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I Battle Bulimia and Depression

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 114 People

    Slowly Drowning

     I have struggled with eating disorders since I was 15. I routinely starved myself in highschool, and went on long runs in the middle of the night. I started binging and purging my freshman year of college. I had begun dating a guy who wanted me to lose weight, so I began...
    lunhseapyralis lunhseapyralis 22-25 2 Responses Jul 26, 2009

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    It's The Only Thing I Can Control In My Life

    My life from the outside was literally, picture perfect for a 17 yr old girl. All girls private school, popular group, hot boyfriend, good grades, happy out going personality - everything I ever wanted. About a year ago it crashed. I lost my friends, boyfriend, I dropped out of...
    anniebean anniebean 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 20, 2009

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    What's Wrong With Me?

    I have been battling bulimia, anorexia and depression for over 10 years. I moved to a new city 300 miles away from my family and friends 2 years ago. It's so hard. Sometimes, I feel alright. Other times I just want to crawl in a hole and never come out. Today, I just started...
    cassie416 cassie416 31-35 2 Responses Apr 22, 2011

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    My first time.... I was 10

    and is was summer time. I had just ate some pizza and I was so full....the thought of making mysef sick to relieve the fullness couldn't get out of my head. So I did it, and it was easy. And I haven't stopped yet...sure I can go long periods of time without doing it but it...
    Sheone Sheone 18-21, F 12 Responses Jan 18

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    I'm Ready To Give Up Now.

    I have tried, I'm not lying, I've really tried. I have told my family, I have been seeing someone, I have cut my ex out of my life (he really doesn't help me feel any less worthless), I have tried doing things I enjoy, I have tried getting out of the house instead of lying in bed...
    slh544 slh544 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 1, 2012

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    Bulimia, Depression, Sadness

    i need help. im so lost everyday. i stare at my body everyday and i hate it! i have a daughter so i cant give up or anything. but i feel like makingmyself throw up helps me through the day. i always feel better. it feels better to throw up than it will ever feel to eat and if i...
    Blairlost Blairlost 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 24, 2013

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    Hanging In There

    I forgot entirely about all the stories I submitted on here, the latest one being in September, until someone posted a comment a few days ago. And I read through all my posts again and realised that I still have a long way to go, but I havent given up yet and thats the important...
    slh544 slh544 18-21, F Mar 9, 2013

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    Does The Psychiatrist Help?

    i recently told my mother about how i make my self throw up in order to make myself feel better about myself and how i cant stray away from this sadness that now consumes my life. my doctor has directed me towards a nutritionist and psychiatrist. does this help? has anyone gone...
    6688lrs 6688lrs 16-17, F 2 Responses Oct 19, 2013

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    Hello I'm New

     Hi everyone, My name is Alex(andra) but I go by Alex. I am 23 and have been a bulimic for six years now. Everyday I wonder what it is that triggered me into becoming a bulimic. It was my first year of university that I started and I guess it's just a coping mechanism for...
    Alex1986 Alex1986 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 23, 2009

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    Lost Lost Lost

    5 more lbs..... :) or :( FML
    AlyceOverTheRainbow AlyceOverTheRainbow 26-30, F May 31, 2011

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    I Feel Like Such A Fraud

    anyone looking from the outside would think my life is pretty good right now. maybe because ive become so good at hiding whats really going on in my life. ive just graduated from uni, got a job, etc etc and i have no reason to be depressed. but i am. im  so miserable. i...
    allybally49 allybally49 18-21, F 4 Responses Oct 18, 2009

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    I Can'T Be Getting it.....Right?

    I have battled depression for a while now and my body image has never been something I liked. I have always had this dislike, this frustration when it comes to my body. I have harmed myself but never done this. This is the third time I've forced myself to throw up in a month...
    UmbraEyes UmbraEyes 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 2, 2013

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    I won't eat anything

    until next year ^^ So i dun hv to purging anymore I want to end this year happily and Start good new year
    nownowhi nownowhi 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 22, 2013

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    Lost!

