I Battle Mood Swings and Depression

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 608 People

    It is a struggle when you're doing everything

    possible to better yourself. Sometimes I feel like it's not even worth it and just should give up on my goals. It is so difficult for me each day to build up courage to go work. Any time that I'm not working, I get anxious just thinking about going to a public place. If someone...
    macadamx macadamx
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Dec 8, 2014

    hate the depressed black moods.

    much better when things balance out back normal. i thank the supportive people who give that nudge when i need it. i do appreciate it even as i regret burdening others with it. though i admit my writing has gotten fairly decent when the black hits. its not worth it. id...
    ArnoldJRimmer ArnoldJRimmer
    46-50, M
    Jan 11

    There are days when I simply can't get out of

    bed and I am so depressed I just want to get myself drown. They last forever. Usually, on holidays. I can't even read. I just want to sleep and wish everyone and everything else would disappear. I am unable to study neither do any projects. HELP. Seriously. If anybody had it...
    sweetheartss sweetheartss
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 30, 2014

    Even when I don't feel depressed,

    that black cloud is always looming nearby. There are times when I'm completely numb...I realize that I should be feeling something, anything, but I don't. At least if I feel sad or miserable, I feel something. It would be amazing to feel happiness more often, but I just don't...
    MommySarah79 MommySarah79
    36-40, F
    May 25, 2014

    A Thermos Full Of Acid.

    I feel like there is one of these buried inside me. I know how I am supposed to be, and so I put a shell around this thermos and painted it to look human. Human with a sense of humor even. But this thermos is always there. Part of me is always, no matter how I actually feel, in...
    MadGeniusGentleman MadGeniusGentleman
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Jul 1, 2011

    I have been doing so well these past few months.

    I've felt genuinely happy quite frequently... but twice this week I have had bad moments of intense anger. I keep it inside, but I have to hide myself in my room so I can cry. Every time I get angry like this, I have very self-destructive thoughts that I feel I can't control. I...
    SacredEarth SacredEarth
    22-25, F
    Sep 14, 2014

    I hate the fact that one minute I am

    so happy like I have no care in the world and life is so beautiful and perfect next minute reality kicks in and I find out what is wrong with me and why is all this happening and I cry so bitterly I feel like life just doesn't seem to stop kicking you in the face I hate seeing...
    Mitsy95 Mitsy95
    18-21, F
    Jun 18, 2014

    Bipolar Much?!?!?

     A while ago I was diagnosed as being bipolar II.  The main difference between I and II is that BPI-ers tend to be at either extreme for weeks/months at a time, while BPII-ers like me can swing day to day, or even hour to hour. It's a pain in the azz. I can go from...
    Geode Geode
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Sep 17, 2009

    I'm so tired of it of you don't hae depression

    you wouldn't understand I'm not even me anymore
    DemonLugia DemonLugia
    18-21, M
    1 Response Sep 16, 2015

    My mood changes a lot,

    at school I'm a positive person but when I get home I'm just all depressed, cause the person at school is a whole different me! Need some one to talk to about this, and whowill listen to me
    Nik20954 Nik20954
    16-17, M
    1 Response Jan 26, 2014

    I hate movements like this.

    .. I feel so hurt and helpless, it's like my heart is breaking all over again hut I'm. it sure why. all i wanna do it hug up to you and cry forever.~ it almost feels like grief, like I've lost someone close to me. on top I not feeling pretty, not living myself enough, being...
    mentallyhigh mentallyhigh
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Sep 19, 2015

    I hate when you feel decent,

    happy almost, and then it disappears, and you feel insignificant and depressed again. It comes out of nowhere pretty much, and it completely takes you over.
    maiomeN maiomeN
    18-21, F
    Aug 21, 2014

    Ever since I was born I've battled with

    depression my doctors don't know how to stop it when I was younger they tried putting me on so many meds and nothing has worked and I still battle depression I've tried so much to improve my life but nothing worse it just becomes even more **** everyday when is this nightmare...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jan 11, 2015

