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I Battle Depression and Anxiety

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 20,892 People

    My depression has never been good,

    I haven't had a good period for as long as I can remember. My "good" periods were when the meds began working and I could hide the fact that I was depressed from the one's around me. When it was bad I couldn't get out of bed and didn't eat or sleep, or I would do nothing but...
    lily449 lily449 18-21, F 3 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    I took this photo earlier

    when I was out on a walk to distract myself from panicking. It's beautiful. I live near the countryside so walking up fields with my dogs really helps calm me down.
    gh0st13 gh0st13 18-21, F 5 Responses Aug 11

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    It's really bad tonight.

    I never know what to do in these drowning moments. I feel like screaming until my voice disappears. More than anything I would like to sleep. And not have my heart racing like this.
    TooLateForEdelweiss TooLateForEdelweiss 18-21, F 5 Responses Nov 15

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    I really hate this. it feels like everything is

    going wrong and I can't do anything about it. I just got home after working all night and now I can't sleep because anxiety is eating away at my insides.
    beingbrye beingbrye 22-25, T 2 Responses Dec 13

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    I never realized this before,

    but I have this thing. I become addicted to things, I always need to be doing something, like eating nuts or pumpkin seeds. I always have to keep my hands busy, when I don't I feel like I'm going crazy. I get so restless and can't study or do anything. It takes all of my energy...
    lily449 lily449 18-21, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Depression is feeling like you've lost something

    but having no clue when or where you had it. Then one day you realize what you lost is yourself.
    Erinjessica Erinjessica 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 5

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    Things have been very hard lately

    and that's why I haven't been on EP. I'm just very overwhelmed in my life so it was hard for me to talk to others... I tend to hide when things are really bad. But I decided to post this for anyone that was wondering where I went or why I haven't responded to anything in some...
    MyDaddysSpecialGirl MyDaddysSpecialGirl 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 9

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    its been a little over a month

    since my major suicide attept, rending me a test subject to the medical and policing systems of my nation... this ast attempt has taught me one huge lesson. It hurts more if you fail. why you ask. cause now you have people looking over you, asking the questions, questions that...
    lostunit lostunit 26-30, M 5 Responses Dec 11

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    I wanna do everything

    and nothing at the same time..
    SammiSakura SammiSakura 13-15, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    For me the worst part of anxiety is the

    symptoms. I thought I had it figured out, and knew what to expect when I'm having an attack, but then the rules changed. I had a bunch of anxiety attacks within three days. Normally I have diarrhea, stomach pains, minor tension in my shoulders and bouts of rage. But instead I...
    Torapie Torapie 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 9

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    I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas

    or a Happy Holiday this year! I know it's a struggle for those of us who suffer from depression or have great amounts of anxiety. Just remember to get up in the morning,breathe and be strong. Lots of love to all!
    ComplicatedGirl18 ComplicatedGirl18 18-21, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    I'm proud of my self

    for leaving my bedroom and got ready and just went to my local shopping centre for a walk and just to get some fresh air and try to face the world...I'm sweating like crazy but I'm trying to face my demons if I can do it so can you it's really hard took me guts to do this all by...
    pardz pardz 22-25, M 3 Responses Apr 29

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    I cried myself to sleep last night.

    I went through the whole day with a straight face, walking around feeling out of touch with my surroundings, soon as I got home and into bed, I started thinking about how lonely I am and how I'm never gonna be normal and happy like everyone else, and I started crying...
    Lunarlight Lunarlight 18-21, F 10 Responses Apr 18

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    If you’re feeling suicidal,

    please read this first. Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and...
    akaShaun akaShaun 16-17, M 7 Responses May 8

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    Yes this is me. And this time of year is never

    good. I miss being joyful I miss being excited I miss being happy. I really miss me.
    imjustaguy38 imjustaguy38 36-40, M 1 Response Dec 11

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    It's weird waking up on Christmas

    and thinking of everything you have and nothing you have. I remember having a place that I would go to in my own mind. Rightly named "Mommy." A place in my imagination where I had to create what I thought a real mommy might be like. And she was a queen. All I needed. She knew...
    Jaielll Jaielll 18-21, F 2 hrs ago

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    I stopped taking my happy pills

    because I started to feel no feelings... I wasn't happy nor sad and nothing phases me In the past week I have been noticing changes tho, taking things seriously, getting up set over stupid things, I have called work sick today because I just couldn't get out of bed... I'm...
    lifeisnottoobad lifeisnottoobad 18-21, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    Depression/Anxiety

    Well, it's four o'clock in the morning and I am online researching how to make this depression go away. I google and google and I find this website and decide to share my story. This is pretty much every night these days. In March 2006, my friend died in an accident. I was best...
    depressionhurts98 depressionhurts98 19-21, F 71 Responses Nov 20, 2007

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    I Am My Own Hostage.

