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I Battle Depression

If you're looking for depression support, meet a group of friendly people fighting depression and the feeling of being depressed. 63,509 People

    Suicide is on my mind.

    ... Again... Tonight is going to be bad.... Cutting tons....
    MichaelOKBurns MichaelOKBurns 13-15, M 5 mins ago

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    The Stigma

    There is a reason the subject of mental illness is so vitally important to me.  I know it intimately.  Having lived with chronic clinical depression most of my life, I've learned to deal with it, to function, to manage.  In that way, depression is similar to...
    SeriouslySappy SeriouslySappy 51-55, F 145 Responses Sep 16, 2009

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    Clock Ticks, Nothing Changes

    The sweeping hand tick tick ticks, but nothing ever changes.  And you need the time to pass.  Not because you have anywhere to be; you don’t. You never have anywhere to be.  You just need the time to be anywhere but now, here.  Tick tick tick.  You...
    Little Bird Little Bird 31-35, F 203 Responses Apr 12, 2006

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    Well I'll make this a die-ary entry.

    .. I'm just waking up... Its Saturday and they normally don't work on the damage on the building today but I guess they decided to today. I'm cold, and feeling lonely... I don't feel like getting up for a lot of reasons... Mostly cause I have no reason to get up...
    lostunit lostunit 26-30, M 2 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Depression Is...

    DEPRESSION IS NOT A STATE OF MIND! I am a Psychology major and it completely breaks my heart when I hear someone talking about someone who is depressed or wants to commit suicide. Depression is a mental DISEASE. Just like if you were to have cancer or a physical disease...
    InnerBeauty12 InnerBeauty12 18-21, F 41 Responses Nov 12, 2012

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    Battling Depression

    Everyday it seems that as soon as I enter my room my smile fades. My mind begins to fill with questions, and all I see is shadows. I have been battling depression for about 10 years now. No one has a clue at all, it is my darkest secret. Everything is a blur, I am not happy at...
    TaylorIW TaylorIW 13-15, F 31 Responses Sep 28, 2012

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    Telling me I can't be sad

    because someone has it harder in life than I do, is like saying someone can't be happy because someone has a better life than them.
    NoOrdinaryDork NoOrdinaryDork 18-21, F 20 Responses Jul 7

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    1livingstars 1livingstars 16-17, F 11 Responses Aug 10

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    Confessions Of A Chronic Teenager - June 5, 2013

    Warning! This is a fairly long piece. Feel free to get your popcorn now, because this might take a while :P This was the final paper for an English class that I took last semester. Most kids had about a month and a half to write theirs, while I had a less than a couple of weeks...
    Vermonsterr Vermonsterr 18-21, F 11 Responses Sep 8, 2013

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    Joining this forum is my rock bottom.

    Because I never thought I'd end up as a loser who can't face her own problems. Terrible.
    Sicknconfused Sicknconfused 26-30, F 4 Responses 52 mins ago

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    Depression really is a sickness.

    It’s like getting a cold. One day, you’ll feel slightly off. You’ll think to yourself, ‘this is weird, it’s a beautiful day but I kind of don’t like anything,’ and shrug it off. The next day you’ll sit in your room for a while, unable to do anything because you...
    frankiee23 frankiee23 22-25, M 3 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    Definitely feeling nauseous,

    probably from the new Viibryd medication I am taking. Let's hope it's just temporary, and I don't end up puking. >_<;;
    rollingdoro rollingdoro 22-25, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    Can I just put it out there

    that all of the fcking 13-14 year old kids who are part of this and think "oh I'm sad cause mummy wouldn't buy me this" or "oh I'm so sad because I had a crush on a boy and he doesn't like me" need to stop being dumb and get back to being a kid. Fgs depression is a mental...
    JPSmith24 JPSmith24 16-17, M 39 Responses Aug 28

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    I avoid negative people every chance I get.

