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I Believe Intimacy Is Not Purely Sexual

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,454 People

    It's about holding her,

    looking into her eyes, kissing her mouth, and then her nose, pretending you missed. Sliding your hands down her back as she stands before you, over her perfect body, though she doubts it's any more than 100% flawed. It's about closing your eyes, and opening them slowly, not...
    GreenManley GreenManley 18-21, M 2 Responses Dec 14, 2014

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    Actually I believe intimacy is not sexual at

    all. I have been sexual with people with no intimacy what so ever. Conversely, I have been intensely intimate with people, actually far fewer people, and have never had sexual contact with them. Finding someone to have that level of trust, openness, and sharing with is amazing.
    jfar123 jfar123 41-45, M 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Intimacy Is Trust

    Intimacy is a closeness, a revelation, a trust. Hence the term "intimacy" and the separated term "sexual intimacy". I'd even dare to say I have shared more intimacy in certain non-sexual situations compared to some sexual situations. It's a deep knowing and a connection that goes...
    BebeKitten BebeKitten 26-30, F 7 Responses Aug 29, 2013

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    I truly believe that holding hands is the most

    intimate thing you can do. You will kiss a one night stand, you will sleep with a one night stand but unless their is a connection, you won't hold hands with a one night stand
    Tealonly Tealonly 22-25, F 5 Responses Sep 2, 2014

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    When your with the one you love.

    Sex is the last thing on your mind. Being with them is enough, you don't need sex. Hugging them, kissing them, cuddling, spooning. These are all very intimate things and you'd hands down want to do any of these things over sex. Sex is great, but any form of intimacy is great too...
    deathsdestruction deathsdestruction 16-17, M 3 Responses Oct 23, 2014

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    True intimacy is a circle,

    it starts in the mind, goes to the genitals and comes back to the mind. Or starts in the genitals and goes the other way around.
    Danceofhours Danceofhours 41-45, M 2 Responses Oct 17, 2014

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    "We ache to touch intimately what is real,

    to find the marriage of meaning and matter in our lives and in the world. We ache to feel and express the fire of being fully alive. When we cultivate and refuse to separate those essential expressions of a human soul-our spirituality, sexuality, and creativity-we feed the...
    lovelife135 lovelife135 41-45, F 4 Responses May 10, 2014

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    Amazing sex stays with you.

    It soaks into your skin. It floats through your dreams and has you silently smoldering with delicious remembrances for hours after. It has you craving it days later. And it has you aching for it if you don’t get it for awhile.
    lovelife135 lovelife135 41-45, F 8 Responses May 20, 2014

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    It's beautiful when you find someone

    that is in love with your mind. Someone who wants to undress your conscience and make love to your thoughts. Someone that wants to watch you slowly take down all of your walls you've built up around you're mind and let them inside.
    Sirwithherkey Sirwithherkey 31-35, M 2 Responses Dec 1, 2014

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    Ohhh the brain plays greater part in

    even in sexuality much less in intimacy !!
    anasteel2 anasteel2 41-45, F 1 Response Oct 16, 2014

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    If all I had with my husband was sexual

    intimacy, I do not believe we'd still be happily married after 20 years. Although sex is great it's the emotional intimacy that binds people together and keeps them hopeful and strong. My husband is not a counselor but he has an almost counselor-type energy about him (in college...
    lauren71 lauren71 41-45, F 4 Responses Apr 26, 2014

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    Intimacy is not purely physical; it's the act

    of connecting with someone so deeply, you feel you can see into their soul. These aren't my words, but I certainly agree with them.
    Robin10 Robin10 46-50, F 4 Responses Jun 14, 2014

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    Listen stupid pervs. No one wants to see your

    nasty selfies of you man parts. Girls minds do not work like men's, girls are not enjoying random pics like that unless you are sending them to 1. The std **** queen 2. A prostitute 3. Some crazy sexually abused and totally confused girl. Or 4. A "woman" who's smuggling a...
    ellielovesyou ellielovesyou 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 26, 2014

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    True Intimacy!

    How true the title of this group is! I've always seen a partner as being someone there for you, that cheers you up, that you cuddle up and watch films with. That's what intimacy is to me. And times when I've told girls that I'd like to be intimate with them, or have some time...
    nordicabduction nordicabduction 18-21, M 4 Responses Sep 5, 2013

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    When youhave been with someone

    and talked, discussed, shared, and have been totally open and truthful with each other, even over coffee in a coffee shop, no sexual gratification is predominantly in sight. Brains can have total intimatcy without sex.
    Thesoutherner Thesoutherner 66-70, M 2 Responses Sep 15, 2014

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    I had an ex boyfriend

    who was all about sex and nothing more. He sweet talked me into the relationship, and since it was my first one i fell for his games. He was nice at first, bought me nice things, and even gave me his credit card, but he ALWAYS wanted sex. Sometimes i would be sleeping and i...
    Lauraluvsyou Lauraluvsyou 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 2

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    Sex: It’s amazing how you can feel a

    difference, during sex, between someone who just came out of a relationship and someone who has been single for a while. Its in the way they look at you, as if there’s someone else behind your eyes. Its in the way they kiss you, their lips so used to be molded to someone else...
    SrColins SrColins 41-45, M 14 Responses Nov 15, 2014

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    Intimacy. You think of sex.

