I Can't Have Children

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 351 People

    So I have a question

    that all of you may be able to help me with. I am 28 years old, actually turning 29 this weekend! Anyways, I have pre menopause which means I cannot have children. Of course, like many of you here I am devastated and upset but I would like to think that emotionally I've come to...
    curiousviolinist curiousviolinist
    31-35, F
    Jan 20, 2015

    Who Knew...

    I was 16 years old when I got pregnant (2009). I was scared and ashamed. I didn't want to tell my parent. I didn't tell my parents. I hid my pregnancy for 9 months. I went to school like normal. I could hear people whisper about me, but I didn't care. I told myself I'm not...
    Luzaan Luzaan
    1 Response Jul 26, 2013

    No One To Talk To.

    I'm 18 years old, and a few months ago I was told (after years of irregularities) that there would be little chance of conception. I had never really thought much of having children before because I'm so young, but now it's all that I can think about. I have ridiculous jealousy...
    shannon0495 shannon0495
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Sep 20, 2013

    A Life Without Children

    A year ago I was told I could not have children. I remember sitting in my specialist's office, my husband beside me, I was so disappointed. I had gone through the process of IVF in the year leading up to this moment. In a way I kind of had a gut feeling that the news...
    neopup73 neopup73
    36-40, F
    7 Responses Apr 6, 2010

    I found out after rounds

    and rounds of Clomid that I have low ovarian reserve and my only chance of having a child is through egg donor. My husband and I decided we refuse to spend an obscene amount of money on trying to conceive and opt for adoption in a few years. This whole experience left such a...
    CrystalShip1208 CrystalShip1208
    31-35, F
    Nov 17, 2015

    Born Without Ovaries - Ivf And Donor Egg My Only Option.....

    When I was around 17, and hadn’t started puberty my parents & doctor decided to investigate - after many months of numerous blood tests (so many I got used to the light-headed feeling), they decided that I had a slight form of Turners syndrome (more on this in a bit), which...
    sascorpio sascorpio
    41-45, F
    18 Responses Aug 7, 2010

    Whats Life For If Not Having Children?

    I am an only child, I have cousins but we are not a close family and to be honest I'm the second oldest anyway. I met my first husband when I was 17, we married 7 years later and started to try for a family immediately. After a couple of years we saw the doctor, I was diagnosed...
    susani susani
    41-45, F
    7 Responses Aug 9, 2012

    Unnatural Feelings

    I have no idea what to expect in response to my story, sometimes a rant. I appreciate being able to put this out there. My wife and I are approaching 30, been married for about 10 years, and we don't have any kids. Due to medical complications on her end, we postponed trying to...
    shado1234 shado1234
    26-30, M
    Dec 30, 2012

    Missed My Chance..

    I'm a 23 yr old femal that jst had my ovaries and uterus removed due to dermoid cysts. It started in Jan..the pain anyway. But since April, it's been an up-hill battle trying to figure out what was wrong with me. I dealt with chronic pain daily..it was horrible. I finally...
    Bamababydoll Bamababydoll
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Oct 23, 2010

    I Can't Have Children.

    When I was perpetually abused by my boyfriend's dad at the age of 16 (ironically my boyfriend was underage and I was still a virgin so we were going to wait for each other to be ready), I was unaware I had caught something until I got dragged to the sexual health clinic by my...
    pidgeon1991 pidgeon1991
    Nov 18, 2010

    The 50/50 Chance

    Warning: Long, but if you read it you'll understand why. The title of this group does not fit me exactly, but it feels as if it does. See I was born with incorrect DNA. I look normal. I wear normal clothes. Outside of a weekly appliance change and an abnormal way of using the...
    crisc8 crisc8
    31-35, M
    4 Responses Aug 24, 2013

    My breast cancer was estrogen-fed,

    so I was getting hormone shots one a month. My boss asked me if I noticed that I was coming into his office all cranky right before my appointments, so I had them check my levels. The oncologist came in and said they were going to have to move me to monthly shots instead of...
    cherrybabomb cherrybabomb
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Jun 10, 2015

    When I Grow Up

    We all get the question when we're children about what we want to be when we grow up.   My answer changed a lot, except for one detail:  Whatever answer I gave to start, it always ended with "... and a mom!" :)  At various times it was...
    shelbs shelbs
    31-35, F
    10 Responses May 23, 2009

