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I Battle Self Injury

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 201 People

    I am so broken mentally

    and physically. I don't want to live like this I don't want to deal with this anymore. I have many scars from just trying to stay alive and feel something. The cuts are getting deeper and more frequent. I can't stop
    alanabean alanabean 16-17, F 2 Responses May 26

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    My Story

    When I was twelve years old, I had no friends, no home, no father and no sense of security, self esteem or self image. In school, I was either alone, embarrassing myself, or being incessantly asked if 'I'm emo', 'I cut myself' or to show people my wrists. Eventually, I wasn't...
    ShyannJagger ShyannJagger 13-15 Apr 22, 2011

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    The Endorphins

    "She cuts herself, never too deep, never enough to die. But enough to feel the pain, Enough to feel the screams on the inside." It's a never ending vicious cycle. A constant thought in the back of your head. I love watching the blood run down my arms/legs/ wherever I decide to...
    BulletproofLoneliness BulletproofLoneliness 16-17, F Nov 21, 2013

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    Imagine. What If There Were A Way .....

    Imagine. What if there were a way? What if there were a way that you could get rid of all that emotional pain from your past? What if you could just pack it all up, put it in a bag and take it out to the curb and be done with it all? What if those painful memories weren't...
    newhopehealth newhopehealth 46-50, M 8 Responses Jun 11, 2010

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    The Long Road

    I have been suffering from self injury for nearly eight years. I have gone a year at most with out doing it, It had been six months this last time and I really thought I was beating it. I slipped up three nights in a row and not in just a little way so now I am back at the cross...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Sep 6, 2010

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    They Don't Get It

    how could they get it? they wouldn't understand, the relief that i get, from the knife held in my hand. but the relief is cut short, until it hurts to much, then it's back to the knife. when they ask me how i am, i always say i'm fine, i just hide my pain, behind these fake...
    irishlady98 irishlady98 16-17, F Aug 5, 2013

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    Battling Self Injury For Years...

    I think I am an indigo person. I have always been extremely sensitive, one of my early consistent memories is that of sitting on my fathers lap, crying over what I have no clue now, and listening to my dad say "you are to sensitive". It made me feel  very defensive, because I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses May 14, 2011

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    Stupid Old Woman

    When I was in my early teens, I was a cutter. At that time, there had been nothing talked about on that subject. Later I was startled to learn that I was not some freak of nature. I no longer cut but, instead, beat myself in the face. The relief I feel is....I don't know how...
    beevs beevs 61-65, F Oct 3, 2012

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    Idk

    I have battled SI for years now on and off. I can't seem to stop for good. And to be honest I don't think I want to. I don't think I can cope with my life's circumstances without it. I don't think that people who haven't ever tried it can tell me not to do it, because honestly...
    bandgeek1022 bandgeek1022 16-17, F Oct 13, 2009

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    I Take A Beating.

    I am 23 now and since i was about 10 i've been self-injuring myself. When i was little i remember getting angry or upset or bored and just smashing my head into the wall till it bled. I didn't think of it as injury then, it was just something that i assumed everyone did. I mostly...
    Underthenoise Underthenoise 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 23, 2012

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    Anyone Else?

    Does anyone else harm themselves by swallowing inanimate objects? It is one of the many forms of self-injury I have adapted over the years. Right now I am just dwelling on it because I am super anxious and triggered,a nd I know if I swallow certain things they will put me under...
    Androgosane Androgosane 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 5, 2013

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    My Twisted, Broken Story.

    Okay, my life isn't easy. Never has been, but of recent late I've been on a downward spiral. I guess I'll start at the beginning. My father has been out of my life since I was 4, and that doesn't bother me. What bothered me was the way people treated me when they knew. It wasn't...
    KateSmurfy KateSmurfy 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 13, 2012

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    I Am Trying...

    i have been burning and cutting since the beginning of this year... the burning got worse than the cutting though... i started using my straightner to burn my fingers and hands until i had massive welts on them... but a teacher and friend found out... and he told me i need to...
    tryingtostaystrong tryingtostaystrong 16-17 2 Responses Apr 16, 2011

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    Life Really Isnt That Easy

    My mother takes my littlie weapons away hoping to save me, my boyfriend screams at me to stop but how can i with the horrible things that go on in my life! No one understands what i go throough because if they did they wouldnt yell and scream at me. They wouldnt pretend that...
    Annabellassecrets Annabellassecrets 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 5, 2012

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    Ughhhh

    i SI for 5 years now and im not ganna stop
    marley19 marley19 13-15, F Aug 30, 2009

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    My self harm is getting really out of control.

