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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,498 People

    Why do all the haters say you're always going

    to be second choice? Maybe we are second choice when he "has" to go home but in reality we aren't second choice in his heart or his mind. I can almost promise that he's thinking about me more than his wife. I can almost promise his heart is starting to lead him else where and...
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 90 Responses Aug 10

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    I haven't had any contact with my AP

    since Tuesday and I probably won't again until this coming Tuesday but I so badly want to text him or call him to tell him that we need to talk but I know that I won't get a reply back or he won't pick up his phone cuz of his GF and if she gets ahold of his phone and sees that I...
    Cagirlie Cagirlie 36-40, F 4 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 68 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 18 Responses Apr 18

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    Another day with my AP out of the office.

    Although I did get some work done, I totally missed him. We have a big event to work tomorrow and then my boss is gone all next week. I am so looking forward to work. AP is out in the field for a half a day Monday, but when he returns, it's on. Do any of you other ladies have an...
    surfandturf surfandturf 36-40, F 1 hr ago

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    OhMyGoodness! I've been away from here

    for a bit tending to other things, but today definitely merits an update! A little background for those who don't know my story, it has been one year and ten months since I saw my exAP and one year and 4 months since I walked away from our relationship. In the aftermath, I ended...
    dropdeadredhead dropdeadredhead 36-40, F 5 hrs ago

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    Question way is your cheating partner

    such a ******* and you'll talk bad about them calling them everthing under the sun. Can you see your just as bad as they are your cheating to way do you think your better then them.
    pleasestoplying pleasestoplying 51-55, M 6 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    All the other guys have one problem.

    They aren't him. And he doesn't want me. He never did. What we had was just by circumstance, something that fell into place. We spent a wonderful night together and from then on he was cold and disconnected and distant. He blamed it on crazy work schedule and some other stuff...
    pearl26ab pearl26ab 26-30, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    He just called me, he said he was mad

    and had nothing to say but thought he should call before he leaves tomorrow at 4am. He said be good and don't wait for my messages because I will struggle but I will try to text you everyday. He's so sweet but hurts me that he's still mad at me and will be away for a whole week...
    Missy1179 Missy1179 31-35, F 4 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Ladies... Just for you.

    ..  <img src='data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAPABAP///wAAACH5BAEKAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAICRAEAOw%3D%3D' width='1' height='1' /><img src='data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAPABAP///wAAACH5BAEKAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAICRAEAOw%3D%3D' width='1' height='1' />
    Grace7277 Grace7277 31-35, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    Today's the day... they find out the sex of the

    baby. Part of me is happy and the other part of me is torn. But I have to put my best foot forward and wait for the phone call this afternoon.
    kc5316 kc5316 22-25, F 3 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    The push pull, or hot

    and cold behaviour. I just want to know if this happens to anyone else. My married man and me (I am married too) have tried hard to keep out feelings in check. We have went down the emotional path and it ended with texting and meeting constantly and our heads were always filled...
    Missmetomorrow Missmetomorrow 22-25, F 4 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I haven't seen him or spoken to him in a while.

    . it was so hard to let him go I still think about his touch and kiss every once in a while buy it hurts me I get embarrassed all over again. . Today I was driving down the street and I saw him. He was running on the opposite side of the street. . I froze felt weak at the knees...
    pretypinkpsy pretypinkpsy 22-25, F 1 Response 19 hrs ago

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    Back in the saddle, as they say.

    ... New guy and I met for the first time after exchanging some great emails. It was wonderful and he's wonderful. He's smart and successful and VERY sexy. He's in a sexless marriage but has never had an affair before. We're very attracted to each other physically...
    CountrySlicker CountrySlicker 51-55, F 1 Response 19 hrs ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 14 Responses Jun 2

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    Should we always go with our intuition?

    Usually mine is spot on but I can't prove anything with a gut feeling. I wasn't with him today, im usually with him everyday but today I wasn't. He very well could have been at the office but it's unlikely considering its shabbos so his day ends early. I have a gut feeling he...
    SweetAsSugar10 SweetAsSugar10 22-25 4 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    Single guy is so different to how I remember

    single guys from when I was dating years ago. It's been about 12 years since I was in the dating scene and things seem to have changed a lot in that time!! The guy I went on a date with last night is very refreshing. After I left last night he sent a message to make sure I got...
    JulyBug JulyBug 36-40, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 142 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Monday it will be two weeks

    since last contact with my MM. I'm doing significantly better than i expected. I even have a party planned for tonight, in which I will be the center of attention. I am looking forward to that- my hair also went from blond to red. All in one big transformation.... I got a...
    Grace7277 Grace7277 31-35, F 3 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    Saw him today. Was a mixed feelings kind of day.