    My Family Won't Let Me

    I'm 26 with a college degree. I may have a disability, but my family members hate me so much that they don't want me to reproduce kids. No one has a problem with my twin sister having 3 kids, but I want to get married & have kids, & they disapprove. So not fair!
    otad12 otad12
    31-35, F
    8 Responses Jan 26, 2010

    told the doctor all about my exwife

    and her friends kicking my balls so hard and so often. (I was embarrassed to say the least) she said i'll probably never produce good *****. she said they successfully ruined me by doing that. but I told her it was ok, because I loved it. then she understood the total no hair...
    askinforit8 askinforit8
    46-50, T
    Aug 7, 2015

    What Is This Life For?

    I'm 26 years old. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for few years now. It just wasn't happening. I decided to see my family doctor about it. I Went for an ultra sound and found a mass. That's what they called. The "C" word was said. I was referred to a specialist...
    StaceyAmelia StaceyAmelia
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jun 20, 2013

    12 Years And Still Praying

    I am a 42 year old woman married 12 years. My husband has two kids, that we raised together. I love them deeply but I have always wanted to have children of my own. Over the years so many ask time and time again, what we are waiting on. I feel so bad becasue I am always at a...
    emptywomb69 emptywomb69
    41-45, F
    1 Response Sep 13, 2011

    No Hope

    All I ever wanted out of life was to be happy with a loving husband and a few children, it was my life goal, I never wanted anything more.I tried to get pregnant for eight years before I eventually conceived my daughter. I've never missed a period, never been late, 28 days, like...
    amigoodenough amigoodenough
    36-40, F
    8 Responses Sep 30, 2012


    How is it possible that I'm mourning the loss of something I have never had.  The pain from a lifetime of broken relationships is absolutely nothing compared to this heartbreak.  It hurts worse than anything I have ever known.
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Jun 2, 2011

    I Feel So Abnormal As A Sixteen Year Old.

    I'm sixteen, and from birth, Doctors knew that I wouldn't be able to have children. When I was around six, I had to have my Ovaries removed because they were abnormal; and since the age of twelve, I've been having to take Hormone-replacement tablets so that my body develops...
    Dinnis04 Dinnis04
    18-21, F
    10 Responses Oct 10, 2012

    "I Can't Have Children"

    I was told last year, when I was diagnossed with PCOS (polycristic ovarian syndrom) that the chances of me having children of my own, and without any specail procudures are slim to nothing. While when I found out this, my heart was broken, in a way, I don't see it as a bad thing...
    DyinToBeLoved DyinToBeLoved
    18-21, F
    5 Responses Apr 28, 2008

    But You Can Change It.

    You can change it, most of the time. I just spent time in training today with someone that works closely with the doctor that helped my wife (not with conception, he saved her life when the other 'doctors' said it could not be done). He stated that his success rate with couples...
    90forlife 90forlife
    41-45, M
    Sep 14, 2013

    Why Cant I Have Chidren

    I'm 32 years old and I can not produce a child .what can someone recommend me to do because me and my fiance really will like to have a baby
    mscountry mscountry
    3 Responses Jul 24, 2013
    jware62114 jware62114
    1 Response Jun 9, 2015


    this story has set in my drafts forever i wasn't for sure if i wanted to post it or not but hopefully it will help me get over some **** and might let other people know there not alone we didn't tell anyone we were continuing with the invetro we felt it was better that wayI sat...
    fallenrach fallenrach
    1 Response Aug 8, 2013

    Society is obsesed with the idea of the nuclear

    family. I am fed ip of being an object of either pity or contempt. I wish there were more portrayals of positive aspects of childless people
    Wilburina Wilburina
    56-60, F
    1 Response Sep 19, 2015

    How Do I Adjust?