    For the average person, getting out of bed & getting ready for the day is a normal, worry free morning routine. But for many of us just the sound of the alarm clock is that dreaded noise that reminds us that we must struggle through another uncomfortable, meaningless day full of...
    dublingal5 dublingal5 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 21, 2013

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    An Open Letter To All Who Suffer

     An Open Letter to All Who Suffer I know…  I have suffered from depression and despair since I was seven years old and my mother tried to kill herself the first time.  I know how deep a person can sink when they believe the whole world is piled up on...
    LonghornFan LonghornFan 56-60, M 21 Responses Jan 5, 2010

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    Depression is like sitting in the corner of a

    crowded room watching everyone around you enjoy life while you struggle to remember what you are living for...
    ComplicatedGirl18 ComplicatedGirl18 18-21, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    does anyone else feel numb

    and distant alot of the time? like youre there, but youre not?
    deathbecomesher89 deathbecomesher89 22-25, F 13 Responses Feb 6

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    Zack607 Zack607 22-25, M 5 Responses Dec 15

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    Four months ago, my depression had me at my

    lowest point. I had been going downhill for the past year, and I decided to move to another state and get a fresh start. I can honestly say it was the best choice I've ever made. I have never been so mentally and emotionally sound. I have been happy every day for almost four...
    HeartlessSinner HeartlessSinner 22-25, F 2 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Yes been there, fought it

    and still do. I have to be aware and manage myself and my energy. I find it sad that there are so many people out there that have some form or degree of depression and or anxiety. It's really not a very nice thing to have in life and is extremely difficult and excruciatingly...
    Kynkanjis Kynkanjis 36-40, M Dec 7, 2013

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    3 shades: Black White & Grey What are the

    colors of the rainbow? Most eyes see a vibrant world painted by the full color spectrum soaking up the light prisms as they cast wavelengths of different variations and shades to create primary and secondary colors. The chapters of my life story are colorblind. My world consists...
    writingmyrelease writingmyrelease 26-30, F Dec 11

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    Been increasingly absent,

    and find it difficult to even try to be present and mindful. I have noticed the connection of this to anxiety, which has been high this past week. Even my dreams are unsettling. Today I had to keep moving to fight the urge to go back to bed and let the mindless state take over...
    squirrelbounce squirrelbounce 41-45, F 4 Responses Nov 30

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    I can't take this anymore!

    !! I'm so anxious. Felt like I was gonna have a panic attack al day. Still feels like it. I'm shaking abn my heart is beating fast. Please just kill m!!!
    yonnie97 yonnie97 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 16

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    Same ****, different day.

    1. Cant get out of bed 2. Cant concentrate at school 3. Cant stop eating 4. Drowsy as **** for no apparent reason 5. Crawl into bed after a failed attempt at writing down my feelings and wish I didnt have to face tomorrow.... Cool lyf
    urlaame urlaame 18-21, F 4 Responses Oct 29

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    Some days no matters how hard you try,

    nothing seems to get right. My usual self would say, go to sleep, and keep trying tomorrow will bring something new, maybe better... who knows.. but today I'm not my usual self, honestly I have days like that, but didn't want to worry anybody, I had the feeling something bad was...
    valeMar valeMar 41-45 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    As it's the only subject

    that I'm unable to put words to.. I shall just leave this here..
    JaneBloodyAusten JaneBloodyAusten 31-35, F 11 Responses Sep 1

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    im just so tired.... sometimes i just want to

    sleep forever. never wake up. So exhausted from fighting my whole life, from trying to be strong and move forward. sometimes i feel like i want to stop trying, stop fighting and just let go...
    Spinningoutofcontrol Spinningoutofcontrol 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 10

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    I hate how much I hate my life,

    I consider just ending it all every day, and I'm sure the only reason I am alive is because I can't stand the thought of causing any pain to my family, people say there are painless ways to kill yourself but there aren't someone is always going I get hurt. So I'm stuck living in...
    JustJess97 JustJess97 16-17, F 8 Responses Jul 4

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    You let certain people into your life

    and you think they will be a true friend to you always... but they always end up hurting you even when you think they act like they'll be there.. they won't.
    Summerandroses Summerandroses 22-25, F 8 Responses Jun 13

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    When people say something mean to me I try to

    hold myself back from crying
    chrislawson141 chrislawson141 13-15, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    It's been 4 years full of lost hope,

    failed attempts to reach out, nights of crying myself to sleep, and of finding no solutions. I guess I finally stopped really trying to get help from anyone in my life so the internet has become my best therapist.
    LisetteDS LisetteDS 18-21, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I feel so sick. Depressed

    and full of anxiety. Knowing Christmas is upon us, I worked so hard for my money. Like soooooo hard. Just for it to be stolen I'm so upset. I had already called the cops but they haven't done anything. I'm so mad because my phone is just off. Can't make calls or texts, I have...
    sloaned sloaned 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I Have To Keep My Focus ... Or Else I Will Fall.

