I think ive nailed it.
Came across a gem that i want to be there with. Has very little and lives in half a tin shed, supported by pregnant to her husband, youngest daughter working like a slave in a plastics factory.
Maricar already likes me, she has a cel fone.
These things gnaw at me until I feel I am going to burst.
I live a life people tell me is supposed to be good but I feel like I am living in hell, like I want to scream, but no one sees.
The only thing I ever wanted, really, was to find someone to love who could love me back...
since I started dating (I'm 21) and each one has lasted no more than 3 months. It's consistent. For whatever reason, the excuse is always, "the spark is never felt." I always put my whole heart into a relationship, but it seems like every single time I try, the guy gives up...
There is something just broken in me that makes me unloveable. Guys love meeting me for sex but that is all I'm good for I guess. I dated one man for 8 months and he pulled the disappearing act with no explanation. Now this one after 20 months gave me the silent treatment for...
I wish i could peel off my skin
and step into another
so i might be good enough
if only that were possible
i might live
instead of just exist
maybe i wouldn't be alone
searching for ways to escape myself
or destroy myself
By the experiences i've had through life with family and public in general, i can see i am unlovable, and its all about simply carrying too much weight. Putting it on so easily which transforms me from an OK looker to something ghastly and repulsive to the human eye.
for someone that will never love me back, an if someone I know will love me know matter what I push them away without realizing what Im doing.
Maybe I think I am unwarthy of love.
I am broken very broken.
the hard reality that there just isn't anyone with whom I'll ever get close again. It's frustrating and baffling, but it isn't in the cards. What's tough is I'm an average guy and all my buddies seem to find women interested in them, yet I'm always the one on the outside looking...
I don't feel I am loved anywhere not even by family. And I know that I have no room to judge: but the most repulsive people can get a girlfriend(by repulsive I don't mean just looks) and now other then the girl I had a crush on a while back I'm the only one who hasn't been in a...