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I Am Working On Being Truely Alive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 117 People

    Alive

    These past 2 years I have felt so dead inside.  I do not know if it is the fear of getting older, what I gave with my family and have nothing in return or just the feeling of being let down, and used. But I have set some goals for myself this week and I am...
    tatteredwings tatteredwings 36-40 7 Responses Mar 29, 2009

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    Alive...

    I have been living a dream for the past two years. Doing what ever i could to block out the world. In other peoples eyes i was living, doing things they didn't dare. But truely living is feeling things, anything! I want to wake up and start living properly... I wan't to...
    Tool88 Tool88 18-21, F May 12, 2010

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    I'm just always trying to find the meaning in

    things.I have bouts of suicidal depression at time but it's always overcome by just the vivacious mess of being alive the feeling of hope movies and books and tv shows and just people really give me. I have this intense phobia of wasting my life away or looking back and feeling...
    rawanabanana rawanabanana 16-17, F Feb 11, 2014

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    Life Is .......

    Life is happening, love it.Life is love, feel it.Life is spirit, nurture it.Life is laughter, enjoy it.Life is happiness, strive for it.Life is opportunity, benefit from it.Life is beauty, admire it.Life is bliss, taste it.Life is a dream, realize it.Life is a challenge, meet it...
    Annikka Annikka 51-55, F 2 Responses Jun 21, 2012

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    I Am Working On...

    Finding a reason to smile.
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 70+, F 1 Response Jan 5, 2011

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    First Step

    Yesterday was just an ordinary day. I did not dread it. It was around 7pm and I got on the bus and went shopping. The sky was filled with dark clouds and pieces of sunset. The air was moist and "beachy". I was calm and content buying groceries. I happen to look in the jewelry...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe 22-25 Sep 14, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    This is one of my biggest fantasies, actually. I love imagining myself being eaten alive by a big beautiful woman--sometimes someone I know, sometimes a celebrity, sometimes just...
    tastymeatboy tastymeatboy 18-21, M Apr 14

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    I'm soo tired that I feel I can't take the pain and inner torment eating me alive. Poisoning my body with sadness and hopelessness .
    Shawanda88 Shawanda88 31-35, F 1 hr ago

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    I'm 33 a trucker and I must say my life sucks I work 80 plus hours a week don't get to talk to many people and am away from my kids 3 weeks at a time. 33 and being in love seems...
    longhaul82 longhaul82 31-35, M Apr 20

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    It's hating my family for abandoning me, despising my friends for always leaving me, having to endure real loneliness, just being completely on my own through life and I'm so sick...
    iamFrightened iamFrightened 18-21, M Apr 22

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    -- Glimpse -- a very brief, passing look, sight, or view. a momentary or slight appearance. a vague idea; inkling. I get this during the day. Maybe just after having woken up in...
    mirkwood86 mirkwood86 26-30, M Apr 13

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    for longer then I can remember I am and have been tired of being alive I have always thought of killing myself but I can't jump off the cliff I sit at the edge feet hanging off the...
    Tempzero Tempzero 22-25, M 1 Response Apr 21

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    New to this. Not sure what to say. So, here goes nothing. I am incredibly bored. I have a great life and probably shouldn't complain. I just don't know what to do anymore. I...
    Jpalm Jpalm 36-40, M 3 Responses Apr 18

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    I want to have fun, dance crazy and laugh and enjoy being alive
    missynona missynona 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 26

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    I don't care about being rich, I care about being able to eat and pay my bills. Fast food is not above me, or anyone else in the world. Because I do not care about money, does not...
    dontyouunderstand dontyouunderstand 18-21 8 hrs ago

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    I thought I'd make another post about being a member at a methadone clinic... Well, I have been a patient since October of 2012, so quite a while now. Anyway, this is really my...
    milehighHeartbreak milehighHeartbreak 31-35, M 2 Responses Apr 16

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    I am so tired of being victimised for just leaving my house. I'd rather hide every day and I try to but life involves food to live so means leaving the house. It's not a common...
    1lonelydaisy 1lonelydaisy 41-45 Apr 22

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    Well, this is messing with my head and heart real bad. You know, the typical fatherless issues. My dad left when i was around 2. I only have one vivid memory of him. Apparently...
    IsolatedMonster IsolatedMonster 18-21, F 4 Responses Apr 10

