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I Am Trying to Save My Marriage

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 248 People

    A website I found useful

    for saving a marriage after infidelity: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5525_qa.html (tried twice to set up the link in here. I posted it in the replies below, or you can copy and paste. Not sure why it won't set up. Sorry, IATTSMM pals) There is a section or two...
    lillynfriends lillynfriends 46-50, F 2 Responses Jun 19

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    I Need Help Saving My Marriage

    I married my husband nearly four years ago after only three months of dating and learning we were pregnant. Yes, the pregnancy was very unexpected, but we loved each other very much and decided marriage was the best so we could build a family together. Everything was fine until...
    tylersmama1224 tylersmama1224 22-25, F 9 Responses Mar 9, 2012

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    Moke

    I am a young Egyptian love not know the woman know you love and possible marriage
    moke2010 moke2010 22-25, M Sep 19, 2012

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    Commitment

    Why don't people cherish commitment any more now a days. Why is everyone so eager to jump ship when problems arise. I think that it is unfortunate that people don't try. They are missing out on the experience of making something stronger. Just like when you go through a traumatic...
    lostandscared lostandscared 36-40, M 1 Response Nov 17, 2007

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    I Am Trying to Save My Marriage

    For years my husband and I have hurt each other. We've tried to put the other down to lower them to the level of our own personal self esteem. We have refused to forgive and have held on to bitterness. Recently we have allowed others into our lives. Just when I thought we were...
    learn2bu learn2bu 31-35, F 3 Responses Oct 21, 2007

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    Time For An Exit Plan

    I have been trying to save my marriage for 7 months now.  I have been to counseling,  my wife has been to counseling,  we even went together.  She says she has no feelings for me anymore.  We have 2 children that love us both dearly, 12 and 9 years old.  My children are my...
    rob31rob31 rob31rob31 41-45, M 9 Responses Jun 11, 2011

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    It's hard but I don't know

    where I am standing anymore . Sometimes is good sometimes I just want this to be over. We have been 2 years married and it went from the best thin ever to I don't know what happen...
    memarried memarried 22-25, F 1 Response May 2

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    With Perfect Clarity..

    If I look down the road, I can see perfectly how this will play out. It's like a dance. I may never have danced this dance before, but I know all the steps...We're already falling apart. I am home, lonely, seeking solace, but coming up empty handed. I never get a break from my...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 11 Responses Apr 1, 2008

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    Above all love each other deeply

    because lover covers even the greatest of sins.
    Smckinnis Smckinnis 26-30, F Dec 16, 2013

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    I explained in my previous stories,

    along with steps and resources, that my husband and I attend a monthly marriage support group for marriages that have run into trouble. This support group has been a lifeline for us. The people, their stories, struggles and pain stay private. We find resources together. And...
    lillynfriends lillynfriends 46-50, F 2 Responses Jul 7

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    Should Have Seen The Early Signs...

    I really don't know how I got here, at this stage in my life, 38, 3 kids and separated. I met this man who I thought was the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me.  He was separated, and I was single.  I had three children from one of those highly over rated long term...
    bella389 bella389 36-40, F 1 Response Sep 25, 2011

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    What Can I Do? My Life Is Destroyed.

    Married 27 years. Three great kids. The youngest is a senior in high school. My wife and I are both in our late 40s. My wife cheated on me last year. I was shocked and devastated.  A wake up call for me, beginning of a downward spiral for her. I suspect menopause...
    iietm iietm 46-50, M 13 Responses Aug 27, 2008

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    My Husband Is So Resolved That He Has Left the Marriage; How Do I Save It?

    I am heartbroken and need advice. My husband has left after 6 years of marriage; we have a beautiful daughter. He is completely resolved, saying that there is no hope, that he will not change his mind and that he will never want to be married to me. He told me a month ago and...
    nicolepanizza nicolepanizza 36-40 5 Responses Feb 1, 2009

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    I just found this in the old archive areas!

    Not my story, though. I am copying and pasting since it may help some of us. It is on the EP under: I Am A Member Of The Common Sense Party Affairs Of The Heart--Who Gets The Blame 4 Bad Behavior? Contributing to Marital Problems vs. Causing an Affair - By Anne Bercht...
    lillynfriends lillynfriends 46-50, F Jun 4

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    Packing & separating this week.