    Who's that knock, knock,

    knocking at the door? - It's that old devious devil and his dark dog returning to stay a while. What fascinates me (and worries me deeply) about depression, or at least my experiences of it ,as I can't speak for others, is the total shift in perspective that can arise from...
    LowRise LowRise
    41-45, M
    1 Response Feb 18, 2015

    Since I joined EP I have noticed

    that I have serious mood swings, one moment, my life is heaven and the next it's hell. Although, I think the happiness is just a bad attemt of my brain to cheer me up. it doesn't last that long, exept for yesterday when I was happy all day, but that was just because I was...
    PigMonkeyHybrid PigMonkeyHybrid
    18-21, M
    Oct 4, 2015

    Down And Up

    I get these sudden feelingsI don't know where they come fromI always try to keep themBut they always seem to runI always try and followI can never keep upI'll just sit here in my sorrowWaiting for them againUp and downDown and upThat's how I always feelJust don't ask if something...
    Bvbaddict Bvbaddict
    13-15, F
    1 Response Dec 10, 2011

    Its Called Being Bipolar....

    its called being bipolar, i deal with mood swings all the damn time. they are one of the worst, and my depression is so bad sometimes.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    6 Responses Sep 17, 2009

    And because of this I've lost more then half of

    my friends. I've pushed everyone away. Even my family. I'm officially alone and it just makes matters worse.
    Tamika123 Tamika123
    16-17, F
    1 Response May 9, 2014

    I also feel this ??Transformers 3 - Battle (The

    Score - Soundtrack) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFlzwJAfPoU?? ??Transformers 3 - Sentinel Prime (The Score - Soundtrack) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFFDG5FRbWk??
    iloveblackfire2222 iloveblackfire2222
    13-15, M
    Dec 31, 2015

    I Don't Understand.

    It's just after 7pm here and I've been having an OK day.  Until about 10 minutes ago.  I don't understand why my mood swings the way it does.  Things were going OK today then for no reason I can understand I suddenly found myself feeling extremely depressed, lonely...
    Dropbear Dropbear
    46-50, M
    3 Responses Oct 17, 2009

    i cry sometimes not noing

    why i snap at peole around me and then i cry i dont no why
    tgrakes tgrakes
    26-30, F
    Aug 13, 2014

    what I feel when I am depressed?

    ?Requiem For A Dream Original Song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5Kwf_nNmGI?? ??Assassin's Creed Revelations (The Complete Recordings) OST - Labored and Lost (Track 54) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I79tVEDL724?? ??Assassin's Creed 2 Ezio's Family {Extended for 30 Minutes...
    iloveblackfire2222 iloveblackfire2222
    13-15, M
    1 Response Dec 31, 2015

    Sometimes I wonder what the people

    who act like they care about me would do if they knew how many times they've almost lost me within the past few months. Sometimes I wonder if they would even care
    alyssakayart alyssakayart
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Oct 21, 2014

    When It's Bad, It's Really Bad

    i just have really awful mood swings! haha! especially before.
    mistyeyedlass mistyeyedlass
    18-21, F
    2 Responses May 1, 2009

    my depression is on and of.

    I was fine today. I was actually extremely random and happy, I was posting random questions on EP and I was fine. now all of a sudden im depressed and im crying no reason. no reason at all. some days im fine. some days im not. sometimes im depressed at night for an hour or two...
    EnjoyTheSilenceX EnjoyTheSilenceX
    16-17, F
    1 Response Jan 3, 2015

    I tend to get mad easily.

    As well as cry easily sometimes. I also have days where I feel like life isn't worth living anymore. I don't want pity. This is just the truth and one of the many flaws of myself.
    Philli8807 Philli8807
    26-30, F
    Jun 18, 2014

    Hi everyone, this is my first experience here

    and English is not my main language so sorry for bad English. About 4 days ago I went to see a psychiatrist because lately I was feeling so bad(crying in the bathroom, feeling sad all the time, sometimes angry for no reason, etc), she told me I have depression and apparently...
    Alvaro88 Alvaro88
    26-30, M
    Feb 22, 2015

    I'm me. Who really cares?