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    It started like a routine boy-girl thing. He sought me out, started to chat online. I found him interesting so started chatting with him too. We exchanged numbers, started to talk...
    evagould evagould 31-35 4 Responses Apr 13

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    I want to meet new friends and have fun and feel alive again. I've been in a loveless passionless marriage for too long now. Lead separate lives and I've been stagnant for too long...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 26

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    I have been rejected by women all my life and have no friends. I hate my life. I hate it so much. I have to get used to being alone forever and try to be happy with the fact that I...
    atr7887 atr7887 26-30, M 1 Response Apr 10

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    the only reason that i am still living despite being so miserable almost everyday with little positive thoughts is because i am a coward. i am afraid of death so killing myself or...
    perxatkins perxatkins 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    All I can say is that it really sucks. I am working on my A.S. in Networking, and I am working full time as a supervisor at a local airport. As a full-time student, and working...
    proximacentauri proximacentauri 22-25, M Apr 10

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    I've been a stepmom now for about 2 years to a now 4 year old. When I first met my now husband, things were great between me and the child. However as he and I got more involved...
    tcap422 tcap422 26-30, F 6 Responses Apr 19

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    So I typed in "feeling lost in my 20's" on google and this app popped up. Basically, I do love being sociable and having a good Chin wag but working in London with weird hours...
    NurseR1265 NurseR1265 22-25, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    It feels so good to live in a world full of color. I used to be really depressed but I feel alive finally. I thank god everyday I'm out of my hole. Life is beautiful. Nature is...
    piperweant piperweant 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 8

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    SKRILLEX! Who ever participated a Skrillex live concert? I watched him three times live . There were the best three days of my life. I felt so alive. I thought: it worth it living...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 19

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    I'm financially frustrated! I know one thing's for sure once I'm out of the woods I'm not turning back EVER! It's a long and complicated story on how we ended up struggling...
    GeekyGangstaGirl GeekyGangstaGirl 22-25, F Apr 24

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    Lucky. Grateful? Sometimes. Lonely, all the time. I have only my dog and what broken pieces of my family remain. Friends I see and chill with? Chilling as it is, I have only one...
    MissAutumn MissAutumn 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 29

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    I'm keeping to myself more than normal. All my best friends were worried they all told me how much they cared and that they were all so happy that that man saved me.A girl on ep...
    MusicLover4Eternity MusicLover4Eternity 13-15, F 6 days ago

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    I am having hard time starting conversations or meeting people, it is even worse when I am expecting someone to talk to me . Maybe it is just my lack of experience in that field...
    LFSomething LFSomething 22-25, M 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    Why do some women get offended when I hold a door for them? I held the door for a woman and her child at the gas station earlier and she looked at me and said " I got it, i don't...
    ncfootguy ncfootguy 36-40, M 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I have always enjoyed children and being a mom. My mother had two boys when I was in my early and middle teens. I knew being a mom was very hard work but I wanted to be a mom too...
    oldermaturewife oldermaturewife 46-50, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I want to die what's the point of being in this world? It just makes me feel so god dam ****** it's either people hurting me or me hurting them I've pushed everyone away because I...
    butterflybaby123 butterflybaby123 13-15 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Well, lets first give you a bit of background, in October 2010, I planned my suicide for the first time. Living was exhausting, survival seemed unimportant, I felt like no one...
    Girlwhoneverdies Girlwhoneverdies 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 10

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    I must say that I was a sports girl. So, I ran in the evening before bedtime. The fact that I did it in the woods, it's natural. There are few people and it is always possible to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Apr 16

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    My best friend refuses to be around her, my boyfriend feels awkward and my family is being driven apart from me because of my mother and how she treats them/me. She has been...
    AlanaKL101 AlanaKL101 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 20

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    I feel alot right now. ill list the argurment of today and how things are. it started off because we are trying to buy a house. we got married in December 2014 and have been...
    cnj1213 cnj1213 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 28

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    I don't know what I want to do with my life. I'm working a dead end job. My parents are homeless & my only friend lives across the country. My boyfriend and I are at rock bottom...
    easedmysoul easedmysoul 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 11

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    A little over four months ago I weighed 150 pounds. I'm a shy person as it is but I didn't want my body to be just another thing added to my list of insecurities. So far I've...
    samipee samipee 18-21, F 23 Responses Apr 15

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    Went for a career path interview at the large corporate I was working for at the time, after five minutes of inane questions, these fools who I had never met in my life decided I...
    csouls csouls 31-35, M Apr 15

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