    I am 50, and have always wanted children.  I thought I was fertile, but I waited to marry until late, at 37, and only then learned that complications for being a "DES Baby" had compromised my ability to have children.  Several...
    LydiaBlue LydiaBlue
    1 Response Feb 25, 2009

    I find it so painful

    when people tell me they are having a baby. No matter how happy i am for them it will make me cry. I then begin to wish it was me and think that its not fair. I feel like i am being selfish. Like I am not suppose to feel like this. I have wanted a family of my own for years. Now...
    maggiedjp2002 maggiedjp2002
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Aug 11, 2014

    Chromosome Translocation Means I Can'T Have Children

    I have lost 4 children. 2 I lost at 5 months the other 2 I lost at 6 weeks. I have found out that due to a genetic problem I'm unlikely to have healthy children naturally. I've just failed at my second attempt of pre selective IVF. I feel very down and haven't got a very good...
    Paula1234 Paula1234
    1 Response Sep 23, 2013

    I Didnt Think It'd Bother Me So Much

    I cant bare children, its an impossibility for me. I have known this for a long time. That used to not bother me so much when I was younger... but as life goes on... :'( Some nights, it absolutely kills me. I dont know how to put it in to words.... and if I try to talk to the...
    Hellomiakoda Hellomiakoda
    5 Responses Aug 31, 2013

    I tried all my life to have children.

    It didn't happen over and over. I have a long history of depression and anxiety. My husband even had a reverse vasectomy that was very successful. Every month when I would have my cycle, I would cry hysterically. I have 2 stepchildren, but it is not the same. A friend...
    missidoll missidoll
    1 Response Jul 23, 2015


    It's four a.m. and I can't sleep. I'm wide awake, crying my heart out and grieving a life I'll never have. I don't mean to sound dramatic, but I think for many women who fully realize that they can't bare their own children, it's a devastating loss. I've been battling an...
    missmelissal missmelissal
    3 Responses Jan 12, 2013

    I scream, thought no one could hear me.

    i almost feel ashamed that one person could be so important. That without them you somehow become less of a person. I almost want the hurt and pain back of trying to have a baby just to have the small about of joy that comes along with it. they say god has a plan. that he...
    fallenrach fallenrach
    Apr 4, 2015

    Reason I Can't Have Children

    It's two, actually. First, it's financial reasons. I live with my mother in-law and it's very difficult and impossible to find an apartment these days that I can afford and doesn't need credit check, since I have bad credit. My husband is disabled and received SSI, I work full...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Dec 21, 2010

    A Bitter Rant.

    I'm tired of people and their children. "OMG I'M SO HAPPY TO BE A NEW MOMMY!!!" "OMG I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET MY NEW BABY FOR THE FIRST TIME!" "I LOVE BEING A MOM!" Babies this. I'm pregnant that. Mommy this. Mommy that. Look at my kid, it did this. Look at my brat, it said that...
    absolutionist absolutionist
    22-25, F
    8 Responses Dec 21, 2012

    I Cant Have Children, But Was It Ever Meant For Me?

    I cant have children and what an indescribable feeling it is. I am a 37 year old female, who has never been pregnant, nor have I ever been married but can't say that, I have a desire to be either; however, that's whole another story. Currently, I am in a long term (17 yr...
    Chyna331 Chyna331
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Sep 23, 2013

    What Does Compassion Mean?

    i go to many spiritual gatherings,i have studied all major religions,but i cannot understand what people mean when they say this word.''COMPASSION'' for example when i saw the movie gone with the wind,i could see the love and com-passion between scarlet and rhett,but...
    neitha neitha
    56-60, F
    2 Responses Aug 20, 2013


    I have always wanted to be a mother. I didn't really care about a husband, but knew I wanted to be a mother. My older sister has always hated children. She has 2 sons. When they have a play-date or some congregational or communal activity, her husband is the one who deals with it...
    JusT613 JusT613
    3 Responses Oct 28, 2013

    I know i may be a bit too young to worry about

    this, but im getting a surgery next summer, which will cause me to not have children. It kinda hurts knowing that. I mean, I would love to adopt, but its not the same as having my own. I'm not trying to sound selfish for anything, but it's not the same. I just cant stop thinking...
    Anika1258 Anika1258
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Dec 16, 2014

    Two Friends, Two Very Different Days.