    ..and that has helped tremendously.
    Lithos Lithos 51-55, M 2 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    Dealing With Depression

    My problems with depression seemed to slowly and quietly twist their way into my life for years.  At points it was so subtle I would be able to ignore it, or push it away, or think that it was just another bad day, nothing out of the ordinary.  Somehow day after day...
    suzanneontheriver suzanneontheriver 26-30, F 56 Responses Jul 12, 2006

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    A bit more down tonight then usual my eyes want

    to cry but my head keeps telling me crying is stupid. This is why i use to cut to get these stupid feelings out but i stopped i fight all the time with myself. I will not cut But my wrist want it I will not cry But my eyes want it I want to scream!
    TheGirlYoullFall4 TheGirlYoullFall4 22-25, F 2 hrs ago

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    Depression is so weird.

    We put on happy faces to hide the fact that we are in fact so depressed, but at the same time, we pray for someone to notice and be able to help. For as long as I can remember, I've been hoping someone would be able to just KNOW that I'm not right, because I do such a good job...
    Sarah196 Sarah196 18-21, F 31 Responses Jan 12

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    Looking back, there was great intelligence in

    my 20+ years of depression. There was actually grace inherent in life bringing me to my knees. (Sometimes life brings you to your knees so you can finally be present to your own knees!). There was healing there, right at the very core of my loss of interest in going to work or...
    Shanti00 Shanti00 41-45, F 3 hrs ago

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    5 Things Not to Say to the Depressed.

    1. Cheer up, turn that frown upside down, think happy thoughts !!   We are of course happy that the solution to our misery is as simple as turning it off and smiling .. why didn't we think of this ourselves? .. oh that's right cos its utter rubbish. Comments like this...
    SamOnHisSoapbox SamOnHisSoapbox 41-45, M 94 Responses Aug 11, 2009

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    "There's no one to call cause I'm just playing

    games with them all. The more I swear I'm happy the more that I'm feeling alone. Cause I spend every hour just going through the motions, I can't even get the emotions to come out. Dry as a bone, and I just wanna shout!" -"What Now" Rihanna
    PurpleHart PurpleHart 16-17, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

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    Some days I feel completely fine.

    Some days I'm actually happy. But some days I just want to die. I battle with myself. No one has won yet. The good should always win but will it? School is stressing me out. I also have no self esteem or self confidence so anytime I'm around people I freak out and I feel like...
    Niamh808 Niamh808 13-15, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I spent the first 23 years of my life wanting

    to die. And here is what I discovered: The urge to die is the urge to live in disguise. The urge to die is the urge to disappear as a separate self, to vanish into the vastness of Being, to rest deeply, as we have never rested before. It is the wave longing to return to the...
    Shanti00 Shanti00 41-45, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    My friends and boyfriend think I overact.

    Think I'm to sensitive. I tell them if it was up to me I would be like this. They tell me then don't. They don't understand. It's not that easy. I am emotionally. I get hurt. I feel like I either shut down shut them out. Lie to the people I love and fake a smile. Or let it out...
    TheGirlThatAlwaysSmiles TheGirlThatAlwaysSmiles 18-21, F 76 Responses Dec 10, 2013

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    My Baby Girl

    I had a miscarriage when I was fifteen and almost five months pregnant with my baby girl Gianna. It was the most hardest thing I ever went through. It was so horrible. I had an older boyfriend who I was very much in love with. We became intimate three months into our relationship...
    KandyLuv KandyLuv 26-30, F 19 Responses Aug 27, 2013

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    I'm A Miracle

    All my life I was told that I was ugly, fat, worthless, and that I would never be anything. Sometimes, I want to believe those things. But I learned that I am beautiful no matter what my body type is. I am me. No one can change that. I learned that life is too short to stress...
    imperfectperfectionist123 imperfectperfectionist123 16-17, F 6 Responses Aug 21, 2013

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    Depression is not easy.

