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I Amuse Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 371 People

    I Don't Know If I Amuse Myself More...

    I don't know if I amuse myself more than other people do but i do know that I find more things amusing than most people do... I see something and it cracks me up and other people around me don't see the humor in it... it could something small like a pen laying oddly that looks...
    phidget phidget 31-35, F 1 Response May 12, 2008

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    Got Chya Talking...

    One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him: "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F 1 Response Feb 27, 2011

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    It's One of the Reasons I'm Here

    sometimes I can be rather entertaining. I'm witty, mildly talented as a triple threat (sing, dance, act). I have fun with myself - it's a good thing.
    RavenLee RavenLee 46-50, F 2 Responses Sep 2, 2009

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    Well...would Ya?

    A man and his wife are driving home from a friends funeral, contemplating their own mortality. After a few minutes the woman asks her husband, "if I died would you remarry?" Knowing that no matter what, his answer will be wrong, he tells her that, "because we have three small...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 7, 2011

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    Whe You Live...

    in the country in fair seclusion...you have to learn to amuse yourself..
    txwoman2 txwoman2 36-40, F Feb 13, 2010

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    I Just Look In the Mirror and Laugh

     That's all it takes for me to start the day on a happy note.  It helps that I'm funny, but looks aren't everything now are they?
    dorobo dorobo 70+, M 2 Responses Dec 17, 2008

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    I'm a funny ****** or at least I think so.

    I'm always cracking myself up. Have you ever told someone there going to take it in the *** with a zucchini? Well I have and I find it amusing. Earlier today at the store this lady said some guy told her woman all have big boob and an attitude. She said she got screwed. I told...
    holehearted79 holehearted79 31-35, F 1 Response Dec 10, 2013

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    Amuse Me

    I'm more of a serious girl.  At times, I also can be funny.  I will say something and I will laugh at my own joke so to speak. haha.
    Whateverrrrr Whateverrrrr 36-40, F 1 Response Aug 10, 2011

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    Amusing to Me

    People say that I have a strange personality because of the fact that I can easily amuse myself.  I don't really see a problem in that at all.  Here's how I see it, if you can't amuse yourself how in the world can you amuse anyone else?  I'm the type of person who...
    dragon143 dragon143 18-21, F Jan 8, 2009

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    Oh Boy...

    A man receives a phone call from his doctor. The doctor says: "I have some good news and some bad news." The man says: "OK, give me the good news first." The doctor says: "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live." The man replies: "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Feb 24, 2011

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    Thinking It Works A Little Too Well....

    An elderly woman goes to the doctor and asks his help to revive her husband's sex drive. "What about trying Viagra?" asks the doctor. "Not a chance," says Mrs.. Murphy. "He won't even take an aspirin for a headache." "No problem," replies the doctor. "Drop it into his coffee, he...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Feb 25, 2011

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    O Hai

    I'm glad I'm not the only one. I personally think I am extremely funny, though I haven't met many people who agree. heh The people I do make laugh though make it all worth it...but even more than that, I make myself laugh EVERY day and I am not diagnosed as insane so I'm...
    soulshadow soulshadow 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 10, 2010

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    Ohhh... Our Daughters...

    Three blonds talking: "I found cigarettes in my daughters purse. I think she has become a smoker." "I found cocaine in my daughters purse. I think she has become a junkie." "I found condoms in my daughters purse... Oh my God! I think she has become a man!!!"
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Feb 26, 2011

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    What Do I Look Like???

    A woman was nagging her husband that he needs to cut the grass, the husband answer was: "What do I look like to you? A landscaper?" Next time the sink was dripping, she asked him again: "Honey, can you fix the faucet? The husband replied: "What do I look like to you? A Plumber...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F 3 Responses Mar 13, 2011

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    School Vacation Week...

