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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,613 People

    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 41-45, F 75 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Okay. I'm laughing. But annoyed all at the same

    time and need to share so I'm not perseverating over here on this so I can actually work. Quick back story regarding mutual friend of MMs that I've been talking about. When his sons bday party happened and he said that she was coming and I wasn't invited (for obvious reasons...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 5 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    So..still trying to find a single replacement

    for MM. I was with him last night after not seeing him for a week. He was extra sugar sweet. He kept telling me that I fill a void in his life that he never knew was there until we got together. He told me he loves me. He has told me this many times before but it's been a long...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 5 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 29 Responses May 6, 2014

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    Well, I'm not the other woman,

    yet. But I want to be. I've been in a relationship for 4 years. I thought I was happy until I met my boss's boyfriend. Now I have the hots for him. While she's at work I go to her house and hang out with him, he buys me gifts and takes me out, and we text all the time. I want to...
    PlanetT PlanetT 18-21, F 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 16 Responses Feb 6

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    So this post is for all you dam haters of us

    "OW" or "OM" you continue to bash us for straying...not being faithful...try to communicate more with spouse...there is no reason to cheat....blah blah blah...you tell me this.... I have been a dam good wife to my H for 21 years...put my dreams on hold so I can make his come...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 48 Responses Nov 6, 2014

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 102 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    For those of us who just ended things,

    or are hanging by a thread, the positive side of this freedom... No more watching them text back and forth like tweeners on our dates. No more lonely Sundays, feeling sad that it's an NC day. No more laying in bed every night wondering what they're doing in bed together. No...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 12

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    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 25

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    I haven't been on here

    for longer than a few minutes in a few weeks. I have been doing a lot of thinking. I will post more later in the week. I do see that there are a few more trolls. I hope that everyone has a good night!
    independentandstubborn independentandstubborn 51-55, F 1 hr ago

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    The sound of the rain is

    such an hypnotic sound to me....How i wish i could have him next to me laying in this couch just listening to this wonderful sound as he plays with my hair to sleep... ...I miss him...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 21

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    If I start working downtown,

    I know things will change between MM and I. Good or bad, things will change once he finds out that I will be in the same vicinity as him. I don't know how he would feel or say once I tell him. But I am very nervous, scared, excited. it's a lot of emotions I'm feeling right now...
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    Wow what a pathetic group of females.

    Yous can't find your own man? What's the deal. If I was a wife I would beat the living f*** out of you. You wouldn't ever think of messing with my man or anyone else's ever again.
    GiveMeHead69 GiveMeHead69 22-25, F 19 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    For those who have managed to,

    how did you get over your MM? We met through a word game online over two years ago and started chatting as friends. Although it never progressed beyond an online / over the phone 'affair', it seems impossible to move on. The situation was so painful for me that time and time...
    whitepoppy77 whitepoppy77 31-35, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 80 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 49 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    So I am kind of surprised

    that this milestone is here already....but today marks 2 months since the last time I saw ex-MM. Getting stronger by the day, never looking back!!!
    ArlingtonRose ArlingtonRose 36-40, F 7 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    I deleted most of my stories

    for personal reasons & probably won't post nearly as much. But today I am posting. (Ex)MM: I remember days when I couldn't even eat on my lunch break because of how upset I was over something you did. I would go home instead and sob into my pillow wondering what I did wrong...
    subgirl26 subgirl26 22-25, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Me again. Sheesh. Connected with mutual

    coworker friend today. Vented to her about work stuff. She caught me at a time that I needed to check in. Learned more about her personal life. She's not a threat. And as Strawberry suggested getting to know her would benefit me. So there's that. He was "annoyed" with the W...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 1 Response 49 mins ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 42 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    A married man - and not 'my' ex-MM - tried to

    kiss me yesterday. He's a co-worker, and we became friends at the office, but it didn't take long for him to let me know he was attracted to me. Naively (or perhaps just foolishly), I didn't think that was any cause for distance; people are attracted to other people all the...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 5 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 45 Responses Jan 10

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    b4realz b4realz 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Funny how one song can shake your entire world.