    I think the hardest pain to overcome... is the one that makes you 'see' that life moves forward with or without you that connections with others are temporary and abandonment or betrayal are things innate in human beings. This kind of truth has implications.... such as...
    DreamChristine DreamChristine 31-35, F 8 Responses Mar 16, 2013

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    Have you ever feel like your life doesn't

    belong to you anymore? As if you were absolutely powerless, and your life is gonna be determined by the circumstances, by external factors. I feel as a mere viewer of my own life, totally and completely helpless.
    LookingForTheSunshine LookingForTheSunshine 26-30, F 5 Responses 3 days ago

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    Im not running anymore,

    and I'm not going to bury my troubles while pretending they don't exist... I am depressed and I suffer from it every single day. I can't do anything without thinking about what depresses me. My life is ruled by the thought of one person that was once apart of my life and I have...
    Suddanlius Suddanlius 22-25, M 5 Responses Nov 19

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    So, it's Christmas Eve

    and I just had to promise myself I wouldn't relapse now. I've gotten far. Had to take 3x my normal Xanax dose after telling myself that I don't deserve to punish myself tonight of all nights. My mind is a mess and there's no one to talk to. These thoughts that won't shut up. I...
    Khaleesi18 Khaleesi18 18-21, F 14 hrs ago

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    Sometimes I look in the mirror

    and I'm honestly surprised to see there's still a person there. I'm hurting so much that my emotions have overwhelmed me completely and taken full possession of myself to the point as I feel I AM my pain, my hopelessness and my fears, as if they have stolen my identity, as if...
    LookingForTheSunshine LookingForTheSunshine 26-30, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Do You Know How It Feels....

    ......to be put down and debased your whole ******* life? To be used and abused your whole ******* life? To be told you wasn't meant to be born and are ******* useless and are going to die soon? To be verbally, physically, mentally and emotionally abused amongst other types of...
    Lilith2013 Lilith2013 36-40, F 21 Responses Sep 14, 2013

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    Depression.

    You know when your so depressed, you just wanna stay home all day in your blankies, not do anything, and just die in your bubble of self pity?Thats the depression I have right now. I just feel like giving up everything and saying "**** it world goodbye" because I know if I die...
    oreosnow oreosnow 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 3, 2013

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    Omissions are betrayals.

    That's all I want to say but this asinine app requires atleast 25 characters
    HopefullRomantic HopefullRomantic 22-25, F 4 days ago

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    Uplifting Depression: 15 Unexpected Lessons From Adversity

    1. Don’t ignore warning signals in your body. Frequent petty colds, stomach aches, and headaches may all be a sign of stress. 2. There is no need to be strong all the time, and even less of a need to maintain an image of strength in front of others. 3. Achievements and titles...
    roots2life roots2life 46-50, M 20 Responses Jan 15, 2012

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    Going to the doctor in a couple of weeks to

    start medication. Things will get better soon hopefully :)
    greysluver greysluver 13-15, F 3 Responses Dec 8

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    I feel like I cannot truly enjoy life.

    . . I get paranoid at times and then my mind obsesses over the worst case scenario. I get really depression and even I should be having a good time. . . it's like I am not there 100%. I feel I simply let people down. I sometimes feel that most people would be better without...
    RebekahWriter13 RebekahWriter13 31-35, F 3 Responses Dec 14

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    I Am Alive

    Here I am searching through the fog. The fog is so thick I can't see where I'm going and I don't know where I'm at, but I am alive. I look behind me into my past and I can see most of where I have been. I see people I care for, people I miss, some good memories, but the hideous...
    keeva keeva 46-50, F 15 Responses Nov 30, 2012

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    I have severe anxiety

    which seems to have manifested into horrible health anxiety (hypochondria) and now I can't even leave my house to go to school because I've convinced myself I'm dying somehow. Either that I'm ignoring a symptom and the doctor overlooked an issue I FEEL sick and I can feel the...
    overlordmisha overlordmisha 18-21, F 5 Responses Dec 17

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    Gloom and doom is always lingering

    as of lately. I want out of this so bad. I am angry at people for being people. Disgusted with myself. The world is an ugly place. I don't trust, I can't smile. This is not the me I want to be. I don't want to feel this pain any longer. I just want to feel awake again. And I...
    Femmeheartsoul Femmeheartsoul 36-40, F 4 Responses Sep 28

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