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I Am The Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,291 People

    What is going on with the universe right now?

    Wednesday was wonderful. Yesterday was awful. And today I woke up to find out mm is in the hospital. It's nothing too serious but he said they are talking about surgery. I'm sure he'll be fine but I do wish I could be there for him. I know she's there so at least he's not...
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 6 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    I heard from him a little bit ago.

    Thankfully he doesn't need to have surgery and he's going home in a few hours. We didn't say much as I know he's not feeling well. I don't expect to hear from him the rest of the weekend, which I understand. I'm just glad he's ok and was able to keep me updated.
    RedSheep2 RedSheep2 26-30, F 3 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I used to come to this forum to read stories

    that made me feel less alone, and to give me some sanity and hope. In the midst of my affair, and the lengthy and painful ending of that journey I was here often.. Sharing my story, getting advice, and reading all of the other stories similar to mine. If gave me a sense of calm...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 14 Responses Feb 6

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    My daughter sent me a snapchat about 4pm today

    - she got a postcard in the mail from my MM - it was funny - they like rival football teams and he sent her a postcard about her team. He sent me one too. I cried uncontrollably for about 40 minutes. He's so sweet and thoughtful and is always doing sweet little things like...
    SunshineGrey78 SunshineGrey78 36-40, F 4 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    Day 6 and I was feeling

    so positive all day/ all week until about 2 hours ago and now things seem like they are crashing in. I'm frustrated, I'm annoyed, I'm feeling spiteful, I'm confused. I went to yoga to decompress hoping it would help me figure out exactly what I am feeling and and it did me...
    thelionsden13 thelionsden13 41-45, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Looking back it is funny how easily I fell into

    the trap of becoming 'the other woman.' The first flash of distress - a wounded soul no less, and I dived into the murky water. He told me that I was his oxygen. I was a mermaid Saint Bernard with the reviving elixir strapped to my neck. Strangely, I found two unmarried men...
    Faerylight Faerylight 41-45, F 17 Responses Jun 21

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    Having a frustrating day.

    We had a great night together and things have been good. We email back and forth most days. It seems like we get close and then all of a sudden he goes quiet. I particularly hate this because I try and keep my walls up and as soon as he senses I've let them down he does it to me...
    joyfulcloudofsorrow joyfulcloudofsorrow 31-35, F 9 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    NO LONGER THE OTHER WOMAN!

    !! I am now the only woman :) it has been officially ended this morning, he was straight on the phone to me who was awesome at playing it cool despite up all night worrying! He was going to come over but we both decided against it as he needs time to recover maybe. He has gone...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 21

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    Don't You Women Get It?

    Don't you women get it yet? Most married men are not going to leave their wife for the other woman. These men want the best of both and as long as you're giving it to them that's how things will be. These men are just missing that spark that passion that their marriage has lost...
    totallytea totallytea 46-50, F 170 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    I ended things for good yesterday.

    I think he was surprised, but it was a very emotional ending. He is a very strong person by nature, but I could tell he was hurting. He asked me if there was someone else. I told him no. I cannot even date with him in my life. I simply said I wanted more. He said I deserve more...
    lavc lavc 46-50, F 22 Responses Mar 22

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    D-Day ... Two hours ago MM called me

    frantically ... He had received a call on his cell with my H's caller ID name. He answered ... but no one spoke ... just background noise I arrived home and checked H's phone ... yep he called MM
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 10 Responses 1 day ago

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    MM is leaving soon for a week on a family

    vacation. Mentions everyone is going but not the W. Either he isn't mentioning it because I don't like to hear or she's really not going. Either way it doesn't matter. I don't want to fall apart during that week. What is it about NC that makes you go absolutely insane. I feel...
    nlg1991 nlg1991 22-25, F 3 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I AM NOT THE OTHER WOMAN.

    There are many labels I could have. But "the other woman" is not one I use. That is NOT how I define myself or this relationship! It annoys me that we seem to be identified solely in that context here. No doubt that's who I would be from where she stands ... I'm sure that's...
    SafetyNotGuaranteed SafetyNotGuaranteed 46-50, F 18 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    Arghhhhhhhh! One tiny step forward yesterday,

    and I fall 5 steps back today. When does a broken heart heal? How do I not care anymore? Why is it hurting me and not him? Age old questions taking my spirit down in a spiral.
    Aisurukoto Aisurukoto 41-45, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    What The Wife Doesn't Know..