    I am a mother of 2 beautiful children and a wife of a wonderful husband, but I am an unhappy person.They say you can't make people happy unless you are happy yourself. I am 27 and I have been battling Bulimia for the last 15 years. It started when my family members started...
    asainville asainville 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 30, 2009

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    Sick And Tired

    My personal experience started in my teenage years when i was told continuously that i was fat by a boyfriend at the time and started to believe it; fast forward 30 years and i still believe it now, although that boyfriend is long gone. I don't know now whether it was that...
    barbarab barbarab 41-45 May 30, 2011

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    When Will It End...???

    I am am 29. I have been bulimic since I was 14. Anorexic from 15-19. A meth head from 20-24. I have f*cked myself up completely. But I am still bulimic. How can I stop? I've tried psychotherapy hypnothyerapy, counselling, CBT been bullied by friends (that care), antidepressants...
    Jaspa Jaspa 26-30, F 4 Responses Jul 3, 2008

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    I have been struggling with Bulimia

    and Depression for many years now. The bulimia comes and goes, but its always in the back of my head, its something I really struggle with, however the depression never really goes away. I mean, I have good days, hell I even have great days, but it never goes away for long...
    AlyAngel AlyAngel 22-25, F Dec 5, 2013

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    Betray!

    huh....m so deppressed.....i mean what's my fault just 2 fell in love.......ugh..i dn knw....whr did i go wrong......ma best frnd is showning me attitiude....she ditched me like she dn knw me when i seriouxly needed her.......i dn knw 2 trust whom and whom not.......m left wid no...
    sadnesslovesme sadnesslovesme 16-17, F Nov 18, 2011

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    HURTING Inside....

     Hey You guys, Funny to see how everybody HURTS INSIDE but smile outside.I'm 21 and started my "B"when i was 17. In a month and a half I lost an extreme amount of weight. Years went by and the ghost is always haunting me.Even if I promise myself, people around me...
    lanig lanig 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 7, 2009

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    I Uderatand

    Since I was 16 I have been swinging between, anorexia, bulimia and acohol addiction. It is so scary but I only feel good nwhen at least one of these demons is in playI find it really bad but comforting to function more easily as a bulimic than  to admit that I ...
    lookingglassal lookingglassal 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 6, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I was feeling so up for a couple weeks there, but now I've just plummeted right back down. Why is this so difficult? I'm getting so frustrated with myself because I can't even...
    spiffyoctopus spiffyoctopus 18-21, F Nov 20

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    I don't want to be bulimic anymore. But I do. But I don't. Uggg. It's messing up my health. I have a constant sore throat even though I haven't purged in two days and it only gets...
    yonnie97 yonnie97 16-17, F Dec 2

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    Please checkout the youtube channel douglas bloch it will save you please
    jon5400 jon5400 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 23

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    It's hitting me hard tonight. My dads in the hospital with congestive heart failure and I'm hurting deep. I must be strong though for my sisters. Hes not my biological dad but has...
    riddlesmile riddlesmile 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 25

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    Please check out the youtube channel douglas blotch it will save your life man
    jon5400 jon5400 18-21, M Nov 29

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    http://youtu.be/4Gp0QIXG4Aw please check this video out if you are suffering
    jon5400 jon5400 18-21, M 3 days ago

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    I am a semi normal 18 year old. I lived in a small town most of my life and then things went wrong. Long story short. Even before things went wrong I had started self harming. It...
    Slowlygoing18 Slowlygoing18 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Everyday in my mind is an endless battle. think of it as the 300 spartans, they never gave up but in the end they didnt win the battle. I'm slowly losing my battle with depression...
    Palavo88 Palavo88 26-30, M 2 Responses Nov 20

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    I've battled with depression for a long time. Most of my life honestly and lately here I've been learning a lot of things about myself. The one thing I've learned is to just be...
    Livinglife95 Livinglife95 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 11