    Probably not many.
    t00mmyb00y t00mmyb00y
    26-30, M
    1 Response Oct 24, 2014

    Guys... Any advice? I don't

    even know where to start, I guess it's like most people, feeling worthless... Stupid... I get ups and downs but I have a constant pathetic fear of my boyfriend falling in love with someone else and I just feel ****. I was never like this before in any relationship. I don't...
    KoalaMars KoalaMars
    22-25, F
    May 2, 2015

    I'm just sooo tired of it all.

    I think I have the most capacity for sadness. I'm stuck in mental prison.
    Sewmuch2do Sewmuch2do
    41-45, F
    Jul 29, 2015

    Depression is like a tidal wave

    that washed up too fast and now I'm drowning in my own misery. It's so alive it feels like it should be solid thing that rests in my mind, that has a face to show. I'm tired of feeling tired. Sick of feeling sick. I wish it'd vanish one night so I could wake up feeling new...
    Rhythemofmyheart Rhythemofmyheart
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 4, 2014

    I Don't Even Know.

    I have dysthimia or what ever it spells like. I am just always depressed a little, I don't often get to have up days but a good "normal" day is not supposed to be all that bad. I don't have information about it I just have meds and am having a bad time finding help. I also...
    XenDragon XenDragon
    31-35, M
    2 Responses Jun 18, 2010

    Depressed For Years

    Not a day goes by without me feeling depressed at least once. Despite my taking 3 medications for it, I have horrable days. (Effexor, Buspar, Adderall are my medications) Phycotherapy, shmycotherapy... Give me money and watch my worries dissipate!
    AnnaLovesCoffee AnnaLovesCoffee
    36-40, F
    1 Response Apr 21, 2009

    The need to attach myself to something

    or someone stems from overwhelming issues. How do you cure something that doesn't clinically manifest itself physically ? I battle demons on a daily basis, some a lost battle, but when I form an attachment, that serves as a barrier, a shield, a distraction, a remedy that keeps...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jun 19, 2015

    Sometimes It Switches From Hour By Hour

    Well, i don't even know where to begin. I've been diagnosed with depression since I was 16. I've actually been diagnosed with other things too, but nobody could really make up their mind of what I have, other than depression. Lately, I've been noticing that I go up and down a lot...
    doglover1984 doglover1984
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Jan 18, 2011

    This Never Seems To Go Away.

    I've had problems with depression and anxiety for years. No medicine seems to work, I'm unhappy and don't know what to do. I have a job, a family..I should be ok, but I'm not. Can't figure it out.
    davedaddykh1 davedaddykh1
    51-55, M
    5 Responses Jan 30, 2012

    I've been beat down my whole life.

    I try to kill myself twice. I was life and self hating. Then I meet my best friend and she told me that I should go talk to my doctor. I got but on my meds and I never been happier I can finally deal with the sadness and stand up for myself I hope one day I won't need my meds...
    jbug232 jbug232
    18-21, F
    3 Responses May 9, 2014

    Right now. Stop isolating.

    Being alone with your negative distorted thoughts is excruciatingly painful for your soul. Find someone and get someone to be with you in this so it can pass. Listen to Pink "the Great escape" If I can make war on my own darkness and stumble towards the light you can too. On...
    MrHeartaFire MrHeartaFire
    41-45, M
    1 Response Jan 25, 2015

    Today has been a bad day.

    Despite my three medications the downside of my depressive bipolar kicked in big time. Spent all day with no desire to do anything, no appetite, extremely irritable, head not straight, concentration zero, ability to talk all over the place - basically speaking garbage or...
    Neondaze Neondaze
    51-55, M
    3 Responses Dec 10, 2014

