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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 9,456 People

    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Why do all the haters say you're always going

    to be second choice? Maybe we are second choice when he "has" to go home but in reality we aren't second choice in his heart or his mind. I can almost promise that he's thinking about me more than his wife. I can almost promise his heart is starting to lead him else where and...
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 88 Responses Aug 10

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    Just when I thought I'm not contacting him.

    He contacts me. I swear they know when we're backing off. And again I was weak. He said he loved me and loves what we have and enjoys our time together. But it's been 3 weeks. And he's made no plans to see me. I'm tired of initiating spending time together.
    123Frozen 123Frozen 31-35, F 2 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    RedSheep 2 please get in touch with Monabrown

    you are going thru the same things, maybe you can support each other for NC.
    blue963 blue963 46-50, F 2 hrs ago

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    I am so ******* stupid.

    Why or how could I have done this to myself? I finally contacted him today, to let him know how I have been feeling. He told me to call him because he was waiting for a tow truck. So I called him and explained how I was feeling. I wasn't very eloquent about it, I stumbled...
    ArlingtonRose ArlingtonRose 31-35, F 9 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    ...and I'm being cheated on too.

    My life is just one big twisted mess and I can't bring myself to make a decision over what to do. I didn't become involved with a MM because of what was happening at home. I can't make excuses but it really did just happen......We both knew it was wrong but we fell for each...
    MaxineJosef MaxineJosef 31-35, F 5 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    Today is proving difficult only 3 days in

    feeling like I'm going to cave back into him..... I am going to read some more experiences hopefully this will re strengthen me to leave him..... It's so hard ...... Grrrrrrrrr!!!! I really want my own man.... Someone to wake up too but after two years I need to do this...
    Monabrown Monabrown 26-30, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    "I’m not going to be the girl you marry,

    but I’ll be the girl you’ll be thinking of 20 years from now while you engage in polite sex with your boring wife who fakes her ****** to make you feel better about your receding hairline. " Yep!!
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 6 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 2

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    ****, I didn't think he'd do it

    but he has, he ******* told her about us.
    hankpalmer hankpalmer 18-21, F 3 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Not the other woman since she found out about me

    and dumped his ***! Unfortunately I'm part of the fall out though as he collects his thoughts and has dumped me. Part of me feels it's temporary as usual as he works out his feelings, but part of me thinks this is his opportunity to do the travelling he wants to do before he...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 16 hrs ago

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    Just had a three hour conversation with him on

    the phone after he told his wife about us, it was fine but he seemed distant toward the end when I asked where it left us and what would happen next, which is to be expected. Said he would still like to see me as friends and that we just have to be careful because he doesn't...
    hankpalmer hankpalmer 18-21, F 1 Response 18 mins ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 18 Responses May 4

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 22 Responses May 6

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 30 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    Listened to this song this morning

    and fell in love with it instantly. http://youtu.be/fjvMz79bYl8
    kc5316 kc5316 22-25, F 7 hrs ago

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    Hi ladies. So I am not here to judge ANYONE,

    I'm just curious. Are there limits? Would you cheat if you were married? Would you cheat with your partners friend or colleague? Would you cheat with the husband of an acquaintance? A friend? Are there lies you would be unwilling to tell for him or to be with him...
    RoseColouredGlasses RoseColouredGlasses 26-30, F 12 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 73 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Went to see SG last night.

    Had a great time. Had 4 missed calls from MM while I was with him. Part of me feels bad but part of me doesn't. There's been numerous times when he hasn't called or txt
    Sidechic79 Sidechic79 31-35, F 4 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    Shows up at my house this morning

    when he's supposed to be at work. He knows I'm pretty much sick of this. Doesn't want to lose me, Blah blah blah... I ask him to leave and the following texts commence .. Him :you are all I think about I just don't have the energy to tell you that all the time Me: have I ever...
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 4 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    Don't know what's with the rain lately.

    He's feeling sick today and I just want to take him home and take care of him :( He asked if I've had a chance to change my windshield wipers. Oops no. Been meaning to do that for a few months. Well he says he will be back and comes in with an empty box. Uhhhhh what did he do...
    Risktakingflirtation Risktakingflirtation 22-25, F 8 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 143 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Well it happened again last night.