    ...today I heard...Eric Church - Like a wrecking ball....OMG the words are sooo powerful....the words made me cry actually to know that a man can desire his wife soooo much that the entire house will shake when he gets home and make love to her....such beautiful words....my H...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I went on strike this weekend,

    intentionally forbidding myself from doing anything that would lead to any lingering thoughts of MM. I'm so glad I did. Sometimes clearing your mind is as simple and obvious as telling all the voices in your head to shut up. (Don't get me wrong - you may have to do it a few...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I haven't posted here in a long,

    long time. Mostly it's because I had a hell of a D-day in early February. My H discovered the affair, confronted me & threatened to send his proof to MM's wife. I use the opportunity to end my marriage. And so did MM. But, we did not end it to be with each other. We took...
    crazycontrolled crazycontrolled 36-40, F 25 Responses Apr 30

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    OH. MY. GOD. It's final,

    he's single, and as of 9:37am today I am no longer the OW!!!
    Shardsofsorrow Shardsofsorrow 31-35, F 77 Responses Jul 29

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    In honor of an OW member ,

    our very own writer extraordinaire, ( you know who you are) I changed my picture to a butterfly today. One of her stories changed my destiny. Honestly and truly it has. I have a suggestion. Why don't we choose an International Other Woman's Day. LOL that would seriously make a...
    LotusLIL LotusLIL 46-50, F 11 Responses 1 day ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    what I sent him, probably won't mean a thing.

    ..but hey what the hell ..why not. "Well, excuse me for trying to see you, excuse me for even thinking about you. I intern at firm in the area now, so i thought i'd drop a text, since it was convienient. I apologize. Really, I do. Kinda upsetting that you just read my message...
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 2 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    why do I try, why do i?

    this should be old at this point. I was downtown earlier thought I'd drop a text ...so I did. he reads the message ...but no response. there's nothing I can do or say. my feelings are hurt
    newgurlxo newgurlxo 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    She sent him a text about two weeks ago

    that they should separate. He told her he agrees, and wants to move forward with a divorce. They haven't talked much since then.. Mostly about child care. He has slept at my house more than 50% of the nights since then. It feels like we are finally a real couple.. Kinda feels...
    4myhappy 4myhappy 31-35, F 4 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    I'm not the ow right now.

    But I was. When I was 19-20 I had an affair with a 40-41 year old military officer. He was amazing and strong and powerful and I just loved his attention. Well, during the summer when I was away in my own military training, he moved to Germany with his family. We maintained...
    monicawinter monicawinter 36-40, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 19 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    My BF is going through a D

    and he was planning on incorporating a visit with me during a business trip. We were going to have a few days together, including meeting my friends. Yesterday, he told me that he changed his mind, thinking it is too soon for him to be away from the kids for longer than a few...
    HotPinkDaisy HotPinkDaisy 41-45, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I'm frustrated and this is the only place I can

    think of to vent it. I have been with my MM for over 6 years. For the most part, its been a very good relationship. We've had our ups and downs like everyone does. Lately, we've become more open about our feelings for each other. I don't know if I actually love him, but I do...
    lynn414 lynn414 41-45, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Well tomorrow my mm goes on vacation

    for two weeks. Two weeks of no contact. he said he thought about sending pictures while he was gone, I told him not to send anything because I know I'd be checking my mail constantly and I'd be so disappointed if he never sent anything. We have always had no contact on weekends...
    Janna78 Janna78 46-50, F 1 Response 28 mins ago

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    I guess one perk of my current situation is that

    even though he and I might be waiting to have intimate time, and although I seem to be waiting an extraordinary amount for US in general, I at least know he's not going back to his previous situation!!
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 1 day ago

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    I'm starting to become really mad at myself.

    .. It's totally my fault this relationship has become "best friends with benefits" while it started out differently. It's my fault because I let him lead, I let him have all the control, I never open my mouth when I'm upset or mad... However at least he senses this. I'm mad...
    AvaLennon AvaLennon