    I've been cutting at least twice a day sometimes four or five times a day. I'm starting to scare myself as thoughts of suicide are more frequent too. I can't control it anymore.
    alanabean alanabean 16-17, F 1 Response May 2

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    Hm...

    i started cutting in college.... i've battled depression pretty much all my life and i have anxiety issues which lead to why i've done it... i've been clean for about 4+ months now but it's a struggle : / i had a huge urge to cut today...fmlll
    secondstarontheleft secondstarontheleft 22-25, F Oct 27, 2012

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    I'm drowning in a pool of my own blood

    and tears. It seems that cutting is the only thing I have left that can make me feel anything at all. Nothing else works anymore, the only reason I'm still alive is because of cutting. But I can feel it slowly losing its magic. I'm becoming immune to it just like I have with...
    mmccarth mmccarth 18-21, F Dec 14, 2013

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    Every Day Is A Battle

    I battle self-injury every single day. The minute anything in my life is overwhelming, that is the first place I want to turn. I just found out I failed a class today and I'm in jeopardy of not getting into the nursing program at my school. Nursing is the only thing I want to...
    sarahmayy sarahmayy 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 9, 2010

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    Facebook Page: Self Harm Information

      Just wanted to let people know that I created a facebook page called Self Harm Information, and i'm updating it with links to information and videos about self injury and recovery, and other inspirational stuff. Anyway like it if you are interested :)
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 18, 2012

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    Poem - Bladed Injury

    Dear Bladed Injury, I miss you so. I miss your sharp edge, the almost euphoric rush, and the crimson dripping from the line on my body. You are my relief, -my soul mate! Being so far from you is mental torture, It is like my brain is on fire, and only your sharp, bladed edge can...
    carriewolf12 carriewolf12 22-25, T Dec 28, 2012

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    The Pain That Heals The Pain.

    I have been battling self injury since I was 11 years old. I started off by cutting myself. I would tear apart razors just to get the sharpest blade. I am now 17 and haven't cut now for about 3 weeks. I don't only cut, I have burned myself and I have also purposely sprained or...
    ashnicqua ashnicqua 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 7, 2012

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    Idk

    I have battled SI for years now on and off. I can't seem to stop for good. And to be honest I don't think I want to. I don't think I can cope with my life's circumstances without it. I don't think that people who haven't ever tried it can tell me not to do it, because honestly...
    bandgeek1022 bandgeek1022 16-17, F Oct 13, 2009

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    Stranger

    I lay in bed let the tears flow silently whispering at the urge to cut "please go" but the voice in my head says its better than the emotional pain and a small part of me asks what i have to gain but none of that matters once i give in and finally let that stupid...
    CrazyChicky123 CrazyChicky123 13-15, F 2 Responses Mar 5, 2010

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    I am here, I am her

    for you... If you need to talk I will listen all night. You want to run away and hide in your room, I will hide with you, you want some distance ill sit at the other end of the room. When you need to be held ill be right there beside you holding you tight. You need a drink ill...
    bolahaming bolahaming 18-21, M 6 days ago

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    Almost A Year Now.

    I really miss cutting and burning. It's something that has been very difficult for me to walk away from. In a way, it was always some screwed up form of therapy for me, almost like a drug... a comfort. I used to take bobby pins, metal nail files, or razor blades and heat them...
    OblitusAuri OblitusAuri 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 26, 2012

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    I've been cutting since I was about twelve.

    There have been so many people in my life who have tried to help but they give up on me. I feel bad that I can never go more than a couple weeks without cutting. It's been about 2 weeks since I've picked up a blade and I feel so tempted to right now.
    hxlxnb hxlxnb 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 17

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    Never Lose Hope

    I struggled with cutting from ages 12-25. I was not until I really began to deal with the childhood abuse that happened....and that basically I tried to forget. Hurting myself was my way out. It helped the memories, flashbacks, shame and guilt. When I cut it all felt like it...
    Hope4Cutting Hope4Cutting 31-35 1 Response Mar 28, 2012

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    Havent Done It Since 2009

    i used to self harm and people think its to get attention, its not, some people do it for attention and dont have any real problems but they are just ******* scum bags. I havent self harmed for a while because i realised it doesnt convert pain or make you feel better in any way...
    oligasdoi oligasdoi 18-21, M 1 Response Sep 6, 2013

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    I have this on going battle of self injury,

    every time I feel upset I immediately think of the blade. I have scars on my wrist and I want to stop yet I don't want to at the same time, any advice?
    ScaryTale ScaryTale 16-17, F Apr 20

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    In The Past

    Thankfully I have kicked the want and (psychological) need to self harm. Haven't done it in about 2 years :) Though When I was younger, around 15-18 years old, I used to do it a lot. So much so that sometimes It would be hard to walk. I always hid the injuries though, it was...
    mistakenstrangers mistakenstrangers 22-25, M 4 Responses Mar 9, 2011

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    Recovering At The Moment.