    Making sure I hold it together around her and kids. This is the last big interaction I will have with her. I will not pour, be angry, plead, cry , manipulate, blame or guilt her for leaving me. This week my goal is to leave quietly, lovingly and confidently. We need this space...
    wiseprotector wiseprotector 41-45, M 2 Responses Jun 24

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    Counseling For a Year and Burned Out

    I have been in marriage counseling for over a year now..and its not working.  Seems like its even getting worse. We have been together 11 years...married for 8 ....sexless 9.. unhappy 5..counseling 1..burned out now.  Last year I was facing divorce when he presented...
    CooCoo4Cocoapuffs CooCoo4Cocoapuffs 36-40 3 Responses Jun 26, 2008

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    Should I Let My Wife Go?

     I have been fighting a losing battle with my wife. She left me last spring, 2008 and moved from our family home to my parents home 2 miles away. As soon as she left I started to receive calls and letters from our mortgage company regarding our being in...
    donkman90 donkman90 41-45 6 Responses Aug 10, 2009

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    Husband Came Back From 2mnth Separation,,just Cuz Out Of Guilt From Our Son. Doesnt Know What He Feels For Me. Help!

    My husband separated from me and our 7 yr old 2 months ago,, due to him not knowing what he feels for me. possibly no longer loving me ...well...... ,,, hes back ,,,, heres what happened::::: . This weekend my 7 year old spent the w/ my husband where was staying... when it was...
    kathr1322 kathr1322 36-40, F 6 Responses Sep 27, 2012

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    I Dont Care

    Something has cause me to not care about saving my marriage anymore.  I have done everything possible the past 8 months to save my marriage, but I cant say the same about my significant other.  Lately my brain has shut down.  I suddenly dont care.  I dont know if this is a...
    rob31rob31 rob31rob31 41-45, M 6 Responses Aug 6, 2011

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    Slowly Giving Up.

    As much as  I wanted to save my marriage, I'm slowly giving up. Is this normal?  I see my wife happy with what she is doing. I'm jealous, angry, sad and all other negative thoughts combined. I'm not happy!!! I can't find my way to happiness!! If you read my stories, My wife...
    ptat ptat 46-50, M 2 Responses Jul 21, 2011

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    I Love My Husband and Want to Save My Marriage

    My husband told me on Jan 2 that he wants to end our 6 year marriage. We have a beautiful 7 year old daughter who we love very much.. We have had a hard six years and he has loved me truly and deeply for all of his time but says that due to my behaviour that love is now dead and...
    nicolepanizza nicolepanizza 36-40 2 Responses Jan 29, 2009

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    Thinking Of The Kids Has Slowed My Thought Process Down

    As I slowly gather up all that I can about our finances and begin my plannig of my future, I happened to read an article today by a child psychologist.  The article stated that the worst ages of children to go thru a divorce is 9-14.   Of course my boy is 9 and my girl is 12...
    rob31rob31 rob31rob31 41-45, M 7 Responses Jun 15, 2011

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    I went through my husband phone

    and he is cheating on me now he says he is getting his phone cut off because that's the only way he can stay married to me because he can't trust me I invaded his privacy .
    madblackwomen madblackwomen 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 25

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    I Give Up!

    I finally give up trying to save my marriage. As much as I wanted, I can't fight the pains and emotional abuses y wife is throwing at me. I find out  her she been doing things that she don't wanted to do with me. I finally let out the pains that was buried deep within my heart...
    ptat ptat 46-50, M 5 Responses Aug 1, 2011

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    My Husband Says He's Not Sure If He Ever Loved Me

    I am 43 years old and have been with my husband for 23 years; married for 13.  Of course we've had our ups and downs, but we've always had a good marriage.  Well, that is what I thought.  About five days ago, I knew there was something on my husband's mind.  When I asked what...
    GA715 GA715 41-45, F 7 Responses Oct 29, 2011

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    Do You Really Want To Save Your Marriage?

