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I Am Trying So Hard

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 255 People

    At Least I Gave My Best Shot

    What the heck.I tried to keep the feelings alive but I cannot do everything for the two of us.At some point, I succumb.Though unwilling at first, I inched painfully away from oblivion.Yet, eventually, pain and anger enveloped my total being.I fought hard, wanting to make it last...
    MyZen MyZen 36-40, F 2 Responses Nov 3, 2011

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    Because....

    I know I am not allowed to give up, so even though life keeps throwing me hit, after hit, after hit....I am doing my best to face it....and to keep on trying, because I know that I have no other choice....
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Nov 20, 2010

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    I've been Celibate for almost two years.

    I'm ready to give up because honestly there's not many people wanting to wait until there's at least a commitment. Help!!
    Livelaughlearn76 Livelaughlearn76 36-40, F Apr 5

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    Mind Over Matter

    Mind over matter. My mind tries so hard to fight  I'd get these spurts of energy And make the most of it. Then like a bubble that pops Faerie crashes. Mind over matter. The spirit tries to be unfazed. I'd bounce here and there Giggling at a time Then like a glass pane blown by...
    Sylphy Sylphy 41-45, F 8 Responses Apr 5, 2012

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    To show her i am better now.

    To show her i am different. New. But nothing can change her mind. Im the embodyment of evil
    Mineman214 Mineman214 18-21, M 1 Response Aug 12

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    I Don't Get It

    When it isn't her fault, when its not hers either, or his, or theirs but you're broken. Like if you were walking in the middle of a forest and there's a mirror up against a tree, it may have something strong to lean on and be surrounded by beauty but still broken. There is no way...
    MisfitToys MisfitToys 16-17, F Jan 17, 2013

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    To Keep Positive

    I'm trying so hard to keep positive and keep the love flowing within me but I can't stop crying. I feel utterly alone. The worst part about this is that I am not alone. Just lonely.   My husband didn't even look at me today when he got up, I was on the computer in the...
    aliceslade aliceslade 22-25, F 4 Responses Mar 4, 2010

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    Everyone! Please add me on skype :) see you

    there! it's "ayeeyowh" :))
    deleted deleted 26-30 Apr 5

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    Off To Fight The Urge

    I'm off to fight against the scale.Off to stand before the shower drain.And I don't know if today I'll be victorious.I don't know if today i'll pull through the night.I stand my ground, but it's difficult.I try to work through the urge, but I fall so weak against it.Some days, I...
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 22-25, F 1 Response May 13, 2011

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    I am trying to keep it together.

    I am trying so hard not to burst into tears. I am trying not to scream at the top of my lungs that I hate the man you really are. You are not the man you pretend to be. That man that everyone likes and says is such a great guy. That man is a fraud. He is the man you wish you...
    classynsassy34 classynsassy34 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 25

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    Wow.. Sorry to rant but I have to get this out.

    . What's wrong me! Like i try so hard to slim down, grow mussels, just get fit. For the most part I did I lost over 76pounds.. and nothing In my life has changed.. Nobody wont's to hang out, and it's depressing. You try so hard just to get something vary little, and it don't...
    ison71 ison71 16-17, M 1 Response Feb 7

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    All The Time!

    Every second without knowing from you is torture. I canot help but imagining the worst case scenarios, where you are in pain, and very ill, and I cannot even comfort you with my words, and my long distance kisses. Every second of every day I am trying so hard to survive this...
    sweetmeisje sweetmeisje 26-30, F 16 Responses Jun 29, 2010

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    Trying to stay decent.