    Never easy. Depression, loneliness, anxiety, fear, procrastination - whatever evil it may be called. But one thing is for sure, it is debilitating. It is heart-wrenching. It is spirit-breaking, even mind-freezing. It sucked the spirit of life in you. Makes you feel both hopeless...
    TitaniumSkyScraper TitaniumSkyScraper 31-35, F 31 Responses Jun 16

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    Girls I will always listen to you

    and I will never judge you :)
    britishcutie britishcutie 18-21, M 18 mins ago

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    Considering giving up on everything

    and peacefully drifting to blackness... I'm worthless... I truly feel worthless if there's a god kill me in my sleep tonight please... I feel like laying on train tracks in the rain and counting each raindrop to hit my forehead until I enter the sleep I've been longing for...
    MissLorii MissLorii 18-21, F 3 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    I've been strong for way to long.

    Hanging by a shredded thread. What's the point of hanging on,When no one would notice if I was gone. It feels like I'm a puppet, controlled by the darkest pain. This is not living, this is being alive but bottling everything up on the inside.persecuted for the way I feel but I...
    guitarlove24 guitarlove24 18-21, F 3 Responses 56 mins ago

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    Happiness

    Maybe I'm a dreamer Maybe I'm misunderstood Maybe you're not seeing the side of me you should Maybe I'm crazy Maybe I'm the only one Maybe I'm just out of touch Maybe I've just had enough Maybe it's time to change And leave it all behind I've never been one to walk alone I've...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Aug 9, 2013

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    Rip Robin Williams I got to meet him a couple

    of years ago at a function dinner in Las Vegas. I will never forget that experience because I felt he was a very dark, sad, and tortured individual. He seemed very very manic and unsettled yet also very sad. He had been in pain for years. I hope he is at peace.
    Brisco221 Brisco221 31-35, M 13 Responses Aug 11

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    Everyone Needs To Read This

    Depression is humiliating. It turns intelligent, kind people into zombies who can’t wash a dish or change their socks. It affects the ability to think clearly, to feel anything, to ascribe value to your children, your lifelong passions, your relative good fortune. It scoops out...
    genetica genetica 26-30, F 79 Responses Jan 24, 2013

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    I'm really sick and tired of people telling me

    to change my view, think positive. They make it sound like I can flip a switch and automatically improve every single aspect of my life. It's not easy, I have depression. If I could just flip a switch and be happy and positive don't you think I would have done it already? I've...
    BleuGirl83 BleuGirl83 31-35, F 16 Responses May 27

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    I've always got made fun of

    for being fat. Just yesterday, one of my moms close friends; daughter called me fat. She said I should go see a doctor for some pills. It really hurt, that I had to shake it off and pretend it didn't hurt as much as it did. I wanted to go home and cry. But then I remember my...
    Maruahoran Maruahoran 13-15, F 4 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    I don't plan on living much longer.

    In fact I think I came up with a plan. And I'm going to start executing it now... I'm too broken, nothing to do, no one to really talk to and even if there was there isn't anything to say. I'm unhappy. I've tried talking to my doctor and such... But I'm too broken.
    lostunit lostunit 26-30, M 8 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I battle depression,

    and also anxiety. I suffered from being mentally abused by mother pretty much my entire life. My own mother told me she hated me, she thought I was ugly, stupid and that my Dad wanted me aborted. My entire I felt hopeless and alone. I was planning on killing myself but when the...
    acw012192 acw012192 22-25, F 36 Responses Dec 10, 2013

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    Made the decision to go inpatient tomorrow

    and try to get the help I need. I'm nervous but I know it's what I need to do. Praying that I won't have to be in there longer than a week.
    LaBellaVita19 LaBellaVita19 18-21, F 1 Response 4 hrs ago

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    Hold Your Happiness Close. Hold Your Depression Even Closer.

