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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 12,062 People

    Feeling so happy right now.

    Not seen my MM for almost 2 weeks as I've been out of the country but I will do tomorrow. I so can't wait to see him and kiss him.i missed him so much,I know he missed me to as he reached out to me every day first whilst I was away. This relationships can be hard at times but...
    sooty1977 sooty1977 36-40, F 3 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18, 2014

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    Its been a while since i have posted.

    ...its been a crazy time,we went three months without seeing eachother,the longest we managed with no contact was 2 weeks over xmas holidays and it was hell... When we finally did agree to have a coffee at my house it was one of the most emotional things ive ever been through...
    Jellytots2412 Jellytots2412 36-40, F 2 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    So he ended it but what's the first thing I get

    when I come back to work today. I saw chocolates on my desk with a sticky note that says preciosa which is what he called me when we were seeing each other. And then as soon as I sign in to my computer I get an instant message from him saying "Good to see you're back"... He...
    sadpreciosa sadpreciosa 26-30, F 10 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    If someone who knows they have a deep emotional

    and physical connection and obsesses over you, why wouldn't they make an effort to change their lives to make room for the kind of happiness that you could offer each other? I understand hurting others is sometimes involved which is terrible! But wouldn't it be more fair to...
    joyfulcloudofsorrow joyfulcloudofsorrow 31-35, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    I've done a bad thing.

    Not affair related but you girls know me by now. I've screwed over my sister and she has found out. It's a money thing. I'm the worst person in the world and my husband (who I left in December) is taking the blame for me. I disgust myself. I feel the lowest ever right now. If I...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 4 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 19 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 18 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    I feel like it's been ages

    since I've had anything to say. My birthday came and went and he was so sweet! Surprised me in the morning before work with kisses and flowers :) and we had an overnight a few days ago. I'm back at work, which means back to trying to sneak around. Although, it seems to be people...
    lostanddistraught lostanddistraught 26-30, F 17 hrs ago

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    6 years, 3 months after meeting my soul mate

    face to face... The Application for Divorce and the associated documents were posted to his soon to be ex wife's lawyer today :-) ...so as soon as his lawyer receives the signed paperwork back from her, its just a matter of waiting until the 30th of April which is their hearing...
    gigglelicious gigglelicious 36-40, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 11 Responses Feb 13, 2014

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    Well it didn't go as terrible

    as I thought it was going to go today, or be. We started off on our usual morning conversation via text. He said he was excited to talk to me which blew me away because we ended so ugly last night. The phone call went well. When I asked him on the phone why he was excited to...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 5 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 87 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 18 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    So, today he invited himself over again.

    I'm not strong enough to leave him knocking on my door... I forced an argument that began as a discussion... It then spiralled into a full blown row about how unhappy I am, how I can't do this, how I love him more than anything but he can't expect me to do this. The argument...
    DesperatelyDollie DesperatelyDollie 22-25, F 5 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    It's just me :-) Another day gone by

    that he hasn't contacted me. 3 weeks tomorrow. I can get through most days now. Try not to think of him as much. I do wonder how he is though and how his separation is affecting him. But, none of my business eh?
    Livealifeyoulove Livealifeyoulove 36-40, F 4 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 28 Responses May 6, 2014

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 171 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Awful, awful day - full of misunderstandings -

    so hard when you can't actually talk face to face at the time. "We" are ok but today that good 'Ol coaster is on the d-o-w-n for me and I need to square my shoulders and get it going u-p!!! Thank goodness for kindred spirits here x
    onlymeonlyme onlymeonlyme 46-50, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Mammogram this morning.

    Once a year if you like it or not. Thing is it's on my mind that I am the exact age my Mother was when she found her breast cancer. But I'm thinking good thoughts.
    whynot13 whynot13 46-50, F 9 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 14 Responses Mar 21

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    The walk was nice. Then decided it would be

    neat to check IG. Looks like they are/were spending happy family baby time together with another couple. So I sent him a big long text about how I just wanted him to be happy. (If I was really the one, I would be full time, not just some idea). What does "I have to do this...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Dear MM: Plaese text me I am dying to hear from

    you. Tell me all is good. Tell me you want to see me. Tell me we will see each other today and you are available. I am dying to see you. I am begging you, your silence is the worst poison I have ever tasted. You are the most delicious human being I have ever, ever tasted. I miss...
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 2 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 27 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Hi, any books you can recommend about affairs

    and how to help with a brakeup? I need them thanks!
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    FANTASTIC afternoon!!

    ! 😊 ... coffee took and unexpected turn and morphed into a lust filled down and dirty afternoon ... I am exhausted and fully sated Woohoo!!!! Life is good!!!
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 7 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I've made myself physically ill.

    I need a time frame from him. Ladies, how do I ask that? Without pushing... I can't do this...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 54 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    (This is long – but please read through all

    of it , if you have the time) The last two or three weeks I have felt like MM and I are just stuck. Our relationship was growing more than ever up until about three weeks ago, and now we‘re just stuck. It started in the middle of a wonderful time for us, with problems I won...
    ladyquaintrelle ladyquaintrelle 22-25, F 7 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 70 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 88 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    shitbyrd shitbyrd 36-40, F 6 hrs ago

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 14 Responses Feb 6

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    What a lovely surprise.

    .. Talking to MM at the weekend we discovered we both had 2 days this week that we were free to meet up. All booked, can't wait :-)
    daisyblue222 daisyblue222 41-45, F 9 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    The Clarity From Relationship Uncertainty.

    ... I read something from another OW's post that started me off on an introspective journey ... To paraphrase her " If i do not hear how much MM cannot live without me and longs to make me his, the rest of what he says fades in to idle chatter " Ping ! i got her ...I have...
    warriormama warriormama 41-45, F 7 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 41 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 16 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    (See previous OW posts).

    .. I spent most of tonight over at the married couple's house. Tonight was a bit more adventurous...
    DesiredEmily DesiredEmily 22-25, F 2 Responses 29 mins ago

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    The love of my life returned last week from his

    trip. Long and painful trip for me. Part of me was happy he was back but another part of me was super down and actually upset. Maybe cause i knew deep inside me all that it happened and was just pissed off about it. Well, i wasnt wrong... He was super excited telling me all...
    Chicadelcaribe Chicadelcaribe 31-35, F 2 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 48 Responses Jan 10

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    Sometimes I wonder if there is a

    such thing as a happily ever after. I am no longer the other woman, but sometimes I still feel like I am. Sometimes those old haunting questions still sneak into my consciousness. "If he would cheat on her, will he cheat on me?" Am I really lucky enough to be the **% that this...
    PearlRo27 PearlRo27 31-35, F 3 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    After drinking a bit too much with my AP

    and our coworker, I started to think about how inconsistent he's been lately, and my drunk brain just got more and more annoyed with him. I sent him a message on our chat app basically just telling him I was deleting the app, and we'd still be friendly, etc. He said ok, and that...
    DarlingEll DarlingEll 26-30, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Women won't mess with a man

    that lives with his mom but will mess with a man who lives with his wife.
    reeessa reeessa 13-15, F 28 Responses Oct 23, 2014

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