    And breathing. Harder than most it seems. But will evil win. Dont know But my pals deserve me helping. And some even want me to. Lol Lmao. Its a nice feeling. Despite the rest of life hurting me. Hope the number of them dont vanish. Unless jerks...
    OddlyScintilating OddlyScintilating 46-50, M Aug 25

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    ALL I Do Is Try

     I spent my whole life working hard, went to an ivy but didn't know who the hell I was or what I wanted so didn't do well. So after graduation I went to China to learn Chinese in hope that I could make up for my bad grades and do something cool and get a cool interesting...
    Alwaysahotmess Alwaysahotmess 26-30, F Oct 1, 2009

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    I got a new job that pays 3 dollars per hour

    more Than my old one! While that may not sound like much to you, that's at least a 33% raise for me! Plus I quit smoking which is like another 1 dollar per hour! After a few of these paychecks, I should be doing alright :-p I've decided to study on my own until I can pay for...
    alcool91 alcool91 22-25, M 3 Responses Jul 16

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    Don't you hate it when you're trying

    so hard and people are just putting you down... Telling you your best isn't good enough people wonder why I'm always pushing myself so hard and the fact is if I don't I face so much judgement from my parents that are hardly there. It's Shocking that I still care so much about...
    MissLorii MissLorii 18-21, F 3 Responses May 27

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    For the past 3 days im upset.

    . Im trying to regain all my spirit back. Due to this depression im unable to joke, laugh with my friends, make fun, paint or sing.. its so stressful n frustrating. even couldn't reduce my stress by shouting..
    blowurmind1s blowurmind1s 22-25, F Mar 20

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    Related Experiences

    Those emotions wash over me, but I fight them. I remind myself of the good things I have.
    ImperfectHuman ImperfectHuman 46-50, M 1 Response 15 hrs ago

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    I try to practice mindfulness. I go for walks, but I'm in tears after fifteen minutes from the pain in my joints. I focus on my breathing, but my chest feels tight; I can't get...
    SimiRayea SimiRayea 22-25, T 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Please help. I'm currently experiencing dark thoughts, dark thoughts about just running away. I love all my Children but they have no respect for anything I have ever done for...
    RockingLikeAFetus RockingLikeAFetus 31-35, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Ever since I was a child I've always thought that I would grow up to save the world from things like sickness, getting old, dying, haterd, envy, war, pollution, corruption, etc...
    MK25 MK25 22-25, M 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    this year has been full of hardship for me,yet its been life changing..I get lonely a lot but I try to think good positive thoughts. I work come home and hang with my dog who is an...
    Duke87 Duke87 26-30, M 5 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    So... Around last year at this time, my boss at the time had started to send me emails & messages, and telling me about personal issues (marriage, kids, family, sex, etc.)... So i...
    poopfantastica poopfantastica 70+ 10 hrs ago

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    so true. but also i say the truth no matter how hard it is for you to take it. when i spot someone spewing bs i catch them and shove it in their face. its my civil duty
    blackscribbles blackscribbles 18-21, F 7 hrs ago

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    hi, upon reading some of the experiences for days here in EP i decided to share a bit of my life.. I met this man on-line, i decided to find someone on-line because there are lots...
    ShadesofWhite67 ShadesofWhite67 26-30, F 3 Responses Oct 29

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    Ok, so i sat here procrastinating a lot of my uni work, wondering how it has been a year, countless dates and still no man to really appreciate me in the same way as i have treated...
    Nhona Nhona 22-25, F Oct 28

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    At the time I've it mixed up, I basically fill the holes, wonderful and fat and then, went back again and scrape off the excess as ideal I could. That is going to help you save me...
    Matthew9360qft1 Matthew9360qft1 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 9

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    It's been about five month since I told my husband about my interest in being with a woman. I thought at the time that was the most difficult thing to do. I was way wrong!! The...
    Wantsfortomorrow Wantsfortomorrow 36-40, F 3 Responses Nov 7

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    I think I been trying to forget so much that it is all catching up with me I am trying so hard to get on with my life I been breaking down a lot I cry all the time it don't matter...
    monica0215 monica0215 51-55, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Excuses, excuses. About three years ago I suddenly put on a huge amount of weight over the space of two months, going from 86kg to 122kg. That's like Luke Skywalker turning into...
    EmperorJulian EmperorJulian 46-50, M 2 Responses Oct 28