    I REALLY want you to be successful at getting back the love of your life…I will take you by the hand and... -Get you in the right frame of mind. (panic mode won't work) -Assess where you are in the heart and mind of your ex. -based on where you are give you a step by step...
    andyandyto andyandyto 22-25, F Jul 19, 2012

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    One Day At A Time

    At the end of October of 2011, I came back from a business trip and I was angry at my wife, my life and everything else. I told my wife we needed to separate for a while. It was the hardest thing for me to do but I couldn't stay at home. I was wanting to divorce my wife because...
    Newmanofgod Newmanofgod 26-30 6 Responses Apr 4, 2012

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    Should I Wait For Her And For How Long

    This is a continuation of a previous post... I'm in a 4 year marriage with no kids. Life was good and fun with laughs, but we had family problems and sex was becoming infrequent (1 year since last time). An argument 10 months ago led to big positive changes for me as she was...
    jaeger05 jaeger05 31-35, M Jul 24, 2013

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    Trusting & Lying

    Always catching husband in a lie. He will not tell the truth to save his own soul. I have informed him on several occasions that I pay attention to everything that he does and he pays that no mind. I can tell by the conversations that we have that he has or will do something that...
    Littletrustleft2 Littletrustleft2 46-50, F Aug 4, 2013

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    I'm Here Again...

    e meet very young, early 20s ans very much in love. After 3 years living together He told me that He wasn't sure He loved me. I was devastated... He was my life, heart and soul! He broke my heart in a million pieces. After some timeI got myself together, rediscovered my dreams...
    Milqk Milqk 31-35 4 Responses Aug 29, 2012

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    Marriage On The blink- Maybe Last Chance To Save Marriage

    I have been married for 14 years have a daughter 14, son 11 and step-daughter 18. We were married when I was 24 and she was 21. It came as a big shock to me a couple of weeks ago, My wife told me that she isn’t connected to me emotionally and loves me, but is not in love. Since...
    JamesNadenicek JamesNadenicek 41-45 4 Responses Apr 3, 2013

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    The Good, The Bad, The Ugly And The Hopeful?

    Well its been about two months now since my husband had a brief fling with a younger women. In some way things have improved from the early days after I found out, when I could barely eat sleep or function and my thoughts were consumed with anger and betrayal. But in some ways...
    WoundedLioness WoundedLioness 26-30 1 Response Feb 16, 2012

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    My Marriage

    I have just completed 20 years of marriage, sometimes I don't know how I managed to get to this point. I am trying really hard. Is it working? I dunno. The only thing that works is the sex. I've tried everything to make us work as a family. He isn't working with me. I...
    living4now living4now 41-45, F 6 Responses Dec 25, 2012

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    World Is Now Upside Down -- Must Get A Grip

    We have been married 29 years, we pulled together and made things work and the we had a good time. Now the kids have grown up and moved out. I started a few new hobbies (mountain biking, motorcycles, trying to learn guitar) and suggested she do the same. Instead the...
    Raz00 Raz00 51-55 1 Response Apr 2, 2012

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    Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

    I have been with my husband ffour years and married three, he is my heart, my sole, my everything, he is in the navy and hates his job, he comes home frustrated with his life and takes his anger out on me, not by physical abuse but by mentally breaking me down, i tell my self all...
    1 Response Jan 30, 2013

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    Hope

    I hesitate to share this here, because I have been in the other side of the boat, and I know how it hurts...but as this group is for people who want things to get better... There is hope. When I first joined EP, I was here. I was hurting and afraid and lonely and sad...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 17 Responses Jul 19, 2009

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    The Fallout From A Single Week

    I married my wife in June last year. Prior to our wedding we have lived together for 18 months. We have been in a relationship for three and a half years. This is my second marriage. I am in my late fifties and my wife hear early forties. I have custody of the one child from my...
    SL1803 SL1803 56-60 1 Response Feb 22, 2012

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    I Am Alone Trying To Save My Marriage.

