I Am Trying to Get Over My Husband Having An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 216 People

    This is hard. My husband has betrayed me

    and our marriage may be over in two days. I'm scared and stressed out. I'm lonely and tired. I'm ready for the pain of this entire situation to be over. I'm ready to begin wherever I'm supposed to be. My husband has had a lot of indiscretions and I need to get over all this...
    LRMommyof3 LRMommyof3
    41-45, F
    2 Responses May 25, 2015

    My husband and I have been together

    for 18 years . He had always been very controlling . All in all I thought we where happy , then I found text messages between him a a employee of ours . He finally admitted he had an affair but he has never not lived me he was just stupid and can't explain why he Did it but...
    Countrywoman101 Countrywoman101
    51-55, F
    5 Responses Apr 29, 2015

    Our foundation was completely destroyed.

    There is absolutely no trust. I gave him all of me. I loved the vulnerability. We probably won't make it as some marriages do. I am okay with that. My fear is that I will never be able to let go and love again without guarding my heart.
    truthandbeauty truthandbeauty
    36-40, F
    7 Responses Jul 1, 2014

    I am feeling such mixed feelings.

    Firstly I feel enormous pressure to look beautiful, to make a big effort not to upset him, to make the kids behave and to meet all of his needs. I'm putting this on myself but I feel that if I let my guard down he'll go searching elsewhere again. I am feeling really sorry for...
    Tess6 Tess6
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Jun 22, 2014

    I wonder if there will ever be a day

    where I will look in the mirror and not compare myself to the women my husband has slept with. I wonder if there will ever be a day when the nightmares and flashbacks subside. I wonder if there will ever be a day where I won't cry. He is very repenting, but no matter how...
    Deadlikemestillwalking Deadlikemestillwalking
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Jan 14, 2014

    I'm struggling. We have two young kids,

    1 & 3. I don't believe in divorce. He went away out of town for work November 4th, came home November 22 and asked for a separation. He then stayed in our spare room until he left for "work" again 28th. He came home on the 1st asking to reconcile....he admits to sleeping...
    Andromeday Andromeday
    41-45, F
    5 Responses Dec 6, 2013

    I Choose Him Over Myself

    I don't think I can continue to torture myself with this Man. We live together have for 22 years. I can't stand the agony, and pretending it didn't happen. He isolated me from my daughters, he always tells me they're not worth missing. I have 3 beautiful grandchildren my...
    Bittersweet48 Bittersweet48
    51-55, F
    6 Responses Nov 12, 2013

    My Partner Cheated On Me With A Beautiful Woman - Where Do You Go From There?

    In December 2012 my partner came home from work and said he was leaving me for a woman that he had fallen in love with on sight; she felt the same and she was leaving her partner for him. I was totally devastated and we spent the night talking, crying and the next day he moved...
    RockinRobyne1 RockinRobyne1
    56-60, F
    2 Responses Oct 28, 2013

    Why Dont People Want To Talk About The Affair

    It's been 2 months since I found out that my husband was having a affair for 3 and half months there someday I think about it all day long I want to know why was it because the drugs or I wasn't given him what he needed I want to understand why would he tell me he loves her and...
    cmarcus cmarcus
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Aug 29, 2013

    Can't Forget

    I am trying very hard to get over my husband being with someone else. About a year ago we got in a huge fight and since that moment everything changed. He said he needed space so I left to my moms, but after a couple of weeks of not talking I realized something else had to be...
    maripaz724 maripaz724
    31-35, F
    1 Response Aug 9, 2013

    Will I Ever Forget ???

    2 weeks tomorrow I found out my husband of 22 years was talking to another women . He accidentally answered the phone on front of me , if he didn't I would still never know . He said it was someone to talk to about his recovering drug addiction . Someone he met there . She didn't...
    Clrobinson Clrobinson
    41-45, F
    8 Responses Jul 11, 2013

    Why Do I Feel Like I Need To Dig For More Information

    So 6 months later and I decide to look up my husbands phone records from the month he had the affair.Well,noticed he was also sent some inappropriate picture messages in which he replied to.Really,could it get worse.Geuss I should learn to stop digging and leave well enough alone...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    3 Responses May 29, 2013

    My Husband Is Cheating And I Want To Give It Time

    My husband came home a month ago and told me I make him nothing but unhappy and he cares for this girl he met at work. At first I was angry, then I begged him to reconsider, then I wondered why me. We have two sons together and a third on the way. He also has custody of his...
    rachaelt31 rachaelt31
    36-40, F
    4 Responses May 22, 2013

    Can You Ever Really Trust Them Agian?