    But I believe that intimacy is something that two people have. Being naked, but not in taking your clothes off but in the way that their soul is naked. They know each other, their hopes, dreams, everything. That's intimacy to me.
    EmiTru EmiTru 18-21, F 10 Responses Feb 2, 2014

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    Intimacy is definitely more

    than being sexually intimate. It is about that emotional connection, baring your soul down to the very core of your being and having someone that totally gets you and accepts you as you are and they can do the same with you. A connection that runs deep and it's a connection...
    greeneyedlady72 greeneyedlady72 41-45, F 18 Responses Jun 19, 2014

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    What could be more intimate

    than the pure joy of just holding the hand of some-one you love and feeling their fingers holding onto yours. To see the the crinkle lines around their eyes when they smile at you. To smell their hair as you hold them tight.
    bill1960 bill1960 51-55, M 6 Responses Dec 28, 2014

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    I'm a demisexual. half asexual.

    I'm pretty sure a lot of us feel that way. intimacy and affection don't mean sex. I can be affectionate with my cat, my friend, my nephew. we can cuddle and hug, and hold hands and give kisses but nothing is sex. sex is sex. I can have a deep intimate conversation with someone...
    khirh khirh 22-25, M Nov 24, 2014

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    I fooled around with my opposite sex best

    friend, an I've never fooled around with anyone before. I wasn't planning on it, even though there's always been tension. We were drinking a little first, which would explain all my confidence. But now I only remember it all fuzzy like a dream, which scared me. I'm tempted to do...
    cocoagirl95 cocoagirl95 18-21, F 5 Responses Nov 18, 2014

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    It’s not just about sex.

    Don’t get me wrong. Sex is ******* great, but when you have a connection with someone, when you feel so strong for someone, just a kiss is enough to make your knees weak. You just can’t beat that.
    smeckledorfed smeckledorfed 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 17

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    One thing I do know about intimacy is

    that there are certain natural laws which govern the sexual experience of two people, and that these laws cannot be budged any more than gravity can be negotiated with. To feel physically comfortable with someone else's body is not a decision you can make. It has very little...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F 5 Responses Jan 20

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    It's not, I read a book

    that said it isn't and I believe it.
    Letmebepatient Letmebepatient 31-35, M 3 Responses Jan 8

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    For a few moments this afternoon I spent time

    being a voyeur. From my poolside deck chair I observed the interaction between mother, father and the young boy in the hotel pool. The parents time with the child was shared equally and with love. They were proud parents and obviously in love. If I was observing more casually, I...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 4 Responses Mar 19, 2014

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    Being Vulnerable

    I’m not much of a touchy feely person and I have this thing about personal space.  When strangers want to hug me, I get quite uncomfortable. So, sometimes intimacy is challenging for me.  Yet, I crave it.   Being intimate means showing your vulnerabilities. I’ve...
    deleted deleted 26-30 19 Responses May 12, 2012

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    Intimacy is that closeness

    when your souls intertwine, when you look into your partners eyes and know how they feel and what their next words are going to be....that touch that makes everything better and that hug that makes you feel safe....no it's not sexual but when you have all the above, believe me...
    lemolemo lemolemo 41-45, F 7 Responses Jul 15, 2014

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    I just love glancing across the room

    and catching his eye. Seeing that look in him, that smile. Knowing we just shared a sweet moment together for just a bit until I had to look away.
    TheNerdYouLove TheNerdYouLove 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 13, 2014

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    Intimacy is much more

    than sex. Sex is a basic urge. Sex with someone you really love and care for is the best!
    mslvr01 mslvr01 46-50, M 1 Response Dec 5, 2014

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    Is it weird that i just prefer making out with

    people and snuggling more then sex and touching? Or am i weird
    cutiepatootie96 cutiepatootie96 18-21, F 6 Responses Apr 6, 2014

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    Intimacy for me starts in my mind.