    I just heard a story on the radio about a woman who travels alone in places like Sudan and the Phillipines in areas where rebels of all different kinds live. She told a couple of stories of how she handled herself when faced by a group of teenage men with guns. She would march...
    wundayatta wundayatta 56-60, M 21 Responses May 19, 2010

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    To everyone out there battling depression,

    you aren't alone! I know it's hard but we are all in this together. I know I don't know you guys, but stay hopeful, stay alive, stay weird.😊😋
    Jbranch14 Jbranch14 18-21, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    Happiness Is A Choice? Bullshit.......

    If you honestly deal with depression, you know that you "don't have a choice". People who say that happiness is a choice, don't deal with depression. I'm sorry but it's been proven that chemicals off-balanced in the brain, contribute to depression. Telling a person who has been...
    peachturnover peachturnover 31-35, F 31 Responses Jul 28, 2013

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    I ave been trying to focus

    and smile going forward lately, having lost the love of my life I've struggled to control my anxiety and depression. Increasing become worse but the more I have to fake everything. Now my family is begging to pressure me into things because they can't cope in fear of things...
    seanv14 seanv14 26-30, M 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    Why should I do something with my life?

    I'd only give this world another chance to hurt me.What life is there to live when I have nothing to gain or lose? I was abused by my parents before I was raped. I was long broken before then and that just shattered what was left. I would have been manically depressed if I...
    Oldwounds Oldwounds 18-21, M 4 Responses 1 hr ago

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    Any ideas how to overcome feeling depressed

    when looking at childhood photos of my mom?
    fiendforlife fiendforlife 31-35, M 4 hrs ago

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    Sweetgirl120 Sweetgirl120 18-21, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    My "dark" Friend

    I wake up in the morning and before I can open my eyes I know that its there. The covers are heavy with sweat from nightmares I'll never remember. I inhale deeply through my nose, it must have woken it up. "Good night sleep?" it asks. "You know it wasn't." I can hear it...
    WhyBother22 WhyBother22 22-25, M 24 Responses Nov 6, 2011

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    In November 2001, I suffered a breakdown

    and was diagnosed with PTSD and Major Depression. My depression was treatment-resistant; fortunately about 10 years later I found an effective antidepressant. I say fortunately, because I know some struggle much longer. There were days when hope was so far gone and the psychic...
    onomatopoeiaCA onomatopoeiaCA 41-45, F 18 Responses Feb 14

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    If you dont have depression,

    dont even bother telling me life gets better. The fact is, your living a happy life, and you dont understand what I am going through. If you dont have depression, you will never understand.
    NoOrdinaryDork NoOrdinaryDork 18-21, F 29 Responses Jul 3

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    Depression Is Something You Can't Turn Off......

    and you have no control over your mood swings and other peoples views. I hate hearing people say things like "get over yourself" or "your just doing/saying that for attention" I personally have not had to endure that here on EP, but have seen it said to others. it is not the...
    TwilightDream TwilightDream 36-40, F 37 Responses Oct 22, 2011

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    ghostintherain ghostintherain 41-45, M 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I ******' hate depression.

    I would take my bouts with anxiety any day. When you feel anxious you are productive in trying to alleviate it. When you're depressed you can't do a ******* thing. It seems to just paralyze you.
    fiendforlife fiendforlife 31-35, M 2 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    What real scares us so much

    that it stops many of us from committing suicide ? But keeps us wallowing in pain ? Please don't give me that BS about hurting other people , that's not it .
    ghostintherain ghostintherain 41-45, M 4 Responses 1 hr ago

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    This Is For You.

    This is for you. I'm sorry you got bullied for being gay. I'm sorry your parents kicked you out for being a lesbian. I'm sorry you were raped as a little girl. I'm sorry your dad left you and your mom with nothing. I'm sorry you get bullied every day. I'm sorry you have no...
    IWillMakeYouThink IWillMakeYouThink 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 26, 2012

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    I am so tired of the pretend to care crap on

    this website. People who truly need help are bombarded with other's messages that pretend to care, while they turn the conversation to their problems or offer ridiculous and cliched advice. There are no magic words to cure true depression. We just want someone to listen, to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 13 Responses Jun 9

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