    We have been through counseling over and over again, but it only helped temporarily. My husband likes the attention he gets from other women. It's like he has a hole in his soul. There is no filling it, no matter how much love or attention I give him. I'm tired of failing him. I...
    LifeGaveMeLemons LifeGaveMeLemons
    51-55, F
    2 Responses May 20, 2013

    Its Going To Be Another One Of Those Days.

    So we are going on 6 months since my husbands affair and still waking up feeling blah.I just want a hug right know.I woke up sad .Partly because my husband had to go out of town today and I have a really hard time with that seen as how his affair happened while he was out of town...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    4 Responses May 20, 2013

    Date Night

    Yesterday morning I had planned a late Mother's Day Gift to myself. A day of beauty at the spa. My daughter had also chipped in with my mother to include a pedicure to go along with this day at the spa. It all started at 9:00 am with hair highlights and color, manicure, shampoo...
    ozzymom ozzymom
    46-50, F
    1 Response May 20, 2013

    Having Dreams

    So I am not having bad dreams anymore about my husbands affair but am now having dreams of me having an affair.Really,like it could get any worse?Is this normal.I am having a hard time with this and do wonder what it would be like to have sex with another man.Just once,curiousity...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    4 Responses May 10, 2013

    Dont Know What To Say

    Still having a really hard time trying to get over my husband cheating on me.Does it really get any better?Does anyone start to feel better and that its not there fault.I feel like Im a piece of crap who allowed myself to get taken advantage of.I feel like im not pretty enough or...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    5 Responses Apr 29, 2013

    I Just Want Some Attention

    I feel as if no matter how much attention my husband tries to give me for the mistake he made,cheating on me its never gonna be enough.I want attention from someone who didn't disappoint me like that.I want to be able to look at someone with care,and not disappointment,with...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    4 Responses Apr 23, 2013

    Is It Really Worth It

    I dislike waking up every morning thinking am I that bad of a person that my husband felt he needed to cheat.I look at myself and wonder what is wrong with me.Everyone else likes me but I wasn't enough to make him stop.What the heck.Why do I feel like crap.Its not fair.I wonder...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    3 Responses Apr 19, 2013

    Still Here But Am I Really Here

    Hello to everyone.My story is long but I will try to make it short.Husband of 16 years had an affair 5 months ago also hes the only man ive ever been with.He is not in contact with her.Its only happened once.He is very remorseful,prays every day,very patient with my mood swings...
    CalebMadison2 CalebMadison2
    2 Responses Apr 18, 2013

    Should I Just Let Him Go?

    After my husband assured me that his affair with his coworker was over I discovered that it went on for another two months, and that he had just gotten much better at hiding their meetings. I believe it now has really been over for a month. I am pretty sure of this because I...
    needmysanityback needmysanityback
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Apr 9, 2013

    It'S Not The End

    For anyone who has experienced their spouse having an affair, I just want to tell you that there is hope. A marriage can survive an affair. It can actually become "better than new". It takes a lot of work. It takes a lot of grace and forgiveness. It takes a lot of honesty...
    tropicalislandgirl tropicalislandgirl
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Mar 6, 2013

    My Wife Had An Affair Before We Were Married But Just Confessed

    Ok...here goes. The story that I can't let go. We'll start with some background. I know this group is for women trying to get over a husband who had an affair, but I'm thinking a woman's perspective might be helpful to me. I have been married now for just over 3 years to who I...
    cj71 cj71
    41-45, M
    3 Responses Feb 22, 2013

    I Don'T Want To Feel This Way

    My husband of 7 years had an affair with a coworker. I have been reading other stories and I see a lot of coworker affairs. I only work part time since going back to work and I have a really stressful job so I guess I don't sympathize. He started coming home talking about her...
    needmysanityback needmysanityback
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Feb 12, 2013

    I forgave my husband for his affair of one night but im still hurt

    Well my boyfriend and I move in together on 2007 it was pretty good and on 2008 we got married and had problems like any many couples my husband started to talk on the party line and talked to different girls wen I found out it hurt me alot that he can spend time to talked to...
    Jan 18, 2013

    Still Suffering

    Just under three months ago, purely by chance, I discovered love emails that were written by my husband to a woman he works with. There's no point expressing to you all the incredible and beautiful history of our marriage and friendship or the strong relationship we had/have, our...
    GraduallyHealing GraduallyHealing
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Jan 17, 2013

    What To Do After 20 Years My Partner Has Cheated On Me Dont Know What To Do

    i have just recently found out my partner of 20 years had an affair with a woman from half way across the world the used to play cards on Facebook and it started from there he went to Melbourne for his usual football trip normally he goes for 3 days but for some reason he went...
    3 Responses Jan 14, 2013