    Ah, good ol' self injury..... It sucks. Big time.  I started when I was 15. I saw a TV show where one the the characters was doing it and I thought, "Hmm, maybe that'll help with what i'm feeling!"It did for a while, But it just made me feel worse. Never going swimming because I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 13, 2011

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    How I Survived....even When I Didn't Want To Live;;

    My name is Hannah(:  I remember the first time I cut was in 8th grade.  My friend Torie told me about how she cut herself to make herself feel better and after school that same day, for no reason at all I cut my wrist (Not deep at all).  I was perfectly happy that...
    Hadams12 Hadams12 13-15, F 1 Response Feb 5, 2010

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    Please Help Researchers Understand Self-harm

    Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)! Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm? We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! Participating in...
    PERL2009 PERL2009 18-21 Feb 4, 2010

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    It has been 2 whole months

    since I did self harm. 😄 I can honestly say I haven't felt this good about myself in a long time! ❤️
    Eamsinkler97 Eamsinkler97 16-17, F May 4

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    Ever since I started dating my boyfriend I

    haven't cut. He keeps me grounded. :)
    Innocentangel69 Innocentangel69 13-15, F Dec 14, 2013

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    I Can'T Stop

    I've battled cutting since the end of August. I can't seem to stop. It's like I'm addicted to it. All my legs are cut up and some are beginning to heal and scar. It still hasn't clicked in my head how messed up my legs are going to look. I can't find a way to express my emotions...
    Lo24 Lo24 22-25, F Sep 14, 2013

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    Scars Completed

    When people see my scars they assume who I am and what I've been through. The truth is nobody will ever know me completely, not even you. The most important person in my life will never understand who bad it hurts when he looks at my arms and kisses my scars. I have almost no...
    Deweybird0016 Deweybird0016 16-17, F Nov 25, 2012

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    I Like The Pain

    For as long as I can remember I have always used self harm to cope, especially when I'm stressed. Even when I was really little i'd scratch or hit myself. I could probably write a list a mile long of different ways to self harm- and those would just be the ways I have. There are...
    sparkles9513 sparkles9513 16-17, F Mar 23, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    Have you cut or deliberately injured yourself in the past year? We invite you to share your experience by participating in a quick online study to learn more about people’s...
    uwyoresearcher uwyoresearcher 22-25, F a week ago

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    Today is an epic day. It has been 100 days since I last self harmed. Sure there are days where all I want to do is carve my body but I don't because I have a great support system...
    haileemattis haileemattis 16-17, F 3 Responses Jul 30

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    I was always the happy girl The one that cheered everybody up But behind my smile is a diffrent story One ive never told before I told my bestfriend She told the whole school...
    katysecret123 katysecret123 16-17, F Aug 1

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    Before reading this, please go read my other experience project from being a compulsive liar. This isn't the main key of my self hatred but I can understand it being the main key...
    Binkyboo12 Binkyboo12 22-25 1 Response Aug 5

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    New levels of self loathing will be reached before the end of the night🔪
    nohopekid nohopekid 18-21, M 6 days ago

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    I am super triggered right now. Guess it's my fault though. I'll feel better soon but yeah. People hitting on me and asking sexual questions is really triggering.
    feralady feralady 18-21, F Jul 30

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    I need a co-writer for a realistic drama novel about a woman in prison. Please help me.
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M Aug 6

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    PLEASE BE MY CO-WRITER FOR A REALISTIC DRAMA NOVEL ABOUT A WOMAN IN PRISON!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 6

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    PLEASE BE MY CO-WRITER FOR A REALISTIC DRAMA NOVEL ABOUT A WOMAN IN PRISON!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M Aug 9

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    It's been a long time since I've cut & my scars are slowwlyyyy fading :/
    averylynnx averylynnx 18-21, F Aug 10

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    At first I hid the scars with bracelets and etc but then I noticed that no one notices anyway. I have clear scars on my wrists but it's been half a year I walk around in T-shirts...
    Sakura09girl Sakura09girl 13-15, F 4 Responses Aug 13

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    It's been 7 months since I've cut
    averylynnx averylynnx 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 15

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