    Mysterious Ways: A Short Story

    She can hear him screaming blue murder in the back bedroom but she turns up The Pet Shop Boys and makes herself a cup of instant. Is God watching? It is Wednesday. The dustbin men will be coming. She has put out her rubbish; carefully bundled up in black bin liners at the bottom...
    Sighman Sighman
    51-55, M
    May 10, 2012

    one minute I'm saying on thing on impulse the

    next I'm taking it back and being very hypocritical my mind my gut feeling always got me going back on My word and I tend to switch up on everybody like it's a turbulence I unfortunately can't contain. I hate this but I love it because it's who I am.
    Lorissa Lorissa
    22-25, F
    Feb 12, 2015

    I am not too sure if I've recovered from

    depression and gotten normal Or have lost all my feelings.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses May 9, 2014

    Related Experiences

    Anybody that has ever experienced a streak of sadness, doesn't necessarily need to be at a level of "depression", has learned that there are few people that can handle it. It's not...
    kk1874 kk1874
    31-35, F
    Apr 21
    To all who still think about suicide or have a depression. You don't have to be alone. We can be friends and I'll try to make you feel better and see the bright side of things. I...
    soyyoprincesa soyyoprincesa
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 21
    To all who still think about suicide or have a depression. You don't have to be alone. We can be friends and I'll try to make you feel better and see the bright side of things. I...
    soyyoprincesa soyyoprincesa
    22-25, F
    Apr 21
    I wish it was easier to make friends easier to just converse with someone anxiety and depression has taken over my life
    spiritualvirgo82 spiritualvirgo82
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Apr 20
    Hi, my name is *CENSORED* and I am 15. i know right, so young. Anyways, I know what depression feels like. I know what feeling empty and dead feels like. I know what being sad all...
    VanillaMarshmallow VanillaMarshmallow
    13-15, F
    Apr 20
    For as long as I can remember I have struggled with depression, even when everything is going well it feels like there is something dark in my stomach eating away at all the...
    ColdSerpent ColdSerpent
    26-30, M
    1 Response Apr 19
    Once again skipping, sitting in an empty lot, wishing I brought a razor and wanting another dealer. Seems every time I pull this juvenile trick it gets that much harder to commit...
    yamaraj yamaraj
    18-21, M
    Apr 19
    I suffer through depression every day and people say stuff about it all the time not knowing that its a disease. It is and i have been left by people that i loved and many people...
    Rawr2132 Rawr2132
    13-15, F
    Apr 18
    My college documentary class took a trip to take some photos, and we split into small groups. One girl I have gotten to be friends with this semester, the other we are friends with...
    starling156 starling156
    18-21, M
    4 Responses Apr 17
    as the melodramatic header can tell you, I'm riddled with angst and pretentious self hatred. It's been so for running on, i don't know, two years now (give or take(more likely take...
    yamaraj yamaraj
    18-21, M
    2 Responses Apr 17
    Depression and loneliness be damned
    Appleslices69 Appleslices69
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 17
    Since EP is going I don't know how I am going to find another coping mechanism for my depression. I wanted to write about four different stories but I was too shaky, irritated and...
    UnicornsOfHope UnicornsOfHope
    26-30
    3 Responses Apr 17
    today's depression is extremely deep... if some bad guy try to take me to bad places,i might not be able to refuse.. Feeling loneliness in a crowded is awful than feeling it...
    genjiipiexx genjiipiexx
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Apr 17
    My depression is finally going away. I sometimes feel myself clicking in and out of feeling normal. I can finally get out of bed and feel like I have a purpose again. I can...
    pianokat pianokat
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Apr 16
    thanks for being my moodboster
    jevineilonesia jevineilonesia
    13-15, F
    Apr 16
    My depression is getting so much worse.
    rainandbooks rainandbooks
    13-15, F
    5 Responses Apr 15
    Here is a link to an article to share, hope it can help with your anxiety and depression http://themindunleashed.org/2014/09/8-ways-stop-thinking-find-peace.html
    Sunflowerintw Sunflowerintw
    41-45, F
    Apr 14
    I have Depression and anxiety but my family just thinks I'm a freak. I guess you could say I'm the black sheep. They told me crazy and freakish. They tell me I'm stupid and fat...
    XxTimeLordxX XxTimeLordxX
    13-15, F
    6 Responses Apr 14
More Stories