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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,957 People

    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 50 Responses Feb 16

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    Ok ladies tell me your first thought

    or reaction on this conversation. MM gave me his happy meal toy like he always does and It was a penguin water gun. MM: did you squirt anyone yet? Me: no I'll only do that to you MM: go ahead.....make my day Any thoughts or reactions?
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 3 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    Eeeeekkk!!!! Going to see the Nutcracker Ballet

    tonight with my man. Getting all dressed up in a black dress and him in a suit and going out to a fancy dinner beforehand! Then probably Xmas shopping with him Saturday and then we get to go to my work Xmas party. It's gonna be a great weekend! Sooo excited! Then again, any time...
    sensitiveme sensitiveme 31-35, F 4 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 162 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Gah!! He's so trying to get a rise out of me.

    I won't let him win. He was texting me while at the tire shop. He told me there was eye candy there and if I gave him permission, he would take her in the alley and... **** her.... Jeezus H!!! What the hell? Is that any way to talk to a woman you supposedly jar deep feelings for...
    sugarbabysub sugarbabysub 31-35, F 5 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I defiantly don't think mm is going to remember

    that it's my birthday and I thought I'd be mad but I don't mind. It's just one day. His wife decided to spend the weekend with her OM so he asked me to come stay the night with him tomorrow. That's the best birthday gift ever, even if he doesn't realize it. I hope everyone...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 13 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    Ahhh this life !!! A week of trying to have

    real time together ... On both our parts ... And things just kept getting in the way! We had many conversations and daily quick meets ... But the time to really relax together or go out for hours wasn't too be. His work got in the way and then last night finally everything fell...
    elizabethmariejazz elizabethmariejazz 36-40, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 2

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 40 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 55 Responses Nov 6

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 17 Responses Sep 10

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 69 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    I'm not really 'the other woman' anymore cause

    they are getting a divorce.. But he's still married to her and she's got his kids she will always be part of the picture. I feel like the other woman still. She hasn't let him see the kids barely at all. He had them for one overnight since the end of October. Anyway.. To him...
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 4 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    Sitting with family at dinner on Sunday,

    my brother, without knowing it, gave me a pretty good idea why men who are miserable in their marriages stay. After 13 years and one eight year old boy with his crazy wife, my brother finally is divorced. He is dating my best friend and is very happy for the first time in ages...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 32 Responses Sep 23

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 51 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    to those of us going through the breakup stage

    or even thinking about it, our situation is what it is(a necessary evil perhaps, but it has/had to be done). you have to stop trying to convince our hearts otherwise, it's a battle some of us we'll never win. That's why part of the reason you hold onto him so strongly/tightly...
    iheartnono iheartnono 31-35 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 148 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Weight off my shoulders - to say the very least.

    I compiled a lengthy letter to my 'MM'. Everything I have felt - wanted to say - but hadn't. We met at my office - I wanted a quiet place with no interruptions. I explained the letter before I gave it to him. I explained how 'nervous' i was feeling about it. It was exactly what...
    AdelW AdelW 22-25, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    So this is insane. Someone please tell me it is

    and it's not just me. My guy is divorcing his wife, and at first she wanted that too but then changed her mind and wanted them to try and fix things. She was very vocal from the beginning that she was going to keep the kids from him and unless he agreed to do what she wanted...
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 10 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 16 Responses May 4

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 41 Responses Feb 24

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 81 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Wow, I feel like such a fool.

    His phone got shut off on Monday. I asked why he didn't email me like he has in the past. He said he did and then I remembered, I deleted that email account two weeks ago! I forgot to tell him. Oops. I'm glad I waited.
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    Help, I'm hating the holidays already!