    To Much

    The pain is to much I hardly can hold my self together I really just want to end it
    3 Responses Jan 9, 2013

    Some Times I Hate Him

    I don't know what to do I feel like I'm stuck in this horrible life of some other then mine ! He had an affair for a 1 and a half deep inside I known I accused him over and over then one night she txt me ! Oh this happened before not for so long ! I don't think I could be healed...
    Jan 9, 2013

    Did He Love Me

    When my husband told me he had been groping a woman at work and lost his job through it, I believed him. He was shaking and barely able to speak the day he told me, it turned out they had been caught on the security camera and his boss saw what was happening. He spent the next 6...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Dec 30, 2012

    Just Get Over It?!?

    At the end of April 2012 I found out my husband of only 3 1/2 years had had a 3 year affair. We got married in September of 2008 and our daughter was born the following month. A month after she was born we moved out of state for his job, leaving all family and the only things I...
    Praying4Peace83 Praying4Peace83
    26-30, F
    1 Response Dec 19, 2012


    The words of the song swirl around me. They touch the places that long to be healed. They touch the places that burn inside of me to be released With their cool flame Without knowing who I was or what I would be going through She wrote this song for me. She declared freedom over...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    1 Response Dec 16, 2012

    A Dark Day

    Brokeness... Stumbling through the day, trying to make it feel "normal" He came in late We tried to pretend, but it was too much for me He slept downstairs Get up early, can't sleep Take out the trash Have devotional downstairs Get the kids ready Suggest we make changes to our...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Dec 11, 2012

    My Husband Cheated And Wants A Second Chance

    A few weeks after my husband and I first heard the heartbeat of our child, I discovered a picture of him with a half-naked girl on his phone. Through a gradual unveiling of truths, he now has admitted to having sex with an employee of his a year ago. "It was only a few times and...
    Rosie201 Rosie201
    31-35, F
    12 Responses Dec 9, 2012

    Why Was I Not Enough?

    My husband and I have been separated for almost a month because he had an affair. The separation did not come because I kicked him out but rather because he left me for her. At first, I died a little inside. I cried all the time and lived like a zombie. If it were not for my...
    catucutie catucutie
    36-40, F
    9 Responses Dec 8, 2012


    How do I stay calm? How do I step back and let him follow his path where it leads? How do I not cry every time he leaves? How do I move on if that's what I truly have to do? How do I know when that time comes? How do I look at him and not see the man I want so badly? How do...
    Jgizmo Jgizmo
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Dec 6, 2012

    How This Woman Wants To Be Loved...

    When I say that nothing is wrong, hold me until I can tell you without exploding. When the kids wake up at night, get up with them to give me a break from having taken care of them all day. When I cook a great meal, wash the dishes. When you hear me crying, come and hold me. When...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Dec 4, 2012

    It Was 5 In The Morning

    My eyes were hibernating He came home I felt it was the safest time to sleep He dozed off My mind starting working like a clock Tick Tock Tick Tock Baby's cries gave my head a knock It's a new day today... It's not the end, it's the beginning of a new experience.. Everyday...
    JustDontMindMe JustDontMindMe
    31-35, F
    Nov 28, 2012

    Get It Right Or Get Left

    Healing. Not by some magical spell. No full-proof formula. But working on myself, being honest, and communicating. Learning to tell you that things must change or improve, Without sounding like a leaky faucet. Learning to give you credit for the things you do right as well...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Nov 28, 2012

    Lost Track

    . . . I'm disconnected .... Find My IPhone .... OFF
    JustDontMindMe JustDontMindMe
    31-35, F
    1 Response Nov 21, 2012

    Night Ii

    Text? None Call? None Maybe a:- Hi or; I'm there; Good Night or; Good Morning; At least a:- How are the kids.... Worst - hows Baby?? If I don't matter anymore....
    JustDontMindMe JustDontMindMe
    31-35, F
    Nov 21, 2012

    Out Of Town

    He Super Car 200miles away Enjoying Me 2wks old baby Marketing Surviving
    JustDontMindMe JustDontMindMe
    31-35, F
    1 Response Nov 20, 2012

    The Exchange

    They say that things will never change, that he can't and won't change. They say that he will always be a cheater. I have decided that I don't want him to change... Instead let's exchange. There are parts of our marriage that need to be different, Not just for this season, but...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    1 Response Nov 19, 2012

    Something Tells Me It's On

    Late Night Not responding to messages Late Night Shower Distance Silence Fatigue It's haunting me.. I need to get well as speedy as I can...
    JustDontMindMe JustDontMindMe
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Nov 18, 2012

    My Husband Almost Left Me For Another Woman

    My husband is a marine who was gone our first whole year of marriage. At the end of the year he was able to come home for 3 weeks & I got pregnant. He went back to work out of state for four months & our relationship & marriage changed so much. We both knew something was missing...
    Sweet180 Sweet180
    Nov 11, 2012


    The road to recovery begins with facing my fears. The two biggest fears that I have are so stupid...because they contradict each other. I fear staying in this relationship because he could be making a huge fool out of me and hurt me again. I also fear leaving and asking for a...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    6 Responses Nov 5, 2012

    I Need My Best Friend!