    This story could go in many categories here, but, well, here goes nothin'. In the past 24 hours, I've had two distinct but related experiences. Last night, I found out that a much older friend was admitted to hospital. She has been dealing with head and neck cancer for the past...
    leesuhm leesuhm
    1 Response Aug 25, 2013

    I am sixteen years old

    and I have always pictured myself having a family of my own. Two months ago I was told I would never be able to support a child of my own due to damage of my ovaries and a thin uterus. I feel completely robbed of something I've always wanted and have no one to turn to. When I...
    Kristina771 Kristina771
    18-21, F
    Jan 10, 2016

    i promised my bf of 5+yrs i would do my best 2

    give him 4. then we found out that it wasn't likely i could give him ANY and childbirth could even B fatal 4 me. then he left. before we split i asked him how he could leave before letting me at least try 2 give him a child. he told me that he had been trying 2 start OUR family...
    nannyunconceiving nannyunconceiving
    Jan 11, 2014

    hard to explain but i found out i couldn't have

    kids at the age of 14 didn't really concern me back then because i was only young now that I've grown up and found the love of my life i would love nothing more than to have children with her there are obvious ways i could have kids with her but all i can think about is that...
    jimmyy84 jimmyy84
    31-35, M
    2 Responses May 2, 2014

    Oh The Irony

    Since I was a little girl the only thing I wanted was children. Having my kids and loving them like no one ever. When I was 14 I said that I wish i could have a baby right now, but I was responsible enough. I'm 18 now and I found out I can't have them, at all. I was born without...
    s1lenc3 s1lenc3
    18-21, F
    9 Responses Jul 12, 2013


    I happen to come across this forum when looking up some of my options. I am 26 years old and my spouse is 31. I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis when I was 22 years old and was put on IV treatments monthly to basically keep me walking. I also have endometriosis; diagnosed...
    CrystalClear23 CrystalClear23
    26-30, F
    1 Response Aug 11, 2013

    Not Getting Any Easier

    I'm 38, married, and can't have children, nor can I adopt. I found out several years ago that my tubes were blocked, and I had surgery to open them, which was successful, but 6 months later they had closed again. I had the option of in vitro, but at the time could not afford it...
    jkai jkai
    36-40, F
    5 Responses Sep 21, 2009

    The Hardest Decision of My Life......

    Six year ago (approx) I had a bad fall which rsulted in me breaking parts of my back and severly displaced my right hip.... I am fine now to the point where I walk how any one does, but I have issues with my right hip and my back gives me grief and aches after too much use...
    GothAngel GothAngel
    26-30, F
    11 Responses Jan 24, 2008

    I've Passed The Worst Part!

    The day my future seemed to shatter before my eyes, I thought I wouldn't make it! Everytime I looked my husband in the eyes my heart was ripped out of my chest. Just knowing that this man that I love will never have the family he deserves. That I will never carry our child! I dug...
    StaceyAmelia StaceyAmelia
    26-30, F
    Oct 27, 2013

    this weekend is always the hardest

    for me. I have the weekend off my husband is at work threw the day, I sit here in this empty house. I read a book, clean the house, take a walk. anything to make me feel anything but the pain and heart ack that I feel. some days I think I'm over not being a mother but this...
    fallenrach fallenrach
    2 Responses May 9, 2015

    Unable to Have Children

    I have always wanted children...maybe it's just engrained in my head that I'm not a woman if I don't...I dunno. I tried having children since I was 22...with absolutely no luck at all. I was first diagnosed with severe depression when I was just 13. Since then, I have been on...
    Lexicon78 Lexicon78
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Apr 17, 2008

    Shoved In My Face

    I always wanted to settle down and start a family. I always did. But how is that possible if I can't make a family of my own? I'm all for adoptions, but it still hurts. I will never have a child of my own. It's stuffed in my face every time I see a mother and child walking down...
    BloodRedShadow BloodRedShadow
    3 Responses Jun 28, 2012

    Ill Never

    I'll never feel you kick inside of me I'll never get morning sickness I'll never have your father rub my belly and talk to you I'll never hold you in my arms for the first time I'll never sit back and watch your father hold you and tell you how much he loves you I'll never have...
    fallenrach fallenrach
    5 Responses Jun 21, 2013

    My Niece Turns One Today

    i cant tell my husband i don't want to go i cant stop him from having a niece that he needs to know, he is a great uncle to bad he'll never be a dad, today hurts me more then he will ever know.after out 2cd failed attempt at ivf my sister in law announced they were pregnanti cant...
    fallenrach fallenrach
    1 Response Sep 29, 2013
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