    I just finished work for 2 weeks and feeling sorry for myself as MM is busy and we hardly had any contact today. I miss him so much it's almost like a physical ache. He feels the same. And the thought of taking time off and not spending it together is horrible. Instead we will...
    daisyblue222 daisyblue222 36-40, F 31 mins ago

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    I have never posted -but sincerely appreciate

    every other woman's posts, support, and understanding of us! Came across the site over a year ago and have just been taking everything in! trying to relate to someone that has had a D day -but has managed to continue the relationship because he states "the only person that will...
    yuckyuck16 yuckyuck16 46-50, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 16 Responses Jun 2

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    do you trust your mm?

    sometimes i feel like a fool because i trust him.
    xalotlikex xalotlikex 22-25, F 20 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 46 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    We had such a good time last night.

    The place we went ended up having team trivia night and we made a great team. He's going to be off work for quite awhile during the next few weeks for Christmas and New Years, but we'll try to see each other when we can. He said last night was our Christmas together and he...
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    Advise: What excuses do you make up to tell h

    when you wanna see your mm? something that will not make him suspicious at all? Also on short notice and in nightime! Just curious. You can reply privatly if you want to.
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 5 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Seeing red today!!! His ex is hoping

    for a F...ing Xmas miracle! She asked him to be her date tonight to her work Xmas party! I swear to God! And tomorrow he is supposed to be taking her to supposedly end her pregnancy. Can't believe this story is still carrying on. Just wish she would be honest to him and say that...
    nolasanchez30 nolasanchez30 31-35, F 3 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 208 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    when one door shuts .

    .....Another opens .Poor baby his son is so sick and i am so worried for him .I hope he went to see him .Knowing his selfish W ,he probably couldn't waiting is the one thing I hate to do .........
    peachy115 peachy115 51-55, F 20 hrs ago

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    Hi there. My phone has been down

    and I have missed you all! Hope things are going ok. Into the Christmas holidays which are bittersweet and thinking of you all. My man is away with family and I'm home with family - I will miss him but we are lucky to be able to text. Take care x
    baab2 baab2 41-45, F 18 hrs ago

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 29 Responses Oct 23

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    Tonight will be our first full night together.

    No time constraints. No looking over our shoulders. We have a suite booked with a fireplace. Sushi & wine. I am so looking forward to 8 hours of normalcy. It is crazy we have never even eaten together. We spend our blips of time only focused on eachother. We get to talk for...
    tauriangirl tauriangirl 36-40, F 28 Responses Nov 15

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    well I think I'm with the wrong guy.

    the trust like you all speak of isn't there. for instance he supposedly arrived at W house today before noon called me twice from the road. we don't usually text or call each other when he's there. so around 6pm I receive a text from him "I'm here" I reply ' where? same "I'm...
    justinsneedow justinsneedow 41-45, F 6 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    I haven't posted here

    since March, mostly because my mm became very sick and battled for his life this whole time. I came back here to update that he passed away from cancer this morning. I'm grieving. It wasn't supposed to end like this. We had just begun something magical. I truly loved and adored...
    youngconfuzedteacher youngconfuzedteacher 26-30, F 16 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Tomorrow is the last day we will see each other

    until the work week following Christmas. I can say that we have definitely spent some quality time together. Today the office cleared out early and I happened to be walking by. He talked to me for a few minutes and said I should visit him before I went home. I finished up my...
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 11 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    ok I overreacted. he called first thing this

    morning as soon as he dropped daughter off at school. asked why I keep flipping out, I'm crazy and need to relax and trust him. he said he could come home today after he picks daughter up if I want him to. however if he stays until Sunday that's when W sells her stuff and is...
    justinsneedow justinsneedow 41-45, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    This is a tough and lonely time of year.

    Tough and lonely decisions to be made. Chin up for all the joy, but more strength needed to get through the pain. Everyone in this forum FOR ME, have been wonderful - I am grateful you all have been here to "listen" ..... Better year ahead .... we ALL deserve that.
    kitty1958 kitty1958 56-60, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    baab2 baab2 41-45, F 1 Response 18 hrs ago

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    After being together last Thursday,

    I heard nothing from him. I caved and called his work Sat but he couldn't talk long & said he was going to call me when he had more time/privacy to talk. Sunday-Wednesday still no contact. He told me last week about the new job he is doing during the week & the hours. I know he...
    forbidden67 forbidden67 46-50, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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