    We have a fun time out drinking, eating, watching the game with some friends... We go back home (yep... I called his place home)... Everything is going well, about to crawl in bed and he snaps at me. He asked me again exactly how things ended between our boss and I (had a fling...
    RedHotPepper RedHotPepper 26-30, F 2 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 163 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 16 Responses Jun 2

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 68 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    Broke things off with my MM.

    After he compared me to his wife I kept getting a little more angry everytime I thought about it so I told him once he compared me to the wife, it was time for me to move on. We love each other but we are both so stubborn this will finish the relationship. I have a small sense...
    Gossipgirl1408 Gossipgirl1408 41-45, F 13 mins ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 20 Responses 6 days ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 43 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    The saddest thing about this,

    for me, is I let all my other relationships fall to the waste side.. unnurtured and neglected. My two best friends are him and his wife!! I am so mad at myself. I am craving him like a freaken cigarette. Just itching to say something. He's sent several messages letting me know...
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 10 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    Another great ending to the work day.

    I love when things fall right into place when you least expect them to. Glad I wore my thigh highs today.
    surfandturf surfandturf 36-40, F 2 Responses 36 mins ago

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    Today, I'm trying not to initiate.

    .. make myself more unavailable, but I'm itchy! Must. hold. out...
    Ahmazing Ahmazing 31-35, F 3 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    My Secret Gold Coin

    You don’t know it, but I think of you as a beautiful, precious, shiny gold coin that I keep secretly hidden in my pocket. I feel happy knowing that you are in there, but unhappy knowing that you have to stay hidden. I wish I could show you off to friends, but they wouldn’t...
    jenn80 jenn80 51-55 18 Responses May 23, 2013

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    I can't help but shake the feeling

    that he's going to end this. He can't get over my past even though he's known about it this whole 2.5 years. I can't stand not being around him. He's my best friend but I feel like he's growing distant from me. I'm not sure how the divorce is going, since I don't ask. Is that a...
    RedHotPepper RedHotPepper 26-30, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 43 Responses Feb 24

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 37 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    It's past midnight, I couldn't help

    but shed some tears again. I hope it's just my usual PMS. A huge wave of past memories and sadness are drowning me, I hate moments like this so much! I can never text you again for any personal reason. I haven't for almost a year now, even when I'm overly intoxicated. Strictly...
    lostsoul0311 lostsoul0311 26-30, F 1 Response 15 hrs ago

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    Things I don't miss from my affair.

    .. 1. Waiting for my phone to ding 2. Lying to spouse about where I am going 3. Making sure I erase texts 4. Time 5. Mind control that the affair holds not mm 6. Questioning of myself and actions 7. Guilt not for the affair but for my husband and his wife 8. Time 9. The panic...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 15 Responses Apr 27

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    I think I have finally came to the realization

    that this affair is over. We rarely see one another, and hardly talk anymore. I can see now that ever since his new baby was born, all I have become to him is a FWB (friend with benefits)gal. The question I have, for those who have ended your affairs, how did you do it? Did you...
    freddiesgirl69 freddiesgirl69 41-45, F 6 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 81 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 48 Responses Feb 16

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    I met my MM on location

    for a project at work... he is also my mentor and taught me a lot. He kissed me initially just to play around but things got serious and we fell in love. He has one small child at home with his wife, and I've heard him answer her phone calls... she berates him and treats him...
    velvetnico velvetnico 31-35, F 1 Response 13 hrs ago

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 5 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    Just had our night together.

    What a night. I'm so lucky to have him in my life I don't doubt his love even though we can't be together. Not a day goes by without contact,he is my rock He just blows me away
    sooty1977 sooty1977 36-40, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    Is it just me thinking it

    or has everything gone mental these past few days for all of us? Full moon or something?!
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 4 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    And my worst nightmare can come true.

    ...I got a text from his phone, it said "who is this?" I deleted the text. Then I sat here and kept thinking, what texts could she have found knowing him I'm thinking just ones he got after he got really bad. If she puts my number in her phone she will know who it is. Thus is...
    leigh8133 leigh8133 31-35, F 5 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    I realized that the OW really break my heart

    because I know what its like to be one. But how can you help women in this situation without admitting it publicly. I have a new business that I am starting and would like to incorporate something like that into it, but the risks are too great. I have a family to protect and...
    blue963 blue963 46-50, F 1 Response 2 hrs ago

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