    Okay...so they call it vacation week...let's be realistic here...just because there is no school...doesn't mean there's a vacation time for parents. I have found that everything in my current world is taking 45 minutes to an hour longer than it should. If I have to be at work by...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Feb 23, 2011

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    Sure Do!

    i am the most ridiculous person i know. so incredibly proud of the fact that i'm finally able to laugh at myself. i find humor in just about everything i do.it helps that i'm slight clumsy and say crazy things allll the time. it's my weapon. (even when no one else is laughing...
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F Jan 5, 2009

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    All the Time....

    All the time over the stupidest things. I will just burst out laughing and if someone is in the room that I didn't remember being there they just look at me like I'm mad... entertaining me even more!
    GoddessNakiBean GoddessNakiBean 36-40, F 3 Responses Dec 27, 2008

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    Untilted

    i laugh sometimes when know one else is...ill think of something inside of my head and it will be really funny...ill laugh for ever about it. but i cant tell anyone else about it because they dont find it to funny! not like i do!
    noodlehead noodlehead 16-17, F Dec 11, 2008

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    Viewer Discretion Is Advised...

    There was this newly wed couple that was just married and the bride was home naked waiting for her husband to get home. Well, the mother-in-law decided to stop by and seen the young bride naked and asked what she was doing. And she said: "This is my love dress." The young girl...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F 1 Response Feb 26, 2011

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    This Is Just Really Cute!!!

    Never know what an old guy will say. I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes [he's 66]. We decided to get a bite to eat at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in different colors-green, red...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Feb 25, 2011

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    The Minute Clinic

    One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him: "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F 1 Response Feb 27, 2011

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    Realtors And Speeding Tickets...

    A Realtor, driving his buyers around looking at houses, is suddenly pulled over by a policeman. The policeman approaches the Realtor’s car door, and the Realtor says "Is there a problem officer?" The policeman says, "Sir you were speeding. Can I see your driver’s license...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Feb 24, 2011

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    Oh Ya...that...

    A blonde just totaled her car in a horrific accident. The cop asks her: "What happened?" "Officer, it was the strangest thing!" replies the blonde. "I was driving down the road when all of a sudden this tree pops out of nowhere. So I swerved to the left and out pops another tree...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F Mar 3, 2011

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    Funny to Me Thats All That Matters

    I amuse my self alot. Random thoughts can make me laugh but come on thats most people so i dont like when people stare at me for laughing. I think that if you dont amuse yourself then life would be boring and ur just weird.
    InnerVoices InnerVoices 16-17, M 3 Responses Mar 2, 2009

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    Sometimes Just By Not Being Amused.

    All this silliness around here and the things that I could waste a breath with amusement.  Instead, I look in the mirror and think an intangible sneer, and then I feel better.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 14, 2009

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    Amusing Myself ...

    I have to admit i probably amuse myself more than anyone else can amuse me lol. Sometimes i write stupid comments to peoples abusive words with a kiss and such kindness that they don't know what to say or do about it ... maybe it frustrates them a tad more but i am here giggling...
    deadinsideout deadinsideout 26-30, F Jul 30, 2013

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    If I was an orangatan,

    I would put on a face like this all the time. :D
    deleted deleted 26-30 Aug 19

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    My A$$

    A 50-year-old lady is standing in front of a mirror, looking at herself. Her husband walks in and says: "What are you doing?" She says: "My doctor told me I had the breast of a 20-year-old. He said: "Well, what did he say about your 50-year-old butt?" "Well, he didn't ask about...
    marlon70 marlon70 36-40, F 4 Responses Feb 25, 2011

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    I Know ...

