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I Can't Find Love Until I Love Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 247 People

    Give So Much, Get Nothing Back

    I hate myself so much it hurts. I try to love myself, but I feel like I am unworthy. When someone comes into my life, I love them too much. I cling to them and they lift my spirit to the point where I am finally OK and I can start loving myself. Then they leave me and I fall...
    Lotte11 Lotte11 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 17, 2011

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    burwi333 burwi333 36-40, M Oct 24, 2010

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    A Lesson Learned!

    I took me a very LONG time to learn this! I didn't love myself, when my horrible exes came across my paths. I was looking for others to love me first, before I could love myself. That thinking was "bass ackwards"! And that's why, I think, my exes were such horrible...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 18, 2009

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    A Bittersweet Cliché

                      "A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror." - Ken Keyes            At one point I loathed such words. I interpreted it as being ignorant and looking through rose...
    Marowit Marowit 22-25, F Oct 12, 2013

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    Learn To Love Yourself - Try This - Make Lists Of Reasons Why You Are Wonderful

    Make a list of wonderful things about yourself. this is certainly not my original idea. All you "Secret" readers will know that right away. Why not? You are alive, you are here and have not given up, so make your list. I am wonderful because (doubt I can list hundreds of...
    doejohn2043 doejohn2043 66-70 3 Responses Jan 20, 2012

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    burwi333 burwi333 36-40, M Oct 24, 2010

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    Goodness Gracious This Sucks....

    basically I liked this guy. Im not allowed to 'like' yet. i gotta learn to deal with my **** first. normally this would be no problem exepect i had the rare oppertunity in which this guy actually liked me back. problem: we live 20ft apart in our dorm. Im a art geek, fantasy...
    abittobright abittobright 18-21, F Oct 28, 2013

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    How Can I Love Someone When I Can'T Love Myself

    Ok your probally going to say I'm too young to say this but I don't believe in love right now guys I date want me to say I love them but I don't I don't even love myself well enough to love them and they think I'm trying to hurt but that's not the case love isn't a 3 week...
    Shayalex Shayalex 18-21 Feb 25, 2013

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    It's Just So Hard

    I know in my heart that this is the truth. I can't expect anyone to love me if I don't love myself first. But it's so incredibly hard for me to love myself. I've never really accepted that I am the way I am and I need to be happy and love myself for that. I don't really have much...
    earth2bella earth2bella 22-25, F Jan 26, 2008

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    burwi333 burwi333 36-40, M Oct 24, 2010

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    Being

     Being... It is the letting go of all the should's, the must's, the have-to's, the have-nots, the cannots, the doubts and the guilt. > It is allowing your thoughts to come forth - without judgement. > It is allowing yourself to feel - without judgement. > It is...
    burwi333 burwi333 36-40, M 5 Responses Oct 25, 2010

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    Mwah!

    And I think I'm finally on my way to loving myself!! Thank God!!
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 18, 2011

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    I Thought I Did...

    I can't possibly truly love him because I don't have enough enough love for myself and that is my true problem. My New Year's Resolution is to have more love for myself.
    Val3ntine Val3ntine 18-21, F Dec 31, 2010

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    I Feel Like a Failure

    I feel like such a failure. I can never accomplish my one and only goal. I want to loose weight. I want to gain self confidence, which is at level zero. I have tried to diet countless times. Its so emberrising and so huniliateing that I cant do this one things. I cant talk about...
    tryingtofindwhoiam tryingtofindwhoiam 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 19, 2009

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    I Just Realized This...

    For so long I have been searching for answers on why am I like this. I have been in several relationship but not one turn out to be good or happy. Of course I want to be loved and I want to love someone. But, I can't seem to truly fall in love with someone and that...
    amethyst91 amethyst91 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 9, 2010

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    I Think...

    That's the most difficult truth I've had to accept. The problem is, I don't think I can love myself until someone loved me... I need proof that I am lovable... Of course then I realize it doesn't work that way... I don't think I could ever love myself 100% though. Therein lies...
    drcynic drcynic 26-30, M 2 Responses Nov 30, 2007

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    Related Experiences

    Why not? What good are tokens if you can't use them? I have 30 tokens, and can't add any photos. EP sucks sometimes.
    craverandscarlett craverandscarlett 66-70, M 1 hr ago

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    I don't have a clue where to start this but I will say thank you to anyone who finds the time to read this. The thoughts and memories that are in my head make me think this will...
    Valtboy Valtboy 31-35, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I thought I had it all worked out. Everything seems to go great. Yet I can't sleep at night. I feel so bad. I've dealt with depression before and I thought that I had moved past it...
    canudos canudos 22-25, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Well, it's another sleepless night for me, I can't sleep... So, it's just me and a pack of DuMaurier cigarettes tonight. I'll just smoke 🚬 myself to death tonight in hopes...
    sunshineh13 sunshineh13 22-25, F 2 days ago

