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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,952 People

    Do you think, "she stole him from me" is a

    valid feeling? BM truly believes that I "stole" her H from her. I don't understand why one would blame the OW as opposed to her own husband for leaving/divorcing her... Part of me is flattered, and the other part of me feels like I'm being blamed while it takes two to tango...
    list411 list411 22-25, F 14 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 51 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 84 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    This is a tough and lonely time of year.

    Tough and lonely decisions to be made. Chin up for all the joy, but more strength needed to get through the pain. Everyone in this forum FOR ME, have been wonderful - I am grateful you all have been here to "listen" ..... Better year ahead .... we ALL deserve that.
    kitty1958 kitty1958 56-60, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 41 Responses Feb 24

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    He showed up where I didn't expect him to.

    . last night, a Christmas party. Acting as if nothing's wrong, drinking. I wasn't very kind to him. All the hurt and disregard was too much. This morning, I sent him this: "It's time.. I'm sure you agree. I'm not a nice person around you anymore.. this past year has been...
    Scorpionchild Scorpionchild 46-50, F 4 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 208 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    well I think I'm with the wrong guy.

    the trust like you all speak of isn't there. for instance he supposedly arrived at W house today before noon called me twice from the road. we don't usually text or call each other when he's there. so around 6pm I receive a text from him "I'm here" I reply ' where? same "I'm...
    justinsneedow justinsneedow 41-45, F 5 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I found the perfect gift

    for my MM. It hasn't shipped yet though so I'm afraid it won't be here before Christmas! I just hope he can explain it to his W because once I saw it I knew I had to get it for him.
    blurrdlines blurrdlines 36-40, F 4 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I'm not really 'the other woman' anymore cause

    they are getting a divorce.. But he's still married to her and she's got his kids she will always be part of the picture. I feel like the other woman still. She hasn't let him see the kids barely at all. He had them for one overnight since the end of October. Anyway.. To him...
    megansunshine megansunshine 18-21, F 4 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    i was talking to him on the phone last night.

    i told him for Christmas i wanted him on new years eve. i get the whole well my family gets together and how do u think i can get out of it. i said tell them you're working. he said i already told them i wasnt working the holidays. all i could say was of course you did...
    xalotlikex xalotlikex 22-25, F 21 hrs ago

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    Tonight will be our first full night together.

    No time constraints. No looking over our shoulders. We have a suite booked with a fireplace. Sushi & wine. I am so looking forward to 8 hours of normalcy. It is crazy we have never even eaten together. We spend our blips of time only focused on eachother. We get to talk for...
    tauriangirl tauriangirl 36-40, F 28 Responses Nov 15

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    Wow, I feel like such a fool.

    His phone got shut off on Monday. I asked why he didn't email me like he has in the past. He said he did and then I remembered, I deleted that email account two weeks ago! I forgot to tell him. Oops. I'm glad I waited.
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 8 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 46 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 16 Responses May 4

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 17 Responses Sep 10

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    I hate how anxious I get waiting

    for him to text me after his day off. Not sure why...not like something is magically gonna change overnight to make him decide not to talk to me anymore lol. I've always trusted this man unwaiveringly. I want to keep believing him, especially because he's done nothing to make...
    SweetHeresy SweetHeresy 22-25, F 3 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 24 Responses May 6

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    Eeeeekkk!!!! Going to see the Nutcracker Ballet

    tonight with my man. Getting all dressed up in a black dress and him in a suit and going out to a fancy dinner beforehand! Then probably Xmas shopping with him Saturday and then we get to go to my work Xmas party. It's gonna be a great weekend! Sooo excited! Then again, any time...
    sensitiveme sensitiveme 31-35, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 29 Responses Oct 23

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    Breaking up isn't alwaysthe answer to closure.

    ....... Not all the scars show, therefore not all the wounds will heal. I guess it's safe to say that sometimes you can't see the pain that someone else is feeling...........
    iheartnono iheartnono 31-35 1 Response 18 hrs ago

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    He got to work 15 minutes ago

    and already came to visit. When he's in a good mood, he's really good!
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 2 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 55 Responses Nov 6

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 40 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    do you trust your mm?

    sometimes i feel like a fool because i trust him.
    xalotlikex xalotlikex 22-25, F 20 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 9 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    Ok ladies tell me your first thought

    or reaction on this conversation. MM gave me his happy meal toy like he always does and It was a penguin water gun. MM: did you squirt anyone yet? Me: no I'll only do that to you MM: go ahead.....make my day Any thoughts or reactions?
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 2 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    Gah!! He's so trying to get a rise out of me.

    I won't let him win. He was texting me while at the tire shop. He told me there was eye candy there and if I gave him permission, he would take her in the alley and... **** her.... Jeezus H!!! What the hell? Is that any way to talk to a woman you supposedly jar deep feelings for...
    sugarbabysub sugarbabysub 31-35, F 5 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 69 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    I have never posted -but sincerely appreciate

    every other woman's posts, support, and understanding of us! Came across the site over a year ago and have just been taking everything in! trying to relate to someone that has had a D day -but has managed to continue the relationship because he states "the only person that will...
    yuckyuck16 yuckyuck16 46-50, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 50 Responses Feb 16

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    I fear we are nearing a D Day.

    He and his boss had a meeting at my office yesterday (not my project so I wasn't there) As they left his boss said "well you are sleeping with one of them". My mm told him not to go there. Then also yesterday an old employee of his asked him who the "little hottie was" that he...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 3 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 81 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 16 Responses Jun 2

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    Oh boy, so we have a really big office.

    My guy had a meeting with a couple of my coworkers yesterday. One is a real busybody. The other coworker who is a friend of both of ours (not aware of the affair) is giving him a hard time about not being on his bike lately and MM starts teasing back about me, knowing that's...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 16 hrs ago

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    Tomorrow is the last day we will see each other

    until the work week following Christmas. I can say that we have definitely spent some quality time together. Today the office cleared out early and I happened to be walking by. He talked to me for a few minutes and said I should visit him before I went home. I finished up my...
    surfsway surfsway 36-40, F 11 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 148 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Okay. Advice please. It's been four days

    since I've talked to him. Last Saturday we had an overnight and we chatted for a little bit Sunday night after my car broke down but I haven't heard from him since. I always thought if you cared about someone you would want to know how they're doing. It makes no sense to me. Two...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 17 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    animalbuck animalbuck 26-30, M 2 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    baab2 baab2 41-45, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    I haven't posted here

    since March, mostly because my mm became very sick and battled for his life this whole time. I came back here to update that he passed away from cancer this morning. I'm grieving. It wasn't supposed to end like this. We had just begun something magical. I truly loved and adored...
    youngconfuzedteacher youngconfuzedteacher 26-30, F 7 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 2

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