    As I feel a connection to a person and am drawn to them, I feel the barriers dissolve and a true connection is formed. And as that bond develops, I feel like I can become more vulnerable to that person and share what is truly in my heart and mind. It is an intimacy that can...
    bunnigirl bunnigirl 46-50, F 2 Responses Oct 16, 2014

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    If there is any doubt about this concept,

    contemplate the idea of your loved one taking a long walk on a beach with a beautiful/handsome member of the opposite sex, maybe a picnic, even going to see a rom-com in a crowded theater. Imagine him/her listening and laughing and maintaining eye contact with that person and...
    iLikeWhereUrHeadsAt iLikeWhereUrHeadsAt 36-40, M 2 Responses Oct 28, 2014

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    It's the closeness of knowing

    that the things you care most for are reciprocated, and some of the gaps you feel most harshly have been filled. It's growing, half-alone, but entwined, from a fundamental alikeness hidden deep under the earth, out into the sunshine. It's the comfort of sameness and the...
    Brangwen Brangwen 36-40, F 5 Responses Mar 21, 2014

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    I feel most intimate with my bf

    when we are just sitting in silence.. Our hands together and smiling at each other.. No words between us just enjoying each other's presence.. Sex is physical intimacy, it's important to have other kinda of love to make that sex even more meaningful and pleasurable
    Lucy185 Lucy185 26-30, F 4 Responses Apr 24, 2014

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    "Intimacy is the feeling we get

    when we mutually open our minds and hearts in total acceptance of each other to truly hear what the other is saying and feel what the other is feeling. It is the sense of human connection at the level of the soul." - susan jeffers, ph.d.
    sunnywinter sunnywinter 41-45, F 2 Responses Nov 16, 2014

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    I have fantasies about being

    so intimate with someone that we can just lay down somewhere (like outside) and hold hands and just enjoy being, enjoy breathing next to one another. Perhaps watch a movie and the guy's head laying on my lap while I gentle run my hands through his hair, maybe rub his earlobe a...
    OhGK OhGK 26-30, F 8 Responses Sep 13, 2014

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    You have to stimulate me mentally

    and emotionally before you do physically otherwise I might as well be doing the dishes.
    OhGK OhGK 26-30, F 8 Responses Sep 23, 2014

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    So this past Sunday I watched this gentleman

    perform a dance while painting. He was Cuban and had lots of Cuban music playing along with poetry and other meaningful things playing in the back ground. The was he danced, to me, seemed to be almost seductive. He was very graceful at times, swaying his hips and groin in a...
    OhGK OhGK 26-30, F 3 Responses Sep 22, 2014

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    I know this because my gf was kind enough to

    hold my hair while I puked my guts out from getting drunk.
    pattycake90 pattycake90 22-25, F 2 Responses May 19, 2014

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    We can all agree that sex is an important part

    of the intimacy, but thank goodness is not everything!!! The trust, respect, the sharing thoughts,dreams & secrets and love comes in hand too. The hugs, the kisses, caressing, enjoying the warmth of that someone, when you feel their heartbeat, the goosebumps, the smell of their...
    newlifejuliana newlifejuliana 31-35, F 11 Responses Apr 9, 2014

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    When it comes to intimacy sex is great dont get

    me wrong. But intimacy isnt all about sex. One of my favorite intimate things is when we are in bed & you hold me, my face buried in your chest as we fall asleep. While sex does bring us closer together. I feel like little moments like us just cuddling bring us closer as well...
    janaeannette janaeannette 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 17, 2014

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    I had an a-ha moment

    while watching Gotham. Bruce was looking all over for Selena just to give her a gift, to make her smile. Ahh how pure n giving that love is~ Xxx Reminds me of how things should be.~~~
    Kletsgo Kletsgo 26-30, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I truly believe saying you're intimate with

    someone because you had sex is kinda like saying you're a cowboy because you visited a ranch.
    FryyM FryyM 22-25, M 4 Responses Nov 21, 2014

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    What's The Difference Between Sex And Intimacy?

    My concept of intimacy is a closeness, an emotional bond, a true knowing of one another, a deep friendship that involves openness and vulnerability. This need not at all be sexual. In fact, the people that I am most intimate with are in my extended family. Unfortunately...
    Friendlybabe Friendlybabe 31-35, F 5 Responses May 21, 2010

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    Easy enough to have sex without intimacy.

    ..people do it all the time. Sex is physical. Intimacy is emotional. When the two meet it is the best of both worlds but certainly you can have either one without the other.
    TKD1 TKD1 46-50, F 5 Responses Apr 1, 2014

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    Being able to share deep thoughts is intimate.

    Being able to trust is intimate. Being able to communicate through physical expression is very intimate. Have you ever had someone in your life who knows where your mind is just by reading your eyes? This is the difference between a basic relationship and a true love to me. In...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Nov 15, 2014

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    Lollipopcandykisses Lollipopcandykisses 31-35, F 11 Responses Nov 16, 2014

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    Younger women dating older men mainly

    because younger women are attracted older men. older men mature, confident, stable .Mature guys always know how to treat their women.These younger women are looking for their age gap love romance.For older men, Younger women older men relationships will surely make an older man...
    carry11 carry11 26-30, F Dec 22, 2014

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    it's that feeling of sharing yourself

    and opening yourself up to be read and studied. ..it's scary being so vulnerable but exciting that you are allowing yourself to be that way putting your trust in someone who is willing to do the same thing for you.
    jbm1984 jbm1984 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 18, 2014

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    Saw this loved it !!!

    ! Wanted to share it
    Jusjellybean Jusjellybean 18-21, F 6 Responses Dec 26, 2014

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