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    I am in love with my best guy friend who claims he is straight, I can't give up on my love for him, and I feel like if I get close enough, he will see he loves me too. All I can do...
    olone olone 18-21, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    My entire life I've been known as the 'doormat' - the one that everyone can happily take advantage of. And the worst part is: I let it slide. I forgive them, even when I really...
    Tinkiez Tinkiez 22-25, F 3 days ago

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    if I don't say the words. it doesn't mean that they are not there. I just want them to land with you the way that I intend for them to. I am sorry that I often say them like two...
    bigheartsmallworld bigheartsmallworld 36-40, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    This is my dilema and the most obvious is that it is NOT a dilema but the feelings I have makes everything feel so wrong. I in a sense do know the person I am inlove with, but I...
    LoveUnite LoveUnite 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    Well actually that's not true I tend to express myself openly. I am very upset with my mother. She considers us stating the fact that we very much want to go to school us arguing...
    blahblahblahxoxo blahblahblahxoxo 18-21, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I can never say I've been truly happy...ever...I've known this since I was a kid...I've had happy times but I have never been happy for a week straight with no complaints.I use to...
    Gottawannaneedtotalk Gottawannaneedtotalk 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    i honestly don't know what to believe anymore, i don't know the difference between lies and reality.
    hollaeveryone hollaeveryone 13-15, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    It's one of those bad nights. I can't go to sleep, I'm tired but not tired enough to fall asleep. Insomnia, mixed with horrific nightmares that happen if I fall asleep when I'm not...
    existJenna existJenna 13-15, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Being able to afford it... This is really the number one reason a lot of people don't travel. But it's worth it if you can save up and make a few trips. Go with people you enjoy...
    INFJguytwin1 INFJguytwin1 22-25, M a week ago

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    The the thing with boyfriends' mothers. Oh my God they are so irritating. I'm tired of being lectured. I'm quiet and not a back talker and just nod and says yes or no, and say a...
    reginarose reginarose 26-30, F Aug 24

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    Why do I keep doing this to myself? I get attached emotionally too easy, then they don't love me back because they are too old for me. I am honest and not 'just another teenager...
    Myparentsfml Myparentsfml 16-17, F Aug 24

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    I was just a small 6th grade kid who had terrible self-esteem issues. It comes with the territory when your father used to terrify you, when he would beat you for the most trivial...
    S1NK1LL3R S1NK1LL3R 22-25, M Aug 23

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    I am in love,with someone I cant have. it took me months to just even recognize the feelings, how can I love somebody I never thought I would even like? a complete opposite to what...
    bujji14 bujji14 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 22

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    I really want to kill myself. My life is going on horribly. My mother has psychotic depression, she has been on an affair for 9 years & has just recently stopped after being...
    mangoseed mangoseed 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 22

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    I try my best to keep things at peace. As much as possible, I want everyone happy. I adjust to everyone's needs. I often put their needs before mine. But there are some instances...
    ayamesan16 ayamesan16 22-25, F Aug 22

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    I certainly hope you find this to be a helpful tip. There is no reason why anyone should be saying, "I love to travel but I can't afford it, unless they want to pay full price for...
    Evabeth Evabeth 26-30, F Aug 21

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    Okay... Im going to let it all out... Hope yall care enough to comment.. Sorry if this is all over the place.. Im just thinking so much about my life right now.. I met this...
    SkinnyIsPretty0 SkinnyIsPretty0 18-21, F Aug 20

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    We shouldn’t be together. Culturally, we are so diverse. Age, we are a decade apart. Location, across the world from one another. Relationship, too complicated to explain. But...
    MyHeart4You MyHeart4You 46-50, F Aug 20

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    I don't understand why I can't sleep at night. How can I make myself sleep?
    Becky555 Becky555 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 20

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    Everyday I face a new wave of challenges that drag me down where I can then be met with returning currents that bring back old insecurities and weaknesses. I like to think that I'm...
    pressurecooker pressurecooker 16-17, F Aug 20

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    Honestly, I think my body just hates me. Or something is broken with it because no matter how tired I am, if I go to bed before 3-4 am I can't sleep!! I physically can't. I mean, I...
    GoldenHeart69 GoldenHeart69 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 19

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    well I picked this one ironically because I went through a terrible time after my car accident in2003..it's funny how life works cuz I was a popular kid,teenager plAyed three...
    damonandrew damonandrew 36-40, M 2 Responses Aug 19

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