    My wife and I will be married for nine years this November, if we make it that far.  I realize that my story may not seem that different from many other situations, but it is my story.  My wife told me yesterday that she did not want to be with me anymore.  I say...
    seyu2upcqw seyu2upcqw 36-40 9 Responses May 24, 2010

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    Not When It's Over

    So, I'm stuck, at a crossroads of course. I was going to delete this experience, because right now, I am not trying to save my marriage.  I am trying to figure out how we are going to get through this separation.   I really do not know how to love my...
    MizzBlue72 MizzBlue72 36-40, F 6 Responses Dec 12, 2008

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    My heart is heavy today

    so I keep crying . My husband has really hurt me and has not apologized yet but says he can't trust me cause I went in his phone but this makes the second time I had his phone and both times he got caught cheating
    madblackwomen madblackwomen 36-40, F 1 Response Apr 25

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    Tired

    i am trying my best but i am so tired of trying. i dont feel that this should be something so hard. getting along, having passion, truth, safety with the person who is supposed to be your soulmate and life partner should not be so much work. I think my biggest issue is the...
    goldie25 goldie25 31-35, F 5 Responses Jun 4, 2008

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    Accept

    im trying to get my husband to come back home and save our marriage and the family i love him and forgive him i want to put the past behind us no bringing up the past want awhole new start want a clean and strong heart
    sjones46 sjones46 46-50 2 Responses Sep 14, 2012

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    Don't Know What to Do

    I've been trying to save my marriage for a long time now. But we always seem to go back to fighting. I don't know what happened we used to be so happy. But the last few years have been hell. We thought about splitting up so many times but don't want to give up. I don't want...
    HurricaneLeia HurricaneLeia 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 7, 2008

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    Confused

    It started  two weeks ago. My husband was acting strange so I asked him what was going on. He said he wasn't sure he didn't know what he wants in his life. I moved out and we started counsiling. I want it to work but not sure what he wants, it's very hard. I don't know if I...
    huffmanj1990 huffmanj1990 36-40 4 Responses Sep 18, 2011

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    A funny story. The day

    after our D-Day (when I confronted my husband about his affair, and he ended it), my husband and I met with our priest. We told him we wanted to stay together, and we were at a loss for how to start. He gave us materials, resources, programs, counselors, and prayerful, gentle...
    lillynfriends lillynfriends 46-50, F 2 Responses Jun 24

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    I am trying but we fight all the time

    for stupid stuff then we go back to happy after arguing and saying sorry etc. it's now to the point that is just to much. My ex boyfriend out of the nowhere start to call me and text me . He said he is being single for the past 6 months and that all what he does is think of me...
    memarried memarried 22-25, F 1 Response May 17

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    Fifth Step. If you are just catching this,

    in my stories On this forum, I have four other steps on how my husband and I are trying to save our marriage after an affair. They are from the resources I list in the second step and our experiences with counselors, a support group and our priest. Today I will cover health...
    lillynfriends lillynfriends 46-50, F 1 Response Jun 5

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    How Do I Fix It? Part 2

    I love my husband of seven years. We have two beautiful children, we both have great jobs,and we have a nice home. Why am I unhappy? I try to think about what is causing me to feel disconnected and I can't seem to pinpoint anything that doesn't make ...
    forgotten7 forgotten7 26-30, F 6 Responses Dec 9, 2009

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    A Little Revenge Is Not Bad!! Right?

    September 1st I found out my husband cheated on me.... September 5th was my B-day...I declared FREEDOM!! To do what ever I wanted....SO.... I went to do something my husband has never allowed me to do and was against it.. I GOT A TATTOOOOOO!!!!! I felt so free and yes I did...
    dianaspy5 dianaspy5 31-35, F 7 Responses Oct 21, 2008

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    Money & Marriage ...

    We are newly married We are so happy together We enjoy and cherish everyday But then this devil issue comes Which is taking us apart I'm saving my marriage By saving money and controling it By trusting and being trusted Before our marriage breaks down  
    DollyDiva DollyDiva 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 11, 2011

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    I Spent One Really Good In My Children'S Life And Heard GOD

    My wife and I have been at odds for nearly16 years and finally , after I told her mother off over Christmas, decided to divorce. We have been separated since January and this has given me some time to let my head clear and gain some insight. We have never had a great sexual...
    cvann5 cvann5 51-55, M Feb 3, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Seeking Therapy I’ve made my first step. I am seeing a therapist. This is not to try and repair my sexless marriage. I have realized that my sex life, the passion, the lust...
    Adam4Eve Adam4Eve 46-50, M 6 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    My wife never tells me she loves me and never has a kind word for me. She doesnt like the way I breathe, sweep the floor, clean the toilets or the counter, gets angry with me when...
    48Jeff 48Jeff 46-50, M 7 hrs ago