go out of town friends Mom passed away I feel like a jerk not saying something. That one stings a little
    Readytomoveon2015 Readytomoveon2015 31-35, F 6 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Day 14 I was off a day this morning :.

    Starts in 23 minutes annnnd I'm not certain NC will continue I'm losing my will I miss my MM I don't want to purposely hurt him. I know he won't my email until Sunday anyway so I'm trying to hold out until Monday. I keep telling myself there's no reason to just sit in his email...
    Readytomoveon2015 Readytomoveon2015 31-35, F 1 Response 10 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    I need some perspective on what's going on with

    my MM. We have been together a year now. We have sex on average 4-5 times a week and some weeks everyday. Now there are times when we don't. We do other things like movies, dinner, shopping etc. We had NC for 15 days. Since being back together the first time we hashed things...
    Lust2much Lust2much 31-35, F 9 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    Day 3 nc has been harder

    than I thought out would be. I almost texted him twice and now I'm at work which is when we usually talk a lot. So to help me get through work here's a question... What's the longest you've gone without talking to your mm? Was it a choice or did it just happen that way?
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 14 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    So what are everyone's plans

    for Thanksgiving and more importantly, what are you all thankful for? I will start with how thankful I am for all you ladies, and a few gentlemen. And the obvious is that I'm thankful for that amazing guy.
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 42 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Almost 2 weeks NC I almost call him today

    but I was strong. Some days I am depressed. Some I miss him terribly. Some I hate him. The truth is he hasn't tried to contact me. 😞that hurts a lot
    babyle82 babyle82 31-35, F 3 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 51 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 50 Responses Feb 16

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    Dat 18 without any interaction with my

    co-worker MM. Saw him today and tried chatting, but he kept it professional. I think this is probably the start of one of our "breaks" that last 4-5 months.
    BPMM BPMM 26-30, F 3 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    I have a question about the way things are btwn

    you and your MM. When I was in University I took an Anthro (not the clothing store!) class. One of the things we discussed was the "phenomena of love," and that it's generally a 2-year period of passion that wanes and become more about the business of having/negotiating a...
    TrulyMadlyDeeply38 TrulyMadlyDeeply38 41-45, F 6 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I feel so angry at myself.

    I was worrying about something and contacted MM. Why worry him over nothing over this now. I hope he don't think I want him back.
    stupid28 stupid28 31-35, F 1 hr ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 148 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 29 Responses Oct 23

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    Well last night I told him

    that I love him. The only problem with this: I told him this when I was **** faced and hugging the porcelain god. I will have to wait to see how he responds to me because today is a NC day. I made him leave when I knew I was getting sick and as he was walking out the door I...
    JuliaH JuliaH 41-45, F 1 Response 2 hrs ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 15 Responses Jun 2

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 162 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Tonight will be our first full night together.

    No time constraints. No looking over our shoulders. We have a suite booked with a fireplace. Sushi & wine. I am so looking forward to 8 hours of normalcy. It is crazy we have never even eaten together. We spend our blips of time only focused on eachother. We get to talk for...
    tauriangirl tauriangirl 36-40, F 29 Responses Nov 15

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    I have a question for you ladies.

    ..this came to me cause of something that happened last night. Are you or your mm a jealous person? We went out last night to the bar to see some friends of ours play, well a friend of mine showed up and I couldn't wait for her to meet my guy, so she gives me a hug and I tell her...
    sensitiveme sensitiveme 31-35, F 4 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    How is it possible to miss someone

    so much? I know there will be no contact since he is with family during the holiday weekend. I miss him very much but should be use to it by now. Just need to learn how to turn off my heart.
    Lost4him2 Lost4him2 26-30 5 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 208 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    It's not your fault you didn't know,

    You didn't know when we met how badly I needed someone, you didn't know it was one of my worst days, how my spirit was crushed and how my husband was too busy to visit with me that night or ever. You didn't know for the first 5 minutes how well we were going connect and we...
    Readytomoveon2015 Readytomoveon2015 31-35, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 68 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    His mom is at the hospital

    and he received bad news today. They said she doesnt have much time left. It bothers me so much not being able to be with him right now, not being able to even talk to him on the phone to help him get thru this. I know he is emotionally screwed trying to keep it together. I just...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 2 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    I mailed him the night

    before last saying i wouldnt be on chat yst morning as i was feeling a bit hurt by his attitude to will we/wont we go in to full nc mode...yst afternoon i had a mail from him saying he is going crazy with everything and thinks in time out of sight/out of mind will work since...
    Jellytots2412 Jellytots2412 36-40, F 2 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 17 Responses Sep 10

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 2

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    Hi there. Just want to ask you all a few

    questions that I'm interested to know the answers to. How long have you been together? Are you both married? What's the age difference? The weekend is in its way and can be a difficult time - keep a smile on your dial 😄
    baab2 baab2 41-45, F 17 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    He's with the W for the Thanksgiving holiday.

    He needed to go so she wouldn't spite him and ruin his chance of getting a green card. He also needs pics for his immigration interview. Right after thanksgiving, he's going to his home country as his visa expires at the end of the month. He's going to come back when they call...
    Doloboo85 Doloboo85 26-30, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    And so today.... The ex confirm the pregnancy.

    She told him that she "wants to keep the baby but he doesn't want anything to do with it and wishes things were different". So basically she is doing a back and forth on him of will keep it will not. Whatever at this point in my mind she is keeping it. So today he begs me...
    nolasanchez30 nolasanchez30 31-35, F 4 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    I am a very lucky woman,

    I found an amazing man. I did not expect to hear from him at all today. We are far apart, and both have families, so with the holiday and all....he knows that I have to go to the MIL's birthday at 10 [the woman has hated me forever, after all I was the wrong religion, and not...
    whynot13 whynot13 46-50, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 24 Responses May 6

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