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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 9,492 People

    I WAS the other woman.

    Not anymore. It feels so good to ignore the texts that say I miss you or I love you because I don't feel the same anymore. They keep coming, and I keep ignoring. I am now in another relationship where I am his one and only. No more doubts. No more questioning. No more sadness...
    lilly1988 lilly1988 26-30 10 Responses Feb 13

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    4purrfectdarkness 4purrfectdarkness 26-30, F 152 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    Once again I'm left wondering what his loving

    wife is doing while he's texting me
    nottheplan nottheplan 36-40, F 13 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    I read a story the other day

    that really got me thinking. A woman was talking about her affair and how her therapist had said something along the lines of, "you don't love him. You don't even know him. You love the person you have created in your mind. You can't love someone you only see for an hour a week...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 7 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I don't know if my situation is unique

    but it kind of feels like it is. My ex and I divorced many years ago after he had an with. He married the woman he had the affair with. Long story short, we have ended up becoming very good friends and eventually it turned romantic. I am totally against getting involved with a...
    Conflicted98 Conflicted98 41-45, F 5 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 68 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    I just got accused of enabling a woman here

    because I support her decision to stay with her married man. And I said it in that thread but I also want to say it here as well... Oh ffs.. I am not enabling her.. I am supporting her in her decision. If you look around, I also support other woman who choose to leave their...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 17 Responses May 4

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    Almost got very excited

    that I heard from my Ex-MM today...then I got my senses back. He sorta said he missed me but he said it in his own special way...the annoying way... Anyways...meanwhile the young SG at least strokes my ego and makes me feel nice...who knows if it's real or not. But he says how...
    nolasanchez30 nolasanchez30 31-35, F 19 hrs ago

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    Last day of vacation.

    It's been wonderful! Heading home tomorrow morning. He says he misses me so much. I said he should stop by once I get home tomorrow evening. He can't. Kid's baseball games and going to visit a friend a few hours away. He would have said he would stop by after if he was going...
    CCBatman120 CCBatman120 26-30, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 15 Responses Jun 2

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    Mm (though he deserves many more M's) just told

    me something that breaks my heart. He said he's afraid to have sex because he is not big enough and he won't last long enough and he won't please me.
    nottheplan nottheplan 36-40, F 3 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Off topic question...

    any of you ladies have a Mirena IUD? I got one placed about 10 days ago and am wondering if it's the cause of some emotional lability I've been having. I feel very down lately but I've been sick with the flu, too.
    greeneyes2232 greeneyes2232 41-45, F 3 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 48 Responses Feb 16

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    I was the other women

    for a year but now I am the wife. We will be celebrating our 3 year wedding anniversary soon. We were both married to other people when we met. We were both in bad marriages. We are both so much happier now. If anyone wants to hear my story I am happy to share.
    magic2929 magic2929 46-50, F 19 Responses Apr 29

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    My mm officially ended it today.

    Says he loves his wife too much to keep going. I deleted our messenger we used and told him I don't want to stay in touch. My heart is completely broken. I really think I'm better off without him, but it hurts so bad right now. I guess I'm no longer the "other woman". I...
    megw16 megw16 31-35, F 43 Responses Feb 24

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    Its raining here. I would love to be snuggled

    up under the covers with my MM. Just laying in his arms rubbing his chest (I call that my sexy spot) I miss everything about him. I just wonder if he really misses me or if its just something that he feels he has to say.
    candybuck candybuck 36-40, F 1 Response 18 hrs ago

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    I am so terrified that I will never feel the

    same emotions and feelings that I felt with him. Before him I had Never felt them before. Had no clue what they were. Had no clue I could feel like that as a human being. Is it really possible for another man to awaken those feelings again? That almost indescribable excitement I...
    pearl26ab pearl26ab 26-30, F 6 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 30 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    I love good morning texts.

    Never fails. It makes my morning to know he thinks of me when he wakes up in the morning.... Hopefully I can see him for lunch today because if not, it will be a long way to Monday. Happy Friday everyone.
    Risktakingflirtation Risktakingflirtation 22-25, F 2 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 44 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 44 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    MM asked to meet up today.

    . Obviously To fck. And I decided to divert the conversation and then I stopped replying to him.. And it feels sooooooo good to just say no. It's not about getting even with him. I miss him so much that it hurts. But I'm not his fck toy. I would never subject myself to that...
    Xf1234 Xf1234 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 18

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    Ooooookay....I pick up my phone this am

    while having my coffee, to catch up on what's been going on with you ladies. What do I find? Haters, trolls and generally just nonsense going on. Who are all these people and why, suddenly, are you here telling us what's best for us, when you know not a thing? Get out, shoo...
    CherokeeEyes CherokeeEyes 41-45, F 22 Responses Jul 30

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    So the past few days,

    I haven't been letting him kiss or touch me because I don't think that while he is emotionally confused about what he wants to do we shouldn't be having sex. I find sex to be an emotional connection as well as physical and I would feel like a freaking sex toy if we did and I...
    lostanddistraught lostanddistraught 22-25, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    Things I don't miss from my affair.

    .. 1. Waiting for my phone to ding 2. Lying to spouse about where I am going 3. Making sure I erase texts 4. Time 5. Mind control that the affair holds not mm 6. Questioning of myself and actions 7. Guilt not for the affair but for my husband and his wife 8. Time 9. The panic...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 15 Responses Apr 27

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    Haven't been on today

    so I haven't seen all the troll post but wanted to give a big hug to the OW's out there that are having problems. Remember if the MM was happy at home he wouldn't go look for it elsewhere. That sounds cold but it is true in 90% of the affairs. Same holds true for women who...
    shouldntbethishard shouldntbethishard 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 11

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    He contacted me yesterday.