    We were at work and I didn't get to touch him even once. I kept hoping to get him alone for even a few minutes but it wasn't meant to be today I guess. It was great to see him and he looked so amazing. But then he sent me this great email about how great a boss and friend I've...
    GenieH22 GenieH22 36-40, F 21 hrs ago

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 43 Responses Feb 24

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    I was the other women

    for a year but now I am the wife. We will be celebrating our 3 year wedding anniversary soon. We were both married to other people when we met. We were both in bad marriages. We are both so much happier now. If anyone wants to hear my story I am happy to share.
    magic2929 magic2929 46-50, F 17 Responses Apr 29

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    I like coming on here

    and reading stories and reading the comments left by others. Sometimes though I feel like it's not beneficial to myself. For example, I haven't tried to make any kind of contact with J since November. BUT. After talking about him and reading about others and the stupid holidays...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 2

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    So tired ..... need sleep.

    ... have a double date tonight with mm but I don't want to go :(
    ap05 ap05 26-30, F 3 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 44 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 80 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 16 Responses Apr 19

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 80 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    He's going away tomorrow

    for a week with his wife and kids and I can't stop crying - can I have some virtual hugs? I'm so so so upset I can't stop my tears
    Missy1179 Missy1179 31-35, F 15 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 29 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 70 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 22 Responses Jul 30

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 163 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    So our experiment to create space without

    actually going NC is going okay, EXCEPT, now that he can only see me two times a week, he is finding ways to call me a lot more. We had decided phone calls weren't restricted, just seeing each other was. I'm not sure if I'm pleased about that or worried that we are not doing...
    greeneyes2232 greeneyes2232 41-45, F 1 Response 10 hrs ago

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    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    The push pull, or hot

    and cold behaviour. I just want to know if this happens to anyone else. My married man and me (I am married too) have tried hard to keep out feelings in check. We have went down the emotional path and it ended with texting and meeting constantly and our heads were always filled...
    Missmetomorrow Missmetomorrow 22-25, F 8 hrs ago

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 17 Responses May 4

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    Please, do not stop posting.

    ... I may not be the best person to make this request because I have only participated on the forum for just a few months. But I am so glad I had a place to go. I can not begin to tell you how supportive you ladies have been during my time of heart aches, up swings, troubles...
    saiyagyrl saiyagyrl 36-40, F 4 Responses May 26

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    My Secret Gold Coin

    You don’t know it, but I think of you as a beautiful, precious, shiny gold coin that I keep secretly hidden in my pocket. I feel happy knowing that you are in there, but unhappy knowing that you have to stay hidden. I wish I could show you off to friends, but they wouldn’t...
    jenn80 jenn80 51-55 18 Responses May 23, 2013

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    I am feeling feisty today!

    I just received an email from my MM, responding to the one I sent him 2 days ago. In it, I stated how lucky his W was that she gets to physically be near him and sleep with him all the time. The first sentence of his response was "She is very much in love with me indeed." He...
    ArlingtonRose ArlingtonRose 31-35, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Today is my birthday

    and I worked like a dog, figures just my luck, no phone calls, no visits, no IM, no texts, no email from my MM. Maybe he forgot, maybe he just don't care, maybe I'm not that important to him after all. This knife in my chest is killing me slowly.
    4everhislady 4everhislady 36-40, F 16 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I know this sound silly

    or maybe silly..my gfren brought me to see a medium or whatever it is called.. I asked him and wonder why i dont get any single text let alone a phone call. Would he still remember me? He is touching down here next week.. According to the medium.. Lol.. Yes he does remember me...
    prettygoddess prettygoddess 26-30, F 11 hrs ago

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    I made it a few days.

    ..then he was rushed to the hospital with pancrease issues. He called me beside himself in pain and needing me. Immediately I was at his side. So back into a relationship, he did admit he's deeply in love with me. I am happier now with it all, we see each other more, he's doing...
    leigh8133 leigh8133 31-35, F 3 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 20 Responses May 6

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    So my man is married

    but we stay together and have been going on 3 years almost. I finally asked him bluntly if he was planning on being my husband soon and he said "yea". I didn't really like the "yea" answer but I will take it for what it is. Now I'm just ready to see some action (like him getting...
    arbosslady arbosslady 31-35, F 2 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    NatashaRose NatashaRose 18-21, F 4 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 47 Responses Feb 16

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    He dropped everything

    and comforted me when my grandfather died, I was with him when my grandmother died and I was with him today when I found out I have autoimmune disease. He's my shoulder to cry on when I can't keep it together and he's strong for me when I can't be strong for myself. I love this...
    SweetAsSugar10 SweetAsSugar10 22-25 22 hrs ago

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    Help!! I need some retail advise.

    My birthday is this Sunday. My BF told me he's hates shopping so he asked me to go shopping with him and pick out what ever I want for my b-day. Exciting right? Well I'm kinda struggling with this. I know exactly what I want which is a $400-$500 purse and $100 perfume...
    saiyagyrl saiyagyrl 36-40, F 15 Responses 21 hrs ago

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