    What you don't know is.. I never initiated this contact with your husband. I was never out to get him or you. Him being married is NOT a turn on for me. I have never thought ill of you. I wish I could, but never have been able to. I DO have morals; whether you wish to believe it...
    AyoMK AyoMK 22-25, F 31 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    I Applaud "The Other Woman"

    I've looked through this "experience" and have read comments made by both sides. One against "the other woman"...and one supporting. I'm not out to hurt anyone, just merely wishing to provide my experience. Sometimes, speaking from experience, the "other woman" is actually "the...
    seeinglife2x2 seeinglife2x2 46-50, M 53 Responses Apr 12, 2013

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    To all the trolls and the ones telling the ow

    to go kill yourselves....get out of your moms basement and get your own life...I'm sorry your parents didn't hug you before but is very coward to bully the ow users in an Internet forum... Let me tell you as an MM, I see how important the OW are for us and how they make the mm...
    floaty2001 floaty2001 36-40, M 14 Responses Apr 19, 2014

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    I wanted to write this story from the

    perspective of a Married person(MM or MW) having an affair. This was triggered by a question someone posted yesterday, asking Why MM needs the other woman and why the MM can't leave the Ws so easily. Talking from the perspective of a Married person, sometimes things are very...
    Jazz045 Jazz045 36-40, F 17 Responses Mar 25

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    OH. MY. GOD. It's final,

    he's single, and as of 9:37am today I am no longer the OW!!!
    Shardsofsorrow Shardsofsorrow 31-35, F 91 Responses 2 days ago

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    one minute I was feeling

    so happy. amazing how in minutes life changes. we have split.
    Mama2ljre Mama2ljre 36-40, F 7 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I Was The Other Woman; Read If You Want To Walk Away

    I'm 29 years old and I live and own a house with my boyfriend of 11 years. About 2 years about I became involved romantically with my co-worker, a married man with three young children. I still work with him very closely with this man...but about two months ago I completely...
    marygold1983 marygold1983 26-30, F 161 Responses Apr 9, 2012

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    I told him a few days ago

    that I wanted to make this a long term relationship and I wanted to fight for a way to make it work, he responded today that he did too. I told him I didn't want to remain in the shadows, but that I want him. Slowly things are changing. He talked today about wanting to go on...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 9 Responses 1 day ago

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    Holy annoying MM is aggravating.

    .. We were talking this morning and the convo went down a serious road. So as some of you may recall MMs wife found out he cheated in the winter. Lots of crap went down, he wound up in a psych ward bla bla. During this time we stopped our affair but remained friends. He...
    AvaLennon AvaLennon 31-35, F 2 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    It's been 3 yrs since I met this married man.

    . We have been in a distance relationship. He is an army guy and would promise me every year to come and visit me but he never keep his promise. Tonight I got a call ' He said I can't handle it anymore and it's over. Is this the respect I got as being the other women. Can someone...
    Mawip Mawip 22-25, F 5 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    Up down. Up down. Despite ALL the good,

    we are back in some funk. My heartaches, and I'm annoyed all at the same time. I don't know where the energy is different or even if it is but my instincts tell me he's "off" today. It's whatever I guess. I've prepared for these feelings for many moons now... Why should now...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 1 hr ago

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    I guess I'm the "other woman,

    " but in all fairness, that isn't how our relationship began. He was separated from his wife when we met at work and he pursued me. I declined his advances at first, but eventually caved and we wound up in some kind of weird limbo - a friendship that happened to consist of non...
    ashadams244 ashadams244 26-30, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Can't Believe It... I Actually Left

    If you read my last story, you will know that I was the "other woman" in my last relationship. Yes, last. I finally got it all together and I left him. When it came down to it, I finally just said, "Its me or her. I can't live like this anymore." And he begged...
    fuego fuego 18-21 42 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    Dear EP, I am "the other woman"

    and I have come to this site for wisdom and support from other women in my situation. While on this site I have run into people who have ridiculed and bashed me and other's who are here sharing their experiences. Definitely not offering authenticity, support and respect that...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 50 Responses Feb 16, 2014

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    A Letter To The Other Woman

    His wife, his mistress...a role we both seem to share. If I am happy and in his arms, there are tears in your eyes. If you are happy and in his arms, then there are tears in my eyes. Both caught in a web, both being toyed with. You being told that he is going to leave me, Me...
    b4realz b4realz 26-30, F 151 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    10 Myths about being the other woman & FAQ.

    1."You must be doing things in bed his wife won’t." Not true. I have limitations and desires as well. I’m not a prude by any means but I’m not doing anything in bed that a typical couple doesn’t do. 2."He’s just using you for sex." I doubt it, he doesn’t need me for...
    somebody999 somebody999 26-30, F 18 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    Can The Other Woman Ever Really Become The Wife?