    Asked why I've been so distant. Worried that he hasn't gotten to see me this week. I didn't respond but this morning he texted me again asking if he could see me today. He asked to come over so we could talk but I'm afraid seeing him will make it impossible for me to end things...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 160 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    Back to effing NC! I hate this roller coaster

    rides downs! So he says I gave him so much crap about worry he will distance himself that he can't take it anymore so he will. I hate my insecurities but it's caused by his one in one outs, he says his one in one outs are caused by my actions. So how does this cycle stop. He...
    Missy1179 Missy1179 31-35, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 37 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    I saw him out and about this morning

    when I dropped my kids off at school. I thought for sure I'd be getting a visit. I run home take a shower and wait and wait....he's not coming of course no call no text nothing ugh. Why do I do this?
    ynoTme83 ynoTme83 31-35, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    No good morning. I don't know why,

    but I won't text him first. I refuse to play a game. If he's not thinking of me **** it, I'm not bothering to go out of my way. Being with a mm will never be easy. I don't think I'll get a happily ever after. I am sure I'll get another d-day at some point. So why am I in this...
    rainydays2 rainydays2 31-35, F 4 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    Meeting on lunch and I shaved

    but forgot my legs... UGH, what 27 hours OT and thinking of him does to my brain. Hope he doesn't notice.
    nottheplan nottheplan 36-40, F 1 Response 4 hrs ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 143 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    Well no text from him today.

    ..his new job has been taking all his time. Now I'm at the point where I think I'm bugging him when I text first. I haven't seen him in a week and I really wish I could see him. I've got 4 months of this...I don't know if I can do it anymore but he's like a drug and its so darn...
    clamar44 clamar44 26-30, F 4 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    So I met with him yesterday to talk.

    He explained why he never told me about his wife he says it's because he didn't want to risk losing me which is no excuse. Says that he cares about me a lot and have never had our kind of bond with anyone not even his wife. I hate that I like him so much and that I'm attached...
    honeybree20 honeybree20 18-21, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    Here's the thing, he is sitting there with his

    family thinking everything is hunky dory. While I am sitting her letting go, moving on. He does not even know. I was not online for 2 days, yet he didn't even notice. He hasn't noticed that I am not available as much anymore. So what does that say about how he feels about me? I...
    freddiesgirl69 freddiesgirl69 41-45, F 3 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    Sorry, Ladies...

    I know I'll probably catch plenty of flak for this, but I'm gonna say it anyway. I have slept with married (or otherwise "spoken for") men before, and I'm sure I'll do it again.  Why?  Because I want to.  Because he wants to.  Because there's not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 206 Responses Jul 28, 2008

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 41-45, F 5 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    Whoever posted this the other day,

    I want to let you know that you saved a marriage. I printed it out for my MM and gave it to him yesterday. I knew in my heart that it would resonate with him and it has. He says he keeps re reading it and told me that yes - it is exactly what he is feeling. I cried and he held...
    Breeze62 Breeze62 51-55, F 9 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 23 Responses May 6

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    He's been gone over a week.

    ...sigh...has it really been that long? Funny enough not the sex I miss. I miss my best friend. He really was my best friend. I hate that his w found out after he died. I will never ever regret him, you can't regret your best friend. I will think of him every single day, just...
    leigh8133 leigh8133 31-35, F 3 hrs ago

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 31-35, M 17 Responses Apr 19

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    To All The Negative Wives

    **to all the wives who have messaged me** I have been messaged and ridiculed by many wives for being a "home wrecker". I for one never knew he was married and let me just say this. If you would provide the love and affection (including taking care of yourselves) your so "loved...
    Livedandloved Livedandloved 22-25, F 81 Responses Feb 18, 2013

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 20 Responses Sep 10

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 36-40, F 79 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Has any one ever introduced their mm to their

    family? How did it turn out if you did. Just moved back home to save money..my dad is aware I have a bf and asks when he is going to meet him.. Mm and I spoke about it..his willing to meet the family his just concerned they will find out he is not divorced. Any advice?
    carlee55 carlee55 22-25, F 7 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    A Letter From The Other Woman

    You are the one he’s lived with for a very long time. I have known him for three years. You are the one who wakes up to his familiar face each and every day and you give him a peck on the cheek. I gaze into his deep brown eyes and run my hands through his slightly graying dark...
    Kelki Kelki 46-50, F 103 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    Had about 4 hours sleep last night.

    My anxiety is starting to get really high already about next week. I have the tickets booked and am about to sort out the hotel. Im scared something will come up and he can't make it. Scared he'll change his mind last minute. Its only been a month since we were last together but...
    mayarose3 mayarose3 26-30, F 9 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 74 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Why is it so hard??? I need to let go

    and for that reason I want to let go but it's so hard. I have dated men and with him I don't have to wonder how he feels about me. We barely go without contact unless I'm ignoring him. Even after we have sex, he doesn't disappear for days and then reappear when he wants sex...
    Truone16 Truone16 31-35, F 2 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    This only will apply to those

    that are Christians and are having affairs. Some feel that God brought this married person into your life for you to be together. The bible clearly states that God "hates" sin and "hates" divorce. It says that God will not tempt us with evil. Can you really see all of that in...
    islandgrl islandgrl 56-60, F 6 Responses 1 hr ago

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    My Secret Gold Coin

    You don’t know it, but I think of you as a beautiful, precious, shiny gold coin that I keep secretly hidden in my pocket. I feel happy knowing that you are in there, but unhappy knowing that you have to stay hidden. I wish I could show you off to friends, but they wouldn’t...
    jenn80 jenn80 51-55 18 Responses May 23, 2013

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