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    OK I am; 60 epileptic, have been since I was about 8 diagnosed when I was 10. I've had surgery to remove brain tumor that stopped seizures for about 2 years. Worst thing that could...
    Scott1954 Scott1954 56-60, M 1 Response 4 hrs ago

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    And found that it's not wise to befriend someone who fights the same battle. It just sends you into a downward spiral. It's best to surround yourself with positive people. Their...
    JJjenniejones JJjenniejones 41-45, F 7 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    One of the worst things about depression is feeling bad for being depressed. Somehow, it feels like you're letting everyone down. Or, as if it's somehow a judgement of your family...
    MisterSerious MisterSerious 41-45, M 5 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Well throughout my life, mainly when I was in middle school onward, I have always thought of myself differently than others. I honestly hate everything about myself, especially my...
    thinkingflawless thinkingflawless 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 22

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    I'm not sure how much people will actually read this because it's going to be really long but basically I've struggled with depression my whole life . I'm not looking for attention...
    AlissaCupcakes AlissaCupcakes 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 25

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    All my life I have battled depression and my depression is extremely bad for me...all I have to do is look at a knife or anything dangerous and all I want to do is hurt myself...
    Scarsdontfade Scarsdontfade 18-21, F 4 Responses 3 days ago

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    When i lay down at night, all of my past comes up and haunts me until i close my eyes and drift off.. Sleep is the only true happiness i have right now. I was doing so well i was...
    MichellexxLevine314 MichellexxLevine314 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 6

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    Depression is horrible. Nights are the worst for me, as I've heard it is for most who battle depression. For me, it's mainly because the most traumatizing experiences have happened...
    sarrmar sarrmar 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 23

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    Out of all the battles in my life this one is my biggest challenge. I've become a master of pretending everything is okay for everyone else's sake, but there has been a steep...
    Welllaugh Welllaugh 36-40, F 5 Responses Dec 5

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    has anyone done NeuroStar Therapy Treatment for depression? here? if so. has it worked?. im on an anti depressant called Brintellix. it is not working anymore. at first it did...
    Jacqueline779 Jacqueline779 26-30, F Dec 7

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    so... here I am... in a hospital, ive been here for weeks now... stomach repaired, organs back online. and the discharge is around the corner. the doctors tell me that I have...
    lostunit lostunit 26-30, M 6 Responses Dec 7

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    I battle depression it's hard to describe how I feel. One body knows what I have not even my mom but i think it's better that way . I will never understand what triggered the...
    Adel14 Adel14 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 11

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    It's heart breaking to know there is 65,000 people on this app & more people who battle depression every single day, as well as myself. I just want to say that I love and am proud...
    aquasea aquasea 16-17, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    i battle depression a lot. i am very overwhelmed and lonely. i miss my old friends on my old ep account before i couldn't get access to it. i am angry and lonely constantly. i wake...
    db174 db174 31-35, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I'm not sure how much people will actually read this because it's going to be really long but basically I've struggled with depression my whole life . I'm not looking for attention...
    AlissaCupcakes AlissaCupcakes 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 25

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    This is a journal I wrote on August 17, 2012 about my parents finding out about my bulimia: they found out! my secrets are all out! I have no more privacy no more dignity and all...
    yonnie97 yonnie97 16-17, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I know that I definitely have depression and I suffer desperately from suicidal thoughts, but I shouldn't! I have a generally loving family, I am doing well for someone who is...
    PinkWink PinkWink 18-21, F Nov 24

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    So I'm 14 years old and my entire life I have suffered with anxiety but in the past year or so it's gotten A LOT worse along with the starting of my depression. My dads an...
    lachica12100 lachica12100 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 24

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    I’m not crazy. I’m not dumb. I don’t want to die, but I often feel like I want to take my own life. I am not dangerous to anyone but myself. I don’t need to be taught a...
    FadingStar17 FadingStar17 16-17, F 3 Responses Nov 25