    I've read a lot of judgmental comments on different sites but we should never say what we would or would not do because we honestly never know until we find ourselves in a place called "here". I became the other woman (OW) a little over a year ago. We were both married at the...
    essenceoflaneen essenceoflaneen 31-35 94 Responses Feb 19, 2011

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    Happy Friday! Slowly,

    I'm moving away from the OW category despite yesterday's hiccup... Slowly I am realizing that he's seriously into me... Last night we talked for over an hour as we were going to bed- this is new, night time phone calls have replaced the texts- and his goodnight text to me? "I...
    UnrequitedControl UnrequitedControl 31-35, F 2 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    For those of us who just ended things,

    or are hanging by a thread, the positive side of this freedom... No more watching them text back and forth like tweeners on our dates. No more lonely Sundays, feeling sad that it's an NC day. No more laying in bed every night wondering what they're doing in bed together. No...
    Stalked9 Stalked9 41-45, F 19 Responses Jul 12

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    Society calls us cheaters

    and home wreckers and a few other not so nice names, but we are mothers, daughters, sisters and grandmothers like everyone else. The only difference is that we have a relationship outside of our marriage that helps us feel whole. I don't see myself as being any different from...
    KathyJ304 KathyJ304 26-30, F 45 Responses Jan 10

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    "Hopelessly In Love With A Married Man" - I

    swear I didn't mean for this to happen. Loving you was an accident. It just, well, happened :) Love, Misty Starr
    MistyStarr1969 MistyStarr1969 46-50, F 11 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    Mm do not have a clue of what they make us go

    through. My Exmm was so cruel. I feel sorry for his wife. Wish I never met him. I regret so much pain he made me go through. I just had to make it stop. I feel free but the pain does not go away at all. How could he do this to me? I knew that it was not gonna be perfect. But I...
    liberty2014 liberty2014 36-40, F 3 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    My AP is still going through with the divorce.

    His W found someone else and has been that relationship for a couple of months. We picked it back up and for the past couple of weeks and he's been really considerate towards my feelings up until last night. We planned to go on a date this weekend however he wouldn't answer my...
    Melnmoose Melnmoose 36-40, F 1 hr ago

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    Started to type what I was thinking

    but didn't. Maybe later today I will just say it. It isn't going to be pretty. Just needed to vent. My mood sucks right now.
    independentandstubborn independentandstubborn 51-55, F 7 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    To The Married Men

    *I hope this helps the other women who have felt this way* There are some things we, the other women, need you, the married men, to know and understand. Being the other woman is a difficult position. Given a choice, this is not a position we would choose. We are in the...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 78 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    First off, please don't judge me too harshly.

    I am already emotionally damaged and bitter from this whole experience. My story is I met guy a on a social media site and we clicked right away. We fell in love hard and fast. During this time, he was engaged. Many times he almost broke up with her, but never happened. Him and...
    GarnetRoses GarnetRoses 22-25, F 28 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I am posting this letter from a married man

    again because we do sometimes focus on.."what about me" as the other woman in these relationships. This is his side..written by a man I know who is very much in love with his OW. They are old loves reunited about 6 years ago (he can tell you how long its been..to the minute...
    Kokopuffy Kokopuffy 51-55, F 29 Responses May 6, 2014

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    Never Thought I'D Be One Of 'Those Women'.

    Where to start.... I always thought I was an honest trustworthy wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend but now I have strayed into the territory of cheater. If you'd asked me what I thought about women who sleep with married men I'd have said 'home wreckers' and had a rant. But now I...
    AnotherBondiBlonde AnotherBondiBlonde 41-45, F 77 Responses Feb 21, 2013

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    Ok I want to start with,

    he still has not ever said that he is going to leave her. But he agreed this week that he wanted this to be long term. And this afternoon we laid in bed and talked about how this all started. And he said he didn't know what came over him back then. Or why he sent me the...
    iunderstand1234 iunderstand1234 51-55, F 4 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    Love is a powerful drug

    and we succumbed to its power against all logical reason. Under its influence comes a power and a strength that yes we could get through anything...but could we really? Could we survive discovery and loss of love from our family, friends, co-workers or would we turn that loss on...
    solo007 solo007 51-55, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Me again.....another question.

    ...... What do your families know? Mine all know he exists, we can't hide that, as he is around my daughter and I can't ask her to lie. But now that we are a year into this I'm getting the questions from my family "Is he coming with you to (insert generic family event here...
    SunshineGrey78 SunshineGrey78 36-40, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    What It's Like Being The Other Woman

    So many of you have no idea how many of your stories I’ve read and wanted so desperately to reply. Ultimately, I wouldn’t be able to keep up. There is not ONE story I’ve yet to read which is not already written about in my book. I’ve started replying and then I stop...
    Micalle Micalle 36-40, F 48 Responses Apr 22, 2012

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