    I know it sounds conceited but I've never met anyone who can make me laugh harder than I make myself laugh. Sometimes I'm the only one who gets my jokes but I find them hilarious!!!
    missing missing 21-25, F 2 Responses May 11, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I like to watch lizards run around on the walls and windows.. Especially geckos hahah.. They amuse me so much
    catho catho 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 28

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    I get amused but the smallest and most ridiculous of things. Sometimes I can just have a balloon and bounce it around for hours. Or if I see squirrels running around a tree I stop...
    Raptax231 Raptax231 18-21, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    I am easily amused - right now I am glad that my day is over and I can relax and read some and write some stories. I am lucky to have nice place to live and a lap top computer to...
    tryingagainII tryingagainII 56-60, M 2 days ago

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    And it has started to eat away at my soul. I can't stand not being able to achieve my own expectations so I try to delude my self and others while I rot inside with guilt. I don't...
    In100years In100years 18-21 12 hrs ago

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    This Just In Well, it’s that time of year again, that time of year when the entire Northeast population becomes unwittingly obsessed with...the weather forecast. Unwittingly is...
    Quintesse Quintesse 51-55, F 9 Responses Nov 7

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    I think I'm a worthwhile person,so why can't I exercise more? I need to keep in mind everyone exercises and does more than I do.I need to extend myself and push for more.It should...
    mirth mirth 46-50, F 14 hrs ago

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    It's funny how my life is turning out. The higher you fly, the harder you fall. I thought the ground was the low. I didn't know I could manage to bury myself deep.
    metaphornographic metaphornographic 18-21, F 6 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    The best part of practical life is I got to do most of important things in my life by myself.
    AbhishekSingh33 AbhishekSingh33 31-35, M 6 hrs ago

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    I've been twisting & bending myself into absolute knots over a personal profile. I've since found after a great deal of support by friends & family. There is no one way to...
    PersistentlyMindedMan PersistentlyMindedMan 18-21, M 19 mins ago

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    I am learning to trust myself, to see myself as a friend, not an enemy. I will wake up in the morning, look at the mirror and say to myself that I trust myself unconditionally. I...
    Close2You Close2You 26-30, M Nov 9

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    lets put it this way. i hate myself for lettin people fool the hell outta me i hate myself for trusting i hate myself for liking someone i shouldn't i hate myself writing this i...
    johnL3 johnL3 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 3

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    (Just before I begin, I don't mean I love myself physically, I just mean I mentally love myself so much that it hurts. I just wanted to clear that up.) Anyway, the thing is, I...
    KittyyKat420 KittyyKat420 18-21, F Nov 5

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    I just hate myself. I really do. I did work really hard to improve myself. What I hate about myself lately is that I seemed to have lost my motivation for life. I just don't care...
    ChrisBoshi ChrisBoshi 22-25 1 Response Nov 12

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    I just hate myself. I really do. I did work really hard to improve myself. What I hate about myself lately is that I seemed to have lost my motivation for life. I just don't care...
    ChrisBoshi ChrisBoshi 22-25 Nov 12

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    I honestly don't know what I'd do if I met myself.. In all honesty I really hate myself sometimes, but I also wouldn't ever want to be someone else. See, that's the confusing part...
    brimc7 brimc7 16-17, F Nov 13

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    I find myself really hating the things that I do, the feelings that I have, or the inadequacies that I feel. I envy sometimes people who are bold and fearless in trying new things...
    liveurbestlifenow liveurbestlifenow 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 14

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    I have hated myself for as long as I can rememeber it may appeared that I was in love with myself. But that was all part of my act. I loathe myself for a lot of different reasons...
    xdarkangelx666 xdarkangelx666 22-25, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    Things have been going pretty unsmooth as of late. My dog died, my mother relapsed into her alcoholism, my father and sister are going away for the holidays (for the first time...
    jennazan jennazan 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    I keep things to myself as a way to protect myself. I have always had a problem sticking to what I promise those around me, and myself; my dreams remained as such, and the changes...
    SavAleMar SavAleMar 22-25, M 2 Responses Oct 28

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    The urge never goes away. As a matter of fact, I kind of want to cut right now. Since I quit I never have, but when I feel bad and have no outlet for my feelings, cutting again...
    SpilledSecrets SpilledSecrets 22-25, F Oct 29