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    I'm 22 years old and my Birth Mother is 38 years old. The one thing that I am trying to come to terms with and understand and accept. Is that my Birth Mother is a drug addict and...
    mikaleigh mikaleigh 22-25, F 6 Responses Oct 30

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    I am 24 and just had a baby 3 months ago. Im trying first to lose weight to get to my pre-pregnancy weight then lose weight to be at a healthier weight than I already was. I am...
    sftbllstar16 sftbllstar16 22-25, F 7 Responses Nov 6

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    Harvin Thedeolin Finsen breached my trust thus I'd lodged a police report against him report no. G/20140728/2155. It's a case of non-return of personal belongings that he loaned...
    rainbowsundae rainbowsundae 31-35, M Nov 8

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    My marriage is shattered.. Scattered in pieces all around me. I know I can't change it. I've done all I can do.. I'm trying so hard to accept it. I just want this empty void to...
    snarkybookworm snarkybookworm 22-25, F 7 Responses Nov 8

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    I can't lose weight. I try so hard, but I am on medications that prevent me from losing anything more than a few pounds. I am trying to exercise, but my injuries make it difficult...
    kimmahboo kimmahboo 26-30, F 2 Responses Nov 10

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    I'm trying not to be angry anymore and live without meaning.....lately I have been down in the dumps and find it hard to keep my emotions under control....I feel like I'm losing...
    vickijo187 vickijo187 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 11

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    I try my best to be! It is just lately that it became so hard as I fall in love with him and it kind of made me hurt and just depressed most of the time. Loving someone that you...
    StrongWoman9 StrongWoman9 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 13

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    I feel like my depression cut my whole personality in two . The happy one and the suicidal one.. And it makes me feel like I'm just a crazy person. >.<.. Wtf. This is just...
    SubmissiveSecrets SubmissiveSecrets 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 16

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    Especially in my relationship, and today has made me happier than I've been for a long time. I got the emotional intimacy I've been craving for for so long, and I was able to...
    Ginkofishin Ginkofishin 18-21, F Nov 17

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    I am a nice person, I live by the Golden Rule even when it doesn't serve me. It seems several people in my life do the opposite ALL the time. It's frustrating. My ex came to get...
    antidote4toxicity antidote4toxicity 46-50, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I am really guilty of doing this. It's like I want to fit in, but also stand out. I want to be that certain guys "ideal girl" or that certain girls "ideal friend" it's hard living...
    lc543 lc543 16-17, F 3 Responses Nov 1

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    I'm feel like my emotions are everywhere I had a long wknd! I feel numb I want to cry but it's hard too! I didn't even cry when my grandfather passed this year. I know I'm not...
    missyluvslilies missyluvslilies 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 4

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    WITHOUT you. There is a quality of lightness to it with an accompanying pit of sickness in my stomach. As in death, time keeps passing as you grow further from the present and fall...
    belayboy belayboy 41-45, M 2 Responses Nov 15

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    My sixteen year old friend graduated high school today. Two years early. She starts nursing school in January to become an RN and is in Fire school right now. She is such an...
    mstv1112 mstv1112 13-15, F Nov 19

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    I wrote to someone again and regret it deeply. They posted something about them being introverted and I take this as a stern warning to back off. I am also introverted so it pains...
    Howtobeme Howtobeme 51-55, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I never wanted to be married or have children. Before I had my son I prayed to God crying asking me to send someone for me to love and for them to love me back. I was thinking...
    InfiniteLightBeing InfiniteLightBeing 26-30, F 4 days ago

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    I'm trying to do well in school, but I'm failing classes. I'm trying to make friends, but I'm too shy. I'm always trying to be myself, but no one cares. I'm trying not to upset...
    BigMak32 BigMak32 16-17, M 1 Response Nov 5

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