    It was one of those moments... One of those things that I could only talk to my husband or God about, And God wasn't listening. He wanted sex and I needed to talk. But me needing to talk only provoked, "Oh my Gahhh!!!" I could feel the walls go up around my heart And the...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Oct 30, 2012

    My Husbands Affair And Death

    My husbands mother died and he became depressed but would not talk about his feelings,then in November 2010 he came home from work shaking and barely able to speak and told me he had been suspended for groping a cashier (he managed a garage) and it had been caught on cctv, he...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Oct 29, 2012

    Just For Me...

    Not a day goes by that I don't battle myself. Half of the world tells me that it isn't my fault. The other half says that it is all my fault. Of course, my response to everyone is that I hold him completely responsible. The truth is that I'm always second guessing myself now...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Oct 29, 2012

    Weak Or Far Too Strong?

    He tried to make up and apologize. Eventhou he did not confess of his intention to initiate an infidelity. Repetitously saying he will never do that to me. (who is in the right mind would sign up for such website without any intention?) and I simply can't accept it.. I have no...
    JustDontMindMe JustDontMindMe
    31-35, F
    1 Response Oct 28, 2012

    One Night At A Time...

    He asked if I was going to come upstairs tonight because I hadn't slept in our bed for the past two nights. I said I would, but continued to lay on the air mattress staring at the tv. He reached for my hand to help me up and I reluctantly gave it to him and trudge up the stairs...
    b4realz b4realz
    31-35, F
    1 Response Oct 26, 2012

    Trying To Forget

    Trying to forget my husbands affair
    Tommyone Tommyone
    51-55, F
    1 Response Aug 21, 2012

    3 Stints In Mental Hospitals And Hes The Crazy One.

    8years and two boys makes us common law recognized by our state. i found out my husband has been cheating on me by snooping through his phone confirmed by a text to me from the "O.W" tonight. before tonights confirmation i found he was hiding a facebook and lying about where hes...
    sodecieved sodecieved
    26-30, F
    Jun 26, 2012

    Broken Hearted

    On September the 7th last year I had a very wierd phone call asking if Paul was there (MY HUSBAND) and I said no because he had gone away with work, the call was from a very cross woman. This got me thinking and I called my Husband in Scotland (where he was) and told him - he...
    whatasillybillyiam whatasillybillyiam
    46-50, F
    1 Response Jun 20, 2012

    My Husband Had A 2 Year Affair

    My husband of 17 yrs was having a 2 yr affair ! I feel so dumb for not even realizing something was wrong! I caught him in January and he broke it off with her, they work together which is even worse! He doesnt seem like he is sorry in fact he acts like nothing ever happened! He...
    mizled033 mizled033
    5 Responses May 15, 2012

    He Has A Girlfriend...

    My husband & I have been together for over 25 years, married for over 10. Originally I caught him E-mailing a women from his past. That was supposeditly it until about 7 months ago, when it started again. At first it was just verbal contact, then it moved into a full blown...
    chloe02554 chloe02554
    46-50, F
    May 3, 2012

    Lost And Scared

    My husband and I have been married for 15 years and together for 20 years. According to him in which I agree we had a perfect marriage when he decided to start an affair with a friends daughter who we've know since she was 8 years old. She use to call me auntie and my husband...
    Rholder Rholder
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Apr 12, 2012

    Husband And I Were Getting Over It -- Then She Showed Up!

    We had been married over 38 years when he had an affair with a good friend of ours who is almost young enoughto be our daughter. It has been over for 7 months. We've been in marriage counseling and I've been in personal counseling. Just starting to get our lives back together...
    jillarie jillarie
    61-65, F
    2 Responses Feb 19, 2012

    How Do I Move On

    I found out my husband was cheating a few weeks ago... im not sure where to begin in trying to heal. i feel disrespected, disregarded, unappreciated and most importantly his cheating has made me feel like i'm not enough. My love is not enough to keep him. before meeting him i...
    99probs 99probs
    1 Response Nov 30, 2011
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